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1
00:00:01,900 --> 00:00:05,050
Don't be closed. Please don't be closed!
2
00:00:05,100 --> 00:00:07,010
Oh, God! Thank you, Jesus!
3
00:00:07,060 --> 00:00:08,250
You're not closed!
4
00:00:08,300 --> 00:00:09,850
OK, great, great, quick, quick!
5
00:00:09,900 --> 00:00:11,170
Which shoes?
6
00:00:11,220 --> 00:00:13,170
Wow! God, it's like you've been, erm...
7
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.. looted!
8
00:00:14,300 --> 00:00:16,210
It's totally barren in here.
9
00:00:16,260 --> 00:00:18,050
Right, where, where are the, erm...
10
00:00:18,100 --> 00:00:19,610
.. black school shoes?
11
00:00:19,660 --> 00:00:20,810
Black shoes?
12
00:00:20,860 --> 00:00:22,210
Can anyone help me?
13
00:00:22,260 --> 00:00:23,930
No. OK.
14
00:00:23,980 --> 00:00:25,250
Erm, you. OK. Hello.
15
00:00:25,300 --> 00:00:27,170
Where are the, erm, back-to-school shoes?
16
00:00:27,220 --> 00:00:29,690
The, the black, black school shoes?
17
00:00:29,740 --> 00:00:31,250
They, er... Oh!
18
00:00:31,300 --> 00:00:32,610
Ha.
19
00:00:32,660 --> 00:00:35,490
Do you have this in a, erm, 3.5?
20
00:00:35,540 --> 00:00:37,250
That's a baby shoe.
21
00:00:37,300 --> 00:00:38,370
Right.
22
00:00:38,420 --> 00:00:41,380
Do you have any black shoes in a 3.5?
23
00:00:47,740 --> 00:00:49,410
Come on, Ivy!
24
00:00:49,460 --> 00:00:51,780
I did tell you to break
them in round the house!
25
00:00:54,500 --> 00:00:56,450
What did you do for your holidays, Liz?
26
00:00:56,500 --> 00:00:59,130
Lee took the kids for two weeks,
so I spent it with the Bransons
27
00:00:59,180 --> 00:01:00,410
on Necker Island.
28
00:01:00,460 --> 00:01:02,770
Sunbathing topless and
sucking off billionaires.
29
00:01:02,820 --> 00:01:04,850
- Really?
- I had to work the whole time.
30
00:01:04,900 --> 00:01:07,050
The kids went into seven
different sports clubs,
31
00:01:07,100 --> 00:01:09,170
which they absolutely hated!
32
00:01:09,220 --> 00:01:12,330
- But, on a positive, they're now
county level at badminton. - Oh...
33
00:01:12,380 --> 00:01:15,410
I enjoyed every minute of the hols,
I took the kids camping in Dorset.
34
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Magical.
35
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Great toilet block, and sinks with taps,
36
00:01:19,180 --> 00:01:20,770
so more glamping, really.
37
00:01:20,820 --> 00:01:23,770
Jill joined us on the Saturday, for lunch.
38
00:01:24,900 --> 00:01:26,010
I was just thinking that!
39
00:01:26,060 --> 00:01:27,890
Who is that?
40
00:01:27,940 --> 00:01:29,930
Oh, that's Meg, Jade's mum.
41
00:01:29,980 --> 00:01:31,770
She's actually got two
other kids of her own,
42
00:01:31,820 --> 00:01:34,410
and two stepchildren,
but they're very close.
43
00:01:34,460 --> 00:01:35,890
She's a REAL high-flyer.
44
00:01:35,940 --> 00:01:37,810
I believe she did a
talk at Davos last year.
45
00:01:37,860 --> 00:01:39,170
Who's her favourite Spice Girl?
46
00:01:39,220 --> 00:01:41,730
She's friends with my friend
Sally. Do you know Sally Lawson?
47
00:01:41,780 --> 00:01:43,490
She dated Marco Pierre White for a while.
48
00:01:43,540 --> 00:01:45,330
- Oh, how is Sally?
- You don't know her, Kevin.
49
00:01:45,380 --> 00:01:47,690
They've just bought the
house opposite you, Julia!
50
00:01:47,740 --> 00:01:49,410
How do you not know that?!
