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1
00:00:00,422 --> 00:00:02,047
- Okay, we got our maps.
- Yeah.
2
00:00:02,072 --> 00:00:03,311
- Got our canteens.
- Yeah.
3
00:00:03,336 --> 00:00:05,085
Got our trail mix, homemade of course.
4
00:00:05,110 --> 00:00:06,265
Got my book of local fauna.
5
00:00:06,281 --> 00:00:07,513
Got my book of local flora.
6
00:00:07,549 --> 00:00:08,614
So we can identify...
7
00:00:08,650 --> 00:00:10,366
BOTH:
Every living thing.
8
00:00:10,391 --> 00:00:11,427
SCHMIDT: Look at them.
9
00:00:11,452 --> 00:00:13,519
I feel like Andie MacDowell
in Multiplicity,
10
00:00:13,555 --> 00:00:15,633
living in a house filled with clones.
11
00:00:15,658 --> 00:00:17,102
It is the second time this week
12
00:00:17,127 --> 00:00:19,559
you've compared yourself to
Andie MacDowell. It's weird.
13
00:00:19,594 --> 00:00:20,927
- I'll go grab...
- ... Our boots because we should...
14
00:00:20,962 --> 00:00:22,395
- ... Break them in.
- Exactly.
15
00:00:22,430 --> 00:00:23,896
Nah, that's weird.
16
00:00:23,932 --> 00:00:26,260
Robby and I are hiking
Behar Pass tomorrow.
17
00:00:26,285 --> 00:00:27,757
Turns out, we both love hiking.
18
00:00:27,802 --> 00:00:29,735
It's amazing. We have a lot in common.
19
00:00:29,771 --> 00:00:32,071
Aly and I are finally gonna
have the same city in common.
20
00:00:32,106 --> 00:00:33,472
- Right on, man.
- (Winston laughs)
21
00:00:33,523 --> 00:00:35,398
Lefty's coming home. (laughs)
22
00:00:35,423 --> 00:00:36,576
- Lefty?
- Lefty?
23
00:00:36,611 --> 00:00:37,852
Yeah, she's left-footed.
24
00:00:37,877 --> 00:00:39,892
I'm throwing Aly a surprise
welcome-home dinner.
25
00:00:39,917 --> 00:00:42,473
I invited her whole
family here, you know.
26
00:00:42,498 --> 00:00:44,394
Uh, I wanted her to see
all the people she loves,
27
00:00:44,419 --> 00:00:46,988
which becomes love for me, you know,
28
00:00:47,013 --> 00:00:49,088
and the next thing you know,
I'm getting one of those
29
00:00:49,123 --> 00:00:51,467
"best boyfriend ever"
mugs, which you can buy,
30
00:00:51,492 --> 00:00:52,558
I just don't want to do all that.
31
00:00:52,594 --> 00:00:54,126
I want to... I want to earn it.
32
00:00:54,151 --> 00:00:55,989
- You're inviting them over here?
- Yeah.
33
00:00:56,025 --> 00:00:58,194
Winston, this place is a hellhole.
34
00:00:58,219 --> 00:00:59,799
Look at this. All the dishes are broken.
35
00:00:59,834 --> 00:01:01,801
I'm eating pasta out of some thing
36
00:01:01,836 --> 00:01:03,879
that Jess and Robby
made in a clay class.
37
00:01:03,904 --> 00:01:04,937
BOTH: Pottery workshop.
38
00:01:04,973 --> 00:01:06,652
What the hell is this compartment for?
39
00:01:06,677 --> 00:01:07,738
I have a better idea.
40
00:01:07,763 --> 00:01:09,575
Why don't you throw
your thing at our place?
41
00:01:09,611 --> 00:01:11,183
Ever since our wedding china came in,
42
00:01:11,208 --> 00:01:12,582
we've been dying to host a dinner party.
43
00:01:12,607 --> 00:01:13,705
Is your house even done yet?
44
00:01:13,730 --> 00:01:15,283
All the party zones
are in working order:
45
00:01:15,308 --> 00:01:16,672
living room, dining room.
46
00:01:16,697 --> 00:01:18,933
The master bedroom
has sort of turned into
47
00:01:18,958 --> 00:01:21,187
a place where the workers
throw all their trash.
48
00:01:21,214 --> 00:01:23,030
I think even one of them
went to the toilet in there.
49
00:01:23,055 --> 00:01:24,680
- But...
- We'll just lock that door.
50
00:01:24,705 --> 00:01:25,750
- Yes.
- Let's do it.
51
00:01:25,775 --> 00:01:27,240
Reagan's out of town.
You know what that means.
52
00:01:27,265 --> 00:01:28,771
- No.
- What does that mean?
53
00:01:28,796 --> 00:01:30,763
Honestly, I don't know, but
please let me come to the party.
54
00:01:30,798 --> 00:01:32,598
(gasps) Time to hit the sack.
55
00:01:32,634 --> 00:01:34,600
It's 6:30. Babies are still awake.
56
00:01:34,636 --> 00:01:36,048
BOTH: Not this baby.
57
00:01:36,073 --> 00:01:37,603
(Jess and Robby laugh)
58
00:01:37,639 --> 00:01:39,830
I feel like I've lived
through this before.
59
00:01:40,119 --> 00:01:42,489
I'm like Andie MacDowell
in Groundhog Day.
60
00:01:42,514 --> 00:01:43,896
- Stop! Just please stop.
- NICK: Are you kidding me?
61
00:01:43,911 --> 00:01:45,301
62
00:01:45,349 --> 00:01:47,857
Synced and corrected by Aaronnmb
www.addic7ed.com
63
00:01:47,906 --> 00:01:50,006
BOTH (to the tune of "Ice Ice Baby"):
Hike, hike, baby.
64
00:01:50,050 --> 00:01:53,487
(imitating bass line)
65
00:01:54,157 --> 00:01:55,256
Ooh, it's a fork.
66
00:01:56,363 --> 00:01:57,962
Well, the map says to go left,
67
00:01:57,987 --> 00:02:00,458
but that little musket
trail seems plumb adorable.
68
00:02:00,494 --> 00:02:03,972
And it has a waterfall, so I say, uh....
69
00:02:03,997 --> 00:02:05,530
- waterfall.
- (both chuckle)
70
00:02:05,566 --> 00:02:06,765
I mean, let's just do it. Let's go nuts.
71
00:02:06,791 --> 00:02:07,987
See, this is why we're
so great together.
72
00:02:08,021 --> 00:02:09,097
We agree on everything.
73
00:02:09,122 --> 00:02:10,224
- I agree.
- (chuckles)
74
00:02:10,249 --> 00:02:12,671
Hey, Robert Frost, looks like
we're gonna take the road...
75
00:02:12,706 --> 00:02:13,738
Jess traveled.
76
00:02:13,774 --> 00:02:15,907
(both laugh)
77
00:02:16,662 --> 00:02:18,662
All right, just, uh...
78
00:02:19,313 --> 00:02:20,345
that's not the way it goes.
79
00:02:20,380 --> 00:02:22,113
Hold on.
80
00:02:22,375 --> 00:02:24,375
Be easier if it wasn't so windy.
81
00:02:26,153 --> 00:02:27,752
Okay.
82
00:02:28,015 --> 00:02:29,314
- Hey.
