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1
00:00:02,741 --> 00:00:04,352
Just a young gun
with a quick fuse...
2
00:00:04,395 --> 00:00:06,354
Dave, look at
all these hipsters.
3
00:00:06,397 --> 00:00:08,399
Are we cool enough
to be here?
4
00:00:08,443 --> 00:00:10,575
Oh, yeah. Look,
you know, Gemma,
5
00:00:10,619 --> 00:00:14,492
some people need mustaches
and suspenders to feel cool.
6
00:00:14,536 --> 00:00:16,581
Some of us are
born with it.
7
00:00:16,625 --> 00:00:18,670
[chuckles]
8
00:00:18,714 --> 00:00:20,716
Hey, look,
it's Marty over there.
9
00:00:20,759 --> 00:00:22,239
Oh, cool.
Let's go say hi.
10
00:00:22,283 --> 00:00:24,154
Oh, no. I don't want
to go bother him
11
00:00:24,198 --> 00:00:25,460
when he's out
with his friends.
12
00:00:27,592 --> 00:00:29,029
[gasps]
13
00:00:29,072 --> 00:00:31,248
On second thought,
I don't want to be impolite.
14
00:00:31,292 --> 00:00:33,555
Hey, Marty!
15
00:00:33,598 --> 00:00:35,513
Oh, uh, wow. Okay,
this is a surprise.
16
00:00:35,557 --> 00:00:37,254
What are you guys doing here?
17
00:00:37,298 --> 00:00:39,039
We're just out
for a little date night fun.
18
00:00:39,082 --> 00:00:40,866
Marty,
19
00:00:40,910 --> 00:00:43,217
aren't you gonna
introduce us?
20
00:00:43,260 --> 00:00:44,827
Oh, uh, yeah, yeah,
of course.
21
00:00:44,870 --> 00:00:47,134
Uh, this is
Dave and Gemma.
22
00:00:47,177 --> 00:00:49,005
They live next door
to my parents.
23
00:00:49,049 --> 00:00:50,006
Hi.
Hi.
24
00:00:50,050 --> 00:00:51,442
And this is
25
00:00:51,486 --> 00:00:53,053
Chloe, my girlfriend.
26
00:00:53,096 --> 00:00:54,054
Girlfriend?!
27
00:00:55,881 --> 00:00:57,144
Inside voice, Gemma.
28
00:00:57,187 --> 00:00:59,842
[squeals]
Okay, give me the deets.
29
00:00:59,885 --> 00:01:00,973
How'd you guys meet?
30
00:01:01,017 --> 00:01:03,019
[chuckles]
We, uh, we were assigned
31
00:01:03,063 --> 00:01:04,760
on a project together at work.
32
00:01:04,803 --> 00:01:07,023
Aw.Oh, oh, so you're
a scientist as well?
33
00:01:07,067 --> 00:01:09,156
I better be, or that
satellite's coming down.
34
00:01:09,199 --> 00:01:10,505
[laughs]
35
00:01:10,548 --> 00:01:12,594
Well, it was great
bumping into you guys,
36
00:01:12,637 --> 00:01:15,118
but we were actually
just about to go.
37
00:01:15,162 --> 00:01:17,033
I'm gonna run to the ladies'
room before we leave.
38
00:01:17,077 --> 00:01:18,034
Ooh! Me, too.
39
00:01:18,078 --> 00:01:19,818
Girl talk.
40
00:01:19,862 --> 00:01:21,472
[Dave laughs]
41
00:01:21,516 --> 00:01:23,257
So, I didn't know
you had a girlfriend.
42
00:01:23,300 --> 00:01:24,867
Yeah. Yeah.
[chuckles]
43
00:01:24,910 --> 00:01:26,477
You know who else
doesn't know?
44
00:01:26,521 --> 00:01:27,957
My parents.
45
00:01:28,000 --> 00:01:30,438
So could you just, uh,
keep that kind of quiet?
46
00:01:30,481 --> 00:01:32,918
Sure. But why wouldn't
you tell them?
47
00:01:32,962 --> 00:01:35,182
[chuckles]:
David.
48
00:01:35,225 --> 00:01:37,749
If my parents knew
I was dating a white girl, they would flip out.
49
00:01:37,793 --> 00:01:39,447
There's an old saying
in the black community:
50
00:01:39,490 --> 00:01:42,276
"If she can't use your comb,
you don't bring her home."
51
00:01:43,538 --> 00:01:45,192
Okay, look,
52
00:01:45,235 --> 00:01:47,019
you know your parents
way better than I do,
53
00:01:47,063 --> 00:01:48,673
but don't you think
keeping it from them
54
00:01:48,717 --> 00:01:50,719
is only gonna make it
worse if they find out?
55
00:01:50,762 --> 00:01:52,982
Yeah, you're probably right.
56
00:01:53,025 --> 00:01:54,636
So... you're
gonna tell them?
57
00:01:54,679 --> 00:01:55,680
Oh, God, no.
58
00:01:55,724 --> 00:01:57,639
No. No, no, no.
[laughs]
59
00:01:57,682 --> 00:02:00,598
Uh, but youaren't gonna
tell them either, right?
60
00:02:00,642 --> 00:02:03,297
No. Your secret
is safe with me.
61
00:02:03,340 --> 00:02:05,342
What about Gemma?
62
00:02:05,386 --> 00:02:07,518
Oh, my God, I love her.
63
00:02:07,562 --> 00:02:10,042
You guys are gonna have
the cutest babies.
