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1
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Ooh,
2
00:00:01,720 --> 00:00:04,188
tonight is the night, man.
3
00:00:04,227 --> 00:00:06,464
Mm, "The Guest Book" is on. Whoo!
4
00:00:06,584 --> 00:00:08,940
Hey, it's not too late to catch up,
especially since, basically
5
00:00:09,060 --> 00:00:12,928
it's a new story each episode.
But the people in the town...
6
00:00:13,048 --> 00:00:15,094
They have some stuff going on, too.
7
00:00:15,214 --> 00:00:17,371
The doctor that lives
next door to the cabin
8
00:00:17,373 --> 00:00:19,196
is preparing for his wife to come visit.
9
00:00:19,316 --> 00:00:21,189
But the little lady cop is bummed out,
10
00:00:21,309 --> 00:00:23,273
'cause I think she has
a mad crush on him.
11
00:00:23,393 --> 00:00:24,821
And remember how I told you
12
00:00:24,941 --> 00:00:26,879
the stripper's blackmailing
the guy who rents the cabins?
13
00:00:26,999 --> 00:00:28,952
Well, she found someone
to rent Froggy Cottage,
14
00:00:29,072 --> 00:00:32,021
so I think this week, that's
who's gonna stay there.
15
00:00:32,141 --> 00:00:35,505
Damn. Do you have a
dollar I could borrow?
16
00:00:35,625 --> 00:00:38,125
- Thanks.
- You gonna watch the show?
17
00:00:38,127 --> 00:00:39,660
You gonna watch the show?
18
00:00:39,662 --> 00:00:41,195
You gonna watch the show?
19
00:01:04,027 --> 00:01:07,670
- Synced and corrected by medvidecek007 -
- www.addic7ed.com -
20
00:01:14,309 --> 00:01:16,242
So, what brings you to México?
21
00:01:16,244 --> 00:01:17,772
Let me guess...
22
00:01:17,892 --> 00:01:20,285
- A beautiful woman.
- No,
23
00:01:20,405 --> 00:01:23,631
beautiful women are too much
work. I prefer slightly older,
24
00:01:23,637 --> 00:01:26,858
slightly damaged women
with big bank accounts.
25
00:01:26,864 --> 00:01:28,244
Look.
26
00:01:29,119 --> 00:01:31,353
This one bought me a car.
27
00:01:31,355 --> 00:01:34,623
This one paid for my calf implants.
28
00:01:34,625 --> 00:01:38,126
And this one here is the
reason I'm in Mexico.
29
00:01:40,564 --> 00:01:44,166
No one is 100% honest in
their online dating profile.
30
00:01:44,168 --> 00:01:46,522
Mine doesn't disclose
that I have webbed toes,
31
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and Marta's failed to mention
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00:01:48,319 --> 00:01:50,997
that she made her
fortune selling cocaine.
33
00:01:50,999 --> 00:01:53,633
But who am I to judge people
on how they pay my bills?
34
00:01:53,635 --> 00:01:55,068
Hey, baby.
35
00:01:55,070 --> 00:01:57,854
Since you like poems so
much, I wrote one for you.
36
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"Roses are red, violets are blue.
37
00:02:00,300 --> 00:02:02,907
"Time to dry off and put your wiener
38
00:02:02,913 --> 00:02:05,593
"inside Mommy."
39
00:02:13,415 --> 00:02:16,215
- Mierda.
- I can't go to jail.
40
00:02:16,221 --> 00:02:18,835
I'm too pretty, and I know too much
about thread count. I'll testify.
41
00:02:18,841 --> 00:02:21,424
She told me she gets her drugs
from the Colombian cartel.
42
00:02:21,430 --> 00:02:22,611
Puta rata!
43
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Ohh, man!
44
00:02:27,958 --> 00:02:31,520
Not ladylike, Marta!
Not ladylike in the least!
45
00:02:39,561 --> 00:02:41,952
They want me to take your statement here
46
00:02:41,958 --> 00:02:44,599
rather than risk you
being seen at the station.
47
00:02:44,601 --> 00:02:47,569
The Colombian cartel
have people everywhere.
48
00:02:47,837 --> 00:02:49,328
But...
49
00:02:49,799 --> 00:02:51,666
If you want a little free advice,
50
00:02:51,672 --> 00:02:54,342
if you just keep your mouth
shut, you'll be out in a year.
51
00:02:54,814 --> 00:02:56,994
If you testify, there'll be a price
52
00:02:57,000 --> 00:02:58,848
on your head for the rest of your life.
