All language subtitles for T3006200614022024P.english

Subtitles by: ® nando359
for *seventhartgames.win*

Good luck.

Hi. Uh, I have an appointment
with Emily Charlton?

Andrea Sachs?
Yes.

Great. Human Resources certainly
has an odd sense of humor.

Follow me.

Okay, so I was Miranda's
second assistant...

but her first assistant recently got promoted,
and so now I'm the first.

Oh, and you're replacing yourself.
Well, I am trying.

Miranda sacked the last two girls
after only a few weeks.

We need to find someone who can survive here.
Do you understand?

Yeah. Of course. Who's Miranda?

Oh, my God. I will pretend
you did not just ask me that.

She's the editor in chief of Runway,
not to mention a legend.

You work a year for her, and you can
get a job at any magazine you want.

A million girls would kill for this job.

It sounds like a great opportunity.
I'd love to be considered.

Andrea,
Runway is a fashion magazine...

so an interest in fashion is crucial.

What makes you think
I'm not interested in fashion?

Oh, my God.

No! No! No!

What's wrong?

She's on her way. Tell everyone!

She's not supposed to be here
until 9:00.

Her driver just text messaged,
and her facialist ruptured a disk.

God, these people!
Who's that?

That I can't even talk about.

All right, everyone! Gird your loins!

Did somebody eat an onion bagel?

Sorry, Miranda.

Move it! Ooh!

I don't understand why it's so difficult
to confirm an appointment.

I know. I'm so sorry, Miranda.
I actually did confirm last night.

Details of your incompetence
do not interest me.

Tell Simone I'm not going to approve that girl
that she sent me for the Brazilian layout.

I asked for clean, athletic, smiling.
She sent me dirty, tired and paunchy.

And R.S.V.P. Yes
to the Michael Kors party.

I want the driver to drop me off at 9:30
and pick me up at 9:45 sharp.

9:45 sharp.
Call Natalie at Glorious Foods,
tell her no for the 40th time.

No, I don't want dacquoise. I want tortes
filled with warm rhubarb compote.

Then call my ex-husband and remind him the
parent-teacher conference is at Dalton tonight.

Then call my husband, ask him to meet me
for dinner at that place I went to with Massimo.

Tell Richard I saw the pictures that he sent
for that feature on the female paratroopers...

and they're all so deeply unattractive.

Is it impossible to find a lovely,
slender female paratrooper?

No.
Am I reaching for the stars here? Not really.

Also, I need to see all the things that Nigel
has pulled for Gwyneth's second cover try.

I wonder if she's lost any
of that weight yet. Who's that?

Nobody. Um, uh-

Human Resources sent her up about the new
assistant job, and I was preinterviewing her.

But she's hopeless
and totally wrong for it.

Clearly I'm going to have to do that myself
because the last two you sent me...

were completely inadequate.

So send her in. That's all.

Right.

She wants to see you.
Oh! She does?

Move!

This is foul. Don't let her see it. Go!
That's-

Who are you?

Uh, my name is Andy Sachs.

I recently graduated
from Northwestern University.

And what are you doing here?

Well, I think I could do a good job
as your assistant.

And, um-

Yeah, I came to New York to be a journalist
and sent letters out everywhere...

and then finally got a call
from Elias-Clarke...

and met with Sherry
up at Human Resources.

Basically, it's this or Auto Universe.

So you don't read Runway?
Uh, no.

And before today,
you had never heard of me.

No.

And you have no style
or sense of fashion.

Well, um, I think that depends
on what you're-

No, no. That wasn't a question.

Um, I was editor in chief
of the Daily Northwestern.

I also, um, won a national competition
for college journalists...

with my series on thejanitors'union,
which exposed the exploitation-

That's all.

Yeah. You know, okay.

You're right. I don't fit in here.

I am not skinny or glamorous...

and I don't know that much
about fashion.

But I'm smart.

I learn fast
and I will work very hard.

I got the exclusive
on the Cavalli for Gwyneth...

but the problem is, with that huge
feathered headdress that she's wearing...

she looks like she's working
the main stage at the Golden Nugget.

Thank you for your time.

Who is that sad little person?

Are we doing a before-and-after piece
I don't know about?

Brown and Law, please?
Thank you.

Andrea.
Hmm?

Wait. You got a job
at a fashion magazine?