64
00:02:10,086 --> 00:02:11,479
Oh.
65
00:02:12,741 --> 00:02:14,351
Ready?Yeah.
66
00:02:14,395 --> 00:02:16,527
Bye, guys.
[chuckles] Bye.
67
00:02:16,571 --> 00:02:17,528
I'll tell them tomorrow.
68
00:02:17,572 --> 00:02:18,877
Good.
69
00:02:18,921 --> 00:02:20,749
โช
70
00:02:21,750 --> 00:02:23,317
Uh, hey, guys.
71
00:02:23,360 --> 00:02:25,710
Oh, hey, baby. I didn't
know you were stopping by.
72
00:02:25,754 --> 00:02:28,148
I didn't know
men wore pink pants.
73
00:02:30,019 --> 00:02:32,456
Wearing pink doesn't
make you less of a man, Pop.
74
00:02:32,500 --> 00:02:34,806
Yeah, besides, Dad, they're
not pink, they're salmon.
75
00:02:34,850 --> 00:02:36,678
Yeah, that's not helping
your case, bro.
76
00:02:37,940 --> 00:02:39,507
Well, baby, what brings you by?
77
00:02:39,550 --> 00:02:42,205
Well, uh, there's something I
need to talk to you guys about.
78
00:02:42,249 --> 00:02:44,164
Oh, "need to talk"
is never good news.
79
00:02:44,207 --> 00:02:46,078
Either somebody pregnant
or he going to jail.
80
00:02:47,906 --> 00:02:49,343
Is everything all right, Marty?
81
00:02:49,386 --> 00:02:51,997
No, everything's fine.
In fact, everything's great.
82
00:02:52,041 --> 00:02:54,304
Oh.
Uh, I just wanted to tell you guys
83
00:02:54,348 --> 00:02:56,045
that I have a girlfriend.
84
00:02:56,088 --> 00:02:57,916
You do?
85
00:02:57,960 --> 00:02:59,614
Has she seen those pants?
86
00:03:01,355 --> 00:03:03,574
Oh, that's wonderful, baby.
87
00:03:03,618 --> 00:03:05,663
You know what? I've been praying
that you find someone.
88
00:03:05,707 --> 00:03:06,969
Yeah, man, who is she?
89
00:03:07,012 --> 00:03:10,668
Well, her name is Chloe,
and I really like her.
90
00:03:10,712 --> 00:03:12,931
So why were you nervous
to tell us that?Yeah.
91
00:03:12,975 --> 00:03:16,283
Well, uh...
92
00:03:16,326 --> 00:03:19,764
let's just say I've been
playing in the snow lately.
93
00:03:19,808 --> 00:03:21,505
[laughs loudly]
94
00:03:23,855 --> 00:03:25,596
[sighs]
95
00:03:25,640 --> 00:03:27,598
What?What? What?
96
00:03:27,642 --> 00:03:30,210
I've been sprinkling
a lot of powdered sugar
97
00:03:30,253 --> 00:03:31,863
on my French toast.
98
00:03:33,865 --> 00:03:35,606
Well, you know,
you got to watch that,
99
00:03:35,650 --> 00:03:37,956
'cause we got a lot of diabetes
run in our family.
100
00:03:38,000 --> 00:03:39,610
You got to
be careful.
101
00:03:39,654 --> 00:03:41,308
No, no. Dad, listen, um,
102
00:03:41,351 --> 00:03:44,789
I set a trap in the woods
and I caught a polar bear.
103
00:03:44,833 --> 00:03:46,704
You're dating a white girl?
104
00:03:46,748 --> 00:03:49,185
[laughs] Yes!
105
00:03:51,361 --> 00:03:52,884
Well, who cares if she's white,
106
00:03:52,928 --> 00:03:54,973
as long as Marty
likes her, right?
107
00:03:55,017 --> 00:03:57,019
I'm just trying
to protect the boy, babe.
108
00:03:57,062 --> 00:04:00,065
You know how intolerant
people can be about color.
109
00:04:00,109 --> 00:04:02,024
Oh, like you and his pink pants?
110
00:04:02,067 --> 00:04:04,679
And besides, don't we have
111
00:04:04,722 --> 00:04:06,463
enough white people
around here now?
112
00:04:06,507 --> 00:04:09,727
I mean, with the Johnsons
and now this girl,
113
00:04:09,771 --> 00:04:11,773
it's starting to feel
like Connecticut.
114
00:04:13,035 --> 00:04:15,255
Well, I, for one,
want to meet her.
115
00:04:15,298 --> 00:04:16,952
So why don't you
invite her over tomorrow night
116
00:04:16,995 --> 00:04:19,302
for Sunday dinner?Oh, I don't know, Mom.
117
00:04:19,346 --> 00:04:21,391
You know, we've only been
dating for a couple months.
118
00:04:21,435 --> 00:04:23,001
It might be a bit too soon.
119
00:04:23,045 --> 00:04:25,003
[chuckles]: Oh, maybe
I didn't make myself clear.
120
00:04:25,047 --> 00:04:26,962
She's coming over
for Sunday dinner,
121
00:04:27,005 --> 00:04:29,007
and if you're free,
you're welcome to come, too.
122
00:04:29,051 --> 00:04:30,313
Wha...
123
00:04:32,054 --> 00:04:34,056
And give your girlfriend
her pants back.