51
00:01:49,460 --> 00:01:53,090
We all know each other on my street.
I suppose I'm very community-minded.
52
00:01:53,140 --> 00:01:54,530
How can she have five kids?
53
00:01:54,580 --> 00:01:56,530
You can't be a high
flyer and have five kids.
54
00:01:56,580 --> 00:01:59,410
I've got two children and
a job I phone in and I...
55
00:01:59,460 --> 00:02:01,650
.. already have incredibly
low self-esteem.
56
00:02:01,700 --> 00:02:03,570
Who does she thinks she
is, Nicola Horlick?
57
00:02:03,620 --> 00:02:05,530
Oh, I love Horlicks. Do
you remember Horlicks?
58
00:02:05,580 --> 00:02:07,210
Oh, do you remember Bovril?
59
00:02:07,260 --> 00:02:10,570
Well, Sally knows Nicola
Horlick, so I think, yeah,
60
00:02:10,620 --> 00:02:12,730
Nicola could be a friend of Meg's, yeah.
61
00:02:12,780 --> 00:02:15,050
No, no, she can't possibly
have time for friends,
62
00:02:15,100 --> 00:02:16,570
I think that's just spin.
63
00:02:16,620 --> 00:02:18,130
That's pretty un-feminist of you.
64
00:02:18,180 --> 00:02:19,410
Oh, my God!
65
00:02:19,460 --> 00:02:20,810
I think you hate women!
66
00:02:20,860 --> 00:02:22,580
Nope, I hate everybody.
67
00:02:24,260 --> 00:02:25,970
- Hi, hiya. - Oh! - Hi, Anne.
68
00:02:26,020 --> 00:02:27,810
Hello, Anne!
69
00:02:27,860 --> 00:02:30,090
You're looking healthy!
70
00:02:30,140 --> 00:02:31,930
Oh, it's very nice of you to say.
71
00:02:31,980 --> 00:02:34,890
I feel like over the holidays I
kind of filled out a bit, so...
72
00:02:34,940 --> 00:02:36,490
Yeah, that's what I meant!
73
00:02:36,540 --> 00:02:38,490
No, you look great!
74
00:02:38,540 --> 00:02:41,730
It's all Sophie's Choice, isn't it,
when we get older? Face or arse.
75
00:02:41,780 --> 00:02:43,610
Oh, I dread to think which
I'll have to choose!
76
00:02:43,660 --> 00:02:46,050
- You're pressing against me a
bit there, Anne. - Sorry, sorry.
77
00:02:46,100 --> 00:02:48,010
Sorry to hear about Johnny, Amanda.
78
00:02:48,060 --> 00:02:50,890
You were such a dynamic,
attractive couple.
79
00:02:50,940 --> 00:02:52,970
If there's anything we can do to help...
80
00:02:53,020 --> 00:02:54,690
He's not dead, Kevin.
81
00:02:54,740 --> 00:02:58,010
It's absolutely amicable, we
have so much love and respect
82
00:02:58,060 --> 00:03:00,050
for each other, we just...
83
00:03:00,100 --> 00:03:02,370
.. realised we needed space to grow...
84
00:03:02,420 --> 00:03:03,690
.. apart.
85
00:03:03,740 --> 00:03:06,290
Well, that's a crock of shit.
But, anyway, welcome to the club.
86
00:03:06,340 --> 00:03:08,010
The good news is, now you're a single mum,
87
00:03:08,060 --> 00:03:09,650
you get 10% off at Dorothy Perkins.
88
00:03:09,700 --> 00:03:12,130
Well, I'm not a single
mum, Liz, I'm a co-parent.
89
00:03:12,180 --> 00:03:14,650
- There's a big difference.
- You wait to till he gets on Tinder.
90
00:03:14,700 --> 00:03:16,450
See how much of a co-parent he is then.
91
00:03:16,500 --> 00:03:18,100
I'm not going to rise to it, Liz.
92
00:03:19,140 --> 00:03:20,770
Come on, kids.
93
00:03:20,820 --> 00:03:21,930
Come on, sweetheart.
94
00:03:21,980 --> 00:03:23,010
Bye!
95
00:03:23,060 --> 00:03:24,810
- Bye! Be good, sweetheart!
- See you later.
96
00:03:24,860 --> 00:03:27,770
Who's coming for a coffee
and a bitch about Amanda?