Mm-hmm.
What was it, a phone interview?

Wow.
Ow! Don't be a jerk.

Miranda Priestly is famous
for being unpredictable.

Okay, Doug. How is it
that you know who she is and I didn't?

I'm actually a girl.
Oh!

That would explain so much.
Look, seriously.

Miranda Priestly is a huge deal.
I bet a million girls would kill for that job.

Yeah, great.
The thing is I'm not one of them.

Look, you gotta start somewhere, right?

I mean,
look at this dump Nate works in.

I mean, come on.
Paper napkins? Hello.

Yeah. And Lily, she works at that gallery
doing, uh, you know-

Oh, I'm sorry. What exactly is it
that you do anyway?

Well, lucky for me,
I already have my dream job.

You're a corporate research analyst!

Oh, you're right. My job sucks.
No!

It sucks. I don'tIt's boring.
It's all right. Breathe.

I'm trying.
Here. Take a drink.

I will have a drink. I will have a drink.
Ah, yes.

I'd like to propose a toast.
To jobs that pay the rent.
To jobs that pay the rent.

Jobs that pay the rent.

Oh, baby. You should see the way
these girls at Runway dress.

I don't have a thing to wear to work.

Come on. You're gonna be
answering phones and getting coffee.

You need a ball gown for that?

I think I might.

Well, I happen to think
you look great always.

Aww! I think you're full of it.

Hey. Come on. Let's go home.
Yeah.

I can think of something we can do
that doesn't require any clothing.

Really?
Mmm.

Hello?

Andrea, Miranda decided to kill
the autumn jacket story for September...

and she is pulling up
the Sedona shoot from October.

You need to come into the office right this
second and pick up her coffee order on the way.

Now?
Now, get a pen and write this down.

Now?
Now, get a pen and write this down.

I want one no-foam skimmed latte
with an extra shot...

and three drip coffees
with room for milk.

Searing hot. And I mean hot.

Hello?

Where are you?
Oh, I'm almost there. Yeah.

Shoot! Oh!

Is there some reason
that my coffee isn't here?

Has she died or something?

No. God.

Oh. Bloody time.

I hope you know that this
is a very difficult job-
Mm-hmm.

For which you are totally wrong.

And if you mess up,
my head is on the chopping block.

Now, hang that up.
Don't just fling it anywhere.

Okay. First of all,
you and I answer the phones.

The phone must be answered
every single time it rings.

Calls roll to voice mail,
and she gets very upset.

If I'm not here-Andrea, Andrea-

you are chained to that desk.

Well, what if I need to-
What? No.

One time an assistant left the desk because
she sliced her hand open with a letter opener...

and Miranda missed Lagerfeld...

just before he boarded
a 17-hour flight to Australia.

She now works at TVGuide.

Man the desk at all times. Got it.

Uh-
Miranda Priestly's office.

No, she's not available.

Who is it?

Yes, I will tell her
you called... yet again.

Right. Remember, you and I
have totally differentjobs.

I mean, you get coffee-
and you run errands.

Yet I am in charge of her schedule...

her appointments and her expenses.

And, um, most importantly, um...

I get to go with her to Paris
for Fashion Week in the fall.

I get to wear couture.
I go to all the shows and all the parties.

I meet all of the designers.
It's divine.

Okay. Now, stay here. I'm going to
the art department to give them the Book.

The-
This is the Book.

Now, it is a mock-up of everything...

in the current issue.

And we deliver it to Miranda's apartment
every night, and she retu-

Don't touch it. She returns it to us
in the morning with her notes.

Now, the second assistant
is supposed to do this...

but Miranda is very private
and she does not like strangers in her house.

So until she decides
that you are not a total psycho...

I get the lovely task
of waiting around for the Book.

Oh, Emily? What do I do-

Deal with it.

Hello. Mrs. Priestly's office.

Hmm. That's what I meant.
Miranda Priestly's office.

Um, you know, she is in a meeting.
Can I please take a message?

Uh-huh.

Okay. Can you please spell Gabbana?

Hello?

I guess not.

I guessed an eight and a half.

Um, uh, that's very nice of you...

but I don't think I need these.

Miranda hired me.
She knows what I look like.

Do you?

Emily.

Emily?

She means you.

Wejust cut on the bias.
That's not what I asked you.

I couldn't have been clearer.
There you are, Emily.