124
00:04:36,101 --> 00:04:38,016
โช Welcome to the block,
welcome to the neighborhood โช
125
00:04:38,060 --> 00:04:39,279
โช Welcome to the hood.
126
00:04:46,982 --> 00:04:49,811
I am so excited for
you to meet Chloe.
127
00:04:49,854 --> 00:04:51,029
Thank you for inviting us.
128
00:04:51,073 --> 00:04:52,596
Oh, my pleasure.
129
00:04:52,640 --> 00:04:56,121
Maybe with you guys here,
Calvin will give her a chance.
130
00:04:56,165 --> 00:04:57,775
Why would us being
here matter?
131
00:04:57,819 --> 00:05:00,474
Well, next to Dave,
maybe she won't seem so white.
132
00:05:00,517 --> 00:05:02,954
[chuckles]
133
00:05:02,998 --> 00:05:06,131
[jazz music playing]Hey, DJ Calvin,
can I make a request?
134
00:05:06,175 --> 00:05:07,394
[exhales sharply]
135
00:05:07,437 --> 00:05:09,134
No, but I can
give you one.
136
00:05:09,178 --> 00:05:10,527
Go stand over there.
137
00:05:11,789 --> 00:05:14,662
Okay, look, I know
you're not happy
138
00:05:14,705 --> 00:05:16,707
with Marty's choice,
but at least he was brave enough
139
00:05:16,751 --> 00:05:18,318
to tell you the truth.
140
00:05:18,361 --> 00:05:20,842
The truth is, is when he
comes in here with Chloe,
141
00:05:20,885 --> 00:05:22,234
the white people
in my house
142
00:05:22,278 --> 00:05:23,671
are gonna outnumber
the black people.
143
00:05:23,714 --> 00:05:26,674
[laughs]:
Wait. What?
144
00:05:26,717 --> 00:05:28,240
It'll be four and four.
145
00:05:28,284 --> 00:05:30,242
You're so white,
I count you twice.
146
00:05:33,202 --> 00:05:35,857
Your dad seems
grumpier than usual.
147
00:05:35,900 --> 00:05:37,511
That's because Marty
is challenging him
148
00:05:37,554 --> 00:05:39,382
to expand his point of view.
149
00:05:39,426 --> 00:05:40,862
What does that mean?
150
00:05:40,905 --> 00:05:43,212
Well, that means, for the
first time in a long time,
151
00:05:43,255 --> 00:05:44,387
I'm the favorite son.
152
00:05:46,563 --> 00:05:47,912
Love you, boy.
153
00:05:51,263 --> 00:05:53,178
Uh, hey, guys. We're here.
154
00:05:53,222 --> 00:05:55,877
Hey, baby.
So glad you could make it.
155
00:05:55,920 --> 00:05:57,487
So, you must be Chloe.
156
00:05:57,531 --> 00:06:00,055
I am Marty's mother, Tina.
Nice to meet you.
157
00:06:00,098 --> 00:06:01,491
It's nice to meet you, too,
Mrs. Butler.
158
00:06:01,535 --> 00:06:02,797
Here. These are for you.
159
00:06:02,840 --> 00:06:05,103
[gasps] Flowers today,
grandbabies tomorrow!
160
00:06:07,454 --> 00:06:09,281
It's good to see you
again, Chloe.
161
00:06:09,325 --> 00:06:11,501
You remember my wife,
your bathroom bestie.
162
00:06:11,545 --> 00:06:12,850
[Tina chuckles]
163
00:06:12,894 --> 00:06:13,851
Oh.
164
00:06:13,895 --> 00:06:14,852
And this is my
father, Calvin.
165
00:06:14,896 --> 00:06:16,593
Hello.
166
00:06:16,637 --> 00:06:18,421
It's nice to meet you,
Mr. Butler.
167
00:06:18,465 --> 00:06:20,031
Marty's told me a lot about you.
168
00:06:20,075 --> 00:06:21,163
Really?Mm-hmm.
169
00:06:21,206 --> 00:06:23,034
He's only told us
one thing about you.
170
00:06:24,601 --> 00:06:26,734
Dad, come on.It's okay.
171
00:06:26,777 --> 00:06:27,996
He's being funny.
172
00:06:28,039 --> 00:06:29,693
Now I see where Marty
gets his sense of humor.
173
00:06:29,737 --> 00:06:32,348
Oh, wow!
174
00:06:32,392 --> 00:06:34,176
Look at this
vinyl collection.
175
00:06:34,219 --> 00:06:35,830
Oh, you like listening
to records?
176
00:06:35,873 --> 00:06:37,875
Yeah, they just sound
so much warmer.
177
00:06:37,919 --> 00:06:41,575
Ooh, hey, uh, just a piece of
advice: don't make any requests.
178
00:06:43,664 --> 00:06:44,969
So, Chloe,
where are you from?
179
00:06:45,013 --> 00:06:46,841
Here. Born and raised
in Los Angeles.
180
00:06:46,884 --> 00:06:48,451
Mm, let me guess.
181
00:06:48,495 --> 00:06:50,235
Bel Air?
Beverly Hills?
182
00:06:50,279 --> 00:06:52,194
Malibu?
183
00:06:52,237 --> 00:06:54,326
Echo Park, actually.
184
00:06:54,370 --> 00:06:56,285
Oh, that's near
Dodger Stadium.
185
00:06:56,328 --> 00:06:57,982
Yeah! Are you a fan?
186
00:06:58,026 --> 00:07:01,682
Oh, I've been going to games
since Tommy Lasorda was skinny.
