All language subtitles for Monarch Of The Glen s02e02.e

( horn honking )

Well, now then,

the great day dawns.

Absolutely.
You know, Kilwillie,

I have this
strange feeling.

- Not ill, are you?
- Sweating palms, palpitations,

inability to
concentrate,

uncontrollable
shaking.

Nothing out of the ordinary there then.

Absolutely not!
Come on!

Ahh...

my beauty.

My Lagganmore Peculiar,
come home at last.

I've tried to take
care of her for you.

I'm very grateful. You'll
get a reward, don't worry.

- Come on. It's almost time.
- Is it safe?

Molly's out in the real world, no
sign of Archie at all. ( laughs )

( bird calling )

- What was that?
- What? What?

Come on!

( liquid sloshing )

Gently!
Gently.

Just think,

when you set this wondrous
malt aside to mature,

all those years ago.

30 years ago
to the day.

30 years.

When I was
as debonair as Cary Grant,

and my forehead
was a mass of golden curls.

That was a very
long time ago.

Don't forget.

Not a word about this
to anyone,

especially
you-know-who.

Just hold it right there.

Don't even think
about it!

( theme music playing )

Archie: so...

is there anything special

about this Lagganmore Peculiar?

You mean apart from being
extremely valuab-

nothing special at all!

If that's the case,
why are you being so shifty?

- Ah, fair point.
- Will you be quiet?

Anyone would think you'd
drunk a pint of it already!

Right.

I think I'm going to confiscate
this, pending further inquiries.

You can't, it's mine!
I'm head of the family!

And I am the laird. It's my
responsibility to make the most

of the estate's assets,
whatever they are.

Is nothing sacred?
You've flogged everything,

including most of my wine!
Finders keepers!

Losers weepers!

Possession is nine-tenths
of the law.

Whiskey's meant
for drinking, damn it!

I'm not gonna take this
lying down, Kilwillie,

oh, dear me, no.

Chocks away, chaps.

Have you seen this?

Lexie:
Don't tell me.

Queen Victoria has
just bought a bungalow

in a place
called Balmoral?

If we don't stop
Archie doing this,

you and me
are finished, son.

But, Golly,
we've known for ages

that Archie was gonna hire another
sad schmuck to work in here.

That was to run
the visitor center.

This is
something else.

"Head Ranger"?

Head Ranger.

Seems to me
that title

carries certain
implications.

Yeah, like he's
gonna head...

well...
the ranges.

Those ranges
are mine...

and have been for the last 20 years.

This is the end
of the old order.

Maybe me with it.

Oh, Golly,
don't be daft.

You'd better
believe it, lass.

He's got
to be stopped.

Well, as long as you
don't expect any help

from Albert Einstein there.

( mimicking machine gun )

Golly: Duncan!

Do you not realise
how serious this is?

Our whole future's
under threat here.

You're supposed to be a man,
not a stupid boy!

Now grow up!

Act your age!

Leave your names
on your paintings,

otherwise I've no idea
whose they are.

Miss, miss...

- what are you doing here?
- Sorry. Is it a bad time?

Uh... no.

How've you been?

Yeah, you know,
all right.

Have you spoken
to Justine yet?

No.

Anyway, have you seen
the advert

for the new job?

Uh-huh.

Would you give me a hand
with the interviews?

Yeah, sure.

Great.

I need someone to help me
outvote my father,

'cause he's bound
to want the wrong person.

I better go.

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Why don't you
come around later?

We can talk
about it.

And I'll even make you some supper.

Oh, that'd be great.
Yeah.

See you later.

Okay, I'll see you later.

( children wooing )

Aaaah!

Whoo-hoo!

Whoo-
whoa, whoa, whoa!

He's right, you know.

I'm no good
to man nor beast.

Don't be daft, lad!
You're great.

At what?

Give me a few hours
and I'll think of something.

I'm only joking.

You're good with beasts,
with machines,

and you're good
with people too.

You're just good
to have around, wee man.

Do you really
think so?