- Hey.
83
00:02:29,339 --> 00:02:30,892
Made a list of rules for our guests.
84
00:02:30,917 --> 00:02:32,591
Obviously, no one's wearing
shoes inside the house,
85
00:02:32,626 --> 00:02:35,894
but what if we put a foot-washing
station in the driveway?
86
00:02:35,929 --> 00:02:39,367
Babe, I was thinking
maybe we have no rules.
87
00:02:39,392 --> 00:02:40,555
Well, because growing up,
88
00:02:40,580 --> 00:02:42,703
all the cool houses didn't
have rules, remember?
89
00:02:42,728 --> 00:02:44,281
I was never invited to
any of the cool houses.
90
00:02:44,306 --> 00:02:45,971
My only friend in high
school was my piano teacher,
91
00:02:46,006 --> 00:02:48,032
and then he got that
boyfriend with the Trans Am,
92
00:02:48,057 --> 00:02:49,069
and I never saw him again.
93
00:02:49,094 --> 00:02:51,078
I really wish I could
travel back in time
94
00:02:51,103 --> 00:02:52,402
and give young you a hug.
95
00:02:52,438 --> 00:02:54,681
Yeah, well young me
would've greeted that hug
96
00:02:54,706 --> 00:02:57,301
- with an immediate collapse in orgasm.
- Oh.
97
00:02:57,326 --> 00:02:58,517
But you know what, maybe you're right.
98
00:02:58,542 --> 00:03:01,578
If we want to be the place
where friends gather...
99
00:03:01,614 --> 00:03:03,034
maybe we got to chill.
100
00:03:03,059 --> 00:03:05,159
Yeah, because we...
we want to be the hub.
101
00:03:05,184 --> 00:03:06,700
- You know?
- Ooh, we'd make such a good hub.
102
00:03:06,725 --> 00:03:08,161
- Yes, we would.
- Make such a good...
103
00:03:08,186 --> 00:03:10,060
we'd make such a good hub.
104
00:03:12,989 --> 00:03:15,099
Are you having an orgasm right now?
105
00:03:16,819 --> 00:03:18,585
Are you kidding me?
106
00:03:18,916 --> 00:03:19,963
- Hey.
- Hey.
107
00:03:19,999 --> 00:03:22,221
Winston Bishop, nice to meet you.
108
00:03:22,986 --> 00:03:25,002
- What are we doing right now?
- I'm practicing introducing myself
109
00:03:25,035 --> 00:03:26,589
- to Aly's parents.
- Oh, I got you.
110
00:03:26,614 --> 00:03:27,979
- You're a little nervous. Okay.
- Yeah, yeah, I'm a little nervous.
111
00:03:28,004 --> 00:03:29,594
You know, I want to make
a good first impression.
112
00:03:29,619 --> 00:03:31,685
- Oh, that makes sense.
- How's my shake?
113
00:03:31,911 --> 00:03:33,110
Nope. No, no, no, no, no.
114
00:03:33,145 --> 00:03:34,217
Do not go in with two hands.
115
00:03:34,242 --> 00:03:35,885
Also, why are your hands so wet?
116
00:03:35,910 --> 00:03:37,447
- Damn, for me that's dry.
- They're dripping.
117
00:03:37,483 --> 00:03:38,949
- How's this for Aly's mom?
- I'm Aly's mom?
118
00:03:38,984 --> 00:03:40,910
- Okay.
- Mm-mm.
119
00:03:40,935 --> 00:03:43,477
- (smooches) Not today, honey.
- Yeah, all wrong.
120
00:03:43,522 --> 00:03:45,155
- We bring it in for the real thing.
- All wrong.
121
00:03:45,180 --> 00:03:46,179
- All wrong.
- Okay.
122
00:03:46,180 --> 00:03:47,280
That was very aggressive.
123
00:03:47,305 --> 00:03:49,888
You invaded my space.
I didn't feel safe.
124
00:03:49,913 --> 00:03:51,757
Just be more normal about it. Like this.
125
00:03:51,782 --> 00:03:53,773
Hey, how are you? I'm
Winston. Nice to meet you.
126
00:03:53,798 --> 00:03:54,906
Oh, like...
127
00:03:54,931 --> 00:03:57,000
Hey, how are you? I'm Winston.
128
00:03:57,036 --> 00:03:58,823
Zip, a pleasure, uh, to do it.
129
00:03:58,848 --> 00:04:00,893
- See, all of that, cut that out.
- Okay.
130
00:04:00,918 --> 00:04:02,573
Hi, how are you? I'm Aly's mother.
131
00:04:02,608 --> 00:04:03,698
(smooches)
132
00:04:03,723 --> 00:04:05,628
You do... you do well. (chuckles)
133
00:04:05,653 --> 00:04:08,213
You do well to-to be friends with me.
134
00:04:08,881 --> 00:04:10,380
- Hmm?
- Winston, shake it out.
135
00:04:10,416 --> 00:04:12,583
- (laughs) I'm nervous, dude.
- I know you are.
136
00:04:12,618 --> 00:04:14,051
Look, they're gonna love you.
137
00:04:14,086 --> 00:04:15,789
Here's what I'm gonna
do. I'm gonna mill about.
138
00:04:15,814 --> 00:04:18,222
I'm gonna talk you up. I'm
gonna tell your stories.
139
00:04:18,257 --> 00:04:20,023
Yes. Use one of my good ones,
140
00:04:20,059 --> 00:04:21,658
the ones that make me look awesome.
141
00:04:21,694 --> 00:04:24,204
(chuckles) Like the time I
fell asleep in the bathtub.
142
00:04:24,229 --> 00:04:26,743
But all that one is is that
you fell asleep in a bathtub.
143
00:04:26,768 --> 00:04:28,727
- The end. End of story.
- That's crazy.
144
00:04:28,752 --> 00:04:30,234
I think we can come up
with better ones, don't you?
145
00:04:30,269 --> 00:04:31,956
No, that's a home run for sure,
146
00:04:31,981 --> 00:04:33,423
because I woke up wet.
147
00:04:33,448 --> 00:04:34,597
- Now I see.
- And also,
148
00:04:34,622 --> 00:04:36,206
- it's all about how you tell it.
- Right.
149
00:04:36,242 --> 00:04:37,608
I trust you. You're the writer.
150
00:04:37,643 --> 00:04:39,343
I am, and that was the gift I was given.
151
00:04:39,378 --> 00:04:40,506
- Put her there.
- You got it.
152
00:04:40,542 --> 00:04:42,819
- What is going on with these hands?
- What?
153
00:04:42,844 --> 00:04:44,414
A second ago, they were dripping wet,
154
00:04:44,450 --> 00:04:46,216
and now they are piping hot.
155
00:04:46,252 --> 00:04:48,165
("La Cucaracha" doorbell plays)
156
00:04:48,190 --> 00:04:50,665
- Leslie!
- Winston!
157
00:04:50,690 --> 00:04:52,689
I hit your car when I parked. Sorry.
158
00:04:52,725 --> 00:04:54,224
Yeah, I... I didn't drive here.
159
00:04:54,260 --> 00:04:56,003
Oh, well, that's a relief.
160
00:04:56,595 --> 00:04:57,895
Anyway, uh,
161
00:04:57,930 --> 00:04:59,897
your sister is on her way.