187
00:07:01,725 --> 00:07:05,468
You know, my family
has season tickets.
188
00:07:05,512 --> 00:07:08,558
Maybe you can come to a game
with Marty and me sometime.
189
00:07:08,602 --> 00:07:11,474
Season tickets?
Wh-Where are the seats?
190
00:07:11,518 --> 00:07:13,650
Field level, first base side.
191
00:07:13,694 --> 00:07:16,610
Field level.
192
00:07:16,653 --> 00:07:20,440
I have been hit in the face
by a foul ball twice.
193
00:07:20,483 --> 00:07:22,485
[chuckles]
Well, all right!
194
00:07:24,792 --> 00:07:28,491
Aw, damn. There goes
my "favorite son" position.
195
00:07:28,535 --> 00:07:30,450
Maybe youshould get
a white girlfriend.
196
00:07:36,543 --> 00:07:38,458
Where should I sit?
197
00:07:38,501 --> 00:07:40,677
Why don't you sit here
next to me,
198
00:07:40,721 --> 00:07:44,464
just like we're gonna do
at those Dodger games.
199
00:07:46,422 --> 00:07:47,945
So, I guess we're all set.
200
00:07:47,989 --> 00:07:49,817
You good over there,
Grover and Malcolm?
201
00:07:49,860 --> 00:07:51,732
Yeah, Ma!
202
00:07:52,733 --> 00:07:55,170
I'm doing great.
203
00:07:55,213 --> 00:07:57,738
When you fall, you fall hard.
204
00:08:00,436 --> 00:08:03,004
Okay, so, before we eat,
I just want to thank everyone
205
00:08:03,047 --> 00:08:05,267
for being here,
especially you, Chloe.
206
00:08:05,310 --> 00:08:06,573
CALVIN: Oh, and since
you're our guest,
207
00:08:06,616 --> 00:08:08,749
why don't you go ahead
and lead us in grace.
208
00:08:08,792 --> 00:08:11,795
Never asked me
to say grace.
209
00:08:11,839 --> 00:08:14,276
Oh. Um...
210
00:08:14,319 --> 00:08:16,017
Uh, you know, Dad,
that-that's really nice of you,
211
00:08:16,060 --> 00:08:18,759
but I think it might be a lot
of pressure to put on Chloe.
212
00:08:18,802 --> 00:08:20,369
Maybe someone else should do it.
213
00:08:20,412 --> 00:08:22,632
Love to.
Okay, let's all hold hands.
214
00:08:22,676 --> 00:08:24,808
Dave. Dave.
215
00:08:25,940 --> 00:08:27,681
Aw, don't feel
any pressure.
216
00:08:27,724 --> 00:08:29,857
God doesn't need anything fancy.
217
00:08:29,900 --> 00:08:31,685
It's not that I feel
too much pressure.
218
00:08:31,728 --> 00:08:33,774
Uh, I just think it might
be more appropriate
219
00:08:33,817 --> 00:08:34,949
if someone else did it.
220
00:08:34,992 --> 00:08:36,037
Ooh, again, all over it.
221
00:08:36,080 --> 00:08:37,299
Okay...
Dave.
222
00:08:37,342 --> 00:08:38,996
Dave, Dave, Dave.
[mouthing]
223
00:08:40,084 --> 00:08:42,565
Well, why wouldn't it
be appropriate for you?
224
00:08:42,609 --> 00:08:44,567
Well, because I don't
believe in God.
225
00:08:44,611 --> 00:08:46,177
Mm-mm.
226
00:08:52,444 --> 00:08:54,055
I see.
227
00:08:54,098 --> 00:08:57,319
And just like Jesus,
I'm risen again.
228
00:09:05,719 --> 00:09:08,896
Food's delicious,
Mrs. Butler.
229
00:09:08,939 --> 00:09:11,812
Yeah, you know, Mom,
Chloe's quite a cook, too.
230
00:09:11,855 --> 00:09:14,641
Mm, she likes the Dodgers
andshe can burn?
231
00:09:15,685 --> 00:09:17,121
She'll be burning, all right.
232
00:09:21,604 --> 00:09:24,346
Uh, so, Chloe, what kind
of scientist are you?
233
00:09:24,389 --> 00:09:25,826
I'm an astrophysicist.
234
00:09:25,869 --> 00:09:28,176
I'd say it's not
rocket science, but...
235
00:09:28,219 --> 00:09:30,004
it's basically rocket science.
236
00:09:30,047 --> 00:09:32,049
[laughing loudly]
237
00:09:33,529 --> 00:09:35,531
Girl's funny, huh?
238
00:09:35,575 --> 00:09:39,187
I would like to hear
why you don't believe in God.
239
00:09:41,450 --> 00:09:43,191
Well, it's just that,
as a scientist,
240
00:09:43,234 --> 00:09:45,149
I have to go where
the facts lead me,
241
00:09:45,193 --> 00:09:48,413
and... there's no empirical
evidence of a higher power.
242
00:09:48,457 --> 00:09:49,545
Hmm.
243
00:09:49,589 --> 00:09:51,199
Hmm.
244
00:09:51,242 --> 00:09:53,418
That's an interesting opinion.
Don't you th...?
245
00:09:53,462 --> 00:09:55,290
Y-Yeah, it sure is.
Right, Dave?
246
00:09:55,333 --> 00:09:57,335
Absolutely.
Malcolm, what do you think?
