All language subtitles for Early Doors S02 E03 1080p WEB-DL AAC2 0 H 264-BTN_track3_[eng]1

- ♪ You never have to feel that the
night is yours alone

♪ Rushing through the stars

♪ Captivated by the worlds beyond

♪ You are alone

♪ It's a small world

♪ And you've grown. ♪

- Question number 37.

Name the sisters who shot to fame
pioneering women's rights?

- Oh yeah, easy.
- (Who is it?)

Oh... Oh, yeah.

- I think it's the Nolans, Joan.
- Shh!

Question 38 is a spelling question.

How do you spell promulgate?
- What?

- Promulgate.

- What? I've never heard of it.

Or to make known officially".

To promulgate.

- It's a new one on me. How's it
spelt?

- P-R-O... Hey, you crafty get!

Any more of that and you're barred.

Now come on, settle down.

Question 39.

What is the capital of Chile?

- Is it Con Carne, Eddie?

- Santiago.

- Here, when are we going to have that
Pickles question, Ken?

- Oh! Question 40, the final question.

What was the name of the dog that
found the World Cup after it was
stolen in 1966?

- I'll go and get the sarnies ready.

See you in a bit.
- All right.

The answers to that last section.

A chance for you all to buy a drink.
After all, this is a pub and not a
doss house, Tommy.

Before you all stampede to the bar,
does anybody want any of those
questions repeating?

- Can you repeat number 39, please,
Ken?

- Certainly, gents. Question 39.

What is the capital of Chile?

- Cheers, Ken.

- You got any more of that nice malt
left, Ken?

- Bloody hell.

Aye-aye. What's going on here?

- Bloody machine! It's not on, this.
- You're right.

The landlord'll sort it out for you.

- Oh aye, and sort me out first.

Bollocks to it.

Hey, you haven't got any, have you?
- Have I balls. She's on the Pill.

I don't have a bath with my socks on
any more.
- Oh, lucky man.

- Not that lucky, Dean. Can't remember
when I last had a bath.

- Bloody hell. Have you been eating
asparagus?

- Oh, aye. Organic ones.

He makes a fortune on that bloody
machine, you know.

Nobody ever asks for money back, cos
they're too embarrassed.

Apart from Debbie. I hope you're
looking after her.

She's a nice girl, Melanie.

- Oh, yeah, no, I'm looking after her.

- That's what the last one said. Then
he dropped her like a ton of bricks.

Bloody shameless, he was.

- Do you think she still misses him?

- I'm sure there is a part of him she
still misses,

but nothing to worry about.

- I'm not worried. It's his loss.

She's got everything I could want in a
girl.

- You're right.
- And her dad owns a pub.

- Hey-hey! Don't get any better than
that, does it?

Why don't you go and ask old Tommy if
you can borrow a johnny off him?

- He doesn't have any, does he?

- No, I'd just love to see his face
when you asked him!

- 40 grand.

- That's £4.98, love.
- No, it's more than that, Ken.

- No, yours is on me, love.

- Thanks, Ken. Hey, I'll come behind
there and help you out, you know.

- Oh, aye. After the sneaky peek at
the quizmaster's answers, eh?

- I'll show you mine if you show me
yours!

- There's no favouritism.

You're not getting anywhere near them
answers.
- Oh, spoilsport!

You got so much as your names right.

- You cheeky sod!
- You're favourite for the booby
prize, though.

- Hey, I'll wear this top again.

- < Just put San Diego, I'm sure it's
San Diego.

- Look at her.

All over him like a rash. Have you
seen her?

- Mmm.

No mistaking her intentions, is there?

- Should have seen her when he were in
bed with flu.

- Why, what was she like?
- Oh, up and down like a bride's
nightie!

Taking him hot toddies, filling his
hot-water bottle, checking his
temperature...

proper little Florence Nightingale.

- Ooh, was she?

- I'll say. Then she's coming up every
four hours with a spoonful of medicine
for him.

- I bet he's not the first bloke she's
give a dose to, either.

- You said it, Winnie. Do you want a
barley sugar?

- See you later, love.

- Hiya, ladies.

- Hello, Tanya, love!

What are you grinning at?

You look like the cat who got the
cream.

- Just having a laugh with Ken.

- Oh, you seem to be doing a lot of
that these days.

- I just get on with him, that's all.

- I think he'd prefer it if you were
getting off with him.

