Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated:
1
00:00:00,063 --> 00:00:01,704
Jess, are you okay?
2
00:00:01,728 --> 00:00:04,600
Honey, you just fled to
your dad's house in Portland.
3
00:00:04,625 --> 00:00:06,702
What I did was a very tasteful,
4
00:00:06,727 --> 00:00:08,734
very understated skedaddle
5
00:00:08,759 --> 00:00:11,101
so I could get some much
needed space from Nick,
6
00:00:11,126 --> 00:00:12,500
and it worked. I'm fine.
7
00:00:12,525 --> 00:00:14,640
- So, you're coming back?
- I would, but...
8
00:00:14,665 --> 00:00:17,105
Ashley's out of town, and the man
doesn't do well without his wife.
9
00:00:17,153 --> 00:00:18,486
I can't in good conscience
10
00:00:18,511 --> 00:00:20,283
leave my elderly father here
11
00:00:20,308 --> 00:00:23,566
without someone to help him
steam-clean his bowling trophies.
12
00:00:23,591 --> 00:00:25,727
Hey, Jess. I think you should go home.
13
00:00:25,762 --> 00:00:28,284
Shut up, TV! That was the TV.
14
00:00:28,309 --> 00:00:30,216
- Hello?
- Go home? I just got here.
15
00:00:30,241 --> 00:00:31,442
And I-I love that.
16
00:00:31,467 --> 00:00:34,731
I love a surprise visit
for no reason at all.
17
00:00:34,756 --> 00:00:35,888
We had fun,
18
00:00:35,913 --> 00:00:37,233
but don't you think it's now,
19
00:00:37,258 --> 00:00:39,081
it's time for you to, you know,
20
00:00:39,106 --> 00:00:41,364
get back to your life.
21
00:00:41,389 --> 00:00:43,150
Dad, you still need me.
22
00:00:43,175 --> 00:00:44,450
I mean...
23
00:00:45,278 --> 00:00:47,315
we really half-assed those trophies!
24
00:00:47,350 --> 00:00:48,685
What? Th-they look great.
25
00:00:48,710 --> 00:00:51,083
Look. Oh, this one.
This one is fantastic.
26
00:00:51,108 --> 00:00:53,821
See this one? This is the ball
that I won that trophy with.
27
00:00:53,857 --> 00:00:56,128
This ball right here. Helen, I call...
28
00:00:56,153 --> 00:00:57,759
- Oh! Dad!
- (screaming)
29
00:00:57,794 --> 00:00:59,317
I-I waxed the holes.
30
00:00:59,342 --> 00:01:00,849
You waxed the holes?!
31
00:01:00,874 --> 00:01:02,161
Was I-I not supposed to?
32
00:01:02,186 --> 00:01:04,738
Not wise! Not wise!
33
00:01:04,763 --> 00:01:06,519
- It's okay.
- (whimpering)
34
00:01:06,544 --> 00:01:08,042
I'm right here,
35
00:01:08,067 --> 00:01:10,404
and I'm not going anywhere.
36
00:01:10,440 --> 00:01:11,739
(grunts)
37
00:01:11,775 --> 00:01:13,177
38
00:01:13,202 --> 00:01:15,544
Synced and corrected by Aaronnmb
www.addic7ed.com
39
00:01:16,153 --> 00:01:17,974
Oh, I'm so nervous to meet your mom.
40
00:01:17,999 --> 00:01:20,107
I'm bad with women and family.
41
00:01:20,132 --> 00:01:21,792
I wish she was a male stranger.
42
00:01:21,817 --> 00:01:23,083
NICK: You guys talking about Charmaine?
43
00:01:23,108 --> 00:01:25,859
- Yeah, my mom.
- Charmaine is a tough lady.
44
00:01:25,884 --> 00:01:27,211
My mom is just protective, okay?
45
00:01:27,236 --> 00:01:28,863
My dad walked out on
us when I was a baby.
46
00:01:28,888 --> 00:01:30,911
- I am her only son.
- Hey!
47
00:01:31,372 --> 00:01:32,683
What are you guys doing here?
48
00:01:32,708 --> 00:01:33,845
- Rude.
- What are we doing here?
49
00:01:33,870 --> 00:01:34,886
Yeah, what are you doing here?
50
00:01:34,911 --> 00:01:36,599
- Why are you here?
- What, just because we moved,
51
00:01:36,624 --> 00:01:38,098
we have to justify our presence here?
52
00:01:38,123 --> 00:01:39,223
Well, you don't live here, so...
53
00:01:39,248 --> 00:01:41,051
We're allowed to be here
for no reason at all.
54
00:01:41,076 --> 00:01:43,277
Oh, I get it. You're sad and lonely
55
00:01:43,302 --> 00:01:45,230
in your new house and you miss us.
56
00:01:45,255 --> 00:01:46,396
We do not need this.
57
00:01:46,421 --> 00:01:49,347
If anything, you-you people need us.
58
00:01:49,372 --> 00:01:52,046
We are married homeowners.
Benefit from our wisdom.
59
00:01:52,081 --> 00:01:53,881
Okay! I got to go.
60
00:01:53,917 --> 00:01:56,771
Aly and I have an
invited guest to plan for.
61
00:01:56,796 --> 00:01:58,223
- Oh.
- NICK: Good burn, Winston.
62
00:01:58,248 --> 00:01:59,560
- You're getting better at those.
- Thanks, man!
63
00:01:59,568 --> 00:02:01,285
Okay, I am off to my drug party.
64
00:02:01,310 --> 00:02:04,402
Reagan's, uh, pharm rep crew
is in town for a convention.
65
00:02:04,427 --> 00:02:07,458
Have fun. If you get too
drunk to drive, call me,
66
00:02:07,483 --> 00:02:09,282
'cause I will be, too,
and we can be twins.
67
00:02:09,318 --> 00:02:10,717
Wait, you're not going?
68
00:02:10,752 --> 00:02:12,841
Don't you want to meet Reagan's friends?
69
00:02:12,866 --> 00:02:15,033
Mm, we never really talked about it.
70
00:02:15,065 --> 00:02:18,154
Seems like something that a married
homeowner should weigh in on.
71
00:02:18,179 --> 00:02:20,810
How could you not talk about
such a major relationship step?
72
00:02:20,835 --> 00:02:23,529
Ugh, because we're not all
couple-y like you guys are.
73
00:02:23,554 --> 00:02:25,154
We don't talk about every little tiny...
74
00:02:25,179 --> 00:02:26,185
We don't gab all day
75
00:02:26,210 --> 00:02:28,295
like a couple of Italian
grandmas hanging their laundry.