How many times do I have to scream your name?
Actually, it's Andy.

My name is Andy.
Andrea, but, uh, everybody calls me Andy.

I need 10 or 15 skirts from Calvin Klein.

What kind of skirts do you-
Please bore someone else with your questions.

And make sure we have Pier 59
at 8:00 a.m. Tomorrow.

Remind Jocelyn I need to see a few of those
satchels that Marc is doing in the pony.

And then tell Simone I'll takeJackie
if Maggie isn't available.

Did Demarchelier confirm?
D-Did D-Demarchel-

Demarchelier.
Did heGet him on the phone.

Uh, ookay.

And, Emily?
Yes?

That's all.

It's just the cavalier disregard
for clear directions-

Do you have Demarchelier?

Uh, Demarchelier.

Leave it.
Do you have-

I have Miranda Priestly calling.

I have Patrick!

Uh, no, she called me in there
and-and then she asked me about Pier 59.

And there was something
about Simone, Frankie, someone else.

And, um, she needs skirts
from Calvin Klein.

And, uh, there was something
about a pony.

Did she say which skirts?
No. No.

Did she say what kind? Color, shape, fabric?
I tried to ask her.

You may never ask Miranda anything.

Right. I will deal with all of this,
and you will go to Calvin Klein.

EhMe?

Oh, I'm sorry. Do you have
some prior commitment?

Some hideous skirt convention
you have to go to?

Uh-

Miranda?

Are you there?
I'm about to walk in. I'll call you as soon as-

Hello? Hi.
While you're out...

Miranda needs you to go to Hermès
to pick up 25 scarves we ordered for her.

Okay.
Cassidy forgot her homework at Dalton.
Pick that up.

Miranda went out to meet with Meisel, and
she will want more Starbucks when she gets back.

Hot Starbucks.
Can you just repeat that first-

Hello?

Oh, my God.

What took you so long?
I have to pee!

What?
You haven't peed since I left?

No, I haven't. I've been manning
the desk, haven't I? I'm bursting.

Oh, hi.

You do coat. Do the coat!

Okay.

Now, be prepared.
The run-through is at 12:30.

People are panicking, so the phone
is going to be ringing off the hook.

The ru-The run-through. Right.

Yes. Editors bring in options for the shoot,
and Miranda chooses.

She chooses every single thing
in every single issue.

Run-throughs are a huge deal.
I don't know why you don't know that, Andrea.

Okay. Are you ready?
Oh, hi, hi.

Right. Well, after the loo,
Serena and I are going to lunch.

This is herthe new me.
Hi.

Told you.
I thought you were kidding.

No, quite serious, yeah.
I get 20 minutes for lunch, and you get 15.

When I come back, you can go.
Okay.

What exactly is she wearing?

Her grandmother's skirt.

Hmm. Corn chowder.

That's an interesting choice.

You do know that cellulite is one
of the main ingredients in corn chowder.

So none of the girls here eat anything?

Not since two became the new four
and zero became the new two.

Well, I'm a six.
Which is the new 14.

Oh. Shoot.

Oh, never mind. I'm sure you have plenty
more polyblend where that came from.

Okay. You think my clothes are hideous.

I get it.

But, you know, I'm not going
to be in fashion forever...

so I don't see the point of changing everything
about myself just because I have this job.

Yes, that's true.

That's really what this multibillion-dollar
industry is all about anyway, isn't it?

Inner beauty.

Hello.

Right. Come on.

Miranda's pushed the run-through
up a half an hour.
Mmm!

She's always 15 minutes early.
Which means?

You're already late. Come.
Shoot!

Excuse me.

Mr. Ravitz.

Nigel.

Issue going well?
Oh, yes. Our best September ever.

Great. Heard Miranda killed autumn jackets
and pulled up the Sedona shoot.

What's that costing me?

About 300,000.

Must have been some lousy jackets.

Irv Ravitz.
Oh, I'm sorry.

This is Andy Sachs,
Miranda's new assistant.

Congratulations, young lady.

A million girls would kill for that job.

Bye-bye.

Hmm?
Chairman of Elias-Clarke, Irv Ravitz.

You know what they say?
Tiny man, huge ego.

No. And I've seen all this before.

Theyskens is trying to reinvent
the drop waist, so actually it's-

Where are all the other dresses?
We have some right here.