Where are your parents?
162
00:04:59,932 --> 00:05:03,545
Oh, my dad doesn't take
highways for political reasons.
163
00:05:03,802 --> 00:05:05,402
- But everyone else is here.
- Cool.
164
00:05:05,437 --> 00:05:06,803
Come on in. (laughs)
165
00:05:06,839 --> 00:05:07,971
- Hey.
- Hi there.
166
00:05:08,007 --> 00:05:09,640
- Hey there.
- Hey.
167
00:05:09,675 --> 00:05:10,774
- Thank you.
- Wow.
168
00:05:10,809 --> 00:05:12,376
How big is your family? (chuckles)
169
00:05:12,411 --> 00:05:14,945
Oh, my gosh. Hey.
170
00:05:14,980 --> 00:05:16,747
How many cars did you guys take?
171
00:05:16,782 --> 00:05:19,082
Hey, make yourselves at
home. Everybody come on in.
172
00:05:19,118 --> 00:05:20,784
Did you guys rent a bus?
173
00:05:20,819 --> 00:05:22,419
Just breathe. Just breathe.
174
00:05:22,454 --> 00:05:24,121
- Hey. Hey now.
- SCHMIDT: Winston, Winston.
175
00:05:24,156 --> 00:05:26,057
Winston. A-a word, please.
176
00:05:26,082 --> 00:05:27,491
- Huh? Yeah, coming.
- Hey.
177
00:05:27,526 --> 00:05:28,558
Hey, man, you look familiar.
178
00:05:28,594 --> 00:05:29,885
Did I pull you over last week?
179
00:05:30,190 --> 00:05:31,729
Why so many?
180
00:05:32,994 --> 00:05:34,575
CECE (quietly): There
are 30 people out there.
181
00:05:34,600 --> 00:05:35,458
(blows nose)
182
00:05:35,483 --> 00:05:37,434
SCHMIDT: We do not have enough china!
183
00:05:37,469 --> 00:05:38,635
Or forks or prawns.
184
00:05:38,671 --> 00:05:40,003
You can't ask somebody to split a prawn.
185
00:05:40,039 --> 00:05:42,615
Babe, I know, all right?
But you just need to relax.
186
00:05:42,640 --> 00:05:43,616
- We will be fine.
- (glass breaks)
187
00:05:43,641 --> 00:05:44,778
- We can adjust.
- MAN: Sorry.
188
00:05:44,803 --> 00:05:46,410
Just remember, we're chill.
189
00:05:46,445 --> 00:05:48,779
No, you're right. We are totally chill.
190
00:05:48,814 --> 00:05:51,108
We'll just break out the backup china!
191
00:05:51,450 --> 00:05:53,290
I'll just come in tomorrow
morning with a power washer,
192
00:05:53,315 --> 00:05:55,118
and hose this whole frickin' place down.
193
00:05:55,146 --> 00:05:57,181
- ("La Cucaracha" doorbell plays)
- There's Lefty.
194
00:05:58,082 --> 00:06:00,270
By the way, there is no backup china!
195
00:06:00,295 --> 00:06:01,285
- I know, I know, all right.
- (crowd quiets)
196
00:06:01,310 --> 00:06:02,762
Keep them closed.
197
00:06:02,787 --> 00:06:03,910
ALY: All right, last time you did this,
198
00:06:03,935 --> 00:06:05,839
you revealed Furguson in a tuxedo.
199
00:06:05,864 --> 00:06:07,464
(laughs) This is even better.
200
00:06:07,499 --> 00:06:10,867
Say hello to... your entire family!
201
00:06:10,903 --> 00:06:13,136
ALL: Surprise!
202
00:06:13,887 --> 00:06:15,472
(whispers): What the hell is this?
203
00:06:15,507 --> 00:06:18,559
(quietly): So, do the
cute, surprised look you do.
204
00:06:19,185 --> 00:06:21,111
Nah, that's not it. That's not the one.
205
00:06:21,146 --> 00:06:23,347
Remember? When you...
206
00:06:28,002 --> 00:06:29,990
Oh.
207
00:06:30,251 --> 00:06:31,773
You're pissed.
208
00:06:32,820 --> 00:06:34,586
We're lost.
209
00:06:34,620 --> 00:06:36,954
Why did you let me chase a waterfall?
210
00:06:36,989 --> 00:06:39,457
You know what TLC says.
211
00:06:39,484 --> 00:06:41,434
I'm sorry. Just...
212
00:06:41,459 --> 00:06:42,957
- I'm really hungry.
- Here.
213
00:06:42,983 --> 00:06:44,112
You can have some of my trail mix.
214
00:06:44,137 --> 00:06:45,496
That's just a bag of raisins.
215
00:06:45,531 --> 00:06:47,331
Well, that's because I only like to
eat the peanuts and the chocolate.
216
00:06:47,366 --> 00:06:49,917
Well, I only like the
chocolate and the peanuts, too!
217
00:06:49,942 --> 00:06:51,168
Why do we even add raisins?!
218
00:06:51,204 --> 00:06:52,620
I don't know!
219
00:06:52,645 --> 00:06:54,044
All right, look, you know what,
220
00:06:54,079 --> 00:06:56,146
we're lost and...
221
00:06:56,465 --> 00:06:59,484
it's gonna get dark soon,
so let's... just head back.
222
00:06:59,519 --> 00:07:01,653
Fine. Did you pack a flashlight?
223
00:07:01,695 --> 00:07:03,057
Robby, did you pack a flashlight?
224
00:07:03,082 --> 00:07:04,489
- No.
- Then there's your answer.
225
00:07:04,524 --> 00:07:05,762
You know what, it's fine, okay?
226
00:07:05,787 --> 00:07:08,184
We know that we have to go
downhill, so just follow me.
227
00:07:08,209 --> 00:07:09,261
I'll lead, okay?
228
00:07:09,289 --> 00:07:11,114
- Ah! God! Oh!
- Oh! Robby!
229
00:07:11,139 --> 00:07:12,151
- Oh!
- Oh, my God!
230
00:07:12,184 --> 00:07:13,620
- I lost my glasses.
- Are you okay?
231
00:07:13,645 --> 00:07:14,732
Oh.
232
00:07:14,775 --> 00:07:16,673
Please tell me those
were crunchy leaves.
233
00:07:16,698 --> 00:07:17,897
Let me see.
234
00:07:17,922 --> 00:07:19,147
Oh, I think that's them.
235
00:07:19,172 --> 00:07:20,371
- Hold on. Oh! Jess!
- Ah!
236
00:07:20,407 --> 00:07:23,174
Ah! Ow, my ankle!
237
00:07:23,209 --> 00:07:26,177
My beautiful dancer's ankle!
238
00:07:26,771 --> 00:07:28,479
Hey. What's the matter?
239
00:07:28,515 --> 00:07:30,769
You know, I got all your
family together in one room.
240
00:07:30,794 --> 00:07:32,850
You know, you're being greeted
by all the people that you love.
241
00:07:32,886 --> 00:07:34,886
- I know.
- Well, except for your parents,
242
00:07:34,921 --> 00:07:35,953
but they will be here soon,
243
00:07:35,989 --> 00:07:37,922
barring any surface street traffic.
244
00:07:37,957 --> 00:07:39,490
That is so sweet, Winston.
