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1
00:00:25,615 --> 00:00:28,797
- Previously on No Tomorrow...
- You two are seeing each other, too?
2
00:00:29,831 --> 00:00:34,210
I subscribe to the notion
of ethical non-monogamy.
3
00:00:34,240 --> 00:00:36,698
He's not as safe and vanilla
as your previous boyfriends,
4
00:00:36,728 --> 00:00:38,428
and that's a good thing.
5
00:00:38,748 --> 00:00:40,110
I've never dated casually.
6
00:00:40,140 --> 00:00:41,513
You know, it's really
something I should try.
7
00:00:41,543 --> 00:00:42,552
- You know?
- Yeah.
8
00:00:42,582 --> 00:00:44,547
- I added some dating apps.
- (Wolf whistle)
9
00:00:44,548 --> 00:00:45,963
Deirdre whispered in my ear
10
00:00:45,993 --> 00:00:47,502
and something happened.
11
00:00:47,532 --> 00:00:50,300
- Are you into Deirdre?
- I have an Internet girlfriend.
12
00:00:50,330 --> 00:00:51,477
Who you've never actually met.
13
00:00:51,478 --> 00:00:53,578
You want to have some real fun?!
14
00:00:55,211 --> 00:00:57,055
I can't do this.
15
00:00:57,085 --> 00:00:59,745
_
16
00:01:03,498 --> 00:01:05,494
17
00:01:08,245 --> 00:01:09,439
- You ready?
- Yeah...
18
00:01:09,440 --> 00:01:10,439
(Grunts)
19
00:01:10,440 --> 00:01:11,790
(Muffled): Ready.
20
00:01:11,907 --> 00:01:12,906
Okay.
21
00:01:12,907 --> 00:01:14,877
Okay, on the count of three.
22
00:01:14,878 --> 00:01:16,831
Three, two...
23
00:01:18,840 --> 00:01:20,885
(Squealing)
24
00:01:20,886 --> 00:01:22,607
(Laughing)
25
00:01:24,873 --> 00:01:25,910
(Screams)
26
00:01:25,911 --> 00:01:27,264
(Gasps)
27
00:01:27,294 --> 00:01:29,427
_
28
00:01:29,457 --> 00:01:30,914
(Whooping)
29
00:01:30,915 --> 00:01:32,322
(Whoops)
30
00:01:32,788 --> 00:01:33,788
Whoo-hoo!
31
00:01:33,818 --> 00:01:37,305
= synced and corrected by Shahrazade =
... www.addic7ed.com ...
32
00:01:37,335 --> 00:01:39,032
So, what's next?
33
00:01:39,532 --> 00:01:40,946
Mm...
34
00:01:42,902 --> 00:01:44,901
Number 36, spend the
night in a blanket fort.
35
00:01:44,902 --> 00:01:47,855
You know, my mom always
worried that I'd suffocate.
36
00:01:47,885 --> 00:01:51,213
As much as I would love to
cross off number 544 on my list,
37
00:01:51,243 --> 00:01:52,889
which is, have sex in a blanket fort,
38
00:01:52,890 --> 00:01:56,309
I can't help but notice you
keep on skipping over number 17.
39
00:01:56,339 --> 00:01:59,860
- Oh, Francis Fernberger.
- _
40
00:01:59,861 --> 00:02:01,709
We called her "Fern."
41
00:02:03,301 --> 00:02:05,464
(Sighs) And I think I ruined her life.
42
00:02:05,494 --> 00:02:06,885
Ah.
43
00:02:06,886 --> 00:02:09,839
Yeah, regrets are the hardest ones.
44
00:02:09,840 --> 00:02:11,290
I'll tell you what.
45
00:02:11,471 --> 00:02:13,635
You tackle number 17,
46
00:02:13,665 --> 00:02:16,100
and I will tackle one of my hard ones.
47
00:02:16,130 --> 00:02:18,238
_
48
00:02:18,497 --> 00:02:19,553
- Yeah?
- Yeah.
49
00:02:19,583 --> 00:02:21,581
So, what happened
with Fernie Fernberger?
50
00:02:21,611 --> 00:02:25,253
Well, we were best
friends in high school.
51
00:02:25,702 --> 00:02:28,618
Until the day before color
guard co-captain tryouts.
52
00:02:28,619 --> 00:02:30,627
-
I get knocked down...
- Five, six, seven, eight.
53
00:02:30,628 --> 00:02:32,469
EVIE: Little pump, little pump.
54
00:02:32,499 --> 00:02:34,631
And five, six, seven, eight.
55
00:02:34,632 --> 00:02:36,635
One, two, three, four,
56
00:02:36,636 --> 00:02:38,593
behind, circle, down.
57
00:02:38,594 --> 00:02:40,593
Grab one, down two,
58
00:02:40,594 --> 00:02:43,900
down back, circle, circle, circle...
59
00:02:43,930 --> 00:02:46,909
That's how you do Biscuits and Gravy!
60
00:02:46,939 --> 00:02:48,392
(Whoops)
61
00:02:48,422 --> 00:02:50,922
You grew a lot this
summer, but it still works.
62
00:02:50,952 --> 00:02:52,993
Gives us two levels of flags.
63
00:02:52,994 --> 00:02:54,571
Can you imagine, Fern?
64
00:02:54,601 --> 00:02:57,014
By this time tomorrow, we could
be color guard co-captains!
65
00:02:57,015 --> 00:02:58,018
Ooh...
66
00:02:58,019 --> 00:03:00,027
- We got this.
- (Laughs)
67
00:03:00,621 --> 00:03:01,972
Oh.
68
00:03:01,973 --> 00:03:04,409
Made you a special copy of our music.
69
00:03:04,439 --> 00:03:06,018
Thank you!
70
00:03:06,019 --> 00:03:07,136
(Music stops abruptly)
71
00:03:07,698 --> 00:03:08,997
FERN: Turds.
72
00:03:08,998 --> 00:03:10,990
The volleyball Barbies.
73
00:03:15,002 --> 00:03:18,735
Oh, they think they're
so cool just because...
74
00:03:18,765 --> 00:03:19,789
(Whispers): they're so cool.
75
00:03:19,790 --> 00:03:21,618
You, string bean.
76
00:03:21,648 --> 00:03:22,639
Me?
77
00:03:22,640 --> 00:03:23,639
You play volleyball?
78
00:03:23,640 --> 00:03:25,467
I mean, I have.
79
00:03:25,497 --> 00:03:27,797
I think you could be our new spiker.
80
00:03:29,407 --> 00:03:31,579
Tryouts. Now.
81
00:03:34,661 --> 00:03:36,639
(Whispering)
82
00:03:36,640 --> 00:03:37,702
83
00:03:46,895 --> 00:03:52,640
All that I love in a moment is gone
84
00:03:52,670 --> 00:03:55,304
I'm breaking...
85
00:03:55,334 --> 00:03:57,639
Fern never became a co-captain.
86
00:03:57,640 --> 00:03:59,639
And without me, she was just another...
87
00:03:59,640 --> 00:04:03,643
social leper in bright
blue tights waving a flag.
88
00:04:03,644 --> 00:04:05,977
That's why you need to
do number 17 right now.
89
00:04:06,007 --> 00:04:07,664
Time is too precious for regrets.
90
00:04:07,665 --> 00:04:08,924
Okay, well, then what about you?
91
00:04:08,954 --> 00:04:11,145
I mean, what do you want to make right?
92
00:04:11,175 --> 00:04:12,245
Um...
93
00:04:12,275 --> 00:04:13,264
- (Phone chimes)
- I'm starting to regr...
94
00:04:13,294 --> 00:04:14,919
Sorry, that's Heartster,
95
00:04:14,949 --> 00:04:16,639
one of the dating
apps Kareema installed.
96
00:04:16,640 --> 00:04:17,802
Heartster's blowing up.
97
00:04:17,832 --> 00:04:18,856
- (Phone chimes)
- (Laughs)
98
00:04:18,857 --> 00:04:20,078
- _
- Well, actually, no,
99
00:04:20,108 --> 00:04:21,043
- that one's CutieCall.
- Uh-huh.
100
00:04:21,073 --> 00:04:22,777
Or maybe it's TrueSoulMate.
101
00:04:22,807 --> 00:04:23,806
I can't keep track.
102
00:04:23,807 --> 00:04:25,098
- (Phone chimes)
- _
103
00:04:25,128 --> 00:04:26,856
I'll stash it, though. Um...
104
00:04:26,857 --> 00:04:28,782
Okay, go. Your regret.
105
00:04:28,812 --> 00:04:31,144
_
106
00:04:32,636 --> 00:04:33,929
Ah...
107
00:04:37,774 --> 00:04:39,789
- I stole my friend's
- _
108
00:04:39,790 --> 00:04:41,200
signed Frank Thomas rookie baseball card
109
00:04:41,230 --> 00:04:43,180
the summer after fifth grade.
110
00:04:43,790 --> 00:04:45,806
And then I pawned it.
111
00:04:46,090 --> 00:04:47,129
To buy nunchucks.
112
00:04:47,159 --> 00:04:48,545
(Chuckles): Nunchucks?
113
00:04:48,575 --> 00:04:50,427
It was fifth grade. I still have them.
114
00:04:50,457 --> 00:04:52,822
So that's it? Just
return a baseball card?
115
00:04:52,823 --> 00:04:54,144
(Sighs)
116
00:04:54,174 --> 00:04:55,789
It's a very, very, very rare...
117
00:04:55,790 --> 00:04:56,843
connection that we have.
118
00:04:56,844 --> 00:04:59,328
And now I'm starting to
regret encouraging her
119
00:04:59,358 --> 00:05:01,311
to explore ethical
non-monogamy in the first place.
120
00:05:01,341 --> 00:05:03,243
But I'd be a hypocrite
to say that, because
121
00:05:03,273 --> 00:05:05,814
it's directly contradicting
my own philosophy.
122
00:05:05,844 --> 00:05:07,008
You're being a wuss.
123
00:05:07,038 --> 00:05:08,277
I am not being a wuss.
124
00:05:08,307 --> 00:05:10,293
- You're being a wuss.