Stand, watch and listen.
And I think it can be very interesting-

No. No, I just-
It's just baffling to me.

Why is it so impossible
to put together a decent run-through?

You people have had hours and hours
to prepare. It's just so confusing to me.

Where are the advertisers?

We have some pieces from Banana Republic.
We need more, don't we?

Oh. This is-This might be-
What do you think of-
Yeah.

Well, you know me.

Give me a full ballerina skirt
and a hint of saloon and I'm on board.

But do you think it's too much like-
Like the Lacroix from July?

I thought that, but no, not with
the right accessories. It should work.

Where are the belts for this dre-
Why is no one ready?

Here. It's a tough call.

They're so different.
Hmm.

Something funny?

No. No, no. Nothing's-

You know, it's just that both those belts
look exactly the same to me.

You know, I'm still learning
about this stuff and, uh-

"This... stuff"?

Oh. Okay. I see.

You think this has nothing
to do with you.

You go to your closet...

and you selectI don't know-
that lumpy blue sweater, for instance...

because you're trying to tell the world
that you take yourself too seriously...

to care about what
you put on your back.

But what you don't know
is that that sweater is not just blue.

It's not turquoise. It's not lapis.

It's actually cerulean.

And you're also blithely unaware
of the fact...

that in 2002, Oscar de la Renta
did a collection of cerulean gowns.

And then I think it was
Yves Saint Laurentwasn't it-

who showed cerulean military jackets?

I think we need a jacket here.
Mmm.

And then cerulean quickly showed up
in the collections of eight different designers.

And then it, uh, filtered down
through the department stores...

and then trickled on down
into some tragic Casual Corner...

and then trickled on down
into some tragic Casual Corner...

where you, no doubt,
fished it out of some clearance bin.

However, that blue represents
millions of dollars...

and countless jobs...

and it's sort of comical how you think
that you've made a choice...

that exempts you
from the fashion industry...

when, in fact...

you're wearing a sweater that was selected
for you by the people in this room...

from a pile of stuff.

So then I said,
"No, I couldn't see the difference...

between the two
absolutely identical belts"...

and you should have seen
the look she gave me!

I thought the flesh
was gonna melt off her face.

It's not funny.

She's not happy unless everyone around her
is panicked, nauseous or suicidal.

And the Clackers just worship her.

The who?
They call them Clackers.

The sound that their stilettos make
in the marble lobby.

It's like,
"Clack, clack, clack. Clack, clack."

And they all act like
they're curing cancer or something.

The amount of time and energy...

that these people spend on these insignificant,
minute details, and for what?

So that tomorrow they can spend
another $300,000 reshooting something...

that was probably fine to begin with...

to sell people things they don't need!

God!

I'm not even hungry anymore.
What?

That is why those girls are so skinny.
Oh. No, no, no.

Give me that. There's, like,
eight dollars ofJarlsberg in there.

You know what?

I just have to stick it out for a year.
One year.

And then I can do
what I came to New York to do.

But I can't let Miranda get to me.
I won't.

Easy there, tiger.

Oh, good morning, Miranda.
Get me Isaac.

I don't see my breakfast here.
Are my eggs here? Where are my eggs?

Excuse me!

Pick up the Polaroids
from the lingerie shoot.

Have the brakes checked on my car.

Where's that piece of paper
I had in my hand yesterday morning?

The girls need new surfboards or
boogie boards or something for spring break.

Hello.
The twins also need flip-flops.

Ow!
Oh, my gosh!

Pick up my shoes from Blahnik,
and then go get Patricia.

Who's that?
Good girl! Good girl! Good girl!

Get me that little table
that I liked at that store on Madison.

Get us a reservation for dinner tonight
at that place that got the good review.

Get me Isaac.
Thirty-six thank-you notes delivered today.

Where is everyone?
Why is no one working?

Get me Demarchelier.

I have Miranda Priestly calling for-
Okay.

I have Patrick.

Thank God it's Friday, right?

At least Miranda will be in Miami,
so we don't have to be on call this weekend.

You know,
my dad's coming in from Ohio.

Yeah, we're gonna go out to dinner,
maybe see Chicago.

You doing anything fun this weekend?

Yes.

Yeah, Nate said it was great.

He actuallyHe applied here, but they
wanted someone with more experience.

Here.
Huh? What's this?

I don't want you
to get behind on your rent.