- Well, he's supposed to be taking me
out for a drink

for looking after the pub when he had
the flu.

- Is he?
- Nice one!

- But he hasn't said anything since.

I think he might have gone off the
idea.
- No! He's probably just a bit slow on
the uptake.

- Hmm, my husband's like that. A bit
slow.

But in the bedroom he's like greased
lightning.

But without the grease, or the
lightning.

- Oh, she's right, though, Tanya. He
just needs a poke up the arse.

- Hey! Hang on a minute. They've not
even been on a date yet!

Hey!

- Here, Joe, Joe. Did you know the
answer to that Pickles question?

World Cup, Pickles, did you know it?

Ho ho! Yeah, cos I knew it, you see.

Ooh, didn't I, Joan?
- Yeah.
- Right.

- I've known it for quite a while,
actually. Did you know it, Dean?

- Yeah, yeah, I knew that one.

- So did I. Pickles.
- Yeah, I know.

I heard you ask Ken to put it in last
night.

Would be, though, did I? Eh?

Did you know that one, Duffy?
- What?

- The question about the dog, Pickles?

- Oh, I couldn't give a shite about
this poxy quiz, Eddie.

He's only put it on to get more
punters in here.

World Cup in 1966, Pickles.

Yeah. Me and Joan knew it.

- All right. We get the picture about
pissing Pickles! Bloody hell!
- Righto.

- Duffy?
- Yeah?

- Have you heard from your missus?

- No, not yet.

I'm not bothered, though. I don't care
if I never see her again.

- He's on 40 grand a year, in't he?

- Have you seen her?
- No, I was in Bargain Booze last
night.

You'd just been in there for your
cider.

The manager was saying you were going
on about it to him, till he asked you
to leave.

- Shithouse!

- Here, do you want to join our team,
Tommy? You know, pool our brains.

- No, thanks. I'll stay on my own.

- Oh, righto.

Another one taking it too seriously,
Joan.

- It's his loss, Eddie.
- Yeah.

- Please, Eddie.

- Yeah. Oh, shall we just have halves?

Help us stay focused.
- Yeah.

Get us two halves each, Eddie.

We'll show 'em!

- Ooh, coming up, my love.

I'll have two halves of bitter, and
two halves of Guinness and black.

- I'll tell you what, I'll put them
both in pint pots for you, eh?

- Good idea, Ken.

That was a bit of a close shave, eh?

You know, Pickles.

- Bloody hell, Eddie. You've asked me
to put a question in you know

and you're always asking me when it's
coming up!

Night nerves got to me.
- I don't know.

Let's hope MI5 never offer you the
job, eh?

- Oh! MI5!

Yeah, I've been very discreet about my
jury service, though, haven't I?

- Oh, aye. We're all in the dark about
them two lads

who turned over the bookies on Green
Lane,

getting away in a stolen white Ford
Focus.

- I never said it was white.

Oh, has Joan been blabbing again?

Oh, yeah, women, eh, Ken?

Hmm. It's my own fault, though.

Pillow talk, you see.

- Give us £4.20, Eddie.

- Oh. There you go. Exactamundo.

Oh, we've had a great night, Ken.
Yeah, we really enjoyed it, us.

- Cheers, Eddie. It seemed to go OK.

I'm going to do it again. Same time
next Monday.

- Oh, definitely, Ken. You can count
us two in.

Great news, my love.

Everybody's really enjoying the quiz.

Ken's going to do it again next
Monday.

- Oh, great. Hey, Eddie, I'll write
all the answers down, then, and save
them in my purse till next week!

- Ooh, good idea, my love!

None of these idiots in here'll think
to do that.

Most of them didn't even know who
Pickles was!

- You all right, Tommy?

- Not really. I feel terrible.

- Oh, 'eck. You haven't got yourself
in a round by mistake?

- Oh, it's the flu. You've given it to
me, haven't you?

It's dangerous, the flu, at my age.

They told me that at the hospital
today.
- At the hospital?

Oh, it's not that bad, is it?
- No, I just went for my regular
check-up.

- Oh, I see.

So what did they say?

Are you still alive, or have they got
to wait until they get the results
back?
- Piss off!

- You all right, gents?

- What's tickled you, Ken?
- Old Tommy feeling sorry for himself.

- What's up with him?
- He's got the flu.

- It's going around like wildfire,
in't it?

- Oh, don't worry, he's too tight to
part with it.