76
00:02:28,320 --> 00:02:31,614
SCHMIDT: Talking is the
lifeblood of a relationship.
77
00:02:31,639 --> 00:02:33,187
- Truth.
- The problem is,
78
00:02:33,212 --> 00:02:35,303
is neither one of you wants
to take the initiative.
79
00:02:35,328 --> 00:02:36,776
You're both communication bottoms.
80
00:02:36,812 --> 00:02:38,463
One of you needs to be the top.
81
00:02:38,488 --> 00:02:40,647
What does this have anything
to do with hamburger buns?
82
00:02:40,682 --> 00:02:42,908
Look, we do things
in our own way, right?
83
00:02:42,933 --> 00:02:44,713
It's not like I don't
want Nick to come with me.
84
00:02:44,738 --> 00:02:46,330
And for the record, I would
love to meet your friends.
85
00:02:46,355 --> 00:02:48,221
- That would be great.
- So...
86
00:02:51,460 --> 00:02:52,659
All right, I'm going!
87
00:02:52,694 --> 00:02:54,400
Get off my back!
88
00:02:56,127 --> 00:02:57,415
So what are you guys doing here?
89
00:02:57,440 --> 00:03:00,266
- Never. Never in my entire life.
- Okay.
90
00:03:00,291 --> 00:03:03,268
- Never. Never.
- My blood built this loft.
91
00:03:03,293 --> 00:03:05,816
Maybe as an icebreaker we
tell your mom about the time
92
00:03:05,841 --> 00:03:08,502
we actually arrested
Jay Leno for jaywalking.
93
00:03:08,527 --> 00:03:11,661
One small thing... it's
a footnote, really...
94
00:03:11,885 --> 00:03:13,813
my mom don't know I'm a cop.
95
00:03:14,067 --> 00:03:15,416
What?
96
00:03:15,885 --> 00:03:19,186
- Winston, why?
- She's a-a protective single mom.
97
00:03:19,221 --> 00:03:21,025
She's always freaked
out at the tiniest thing.
98
00:03:21,050 --> 00:03:24,125
My baby! I turn my head for one second.
99
00:03:24,150 --> 00:03:26,362
Lord, where is my baby?!
100
00:03:26,387 --> 00:03:28,283
- Wh...
- I went to look at bikes.
101
00:03:28,308 --> 00:03:29,736
Oh!
102
00:03:29,761 --> 00:03:31,865
She still thinks I'm in sports radio.
103
00:03:31,900 --> 00:03:33,934
I still record shows for her.
104
00:03:33,959 --> 00:03:35,653
You got to promise not to blow my cover.
105
00:03:35,678 --> 00:03:38,534
- Wait, what are you doing?
- I have so much police stuff.
106
00:03:38,559 --> 00:03:40,831
Now, I realize you're
getting caught up in a lie
107
00:03:40,856 --> 00:03:42,520
against your will, but...
108
00:03:42,545 --> 00:03:44,345
my mom is coming to see you.
109
00:03:44,370 --> 00:03:46,278
Okay? It won't even come up.
110
00:03:46,903 --> 00:03:48,949
But if it does, you're my producer.
111
00:03:49,386 --> 00:03:51,503
- Bishop!
- I'm-a hide that.
112
00:03:51,528 --> 00:03:53,173
I love him, I love him, I love him,
113
00:03:53,198 --> 00:03:54,331
I love him, I love him...
114
00:03:54,356 --> 00:03:55,940
Pretty slim pickings at the drugstore.
115
00:03:55,965 --> 00:03:57,958
All I got was, uh, Freckle Me Once:
116
00:03:57,993 --> 00:04:00,011
The Unauthorized Lindsay Lohan Story.
117
00:04:00,036 --> 00:04:01,307
Anyway, I got all your stuff...
118
00:04:01,332 --> 00:04:03,331
your bandages, your hydrogen
peroxide, your gummy peaches...
119
00:04:03,356 --> 00:04:05,526
You're making too big
a fuss out of this.
120
00:04:05,551 --> 00:04:07,500
I mean, I've had so much worse.
121
00:04:07,536 --> 00:04:08,854
This is just a bruised toe.
122
00:04:08,879 --> 00:04:10,347
It's your index toe.
123
00:04:10,372 --> 00:04:12,417
Very serious. That's
the toe you point with.
124
00:04:12,442 --> 00:04:15,228
You've been great to me.
You've taken care of me.
125
00:04:15,253 --> 00:04:17,245
Now I'm gonna do something for you.
126
00:04:17,270 --> 00:04:19,546
I'm gonna get you a ticket.
127
00:04:19,581 --> 00:04:21,862
Oh, here it is. Portland to L.A.
128
00:04:21,887 --> 00:04:25,051
Dad, I am not leaving you like this.
129
00:04:25,087 --> 00:04:27,220
Recovery is the most
vulnerable part of the process,
130
00:04:27,256 --> 00:04:30,056
and this house is full of
stairs and sharp corners.
131
00:04:30,092 --> 00:04:31,697
And you know how
slippery your bathtub is.
132
00:04:31,722 --> 00:04:33,923
I won't stand up! I'll just roll out!
133
00:04:33,948 --> 00:04:37,994
Dad, I'm sorry, but I need to
show you a little tough love.
134
00:04:38,220 --> 00:04:39,697
Get in bed.
135
00:04:40,440 --> 00:04:41,642
Do it.
136
00:04:42,941 --> 00:04:45,933
"She was born on the
freakiest of Fridays..."
137
00:04:45,958 --> 00:04:48,105
Okay, we're in 42
markets, big show coming up
138
00:04:48,130 --> 00:04:50,364
- with Stephen A's brother Stephen... B.
- ... B.
139
00:04:50,413 --> 00:04:51,954
our lead-in is a cooking show
140
00:04:51,979 --> 00:04:54,105
- called The Ugly Dumpling...
- So funny.
141
00:04:54,130 --> 00:04:55,613
Hey, is all of this necessary?
142
00:04:55,638 --> 00:04:57,083
That's just in case it comes up.
143
00:04:57,119 --> 00:04:58,400
Which, like I said... (chuckles)
144
00:04:58,425 --> 00:04:59,471
it won't.
145
00:04:59,496 --> 00:05:01,377
Mm... I feel like it might.
146
00:05:01,402 --> 00:05:03,039
- Mother-in-law troubles, huh?
- What?
147
00:05:03,064 --> 00:05:05,314
- Second mom drahm?