247
00:09:57,379 --> 00:09:58,728
[laughs]:
Oh, I think it's great.
248
00:10:02,123 --> 00:10:04,473
So if you got some
empirical evidence,
249
00:10:04,516 --> 00:10:06,257
would you believe?Sure.
250
00:10:06,301 --> 00:10:08,390
Oh.But I don't think
there's ever gonna be
251
00:10:08,433 --> 00:10:11,088
any evidence of an old, bearded
man who lives in the sky,
252
00:10:11,132 --> 00:10:13,134
granting wishes like it's magic.
253
00:10:19,706 --> 00:10:21,882
"Like it's magic"?
254
00:10:21,925 --> 00:10:24,536
You know what's magical
is Tina's desserts.
255
00:10:24,580 --> 00:10:26,538
TINA:
You know, baby,
256
00:10:26,582 --> 00:10:28,236
I will go get it ready.
257
00:10:28,279 --> 00:10:30,281
Marty, would you come help
me in the kitchen, please?
258
00:10:30,325 --> 00:10:31,935
You know,
Malcolm could...
259
00:10:31,979 --> 00:10:33,415
TINA:
Marty!
260
00:10:38,289 --> 00:10:41,031
That was going great till you
found out Chloe was a heathen.
261
00:10:42,337 --> 00:10:44,905
Martin Lawrence Butler.
262
00:10:46,428 --> 00:10:49,431
What are you doing with a girl
who doesn't believe in God?
263
00:10:49,474 --> 00:10:50,867
Just because she
doesn't believe in God
264
00:10:50,911 --> 00:10:52,347
doesn't mean
she's not a good person.
265
00:10:52,390 --> 00:10:53,696
I didn't say she wasn't.
266
00:10:53,740 --> 00:10:55,524
So you think she's
a good person?
267
00:10:55,567 --> 00:10:58,701
Of course I don't!
She doesn't believe in God!
268
00:10:58,745 --> 00:11:01,138
How can you be
so judgmental?
269
00:11:01,182 --> 00:11:03,097
The Bible says, "Judge not,
lest you be judged.
270
00:11:03,140 --> 00:11:05,186
Oh, whoa. Don't you
throw scripture at me, boy.
271
00:11:05,229 --> 00:11:08,189
I am your mother. And the Bible
says I can judge whoever I want.
272
00:11:08,232 --> 00:11:09,973
Tell me where it says that.
273
00:11:10,017 --> 00:11:11,714
First Corinthians, Second Tina.
274
00:11:12,846 --> 00:11:15,326
It's my favorite verse.
275
00:11:15,370 --> 00:11:17,067
See? I can't talk to you
when you're like this.
276
00:11:17,111 --> 00:11:18,852
No, no, where do you
think you're going?
277
00:11:18,895 --> 00:11:20,288
We're leaving.Oh, no.
278
00:11:20,331 --> 00:11:22,682
You're gonna stay here,
and you're gonna listen to me.
279
00:11:22,725 --> 00:11:25,032
Why, when you won't
listen to me?
280
00:11:25,075 --> 00:11:27,425
Fine. Leave.
281
00:11:27,469 --> 00:11:30,907
She wouldn't like dessert
anyway; it's angel food cake!
282
00:11:34,911 --> 00:11:37,566
Hey, Calvin, are you
changing the oil again?
283
00:11:37,609 --> 00:11:38,872
Yeah.
284
00:11:38,915 --> 00:11:40,221
Didn't you do that last week?
285
00:11:40,264 --> 00:11:42,049
Stop stalking me, Dave.
286
00:11:43,746 --> 00:11:46,227
I already got enough on my plate
with this Tina thing.
287
00:11:46,270 --> 00:11:48,229
Ooh. She's still upset
about Marty, huh?
288
00:11:48,272 --> 00:11:51,058
Yeah. And now
she's upset with me.
289
00:11:51,101 --> 00:11:52,363
Why?
290
00:11:52,407 --> 00:11:56,411
Because she thinks
I should be mad, too.
291
00:11:56,454 --> 00:11:58,892
To be honest, I'm a little
surprised you're not.
292
00:11:58,935 --> 00:12:00,720
There's nothing to be mad at.
293
00:12:00,763 --> 00:12:03,200
The boy's just having fun.
They're just dating.
294
00:12:03,244 --> 00:12:07,161
But Tina act like they're
all at the altar already.
295
00:12:07,204 --> 00:12:10,817
Well, you were upset when
you found out she was white.
296
00:12:10,860 --> 00:12:12,470
I've grown, Dave.
297
00:12:14,559 --> 00:12:16,257
I don't see black or white.
298
00:12:16,300 --> 00:12:18,302
All I see is Dodger blue.
299
00:12:20,435 --> 00:12:22,524
Well, you know me.
300
00:12:22,567 --> 00:12:25,353
I don't like sticking my nose
in other people's business.
301
00:12:27,355 --> 00:12:30,314
But if you want,
I have some advice.
302
00:12:30,358 --> 00:12:33,535
Fine. Go ahead,
get it off your chest.
303
00:12:33,578 --> 00:12:36,886
Ooh. Give me a second.
I wasn't expecting that.
304
00:12:36,930 --> 00:12:39,149
Okay.
305
00:12:39,193 --> 00:12:41,325
I discovered something
years ago with Gemma
306
00:12:41,369 --> 00:12:43,458
when we were watching
The Bachelor.
307
00:12:43,501 --> 00:12:45,808
I take it back.
I don't want to hear this.