- It's this Chinese flu, isn't it?

- Oh aye, it's terrible.
- But we can't be caught saying that
any more, Ken.

- What?
- Chinese flu. It's not PC.

- You are having me on!
- We're not.

PCs have got to be PC now.

You can't be an un-PC PC any more.

- You can't talk about race, creed,
colour.

It's racism that, sexism this, which
is fine. I agree with all that.

It's wrong. There's no place for it in
today's society.

But you can't even laugh at dwarves
any more, Ken.

Where did it all go wrong?

- I don't know.
- When they're in the panto and you're
paying £35 a ticket, that's fine.

They want you to laugh at them then.

But you see the same fellow out
shopping on Deansgate,

and tell you to piss off!

Didn't he, Phil?
- He did.

- How are you doing with them sarnies,
love?

- Nearly done, Dad.

- Whoa, go easy with that corned beef!

Slice it thinner.

It's not a bloody Jacobean banquet.

Shite.

- ♪ Don't get me wrong... ♪

- I've just found something out in the
toilets.

But you're not going to like it.

- What is it?
- Your Ken is meant to be going on a
date with her very soon.

- Who, Tanya?

- Yes. He's promised her. For looking
after him when he was poorly.

- When are they going?

- Well, she's just waiting for him to
say. She's on pins, apparently.

- I bet she is.

Well, I hope he remembers what I told
him at teatime.

- Why, what did you tell him?

- "It's only two minutes since your
last one run off with your best
friend.

"And she were your own age.

"How long do you think it'd take
Tanya?"

- Oh, heck. What did he say?

- "Thanks for reminding me, Cupid. I
were nearly getting carried away."

His usual sarky self.

I just don't want him to get hurt
again, Winnie.

Just look at her. Done up like a dog's
dinner.

Have you seen that top she's nearly
wearing?
- I have.

The display cabinet's been left open
tonight, hasn't it?

- And the trophies are definitely on
show.

- Mmm.

There's a good chance your Kenny'll be
polishing 'em next week, an' all.

- Sandwiches, anybody?

- ALL: Wahey!

Thanks, Melanie.

- Oh, oh hold on, Tommy, leave some
for us!
- Thanks, Melanie, love.

- Would you like a sandwich? Joan,
Eddie?

- What have you got, Melanie?
- We've got corned beef, or egg
mayonnaise.

- Ooh, I love egg mayonnaise.
- Oh, do you think you should, Joan?

You haven't been for three days.

Have you not got anything a bit less
binding.

- This is all we've got, Eddie.
- Oh, righto.

Thanks, Melanie.

Ooh, Joan, Joan, what is the name of
the dog that found the World Cup in
1966? Pickles!

Here, Tommy, what's the name of the
dog that found the World Cup in 1966?

Pickles!

Hey, lads, lads! Lads, hey!

What's the name of the dog that found
the World Cup in 1966?

Pickles.

- What's he like? I know where he can
shove 'em.

- You having a couple more, lads?

Hey, Dean, have you asked Jo and Duffy
yet?

- Tell your dad to get that machine
fixed.
- What are you on about?

- Do you want to come to Mel's 21st?

- Oh, aye.
- Yeah.

- Brilliant! I'm not sending out
invites, so just turn up.

- Oh, right. Smashing.
- Dean, I'm done now, so I'm going
home.

See you in a bit.

- (I didn't know.)

- Right, here we go. Can you all swap
your papers now.
- Here you are.

- Here you are.

Right, Dean.
- Right, come on, settle down.

I'll just take a moment to go over the
prizes again.

It is a box of chocolates.

Right, question 20.

- When word gets out about your prize,
they'll be battering the door down!

- Hey! They are Ferrero Rocher these,
not just any old chocolates.

- What, have you robbed them from
Ambassador's party?!

- No, but Giro Jim might have done.

Right, eyes down and looking. I'll
just run through quickly.

Showbiz, question 20, the answer is...

John Leslie.
- Yes!

- John Leslie.

A lot of you seem to have got that.

Won't the papers leave him alone, hey?

Let him get on with his life, the poor
sod.

Question 21, the answer to that is
that John Leslie again!

- Yes!
- Um, question 22, come on, come on
now give over.

Question 22, is a bit of a tricky
question this one.

Anybody who put John Leslie, well
you're wrong.

It was in fact Stan Collymore.

- Oh!
- That's Stan Collymore.