Yeah.
I mean...

you could
really go places,

as long as you
believed in yourself.

How can I?
Golly doesn't.

Well, show him.
And Archie.

Yeah, but how?

( knock on door )

Hang on!

All right!

Sorry, have you
got a minute?

Yes, sure.
Come in.

It's...

it's about this
head ranger.

Listen, Golly,
I want you to know

whoever we appoint won't
have anything to do with you.

Okay?

Right.

I mean, you'll still
be your own boss,

in charge
of the sporting side,

and then the ranger
will look after hikers,

climbers, trails,
things like that.

Mm-hmm.

You'll both be reporting
to me separately.

Yes, yes.

Well, unless...

unless what?

Unless I get
the job myself.

You'll have my application
by the end of the day.

Golly?

Golly.

Archie.

Mother, I need
your help.

Ah, Golly,

a moment
of your valuable time.

You've just been
with Archie?

Uh-huh.

Did you notice, um...

was there any sign
of, uh...

that'll cost you.

What?

Oh.
Very well.

Hector,
behave yourself.

- I'm talking favors, right?
- A gentleman's agreement?

- Uh-huh.
- Splendid!

Whatever you say.

Well?

It's in his room.
Under the wee table.

It's locked.

( vacuum rattling )

Lex, would you post this for me, please?

Sure.

How is she?

I don't know.

It's just a few things
she left behind.

Oh, and I won't be in
for supper tonight either.

And whose table will you
be plunking your feet under?

I've got a few things
to talk over with...

- with Katrina.
- oh, this week's model.

You don't waste much time.

Just what point is it
you're trying to make?

Oh, give me a break! You're hardly
beyond one brokenhearted lassie,

and you've got your
philandering claws into the next.

- It is a perfectly innocent business meeting.
- Come on!

If you're prepared to stomach that
one's cooking, then it must be serious.

Lexie.

I hope it chokes you.

( whistling )

Oh, aye.

Who's away
with my ax?

Hi.

You look nice.

So do you.

- Come in.
- Yes. Thank you.

( growling )

Ah, Hector,
have you seen Golly?

Oh, right.

( Katrina laughing )

There's still some tunabake,
if you're still hungry.

No, no.

I'm fine, thanks.
It was...

it was very filling.

Is that your way
of saying

"no, thanks,
it was really crap"?

Let's get
one thing straight-

I'm completely useless
in the kitchen.

Pretty sensational
elsewhere in the house?

Archie MacDonald!
That is not

the remark
of a gentleman!

Sorry.
Terrible thing to say.

Must be the-
the drink talking.

You know, when you smile
like that, sunny jim...

gives you a retching feeling
in the pit of your stomach.

- We'd better stop.
- Why?

'Cause you're pouring
chianti onto my lap.

Oh, sorry!

All right.

Sorry.

I'll just go
and clean up,

okay?

Sorry.

Molly: Come on, boys, come on.

Lovely evening,
isn't it?

Aye it is,
Molly, it is.

Would you like
a beer?

Oh, no thanks.

It always
makes me fart.

Can't have flatulence amongst
the ruling classes, can we?

That would never do.

- Must be my age.
- ( dog whines )

It is sad,
isn't it, Golly,

when one can't do the
things one used to?

I suppose it is.
Like?

Well, I knew that Hector and
I would be lost without Archie.

Such good judgment
for one so young.

Och, well, he's had
good training.

Much of it from you, Golly,
we all know that.

And I know how he values
your work as head ghillie.

Let's hope he finds someone half
as good for this ranger thing.

Molly, now you've come
to mention it-

and then what a great team
he'll have, eh?

Maturity and experience
on one hand,

youthful drive
and energy on the other.

Aye.

And we can't be good
at everything, can we?

No.

Oh, listen to me
rabbitting on.

Well, I've enjoyed
our little chat.

No problem.

Molly...

if Archie thinks
I'm too old for this job,

maybe he just
better tell me himself.

Okay?

Yeah.

There's still some of that
wine left, if you want some.

No, I think maybe
I've had enough.