308
00:12:45,852 --> 00:12:48,245
No, no, it's too late; train has
already left the station.
309
00:12:48,289 --> 00:12:52,597
Now, Gemma was livid when
Ben picked Ashley over Trisha.
310
00:12:52,641 --> 00:12:57,994
Oh, she was yelling at the TV,
she was beating up pillows,
311
00:12:58,038 --> 00:13:02,520
and the more I tried to calm
her down, the madder she got.
312
00:13:02,564 --> 00:13:05,828
Mad? Like I'm
getting right now?
313
00:13:05,872 --> 00:13:08,962
What I realized is that Gemma
didn't want to be calmed down,
314
00:13:09,005 --> 00:13:11,965
she wanted someone
to be mad withher.
315
00:13:12,008 --> 00:13:13,836
Okay. So what did you do?
316
00:13:13,880 --> 00:13:15,272
Well, I went ballistic.
317
00:13:16,839 --> 00:13:18,841
You know? I yelled,
I threw the remote,
318
00:13:18,885 --> 00:13:21,801
posted tirades
on all the Bachelorblogs.
319
00:13:23,193 --> 00:13:25,456
I was an animal.
320
00:13:25,500 --> 00:13:27,589
How did any of that help?
321
00:13:27,632 --> 00:13:29,896
Because once I started acting
more mad than her,
322
00:13:29,939 --> 00:13:33,334
she felt like she needed
to calm medown,
323
00:13:33,377 --> 00:13:37,033
which required
her to calm down.
324
00:13:38,687 --> 00:13:40,297
And then, Calvin, we made love.
325
00:13:40,341 --> 00:13:41,821
Okay.
326
00:13:41,864 --> 00:13:44,171
Keep me out of
your bedroom, Dave.
327
00:13:44,214 --> 00:13:47,043
Ooh. It was not in the bedroom.
328
00:13:48,740 --> 00:13:51,265
I don't care if it was
in Dodger Stadium.
329
00:13:51,308 --> 00:13:52,962
Keep it to yourself!
330
00:13:58,141 --> 00:13:59,708
Hey, baby.
331
00:13:59,751 --> 00:14:01,144
Uh, I...
332
00:14:01,188 --> 00:14:02,885
I think those pillows are clean.
333
00:14:04,582 --> 00:14:07,063
Don't "baby" me.
Where you been?
334
00:14:08,412 --> 00:14:10,414
Uh, I'll tell you
where I been.
335
00:14:10,458 --> 00:14:14,114
I been... I been
walking the streets,
336
00:14:14,157 --> 00:14:17,030
angry, thinking about
that Marty situation.
337
00:14:17,073 --> 00:14:19,075
[chuckles]:
Oh, really?
338
00:14:19,119 --> 00:14:22,035
So now you care,
Mr. Field Level Seats?
339
00:14:22,078 --> 00:14:23,601
Yeah. No, but
you're right, Tina.
340
00:14:23,645 --> 00:14:26,909
I got to admit, I was blinded
by the Dodger blue.
341
00:14:26,953 --> 00:14:30,565
But, uh, you know,
the more I think about it,
342
00:14:30,608 --> 00:14:34,438
I couldn't have got upset,
'cause if I would've got mad,
343
00:14:34,482 --> 00:14:37,572
I would've had to unleash
the beast up in here, you know what I mean?
344
00:14:37,615 --> 00:14:39,574
Well, it's about
time, Calvin. Yeah.
345
00:14:39,617 --> 00:14:41,054
And I'm mad, Tina.Uh-huh.
346
00:14:41,097 --> 00:14:43,752
I mean, I'm furious!Mm-hmm.
347
00:14:43,795 --> 00:14:46,581
[shouting gibberish]That's right!
That's right!
348
00:14:46,624 --> 00:14:48,583
Who does that boy think he is?!You're right, baby!
349
00:14:48,626 --> 00:14:50,498
You know what, I'm gonna
flip this couch right now!
350
00:14:50,541 --> 00:14:51,803
Wait, what?
351
00:14:51,847 --> 00:14:53,283
Baby, no, no, no, no.
352
00:14:53,327 --> 00:14:55,677
Whew! That couch a little heavy.
Let me start right here.
353
00:14:55,720 --> 00:14:56,983
[yells]
No!
354
00:14:57,026 --> 00:14:58,419
Oh, no, no! Calvin!
355
00:14:58,462 --> 00:14:59,811
Wait a minute.
Don't-don't-don't...
356
00:14:59,855 --> 00:15:01,552
I can't, baby.
You know what I'm saying?
357
00:15:01,596 --> 00:15:03,424
They done unleashed
the kraken up in here, as far as I'm concerned!
358
00:15:03,467 --> 00:15:05,600
Wait, wait, wait.[yelling wildly]
359
00:15:05,643 --> 00:15:07,254
Don't. Wait.
Calvin, Calvin, Calvin!
360
00:15:07,297 --> 00:15:09,865
Wait a minute,
just calm down, calm down.
361
00:15:09,909 --> 00:15:12,433
It's gonna be okay.
I mean, we trippin'.You know what?
362
00:15:12,476 --> 00:15:13,956
You-you don't know
what it's like.
363
00:15:14,000 --> 00:15:15,958
To have all this
pent-up anger. I know, baby.
364
00:15:16,002 --> 00:15:17,699
You don't know
what to do with it.
365
00:15:17,742 --> 00:15:18,961
Oh! Ooh!Oh!