- Do you base all these questions on
the News of the World, Ken?

- You can do it next week, smartarse.

Question 23, the answer is Ulrika
Jonsson.

- Yes!
- Ulrika Jonsson.

- He's just put, "weather girl, bit of
a slapper"!

- I will accept that.

- I'm going to go up and see Mel, all
right?

- Don't be long. We could be up for
the chocolates.
- Thanks to me.

- Question 24. The term we were
looking for was cruising.

That is cruising.

And the answer to Question 25 of
course, is Kevin Spacey.

- Never heard of him.
- Oh, Kevin Spacey.

- I love him.
- Kevin Spacey.

- Thought you was doing the quiz,
Einstein!

- No, I thought I would come and quiz
you now.
- Oh, yeah?

- Yeah. Question number one, is there
any chance of you...?

So I will finish.

- Not tonight you won't, Romeo. I've
got these pots to wash.

That kettle is boiling.

- Spoilsport.
- You had better put some bromide in
yours.

- Hey, have you told your dad, then?

- No.

Not quite sure what to say.

- How about me and Dean are thinking
of getting a flat together?

I know it's a bit subtle but he would
work it out eventually.

- Don't be funny.

It's OK for you, you've already left
home.

But it's a big step for me.

And my dad.

- Well he is not moving in with us, is
he?

- You know what I mean.

I get on with him really well, we have
a good laugh me and me dad and he'll
miss that.

- I tell you what,

why don't you two get a flat and I'll
stay here?!

- I had a look in the estate agent's
window today though.

- Yeah, you see.

I knew you were warming to it.

Did you see 'owt?
- I saw lots of things.

Nothing we could afford, though.

- Hey, don't worry something good will
come up. I promise.

- I know.

But if we wait and save we might be
able to get something better.

They had a really nice semi.

- I've already got one of those.

- I had a feeling you have.

- That's Catherine Zeta Jones. Oh,
yes!

Catherine Zeta Jones.
- Yes!

- Did we get that one, Eddie?

- Oh, no, this is Tommy's paper, isn't
it?

- Question number 34, the slang term
for young male prostitutes

is rent boys.
- Oh, yes.

- Rent boys.

Question number 35, the answer is Fred
Elliott.
- Oh, yes.

- Fred Elliott
- Yes, yes.

- I say, I say.
- I love Fred.

- Question number 36, the picture
question. This threw a lot of you.

People thought it was Les Dawson, but
it was Anne Widdecombe.

- Oh!
- Anne Widdecombe.

- No chance.
- I know it was a bad photocopy.

- Yes!

- You're making it up as you go along.

You let them put anything down.
- I wish somebody'd put you down!

- Hey!

- Oh!

- Are you all right, Tommy?
- No, I'm not. I'm dying.

- Hang on, I'll write for an
ambulance.

- Oh!
- You'll spread your germs.

- ALL: Oh! Ew!!

- Right, moving on.

- Question number 37.

The sisters who shot to fame
pioneering women's rights

- Yes! Oh.

- Emily and Charlotte Pankhurst.

- When are we going to have that
Pickles answer, Ken?

- Question number 38.

The correct spelling of promulgate.

It's P-R-0...

omulagte.

Question 39.

The capital of Chile

is Santiago.
- Yes!
- Oh!

- Question 40.

The name of the dog who found the
World Cup when it went missing in
1966,

the answer is...

Pickles.
- Oh!

Yes!
- Yes, we got that one.

- I told you. Oh, Pickles.

- Does anybody want any repeated?

- Yes. Number 32, please, Ken.

- No problems, gentleman. That was the
three-part question, wasn't it?

Let me see. The answers were A, Blue
Peter,

B, Wheel of Fortune, and C, This
Morning.
- Yes.

- My lovely assistant Tanya will come
and collect all the papers.

I shall look at them and make sure
there's been no fiddling.

Then shortly we will announce the
winner.

- Oooooh!

- MUSIC STARTS UP ON JUKEBOX

- Bloody hell! Stop it.
- We've had this one.

- Get on with it. Give us all a break.

Have you got no hearts, you lot?

Can't you see the man is suffering?

Talk about insensitive, I don't know.

Do you need any change, Duffy?
- No, I'm all right, thanks Ken.

- I was talking to the lad that fills
it up, he reckons he's got most of
them records.
- Oh, right.