- I'm not being a wuss.
125
00:05:10,294 --> 00:05:11,783
You're being a wuss, man.
126
00:05:11,813 --> 00:05:13,314
And...
127
00:05:13,779 --> 00:05:14,779
I get it.
128
00:05:15,166 --> 00:05:18,297
It's risky business
caring deeply for someone.
129
00:05:18,298 --> 00:05:21,698
I can't tie her down when
she's just starting to explore.
130
00:05:21,728 --> 00:05:24,335
You can't just sit back like an asshat
131
00:05:24,336 --> 00:05:26,277
and watch her date other guys if it's,
132
00:05:26,278 --> 00:05:27,604
if it's killing you.
133
00:05:27,634 --> 00:05:29,243
Sure I can.
134
00:05:29,244 --> 00:05:30,800
Her journey
135
00:05:31,128 --> 00:05:32,306
is her journey.
136
00:05:32,307 --> 00:05:34,301
Love doesn't work like that, my friend.
137
00:05:34,302 --> 00:05:36,251
It'll break your heart, steal your car
138
00:05:36,252 --> 00:05:37,946
and kick you in the beans.
139
00:05:37,976 --> 00:05:40,071
HANK: Mocha chocolate latte
with whipped cream.
140
00:05:40,101 --> 00:05:42,851
Thank you, Hank.
Please place it on my desk.
141
00:05:48,373 --> 00:05:50,301
One more thing.
142
00:05:50,302 --> 00:05:53,248
I can't seem to find my sticky notes.
143
00:05:55,850 --> 00:05:57,318
Found 'em.
144
00:05:57,319 --> 00:05:59,627
You always pick out
such beautiful colors.
145
00:05:59,657 --> 00:06:02,297
I like lavender the best. It's so vivid.
146
00:06:02,298 --> 00:06:05,314
So, what's on your social
calendar this evening?
147
00:06:05,315 --> 00:06:06,894
Practicing holding my breath.
148
00:06:06,924 --> 00:06:08,630
In case of a chemical attack.
149
00:06:08,660 --> 00:06:09,884
Oh, sounds fun.
150
00:06:09,914 --> 00:06:11,453
Know what else is fun?
151
00:06:12,321 --> 00:06:15,240
(In slow motion): Salsa dancing.
152
00:06:17,080 --> 00:06:18,302
(Exhales)
153
00:06:23,355 --> 00:06:25,318
EVIE: Lavender's a good color on you.
154
00:06:25,319 --> 00:06:27,239
- True.
- Hey, favor?
155
00:06:27,240 --> 00:06:28,306
Not really my thing.
156
00:06:28,307 --> 00:06:30,297
I need help finding a
friend from high school...
157
00:06:30,298 --> 00:06:32,306
Francis "Fern" Fernberger.
158
00:06:32,307 --> 00:06:34,314
She's a ghost on social media.
159
00:06:34,315 --> 00:06:35,613
Try Google.
160
00:06:35,643 --> 00:06:36,830
I get a thousand pages
161
00:06:36,860 --> 00:06:38,306
for a veggie restaurant chain,
162
00:06:38,307 --> 00:06:39,755
Fernburgers.
163
00:06:39,785 --> 00:06:42,239
So you want me to see if she's
ordered anything from Cybermart?
164
00:06:42,240 --> 00:06:43,873
Ugh. Fine, I'll do it.
165
00:06:43,903 --> 00:06:46,264
But only because it's
against company policy.
166
00:06:46,265 --> 00:06:47,298
- (Kareema typing)
- (Phone chimes)
167
00:06:47,328 --> 00:06:48,828
Found Your SoulMate!
168
00:06:49,264 --> 00:06:50,297
So how's the prowl?
169
00:06:50,298 --> 00:06:53,285
Oh, it is a dude buffet.
170
00:06:53,286 --> 00:06:56,569
Outdoorsy guys, bankers, bikers, gamers,
171
00:06:56,599 --> 00:06:59,264
one guy who makes his own cheese.
172
00:06:59,265 --> 00:07:03,285
You know, all these
acronyms... ISO, LTR, DTF...
173
00:07:03,286 --> 00:07:04,869
which I figure is Downtown Friend...
174
00:07:04,899 --> 00:07:06,558
- Something like that.
- (Computer beeps)
175
00:07:06,588 --> 00:07:07,909
Oh, found your Fernberger.
176
00:07:07,939 --> 00:07:09,759
She is a Cybermart customer.
177
00:07:09,789 --> 00:07:13,239
- Tell me everything.
- Um, it's totally confidential, so...
178
00:07:13,269 --> 00:07:15,019
what do you want to know?
179
00:07:15,148 --> 00:07:17,797
What did... what did she last order?
180
00:07:18,344 --> 00:07:19,982
Let's see.
181
00:07:20,012 --> 00:07:23,740
Oh, 400 pounds of
Hungry Whiskers Cat Food.
182
00:07:23,770 --> 00:07:25,289
I knew it.
183
00:07:25,290 --> 00:07:26,963
Crazy cat lady.
184
00:07:27,221 --> 00:07:28,227
(Sighs)
185
00:07:28,257 --> 00:07:30,297
Her life is a clich?
and it's all my fault.
186
00:07:30,298 --> 00:07:31,479
I'm gonna go to the bathroom.
187
00:07:31,509 --> 00:07:32,996
And by bathroom, I mean smoke a joint.
188
00:07:33,026 --> 00:07:34,910
And If I accidentally
keep your friend's info up,
189
00:07:34,940 --> 00:07:37,285
I can't prevent you from
accidentally seeing it.
190
00:07:37,286 --> 00:07:39,244
- Thank you.
- No problem.
191
00:07:41,575 --> 00:07:43,102
I'm tellin' you, T-Cakes,
192
00:07:43,132 --> 00:07:45,089
Douglas is gettin' vibes.
193
00:07:45,090 --> 00:07:46,712
Deirdre's majorly into us.
194
00:07:46,742 --> 00:07:48,602
- Uh, Douglas?
- My manhood.
195
00:07:48,632 --> 00:07:49,631
It's a family name.
196
00:07:49,632 --> 00:07:50,956
She knows when she whispers,
197
00:07:50,986 --> 00:07:52,818
it drives him loco.
198
00:07:52,848 --> 00:07:55,572
She's playin' some sort of
sadistic sex game with us.
199
00:07:55,573 --> 00:07:56,711
It can't happen.
200
00:07:56,741 --> 00:07:57,943
I mean, I'm her assistant.
201
00:07:57,973 --> 00:08:00,364
And plus, I'm in a very
serious relationship
202
00:08:00,394 --> 00:08:01,734
with my Internet girlfriend.
203
00:08:01,764 --> 00:08:02,997
Who may not exist.
204
00:08:03,027 --> 00:08:06,066
@WinnieCooper534 is real!
205
00:08:06,096 --> 00:08:09,356
And I've been catfished
enough times to know.
206
00:08:09,357 --> 00:08:10,957
This does not smell like catfish.
207
00:08:10,987 --> 00:08:12,939
You know, maybe this
whole Deirdre situation
208
00:08:12,969 --> 00:08:16,558
is a sign that you and, uh, "Winnie"
209
00:08:16,588 --> 00:08:19,617
need to upgrade your
relationship to IRL.
210
00:08:20,048 --> 00:08:22,221
- You're right. It's time.
- Yeah.
211
00:08:22,251 --> 00:08:23,735
Luckily, we have procedures
212
00:08:23,765 --> 00:08:26,086
- already in place.
- _
213
00:08:29,770 --> 00:08:31,665
You okay? You're
grabbing your back and...
214
00:08:31,695 --> 00:08:33,205
Yeah, um...
215
00:08:33,567 --> 00:08:35,404
it's Bianca.
216
00:08:35,434 --> 00:08:37,670
- Mm. Purple hair?
- Purple hair. Wrestling.
217
00:08:37,700 --> 00:08:40,478
She's into something
called "sex combat."
218
00:08:40,508 --> 00:08:43,952
Whoa...
219
00:08:44,289 --> 00:08:45,977
no...
220
00:08:45,978 --> 00:08:49,269
no, you need to be
careful with that, T-Zone.
221
00:08:49,924 --> 00:08:51,989
(Whispering): Sh-She
punched me in the pe...
222
00:08:51,990 --> 00:08:53,951
I didn't hear you. Can you speak up?
223
00:08:53,952 --> 00:08:56,177
- Punched me in the...
- What?
224
00:08:56,207 --> 00:08:58,685
- She punched me in the penis!
- She punched you in the penis?
225
00:08:58,715 --> 00:09:00,108
Shh...
226
00:09:00,436 --> 00:09:01,939
Did it hurt?
227
00:09:01,940 --> 00:09:02,947
Yeah.
228
00:09:02,948 --> 00:09:03,956
Was it, like, a straight...
229
00:09:03,957 --> 00:09:05,348
did she jab it, or was it, like,
230
00:09:05,378 --> 00:09:06,389
a left hook, or...
231
00:09:06,390 --> 00:09:07,669
It's har... I was fast asleep.
232
00:09:07,699 --> 00:09:09,623
- I just woke up in pain.
- Oh...
233
00:09:09,653 --> 00:09:11,356
Anyway, that's why I'm filling out
234
00:09:11,357 --> 00:09:12,397
this TrueSoulMate app.
235
00:09:12,398 --> 00:09:13,682
- Oh.
- Mm.
236
00:09:13,712 --> 00:09:15,208
Instead of matching you
with a bunch of randoms,
237
00:09:15,238 --> 00:09:17,414
it just finds "the one."
238
00:09:17,415 --> 00:09:19,377
For you.
239
00:09:19,378 --> 00:09:21,356
All you got to do is upload a photo.
240
00:09:21,357 --> 00:09:22,557
(Phone chimes)
241
00:09:24,318 --> 00:09:25,983
Just like that, I'm back on the market.
242
00:09:26,013 --> 00:09:27,381
(Phone vibrates)
243
00:09:27,382 --> 00:09:30,247
Ah. And I got a hot date.
244
00:09:30,277 --> 00:09:31,811
Oh!