53
00:02:58,854 --> 00:03:00,795
Aw, don't worry about me, buddy.
54
00:03:00,801 --> 00:03:04,747
I got enough cash hidden away to
make sure they'll never find me.
55
00:03:04,753 --> 00:03:07,084
Oh, shit,
56
00:03:07,147 --> 00:03:08,680
shit, shit!!
57
00:03:08,686 --> 00:03:11,918
I warned you! They have
people everywhere!
58
00:03:11,924 --> 00:03:14,124
Realizing they would stop at nothing
59
00:03:14,156 --> 00:03:15,856
to keep me from testifying,
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00:03:15,858 --> 00:03:17,735
after a few weeks, the
cops decided to move me
61
00:03:17,741 --> 00:03:19,703
to a safe house in the mountains.
62
00:03:19,709 --> 00:03:22,641
When you get there, do a
sweep for potential weapons.
63
00:03:22,647 --> 00:03:25,599
I will, Dad. I've been
doing this for 20 years.
64
00:03:25,601 --> 00:03:27,588
Besides, I don't think
65
00:03:27,594 --> 00:03:29,319
I have much to worry
about with this guy.
66
00:03:29,325 --> 00:03:31,468
Call me tonight. I'm off to a potluck.
67
00:03:31,474 --> 00:03:32,873
Love you.
68
00:03:32,879 --> 00:03:35,179
We're out of the city.
You can sit up now.
69
00:03:35,185 --> 00:03:37,531
How do you know Marta's people
don't know where you're taking me?
70
00:03:37,537 --> 00:03:40,430
I promise you're safe, trust me.
My father's the head
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00:03:40,436 --> 00:03:43,918
of the department, and as you can
tell, he's a little overprotective...
72
00:03:43,924 --> 00:03:47,559
Won't assign me to anything the
least bit dangerous or exciting.
73
00:03:47,561 --> 00:03:49,308
I'm six years away from retirement,
74
00:03:49,314 --> 00:03:50,840
and I haven't even been shot at yet.
75
00:03:50,846 --> 00:03:53,772
You know what might be exciting?
If I didn't have to testify.
76
00:03:53,778 --> 00:03:55,600
You could just drop me
off at my apartment,
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00:03:55,602 --> 00:03:57,636
let me grab a few things,
let me disappear.
78
00:03:57,638 --> 00:03:59,293
Yeah, right.
79
00:03:59,522 --> 00:04:01,704
If you like, we could
80
00:04:01,735 --> 00:04:04,229
get to know each other
a little while we're there.
81
00:04:04,478 --> 00:04:06,478
Keep dreaming.
82
00:04:06,480 --> 00:04:08,847
If this woman was heavier, older,
83
00:04:08,849 --> 00:04:10,770
or uglier, I might have had a shot.
84
00:04:10,776 --> 00:04:14,052
But my powers don't tend to
work on anything above a five.
85
00:04:16,641 --> 00:04:18,069
I think they're here.
86
00:04:18,075 --> 00:04:19,841
If you don't mind, could you at least
87
00:04:19,843 --> 00:04:22,177
go over the Froggy Cottage
house rules with them?
88
00:04:22,179 --> 00:04:24,546
We're the ones doing
the blackmailing, dipshit.
89
00:04:24,548 --> 00:04:27,893
We make the rules, not you.
90
00:04:30,362 --> 00:04:32,562
Holy shit.
91
00:04:32,689 --> 00:04:35,990
That guy looks like a
weatherman or something.
92
00:04:35,992 --> 00:04:37,859
I-I got to go find my eyelashes.
93
00:04:40,764 --> 00:04:42,130
- Hi.
- Hi.
94
00:04:42,132 --> 00:04:44,929
- We're here to pick up some keys.
- Um, yeah.
95
00:04:44,935 --> 00:04:46,801
Come on in.
96
00:04:46,803 --> 00:04:49,384
"The downstairs toilet needs to be
97
00:04:49,390 --> 00:04:52,140
"handled with care, a frown symbol.
98
00:04:52,142 --> 00:04:54,576
"The bolts are loose, a smile symbol."
99
00:04:54,578 --> 00:04:57,231
- Those are parenthesis.
- "No pets.
100
00:04:57,239 --> 00:04:59,514
"No smoking."
101
00:04:59,516 --> 00:05:02,050
A famous poet once said
that in order to create,
102
00:05:02,052 --> 00:05:03,849
one must first observe.