- Hey, seriously why are you still here?
148
00:05:05,339 --> 00:05:07,460
That's your most pressing
question right now?
149
00:05:07,496 --> 00:05:09,462
Not why did I sign up
for this ill-advised
150
00:05:09,498 --> 00:05:11,072
talk radio alternative reality?
151
00:05:11,097 --> 00:05:12,517
Guys, we're trying to prep, okay?
152
00:05:12,542 --> 00:05:13,800
So if you're gonna be in our home,
153
00:05:13,835 --> 00:05:15,852
please, step back from the mic.
154
00:05:15,877 --> 00:05:18,471
That's radio lingo for when
someone's on the microphone
155
00:05:18,498 --> 00:05:19,631
and you don't want them to be;
156
00:05:19,656 --> 00:05:20,756
- you say, "Step away from..."
- I got it.
157
00:05:20,781 --> 00:05:21,865
CHARMAINE: Baby!
158
00:05:21,890 --> 00:05:23,777
You are a radio personality!
159
00:05:23,802 --> 00:05:25,943
You just can't leave
your front door open
160
00:05:25,968 --> 00:05:28,602
for any ol' Menendez
brothers to walk into.
161
00:05:28,627 --> 00:05:30,482
- Ooh...!
- (chuckling)
162
00:05:33,201 --> 00:05:35,185
(grunts, chuckles)
163
00:05:35,210 --> 00:05:37,010
- This is Aly.
- Hey!
164
00:05:37,035 --> 00:05:39,969
Long time listener, first time visitor.
165
00:05:39,994 --> 00:05:41,902
- Oh. (chuckles)
- (chuckles)
166
00:05:41,927 --> 00:05:43,529
Radio. She referenced radio.
167
00:05:43,554 --> 00:05:46,498
Uh, yeah, Mom, you know, we talk
about work all day long, so...
168
00:05:46,523 --> 00:05:49,074
Well, it's not work
when it's with your girl.
169
00:05:49,099 --> 00:05:50,871
Now, Aly, tell me,
170
00:05:50,907 --> 00:05:53,326
do you two ever sing the call letters
171
00:05:53,351 --> 00:05:55,559
to each other to fall asleep?
172
00:05:55,584 --> 00:05:57,295
Mm, mm-hmm. Yep.
173
00:05:57,320 --> 00:06:00,246
KQWP...
174
00:06:00,662 --> 00:06:02,505
Oh, I thought you two moved.
175
00:06:04,740 --> 00:06:06,224
176
00:06:06,249 --> 00:06:07,334
(whistles)
177
00:06:07,752 --> 00:06:10,287
Whoa, drug companies
have a lot of money.
178
00:06:11,611 --> 00:06:12,852
_
179
00:06:12,877 --> 00:06:14,220
Well, this is great.
180
00:06:14,245 --> 00:06:16,545
I feel like you finally
brought me to your home planet.
181
00:06:16,580 --> 00:06:18,681
Yeah. I'm really glad you came.
182
00:06:18,716 --> 00:06:21,885
All right. So tell me about these
pharm reps I'm about to meet.
183
00:06:21,910 --> 00:06:24,186
I mean, I don't know what I
can really tell you about them.
184
00:06:24,221 --> 00:06:26,555
We sort of became friends
at these conventions,
185
00:06:26,590 --> 00:06:29,024
and we go from city to
city with each other.
186
00:06:29,049 --> 00:06:31,126
It's kind of like camp friends?
187
00:06:31,151 --> 00:06:34,578
Except everybody's, uh,
slept together a whole lot.
188
00:06:34,625 --> 00:06:36,732
It's exactly like camp friends, I guess.
189
00:06:36,767 --> 00:06:38,578
All these people have
had sex with each other?
190
00:06:38,603 --> 00:06:40,748
- Mostly, yeah.
- Mostly. And with you?
191
00:06:40,783 --> 00:06:42,610
You had sex with the... yeah?
192
00:06:42,635 --> 00:06:44,102
- Why wouldn't you?
- Yeah.
193
00:06:44,127 --> 00:06:46,826
Oh, you guys are like groupies,
but for yourself. I dig it.
194
00:06:46,851 --> 00:06:49,545
Are we gonna have to, like,
talk this out right now? Or...
195
00:06:49,580 --> 00:06:51,380
- I'm good. Are you good?
- Yeah.
196
00:06:51,415 --> 00:06:52,797
- I'm cool.
- Okay.
197
00:06:52,822 --> 00:06:55,226
Ah, I'm not a talker.
Talking's not my thing.
198
00:06:55,251 --> 00:06:56,718
Great. This is why we work.
199
00:06:56,743 --> 00:06:58,076
'Cause we're not like Schmidt and Cece.
200
00:06:58,101 --> 00:07:00,170
We don't have to write
each other a love poem
201
00:07:00,195 --> 00:07:01,422
every time I go into the other room.
202
00:07:01,447 --> 00:07:03,397
- Oh, pass.
- JACK: Reags.
203
00:07:03,422 --> 00:07:05,031
- Hey.
- Hey.
204
00:07:05,056 --> 00:07:06,102
- How are you?
- Oh.
205
00:07:06,127 --> 00:07:07,540
- Oh.
- (laughs)
206
00:07:07,728 --> 00:07:09,398
Off the ground.
207
00:07:09,423 --> 00:07:10,735
- Jack.
- I'm Nick,
208
00:07:10,760 --> 00:07:12,868
and I-I might win a raffle tonight.
209
00:07:12,903 --> 00:07:14,636
(laughing)
210
00:07:17,795 --> 00:07:20,376
So, Reagan, you gonna save
me a pas de deux tonight?
211
00:07:20,411 --> 00:07:21,506
Okay.
212
00:07:21,531 --> 00:07:22,777
(laughter)
213
00:07:22,802 --> 00:07:24,079
What's going on? What
are you guys laughing at?
214
00:07:24,115 --> 00:07:25,287
I don't get the joke.
215
00:07:25,312 --> 00:07:26,417
Well, you do know that she was
216
00:07:26,442 --> 00:07:28,796
a professionally trained ballet dancer?
217
00:07:30,043 --> 00:07:32,422
You never told me you were a ballerina.
218
00:07:32,447 --> 00:07:34,851
I sort of shattered both
of my ankles in this thing
219
00:07:34,876 --> 00:07:36,076
I refer to as "The Crackening."
220
00:07:36,101 --> 00:07:37,976
Your ankles? Like, both your ankles?
221
00:07:38,001 --> 00:07:40,369
And both of my knees and
a little bit of my pelvis.