Dad, how did you-
It's-

I'm gonna kill Mom.

Dad, thank you.

Mm-hmm.

It's really good to see you.
You too, honey.

So, you want to
start grilling me now...

or should we wait till after dinner?

I thought I'd let you at least enjoy
the bread basket first.

No, no, no. It's okay.
Go right ahead.

We're just a little worried, honey.

We get e-mails from you
at your office at 2:00 a.m.

Your pay is terrible.
You don't get to write anything.

Hey, that's not fair.

I wrote those e-mails.

I'm just trying to understand why someone
who got accepted to Stanford Law...

turns it down to be a journalist,
and now you're not even doing that.

Dad, you have to trust me.

Being Miranda's assistant
opens a lot of doors.

Emily is going to Paris
with Miranda in a few months...

and she's gonna meet editors and writers
from every important magazine.

And in a year, that could be me.

All right?
Mm-hmm.

Dad, I swear, this is my break.

This is mymy chance.

This is my boss.

I'm sorry, Dad. I have to take this.
Take it. Take it.

Hello. Miranda?
My flight has been canceled.

It's some absurd weather problem.

I need to get home tonight. The twins have
a recital tomorrow morning at school.

What?
At school!

Absolutely. Let me see what I can do.
Good.

Hi. Um, I know this
is totally last minute...

but I was hoping that you
could maybe get a flight for my boss...

from Miami to New York tonight?

Uh-

It's right here. Thank you.
Yeah, any kind ofjet.

From Miami to New York.
Thank you.

Yup, I need it tonight. I need it-
Ow!

I thought you were going out the other-
Sweetie! No.

It's over here, honey.
Tonight.

Hi. I'm trying to get a flight tonight-
for tonightfrom Miami to New York.

Yes, I know there's a hurricane.

Nothing is flying out?
What do you mean, nothing is flying out?

It's for Miranda Priestly,
and I know that she's a client of yours.

Yes. Yes, hi. I need a jet tonight
from Miami to New York.

Yeah. Sorry. Hold on.
Hello? Miranda, hi.

I'm trying to get you a flight, but no one
is flying out because of the weather.

Please. It's just-
I don't knowdrizzling.

Someone must be getting out.

Call Donatella. Get her jet.

Call everybody else
that we know that has a jet. Irv?

Call everyThis is your responsibi-
This is yourjob.

Get me home.

Oh, my God!
She's going to murder me.

What does she want you to do, call the National
Guard and have her airlifted out of there?

Of course not. Could I do that?

Come on.

Come on.

The girls' recital
was absolutely wonderful.

They played Rachmaninoff.
Everyone loved it.

Everyone except me...

because, sadly, I was not there.

Miranda, I'm so sorry.

Do you know why I hired you?

I always hire the same girl-

stylish, slender, of course...

worships the magazine.

But so often, they turn out to be-

I don't knowdisappointing and, um...

stupid.

So you, with that impressive résumé...

and the big speech
about your so-called work ethic-

I, umI thought you
would be different.

I said to myself, go ahead.

Take a chance.

Hire the smart, fat girl.

I had hope.

My God. I live on it.

Anyway, you ended up
disappointing me more than, um-

more than any of the other silly girls.

Um, I really did everything
I could think of.

Uh-
That's all.

Excuse me!
Where do you think you're going?

She hates me, Nigel.

And that's my problem because-

Oh, wait. No, it's not my problem.

I don't know what else I can do because
if I do something right, it's unacknowledged.

She doesn't even say thank you.

But if I do something wrong,
she is vicious.

So quit.
What?

Quit.
Quit?

I can get another girl to take your job
in five minutesone who really wants it.

No, I don't want to quit.
That's not fair.

But, you know, I'm just saying
that I would just like a little credit...

for the fact
that I'm killing myself trying.

Andy, be serious.

You are not trying.

You are whining.
L-

What is it that you want me
to say to you, huh?

Do you want me to say, "Poor you.
Miranda's picking on you. Poor you. Poor Andy"?

Hmm? Wake up, six.

She's just doing herjob.

Don't you know that you
are working at the place...

that published some
of the greatest artists of the century?

Halston, Lagerfeld, de la Renta.

And what they did, what they created...

was greater than art
because you live your life in it.

Well, not you, obviously,
but some people.

You think
this is just a magazine, hmm?

This is not just a magazine.