103
00:05:03,855 --> 00:05:05,921
And I was observing
that I might have found
104
00:05:05,927 --> 00:05:08,323
the perfect woman to
help me create my escape.
105
00:05:08,325 --> 00:05:10,792
"Do not feed the wildlife.
106
00:05:11,202 --> 00:05:14,406
"Please shower prior
to using the hot tub.
107
00:05:15,085 --> 00:05:18,153
"And lastly, no jumping on the bed.
108
00:05:18,159 --> 00:05:19,701
"No jumping on the couch.
109
00:05:19,703 --> 00:05:22,299
- "No jumping on..."
- We're not gonna be doing any jumping.
110
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Let's go.
111
00:05:36,153 --> 00:05:39,287
Aw, man, I got to go to the bathroom.
112
00:05:40,991 --> 00:05:43,691
What's with all the secrecy?
113
00:05:43,693 --> 00:05:45,887
- Are you scared of your chauffeur?
- She's a cop,
114
00:05:45,893 --> 00:05:47,562
and I'm her prisoner.
115
00:05:47,564 --> 00:05:49,620
Oh, my God, that is so hot.
116
00:05:49,626 --> 00:05:51,424
Normally, I enjoy a little
117
00:05:51,448 --> 00:05:53,230
cat-and-mousing when I romance a woman.
118
00:05:53,236 --> 00:05:56,304
But I needed this stripper
to fall in love with me fast.
119
00:05:56,306 --> 00:05:58,736
From the second I saw you,
120
00:05:58,742 --> 00:06:00,675
I knew there was something between us.
121
00:06:00,677 --> 00:06:03,244
I felt it, too.
122
00:06:03,246 --> 00:06:05,346
It was like a thunderbolt.
123
00:06:05,348 --> 00:06:08,016
I wish we could be together.
124
00:06:08,018 --> 00:06:09,770
I mean, we could if you...
125
00:06:09,776 --> 00:06:11,521
No, I should go.
126
00:06:11,527 --> 00:06:13,527
If... If I what?
127
00:06:17,427 --> 00:06:18,993
If you help me escape.
128
00:06:18,995 --> 00:06:21,262
I've got a suitcase full of
cash stashed in my apartment.
129
00:06:21,264 --> 00:06:22,764
If you can bring it back here
130
00:06:22,766 --> 00:06:24,265
and follow a few simple instructions,
131
00:06:24,267 --> 00:06:27,769
you and I could be making
love on a Mexican beach.
132
00:06:36,646 --> 00:06:37,882
I'm in.
133
00:06:38,318 --> 00:06:40,867
This is unbelievable. Unbelievable!
134
00:06:40,888 --> 00:06:42,939
I don't know why you're being a dick.
135
00:06:43,059 --> 00:06:45,273
Maybe because I invited you up here
for the weekend, so we can work on
136
00:06:45,393 --> 00:06:47,238
our marriage, and you brought
a date and you brought a date.
137
00:06:47,358 --> 00:06:49,265
Well, if you didn't want me
to bring a guest, you should
138
00:06:49,385 --> 00:06:51,597
have been more specific in your text.
Stop using so many emojis.
139
00:06:51,603 --> 00:06:54,567
- It makes you look like a pussy.
- I was trying to...
140
00:06:56,079 --> 00:06:58,964
You're trying to make me yell, look
like a monster in front of Bryce.
141
00:06:58,970 --> 00:07:01,504
- I'm not gonna play your game.
- No, you'll play your own game
142
00:07:01,510 --> 00:07:04,203
and try to look cooler than me
by getting our son a crossbow.
143
00:07:04,209 --> 00:07:07,180
By the way, that's about to backfire.
144
00:07:07,461 --> 00:07:08,945
Cool!
145
00:07:08,947 --> 00:07:11,092
Dad, he hit the bull's-eye!
146
00:07:11,098 --> 00:07:13,116
You can't even hit the target.
147
00:07:13,118 --> 00:07:14,931
Where'd you meet this guy again?
148
00:07:14,937 --> 00:07:17,058
At the archery range.
149
00:07:19,146 --> 00:07:21,212
Bull's-eye!!
150
00:07:48,705 --> 00:07:50,138
Oh, no!
151
00:07:53,977 --> 00:07:55,977
Chubbys. We won't tell if you don't.
152
00:07:56,184 --> 00:07:58,451
Yeah, we got a serious
problem with the toilet.