245
00:09:31,841 --> 00:09:34,381
"Affirmative. Meeting protocol engaged."
246
00:09:34,382 --> 00:09:35,652
Yeah!
247
00:09:35,682 --> 00:09:37,732
- That's hot.
- Yeah, that is hot.
248
00:09:37,762 --> 00:09:39,882
- Super hot.
- Yeah, we're hot.
249
00:09:40,710 --> 00:09:42,385
I'm standing outside Fern's place
250
00:09:42,386 --> 00:09:43,401
and you know what, I'm really starting
251
00:09:43,402 --> 00:09:44,920
to rethink this whole thing.
252
00:09:44,950 --> 00:09:47,192
Why don't I just do
something else on my list?
253
00:09:47,222 --> 00:09:48,343
There's so much.
254
00:09:48,344 --> 00:09:50,389
Because we both need
to confront our regrets
255
00:09:50,390 --> 00:09:51,819
while we still have the chance.
256
00:09:51,849 --> 00:09:53,401
It's too much. You know, once I see her,
257
00:09:53,402 --> 00:09:55,109
I'm gonna have to own the fact
258
00:09:55,139 --> 00:09:56,368
that I turned her into
259
00:09:56,369 --> 00:09:57,397
the type of person who
has a Kitty Playground sign
260
00:09:57,398 --> 00:09:58,397
on her front door.
261
00:09:58,398 --> 00:10:01,294
- Evie. You can do this.
- I'm bailing.
262
00:10:03,183 --> 00:10:04,833
WOMAN: Evie Covington?!
263
00:10:06,352 --> 00:10:09,419
Hey... Fern.
264
00:10:17,444 --> 00:10:19,193
What are you doing here?
265
00:10:19,223 --> 00:10:21,990
I... just looked you up.
266
00:10:21,991 --> 00:10:24,011
I... wanted to say hi.
267
00:10:24,012 --> 00:10:26,999
Hi. Come here, let
me have a look at you.
268
00:10:29,070 --> 00:10:32,217
I mean... still amazing as ever.
269
00:10:32,247 --> 00:10:34,473
You... too.
270
00:10:34,852 --> 00:10:35,969
Do you live here?
271
00:10:35,970 --> 00:10:37,290
I work here.
272
00:10:37,320 --> 00:10:39,302
Yeah, I-I started Best
Pals Animal Sanctuary
273
00:10:39,303 --> 00:10:40,492
after grad school.
274
00:10:40,522 --> 00:10:42,040
Oh.
275
00:10:42,070 --> 00:10:43,098
It's so fulfilling.
276
00:10:43,099 --> 00:10:44,111
Some days I wonder
277
00:10:44,112 --> 00:10:45,650
- who is rescuing whom.
- (Laughs)
278
00:10:45,680 --> 00:10:47,386
Anyway, it is so great to see you.
279
00:10:47,416 --> 00:10:49,636
Come on in, let's catch up.
280
00:10:49,666 --> 00:10:52,452
Best Pals started as a small shelter
281
00:10:52,453 --> 00:10:54,440
dedicated to neglected cats.
282
00:10:54,441 --> 00:10:56,040
You probably saw the throwback
283
00:10:56,070 --> 00:10:57,444
Kitty Playground sign on the door.
284
00:10:57,445 --> 00:10:59,906
Oh, I... no, I didn't catch that, no.
285
00:10:59,936 --> 00:11:01,398
Over the years, we've expanded
286
00:11:01,399 --> 00:11:03,044
our shelters to 15 countries.
287
00:11:03,074 --> 00:11:04,407
We now rescue
288
00:11:04,408 --> 00:11:06,961
just about every kind
of animal in need of love
289
00:11:06,991 --> 00:11:09,465
and nurturing and antibiotics.
290
00:11:10,216 --> 00:11:11,969
Like Rosie.
291
00:11:11,999 --> 00:11:14,085
Oh!
292
00:11:14,115 --> 00:11:16,402
Hi.
293
00:11:16,403 --> 00:11:19,889
Her mom was rescued
from a flood in Uruguay.
294
00:11:19,919 --> 00:11:21,444
- Wow.
- Yeah.
295
00:11:21,445 --> 00:11:23,444
I never swam so hard in my life.
296
00:11:23,445 --> 00:11:24,992
(Both laugh)
297
00:11:25,022 --> 00:11:26,712
Oh, well...
298
00:11:27,212 --> 00:11:30,982
I... I can't tell you
how relieved I am to see
299
00:11:31,012 --> 00:11:32,969
what a success you are, Fern.
300
00:11:32,970 --> 00:11:34,368
- Relieved?
- Yeah...
301
00:11:34,398 --> 00:11:37,601
that first day of sophomore year...
302
00:11:37,877 --> 00:11:39,969
I always felt terrible
about skipping out
303
00:11:39,970 --> 00:11:42,510
on our color guard cocaptain tryouts.
304
00:11:42,540 --> 00:11:44,123
I'm so sorry.
305
00:11:44,153 --> 00:11:46,497
Well, that was ages ago.
306
00:11:46,527 --> 00:11:48,961
I know. I've just been worried
this whole time that
307
00:11:48,991 --> 00:11:51,719
I might've derailed your life
in some way because of it.
308
00:11:51,749 --> 00:11:52,996
Do I looked derailed?
309
00:11:53,026 --> 00:11:55,694
Gosh, no. You look gorg.
310
00:11:55,724 --> 00:11:57,098
All caps.
311
00:11:57,128 --> 00:11:58,136
And you're doing everything
312
00:11:58,137 --> 00:11:59,535
that I ever dreamed of.
313
00:11:59,565 --> 00:12:01,535
- What do you mean?
- Well, I'd love to travel the world,
314
00:12:01,565 --> 00:12:03,298
give back in some meaningful way, so
315
00:12:03,328 --> 00:12:04,857
I've been trying to transfer
316
00:12:04,887 --> 00:12:07,490
into my company's cyber
division, CyberHugs.
317
00:12:07,520 --> 00:12:09,523
And there's an open spot
they're going to fill
318
00:12:09,524 --> 00:12:12,633
by the end of the month and
I think I have a good shot.
319
00:12:12,663 --> 00:12:13,788
WOMAN: Found your soul mate!
320
00:12:13,818 --> 00:12:15,151
Oh. Ugh.
321
00:12:15,181 --> 00:12:17,815
Sorry, my friend signed me
up for these dating apps.
322
00:12:17,845 --> 00:12:19,813
- Holy...
- Shiatsu. Look for an envelope
323
00:12:19,843 --> 00:12:22,593
with the word "Shiatsu."
It's our code word.
324
00:12:23,908 --> 00:12:25,171
Oh.
325
00:12:25,201 --> 00:12:26,527
WOMAN: Found your soul mate!
326
00:12:26,528 --> 00:12:28,050
Oh, good lord.
327
00:12:28,080 --> 00:12:29,248
Bingo.
328
00:12:29,278 --> 00:12:30,564
(Laughs)
329
00:12:32,083 --> 00:12:33,358
(Laughs)
330
00:12:36,112 --> 00:12:37,793
Oh... man, that's really...
331
00:12:37,823 --> 00:12:39,281
Unbelievable.
332
00:12:39,282 --> 00:12:40,542
This guy's my ex...
333
00:12:40,572 --> 00:12:42,953
and that's my arm he
chopped out of my own photo.
334
00:12:42,983 --> 00:12:44,307
But you match.
335
00:12:44,308 --> 00:12:45,502
Maybe that's a sign you guys
336
00:12:45,532 --> 00:12:47,382
are meant to be, after all.
337
00:12:47,635 --> 00:12:48,990
No.
338
00:12:49,248 --> 00:12:50,244
No, I mean there's always
339
00:12:50,274 --> 00:12:51,302
that part of you that has
340
00:12:51,303 --> 00:12:53,283
a hard time letting go of an ex, but...
341
00:12:53,313 --> 00:12:55,269
I've moved on.
342
00:12:55,270 --> 00:12:57,281
Oh, why do I have to reject him again?
343
00:12:57,282 --> 00:12:59,573
It's just salt in the wound.
344
00:12:59,603 --> 00:13:01,886
Maybe you should wait for him to do it.
345
00:13:02,248 --> 00:13:03,281
Yeah.
346
00:13:03,282 --> 00:13:05,044
(Laughs)
347
00:13:05,074 --> 00:13:07,081
This is nice.
348
00:13:07,082 --> 00:13:09,769
That we can just pick
right up where we left off.
349
00:13:09,799 --> 00:13:11,862
It is nice.
350
00:13:12,724 --> 00:13:14,594
I just got the most fab idea.
351
00:13:14,624 --> 00:13:17,020
If we have any positions open here...
352
00:13:17,050 --> 00:13:19,070
wouldn't it be fun to make a difference,
353
00:13:19,100 --> 00:13:20,505
you know, together?
354
00:13:20,535 --> 00:13:23,167
Wow, that would be amazing.
355
00:13:23,197 --> 00:13:25,073
Uh, but I'd... you know,
I'd have to think it through.
356
00:13:25,074 --> 00:13:26,086
Great, let's get lunch tomorrow.
357
00:13:26,087 --> 00:13:27,369
We'll noodle it over.
358
00:13:27,399 --> 00:13:29,760
I'd love that, but I normally eat lunch
359
00:13:29,790 --> 00:13:31,453
in our cafeteria at work.
360
00:13:31,483 --> 00:13:34,423
However, tomorrow is Tater Tot Tuesday,
361
00:13:34,453 --> 00:13:35,481
if you want to join.
362
00:13:35,482 --> 00:13:37,071
I would love to.
363
00:13:37,101 --> 00:13:38,140
Fun Fern Fact,
364
00:13:38,170 --> 00:13:39,990
Tater Tots are my fave.
365
00:13:40,020 --> 00:13:42,019
I remember.
366
00:13:42,020 --> 00:13:44,590
Okay, great, well, I will...
I'll see you tomorrow then.