97
00:03:27,820 --> 00:03:30,690
Oh, God, I wish I could,
but I've got to go to work.
98
00:03:30,740 --> 00:03:33,370
They're streamlining, it's going
to be absolutely horrible.
99
00:03:33,420 --> 00:03:35,090
I mean, horrific, you know,
100
00:03:35,140 --> 00:03:37,850
if you can think of the most brutal
film you've seen, like, erm...
101
00:03:37,900 --> 00:03:40,130
Watership Down.
102
00:03:40,180 --> 00:03:41,570
Yeah, well, wish me luck.
103
00:03:41,620 --> 00:03:43,370
- Right, I'm off, too.
- How's the new job?
104
00:03:43,420 --> 00:03:45,130
Where is it again? Kidistan?
105
00:03:45,180 --> 00:03:47,130
No! Kiddiverse.
106
00:03:47,180 --> 00:03:48,850
It's a soft play centre.
107
00:03:48,900 --> 00:03:50,890
They say it's London's largest ball pit.
108
00:03:50,940 --> 00:03:53,690
You've obviously never been to
Love Muscle on a Friday night.
109
00:03:53,740 --> 00:03:55,330
Good one! No, it's really great.
110
00:03:55,380 --> 00:03:57,130
Part-time, so I can still drop the kids.
111
00:03:57,180 --> 00:03:59,330
Very average wage, so Jill
doesn't feel threatened.
112
00:03:59,380 --> 00:04:01,450
Free eye tests. The whole package, really.
113
00:04:01,500 --> 00:04:03,930
I'm sure I can get you a discount,
if you want to bring the kids.
114
00:04:03,980 --> 00:04:06,570
Thanks, but I'd rather have an episiotomy.
115
00:04:06,620 --> 00:04:08,220
All right, I'm out of here.
116
00:04:10,620 --> 00:04:12,540
Anne? Cake?
117
00:04:17,740 --> 00:04:19,060
Where's Viv?
118
00:04:20,460 --> 00:04:22,530
Julia? Can I, er, grab you for a minute?
119
00:04:22,580 --> 00:04:23,900
Yes.
120
00:04:26,980 --> 00:04:29,050
Bad news is we are streamlining,
121
00:04:29,100 --> 00:04:32,210
but the good news is
we're getting rid of Viv.
122
00:04:32,260 --> 00:04:35,330
So that means you get to take her job!
123
00:04:35,380 --> 00:04:37,490
It's an opportunity for promotion, Julia.
124
00:04:37,540 --> 00:04:39,770
So I'd be doing two people's jobs?
125
00:04:39,820 --> 00:04:42,010
You're looking at this the wrong way.
126
00:04:42,060 --> 00:04:43,890
It's more money, and it's a step up,
127
00:04:43,940 --> 00:04:47,690
and technically, it's three people's
jobs, because Carl's gone too.
128
00:04:47,740 --> 00:04:49,170
So...
129
00:04:49,220 --> 00:04:52,650
.. you know, have a think, but
if you do decide not to accept,
130
00:04:52,700 --> 00:04:55,050
then Martin is our next choice.
131
00:04:55,100 --> 00:04:57,330
Martin's only been here for six months
132
00:04:57,380 --> 00:04:59,690
and he's already had a written
warning about his breath.
133
00:04:59,740 --> 00:05:02,890
I get it. It's a big step, 'course it is,
134
00:05:02,940 --> 00:05:05,690
so, er, you know, take your time.
135
00:05:05,740 --> 00:05:08,100
Give it a mull, think it through.
136
00:05:09,260 --> 00:05:10,970
OK, great. Thanks, Andrew.
137
00:05:11,020 --> 00:05:12,290
No worries.
138
00:05:12,340 --> 00:05:14,840
But you do need to let us
know by tomorrow morning.
139
00:05:19,940 --> 00:05:20,930
Si, certo. Certo!
140
00:05:20,980 --> 00:05:22,050
What are you doing here?
141
00:05:22,100 --> 00:05:24,570
Late on breakfast club payments.
142
00:05:24,620 --> 00:05:26,290
She's going to turn me upside down
143
00:05:26,340 --> 00:05:29,130
and shake the change out of my pockets.