This is a shining beacon of hope for-

oh, I don't know-

let's say a young boy growing up
in Rhode Island with six brothers...

pretending to go to soccer practice
when he was really going to sewing class...

and reading Runway under the covers
at night with a flashlight.

You have no idea how many legends
have walked these halls.

And what's worse, you don't care.

Because this place, where so many
people would die to work...

you only deign to work.

And you want to know why
she doesn't kiss you on the forehead...

and give you a gold star on your homework
at the end of the day.

Wake up, sweetheart.

Okay. So I'm screwing it up.
Mmm.

I don't want to.

I just wish that I knew
what I could do to-

Nigel?
Hmm?

Nigel, Nigel.

No.

I don't know what you expect me to do.

There's nothing in this whole closet
that'll fit a size six.

I can guarantee you.

These are all sample sizes-
two and four.

All right. We're doing this for you. And-
A poncho?

You'll take what I give you
and you'll like it.

We're doing this Dolce for you.
Hmm!

And shoes.

Jimmy Choo's.
Hmm.

Manolo Blahnik.
Wow.

Nancy Gonzalez. Love that.

Okay, Narciso Rodriguez.
This we love.

Uh, it might fit. It might.
What?

Okay. Now, Chanel. You're in desperate
need of Chanel. Darling, shall we?

We have to get to the beauty department,
and God knows how long that's going to take.

I mean, I have no idea
why Miranda hired her.

Me neither. The other day,
we were in the beauty department.

She held up the Shu Uemura eyelash curler
and said, "What is this?"

I just knew
from the moment I saw her...

she was going to be
a complete and utter disas-

Miranda Priestly's office.

No, actually, she's not available,
but I'll leave word.

Okay, thanks. Bye.

How did-

Are you wearing the-
The Chanel boots?

Yeah, I am.

You look good.

Oh, God.
What?

She does.
Oh, shut up, Serena.

See you guys tomorrow.
Good night, man. Take it easy.

Take care of that finger, huh?

So, what do you think?

Uh, I think we better get out of here...

before my girlfriend sees me.

The gowns are fabulous.

Mm-hmm.
We're gonna use the burgundy.

Gotta find-

So we spent a whole semester
on potatoes alone.

You take the fry and squeeze it.

See how firm that is?
Hey. Oh, I'm so sorry I'm late.

There was a crisis
in the accessories department.

I needed to find a python headband.
Python's hot right now.

I have exciting presents for all of you.

Are you ready?

What is that?
It's a Bang & Olufsen phone.

Charlie Rose sent it to Miranda
for her birthday.

I looked it up on line.
It's $1,100.

What?
Wow!

And I have some products.
Mason Pearson hairbrushes.

A little Clinique.
Ooh!

Oh, damn it. I love your job.
Oh! One more.

A little thing.

Do you want it? You wantOh.
Gimme! Gimme, gimme, gimme!

I think she likes it.
Oh, my God! This is the new MarcJacobs!

This is sold out everywhere.
Where did you get this?

Miranda didn't want it, so-

No, no, no, no, no. This bag is, like, $1,900.
I cannot take this from you.

Yeah, you can.

Why do women need so many bags?
Shut up.

You have one. You put all your junk in it,
and that's it. You're done.

Fashion is not about utility.

An accessory is merely
a piece of iconography...

used to express individual identity.

Oh! And it's pretty.
That too.

Yeah. But the thing is, it turns out there is
more to Runway than just fancy purses.

Look, here's an essay byJay Mclnerney,
a piece byJoan Didion.

Even an interview
with Christiane Amanpour.

Looks like someone's been drinking the Kool-Aid.
What do you-

I got it. It's-Yup, the Dragon Lady.

Oh, Miranda?
Let me talk to her.

I need that.
I'll tell her to get her own scrambled eggs.

Lily, no, no, no! Put that thing up!
I was gonna answer it!

It's gonna make-
Give me the... phone.

Hi, Miranda.

Ooh. Shh.
Absolutely.

Shh!
Uh-huh. I'm leaving right now.

You know, you guys
didn't have to be such assholes.

Um, excuse me.

I'm looking forJames Holt.

Um, that's him right there.

Oh. Thanks.
No problem.

I put my stuff out there, and I pray they improve.
Really?

Excuse me.
Hi.

I'm Andy.
I'm picking up for Miranda Priestly.