222
00:07:40,394 --> 00:07:41,772
What?
223
00:07:42,538 --> 00:07:44,168
I could be the Queen of Egypt
224
00:07:44,193 --> 00:07:45,968
and your mom wouldn't know,
because all she wants to do
225
00:07:46,003 --> 00:07:48,270
is talk about the radio
show that doesn't exist.
226
00:07:48,305 --> 00:07:50,305
That's on me. Maybe I should have made
227
00:07:50,341 --> 00:07:52,212
my fake radio show less intriguing.
228
00:07:52,237 --> 00:07:54,972
It's 7:12 and you know what that means.
229
00:07:54,997 --> 00:07:56,612
Traffic on the 12 with Linda.
230
00:07:56,647 --> 00:07:57,788
(clears throat)
231
00:07:57,813 --> 00:08:00,292
(higher voice): It's just way
too much damn traffic out here.
232
00:08:00,331 --> 00:08:01,604
I can't get to work.
233
00:08:01,629 --> 00:08:03,239
(laughs) Linda.
234
00:08:03,264 --> 00:08:04,884
Your big ass on the bus, stop playing.
235
00:08:04,909 --> 00:08:06,773
Babe, how will I ever
break through to your mom
236
00:08:06,798 --> 00:08:08,657
if I keep lying to her? This is crazy.
237
00:08:08,692 --> 00:08:10,426
- That's on me, too.
- I know it's on you.
238
00:08:10,461 --> 00:08:11,927
You're the only person it could be on.
239
00:08:11,962 --> 00:08:13,726
- And that is my bad.
- I know it's your bad.
240
00:08:13,751 --> 00:08:15,793
Aly. You have seven identical
241
00:08:15,818 --> 00:08:17,843
stripe long sleeve shirts?
242
00:08:17,868 --> 00:08:19,493
Yeah. I-I know it's strange.
243
00:08:19,525 --> 00:08:21,300
Um, it-it was a deal.
244
00:08:21,325 --> 00:08:22,678
- Buy five, get two free.
- Oh.
245
00:08:22,703 --> 00:08:24,119
- You still got the receipt?
- Of course I do.
246
00:08:24,144 --> 00:08:26,612
BB Taxx has the same items,
247
00:08:26,637 --> 00:08:28,092
four for $20.
248
00:08:28,615 --> 00:08:30,079
Wait. Are you a DDS?
249
00:08:30,114 --> 00:08:32,109
DDS since '73.
250
00:08:32,416 --> 00:08:33,861
What? Are you both secret dentists?
251
00:08:33,886 --> 00:08:36,354
CHARMAINE AND ALY:
Deep discount shoppers.
252
00:08:36,987 --> 00:08:39,054
- OG price, $350.98.
- Ooh.
253
00:08:39,100 --> 00:08:40,369
- BB Taxx price,
- Uh-huh.
254
00:08:40,394 --> 00:08:42,372
- $72.99
- CHARMAINE: Ooh.
255
00:08:42,397 --> 00:08:44,726
- $72.99!
- Ooh.
256
00:08:45,227 --> 00:08:48,338
And someone didn't limit their
price match to California.
257
00:08:48,363 --> 00:08:50,255
Arkansas prices, y'all.
258
00:08:50,280 --> 00:08:51,896
What do you say we
get back in our cubbies
259
00:08:51,921 --> 00:08:54,474
- and keep this fashion show going.
- Okay.
260
00:08:55,372 --> 00:08:56,967
I don't know why I'm just
putting this together,
261
00:08:56,992 --> 00:08:59,039
but you two are very cheap.
262
00:08:59,723 --> 00:09:01,020
- You're about to feel...
- You dunno what you're talking about.
263
00:09:01,045 --> 00:09:02,599
- ... my cheap purse on your temple.
- You do not know.
264
00:09:02,624 --> 00:09:03,679
Easy now.
265
00:09:03,704 --> 00:09:05,643
What do you think, Nick?
Should she take it?
266
00:09:05,716 --> 00:09:06,953
Take what?
267
00:09:06,978 --> 00:09:08,288
I don't know what you're talking about.
268
00:09:08,313 --> 00:09:09,936
Reagan's big promotion.
269
00:09:10,348 --> 00:09:11,690
Her promotion?
270
00:09:11,715 --> 00:09:13,989
- Should she take it?
- I never...
271
00:09:14,161 --> 00:09:16,697
I didn't hear about it until right now.
272
00:09:16,722 --> 00:09:18,737
It's just VP of North American sales.
273
00:09:18,762 --> 00:09:20,596
- VP?
- It's not a big deal.
274
00:09:20,631 --> 00:09:22,744
It's just like a heartbeat
away from president
275
00:09:22,769 --> 00:09:24,199
of North American sales, so...
276
00:09:24,235 --> 00:09:26,367
- Seems like a pretty big deal.
- Reagan, it's huge.
277
00:09:26,392 --> 00:09:28,871
You get to travel all the
time. So many hotel points.
278
00:09:28,906 --> 00:09:31,011
Mo' points, mo' problems,
that's what I always say.
279
00:09:31,036 --> 00:09:32,407
It's exciting finding out this way.
280
00:09:32,443 --> 00:09:34,804
Most people would probably
tell their boyfriend
281
00:09:34,829 --> 00:09:37,095
when they first found out
about it, but that's cool.
282
00:09:37,120 --> 00:09:39,020
We don't talk, that's why
we work, and that's cool...
283
00:09:39,045 --> 00:09:41,768
and, uh, I'm really bothered by this.
284
00:09:43,025 --> 00:09:44,580
- Nick.
- (gasps)
285
00:09:49,245 --> 00:09:51,241
(ringtone plays)
286
00:09:56,281 --> 00:09:57,689
Hey, Jess, it's me again.
287
00:09:57,714 --> 00:09:59,660
Sorry to call you again. I just...
288
00:09:59,685 --> 00:10:02,569
I just really wish
you would call me back.
289
00:10:03,300 --> 00:10:05,442
I'm having a problem, and...
290
00:10:05,467 --> 00:10:07,040
I feel like you really like when I'm,
291
00:10:07,065 --> 00:10:08,251
you know, I'm having a problem.
292
00:10:08,276 --> 00:10:10,473
Not that you, not that you like it, but,
293
00:10:10,737 --> 00:10:12,809
but that-that you like,
you like talking about it.
294
00:10:12,844 --> 00:10:14,593
Anyway, I'm just coming apart here.