245
00:07:39,526 --> 00:07:42,604
And I do love my family,
but they're crazy.
246
00:07:42,629 --> 00:07:44,395
And, honestly, they
make me a little crazy.
247
00:07:44,431 --> 00:07:45,563
Every family is crazy.
248
00:07:45,598 --> 00:07:47,799
Every time we get
together, it's a disaster.
249
00:07:47,834 --> 00:07:50,559
Like a giant hot air
balloon catching on fire.
250
00:07:50,584 --> 00:07:53,237
Here's the difference:
you got backup now.
251
00:07:55,396 --> 00:07:57,908
Have I ever let you down as a partner?
252
00:07:58,009 --> 00:07:59,744
Except for that mixed
doubles tournament.
253
00:07:59,779 --> 00:08:00,945
Got it!
254
00:08:04,551 --> 00:08:06,831
We don't got to talk about that.
We ain't got to go back there.
255
00:08:06,856 --> 00:08:09,438
My point is this: we're a team.
256
00:08:09,463 --> 00:08:10,588
Okay?
257
00:08:10,623 --> 00:08:12,023
- Okay.
- All right.
258
00:08:12,048 --> 00:08:13,190
Maybe this time will be different.
259
00:08:13,215 --> 00:08:14,339
- Right?
- Yeah.
260
00:08:14,370 --> 00:08:15,960
But you really need to
know the lay of the land.
261
00:08:15,995 --> 00:08:17,228
Okay, let me take notes.
262
00:08:17,263 --> 00:08:18,863
So, my sister is...
263
00:08:18,888 --> 00:08:20,384
- my sister.
- Mm-hmm.
264
00:08:20,409 --> 00:08:21,966
Uncle Bill is a real weather nerd.
265
00:08:21,991 --> 00:08:23,493
- Super annoying.
- Right, right, right.
266
00:08:23,518 --> 00:08:27,071
Aunt Karen keeps a free-floating
piece of floss in her purse.
267
00:08:27,107 --> 00:08:28,706
She will use it tonight.
268
00:08:28,731 --> 00:08:29,800
- It's revolting.
- Okay.
269
00:08:29,825 --> 00:08:31,320
Do me a favor. Hold on.
270
00:08:31,345 --> 00:08:32,511
Repeat everything you just said.
271
00:08:32,536 --> 00:08:33,808
My thumbprint won't let me in.
272
00:08:33,833 --> 00:08:36,481
Okay, uh, my sister is... you met her...
273
00:08:36,516 --> 00:08:38,394
Ah, wait, yeah, no, no, still not in.
274
00:08:38,419 --> 00:08:40,551
Let me get... wipe my
hand off right there.
275
00:08:40,587 --> 00:08:42,874
Now we're cooking with gas. (chuckles)
276
00:08:42,899 --> 00:08:44,578
- My sister... okay.
- No, we ain't.
277
00:08:44,610 --> 00:08:46,642
- Winston, he's a great guy.
- Mm-hmm.
278
00:08:46,677 --> 00:08:47,900
He and I go way back.
279
00:08:47,931 --> 00:08:50,062
Tons of stories, tons
of... tons of stories.
280
00:08:50,087 --> 00:08:51,701
Really? All right.
281
00:08:51,726 --> 00:08:52,949
- Right now?
- Yeah.
282
00:08:52,974 --> 00:08:54,903
One time he was taking a
bath and he fell asleep.
283
00:08:54,928 --> 00:08:56,160
(wheezing laugh)
284
00:08:56,185 --> 00:08:58,603
You believe this guy? What a nut.
285
00:08:58,638 --> 00:09:00,208
Life of the party, this guy.
286
00:09:00,233 --> 00:09:02,715
He fell asleep in a
bath? That's the story?
287
00:09:02,740 --> 00:09:03,941
That's the story? No.
288
00:09:03,977 --> 00:09:05,998
That's the start of the story.
289
00:09:06,333 --> 00:09:07,644
We are out of appetizers.
290
00:09:07,669 --> 00:09:09,600
They stripped this tray
of shrimp like piranhas.
291
00:09:09,625 --> 00:09:11,092
They didn't even leave tails.
292
00:09:11,127 --> 00:09:13,060
I think someone took a
shower in the bathroom.
293
00:09:13,096 --> 00:09:14,883
We don't have towels or soap.
294
00:09:14,908 --> 00:09:16,399
I don't know how they did it.
295
00:09:16,424 --> 00:09:18,766
We need to re-examine
this whole no rules thing.
296
00:09:18,801 --> 00:09:20,401
It's a freaking circus in here.
297
00:09:20,436 --> 00:09:21,936
What are we gonna feed
these people in the meantime?
298
00:09:21,971 --> 00:09:23,938
In about ten minutes, they're
gonna start eating the drywall.
299
00:09:23,973 --> 00:09:25,287
- I think there was a...
- (plate clanks loudly)
300
00:09:25,312 --> 00:09:27,645
- (chuckles) Thank you.
- Thank you.
301
00:09:27,670 --> 00:09:29,944
I think there was a bag of rice
in the house when we bought it.
302
00:09:29,979 --> 00:09:31,612
I thought that was barley.
303
00:09:31,637 --> 00:09:33,341
It was really dirty.
304
00:09:33,607 --> 00:09:35,718
Okay, fine, whatever. Boil it up!
305
00:09:36,152 --> 00:09:38,652
ROBBY: Okay, well, it's
really dark and uneven,
306
00:09:38,688 --> 00:09:40,521
but at least we found the trail.
307
00:09:40,556 --> 00:09:42,914
Yeah, I mean, it's like
a night hike. (chuckles)
308
00:09:42,939 --> 00:09:45,159
Maybe we'll see a colony
of bats. (chuckles)
309
00:09:45,194 --> 00:09:46,660
It's kind of like a waterfall.
310
00:09:46,696 --> 00:09:48,457
But with monsters, in the sky.
311
00:09:48,482 --> 00:09:50,164
- (thunder cracks)
- Oh! Oh, man.
312
00:09:50,199 --> 00:09:51,332
Okay, uh,
313
00:09:51,367 --> 00:09:52,722
Jess, it's raining.
314
00:09:52,747 --> 00:09:54,488
JESS: Let's take shelter in that cave!
315
00:09:54,513 --> 00:09:56,468
What if it's more of a nest than a cave?
316
00:09:56,493 --> 00:09:58,234
Whatever. It'll do.
317
00:09:58,259 --> 00:09:59,273
Sister!
318
00:09:59,308 --> 00:10:00,841
(both squealing)
319
00:10:00,877 --> 00:10:02,234
(chuckles)
320
00:10:02,266 --> 00:10:04,166
WINSTON: Oh, that's some
sisterly love right there.
321
00:10:04,201 --> 00:10:05,872
- Let me get you two a drink.
- Okay.
322
00:10:05,897 --> 00:10:06,932
(squeals)
323
00:10:06,957 --> 00:10:07,989
Oh, my God,
324
00:10:08,014 --> 00:10:11,270
Winston is so good for you.
325
00:10:12,418 --> 00:10:13,934
What the hell is that supposed to mean?