- After The Love Is Gone, Love On The
Rocks and Alone Again, naturally.

He's got the lot.
- Oh, good. Yeah.

- Trouble is, this is just your luck,

the prices go up on Friday, 30p a
play. One door opens, hey?

- I don't care. It is only money.

- That's the spirit, Duffy.

Good lad.

You all right in there, lads?

- Right as nine pence, Ken.

- Give it here, miss. Let's both have
a laugh.

What did the Romans call London?

They've put "the Smoke"!

- Yeah. If they was any thicker they'd
set.

- It's gone down well though, the
quiz.
- Has it balls.

There's only three more people in -
One works for me, another one is my
mother.

Tommy's right, if Mam and Winnie have
another drink this night is going to
costing me.

At least when the pub's closed I know
I will be breaking even.

- You just need to give it more time.

- It is a good job Duffy is a broken
man, hitting the top shelf.

There's only him keeping us afloat.

Drowning myself in the canal.

- Don't say that, Ken.
- I'm not joking, either.

- No, don't, it will be all right.

You'll turn the corner soon.

- Do you think so?
- I know so.

Your luck is going to change soon,
fella, I promise you.

- How did you work that out?

- You're just going to have to trust
me, that's all.
- Thanks, love.

♪ Young girl, get out of my life

♪ My love for you is way out of line

♪ Better run, girl

♪ You're much too young, girl. ♪

Do you want to know who won this quiz,
or what?

- Wahey!

- Well, piss off then.

THEY ALL TALK AT ONCE

- What's going on?
- You don't want to know, Jean.

- We'd give them something to talk
about if we went out for that drink.

- We would, yeah.

- I'll, um, get back then should I?

- Yeah, OK, love. Yeah, right, yeah.

- Will be great when we get our own
place. Won't it?

- Mmm, fantastic.

- Waking up together every morning in
our own home. I can't wait.

- Go to bed together every night, I
can't wait!

- Do you ever think of anything else!

- Not when you're around.

- Not here!

What if my dad or Nana come up?

- Don't be daft their downstairs doing
that quiz all night.

- Did you, um, manage to get anything?

- I got the one about Pickles the dog!

- OK, ladies and gentlemen. Can I have
your attention please?

- Oooh!
- This is the moment you have all been
waiting for.
- Are you handing your notice in?

- Boo!

The very first Grapes pub quiz.
- Oooh!

- Tell your friends. That's if you've
got any.

- Oooh!
- Because we are doing it all again
next Monday.

Right, the results are as follows -
the winners of the booby prize,

packet of peanuts, with one correct
answer, Eddie and Joan!

Pickles that would have been!

- Oh, cheers, Ken.
- Nice one, Eddie.

- Oh, yeah, Pickles!

- Oh, well done, Eddie.

- Now first second and third in
reverse order -

in third place with 20 points, old
Tommy.

- And I've got the flu!

- In second place with 29 points,
Tanya, Debbie and Nicola.

Let's hear it for the Golden Girls!

- Hand it over, Ken.
- Come to Daddy.

- Let's hear it for...

Phil and Nige!

- Oh, you're joking!

I'm not having that.
- Fix!

- Worthy winners.
- Fix, fix.
- You have to wind the session down
now, Ken.

- Bloody hell! No way! Not having it.

- Get some bloody work done!

- The quizmaster's word is final. Now
settle down.
- Let's pinch the chocolates.

- I left them upstairs, I'll go up and
get them.

- Don't worry, we'll pick them up
tomorrow.

We don't want to be here if a riot
breaks out.

- Oh, hang on, on second thoughts.

If Mam sees them there will be nowt
left.

I'll nip up and get them.
- All right, Ken, whatever.

- He's given them the answers, hasn't
he? The creeping sod!

- Has he balls.

- W-Wh...?

- What's all the fuss about? I've told
you we won it fair and square.

We're not going to lie to you about
summat like that.

We're coppers, aren't we?

- Bent coppers.

- Ssshhh. Quieten down will you?

We're on duty here.
- Yeah, have a bit of respect for the
law.

1038, 1038, receiving, over.

- 'Roger, 1038.

'The capital of Chile is definitely
Santiago.'

- ♪ Rushing through the stars
captivated by the worlds beyond

♪ So far

♪ I'm known

♪ Floating in the car

♪ Past the gates that must destroy
that calm

♪ You aren't alone

♪ It's a small world

♪ And you've grown. ♪