Oh, yes.
You must be the new Emily.

Nice to meet you.

Oh, let me see that bag. Very, very nice.
Ah.

Distressed, studded leather, pieced by hand,
finished with a metallic fringe.

Very nice, indeed.
Who made that fantastic thing?

You.

Hmm. Duh. This way.

Uh, here we go.

It's a sketch of Miranda's dress
for the benefit.

Also the centerpiece of my spring collection.
Top secret stuff.

I'll guard it with my life.
Please do.

Come on.
You're working for Miranda Priestly now.

You must be in desperate need
of hard liquor.

Excuse us, girls.

She'll have the punch.

It's deadly. Have fun.

He's right, you know.
Hmm?

The punch.
I drank it atJames's last party.

I woke up in Hoboken wearing nothing
but a poncho and a cowboy hat.

Ah. Well.

Wise.

Uh, hi.
Christian Thompson.

Christian Thompson?
You're kidding.

No, you're-You write for,
like, every magazine I love.

I actuallyI reviewed your collection
of essays for my college newspaper.

Did you mention my good looks
and my killer charm?

No, but-
What do you do?

Oh. Well, I want to work for somewhere
like The New Yorker or Vanity Fair.

I am a writer too.
Is that right?

Mm-hmm.
I should read your stuff.
Why don't you send it over?

Yeah?

That would be-Thank you.
That would be great.

But actually, right now, I'm working
as Miranda Priestly's assistant.

Oh, you're kidding.
Well, that's too bad.

That's-Whoa.
You'll never survive Miranda.

Excuse me?
Well, you seem nice, smart.

You can't do that job.

Gotta go.

Okay.

Well, it was very, very nice
to meet you, Miranda girl.

Emily?

Call James Holt's office. Tell them I want
to move the preview up to today at 12:30.

Tell everybody else.
Be ready to leave in half an hour.

But we're not expected until Tuesday.
Did she say why?

Yes. Yeah, she explained every detail
of her decision making.

And then we brushed each other's hair
and gabbed about American Idol.

I see your point.

What's a preview anyway?
Good morning, Miranda.

Miranda insists upon seeing
all the designers'collections...

before they show them.

Great to see you.
Hello, James.

And she tells them what she thinks?
In her way.

Uh, this season really began for me
with a meditation...

on the intersection
between East and West.

There's a scale.
One nod is good. Two nods is very good.

There's only been one actual smile on record,
and that was Tom Ford in 2001.

An obi belt.

She doesn't like it, she shakes her head.

This is the dress that we have designed
specifically and exclusively for you.

Then, of course,
there's the pursing of the lips.

Which means?

Catastrophe.

Just, uh-Just go.

I just don't understand. I'm appalled.
It's absurd. Appalled.

You deal with it.
I'll talk to him.

So because she pursed her lips,
he's gonna change his entire collection?

You still don't get it, do you?

Her opinion is the only one
that matters.

Call my husband and confirm dinner.
At Pastis? Done.

And I'll need a change of clothes.

Well, I've already messengered
your outfit over to the shoot.

Fine. And, Andrea, I would like you
to deliver the Book to my home tonight.

Have Emily give you the key.
Mm-hmm.

Guard this with your life.
Of course.

You know, if I can deliver the Book,
that means I must have done something right.

I'm not a psycho.

Oh, and, you know,
she called me Andrea?

I mean, she didn't call me Emily,
which isIsn't that great?

Yeah, whoopee. Right.

Now, it's very important that you do
exactly what I'm about to tell you.

Oh. Okay.

The Book is assembled by 10:00, 10:30...

and you must wait around for it
until then.

You will be delivering Miranda's
dry cleaning with the Book.

Now, the car will take you straight
to Miranda's townhouse.

You let yourself in.

Andrea. You do not talk to anyone.

Do not look at anyone.

This is of the utmost importance.
You must be invisible.

Do you understand?
Uh-huh.

You open the door
and you walk across the foyer.

You hang the dry cleaning
in the closet across from the staircase.

Uh-
And you leave the Book
on the table with the flowers.

Shit!
It's that door to the left.

Okay.

Thank you.

You can give the Book to us.
Shh. Which-Which table?

It's okay. Come on up.
No, I can't. I can't.

What? It's okay.
Come on.

Yeah, come on. It's okay.
Please stop talking.