367
00:13:44,620 --> 00:13:45,661
She plays with puppies
368
00:13:45,662 --> 00:13:48,698
all day... and, Fun Fern Fact,
369
00:13:48,699 --> 00:13:53,089
she's been to Uruguay
and Cambodia and Estonia.
370
00:13:53,119 --> 00:13:55,429
You know, I guess I didn't
ruin her life after all.
371
00:13:55,459 --> 00:13:58,821
Brilliant. Then you can
cross 17 off your list.
372
00:14:02,183 --> 00:14:04,619
Uh... come to think of it,
373
00:14:04,620 --> 00:14:06,982
Fern never actually accepted my apology.
374
00:14:07,012 --> 00:14:08,374
I'm so sorry.
375
00:14:08,404 --> 00:14:10,694
Well, that was ages ago.
376
00:14:10,695 --> 00:14:12,440
Yeah, but you made the apology.
377
00:14:12,470 --> 00:14:14,571
- That's what counts.
- No, but my number 17
378
00:14:14,601 --> 00:14:16,998
was "Get Fern's forgiveness."
379
00:14:17,028 --> 00:14:19,178
I don't think I've done that yet.
380
00:14:20,036 --> 00:14:21,038
Maybe she didn't think
381
00:14:21,068 --> 00:14:23,536
I was being sincere.
382
00:14:24,028 --> 00:14:27,486
Tomorrow at lunch, I am
gonna apologize so hard,
383
00:14:27,487 --> 00:14:28,527
Fern won't know what hit her.
384
00:14:28,528 --> 00:14:30,486
Yeah, I like your style.
385
00:14:30,487 --> 00:14:31,511
A sincerity tsunami.
386
00:14:31,512 --> 00:14:32,540
(Chuckles)
387
00:14:32,541 --> 00:14:34,523
How's the baseball hunt going?
388
00:14:34,524 --> 00:14:36,050
Eh, good news and bad news.
389
00:14:36,080 --> 00:14:37,494
Okay, give me the good news.
390
00:14:37,495 --> 00:14:40,540
- I found the baseball card.
- That was fast.
391
00:14:40,541 --> 00:14:41,787
Actually, it wasn't that hard to track.
392
00:14:41,817 --> 00:14:44,326
The serial number was a factorial prime.
393
00:14:44,356 --> 00:14:46,019
Hot nerd alert.
394
00:14:46,049 --> 00:14:47,502
(Chuckles) Okay.
395
00:14:47,503 --> 00:14:49,168
What is the bad news?
396
00:14:52,980 --> 00:14:55,469
- (Whispering): We can't steal that.
- _
397
00:14:55,470 --> 00:14:58,194
(Whispering): It's already stolen, Evie.
398
00:14:58,224 --> 00:15:01,224
We're just gonna return
it to its rightful owner.
399
00:15:08,444 --> 00:15:10,204
- EVIE: Ow.
- XAVIER: You're on my foot.
400
00:15:10,234 --> 00:15:11,733
EVIE (Whispering): I'm
just trying to get my arm...
401
00:15:11,763 --> 00:15:12,762
ow... unpinned.
402
00:15:12,763 --> 00:15:14,573
- Ow.
- Shh, shh, shh.
403
00:15:14,603 --> 00:15:15,366
You okay?
404
00:15:15,396 --> 00:15:16,745
Here's the plan, all right?
405
00:15:16,746 --> 00:15:18,276
Once the museum closes,
406
00:15:18,306 --> 00:15:19,737
we're gonna slip out of here,
407
00:15:19,738 --> 00:15:22,754
we're gonna swap the Frank
Thomas card for this one.
408
00:15:22,755 --> 00:15:24,724
What? No, Frank Thomas
is way better looking
409
00:15:24,725 --> 00:15:25,724
than Nolan Ryan.
410
00:15:25,725 --> 00:15:26,737
Yeah, but Ryan's cards
411
00:15:26,738 --> 00:15:28,008
are more valuable.
412
00:15:28,038 --> 00:15:29,716
Museum's getting it for a steal.
413
00:15:29,717 --> 00:15:30,842
(Phone beeps)
414
00:15:31,790 --> 00:15:34,749
So, um... how's-how's the whole, um...
415
00:15:34,750 --> 00:15:37,119
ethical non-monogamy journey going?
416
00:15:37,149 --> 00:15:38,274
Good.
417
00:15:38,705 --> 00:15:39,920
- Different, you know?
- Mm.
418
00:15:39,950 --> 00:15:41,210
You? Yours?
419
00:15:41,240 --> 00:15:43,958
Yeah, you know, I'm, um...
420
00:15:44,264 --> 00:15:45,592
journeying.
421
00:15:48,143 --> 00:15:49,958
- So, um...
- Yeah?
422
00:15:49,988 --> 00:15:53,034
What should we do
until the museum closes?
423
00:16:05,392 --> 00:16:06,642
(Gasps)
424
00:16:06,672 --> 00:16:07,933
Busted.
425
00:16:07,934 --> 00:16:08,971
(Chomps)
426
00:16:10,344 --> 00:16:11,223
You're not the first couple
427
00:16:11,253 --> 00:16:13,510
to go for a home run in that locker.
428
00:16:13,540 --> 00:16:14,933
I'm gonna have to take you in.
429
00:16:14,934 --> 00:16:15,954
No, come on, mate.
430
00:16:15,955 --> 00:16:17,318
You don't want to do that.
431
00:16:17,663 --> 00:16:18,812
I don't?
432
00:16:18,842 --> 00:16:20,829
Well, think of all the paperwork.
433
00:16:22,153 --> 00:16:23,883
Well, there might be
something we can work out.
434
00:16:23,884 --> 00:16:25,594
Uh, all right, n-name it.
435
00:16:25,624 --> 00:16:27,817
A kiss... with tongue.
436
00:16:28,871 --> 00:16:31,556
(Whispering): Kissing a law
officer's on my list, so...
437
00:16:31,586 --> 00:16:33,491
Okay, deal.
438
00:16:34,166 --> 00:16:36,090
No, not-not you.
439
00:16:36,120 --> 00:16:37,172
Him.
440
00:16:38,256 --> 00:16:39,393
Oh.
441
00:16:41,575 --> 00:16:42,641
Okay.
442
00:16:42,842 --> 00:16:43,842
Okay?
443
00:16:46,344 --> 00:16:47,805
Mm.
444
00:16:54,846 --> 00:16:56,829
(Smooching)
445
00:17:07,242 --> 00:17:08,242
Mm.
446
00:17:09,779 --> 00:17:11,808
So... do you want to...
447
00:17:11,809 --> 00:17:13,813
hit any more bases or are we good?
448
00:17:15,104 --> 00:17:16,838
Great.
449
00:17:17,207 --> 00:17:19,737
_
450
00:17:19,767 --> 00:17:21,767
Um.
451
00:17:22,829 --> 00:17:24,976
- Win-win.
- Boom!
452
00:17:25,006 --> 00:17:27,537
You have big balls for a lady.
453
00:17:27,567 --> 00:17:28,566
Say again?
454
00:17:28,567 --> 00:17:30,413
You've been shopping around.
455
00:17:30,443 --> 00:17:31,545
I just hung up
456
00:17:31,546 --> 00:17:33,137
with a Francis Fernberger.
457
00:17:33,167 --> 00:17:34,178
Fern.
458
00:17:34,179 --> 00:17:35,505
She informed me you're to have
459
00:17:35,535 --> 00:17:37,178
lunch today to discuss a job
460
00:17:37,179 --> 00:17:39,154
at Best Pals Animal Shelter.
461
00:17:39,155 --> 00:17:40,907
Oh. No.
462
00:17:40,937 --> 00:17:43,158
Well, Fern's an old friend,
463
00:17:43,159 --> 00:17:45,141
so she mentioned a possible job,
464
00:17:45,142 --> 00:17:48,584
but in a, in a very theoretical way.
465
00:17:48,825 --> 00:17:53,162
As you know, the CyberHugs
position is still up for grabs.
466
00:17:53,163 --> 00:17:55,810
Your name crossed my mind...
467
00:17:55,840 --> 00:17:56,820
in a very...
468
00:17:56,850 --> 00:17:58,890
theoretical way...
469
00:17:59,200 --> 00:18:00,128
but now I am
470
00:18:00,129 --> 00:18:01,693
tempted to put the kibosh on it.
471
00:18:01,723 --> 00:18:03,762
No, please, don't... don't kibosh it.
472
00:18:03,792 --> 00:18:08,766
Luckily for you, I
found Fern delightful.
473
00:18:08,767 --> 00:18:10,804
She's a remarkable woman.
474
00:18:10,805 --> 00:18:14,833
Yeah, she can execute a Peggy
Spin better than anyone I know.
475
00:18:15,530 --> 00:18:17,425
It's a flag thing, just, never mind.
476
00:18:17,455 --> 00:18:20,412
I, uh, would like to
probe her brain for ways
477
00:18:20,413 --> 00:18:22,937
to improve our CyberHugs program.
478
00:18:22,967 --> 00:18:27,591
I could be swayed to
unkibosh my recommendation
479
00:18:27,621 --> 00:18:30,296
should you choose to set up
a lunch for Fern and myself.
480
00:18:30,326 --> 00:18:33,411
You... you want to
eat Tater Tots with us?
481
00:18:33,441 --> 00:18:35,029
Your attendance is optional.
482
00:18:36,034 --> 00:18:37,050
(Gasps)
483
00:18:47,725 --> 00:18:48,838
I'm supposed to be here alone.
484
00:18:48,868 --> 00:18:50,937
Get... get back to your bench.
485
00:18:50,967 --> 00:18:52,332
- I'm breaking protocol.
- Stop it.
486
00:18:52,362 --> 00:18:54,041
I'm bored.
487
00:18:54,272 --> 00:18:56,020
Oh, oh, oh!
488
00:18:56,629 --> 00:18:57,816
Go time.
489
00:18:57,846 --> 00:18:59,441
TIMOTHY: What? She's, like, 90.
490
00:18:59,471 --> 00:19:00,520
HANK: With polymer
491
00:19:00,521 --> 00:19:02,312
latex prosthetics,
Winnie could look any age.