295
00:10:14,618 --> 00:10:17,814
I'm-I'm really a hundred
percent falling apart,
296
00:10:17,849 --> 00:10:20,005
and I really wish you
would call me back.
297
00:10:20,030 --> 00:10:21,404
- (phone beeps)
- All right.
298
00:10:22,924 --> 00:10:24,267
Hey, Schmidty, what's up?
299
00:10:24,292 --> 00:10:25,396
Just checking in.
300
00:10:25,421 --> 00:10:26,492
- Okay.
- (phone beeps)
301
00:10:26,517 --> 00:10:27,934
Oh, hold on, I got another call.
302
00:10:27,959 --> 00:10:29,551
All of a sudden my phone's blowing up.
303
00:10:29,576 --> 00:10:30,787
Hi. This is Nick Miller.
304
00:10:30,812 --> 00:10:32,583
Who am I speaking to
and why are you calling?
305
00:10:32,623 --> 00:10:34,356
- Do you not have my number saved?
- Who is this?
306
00:10:34,381 --> 00:10:35,780
- Who is this?
- Who am I speaking to?
307
00:10:35,805 --> 00:10:37,683
It's... it's Cece.
308
00:10:37,708 --> 00:10:39,046
Cece, why are you both calling me?
309
00:10:39,071 --> 00:10:41,134
How do you not have my
number saved? I work for you.
310
00:10:41,159 --> 00:10:43,059
Cece, I already got Nick.
Let me patch you in.
311
00:10:43,084 --> 00:10:45,062
How am I supposed to learn to do
a patch if you never let me try?
312
00:10:45,087 --> 00:10:47,435
Nick, as the only person
who takes our advice,
313
00:10:47,460 --> 00:10:49,125
- how you doing?
- Well, you were right.
314
00:10:49,150 --> 00:10:50,488
Reagan and I never talk.
315
00:10:50,513 --> 00:10:51,902
We helped you. Cece, we helped him.
316
00:10:51,927 --> 00:10:54,750
- I know, I heard.
- No. You messed everything up.
317
00:10:54,775 --> 00:10:56,519
You stupid idiots made me realize
318
00:10:56,555 --> 00:10:58,148
that I need more than that.
319
00:10:58,173 --> 00:11:00,385
Now I got to go back to
this party with her friends
320
00:11:00,410 --> 00:11:02,260
and pretend like it doesn't bother me.
321
00:11:02,285 --> 00:11:04,728
- Those look fantastic.
- CECE: Oh, honey, that sounds so rough.
322
00:11:04,763 --> 00:11:06,129
I said ho... one second, my man.
323
00:11:06,164 --> 00:11:09,068
In the middle of a conversation.
324
00:11:09,543 --> 00:11:11,859
(Beethoven's "Moonlight Sonata" plays)
325
00:11:19,626 --> 00:11:21,945
Dad, I know you got out of bed.
326
00:11:21,970 --> 00:11:23,446
No, I-I didn't, I didn't.
327
00:11:23,482 --> 00:11:25,571
I-I-I've been, I've been sleeping.
328
00:11:26,536 --> 00:11:28,752
I found these little
crummies in the kitchen.
329
00:11:28,777 --> 00:11:30,964
You only gave me a salad and tea.
330
00:11:30,989 --> 00:11:32,737
I-I-I-I wanted some fish sticks.
331
00:11:32,762 --> 00:11:35,298
Fish sticks are mostly
pork and you know it.
332
00:11:35,323 --> 00:11:38,000
Now, I'm gonna trim your nails.
333
00:11:38,490 --> 00:11:40,166
Oh, no. Wait, wait, wait.
334
00:11:40,191 --> 00:11:41,217
Uh, uh, uh,
335
00:11:41,242 --> 00:11:42,298
- it's-it's a little too short.
- (clippers snap)
336
00:11:42,334 --> 00:11:43,788
It's too... ow, ow!
337
00:11:43,813 --> 00:11:45,502
(screaming)
338
00:11:45,527 --> 00:11:47,612
I have a good thing going
with your mom right now,
339
00:11:47,637 --> 00:11:48,738
and I don't want to ruin that.
340
00:11:48,774 --> 00:11:50,869
- We should just tell her the truth.
- CECE: Hey-o!
341
00:11:50,894 --> 00:11:52,062
Problem alert.
342
00:11:52,087 --> 00:11:53,965
Well, if you need help,
you've come to the right place.
343
00:11:53,990 --> 00:11:56,524
Share, share. Please. Tell us
what seems to be the problem.
344
00:11:56,549 --> 00:11:58,015
Here's what you're
doing, and it's not okay.
345
00:11:58,040 --> 00:11:59,993
You're inserting yourself
into a family matter.
346
00:12:00,018 --> 00:12:01,274
We can handle this on our own.
347
00:12:01,300 --> 00:12:02,926
- We're here if you need us.
- Yeah, watch your front,
348
00:12:02,951 --> 00:12:04,250
- 'cause we've got your back.
- We got your back.
349
00:12:04,275 --> 00:12:06,410
I just want you to know
that I respect that.
350
00:12:06,435 --> 00:12:08,729
I'm perceiving that. Um...
351
00:12:08,757 --> 00:12:10,593
I'm digesting that.
352
00:12:10,746 --> 00:12:12,462
It's in the machine.
353
00:12:12,497 --> 00:12:14,631
It's working its way down.
354
00:12:15,256 --> 00:12:16,932
And okay. I think you're right.
355
00:12:16,957 --> 00:12:18,468
I think it'll be really good
356
00:12:18,513 --> 00:12:19,780
for you to be honest with your mom.
357
00:12:19,805 --> 00:12:21,407
No. See, um,
358
00:12:21,432 --> 00:12:22,624
you're gonna come clean.
359
00:12:22,649 --> 00:12:23,673
I'm gonna stay dirty.
360
00:12:23,708 --> 00:12:24,816
- Why?
- CHARMAINE: Aly,
361
00:12:24,841 --> 00:12:26,797
I found a roly-poly in these pants,
362
00:12:26,822 --> 00:12:28,736
they gave me 89% off.
363
00:12:28,761 --> 00:12:30,149
- Oh.
- (laughs)
364
00:12:30,174 --> 00:12:32,067
That's sweet. Um...
365
00:12:32,550 --> 00:12:34,806
Charmaine, I have to tell you something.
366
00:12:35,287 --> 00:12:38,223
I don't work in radio.
367
00:12:38,248 --> 00:12:39,402
I don't.
368
00:12:39,427 --> 00:12:41,873
I'm actually a cop.