326
00:10:13,959 --> 00:10:15,611
And I saw with my own eyes one day
327
00:10:15,646 --> 00:10:17,513
when Winston saved those kids
328
00:10:17,548 --> 00:10:19,982
from a burning building,
including a little boy.
329
00:10:20,017 --> 00:10:22,618
A little boy who's dad
left when he was young.
330
00:10:22,716 --> 00:10:25,321
Named Wheelchair Timmy.
331
00:10:25,356 --> 00:10:27,957
Wheelchair Timmy was
a heavyset boy, ginger.
332
00:10:28,419 --> 00:10:29,591
Black eyes.
333
00:10:29,616 --> 00:10:31,823
So what, you think I'm
just some cold robot
334
00:10:31,850 --> 00:10:34,363
who needs some guy to
loosen me up, make me happy?
335
00:10:34,398 --> 00:10:36,165
I just said Winston's good for you.
336
00:10:36,200 --> 00:10:38,300
Oh, my God, you always get like this!
337
00:10:38,336 --> 00:10:41,261
He grabs the kid and the chair,
lifts him up above his head,
338
00:10:41,286 --> 00:10:44,640
so that the fire doesn't
burn this little heavyset boy.
339
00:10:44,675 --> 00:10:46,442
That's the power of adrenaline.
340
00:10:46,477 --> 00:10:49,111
- And what happened to Timmy?
- Timmy? He's dead.
341
00:10:49,136 --> 00:10:51,126
- What?
- He's alive. I'm Timmy.
342
00:10:51,151 --> 00:10:52,481
Look at me now.
343
00:10:52,516 --> 00:10:54,683
Because of Winston, I'm
telling you this story.
344
00:10:54,719 --> 00:10:56,159
No, you said your name was Nick.
345
00:10:56,184 --> 00:10:57,933
I am Nick. I got to go!
346
00:10:57,958 --> 00:11:00,055
How should I be, huh? Like you?
347
00:11:00,091 --> 00:11:01,941
(mocking): "Oh, my God,
look at me, I'm Leslie.
348
00:11:01,966 --> 00:11:03,970
"I wear holiday socks in the summer.
349
00:11:03,995 --> 00:11:06,695
"I follow Ariana Grande around
like she was the Grateful Dead."
350
00:11:06,731 --> 00:11:07,830
(mocking): "Oh, I'm Aly.
351
00:11:07,865 --> 00:11:09,738
"I went to Quantico and I got a disease,
352
00:11:09,763 --> 00:11:11,633
"and I can't be around people!"
353
00:11:11,669 --> 00:11:13,669
- Do you mean "quarantine"?
- Whatever!
354
00:11:13,704 --> 00:11:14,903
You're so mean!
355
00:11:14,930 --> 00:11:18,064
- You're being a mean robot!
- No, this is being a mean robot.
356
00:11:18,109 --> 00:11:20,075
(robotic voice): "Beep, boop,
boop, boop. Leslie, you suck.
357
00:11:20,111 --> 00:11:21,343
"You can't pull off bangs.
358
00:11:21,379 --> 00:11:22,478
"You were an accident."
359
00:11:22,513 --> 00:11:24,478
LESLIE: Oh, my God! I
have a small forehead,
360
00:11:24,510 --> 00:11:26,389
and you know that, and
you use that against me!
361
00:11:26,414 --> 00:11:27,680
Just shut up!
362
00:11:27,718 --> 00:11:29,926
- I hate you!
- I hate you! I...
363
00:11:29,951 --> 00:11:31,417
(Leslie sobs)
364
00:11:33,106 --> 00:11:34,911
(whispers): God.
365
00:11:34,936 --> 00:11:37,262
(sighs) Oh, no.
366
00:11:37,287 --> 00:11:40,122
The wheelchair boy, Timmy,
367
00:11:40,147 --> 00:11:42,411
speaks very highly of you.
368
00:11:42,436 --> 00:11:43,499
(chuckles)
369
00:11:43,534 --> 00:11:45,367
- You're Aunt Karen?
- Mm-hmm.
370
00:11:45,403 --> 00:11:46,902
You didn't make a lot of sense.
371
00:11:46,937 --> 00:11:48,203
(grunts)
372
00:11:48,777 --> 00:11:51,373
Yeah, it's really coming down out there.
373
00:11:52,387 --> 00:11:54,309
- It's really freezing.
- Yeah.
374
00:11:54,345 --> 00:11:55,577
(thunder rumbling softly)
375
00:11:55,620 --> 00:11:57,176
Hey, Robby?
376
00:11:58,548 --> 00:12:00,582
Do you ever think it's, like...
377
00:12:01,619 --> 00:12:04,006
it's not good that we're so similar?
378
00:12:04,031 --> 00:12:05,162
Oh, I don't know.
379
00:12:05,187 --> 00:12:08,781
You know, my Great Uncle
Shep Wallingford used to say,
380
00:12:08,806 --> 00:12:11,284
"You buy the horse that
you see in the mirror."
381
00:12:11,317 --> 00:12:12,769
- Did you say "Wallingford"?
- Mm-hmm.
382
00:12:12,797 --> 00:12:15,431
I have Wallingfords in my
family, out near Boston.
383
00:12:15,466 --> 00:12:17,433
Ah, mine are in, uh, Newburyport.
384
00:12:17,459 --> 00:12:19,025
They were kind of,
like, local celebrities.
385
00:12:19,070 --> 00:12:20,084
They were well-known for making...
386
00:12:20,109 --> 00:12:21,976
- ... women's watches.
- ... Women's watches.
387
00:12:22,789 --> 00:12:24,122
How'd you know that?
388
00:12:24,147 --> 00:12:25,541
Wallingford watches
389
00:12:25,576 --> 00:12:27,409
BOTH:
'Cause the time is now
390
00:12:27,452 --> 00:12:29,157
And the look is wow!
391
00:12:29,182 --> 00:12:30,233
(chuckles)
392
00:12:38,818 --> 00:12:40,178
Robby...
393
00:12:41,351 --> 00:12:43,251
I think we're related.
394
00:12:45,220 --> 00:12:46,628
(thunder rumbles)
395
00:12:46,664 --> 00:12:50,164
(Jess and Robby screaming)
396
00:12:50,742 --> 00:12:52,442
(Jess and Robby screaming)
397
00:12:53,783 --> 00:12:54,916
Do you have an Uncle Tony?
398
00:12:54,951 --> 00:12:56,151
Tony, with the long fingernails,
399
00:12:56,186 --> 00:12:58,052
and he always wears a
whistle around his neck.
400
00:12:58,088 --> 00:12:59,594
Robby, we are third cousins.
401
00:12:59,619 --> 00:13:01,015
- Oh, my God!
- Ah!
402
00:13:01,040 --> 00:13:03,625
- Why, God?!
- We're going to hell!
403
00:13:03,660 --> 00:13:04,898
(groans)
404
00:13:04,923 --> 00:13:05,922
- We did stuff.
- No, stop!
405
00:13:05,947 --> 00:13:07,228
- Just saying.
- I can't live in this reality!
406
00:13:07,264 --> 00:13:09,164
- At least not second cousins.
- Ah, I can't.
407
00:13:09,199 --> 00:13:11,156
- First cousins would be way worse.
- Please, no.
408
00:13:11,586 --> 00:13:14,068
People do it all the time,
in the, in the mountains.