153
00:07:58,457 --> 00:08:00,811
- It fell over.
- Oh, my.
154
00:08:01,135 --> 00:08:02,835
Well, I'm so sorry to hear that.
155
00:08:02,841 --> 00:08:05,186
These wrenches are expensive.
This is the biggest one
156
00:08:05,192 --> 00:08:07,455
- I could fit down my pant.
- Shh!
157
00:08:07,457 --> 00:08:09,357
I'll be there as soon as I can.
158
00:08:10,994 --> 00:08:13,028
Hey, Kombucha, powder your clam.
159
00:08:13,030 --> 00:08:15,103
You're working a double shift tonight.
160
00:08:19,196 --> 00:08:20,830
My new boyfriend needs me.
161
00:08:24,348 --> 00:08:25,647
I like this story.
162
00:08:25,653 --> 00:08:27,513
You have a really good way with words.
163
00:08:27,519 --> 00:08:29,857
Thanks! I majored in poetry.
164
00:08:29,863 --> 00:08:32,412
Look at you... A poet gigolo.
165
00:08:33,824 --> 00:08:35,540
Poet gigolo.
166
00:08:35,549 --> 00:08:37,200
Yeah. I like that.
167
00:08:37,206 --> 00:08:39,061
If they ever make my story into a movie,
168
00:08:39,063 --> 00:08:41,053
- I'm gonna pitch that as a title.
- I have a cousin
169
00:08:41,059 --> 00:08:42,387
who works at Disney.
170
00:08:42,393 --> 00:08:45,795
In the park, but I bet he knows someone.
171
00:08:46,082 --> 00:08:48,682
Anyway, where were we?
172
00:08:50,414 --> 00:08:51,578
Sorry about this.
173
00:08:51,584 --> 00:08:53,866
Hopefully we can get your
potty back up on its feet.
174
00:09:00,157 --> 00:09:01,356
Hey, Dad.
175
00:09:01,358 --> 00:09:03,420
Yes, everything is fine,
176
00:09:03,456 --> 00:09:05,729
except plumbing issues.
177
00:09:06,210 --> 00:09:09,244
No, I didn't drink milk. I'm
talking about the house.
178
00:09:09,250 --> 00:09:10,912
No, the owner's here,
179
00:09:10,918 --> 00:09:12,476
and she's trying to fix it.
180
00:09:14,204 --> 00:09:15,570
Some stripper.
181
00:09:17,541 --> 00:09:19,607
No, you're right.
182
00:09:21,545 --> 00:09:23,011
You're right. I...
183
00:09:23,013 --> 00:09:25,113
I-I'll get rid of her.
184
00:09:28,251 --> 00:09:29,317
You know what?
185
00:09:29,319 --> 00:09:32,110
We'll just use the bathroom
upstairs. You can go.
186
00:09:32,399 --> 00:09:33,465
Oh, okay.
187
00:09:33,471 --> 00:09:36,259
Well, if you have any more problems,
feel free to give me a call.
188
00:09:36,265 --> 00:09:37,559
I'll be at Chubbys...
189
00:09:37,561 --> 00:09:39,861
All night.
190
00:09:42,923 --> 00:09:44,899
You can watch TV for a
while if you want...
191
00:09:45,146 --> 00:09:47,347
Anything but "American Horror Story."
192
00:09:47,353 --> 00:09:49,586
That shit is dumb as hell.
193
00:09:51,137 --> 00:09:53,137
Um, I think I might brush my teeth.
194
00:09:53,143 --> 00:09:54,576
Sink still works, right?
195
00:09:54,582 --> 00:09:56,548
I assume so, yep.
196
00:10:02,617 --> 00:10:04,484
Hey, Dad. It's me.
197
00:10:04,806 --> 00:10:06,739
Yeah, I know it's been a while.
198
00:10:06,745 --> 00:10:09,620
No, no, don't have Mom jump on.
I need to ask you a question.
199
00:10:10,043 --> 00:10:12,178
No, I can't talk louder. I'm...
200
00:10:12,180 --> 00:10:13,879
At a library.
201
00:10:13,881 --> 00:10:16,248
Hey, you remember the time you
accidentally knocked me out
202
00:10:16,250 --> 00:10:18,203
with a softball bat when I was 7?
203
00:10:18,209 --> 00:10:20,650
Yeah, do you remember
how hard you hit me,
204
00:10:20,727 --> 00:10:22,035
do you know,
205
00:10:22,041 --> 00:10:24,062
knock me out but not kill me?