369
00:12:43,791 --> 00:12:45,728
What?
370
00:12:45,764 --> 00:12:47,889
Man, you wearing a wire?
371
00:12:48,366 --> 00:12:49,754
Okay.
372
00:12:50,862 --> 00:12:52,063
(whispering): Sorry.
373
00:12:52,946 --> 00:12:55,547
Well, I appreciate you
telling me the truth.
374
00:12:56,459 --> 00:12:58,419
The job is dangerous.
375
00:12:59,741 --> 00:13:02,340
But I do salute your courage.
376
00:13:07,981 --> 00:13:10,215
(exhales) Okay. Um...
377
00:13:11,888 --> 00:13:13,388
you can salute me, too.
378
00:13:13,413 --> 00:13:14,852
'Cause, uh,
379
00:13:14,877 --> 00:13:16,744
- I'm also a cop.
- What?!
380
00:13:16,769 --> 00:13:18,705
Uh, uh, uh, I'm-I'm
not a super successful
381
00:13:18,730 --> 00:13:19,896
morning radio shock jock.
382
00:13:19,921 --> 00:13:22,336
- There's no radio show?
- No. I'm a...
383
00:13:22,361 --> 00:13:24,300
- I'm an officer of the law.
- What?!
384
00:13:24,325 --> 00:13:26,707
That's not how you reacted
when Aly said she was a cop.
385
00:13:26,732 --> 00:13:29,700
Being a parent is like wearing
your heart outside your body,
386
00:13:29,725 --> 00:13:32,823
and now you're telling me that my heart
387
00:13:32,848 --> 00:13:35,198
is on these streets by himself?
388
00:13:35,223 --> 00:13:37,514
Sampling drugs with a knife
389
00:13:37,539 --> 00:13:39,371
to see if it's really cocaine?
390
00:13:39,396 --> 00:13:40,583
My heart...
391
00:13:40,619 --> 00:13:43,650
knows what cocaine tastes like?
392
00:13:47,052 --> 00:13:48,358
- Oh, man.
- (door slams)
393
00:13:48,383 --> 00:13:50,483
- That's on you, man.
- Please shut up.
394
00:13:50,508 --> 00:13:52,034
REAGAN: It isn't a dream job.
395
00:13:52,059 --> 00:13:53,852
Sure, it comes with a great salary
396
00:13:53,877 --> 00:13:55,912
and a vaccination for
the coming elk flu,
397
00:13:55,937 --> 00:13:58,316
the flu that you're gonna be
hearing about for the next decade.
398
00:13:58,341 --> 00:14:00,330
But it also requires too much travel,
399
00:14:00,355 --> 00:14:01,371
and I'm gonna turn it down.
400
00:14:01,396 --> 00:14:03,721
- Are you happy now?
- No. I'm not happy.
401
00:14:03,746 --> 00:14:06,276
'Cause this is the kind of
talk I wish we had before.
402
00:14:06,311 --> 00:14:07,742
These are the important talks.
403
00:14:07,767 --> 00:14:09,133
This is so unlike you.
404
00:14:09,158 --> 00:14:10,930
Why are you being the
girl in this argument?
405
00:14:10,955 --> 00:14:13,793
I don't know, Reagan. I don't know.
406
00:14:13,818 --> 00:14:15,885
But I do know you're
being heteronormative.
407
00:14:15,921 --> 00:14:17,655
Okay? I know that word...
it's in the Zeitgeist,
408
00:14:17,680 --> 00:14:18,873
and I know that word, too.
409
00:14:18,899 --> 00:14:20,603
I don't know why I'm acting this way.
410
00:14:20,628 --> 00:14:22,094
ANNOUNCER: If you're
out there, Nick Miller,
411
00:14:22,119 --> 00:14:24,237
you're our raffle winner!
412
00:14:24,262 --> 00:14:26,356
Well, I can't say I'm surprised.
413
00:14:26,761 --> 00:14:29,599
I did spend $190 on tickets.
414
00:14:31,111 --> 00:14:32,410
$200.
415
00:14:33,305 --> 00:14:35,468
I spent $250 on tickets.
416
00:14:35,493 --> 00:14:36,519
That's it.
417
00:14:37,175 --> 00:14:38,963
I spent over $300 on tickets.
418
00:14:40,074 --> 00:14:42,783
"Deciding which house to
go to for Thanksgiving,
419
00:14:42,808 --> 00:14:45,070
"she was stuck in a real parent trap."
420
00:14:45,095 --> 00:14:47,641
- Enough. Enough. Enough.
- Oh, you're right.
421
00:14:47,672 --> 00:14:49,052
- This chapter's dragging.
- Jess, please.
422
00:14:49,081 --> 00:14:51,483
- Let me move on.
- I-I need my freedom.
423
00:14:51,508 --> 00:14:54,012
I need my judge shows, my fish sticks.
424
00:14:54,037 --> 00:14:55,452
My-my naked time.
425
00:14:55,488 --> 00:14:58,571
- Oh, please don't expand on that.
- No, it's a good thing.
426
00:14:58,596 --> 00:15:01,246
Ashley showed me how to embrace my body.
427
00:15:01,271 --> 00:15:03,000
And I... every day, for
about a half an hour,
428
00:15:03,025 --> 00:15:04,728
I walk around here naked.
429
00:15:04,764 --> 00:15:07,101
- Fabulous.
- Did you sit on this chair?
430
00:15:07,126 --> 00:15:10,954
Jess... now I'm gonna
show you some tough love.
431
00:15:11,380 --> 00:15:13,671
I want you to go back to California.
432
00:15:13,696 --> 00:15:15,132
(sighs)
433
00:15:15,157 --> 00:15:17,076
Wh-what's going on?
434
00:15:18,725 --> 00:15:20,778
It's Nick. I...
435
00:15:21,197 --> 00:15:22,802
- What?
- I'm-I'm in love with him,
436
00:15:22,827 --> 00:15:24,343
and I can't...
437
00:15:25,380 --> 00:15:29,048
I can't do anything about it.
438
00:15:29,073 --> 00:15:30,118
I'm sorry.
439
00:15:30,143 --> 00:15:31,793
He's really happy with someone else.
440
00:15:31,818 --> 00:15:33,937
- I couldn't go back there.
- Hey, hey, hey.
441
00:15:34,030 --> 00:15:36,090
It's okay. You don't have to.
442
00:15:36,388 --> 00:15:39,272
You can stay here as long as you want.
443
00:15:39,747 --> 00:15:42,858
You've been taking care of me,
now I'm gonna take care of you.