366
00:15:19,005 --> 00:15:22,008
Oh, see, baby?
Just, oh, just sit down.
367
00:15:22,051 --> 00:15:23,748
Sit down, sit down.
Come on, sit down.[groans] Yeah.
368
00:15:23,792 --> 00:15:25,315
Sit down.
[panting]: Oh, man, I...
369
00:15:25,359 --> 00:15:27,230
You got to forgive
me, girl, I...
370
00:15:27,274 --> 00:15:29,145
I lost my mind
there for a second.
371
00:15:29,189 --> 00:15:30,538
I know. I know.Yeah?
372
00:15:30,581 --> 00:15:31,756
Kids'll make you do that.
373
00:15:31,800 --> 00:15:32,975
How you doing?Terrible.
374
00:15:33,019 --> 00:15:34,281
You all right?I'm okay.
375
00:15:34,324 --> 00:15:35,543
I'm okay, baby.
376
00:15:35,586 --> 00:15:38,763
I think we both
need to relax. Yeah.
377
00:15:38,807 --> 00:15:41,375
You know?I mean, you know, the
fact that we was...
378
00:15:41,418 --> 00:15:43,594
we was both upset
about the same thing...
379
00:15:43,638 --> 00:15:47,120
Same thing. It's our baby.
It's our baby.You know, you know...
380
00:15:47,163 --> 00:15:49,644
You know, but now, you
know, we're just chillin'.
381
00:15:49,687 --> 00:15:51,820
Yeah, we chillin', baby.You know what
I mean? Yeah.
382
00:16:01,656 --> 00:16:05,312
Calvin, why are you
touching my butt?
383
00:16:05,355 --> 00:16:07,314
Oh, babe, I just...
384
00:16:07,357 --> 00:16:09,359
I thought since we
weren't angry anymore,
385
00:16:09,403 --> 00:16:12,710
we'd just get back
to our lovin' selves.
386
00:16:12,754 --> 00:16:14,016
Hmm?
387
00:16:14,060 --> 00:16:15,496
What?
388
00:16:15,539 --> 00:16:18,890
Were you pretending to be mad
just to get you some?
389
00:16:18,934 --> 00:16:21,545
What?! No!
390
00:16:21,589 --> 00:16:24,505
I cannot believe you.
Here I'm about to lose my baby,
391
00:16:24,548 --> 00:16:26,463
and you're trying
to make another one?
392
00:16:26,507 --> 00:16:29,031
Look, Tina...Oh, my God.
393
00:16:29,075 --> 00:16:32,382
I was just trying to get you
to calm down, all right?Mm, mm.
394
00:16:32,426 --> 00:16:34,645
'Cause on The Bachelor,
Dave has said, what...What?
395
00:16:34,689 --> 00:16:37,518
Basically what happens
on The Bachelor... Dave?
396
00:16:37,561 --> 00:16:40,173
Oh, hell no!Oh, Tina...
397
00:16:40,216 --> 00:16:43,219
You-you-you...Tina, don't you...
Tina, you don't...
398
00:16:43,263 --> 00:16:45,526
You...
Come on, now, you know...
399
00:16:45,569 --> 00:16:48,181
You know, I'm not dealing
with this no more. What?
400
00:16:48,224 --> 00:16:50,748
Tina, you need to stop--
Come on, now, quit playing.
401
00:16:52,402 --> 00:16:53,838
[door closes]
402
00:16:53,882 --> 00:16:55,710
Whew.
403
00:16:55,753 --> 00:16:57,929
That didn't go like I thought.
404
00:17:03,239 --> 00:17:04,719
Whoa!
405
00:17:06,982 --> 00:17:08,592
How did you get in here?
406
00:17:08,636 --> 00:17:10,072
Bobby pin.
407
00:17:10,116 --> 00:17:12,118
I wasn't always your mother.
408
00:17:14,163 --> 00:17:16,644
Sit down.
We need to talk.
409
00:17:16,687 --> 00:17:17,775
If you're here to tell me
410
00:17:17,819 --> 00:17:18,776
to break up with Chloe,
you're too late.
411
00:17:18,820 --> 00:17:22,084
We already did.
412
00:17:22,128 --> 00:17:24,130
[mouthing]
413
00:17:29,439 --> 00:17:31,441
Oh, baby, you okay?
414
00:17:31,485 --> 00:17:33,095
Don't pretend like
you're not happy.
415
00:17:34,749 --> 00:17:36,968
I heard your bracelets jingling
while you were celebrating.
416
00:17:39,841 --> 00:17:42,104
Okay, fine. I'm happy.
417
00:17:42,148 --> 00:17:44,324
I was just worried about
you being with someone
418
00:17:44,367 --> 00:17:45,977
who doesn't believe in God.
419
00:17:46,021 --> 00:17:48,763
What does it matter if she
doesn't as long as I do?
420
00:17:48,806 --> 00:17:51,853
[sighs]
So you do still believe in God?
421
00:17:51,896 --> 00:17:53,376
Of course I do.
422
00:17:53,420 --> 00:17:55,944
[sighs]
But my relationship to God is personal to me.
423
00:17:55,987 --> 00:17:57,424
It doesn't have to be
the same as Chloe's,
424
00:17:57,467 --> 00:17:58,425
or yours.
425
00:17:58,468 --> 00:18:00,209
Listen, baby,
426
00:18:00,253 --> 00:18:03,952
I need you to understand me
right now.