Or you can bring the Book upstairs.
Emily does it all the time.

She does? Right.
She does, all the time.

Yeah? Okay.

What did you expect me to do,
walk out in the middle of a cover shoot?

I rushed out of
an investment committee meeting...

and I sat there waiting for you
for almost an hour.

I told you the cell phones didn't work.
Nobody could get a signal out.

I knew what everyone
in that restaurant was thinking-

there he is, waiting for her again.

Okay, okay! Okay, okay.
Oh, no. Shh!

It really wasn't that big a deal.
I promise.

The twins said hello,
so I said hello back.

Then I went up the stairs
to give her the Book and-
You went upstairs?

Oh, my God. Why didn't you just climb into bed
with her and ask for a bedtime story?

Okay, I made a mistake. I know.

Andrea, you don't understand.

If you get fired,
that might jeopardize Paris for me.

If that happens, I will search every Blimpie's
in the tristate area until I track you down.

She's gonna fire me?

I don't know. She's not happy.

Andrea?

Miranda, about last night, l-

I need the new Harry Potter book
for the twins.

Okay. Okay. I'll go down
to Barnes & Noble right now.

Did you fall down and smack
your little head on the pavement?

Not that I can recall.

We have all the published Harry Potter books.
The twins want to know what happens next.

You want the unpublished manuscript?

We know everyone in publishing.
It shouldn't be a problem, should it?

And you can do anything, right?

Yes, Bobbsey. I know, baby.

Mommy's working very hard
to get it for you.

She doesn't get it.

I could call frickin'J.K. Rowling herself.
I'm not gonna get a copy of that book.

My girls are leaving on the train
for their grandmother's at 4:00...

so the book better be here
no later than 3:00.

Of course!
And I would like my steak here in 15 minutes.

No problem!

Okay. I have four hours
to get the impossible manuscript.

Smith & Wollensky's doesn't open until 11:30.
How am I gonna get the steak?

Okay. I will be back in 15 minutes.

Wish me luck!
No. Shan't.

Yes, yes, yes, yes. I've been on hold.
It's for Miranda Priestly.

It's very important.

Yes, I know it's impossible to get...

but, well, I was wondering if you
could make the impossible possible...

if that's at all possible.

Yes, I'm calling about
the Harry Potter manuscript.

Uh, no. Unpublished.

Not a chance?

Tell her that it's for Miranda Priestly.

'Cause I think it makes a difference.

Let me call you back.

You probably don't remember me.
We met atJames Holt's party.

I'm Miranda Priestly's assistant.

The Harry Potter manuscript?
Oh, you're kidding.

Uh, sorry to ask, but I'm desperate.

Just tell her it can't be done.
You'll have to come up with a Plan "B."

Well, this is Miranda Priestly
we're talking about.

There is no Plan "B."
There's only Plan "A."

Is she back? Am I fired?

I rarely say this to people
who aren't me...

but you have got to calm down.

Bloody hell!

Coat, bag.

What's that? Oh, I don't want that.
I'm having lunch with Irv.

I'll be back at 3:00.
I'd like my Starbucks waiting.

Oh, and if you don't have
that Harry Potter book by then...

don't even bother coming back.

Hello.

Quit? Are you sure?

I failed.
She's gonna fire me anyway.

I might as well beat her to the punch.
Wow.

Andy, good for you.
Congratulations. You're free.

Yeah. Well, listen, I'll call you later.
Okay.

Hello.

I'm brilliant. No, really.

Monuments should be erected in my honor.
You didn't.

Oh, yes. A friend of a friend
does the cover art...

and she happens
to have the manuscript.

Oh, no, 'cause that would mean
that I actually did something right.

It's justOh!

The thing is, Christian, I was just-

Look, you want this thing, you better hurry.
I'll meet you at the St. Regis.

Excuse me.

Welcome to the St. Regis.
May I assist you with anything?
Oh. Yes.

Uh, I'm meeting someone at the King Cole Bar.
Right this way.

Hi.

You have one hour.
Thank you.

One copy. What are my twins
gonna do with that? Share?

Oh, no, I made two copies...

and had them covered, reset and bound
so that they wouldn't look like manuscripts.

This is an extra copy to have on file.
You know, just in case.

Well, where are these fabulous copies?
I don't see them anywhere.

They're with the twins,
on the train on the way to Grandma's.

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