444
00:15:43,001 --> 00:15:45,206
You know what, I'm gonna read you
445
00:15:45,231 --> 00:15:46,904
one of my favorite books. See?
446
00:15:46,939 --> 00:15:48,399
- Oh...
- Before the Web:
447
00:15:48,424 --> 00:15:50,650
The Story of Telephone Operators.
448
00:15:51,978 --> 00:15:55,046
"She sat by the switchboard,
449
00:15:55,415 --> 00:15:57,447
"anxiously awaiting...
450
00:15:57,567 --> 00:15:59,371
"the phone call.
451
00:15:59,569 --> 00:16:02,237
"Ring. Ring.
452
00:16:05,728 --> 00:16:07,152
"Ring."
453
00:16:07,177 --> 00:16:09,786
I don't even understand
what we're arguing about.
454
00:16:09,821 --> 00:16:11,917
I'm mad about the promotion.
455
00:16:11,942 --> 00:16:13,501
And that you have been sitting on it
456
00:16:13,526 --> 00:16:15,532
for a month and not telling me.
457
00:16:15,568 --> 00:16:17,234
I thought that you liked
that we have our own thing.
458
00:16:17,269 --> 00:16:18,869
- I don't know, maybe I...
- That we were two...
459
00:16:18,897 --> 00:16:20,752
independent, different
people and we live our lives
460
00:16:20,777 --> 00:16:22,206
and then we come
together and we hang out.
461
00:16:22,241 --> 00:16:24,045
I just want more, I guess.
462
00:16:24,070 --> 00:16:25,476
I want to talk about stuff,
463
00:16:25,511 --> 00:16:27,014
and I know while I'm saying this
464
00:16:27,039 --> 00:16:29,187
I hate that I'm saying
it, but I feel it.
465
00:16:29,212 --> 00:16:30,749
Nick, we're talking
about stuff right now.
466
00:16:30,783 --> 00:16:32,606
No, we're not talking
about all the stuff.
467
00:16:32,631 --> 00:16:34,776
- We're talking about some of the stuff.
- How much stuff is there?
468
00:16:34,801 --> 00:16:36,171
There's piles of stuff.
469
00:16:36,196 --> 00:16:38,345
There's piles upon piles of stuff.
470
00:16:38,370 --> 00:16:40,056
Like, I want to talk
about... I want to talk about
471
00:16:40,081 --> 00:16:41,463
why we don't have
nicknames for each other?
472
00:16:41,488 --> 00:16:43,775
I mean, why don't we call
each other Mr. Cub and Sparky?
473
00:16:43,800 --> 00:16:45,457
Who's Mr. Cub? You're Mr. Cub?
474
00:16:45,492 --> 00:16:46,509
You think I would be Sparky?
475
00:16:46,534 --> 00:16:48,167
If we had nicknames
it would not be those.
476
00:16:48,192 --> 00:16:50,190
You just call me Nick, is my point.
477
00:16:50,215 --> 00:16:52,148
- That's your name.
- I know, but I would like
478
00:16:52,173 --> 00:16:53,775
to talk about nicknames.
479
00:16:53,800 --> 00:16:54,831
It doesn't matter.
480
00:16:54,856 --> 00:16:57,346
All this matters. This is the stuff.
481
00:16:57,371 --> 00:16:59,321
I want to talk about why
you have a second apartment.
482
00:16:59,350 --> 00:17:01,275
- We talked about that.
- And it was weird then.
483
00:17:01,300 --> 00:17:02,781
We barely talked about it.
484
00:17:02,806 --> 00:17:03,943
I also want to talk about the fact
485
00:17:03,981 --> 00:17:05,921
I've never been at my
best sexually with you.
486
00:17:05,946 --> 00:17:07,145
I've been, like, a seven,
487
00:17:07,180 --> 00:17:08,441
but, at other times in my life,
488
00:17:08,466 --> 00:17:09,714
I've been an eight-and-a-half.
489
00:17:09,750 --> 00:17:11,651
- Okay.
- But you've only seen a seven.
490
00:17:11,676 --> 00:17:13,860
So you think of me as a seven in bed.
491
00:17:14,121 --> 00:17:16,935
- But I'm an eight-and-a-half.
- I'm really tired.
492
00:17:16,960 --> 00:17:18,405
Can you just write it all down
493
00:17:18,430 --> 00:17:19,933
and I'll fill it out and
I'll get it back to you.
494
00:17:19,958 --> 00:17:21,960
All right, then just answer me
this, and then we'll be done.
495
00:17:21,995 --> 00:17:23,554
'Cause this is important.
496
00:17:23,753 --> 00:17:25,074
If we weren't together
497
00:17:25,099 --> 00:17:27,900
and you were offered
this same promotion,
498
00:17:28,391 --> 00:17:29,911
would you take it?
499
00:17:34,538 --> 00:17:37,112
Yes, I would take it.
500
00:17:39,979 --> 00:17:41,984
Then you should take the job, Reagan.
501
00:17:43,316 --> 00:17:44,882
Okay, I'll take it.
502
00:17:47,633 --> 00:17:49,100
Are we cool?
503
00:17:50,629 --> 00:17:51,895
Yeah.
504
00:17:51,920 --> 00:17:53,491
Dream job.
505
00:17:53,527 --> 00:17:56,075
Good, I'm so happy for
you. This is awesome.
506
00:17:57,160 --> 00:17:58,827
Uh, okay. (clears throat)
507
00:17:58,852 --> 00:18:00,298
But before we go to bed tonight,
508
00:18:00,333 --> 00:18:02,538
can you please just do something
about your raffle prize?
509
00:18:02,563 --> 00:18:04,619
- His name's Stewart.
- Why did you bring it home?
510
00:18:04,644 --> 00:18:06,806
I don't know, I won.
511
00:18:06,940 --> 00:18:08,440
(grunts)
512
00:18:08,475 --> 00:18:10,777
Hey, thought I might find you here.
513
00:18:10,802 --> 00:18:11,871
Oh.
514
00:18:11,896 --> 00:18:13,724
- Hiding your maybes?
- (chuckles)
515
00:18:13,749 --> 00:18:17,157
Sometimes I hide mine in a garbage can.
516
00:18:17,182 --> 00:18:18,753
A new one.
517
00:18:18,973 --> 00:18:21,085
Don't try to talk me out
of worrying about my son.
518
00:18:21,121 --> 00:18:22,453
I won't.
519
00:18:22,478 --> 00:18:25,557
I just want you to
know you're not alone.