492
00:19:02,342 --> 00:19:04,342
- (Phone chimes)
- _
493
00:19:05,751 --> 00:19:07,147
Bianca still hittin' you up?
494
00:19:07,177 --> 00:19:09,354
Yeah. She wants to "chokeslam" me.
495
00:19:09,355 --> 00:19:10,383
I'm starting to get worried
496
00:19:10,384 --> 00:19:12,362
about your sex wrestling, tea bag.
497
00:19:12,363 --> 00:19:14,383
Yeah. Me, too.
498
00:19:14,384 --> 00:19:17,383
The Boston Crab isn't
nearly as fun as it sounds.
499
00:19:17,384 --> 00:19:19,179
Well, that doesn't sound fun at all.
500
00:19:19,209 --> 00:19:21,212
WOMAN: Your soul mate is waiting.
501
00:19:21,213 --> 00:19:22,213
Damn!
502
00:19:22,652 --> 00:19:26,241
You still haven't pulled
the trigger on Evie?
503
00:19:26,566 --> 00:19:27,566
I just...
504
00:19:28,944 --> 00:19:30,478
I just keep thinking that...
505
00:19:30,508 --> 00:19:32,460
You know, maybe it's a sign...
506
00:19:32,490 --> 00:19:35,220
that we should still be together.
507
00:19:35,221 --> 00:19:38,183
Here's a sign. Wake up and reject her
508
00:19:38,184 --> 00:19:39,427
before she rejects you.
509
00:19:39,457 --> 00:19:40,785
Again.
510
00:19:40,815 --> 00:19:41,815
All right.
511
00:19:43,167 --> 00:19:44,233
I'm sorry.
512
00:19:44,234 --> 00:19:45,900
Just... tough love.
513
00:19:45,930 --> 00:19:47,417
No. No, I get it.
514
00:19:47,447 --> 00:19:49,191
I get it.
515
00:19:49,758 --> 00:19:51,947
Oh, hey, look, a food vendor.
516
00:19:53,019 --> 00:19:56,195
Shall I order you the catfish?
517
00:19:56,196 --> 00:19:58,167
518
00:20:00,162 --> 00:20:01,593
She's real.
519
00:20:02,076 --> 00:20:04,033
Hey, um, yesterday in your office,
520
00:20:04,063 --> 00:20:05,587
I think there was some confusion.
521
00:20:05,617 --> 00:20:07,641
I wasn't trying to get a new job,
522
00:20:07,642 --> 00:20:10,466
so when you called my boss,
I mean, it kind of, uh,
523
00:20:10,496 --> 00:20:12,424
it kind of got me in hot water.
524
00:20:12,425 --> 00:20:14,279
Evie, I feel terrible.
525
00:20:14,309 --> 00:20:15,948
It was just a standard reference check.
526
00:20:15,978 --> 00:20:17,358
I guess I got excited at the prospect
527
00:20:17,359 --> 00:20:19,625
of working with a friend.
528
00:20:19,655 --> 00:20:20,763
I'm so sorry.
529
00:20:20,793 --> 00:20:25,291
That's okay. I totally forgive you.
530
00:20:25,292 --> 00:20:27,308
And again, I want to reiterate
531
00:20:27,309 --> 00:20:29,337
how genuinely sorry I am
532
00:20:29,338 --> 00:20:32,308
about what happened back in high school.
533
00:20:33,149 --> 00:20:35,855
Oh, is that Deirdre?
534
00:20:37,296 --> 00:20:39,267
Yeah. It is.
535
00:20:40,267 --> 00:20:41,324
WES: This is unreal.
536
00:20:41,325 --> 00:20:42,515
What brings the X-man
537
00:20:42,545 --> 00:20:44,337
to my Wesylum?
538
00:20:44,338 --> 00:20:49,963
Well, I came across something of yours.
539
00:20:53,067 --> 00:20:55,358
(Chuckling)
540
00:20:55,789 --> 00:20:57,324
Where did you find it, bro?
541
00:20:57,325 --> 00:20:59,313
Uh, in a case.
542
00:21:00,595 --> 00:21:03,358
An old Color Me Badd
CD case, probably yours.
543
00:21:03,359 --> 00:21:05,603
Well, thank you for
bringing it back, man.
544
00:21:05,633 --> 00:21:08,324
Oh, that is absolutely my pleasure, man.
545
00:21:08,325 --> 00:21:11,304
Um, well, this has been
great catching up, but...
546
00:21:11,305 --> 00:21:13,274
Hey, hey, hey, you know what's funny?
547
00:21:13,275 --> 00:21:15,312
Our cleaning lady
growing up, Mrs. Barnes,
548
00:21:15,313 --> 00:21:17,371
she got fired over this.
549
00:21:18,061 --> 00:21:18,992
What?
550
00:21:19,022 --> 00:21:20,556
Yeah, we figured she
was the one who took it,
551
00:21:20,586 --> 00:21:22,486
so my dad friggin' axed her.
552
00:21:26,086 --> 00:21:28,150
Do you know what happened to her?
553
00:21:28,180 --> 00:21:29,343
Who knows?
554
00:21:29,877 --> 00:21:32,814
Relax, bro, it's, uh, it's
not the end of the world.
555
00:21:32,844 --> 00:21:36,284
Yeah... pretend like it is.
556
00:21:37,733 --> 00:21:40,719
Well, uh, she kept sending
me birthday cards every year.
557
00:21:40,749 --> 00:21:42,525
I could dig 'em up, see if
there's a return address.
558
00:21:42,555 --> 00:21:43,782
That would be great.
559
00:21:43,812 --> 00:21:45,316
That would be beyond great.
560
00:21:45,346 --> 00:21:46,987
(Laughter)
561
00:21:47,017 --> 00:21:48,983
And then, in ninth grade,
562
00:21:48,984 --> 00:21:51,008
Evie snarted in Brent Wellman's minivan
563
00:21:51,009 --> 00:21:52,587
after soccer practice.
564
00:21:52,617 --> 00:21:56,249
Oh, wait, back up. What's a snart?
565
00:21:56,279 --> 00:21:57,505
(Sneezes, flatulence)
566
00:21:57,535 --> 00:21:59,016
(Laughter)
567
00:21:59,017 --> 00:22:01,028
I've never laughed this hard sober.
568
00:22:01,029 --> 00:22:02,966
Evie, why have you been
569
00:22:02,967 --> 00:22:05,826
keeping Fern from us all this time?
570
00:22:05,856 --> 00:22:08,283
Oh, you know, friends drift apart.
571
00:22:08,313 --> 00:22:09,983
Yeah, Evie joined the volleyball team,
572
00:22:09,984 --> 00:22:11,634
so we both made new friends.
573
00:22:12,289 --> 00:22:16,033
David... oh, Michael. Guys, can I eat?
574
00:22:16,743 --> 00:22:19,004
Fun Fern Fact, those lunches
575
00:22:19,005 --> 00:22:21,978
inspired me to start Best
Pals Animal Sanctuary.
576
00:22:21,979 --> 00:22:24,746
Because a bond with an animal
577
00:22:24,776 --> 00:22:27,041
is a bond for life.
578
00:22:27,042 --> 00:22:30,091
That's like the saddest best story ever.
579
00:22:30,121 --> 00:22:32,095
Animals, if properly
neutered and cleaned,
580
00:22:32,125 --> 00:22:33,149
can have value.
581
00:22:33,150 --> 00:22:35,360
We had a pet turkey named Pretzel
582
00:22:35,390 --> 00:22:36,552
when I was a child.
583
00:22:36,582 --> 00:22:38,783
And he, of course, was slaughtered
584
00:22:38,813 --> 00:22:40,370
one year for Thanksgiving.
585
00:22:40,400 --> 00:22:44,657
To this day, I can't bring
myself to eat pretzels.
586
00:22:45,121 --> 00:22:47,120
I can't eat pretzels either.
587
00:22:47,121 --> 00:22:50,858
- It's a gluten thing.
- CyberHugs does not yet have
588
00:22:50,888 --> 00:22:54,148
an animal rescue branch,
but it certainly should.
589
00:22:54,178 --> 00:22:58,212
And I think someone with your
experience should launch it.
590
00:22:59,313 --> 00:23:03,137
Well, Fern has a lot on her
plate with her own organization.
591
00:23:03,138 --> 00:23:05,471
But if it were a consulting thing...
592
00:23:05,501 --> 00:23:06,851
Terrific.
593
00:23:06,881 --> 00:23:09,962
You can vet each animal charity
594
00:23:09,992 --> 00:23:12,949
to determine the ones most
worthy of CyberHugs' donation.
595
00:23:12,979 --> 00:23:14,298
No.
596
00:23:14,328 --> 00:23:17,027
I mean, no way.
That's-that's so exciting.
597
00:23:17,057 --> 00:23:18,566
(Chuckles)
598
00:23:18,567 --> 00:23:20,291
Welcome aboard, Fern.
599
00:23:20,321 --> 00:23:22,595
XAVIER: This is starting
to get out of control.
600
00:23:22,596 --> 00:23:25,554
That stupid baseball card
didn't just affect my mate...
601
00:23:25,555 --> 00:23:27,587
it ruined some poor
cleaning lady's life as well.
602
00:23:27,588 --> 00:23:29,562
And now I've got to go
find out where she lives
603
00:23:29,563 --> 00:23:31,408
so I can apologize. Ugh!
604
00:23:31,438 --> 00:23:33,993
This was supposed to be an
easy one to cross off the list.
605
00:23:34,023 --> 00:23:36,232
Heavy load, man.
606
00:23:36,749 --> 00:23:39,433
How's, uh, number 1259
607
00:23:39,434 --> 00:23:41,433
on the apocalyst comin' along?
608
00:23:41,434 --> 00:23:45,433
I am still trying to be Zen on that one.
609
00:23:45,434 --> 00:23:48,441
But just the thought
of Evie with other guys,
610
00:23:48,442 --> 00:23:51,954
it's just like a shiv
twisting in my side.
611
00:23:51,984 --> 00:23:55,964
Okay. Time for a coffee metaphor.