409
00:13:14,104 --> 00:13:15,570
In the mountains.
410
00:13:15,898 --> 00:13:16,900
(retches)
411
00:13:20,543 --> 00:13:22,136
- Don't be startled.
- God!
412
00:13:22,161 --> 00:13:23,873
What are you doing in here, Cece?
413
00:13:23,898 --> 00:13:25,143
I am hiding, okay?
414
00:13:25,168 --> 00:13:26,514
That party is out of control.
415
00:13:26,561 --> 00:13:27,993
Some guy almost burned his eyebrows off
416
00:13:28,018 --> 00:13:29,684
trying to light a
cigarette on our stove.
417
00:13:29,719 --> 00:13:31,451
It's complete anarchy in there.
418
00:13:31,476 --> 00:13:34,295
Can we just hide in here
and hang out together?
419
00:13:34,320 --> 00:13:35,850
We haven't christened the garage yet.
420
00:13:35,875 --> 00:13:38,281
Ooh, you make a very good point.
421
00:13:38,306 --> 00:13:39,367
- Okay.
- WINSTON: Hey.
422
00:13:39,383 --> 00:13:41,078
- Hello, Winston.
- Hey.
423
00:13:41,103 --> 00:13:42,837
- Question: have you guys seen Aly?
- (sighs)
424
00:13:42,862 --> 00:13:44,485
What's going on, man?
425
00:13:44,520 --> 00:13:46,987
She ran off. If I'd known
it was gonna be like this,
426
00:13:47,023 --> 00:13:48,433
I would've just done
the trench coat thing.
427
00:13:48,458 --> 00:13:49,886
- The... what?
- What is the trench coat thing?
428
00:13:49,926 --> 00:13:50,958
It's where I pick her up
from the airport naked,
429
00:13:51,040 --> 00:13:52,139
wearing nothing but a trench coat.
430
00:13:52,175 --> 00:13:54,027
Have you guys seen a
kid in a wheelchair?
431
00:13:54,159 --> 00:13:55,191
- That was me.
- What?
432
00:13:55,216 --> 00:13:56,158
- Whoa!
- Wow.
433
00:13:56,183 --> 00:13:57,345
Nick, what are you doing in here?
434
00:13:57,380 --> 00:13:59,380
Look, I was having a hard
time with your stories,
435
00:13:59,415 --> 00:14:01,148
so I took a little poetic license.
436
00:14:01,184 --> 00:14:02,850
People started asking some questions.
437
00:14:02,886 --> 00:14:04,450
Things got ahead of me.
438
00:14:04,475 --> 00:14:06,060
And I had no choice
but to hide in the car.
439
00:14:06,085 --> 00:14:07,597
Nick, I thought you were
gonna stick to the tub story.
440
00:14:07,622 --> 00:14:09,443
It's not a story,
Winston. It's not a story!
441
00:14:09,468 --> 00:14:10,565
- A story about sleeping...
- It's mental.
442
00:14:10,593 --> 00:14:11,880
- It's really not...
- Hey.
443
00:14:11,913 --> 00:14:12,998
- Found her.
- Yeah.
444
00:14:13,023 --> 00:14:14,370
Hey, are you guys ever not together?
445
00:14:14,397 --> 00:14:16,097
- Rarely.
- You know what? Hold on one second.
446
00:14:16,132 --> 00:14:18,165
I want to talk to you. Guys,
can you give us a minute?
447
00:14:18,201 --> 00:14:20,635
Sure, Winston. Cece,
let's go hide in the car...
448
00:14:20,670 --> 00:14:22,103
in the garage of our home.
449
00:14:22,138 --> 00:14:23,371
Yeah, okay.
450
00:14:26,342 --> 00:14:27,837
We'll give you guys a minute.
451
00:14:28,912 --> 00:14:32,546
Aly, uh, I was just
trying to be sweet and...
452
00:14:32,571 --> 00:14:35,049
And I ruined it. I know.
453
00:14:35,076 --> 00:14:37,043
I said my family was crazy,
454
00:14:37,086 --> 00:14:39,520
and I ended up being the craziest one.
455
00:14:39,566 --> 00:14:43,051
Look, I'm so embarrassed
you saw that side of me,
456
00:14:43,076 --> 00:14:45,176
and I'm sure you want
to run for the hills.
457
00:14:45,201 --> 00:14:47,161
So, it's fine. I don't blame you.
458
00:14:47,196 --> 00:14:48,897
You're embarrassed of being
crazy in front of me?
459
00:14:48,922 --> 00:14:50,375
I acted insane.
460
00:14:50,400 --> 00:14:52,858
Even just talking
about it is humiliating.
461
00:14:52,883 --> 00:14:55,536
I'm just gonna, yeah,
I'm gonna walk away.
462
00:14:55,572 --> 00:14:56,704
Okay.
463
00:14:59,542 --> 00:15:00,937
Oh, dear Lord.
464
00:15:01,720 --> 00:15:02,803
The car's running.
465
00:15:02,828 --> 00:15:04,443
- Nick, how long have you been in here?
- Been running this whole time?
466
00:15:04,468 --> 00:15:06,390
I was cold. I was cold.
467
00:15:06,648 --> 00:15:08,382
Did you ever go to one of those big
468
00:15:08,418 --> 00:15:10,151
Wallingford family cookouts?
469
00:15:10,186 --> 00:15:11,724
Just one, in '92.
470
00:15:11,749 --> 00:15:14,355
I remember they had a really
competitive three-legged race,
471
00:15:14,390 --> 00:15:17,026
and they paired me up with a
little boy who had a helmet on.
472
00:15:17,051 --> 00:15:18,394
His skin was so translucent,
473
00:15:18,419 --> 00:15:20,061
it was like he was a jellyfish.
474
00:15:20,096 --> 00:15:21,837
- Did he play an imaginary trombone?
- Yeah.
475
00:15:21,862 --> 00:15:24,837
He kept saying, "It's better
to be safe than speedy."
476
00:15:24,862 --> 00:15:26,900
- That was me! That was me!
- Oh, my God.
477
00:15:26,925 --> 00:15:28,431
Oh, this is too much.
478
00:15:28,456 --> 00:15:31,405
I don't want to die with
my cousin-lover in a cave.
479
00:15:31,441 --> 00:15:32,865
- Oh, God.
- Everyone will think we fled here
480
00:15:32,890 --> 00:15:34,076
'cause society wouldn't accept us.
481
00:15:34,101 --> 00:15:36,271
I just wanted to see a waterfall.
482
00:15:36,296 --> 00:15:38,690
Me, too! I got to get out of here!
483
00:15:38,715 --> 00:15:39,981
You can't walk, I can't see anything.
484
00:15:40,016 --> 00:15:42,758
Stand up, blind boy.
I'm getting on your back.
485
00:15:42,828 --> 00:15:44,652
- Take these.
- Oh, okay.
486
00:15:44,687 --> 00:15:46,454
Oh, man. Okay.
487
00:15:46,489 --> 00:15:47,922
We have the same prescription.
488
00:15:47,957 --> 00:15:50,391
Yeah, no kidding, Robby.
All right, you ready?
489
00:15:50,436 --> 00:15:52,897
- Yeah. So, "Wallingfords" on three?
- No! Ew!
490
00:15:52,922 --> 00:15:53,928
I'm really sorry. I'm so nervous.