206
00:10:24,068 --> 00:10:25,968
Was it...
207
00:10:25,974 --> 00:10:27,668
Hi, Mom.
208
00:10:28,192 --> 00:10:30,678
No, I hadn't heard about Aunt Rose.
209
00:10:31,462 --> 00:10:33,328
'Cause I'm at a library!
210
00:10:53,617 --> 00:10:54,817
Is that a sonnet?
211
00:10:54,819 --> 00:10:56,970
No. Maybe. Why?
212
00:10:56,976 --> 00:10:59,105
You just don't see a lot
of people writing sonnets,
213
00:10:59,111 --> 00:11:01,156
- that's all.
- I... I-It's not really...
214
00:11:01,158 --> 00:11:04,285
Sometimes I... I like to
write down my feelings.
215
00:11:04,291 --> 00:11:06,692
I minored in poetry, so...
216
00:11:06,698 --> 00:11:08,631
How'd you know it was a sonnet?
217
00:11:08,637 --> 00:11:11,187
I majored in poetry. Let's hear it.
218
00:11:15,272 --> 00:11:17,873
I can't believe I'm doing this.
219
00:11:20,644 --> 00:11:22,686
"As darkness falls upon my story,
220
00:11:22,692 --> 00:11:24,646
"is all my triumph in the past?
221
00:11:24,914 --> 00:11:26,914
"When I look back on all the glory,
222
00:11:26,920 --> 00:11:29,251
"did I answer what my heart asked?
223
00:11:29,296 --> 00:11:31,149
"A journey started with a shout,
224
00:11:31,155 --> 00:11:33,155
"slowly turned into a whisper.
225
00:11:33,157 --> 00:11:35,224
"Regrets are had without a doubt,
226
00:11:35,226 --> 00:11:37,693
"wishing the end could be crisper.
227
00:11:37,699 --> 00:11:39,628
"Are the hopes and dreams of fools
228
00:11:39,634 --> 00:11:42,058
"just windmills in the distance?
229
00:11:42,064 --> 00:11:44,279
"Silly dreams for stubborn mules,
230
00:11:44,285 --> 00:11:46,397
"on the path of least resistance?
231
00:11:46,709 --> 00:11:49,295
"If so, I hope the end comes quick
232
00:11:49,301 --> 00:11:51,107
"and no one asks me why
233
00:11:51,113 --> 00:11:53,018
"I didn't chase my windmills,
234
00:11:53,306 --> 00:11:56,011
"'cause I fear I might just cry."
235
00:11:58,054 --> 00:12:01,121
You don't understand it, so...
236
00:12:01,127 --> 00:12:02,727
Of course I do.
237
00:12:02,836 --> 00:12:05,540
"As darkness falls upon my story"...
238
00:12:05,546 --> 00:12:08,388
It's about getting older. And
then it goes into how your job
239
00:12:08,394 --> 00:12:10,027
has become more routine, less exciting.
240
00:12:10,033 --> 00:12:13,478
"A journey started with a shout,
slowly turned into a whisper."
241
00:12:13,480 --> 00:12:15,747
But then you ask the question,
242
00:12:15,749 --> 00:12:17,949
"Am I wrong to expect more out of life?"
243
00:12:17,951 --> 00:12:20,819
Or "Are the hopes and
dreams of fools just
244
00:12:20,821 --> 00:12:22,720
windmills in the distance?"
245
00:12:22,726 --> 00:12:24,068
It's good.
246
00:12:24,145 --> 00:12:25,690
I don't like the end, though.
247
00:12:25,692 --> 00:12:26,925
It's too sad.
248
00:12:26,927 --> 00:12:28,526
You have two lines left in your sonnet
249
00:12:28,528 --> 00:12:31,596
to choose any ending you
like, and you went so dark.
250
00:12:31,737 --> 00:12:34,369
I don't see darkness
in you. I see light.
251
00:12:45,878 --> 00:12:48,498
And there - my first seven.
252
00:12:50,084 --> 00:12:52,650
Okay, so, I just had sex
with the cop, right?
253
00:12:53,015 --> 00:12:55,517
Scratch that... We made love.
254
00:12:56,883 --> 00:12:59,550
I might have to see if
we can delay the trial
255
00:12:59,556 --> 00:13:02,257
so we can stay up here
a couple of extra days.
256
00:13:04,169 --> 00:13:06,402
I'm sorry. Uh...