612
00:23:55,994 --> 00:23:58,573
Ever have Tanzania peaberry?
613
00:23:58,970 --> 00:24:00,920
Most people can't stomach it.
614
00:24:01,458 --> 00:24:02,804
Too acidic.
615
00:24:02,834 --> 00:24:06,475
But if you drink
enough, the body adapts.
616
00:24:07,302 --> 00:24:08,802
Or you get an ulcer.
617
00:24:14,123 --> 00:24:17,416
Oh, wow. I didn't know
that could be pierced.
618
00:24:17,417 --> 00:24:20,449
Uh, breeds box turtles?
619
00:24:20,857 --> 00:24:24,437
Is that a thumb or, uh...
620
00:24:24,438 --> 00:24:26,496
(Speaking indistinctly)
621
00:24:29,471 --> 00:24:30,838
... in the environmental, health,
622
00:24:30,868 --> 00:24:33,479
and educational fields...
623
00:24:34,161 --> 00:24:35,748
Nice of you to join us.
624
00:24:35,778 --> 00:24:39,616
Sorry. I didn't realize
we had a meeting scheduled.
625
00:24:39,617 --> 00:24:41,244
I e-mailed everyone last night.
626
00:24:41,274 --> 00:24:42,624
Proceeds earmarked
627
00:24:42,625 --> 00:24:45,620
for the animal welfare
branch will benefit
628
00:24:45,621 --> 00:24:48,923
outfits like... Purrrfect Rescue.
629
00:24:48,953 --> 00:24:51,946
(Awwing, chuckling)
630
00:24:51,976 --> 00:24:54,247
- Okay, any questions?
- Ooh!
631
00:24:54,277 --> 00:24:57,574
Um, Hank. Is that the same organization
632
00:24:57,575 --> 00:24:59,005
that plays the Sarah McLachlan music?
633
00:24:59,035 --> 00:25:01,645
It isn't, Hank, but, Fun Fern Fact,
634
00:25:01,646 --> 00:25:05,397
I am helping them secure
an Evanescence ballad.
635
00:25:05,427 --> 00:25:06,884
(Chuckles)
636
00:25:06,914 --> 00:25:08,982
All right, that's my spiel.
637
00:25:09,012 --> 00:25:12,033
Um, but before you go, I
just wanted to thank everyone
638
00:25:12,063 --> 00:25:14,359
for making me feel so welcome.
639
00:25:14,389 --> 00:25:17,754
I've never had a job that
felt so much like family.
640
00:25:17,784 --> 00:25:20,788
(Applause)
641
00:25:26,717 --> 00:25:29,758
H-Hey, uh, I-I never
got your e-mail, Fern.
642
00:25:29,759 --> 00:25:31,762
Hmm, that's strange.
643
00:25:32,053 --> 00:25:35,093
Oh, I accidentally misspelled your name.
644
00:25:35,123 --> 00:25:37,215
"Evil Covington."
645
00:25:37,245 --> 00:25:39,400
I'm so sorry.
646
00:25:44,089 --> 00:25:45,783
(Scoffs)
647
00:25:46,486 --> 00:25:49,762
That bitch has it out for me.
648
00:25:51,981 --> 00:25:53,895
649
00:26:00,222 --> 00:26:01,517
(Gasps)
650
00:26:01,647 --> 00:26:03,646
For crying out loud, Evie.
651
00:26:03,647 --> 00:26:06,041
Are you trying to
turn me into a snarter?
652
00:26:06,071 --> 00:26:08,055
Do you have a minute?
It's-it's about Fern.
653
00:26:08,085 --> 00:26:10,046
Oh. She's tremendous.
654
00:26:10,047 --> 00:26:11,541
I just put a call into corporate.
655
00:26:11,571 --> 00:26:13,046
I don't think we're gonna have to fill
656
00:26:13,047 --> 00:26:14,620
that full-time CyberHugs
position after all.
657
00:26:14,650 --> 00:26:16,758
No, but that was supposed
to be my position.
658
00:26:16,788 --> 00:26:19,096
Frankly, your loyalty issues concern me.
659
00:26:19,097 --> 00:26:20,728
You took an employment interview
660
00:26:20,758 --> 00:26:21,849
- elsewhere,
- No, that wasn't...
661
00:26:21,879 --> 00:26:23,105
skipped out on our
animal launch meeting...
662
00:26:23,106 --> 00:26:25,063
She never sent me the e-mail.
663
00:26:25,064 --> 00:26:27,063
The animals don't want
your excuses, Evie,
664
00:26:27,064 --> 00:26:28,624
and neither do I.
665
00:26:29,262 --> 00:26:30,401
EVIE: Fern won't accept
666
00:26:30,431 --> 00:26:32,088
my apology, she embarrassed me
667
00:26:32,089 --> 00:26:35,038
in front of my colleagues,
and she stole my dream job.
668
00:26:35,039 --> 00:26:37,541
You know, I think she has it out for me.
669
00:26:37,571 --> 00:26:39,288
Babe, you sound more paranoid than Hank.
670
00:26:39,289 --> 00:26:41,817
Fern's awesome. Warm
heart, beautiful soul...
671
00:26:41,847 --> 00:26:43,296
What did she give you?
672
00:26:43,297 --> 00:26:45,296
Her company's box seats
to the hockey game.
673
00:26:45,297 --> 00:26:47,284
There's something about a man
with missing teeth...
674
00:26:47,285 --> 00:26:49,285
- Never mind.
- It was just a gift
675
00:26:49,315 --> 00:26:51,213
for setting her up on TrueSoulMate.
676
00:26:51,243 --> 00:26:52,832
Speaking of which, how's
the bone patrol going?
677
00:26:52,862 --> 00:26:54,945
Have you PNP'd any VGLs?
678
00:26:54,975 --> 00:26:56,288
Good-ish.
679
00:26:56,289 --> 00:26:59,076
Did you know dogs can sniff
out buried human remains
680
00:26:59,106 --> 00:27:01,127
better than any machine?
681
00:27:02,135 --> 00:27:03,938
Gnarliest barrel ever. Dropped in,
682
00:27:03,968 --> 00:27:05,395
got sucked up, hit the lip.
683
00:27:05,425 --> 00:27:06,518
It was like, baw!
684
00:27:06,548 --> 00:27:08,288
My doctor thinks it's allergies.
685
00:27:08,289 --> 00:27:10,861
I'm allergic to mold.
A-And some pollens.
686
00:27:10,891 --> 00:27:13,313
Greek salad. Leg hair...
687
00:27:13,314 --> 00:27:16,255
Lots of fascinating folks out there.
688
00:27:16,256 --> 00:27:18,706
WOMAN: Your soul mate is still waiting.
689
00:27:21,234 --> 00:27:23,330
Why won't he do it first?
690
00:27:23,331 --> 00:27:25,296
Enough with this game
of TrueSoulMate chicken.
691
00:27:25,297 --> 00:27:28,239
You already hit that,
so let's quit that.
692
00:27:29,260 --> 00:27:31,331
(Sighs)
693
00:27:34,864 --> 00:27:36,250
- WOMAN: Soul mate rejected.
- (Gasps)
694
00:27:36,251 --> 00:27:38,330
What's the damage, Golden-T?
695
00:27:38,331 --> 00:27:40,800
Oh. You see that? That's your sign.
696
00:27:40,830 --> 00:27:43,150
You need to quit waiting
around like a chump.
697
00:27:43,180 --> 00:27:45,782
- Oh, I'm no chump.
- You're damn right you're no chump.
698
00:27:45,812 --> 00:27:47,795
You're a choke-slammin',
face-bustin' piledriver.
699
00:27:47,825 --> 00:27:49,726
- Hell yeah! Yeah?
- Yeah!
700
00:27:49,756 --> 00:27:52,280
Quit wastin' time and
get back in that ring.
701
00:27:52,281 --> 00:27:55,271
- (Groans)
- Just like I'm doin' with Winnie.
702
00:27:55,892 --> 00:27:57,271
She blew you off.
703
00:27:57,272 --> 00:27:59,876
It's 'cause she's a man in the Ukraine.
704
00:27:59,906 --> 00:28:02,692
No. She knew we broke protocol.
705
00:28:02,968 --> 00:28:05,520
I think she was that old
woman with the oxygen tank.
706
00:28:05,813 --> 00:28:07,296
But I got her to agree
to another meet-up.
707
00:28:07,297 --> 00:28:09,826
And I know she'll show
up next time. I know it.
708
00:28:10,171 --> 00:28:11,637
So come on.
709
00:28:11,667 --> 00:28:15,314
(Sighs) Okay. Here I go again.
710
00:28:26,289 --> 00:28:28,264
(Sighs)
711
00:28:30,247 --> 00:28:32,075
Hey. We need to talk.
712
00:28:32,886 --> 00:28:33,955
Everything okay?
713
00:28:33,985 --> 00:28:36,959
You wriggle into my life,
steal my friends, steal my job.
714
00:28:36,960 --> 00:28:38,896
And for what? To get even
for something that happened
715
00:28:38,926 --> 00:28:40,967
in high school a decade ago?
716
00:28:40,968 --> 00:28:43,984
Well, Fun Evie Fact, I'm
not gonna be bullied by you
717
00:28:43,985 --> 00:28:45,984
because I made an insensitive decision
718
00:28:45,985 --> 00:28:49,126
to join an after-school sport.
So you're right, it's on!
719
00:28:49,156 --> 00:28:50,980
It's so on I might spike this ball
720
00:28:50,981 --> 00:28:53,035
into your stupid little Fern face!
721
00:28:53,065 --> 00:28:54,621
DEIRDRE: Evie!
722
00:29:03,777 --> 00:29:04,984
What's all this?
723
00:29:04,985 --> 00:29:08,976
CyberHugs is donating athletic
equipment to inner city schools.
724
00:29:08,977 --> 00:29:11,246
"It's on" meant that
Deirdre approved it.
725
00:29:11,276 --> 00:29:14,076
So we're all pitching
in. I thought you knew.
726
00:29:15,195 --> 00:29:16,980
Fern, I'm so sorry. I promise
727
00:29:16,981 --> 00:29:19,227
- I'll-I'll...