520
00:18:25,592 --> 00:18:27,506
I'm out there worrying about him, too,
521
00:18:27,545 --> 00:18:30,428
but we have got each other's backs.
522
00:18:32,923 --> 00:18:35,955
How's that dress gonna fit
you when you ain't got no legs?
523
00:18:37,929 --> 00:18:40,500
Oh. I need to tell you something.
524
00:18:40,525 --> 00:18:42,311
No, no, just...
525
00:18:42,713 --> 00:18:44,300
let me go first.
526
00:18:44,718 --> 00:18:47,360
This job has given me so much.
527
00:18:47,385 --> 00:18:50,425
Purpose, pride, my future wife,
528
00:18:50,750 --> 00:18:53,351
CPR certification...
against my will, I might add,
529
00:18:53,386 --> 00:18:55,858
because I truly believe
that it is witchcraft,
530
00:18:55,883 --> 00:18:57,222
but that's not the point.
531
00:18:57,257 --> 00:18:59,591
I have tried so many things.
532
00:18:59,921 --> 00:19:01,593
But being a cop is the first time
533
00:19:01,628 --> 00:19:04,429
I've ever felt a calling.
534
00:19:04,984 --> 00:19:06,484
I'm proud of you.
535
00:19:08,229 --> 00:19:11,202
Yeah. I-I will deal with my fears.
536
00:19:11,408 --> 00:19:14,075
Um... but there's one more thing.
537
00:19:22,032 --> 00:19:23,632
Oh, my God.
538
00:19:24,350 --> 00:19:27,911
Mom, you've been a cop this whole time?
539
00:19:27,936 --> 00:19:29,300
No.
540
00:19:29,325 --> 00:19:31,321
- You're not a cop.
- It was your dad's.
541
00:19:31,346 --> 00:19:32,490
He's a cop.
542
00:19:32,526 --> 00:19:34,343
Wherever the hell he is.
543
00:19:34,694 --> 00:19:36,587
Wow. Um...
544
00:19:38,199 --> 00:19:40,500
You know, that's the first
thing you ever told me about him.
545
00:19:41,402 --> 00:19:43,034
So you know I got a lot of practice
546
00:19:43,069 --> 00:19:45,069
worrying about someone coming home.
547
00:19:45,105 --> 00:19:48,106
Maybe that's the reason I'm
so overprotective with you.
548
00:19:48,263 --> 00:19:51,090
He left this behind, among other things.
549
00:19:51,311 --> 00:19:53,302
I just use it to get out of tickets.
550
00:19:53,327 --> 00:19:56,491
And one time I did use
it for a discount on a...
551
00:19:56,516 --> 00:19:58,391
- a rental car.
- Oh.
552
00:19:58,753 --> 00:20:00,799
- Take it.
- No, I don't want it.
553
00:20:01,221 --> 00:20:02,695
You're my dad.
554
00:20:02,729 --> 00:20:04,462
You're my mom and my dad.
555
00:20:04,487 --> 00:20:05,785
I know that.
556
00:20:05,810 --> 00:20:08,993
And I'm not saying he's
not a piece of crap, either.
557
00:20:09,029 --> 00:20:10,728
But you should have this.
558
00:20:20,373 --> 00:20:21,773
We can talk about this later,
559
00:20:21,798 --> 00:20:25,279
but what was the rental
car company you used?
560
00:20:27,893 --> 00:20:29,280
(sighs)
561
00:20:29,316 --> 00:20:32,317
Well, I don't think me
and Reagan are working out.
562
00:20:32,352 --> 00:20:35,219
Really? Oh, bub, I'm so sorry.
563
00:20:35,255 --> 00:20:37,666
Come lay your head on
my bosom. Come here.
564
00:20:37,691 --> 00:20:40,336
No, I'll do hers if I was
gonna do either, but...
565
00:20:41,161 --> 00:20:42,961
well, I'm really glad you guys are here.
566
00:20:45,607 --> 00:20:47,065
Tell us everything.
567
00:20:47,100 --> 00:20:49,101
- But first, say that one more time.
- Oh, you really want me to?
568
00:20:49,126 --> 00:20:50,174
- Yeah.
- Yeah.
569
00:20:50,199 --> 00:20:51,239
Oh. Uh, I'm really glad you're here.
570
00:20:51,264 --> 00:20:52,922
We're really glad that we're here, too.
571
00:20:52,947 --> 00:20:54,313
Very happy about it.
572
00:20:54,338 --> 00:20:55,664
- All right.
- One more time.
573
00:20:55,689 --> 00:20:57,408
The part about you being
glad that we're here.
574
00:20:57,444 --> 00:20:59,177
- Making me regret it.
- One more time.
575
00:20:59,212 --> 00:21:01,509
I feel like we talked about
everything. I'm gonna grab a beer.
576
00:21:01,534 --> 00:21:03,071
(Australian accent): I like
American football a lot.
577
00:21:03,096 --> 00:21:05,497
And you know who I like,
I like that Tom Brady.
578
00:21:05,522 --> 00:21:07,681
Uh, I like the way he looks,
I like the way he smells.
579
00:21:07,706 --> 00:21:09,509
Nick, shut up, man!
580
00:21:09,534 --> 00:21:11,066
I'm at... I'm at work.
581
00:21:11,091 --> 00:21:12,412
Mi-mi-mi, mi-mi-mi.
582
00:21:12,437 --> 00:21:14,142
Chacho. (deep voice): Chacho.
583
00:21:14,167 --> 00:21:15,985
This is traffic on the 12. Linda?
584
00:21:16,010 --> 00:21:18,673
Move! Get your ass out the way!
585
00:21:18,732 --> 00:21:20,672
I'm trying to get to work on time.
586
00:21:20,697 --> 00:21:21,741
Linda, you okay?
587
00:21:21,766 --> 00:21:22,778
I'm fine.
588
00:21:22,803 --> 00:21:24,535
It's the reason why
I'm late. I'm in traffic
589
00:21:24,571 --> 00:21:26,104
behind a damn Camry.
590
00:21:26,139 --> 00:21:27,867
If he don't move his ass out the way...
591
00:21:27,892 --> 00:21:29,273
Linda, all right, that's enough of you.
592
00:21:29,309 --> 00:21:30,339
(laughs)
593
00:21:30,364 --> 00:21:32,064
PG-13.
594
00:21:32,114 --> 00:21:36,664
Repair and Synchronization by
Easy Subtitles Synchronizer 1.0.0.0
43969
Can't find what you're looking for?
Get subtitles in any language from opensubtitles.com, and translate them here.