257
00:13:06,408 --> 00:13:08,914
- What are you doing?
- Escaping. Again,
258
00:13:08,930 --> 00:13:10,871
- so sorry.
- You used me?
259
00:13:10,888 --> 00:13:12,831
No, I didn't. I promise.
260
00:13:12,837 --> 00:13:14,825
Look, I'm really sorry about this.
261
00:13:14,831 --> 00:13:16,517
It's not everyday I meet
someone who shares
262
00:13:16,523 --> 00:13:18,849
my passion for poetry.
I actually like you.
263
00:13:18,855 --> 00:13:21,053
That never happens with the
women I take advantage of,
264
00:13:21,059 --> 00:13:24,091
that I stole but right now
there's a suitcase full of cash
265
00:13:24,097 --> 00:13:26,493
from my drug-dealing
ex-girlfriend being guarded by
266
00:13:26,499 --> 00:13:28,359
a stripper named Tickles,
so I've got to go.
267
00:13:30,234 --> 00:13:31,370
I'm sorry.
268
00:13:34,801 --> 00:13:36,534
Oh!
269
00:13:36,536 --> 00:13:38,208
"The top of the bedpost in
270
00:13:38,263 --> 00:13:40,334
"the downstairs bedroom is loose.
271
00:13:40,340 --> 00:13:43,224
"If it falls off, just put it back."
272
00:13:57,746 --> 00:13:59,172
Blake.
273
00:13:59,461 --> 00:14:02,462
Oh, my God. Okay.
274
00:14:02,854 --> 00:14:04,187
Wait!
275
00:14:04,331 --> 00:14:06,108
Jessica, wait!
276
00:14:06,579 --> 00:14:07,978
Please, don't go.
277
00:14:07,984 --> 00:14:10,398
I promise I won't talk about
you bringing a date anymore.
278
00:14:10,404 --> 00:14:12,003
And, look, I bought us dinner.
279
00:14:12,005 --> 00:14:14,272
We'll take ours to go.
280
00:14:14,274 --> 00:14:16,574
That bag's just chopsticks and napkins.
281
00:14:16,576 --> 00:14:18,309
Please, you're being crazy.
282
00:14:18,311 --> 00:14:19,909
I only see my son every two weeks.
283
00:14:19,915 --> 00:14:22,356
And who's fault is that? Asshole!
284
00:14:22,362 --> 00:14:25,864
I think this is the slippery
shrimp and orange chicken.
285
00:14:27,020 --> 00:14:29,621
You can be a real bitch
sometimes, you know that?
286
00:14:29,623 --> 00:14:32,223
Sometimes I wish I never met you!
287
00:14:33,994 --> 00:14:36,728
Hey, Daddy didn't mean
to yell. That's not who I am.
288
00:14:36,734 --> 00:14:40,202
Uh... I'll see you in a
couple weeks, okay, buddy?
289
00:14:40,208 --> 00:14:42,475
Hey, I'm gonna practice that crossbow!
290
00:14:49,575 --> 00:14:50,711
Uh...
291
00:14:51,246 --> 00:14:52,645
come on inside.
292
00:14:52,707 --> 00:14:54,379
Checkbook's in the house.
293
00:14:57,384 --> 00:14:58,950
How's the methadone?
294
00:14:58,952 --> 00:15:00,825
It's not as good as heroin.
295
00:15:00,831 --> 00:15:02,427
What the hell happened?
296
00:15:02,433 --> 00:15:04,085
He attacked me with a wrench.
297
00:15:04,091 --> 00:15:07,525
You were right. I never should
have let the owner of the house in.
298
00:15:07,531 --> 00:15:10,062
I think he's headed to a bikini bar.
299
00:15:10,068 --> 00:15:12,521
I'm sending backup. Don't
go there until they arrive.
300
00:15:12,527 --> 00:15:15,337
Dad, I can do this alone.
301
00:15:16,681 --> 00:15:19,041
What do you mean you're
"Giving me the club?"
302
00:15:19,047 --> 00:15:20,158
I'm leaving the country.
303
00:15:20,164 --> 00:15:21,673
Rent's due on the first of the month.
304
00:15:21,675 --> 00:15:23,648
Oh, and the beer distributor's
been giving me a discount
305
00:15:23,654 --> 00:15:25,164
'cause I blew him in a parking lot,
306
00:15:25,170 --> 00:15:27,212
but you'll probably have
to start paying full price.