144
00:05:29,180 --> 00:05:30,490
What's her problem?
145
00:05:30,540 --> 00:05:32,530
Why does she have to
make us all feel so shit?
146
00:05:32,580 --> 00:05:34,130
What's YOUR problem?
147
00:05:34,180 --> 00:05:36,890
Hate to agree with Amanda, but
it's a bit un-feminist of you.
148
00:05:36,940 --> 00:05:38,530
No, it's un-feminist of HER!
149
00:05:38,580 --> 00:05:40,410
I thought we all agreed, as feminists,
150
00:05:40,460 --> 00:05:43,810
that, nowadays, it's
un-feminist to have it all.
151
00:05:43,860 --> 00:05:45,610
Parliamo domani.
152
00:05:45,660 --> 00:05:47,180
Si, arrivederci.
153
00:05:53,740 --> 00:05:56,850
Ivy came to school today
in non-regulation shoes.
154
00:05:56,900 --> 00:05:59,450
Ooh, well, I'm sorry, Mrs Lamb,
if my daughter is bang on-trend.
155
00:05:59,500 --> 00:06:01,850
They're too big for her and
they have a kitten heel.
156
00:06:01,900 --> 00:06:04,890
Dress for the job you want, I always say.
157
00:06:04,940 --> 00:06:08,330
Fine. Well, I will add,
erm, late-night shoe shopping
158
00:06:08,380 --> 00:06:10,730
to the list of things
I have to do tonight.
159
00:06:10,780 --> 00:06:12,220
Next.
160
00:06:15,060 --> 00:06:17,090
That is an incredible woman.
161
00:06:17,140 --> 00:06:18,490
Do you take Nectar points?
162
00:06:18,540 --> 00:06:19,810
Lamb?
163
00:06:19,860 --> 00:06:21,850
She's a Rottweiler in a jazzy jumper.
164
00:06:21,900 --> 00:06:23,170
That's a power player.
165
00:06:23,220 --> 00:06:24,970
I'd have her working for me.
166
00:06:25,020 --> 00:06:26,300
Right.
167
00:06:27,980 --> 00:06:29,770
Meg! We haven't met properly yet.
168
00:06:29,820 --> 00:06:32,650
I'm sure everyone's
told you, but I'm Amanda.
169
00:06:32,700 --> 00:06:34,050
Da-da!
170
00:06:34,100 --> 00:06:35,290
Amanda!
171
00:06:35,340 --> 00:06:37,890
- My stepdaughter's name is Amanda.
- How funny!
172
00:06:37,940 --> 00:06:39,250
Well, I've got five girls,
173
00:06:39,300 --> 00:06:41,610
so one of them was going to
end up being called Amanda!
174
00:06:41,660 --> 00:06:44,330
We've actually got a friend in common.
175
00:06:44,380 --> 00:06:45,930
Sal Lawson.
176
00:06:45,980 --> 00:06:48,290
- Oh yeah, Sal! - Yeah. - You know Sal?
177
00:06:48,340 --> 00:06:50,570
Yeah, very well, very well.
178
00:06:50,620 --> 00:06:52,490
She's a dear, dear friend of mine.
179
00:06:52,540 --> 00:06:54,010
I don't really like Sal.
180
00:06:54,060 --> 00:06:56,410
I think she's a two-faced bitch, actually.
181
00:06:56,460 --> 00:06:57,890
Yes.
182
00:06:57,940 --> 00:06:59,330
Thank you.
183
00:06:59,380 --> 00:07:02,290
I totally, no, I agree,
I hate that about her.
184
00:07:02,340 --> 00:07:05,650
Right. I'd better run, but
we are getting coffee, OK?
185
00:07:05,700 --> 00:07:07,580
- Yeah, definitely.
- Love it!
186
00:07:15,140 --> 00:07:17,610
I mean, I'd only have to do it
for a couple of years, you know,
187
00:07:17,660 --> 00:07:20,050
- just to get me into that pay bracket.
- Take it, then.
188
00:07:20,100 --> 00:07:23,090
Yeah, I'm already struggling
with the workload that I've got.
189
00:07:23,140 --> 00:07:24,650
- Don't take it, then.
- Yeah, I know,
190
00:07:24,700 --> 00:07:27,130
but then I'm going to be in
just career no-man's-land.