I've got to drive home in a minute.

Right.

Look, I'm sorry.

Oh, it's no bother.
Don't worry.

No.

I meant...

oh, right.

Well, yeah, me too.
It's just that-

I know.

Too soon.

It wouldn't be fair
on her, would it?

Or you.

Don't worry
about me, Archie.

I can look
after myself.

Right.

I'd better head off then.

- Thanks for supper. It was great.
- No, it wasn't.

But thanks for saying so.

I'll see you
at the interviews?

Uh-huh.

Bye.

( door opens )

( groans )

- Oh!
- Ah ha! Caught you!

You're not getting any of this
whiskey, do you understand?

Tomorrow I'm going
to call Sotheby's.

- You can't!
- and they're gonna sell it

for loads of cash which I'm
gonna plow into the estate,

and you are not gonna
drink a single drop, okay?

Look, son...

I'm an old man.

Very few pleasures left.

Have a heart.

I don't have one.
So go away,

and leave me and my barrel
alone to sleep in peace.

Rotter!

Whoa... argh!

It's just a thought, you know
with all this stuff going on-

oh, no.
You did right.

Thought we'd better
check it out.

You've not put a foot
wrong these past months.

Yeah?

In fact, I think you're
ready for a fresh challenge.

That's just what
Lexie was saying.

Listen, I'm sorry if I
spoke harsh words to you.

That was completely
out of order.

Oh, no.
No bother, Golly.

I'm just glad you think
I'm up to this new job.

Huh?

What- hey,
come here, come here.

What do you mean,
new job?

Huh?

Well, you're-
you're not suggesting-

you're not suggesting
you've applied

for the ranger's job?
You can't do that!

- Can't I?
- That's my job.

I'm talking about you
taking over as the ghillie!

Oh.

C'mon.

Morning.

Or is it afternoon?

Have you got eyes
on the top of your head?

Who needs them? Heard you
coming about 10 minutes ago.

If your eyes are
as good as your ears,

you'll know
you're trespassing.

And you must know there's
no such enforceable offense

in Scottish law.

I'm sorry.
Shall we start again?

I'm Fergal MacLure.

You must be-

camping without permission,
disturbing the wildlife,

as well as
posing a fire risk.

Duncan: Golly!

Look!
He's got a chopper!

Same make and everything.

Don't tell me. Is threatening
behavior towards twigs

another offense
in your statute book,

Golly?

( whistling )

Hector, there's no need
to hang around.

I can do these
by myself.

You got them round the
wrong way last time.

The imperial set
hang there,

the royal set
hang there.

And be careful, they're
my pride and joy.

I'm watching you.

Oh, I've stopped
all that silly nonsense.

Oh, Archie, I must
talk to you about Golly.

Golly: Archie.

There's someone here
for you to see.

- Who's that?
- This guy that's been nicking all the stuff.

Him.

Fergal!
How're you doing?

How's it going, Archie?
Listen, sorry about this.

Wait a minute.
You two know one another?

Yeah. Fergal's applied
for the job.

He asked if he could spend
a couple of days on the estate,

look around, get to know
the place better.

I see.

Yeah, Fergal,
I'll catch up with you later.

Yeah, sure.
No problem.

I know, I'm sorry, I
should have said something.

It's just that- you know-
with all that's going on-

better late than never.

Right.

Well, if you'll
excuse me, I've...

an important phone call
to make.

Archie!

Oh!

It's about tomorrow's
interview.

Yeah?

Well, I just wanted
to make it clear

that... I'm definitely going
ahead with my application.

You are?

Archie, it's too good
an opportunity to miss.

Uh, Golly...

Golly, have you-
have you thought about this?

I've thought about it
very carefully, Archie.

And you're happy
to go up

against the likes
of Fergal and Duncan?

I know that there are
some who think I'm just...

a wee bit too long
in the tooth for it.

No.

I'm sure
a sensible chap like you

appreciates
the value of experience.

Absolutely, yeah.

As well as the provisions

of the equal opportunities act
of 1992.