307
00:15:27,214 --> 00:15:28,636
Unless he swings both ways.
308
00:15:28,642 --> 00:15:30,943
It's possible. He did cry afterwards.
309
00:15:33,870 --> 00:15:35,202
Yeah, I'm gonna pay full price.
310
00:15:35,204 --> 00:15:37,238
But do I have to keep it a bikini bar?
311
00:15:37,240 --> 00:15:39,261
'Cause I always thought we
could do better as a sports bar.
312
00:15:39,267 --> 00:15:41,995
Do whatever you want. I'll
be making love on a beach.
313
00:15:51,759 --> 00:15:53,459
Aw, nuts.
314
00:15:53,609 --> 00:15:56,443
This'll be a lot easier if you
just tell me where he is.
315
00:15:56,449 --> 00:15:58,816
I told you. I don't know where he is.
316
00:16:04,366 --> 00:16:06,300
He couldn't have gotten far.
317
00:16:06,306 --> 00:16:07,556
I'll be back.
318
00:16:07,596 --> 00:16:09,162
The next time you see your boyfriend,
319
00:16:09,164 --> 00:16:11,931
you'll be handcuffed to each
other on your way to jail.
320
00:16:15,737 --> 00:16:16,936
Wait, wait!
321
00:16:23,128 --> 00:16:25,262
Did he really tell you
he was my boyfriend?
322
00:16:45,534 --> 00:16:47,567
Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa.
323
00:16:47,569 --> 00:16:49,269
What the hell just happened?
324
00:16:49,271 --> 00:16:50,793
You're surprised, right?
325
00:16:50,799 --> 00:16:53,068
See, as soon as you got me
thinking this could be a movie,
326
00:16:53,074 --> 00:16:55,809
I left out some stuff to make
the ending more unexpected.
327
00:16:55,811 --> 00:16:57,911
Ah, a twist!
328
00:16:58,165 --> 00:16:59,531
I love a good twist.
329
00:16:59,537 --> 00:17:01,770
Of course you do.
Everyone loves a twist.
330
00:17:03,652 --> 00:17:06,753
Are you going to tell
me what you left out?
331
00:17:06,755 --> 00:17:07,950
Yeah, in a sec.
332
00:17:08,174 --> 00:17:10,145
Everyone loves suspense, too.
333
00:17:15,436 --> 00:17:17,536
Okay!
334
00:17:17,538 --> 00:17:19,401
Here's what I left out.
335
00:17:20,241 --> 00:17:21,682
Blake.
336
00:17:22,376 --> 00:17:24,897
Oh, my God. Okay.
337
00:17:25,358 --> 00:17:26,612
Wait!
338
00:17:26,878 --> 00:17:28,344
Jessica, wait!
339
00:17:32,735 --> 00:17:35,349
Fine. If you got to shoot
me, then shoot me.
340
00:17:35,355 --> 00:17:38,289
At least it'll be quicker than
whatever the cartel does to me.
341
00:17:44,475 --> 00:17:45,965
Take me with you.
342
00:17:45,967 --> 00:17:47,299
What?
343
00:17:47,301 --> 00:17:50,142
You said the ending of
my poem was too sad.
344
00:17:50,148 --> 00:17:51,814
Help me write a new one.
345
00:17:51,820 --> 00:17:54,618
"Riding into the sunset
with my brand-new honey
346
00:17:54,624 --> 00:17:57,472
"and a suitcase full of
some drug dealer's money"
347
00:17:57,478 --> 00:17:58,944
is a much better rhyme than
348
00:17:58,946 --> 00:18:01,414
"Sitting all alone eating Lean Cuisine,
349
00:18:01,416 --> 00:18:04,684
"watching 'Magic Mike'
while I diddle my bean."
350
00:18:04,694 --> 00:18:06,561
My head and my heart,
351
00:18:06,567 --> 00:18:08,852
they battle within, if
I don't find love now,
352
00:18:08,876 --> 00:18:10,299
I have to ask when
353
00:18:10,305 --> 00:18:13,199
will I ever find someone
as perfect as you?
354
00:18:13,205 --> 00:18:16,378
But that stripper has my
money, so what can we do?
355
00:18:16,384 --> 00:18:19,398
Please! I'm a cop with a badge,
she sells peeks at her vag.
356
00:18:19,400 --> 00:18:22,068
I can get all your cash,
we'll be gone in a flash.
357
00:18:22,070 --> 00:18:24,463
But in case we get caught,
I can't go to jail.