- You'll what?
728
00:29:19,710 --> 00:29:21,520
Make it up to me?
729
00:29:22,503 --> 00:29:24,803
I think you could be our new spiker.
730
00:29:26,390 --> 00:29:28,914
Tryouts. Now.
731
00:29:31,922 --> 00:29:33,338
(Quietly): I'm so sorry.
732
00:29:33,368 --> 00:29:35,921
I promise I'll make it up to you.
733
00:29:35,922 --> 00:29:37,960
734
00:29:43,939 --> 00:29:45,980
All that I love
735
00:29:45,981 --> 00:29:49,632
In a moment, is gone
736
00:29:49,662 --> 00:29:52,946
I'm breaking...
737
00:29:52,947 --> 00:29:55,942
You do hold a grudge. I knew it.
738
00:29:55,943 --> 00:29:57,193
Of course I do.
739
00:29:57,434 --> 00:30:00,284
I spent three years
eating lunch with pigeons.
740
00:30:00,314 --> 00:30:01,641
- Fern, I...
- And when you showed up
741
00:30:01,671 --> 00:30:05,210
on my doorstep, it was the perfect
opportunity to make you suffer
742
00:30:05,240 --> 00:30:07,190
for everything you did to me.
743
00:30:07,572 --> 00:30:08,658
But then I met all these
744
00:30:08,688 --> 00:30:11,705
cool people you work
with, and they accepted me.
745
00:30:11,735 --> 00:30:13,299
I mean, this place
746
00:30:13,329 --> 00:30:16,696
is everything I always
wanted in high school.
747
00:30:16,697 --> 00:30:18,738
But I thought your colleagues
should have a chance
748
00:30:18,739 --> 00:30:20,087
to see your true colors.
749
00:30:20,117 --> 00:30:22,730
And now they have.
750
00:30:23,234 --> 00:30:24,738
I'm truly sorry,
751
00:30:24,739 --> 00:30:26,421
for everything.
752
00:30:26,451 --> 00:30:29,730
You keep saying that,
but the truth is...
753
00:30:29,731 --> 00:30:32,705
you never made it up to me.
754
00:30:32,706 --> 00:30:34,759
Being sorry doesn't change a thing.
755
00:30:34,760 --> 00:30:38,434
I'm just a shell of myself
756
00:30:38,464 --> 00:30:41,142
And I've never felt
757
00:30:41,172 --> 00:30:44,689
So empty.
758
00:30:48,381 --> 00:30:50,339
759
00:30:54,333 --> 00:30:55,353
Hello, sir, um...
760
00:30:55,354 --> 00:30:57,653
- My name is...
- 30 minutes late,
761
00:30:57,683 --> 00:30:59,144
you don't even have the pizza.
762
00:30:59,174 --> 00:31:00,310
Honey!
763
00:31:00,340 --> 00:31:02,644
He forgot the pizza.
764
00:31:02,645 --> 00:31:04,694
My wife? She gets a little hangry.
765
00:31:04,695 --> 00:31:07,421
(Chuckles) I-I don't have any pizza,
766
00:31:07,451 --> 00:31:09,699
Mr. Barnes. I'm here to
talk to your wife about...
767
00:31:09,700 --> 00:31:11,103
Barnes?
768
00:31:11,133 --> 00:31:13,241
You must be talking
about Annette Barnes.
769
00:31:13,271 --> 00:31:16,661
We bought the place
from her two years back.
770
00:31:16,662 --> 00:31:19,707
Do you have any idea where she is now?
771
00:31:19,708 --> 00:31:21,653
(Thunder rumbling in distance)
772
00:31:21,654 --> 00:31:22,707
XAVIER: In conclusion,
773
00:31:22,708 --> 00:31:24,661
I just hope my behavior
wasn't responsible
774
00:31:24,662 --> 00:31:26,650
in any way for your...
775
00:31:27,650 --> 00:31:29,362
uh, current condition,
776
00:31:29,392 --> 00:31:31,645
Mrs. Barnes.
777
00:31:32,671 --> 00:31:34,007
(Inhales)
778
00:31:36,371 --> 00:31:37,675
(Exhales)
779
00:31:40,164 --> 00:31:41,416
Four words.
780
00:31:41,446 --> 00:31:44,416
To sum up someone's whole life?
781
00:31:44,446 --> 00:31:45,682
Four words?
782
00:31:45,683 --> 00:31:47,670
Doesn't seem like it's enough.
783
00:31:48,216 --> 00:31:50,223
You know what?
784
00:31:50,253 --> 00:31:52,674
Words aren't enough.
785
00:31:52,675 --> 00:31:55,631
For this or for making amends.
786
00:31:57,097 --> 00:32:00,442
I think we're going about
our regrets all wrong.
787
00:32:03,645 --> 00:32:05,679
I think we need to do something.
788
00:32:06,721 --> 00:32:09,695
789
00:32:11,641 --> 00:32:13,031
DEIRDRE: Hard at work.
790
00:32:13,061 --> 00:32:16,592
Like a natural born
CyberHugs Team Leader.
791
00:32:16,622 --> 00:32:17,657
What's that?
792
00:32:17,658 --> 00:32:18,674
Spoke to corporate.
793
00:32:18,675 --> 00:32:19,711
We decided you're ready
794
00:32:19,712 --> 00:32:22,670
for your next phase here at Cybermart.
795
00:32:22,671 --> 00:32:23,951
(Gasps)
796
00:32:23,981 --> 00:32:25,682
I got it?
797
00:32:25,683 --> 00:32:28,678
Ooh! Yee! (Laughs)
798
00:32:28,679 --> 00:32:31,044
I find your excitement grating.
799
00:32:31,074 --> 00:32:33,545
I... Sorry. Oh!
800
00:32:33,575 --> 00:32:35,168
- Thank you!
- Don't...
801
00:32:35,198 --> 00:32:36,226
thank me.
802
00:32:36,256 --> 00:32:37,176
Corporate stipulated that
803
00:32:37,206 --> 00:32:39,378
I offer the position to a full-time
804
00:32:39,408 --> 00:32:40,714
Cybermart employee,
805
00:32:40,744 --> 00:32:43,012
any Cybermart employee,
806
00:32:43,042 --> 00:32:45,442
before going to an outside contractor.
807
00:32:47,228 --> 00:32:49,399
So you wanted to hire
Fern, but you can't?
808
00:32:49,400 --> 00:32:52,407
Not unless you turn down the offer.
809
00:32:52,408 --> 00:32:54,110
(Gasps)
810
00:32:56,404 --> 00:32:58,404
(Sighs)
811
00:33:06,919 --> 00:33:08,378
WOMAN: Code word.
812
00:33:09,217 --> 00:33:10,407
Shiatsu!
813
00:33:10,408 --> 00:33:12,408
814
00:33:15,403 --> 00:33:17,074
You're real.
815
00:33:17,104 --> 00:33:19,386
What's real? When we're all
living in a giant video-game...
816
00:33:19,387 --> 00:33:20,415
Programmed from another dimension...
817
00:33:20,445 --> 00:33:21,586
Designed to wrap us in a
818
00:33:21,616 --> 00:33:22,832
- false sense of security!
- False sense of security!
819
00:33:22,862 --> 00:33:24,815
(Laughter)
820
00:33:24,816 --> 00:33:26,414
(Exhales)
821
00:33:28,828 --> 00:33:30,782
Xavier Holliday?
822
00:33:31,083 --> 00:33:32,124
Yeah.
823
00:33:32,125 --> 00:33:34,174
Did you fill out your
mental health history?
824
00:33:34,175 --> 00:33:36,641
Um... well...
825
00:33:36,671 --> 00:33:38,140
I'm not actually, um...
826
00:33:38,141 --> 00:33:40,460
here for... for help.
827
00:33:41,115 --> 00:33:42,555
I'm the person that's responsible
828
00:33:42,585 --> 00:33:45,165
for ruining your mother's life.
829
00:33:45,166 --> 00:33:48,120
Well, to be honest, it was hard on us.
830
00:33:48,121 --> 00:33:50,120
Mom was helping me
with law school tuition,
831
00:33:50,121 --> 00:33:52,334
so I had to drop out.
832
00:33:52,364 --> 00:33:54,603
This is what I'm talking
about. I want to make amends.
833
00:33:54,633 --> 00:33:56,644
I can get you the money
to finish law school.
834
00:33:56,645 --> 00:33:58,949
I don't want your money, Xavier.
835
00:33:58,979 --> 00:34:01,524
My mom got depressed
after she was let go.
836
00:34:01,554 --> 00:34:04,423
I helped her through that
rough patch, and in the process,
837
00:34:04,453 --> 00:34:07,104
I realized law school wasn't my passion.
838
00:34:07,134 --> 00:34:09,081
But I have an ear for
other people's problems.
839
00:34:09,111 --> 00:34:10,511
And now here I am.
840
00:34:13,752 --> 00:34:15,549
Things often work out
the way they should.
841
00:34:15,550 --> 00:34:16,615
(Sighs)
842
00:34:16,616 --> 00:34:19,084
Do they? 'Cause here's the thing...
843
00:34:19,114 --> 00:34:20,992
there's this girl. And I want to be
844
00:34:21,022 --> 00:34:23,544
committed to her, but I can't tell her.
845
00:34:24,107 --> 00:34:26,565
What's holding you back?
846
00:34:27,082 --> 00:34:29,941
Um... I don't know.
She's having such fun
847
00:34:29,971 --> 00:34:32,549
with all these dating apps,
and... and it's my fault.
848
00:34:32,550 --> 00:34:35,350
I've... the one who
told her to go buck wild.
849
00:34:35,760 --> 00:34:37,091
Maybe she'd feel differently
850
00:34:37,121 --> 00:34:38,570
if she knew you wanted a commitment.
851
00:34:38,571 --> 00:34:41,045
But, you know, I don't
want her to feel stifled
852
00:34:41,075 --> 00:34:44,343
by my feelings. That's not
how ethical non-monogamy works.
853
00:34:44,373 --> 00:34:46,023
You want to be ethical?