491
00:15:53,963 --> 00:15:55,529
- Okay, one, two, three!
- Two, three!
492
00:15:55,565 --> 00:15:57,331
(both yelling)
493
00:15:57,359 --> 00:15:59,992
ROBBY: I didn't wear
the right shoes for this!
494
00:16:00,025 --> 00:16:01,252
JESS: Go over there!
495
00:16:02,103 --> 00:16:04,292
I'm sorry about before.
496
00:16:04,317 --> 00:16:06,350
I guess I really freaked out on you.
497
00:16:06,822 --> 00:16:08,446
And I'm sorry that I told you
498
00:16:08,471 --> 00:16:10,790
I was gonna shave your
eyebrows off in your sleep.
499
00:16:10,814 --> 00:16:13,582
- You never said that.
- Oh, maybe I was just thinking that.
500
00:16:13,617 --> 00:16:15,951
I'm just so embarrassed
Winston saw that.
501
00:16:15,986 --> 00:16:17,519
I'm pretty sure I scared him off.
502
00:16:17,555 --> 00:16:19,054
No, you didn't. He's on the table.
503
00:16:19,089 --> 00:16:20,122
(tapping glass)
504
00:16:20,157 --> 00:16:21,225
Oh, no.
505
00:16:21,257 --> 00:16:22,598
- Oh, no, no, no.
- WINSTON: Hello.
506
00:16:22,626 --> 00:16:24,259
I am Winston Bishop.
507
00:16:24,295 --> 00:16:26,169
I'm Aly's boyfriend.
508
00:16:26,194 --> 00:16:27,229
Please, if you will,
509
00:16:27,264 --> 00:16:29,898
I want to, uh, say a few
words to my girlfriend.
510
00:16:29,934 --> 00:16:31,133
He's standing on the furniture.
511
00:16:31,168 --> 00:16:32,483
Just relax, okay? Help is on the way.
512
00:16:32,508 --> 00:16:35,270
Aly, I wanted you to
feel special tonight
513
00:16:35,306 --> 00:16:38,574
because... I'm wild about you.
514
00:16:39,085 --> 00:16:41,078
Maybe things didn't go perfectly,
515
00:16:41,103 --> 00:16:43,170
but damn it, don't be embarrassed
516
00:16:43,213 --> 00:16:45,180
to be crazy in front of me.
517
00:16:45,215 --> 00:16:46,952
Okay? I am the king of crazy.
518
00:16:46,977 --> 00:16:48,010
(chuckles)
519
00:16:48,035 --> 00:16:50,272
I have inside jokes with my cat.
520
00:16:50,787 --> 00:16:53,488
I am a member of the Puzzling
Guild of North America.
521
00:16:53,513 --> 00:16:54,796
I shave my face cold,
522
00:16:54,821 --> 00:16:56,388
- and I brush my teeth hot.
- It's true.
523
00:16:56,413 --> 00:16:59,294
On one very late and
very desperate night,
524
00:16:59,330 --> 00:17:02,598
I used Furguson's cat box as my own box.
525
00:17:02,633 --> 00:17:04,226
And, yes, it is true
526
00:17:04,251 --> 00:17:06,034
what many of you have heard.
527
00:17:06,358 --> 00:17:09,171
I once fell asleep in a bathtub!
528
00:17:09,206 --> 00:17:11,907
(laughing)
529
00:17:11,942 --> 00:17:14,643
I love that story.
530
00:17:14,678 --> 00:17:16,378
(continues laughing)
531
00:17:16,413 --> 00:17:17,755
And then what happened?
532
00:17:17,780 --> 00:17:19,047
What do you mean, "And
then what happened?"
533
00:17:19,083 --> 00:17:21,058
He fell asleep in the tub!
534
00:17:21,083 --> 00:17:23,218
He was asleep, and then he woke up.
535
00:17:23,253 --> 00:17:24,686
(stomping on table)
536
00:17:24,722 --> 00:17:26,356
I don't know, maybe I
got to hear it again.
537
00:17:26,381 --> 00:17:27,716
So who cares if you're crazy?
538
00:17:27,741 --> 00:17:29,625
I don't care. I'm crazy, too.
539
00:17:29,660 --> 00:17:30,959
(scoffs) Watch this.
540
00:17:30,995 --> 00:17:33,195
I'm gonna put a carrot behind my ear,
541
00:17:33,230 --> 00:17:35,564
like a bunny reporter,
and I'm gonna do this dance
542
00:17:35,599 --> 00:17:37,132
I've been working on for five years.
543
00:17:37,167 --> 00:17:39,201
(grunting rhythmically)
544
00:17:39,226 --> 00:17:40,320
Don't you do that carrot.
545
00:17:40,345 --> 00:17:41,370
Little bunny carrot.
546
00:17:41,405 --> 00:17:42,971
(imitates chewing)
547
00:17:43,007 --> 00:17:45,407
(Winston mumbling goofy noises)
548
00:17:49,709 --> 00:17:52,061
(laughs)
549
00:17:52,616 --> 00:17:54,842
I see we got two new...
550
00:17:54,982 --> 00:17:56,551
people here.
551
00:17:56,587 --> 00:17:58,020
Who are they?
552
00:17:58,055 --> 00:18:01,523
Yeah, um, Mom, Dad,
553
00:18:01,558 --> 00:18:02,924
this is Winston.
554
00:18:02,960 --> 00:18:04,192
Hey.
555
00:18:04,228 --> 00:18:05,494
(chuckles)
556
00:18:05,529 --> 00:18:08,430
Uh... I am Winston.
557
00:18:08,465 --> 00:18:10,899
And I assure you that
all of those incidents
558
00:18:10,934 --> 00:18:13,741
were from a very long time ago, kinda.
559
00:18:13,766 --> 00:18:16,038
It's clear you love our daughter.
560
00:18:16,073 --> 00:18:20,375
In a very passionate, unique way.
561
00:18:20,411 --> 00:18:22,298
That's all that matters.
562
00:18:22,323 --> 00:18:23,412
(chuckles)
563
00:18:23,447 --> 00:18:24,493
(mouthing)
564
00:18:24,821 --> 00:18:26,517
You're a two-hander, huh?
565
00:18:26,542 --> 00:18:27,478
(laughs)
566
00:18:27,503 --> 00:18:28,539
Well, all right.
567
00:18:28,564 --> 00:18:30,018
- Okay.
- Yes.
568
00:18:30,064 --> 00:18:31,423
- Okay.
- Okay.
569
00:18:31,448 --> 00:18:33,759
Seriously, we've been on the
road for a couple of hours.
570
00:18:33,784 --> 00:18:35,968
- We need to use the bathroom.
- Yeah, yeah, yeah, of course!
571
00:18:35,993 --> 00:18:38,713
It's, uh, right down,
right down the hall.
572
00:18:38,955 --> 00:18:40,328
(chuckles)
573
00:18:41,471 --> 00:18:45,299
Thank you for not being
afraid of me or my family.
574
00:18:47,963 --> 00:18:50,064
- (knocking)
- Open up. Police!
575
00:18:50,674 --> 00:18:52,774
- Who-who called the police?
- I don't know.
576
00:18:52,810 --> 00:18:55,477
I guess we better do
whatever they say. Ugh.