358
00:18:24,469 --> 00:18:25,872
Of course.
359
00:18:25,878 --> 00:18:27,578
So, the story must be
360
00:18:28,391 --> 00:18:30,610
that you took me by force.
361
00:18:36,818 --> 00:18:38,451
Now, that's a great ending.
362
00:18:38,453 --> 00:18:40,346
Thanks. We didn't actually do
363
00:18:40,352 --> 00:18:42,758
all that rhyming at the end, but
with the success of "Hamilton,"
364
00:18:42,764 --> 00:18:44,577
I think I'm gonna put that in the movie.
365
00:18:44,583 --> 00:18:47,810
Oh, I wouldn't. That shit is
starting to get really played out.
366
00:18:49,245 --> 00:18:50,645
- Where's your girl?
- Oh,
367
00:18:50,651 --> 00:18:52,384
we drove about 3 miles down the road,
368
00:18:52,386 --> 00:18:53,985
and I ditched her at a truck stop.
369
00:18:53,987 --> 00:18:55,887
Once I was free and had all my money,
370
00:18:55,889 --> 00:18:58,256
I realized her poem kind of sucked.
371
00:19:02,004 --> 00:19:03,662
How did you get down here?
372
00:19:03,664 --> 00:19:06,145
Mm. I drove her car. Why?
373
00:19:06,503 --> 00:19:07,707
Shit.
374
00:19:07,713 --> 00:19:10,028
You don't think they have a
way to track those, do you?
375
00:19:14,038 --> 00:19:15,487
Another twist.
376
00:19:16,073 --> 00:19:18,107
Another twist.
377
00:19:18,340 --> 00:19:21,708
♪ When I see my baby ♪
378
00:19:21,714 --> 00:19:23,213
... with that foolishness.
379
00:19:23,219 --> 00:19:25,723
♪ What do I see? ♪
380
00:19:26,298 --> 00:19:28,267
♪ Poetry ♪
381
00:19:28,954 --> 00:19:31,737
♪ Poetry in motion ♪
382
00:19:33,396 --> 00:19:36,530
♪ Poetry in motion ♪
383
00:19:36,532 --> 00:19:39,734
♪ Walkin' by my side ♪
384
00:19:39,736 --> 00:19:43,738
♪ Her lovely locomotion ♪
385
00:19:43,740 --> 00:19:47,808
♪ Keeps my eyes open wide ♪
386
00:19:47,810 --> 00:19:50,778
♪ Poetry in motion ♪
387
00:19:50,780 --> 00:19:54,348
♪ See her gentle sway ♪
388
00:19:54,350 --> 00:19:57,618
♪ A wave out on the ocean ♪
389
00:19:57,620 --> 00:20:00,855
♪ Could never move that way ♪
390
00:20:00,857 --> 00:20:04,759
♪ I love every movement ♪
391
00:20:04,761 --> 00:20:08,362
♪ There's nothing I would change ♪
392
00:20:08,364 --> 00:20:11,766
♪ She doesn't need improvement ♪
393
00:20:11,768 --> 00:20:16,303
♪ She's much too nice to rearrange ♪
394
00:20:16,305 --> 00:20:19,240
♪ Poetry in motion ♪
395
00:20:19,242 --> 00:20:22,410
♪ Dancing close to me ♪
396
00:20:22,412 --> 00:20:25,746
♪ A flower of devotion ♪
397
00:20:25,748 --> 00:20:29,216
♪ A-swaying gracefully ♪
398
00:20:29,218 --> 00:20:31,085
♪ Whoa, oh, oh ♪
399
00:20:31,087 --> 00:20:33,025
♪ Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, ♪
400
00:20:33,088 --> 00:20:36,056
♪ whoa, whoa-oh, whoa, oh ♪
401
00:20:36,062 --> 00:20:38,658
Hi. My name is Adam.
402
00:20:38,664 --> 00:20:41,228
I'm here to get the
keys to Froggy Cottage.
403
00:20:41,230 --> 00:20:43,188
I planned a surprise date.
404
00:20:43,495 --> 00:20:45,581
Ooh. Mints.
405
00:20:45,612 --> 00:20:47,270
Hmm. May I?
406
00:20:47,276 --> 00:20:49,081
- Knock yourself out.
- Yeah?
407
00:20:49,087 --> 00:20:50,520
Uh-huh.
408
00:20:53,617 --> 00:20:57,016
- Synced and corrected by medvidecek007 -
- www.addic7ed.com -
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