854
00:34:46,542 --> 00:34:47,711
Then tell her the truth
855
00:34:47,741 --> 00:34:49,191
about how you feel.
856
00:34:49,358 --> 00:34:51,778
She might feel stifled or she might not.
857
00:34:51,779 --> 00:34:53,779
At least she knows her options.
858
00:34:57,546 --> 00:34:59,060
We're almost out of time.
859
00:34:59,090 --> 00:35:01,028
It's true.
860
00:35:01,058 --> 00:35:03,124
Our time is really precious.
861
00:35:03,125 --> 00:35:06,054
I mean our session is ending.
862
00:35:07,752 --> 00:35:08,752
Oh.
863
00:35:10,510 --> 00:35:12,976
_
864
00:35:23,711 --> 00:35:24,716
You called me out here
865
00:35:24,746 --> 00:35:26,969
to prove you can still
fit in your uniform?
866
00:35:26,999 --> 00:35:28,993
For one, it's so tight
I can't feel my arms.
867
00:35:28,994 --> 00:35:31,773
Secondly, remember when we
used to play kickball at recess?
868
00:35:31,803 --> 00:35:33,535
Every day in fourth grade.
869
00:35:33,565 --> 00:35:34,619
If the ball bounced weird
870
00:35:34,620 --> 00:35:36,569
during your turn to
kick, we'd call it...
871
00:35:36,570 --> 00:35:37,569
Do-over.
872
00:35:37,570 --> 00:35:38,577
That's what I want.
873
00:35:38,578 --> 00:35:40,115
A do-over.
874
00:35:40,736 --> 00:35:41,880
No, how can I trust you?
875
00:35:41,910 --> 00:35:44,352
You just want my job at CyberHugs.
876
00:35:44,382 --> 00:35:45,589
I turned it down.
877
00:35:45,590 --> 00:35:47,577
Told Deirdre this morning
878
00:35:47,578 --> 00:35:50,378
you're the most qualified
person for the job.
879
00:35:52,048 --> 00:35:53,296
Why would you do that?
880
00:35:53,326 --> 00:35:55,049
To make it up to you.
881
00:35:55,079 --> 00:35:56,581
Finally.
882
00:35:56,961 --> 00:35:58,811
And there's one more thing.
883
00:36:01,926 --> 00:36:03,557
You kept it.
884
00:36:10,571 --> 00:36:11,800
Flags up.
885
00:36:11,830 --> 00:36:13,531
We'll be singing
886
00:36:13,532 --> 00:36:14,769
-
When we're winning
- You got to be kidding me.
887
00:36:14,799 --> 00:36:17,453
- You know you want to.
-
We'll be singing
888
00:36:17,483 --> 00:36:18,954
Five, six, seven, eight!
889
00:36:18,984 --> 00:36:20,760
I get knocked down
890
00:36:20,761 --> 00:36:22,781
But I get up again,
you're never gonna
891
00:36:22,782 --> 00:36:24,793
Keep me down, I get knocked down
892
00:36:24,794 --> 00:36:26,752
But I get up again
893
00:36:26,753 --> 00:36:28,218
You're never gonna keep me down
894
00:36:28,248 --> 00:36:30,793
I get knocked down,
but I get up again
895
00:36:30,794 --> 00:36:32,641
You're never gonna keep me down
896
00:36:32,671 --> 00:36:35,764
I get knocked down,
but I get up again
897
00:36:35,765 --> 00:36:38,827
You're never gonna keep me down
898
00:36:40,289 --> 00:36:42,819
That's what you call
Biscuits and Gravy, baby!
899
00:36:42,820 --> 00:36:43,823
Yeah! Yeah!
900
00:36:43,824 --> 00:36:47,781
Yeah! Oh, yeah!
901
00:36:47,782 --> 00:36:49,757
We're still really good.
902
00:36:58,336 --> 00:37:00,969
So, what's your position on
discount mattress pricing?
903
00:37:00,999 --> 00:37:03,981
The government controls it
to fund cyberweapons programs.
904
00:37:03,982 --> 00:37:04,981
Yucca Mountain?
905
00:37:04,982 --> 00:37:05,981
Underground repository
906
00:37:05,982 --> 00:37:06,989
for alien technology.
907
00:37:06,990 --> 00:37:08,010
Are you sure we're not related?
908
00:37:08,011 --> 00:37:09,261
I know, right?
909
00:37:09,291 --> 00:37:10,477
- Yeah.
- But there is
910
00:37:10,507 --> 00:37:12,579
something I need to know.
911
00:37:12,609 --> 00:37:13,998
What's your name?
912
00:37:13,999 --> 00:37:16,243
You can whisper it. I
mean, for confidentiality.
913
00:37:16,273 --> 00:37:18,019
Don't worry... I swept
the immediate vicinity.
914
00:37:18,020 --> 00:37:19,981
Yeah, you know, maybe you
should still whisper it,
915
00:37:19,982 --> 00:37:21,789
you know, just to be safe.
916
00:37:23,375 --> 00:37:25,989
(Whispers)
917
00:37:25,990 --> 00:37:27,985
Hmm.
918
00:37:28,344 --> 00:37:29,944
How about the other ear?
919
00:37:30,949 --> 00:37:31,974
(Whispers)
920
00:37:33,957 --> 00:37:34,957
Huh.
921
00:37:36,295 --> 00:37:38,954
Okay, how about both at once?
922
00:37:54,011 --> 00:37:56,248
I felt like I was kissing my brother.
923
00:37:56,278 --> 00:37:58,735
Huh. I think we should just be friends.
924
00:37:58,765 --> 00:37:59,781
And battle buddies.
925
00:37:59,782 --> 00:38:01,096
When foreign forces hit our shores.
926
00:38:01,126 --> 00:38:02,143
Yeah!
927
00:38:02,173 --> 00:38:03,173
Yes!
928
00:38:05,724 --> 00:38:07,743
(Door opens)
929
00:38:07,744 --> 00:38:10,341
I broke up with my Internet girlfriend.
930
00:38:11,255 --> 00:38:12,893
Oh.
931
00:38:15,634 --> 00:38:17,346
Darling, you
932
00:38:17,376 --> 00:38:19,756
Lavender sticky notes.
933
00:38:19,757 --> 00:38:21,731
My favorite.
934
00:38:21,732 --> 00:38:23,199
May I have this dance?
935
00:38:23,229 --> 00:38:25,781
Every color of the rainbow
936
00:38:25,782 --> 00:38:28,739
Is my specialty
937
00:38:28,740 --> 00:38:30,798
Gonna make you shine
938
00:38:30,799 --> 00:38:33,855
It's like a brush to tickle you...
939
00:38:36,113 --> 00:38:38,251
WOMAN: Found your soul mate.
940
00:38:41,579 --> 00:38:43,044
Cute.
941
00:38:43,992 --> 00:38:45,596
WOMAN: Soul mate accepted!
942
00:38:51,770 --> 00:38:53,171
Oh, well, it's official.
943
00:38:53,201 --> 00:38:56,785
I finally get to cross
number 17 off my list.
944
00:38:56,786 --> 00:38:59,798
That outfit makes me want to
add, like, a dozen to mine.
945
00:38:59,799 --> 00:39:03,777
Oh. Well, how did it
go with Violet Barnes?
946
00:39:03,778 --> 00:39:07,217
She's a very gifted therapist.
947
00:39:07,247 --> 00:39:09,241
Oof. Is that a euphemism?
948
00:39:09,271 --> 00:39:10,760
No.
949
00:39:10,761 --> 00:39:13,383
She advised me to...
950
00:39:13,413 --> 00:39:16,212
put all my cards on the table.
951
00:39:16,242 --> 00:39:17,748
About?
952
00:39:17,749 --> 00:39:20,752
This whole ethical non-monogamy thing.
953
00:39:20,753 --> 00:39:22,777
Honestly, I'm totally fine with it.
954
00:39:22,778 --> 00:39:24,777
I don't want to do it anymore.
955
00:39:25,028 --> 00:39:26,525
What?
956
00:39:26,697 --> 00:39:29,010
Look... it was perfect for me.
957
00:39:29,011 --> 00:39:31,002
For a really long time, but...
958
00:39:31,454 --> 00:39:34,593
something's different now.
This is different.
959
00:39:36,127 --> 00:39:38,622
I don't want every possible option.
960
00:39:38,864 --> 00:39:40,998
I want you.
961
00:39:41,595 --> 00:39:42,985
Wow.
962
00:39:42,986 --> 00:39:44,014
(Phone dings)
963
00:39:44,015 --> 00:39:45,379
So...
964
00:39:45,793 --> 00:39:48,014
I just... I just wanted
you to know that,
965
00:39:48,044 --> 00:39:51,010
- for whatever it's worth.
- (Phone dings)
966
00:39:51,011 --> 00:39:53,092
And you have every right
967
00:39:53,122 --> 00:39:56,007
to carry on... journeying.
968
00:40:01,678 --> 00:40:03,161
Nah.
969
00:40:04,213 --> 00:40:05,592
I'm good.
970
00:40:06,989 --> 00:40:08,981
Oh, oh
971
00:40:08,982 --> 00:40:11,056
Oh, oh, oh
972
00:40:11,057 --> 00:40:13,019
Oh, oh
973
00:40:13,020 --> 00:40:15,206
Oh, oh, oh
974
00:40:15,236 --> 00:40:17,010
- Hey.
- Yeah?
975
00:40:17,040 --> 00:40:19,740
- I've got something to show you.
- Mm-hmm?
976
00:40:23,308 --> 00:40:25,023
No, you didn't.
977
00:40:25,024 --> 00:40:27,019
I certainly did.
978
00:40:27,293 --> 00:40:29,977
- Shall we?
- Oh, y...
979
00:40:30,007 --> 00:40:31,981
(Both laughing)
980
00:40:31,982 --> 00:40:33,014
Oh, oh
981
00:40:33,015 --> 00:40:36,078
Oh, oh, oh, oh
982
00:40:36,411 --> 00:40:43,877
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... www.addic7ed.com ...
983
00:40:43,927 --> 00:40:48,477
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