577
00:18:55,512 --> 00:18:57,879
Why are you guys acting
like you're in a porno?
578
00:18:57,915 --> 00:18:59,381
(sighs)
579
00:18:59,923 --> 00:19:01,470
We got a noise complaint.
580
00:19:01,751 --> 00:19:03,487
The law has spoken, everyone.
581
00:19:03,512 --> 00:19:04,812
I guess the party's over.
582
00:19:04,837 --> 00:19:06,173
You could just file out through here.
583
00:19:06,198 --> 00:19:07,226
Winston?
584
00:19:07,251 --> 00:19:08,390
(chuckles): Look who it is.
585
00:19:08,425 --> 00:19:09,791
Hey, Aly, you're back.
586
00:19:09,827 --> 00:19:11,760
Jenkins, get in here,
man! We having a party.
587
00:19:11,795 --> 00:19:13,161
- What you drinking?
- Hi, Jenkins.
588
00:19:13,197 --> 00:19:14,452
Wait, what?
589
00:19:14,477 --> 00:19:15,610
(laughs)
590
00:19:16,553 --> 00:19:17,511
Well, you know what,
591
00:19:17,536 --> 00:19:19,755
I guess I'm just gonna have to
take the law into my own hands.
592
00:19:19,780 --> 00:19:21,178
All right, everybody!
593
00:19:22,039 --> 00:19:23,741
Shoes off, coasters down!
594
00:19:23,766 --> 00:19:25,231
This is our house,
595
00:19:25,256 --> 00:19:28,253
and our house has rules! Okay?
596
00:19:28,278 --> 00:19:30,078
Not a suggestion. Shoes off, let's go!
597
00:19:30,114 --> 00:19:31,966
- Okay, okay. Shoes off.
- Shoes.
598
00:19:31,991 --> 00:19:33,809
- SCHMIDT: Take your shoes off...
- Get 'em off!
599
00:19:33,834 --> 00:19:35,283
- ... and put 'em to the side!
- Yep!
600
00:19:35,308 --> 00:19:37,007
- And then let's have a good time.
- Yeah, let's have some fun.
601
00:19:37,054 --> 00:19:38,253
- It's a party, people.
- It's a party.
602
00:19:38,288 --> 00:19:40,088
ROBBY: So just to be clear,
603
00:19:40,113 --> 00:19:43,597
um, we're definitely broken up, right?
604
00:19:43,777 --> 00:19:44,861
Yeah.
605
00:19:44,886 --> 00:19:46,394
- Yeah, I mean, that's...
- Yeah. I mean...
606
00:19:46,430 --> 00:19:48,402
I don't know why I asked.
607
00:19:51,354 --> 00:19:52,823
Well...
608
00:19:58,089 --> 00:19:59,901
Oh, wait. You should take these.
609
00:19:59,926 --> 00:20:02,284
Oh, you know, keep 'em.
They look great on you.
610
00:20:02,309 --> 00:20:03,776
Thank you.
611
00:20:09,019 --> 00:20:10,519
I'll see you around.
612
00:20:11,009 --> 00:20:12,575
Yeah.
613
00:20:12,600 --> 00:20:14,017
Maybe at the next family reun...
614
00:20:14,042 --> 00:20:16,409
- Too soon. Yep.
- A little too soon. Yes.
615
00:20:17,726 --> 00:20:19,515
- Oh, dear Lord.
- It's not as bad as it looks.
616
00:20:19,540 --> 00:20:22,197
I'm really, I'm really clean
underneath all this mud.
617
00:20:22,232 --> 00:20:23,733
Oh, my God, what happened?
618
00:20:23,758 --> 00:20:25,400
(sighs) Hike took a turn,
619
00:20:25,435 --> 00:20:27,636
and then Robby and I broke up in a cave.
620
00:20:27,671 --> 00:20:31,094
I'm so sorry, sweetheart. I am so sorry.
621
00:20:31,126 --> 00:20:32,477
- Air hug.
- Yeah.
622
00:20:32,502 --> 00:20:33,549
I'm gonna go get you a glass of wine.
623
00:20:33,577 --> 00:20:35,043
Real sorry about you and
Robby. Don't touch anything.
624
00:20:35,078 --> 00:20:37,258
I'm gonna go get some paper
towels. Don't-don't move.
625
00:20:37,283 --> 00:20:39,540
Whoa, Jess! Are you okay?
626
00:20:39,565 --> 00:20:41,016
Oh, long story.
627
00:20:41,051 --> 00:20:42,918
But I'm okay. Is there any food left?
628
00:20:42,953 --> 00:20:46,488
I'm so hungry, and all I have
is this bag of gross raisins.
629
00:20:46,523 --> 00:20:48,924
Gross raisins? Are you kidding me?
630
00:20:48,959 --> 00:20:50,826
Raisins are the best. I love raisins.
631
00:20:50,861 --> 00:20:52,360
(laughs): Of course you do.
632
00:20:52,396 --> 00:20:54,396
Yeah, sometimes I just
tuck 'em in my cheek,
633
00:20:54,431 --> 00:20:55,753
and I go about my day,
634
00:20:55,778 --> 00:20:58,792
so if I ever need the flavor of
raisins, well, I already got it.
635
00:20:59,703 --> 00:21:01,689
I'm having trouble
envisioning what it's like
636
00:21:01,714 --> 00:21:03,939
to need the flavor of raisins.
637
00:21:03,974 --> 00:21:05,273
But go nuts.
638
00:21:05,309 --> 00:21:06,800
Go raisins. (laughs)
639
00:21:06,825 --> 00:21:08,495
You said, "Go nuts,"
I said, "Go raisins."
640
00:21:08,520 --> 00:21:09,651
CECE: Wine.
641
00:21:09,676 --> 00:21:11,501
- Paper towels.
- JESS: Oh, thank you, Schmidt.
642
00:21:11,526 --> 00:21:12,614
Thanks. Oh, thanks.
643
00:21:12,649 --> 00:21:14,611
Thanks. Thank you.
644
00:21:14,636 --> 00:21:16,251
- SCHMIDT: Just step on these.
- NICK: Go faster.
645
00:21:16,276 --> 00:21:17,860
JESS: Uh, I have enough paper towels.
646
00:21:18,113 --> 00:21:19,768
- WINSTON: Hey!
- JESS: Hey!
647
00:21:19,793 --> 00:21:21,675
- Hey, what's up?
- Not much.
648
00:21:21,700 --> 00:21:23,409
- Welcome to the party.
- Thanks.
649
00:21:23,434 --> 00:21:24,464
Where's Robby?
650
00:21:24,489 --> 00:21:26,417
JESS: Oh, yeah, um, he couldn't make it.
651
00:21:26,442 --> 00:21:27,768
Turns out we're cousins, so...
652
00:21:27,793 --> 00:21:28,828
- NICK: What?!
- CECE: What?
653
00:21:28,853 --> 00:21:30,344
- NICK: He's your cousin?
- JESS: House looks great.
654
00:21:30,369 --> 00:21:31,383
- NICK: Wait a second.
- Thank you.
655
00:21:31,408 --> 00:21:32,266
- What?
- How did that happen?
656
00:21:32,291 --> 00:21:33,523
NICK: Cousin?
657
00:21:33,573 --> 00:21:38,123
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