I'll see you
in the morning.

( Archie mumbling )

Lexie: Hector!

Where are you?

I think you need
your head examined.

If you know
what I mean.

Hector?

Hector.

Hector?

Kilwillie's on the phone.

Wants to know if the fox
has left his den yet,

whatever that means.

Hector?

Hector?

That's right,
Lagganmore Peculiar.

In a sealed cask.

Well, I was wondering

if you might be able
to auction it for me.

Good.

How much?

Really?

That's amazing!

Hang on, I'll just
check the thing.

Father!

Father!

Where are you?
I know you're here somewhere!

Father.

( whistling )

Archie:
Where is it?

- What?
- The barrel.

- What barrel?
- You know what barrel.

I don't know what
you're talking about.

- You took it.
- I didn't.

There's no point
denying it.

I did not!
All right,

if I've got it,

where is it now then?

Ah ha!

Another conspirator, eh?

So, you agreed to be
the getaway in the heist,

in return for my father's
vote at tomorrow's interviews.

Eh?

I'm surprised
at you, Duncan.

Surprised
and disappointed.

No, no, listen, boss,
I can explain!

It was on the lift
when it came down.

I was just
trying to help!

What is it, Badger?

Oh.

Hector: Kilwillie?

Hello?

- Kilwillie!
- Yes!

Ah. The fox has
gone to earth,

having dug himself
a rather deeper den.

Plan B, I think.

I understand.

Into the starting gate
first thing tomorrow.

Roger wilco.
Over and out.

Over and out.

Thank you, Badger.

Hi.

Sorry, I hope
I didn't startle you.

Having a nice paddle?

Well, you're not
gonna believe this, but...

I'm actually looking
for freshwater crayfish.

That's a new one.

You should try
further down.

I had my school kids
looking for them last week.

There's a dipper there, too.

A bird?

Lovely wee thing.

Yeah, but better insulated
than homo sapiens.

I'm freezing.
Do you mind?

I'm sorry?

Well...

it's just that...

I'm not...

oh! Sorry.

Why should I?

I mean...

it is a free country.

Ah, please.

What would you do
if I didn't?

( splashing )

Okay!
I get your point!

Kilwillie: But how am I
supposed to get up there?

Hector: Use your
imagination. Get a ladder!

- I'll get vertigo.
- don't be ridiculous!

Pull yourself together!
Whoa!

Hector...
Kilwillie,

excuse us a second.

It's time, Hector.

Time?
Time for what?

What do you know?

Time for you to repay
that wee favor you owe me.

What?

Ah. Yes.

I think you know
what to do,

which way
your conscience lies.

Quite.

Kilwillie.

What was
all that about?

Mind your own business!
Now, where were we?

Mission impossible.

Ahhh!

Lexie!

Shush.
And this.

You are wearing
a suit today,

and that is that!

Do you mind?

Now,
when you go in,

shake them
by the hand.

Wish them
a good day.

Establish
some authority.

And when you talk,

don't look
at your shoes,

but at them.

Maintain eye contact
at all times.

There.

What do we think
about that then?

Oh, Duncan, you look like
a porn star from the 1970's.

I think we might need your help, Molly.

When you've got it,

don't let it
out of your sight.

Have you got
everything?

Map of the house.

Walkie-talkie.

Rope.

Swiss Army penknife.

Jacknight.

Jacknight?

Sorry.
I made that bit up.

Hiya.

Good morning, Archie.

( dogs barking )

Hector:
Down, boys, come on.

Archie: McKnight, come this way, please.

Straight through.

Father.

What are you two doing?

Well?

Definitely not. Eyes too
close together, I think.

Testing,
testing!

All toys confiscated

for the duration
of the interview.

You can't,
it's mine!

Give that to me!

Mother.

You had no right
to take that- uh...

Molly, if Kilwillie

should happen
to make contact-

father, please.

All right.

Thank you.

( radio static )

( rattling )

Archie: Sorry to have kept you waiting.

We're running
a little behind.

If you'd like
to come through.

Hmm...

another woman
in the house.