427
00:18:03,995 --> 00:18:07,347
Faith has been
so important in my life.
428
00:18:07,390 --> 00:18:11,133
I mean, it's gotten me
through my mother passing,
429
00:18:11,177 --> 00:18:15,268
it got me through raising
two black sons in Los Angeles,
430
00:18:15,311 --> 00:18:17,531
and more importantly,
431
00:18:17,574 --> 00:18:20,403
it's still getting me through
being married to your father.
432
00:18:20,447 --> 00:18:24,799
Well, if Chloe wanted empirical
evidence of God, there it is.
433
00:18:27,193 --> 00:18:30,413
I just want to make sure that
you have the same foundation
434
00:18:30,457 --> 00:18:32,720
to build your life upon,
you know?
435
00:18:32,763 --> 00:18:34,069
Of course I do.
436
00:18:34,113 --> 00:18:35,418
What do you think
got me through
437
00:18:35,462 --> 00:18:37,768
being bullied in high school
for being a nerd?
438
00:18:37,812 --> 00:18:40,380
What do you think got me
through four years of college
439
00:18:40,423 --> 00:18:41,946
and two years
of graduate school?
440
00:18:41,990 --> 00:18:43,992
What do you think
got me through being scared
441
00:18:44,035 --> 00:18:45,950
when I moved out on my own?
442
00:18:45,994 --> 00:18:49,476
Marty, I'm just worried.
443
00:18:49,519 --> 00:18:51,739
You're my baby.
444
00:18:51,782 --> 00:18:54,307
I know, Mama.
445
00:18:54,350 --> 00:18:57,614
But you raised me my whole life
to have faith.
446
00:18:57,658 --> 00:19:01,531
Now you need to have faith
that you did your job.
447
00:19:03,054 --> 00:19:04,882
[laughs]
448
00:19:04,926 --> 00:19:06,710
Mm!
449
00:19:07,755 --> 00:19:09,713
[sighs]
450
00:19:09,757 --> 00:19:12,107
So, what happened
with you and Chloe?
451
00:19:12,151 --> 00:19:15,589
Ah. Well, we realized we
were better as friends.
452
00:19:15,632 --> 00:19:18,896
Wait, wait, wait. So...
you weren't really that serious?
453
00:19:20,071 --> 00:19:23,336
Well, why would you
bring her home?!
454
00:19:23,379 --> 00:19:24,859
Because you made me!
455
00:19:24,902 --> 00:19:26,208
Well, boy,
you're grown now.
456
00:19:26,252 --> 00:19:28,732
You got to learn
to start saying no to me.
457
00:19:40,527 --> 00:19:43,138
Calvin, you seem mad.
Are you okay?
458
00:19:43,182 --> 00:19:44,705
[sighs] No.
459
00:19:44,748 --> 00:19:46,794
Marty and Chloe broke up.
460
00:19:46,837 --> 00:19:49,013
Oh, no! Poor Marty.
461
00:19:49,057 --> 00:19:51,407
Marty? What about poor me?
462
00:19:52,321 --> 00:19:54,149
I just lost field level seats.
463
00:19:54,193 --> 00:19:55,977
Those come with a parking pass.
464
00:19:56,020 --> 00:19:59,720
You know what, Calvin?
You're right.
465
00:19:59,763 --> 00:20:01,287
I liked that girl.
466
00:20:01,330 --> 00:20:03,289
I thought they were
gonna have pretty babies!
467
00:20:03,332 --> 00:20:04,290
Okay...
468
00:20:04,333 --> 00:20:06,988
Whoa, Gem-Gemma?
469
00:20:07,031 --> 00:20:09,164
You know, I just raked those.
470
00:20:09,208 --> 00:20:12,298
I can't help it, okay?
I'm-I'm livid!
471
00:20:12,341 --> 00:20:13,690
My blood is boiling!
472
00:20:15,301 --> 00:20:18,086
She broke our hearts!
That girl needs to know,
473
00:20:18,129 --> 00:20:20,741
when you hurt a Butler,
you hurt a Johnson!
474
00:20:20,784 --> 00:20:22,743
Okay, whoa, Gemma, calm down!
475
00:20:24,701 --> 00:20:26,964
Don't tell me
to calm down, Calvin!
476
00:20:29,097 --> 00:20:31,882
Gemma, let it go.
There'll be other girls.
477
00:20:31,926 --> 00:20:33,362
[sighs]
478
00:20:33,406 --> 00:20:34,711
Okay.
479
00:20:34,755 --> 00:20:36,670
Okay, yeah.
Oh, you're right.
480
00:20:36,713 --> 00:20:39,063
You're right.
I'm-I'm sorry. I'm sorry.
481
00:20:39,107 --> 00:20:41,805
Grover, come here.
Let's go inside. Sorry.
482
00:20:42,893 --> 00:20:44,068
[sighs]
483
00:20:44,112 --> 00:20:45,418
Wow, Mom.
484
00:20:45,461 --> 00:20:47,376
You were really angry.
485
00:20:47,420 --> 00:20:50,074
No, sweetie, I was just
helping Mr. Calvin calm down.
486
00:20:50,118 --> 00:20:51,685
It's a little trick I use
487
00:20:51,728 --> 00:20:54,949
when your dad freaks out
over The Bachelor.
488
00:20:59,083 --> 00:21:03,044
Captioning sponsored by
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489
00:21:03,087 --> 00:21:04,132
Captioned by
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490
00:21:04,182 --> 00:21:08,732
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