I'm not that stupid,
Molly.

Molly:
Oh, Hector,

Peter O'Sullivan
asked me to tell you

that red rum
has crossed

the milling road.

Molly,

I've just jumped beaches.

First time round.

Over and out.

Very good.
Over.

Duncan.

We're ready.

- Aww.
- Aww.

Duncan,
you're a vision

in tweed.

Good luck, son.

Remember,
walk tall,

and may
the best man win.

Thanks very much,
Golly.

I appreciate that.

Knock 'em dead,
sweetheart.

And remember,
whatever happens,

I'm proud of you.

Molly, any news?

( grunting )

( sighs )

Duncan, that tie...

I didn't know you were a member
of the old naval military.

Archie: It's one of yours, father.

Oh.

Archie:
Right, Duncan.

Perhaps you can tell us why you think

you're the right candidate for this job.

I've learned a lot...

and now I'm ready to take on
more responsibilities.

Oh, for god's sake,
life's too short.

How do we preserve
the balance

between providing
access to all...

preserving the environment...

and making the estate
pay its way?

That's the question.

Or questions.

( sigh of relief )

Where is the stupid thing!

This is a beautiful place,
but it's time...

that the ordinary folk
got to enjoy it.

Excellent, Duncan,

excellent.

Right.
Thanks very much.

Ta.

Well.

- Well?
- How did it go?

It was just...
great!

Both:
Aww...

the history of my family

is intertwined
with your family.

There have been
MacKenzies here

as long as there
have been MacDonalds,

and the service
which I am proud to provide

was given by my father
before him,

and his father before him

and so on
for five generations.

Of course, I understand

that the times,
they are a-changing.

You might look at me
and think,

good old Golly...

nice chap,
good at his job, but...

you can't teach
an old dog new tricks.

Well, you'd be wrong.

I might not have
some fancy degrees

from some fancy university,
but...

I do have something
other folk don't.

Passion.

( barrel banging )

( sizzling )

( barking )

Fergal, this is
Katrina Finlay.

- Hello. Again.
- Hi.

You've already met?

Well...
you could say that.

Fergal: Just a few days here tells you

the glen has a quite
staggering biodiversity.

I think what we
have to achieve is a means

of protecting
and promoting it,

while also increasing
visitors and income.

But how would you do that?

It's quite straightforward,
really.

You just encourage
the people to go

where the diversity isn't,

by means of tracks and signs
throughout the estate.

Actually, I've just finished a
project to achieve the same objectives.

Where was that?

Botswana.

I've always wanted
to go there.

Okavango Delta.

Oh, I loved it, you know.

I mean, not just the place,
but the people too.

- It's brilliant.
- I can imagine.

Mm.
Yeah.

Sorry.

( panting )

Archie: Fergal, you've
fantastic qualifications.

You've traveled and worked
all over the world.

Why would you want
to come to Glenbogle?

I don't know.

Maybe it's time
to settle down,

put down some roots.

Great.

If you wouldn't mind
waiting outside?

- Sure.
- I smell a rat.

I don't believe all this
flannel. You're hiding something.

- Father, please!
- no, it's all right, Archie.

Um...

when I was in Africa,
my brother got ill,

and I had to come back
to help him.

They took one
of my kidneys out,

and stuck it in him.

Wow...

anyway, it's all
worked out okay,

but the doctors have asked me
to hang around for a while,

so...
( clears throat )

I need a job.

Molly: I'm so sorry to disturb you,

but the person concerned
was insistent.

Hector, I've been asked
to tell you

that the horse
has unseated its jockey

at the canal turn.

I'm so sorry.

Where is it?

I don't know. I don't think
that whiskey wants to be drunk!

I told you-

if you ask me, the bally thing
has got a mind of its own!

Oh, don't be so ridiculous!

Yes!

Oh, thanks, Lex.

So...

ready for the big
decision, eh?

Let me guess.

Hector'll go for Golly...

she'll go for Fergal...

so you'll hold
the casting vote.

You need the tope, Arch.

Molly on radio:
Kilwillie...

# Kilwillie... #

yes, Molly?
Over.

Are you looking
for these?

Oh.
Molly,

give them back, please!

Come on now.
Be a good girl.

Molly, as you know,
I am not a man of violence,

but I must have
those keys!

Molly!

First rule of management:
Promote from within.

Disastrous for morale
to do otherwise.

Yes, but who?
Golly or Duncan?

Golly, of course!

I must confess
Duncan surprised me.

I often cursed the boy, but
he seems to have hidden depths.

But let's face it,
he's far too young.

Katrina: Yeah, Duncan impressed me too,

but he doesn't hold a candle to Fergal

in terms of experience and expertise.

And what about Golly?

Golly is
a fantastic asset,

but is he right
for this job?

Surely it's better to have
them all working for you.

After all, Fergal has
perfect qualifications.

I think we should grab
him with both hands.

Most apt.

What?

Well, you're sure
you're not backing him

because of his...
other qualifications?

Hector: Right. I go for
Golly, she goes for Fergal.

It's up to you, Archie.

What are you
gonna do?

( clock ticking )

Fergal, would you
join us again, please?

Golly, Duncan,
I'd like to talk to you

in a couple of minutes,
if that's okay.

Laddie...
wait.

Duncan...
look, I'm sorry.

Stupid!

That's our Duncan.

As if you'd ever give
that kind of job to me.

- Listen-
- stupid!

But it doesn't mean
I don't have dreams, you know.

Things I want to do
with my life.

Duncan, how would you like
to be Fergal's deputy?

Archie: Look, I'm
sorry. I really thought

Fergal was the best man
for the job.

Obviously.

Not content with that,
you gave him Duncan.

Golly, I want
to say to you

that there is no one around
here more valuable to me

than you-

professionally
and personally.

Actions speak louder
than words, sir.

Archie, I'm just gonna show
Katrina the otter hole I found.

All right.
Good.

See you later, Arch.

See ya.

You know... thanks again.

I think I'm really
gonna love it here.

I'm sure you will.
You'll do a great job.

Fergal:
Katrina... wait up.

So, have you ever seen
an otter before?

Oh, yes.

Well?

Some might say you're the
biggest fool in Scotland.

Not me.

What you did today
took guts.

Integrity.

You've gone a long way
up in my estimation.

If that's
any comfort.

Thanks, Lex.

Come on.

( sighs )

What are you doing?

We are just taking your
whiskey for a walk, Archie.

Aren't we, Kilwillie?

Kilwillie!

I'm sorry, old man. She
cut me off at the pass.

Molly, you had no right!

Kilwillie and I have made
a little deal, haven't we?

A deal? Kilwillie,
I was once told

that when you were
a tubby little tyke at Eton,

you used to cheat
at conkers.

I didn't believe it,
until now!

The last Lagganmore Peculiar
to come up for auction

went for �600 a bottle!

This cask
will fill 20 bottles,

and I will give you
15 grand,

plus one bottle back.

What, for father?

No.

For your firstborn, Archie.

My little stipulation.

Kilwillie: Archie,
I've brought the check.

Excellent.

This should just cover Fergal's
salary for the first year.

Hector:
How marvelous.

Thank you.

Ha ha ha!

Oh, what a day!
I need a drink.

Molly:
It's almost teatime.

No, no, mother,
a proper drink.

A legendary drink.

A drink to ward off
evil spirits

and ungenerous
thoughts and...

general unhappiness.

Ooh...
what a very good idea!

Archie...
you don't mean...

what do you say,
Kilwillie?

Oh, why not?

Come on.

Let's all get
as squiffy

as 40 Billy goats!

A frabjous day at last!

Kilwillie: Well... magical moment.

To your firstborn,
Archie.

And don't hang about.

The way things are going,
I wouldn't hold your breath.

Slainte.

All:
Slainte.

Mmm.

( all coughing )

It's gone off.

Tough luck, old man.
It's gone off!

Ha ha ha!

( theme music playing )

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