191
00:07:27,180 --> 00:07:28,930
Do you know why it's called no-man's-land?
192
00:07:28,980 --> 00:07:30,570
Because no man is there. It's all women.
193
00:07:30,620 --> 00:07:32,490
- All the men have been promoted.
- Take it, then.
194
00:07:32,540 --> 00:07:34,210
I know, but it's an
extra six hours a week,
195
00:07:34,260 --> 00:07:37,290
- just a shitload of responsibility.
- Don't take it, then.
196
00:07:37,340 --> 00:07:38,610
How does SHE do it?
197
00:07:38,660 --> 00:07:39,770
Take it, then.
198
00:07:39,820 --> 00:07:40,850
Hang on, no.
199
00:07:40,900 --> 00:07:42,090
Don't take it, then.
200
00:07:42,140 --> 00:07:43,650
Which one are we on?
201
00:07:43,700 --> 00:07:44,730
Meg!
202
00:07:44,780 --> 00:07:47,250
Meg, Meg, come join! There's
a seat here. Budge up, Anne.
203
00:07:47,300 --> 00:07:49,330
Oh, you're all right, Mandy,
I'm going to go and sit
204
00:07:49,380 --> 00:07:51,010
- over there by the toilets.
- It's Amanda.
205
00:07:51,060 --> 00:07:52,850
I can't have two Amandas in my life, love.
206
00:07:52,900 --> 00:07:55,410
Well, I can't be Mandy,
I'm obviously not a Mandy.
207
00:07:55,460 --> 00:07:57,890
What can I call you? Big Amanda?
208
00:07:57,940 --> 00:07:59,770
Erm, no!
209
00:07:59,820 --> 00:08:01,090
OK...
210
00:08:01,140 --> 00:08:03,170
.. old Amanda.
211
00:08:03,220 --> 00:08:04,490
Oh...
212
00:08:04,540 --> 00:08:06,130
Double macchiato, yeah? Takeaway.
213
00:08:06,180 --> 00:08:07,530
Have you got your keepy cuppy cup?
214
00:08:07,580 --> 00:08:09,130
Yeah, it's right here in my...
215
00:08:09,180 --> 00:08:11,170
'Course I haven't!
216
00:08:11,220 --> 00:08:12,250
Hi!
217
00:08:12,300 --> 00:08:13,290
All right?
218
00:08:13,340 --> 00:08:15,410
What happens over there
in pony club, then?
219
00:08:15,460 --> 00:08:17,850
Oh, it's basically a self-harm table.
220
00:08:17,900 --> 00:08:20,490
You go there if you want to
feel worse about yourself.
221
00:08:20,540 --> 00:08:21,570
Amanda's the Queen.
222
00:08:21,620 --> 00:08:23,610
All the rest are like
her ladies-in-waiting.
223
00:08:23,660 --> 00:08:26,450
Except for Anne, who's
basically Paul Burrell.
224
00:08:26,500 --> 00:08:28,570
They all hate Anne, but
she knows too much now.
225
00:08:28,620 --> 00:08:31,130
And you're on the table by the
bogs, because you're the freaks,
226
00:08:31,180 --> 00:08:32,970
the outcasts, the cool kids?
227
00:08:33,020 --> 00:08:34,210
Yeah. And Kevin.
228
00:08:34,260 --> 00:08:35,570
Kevin?
229
00:08:35,620 --> 00:08:37,170
Like it.
230
00:08:37,220 --> 00:08:38,690
Right.
231
00:08:38,740 --> 00:08:41,050
All of you are coming
over to mine, tonight.
232
00:08:41,100 --> 00:08:43,610
- Invite your third musketeer.
- Yeah, all right.
233
00:08:43,660 --> 00:08:44,930
You too, chatty chops!
234
00:08:44,980 --> 00:08:46,290
Nah.
235
00:08:46,340 --> 00:08:48,730
Got to go. The kids have got
football in half an hour.
236
00:08:48,780 --> 00:08:51,770
Right, 7pm, don't be late,
don't bring anything.
237
00:08:51,820 --> 00:08:54,370
And don't tell the Stepford Wives!
238
00:08:54,420 --> 00:08:55,780
Cool!
239
00:08:58,380 --> 00:09:01,850
Half a brownie, as long as you
promise to eat your dinner, OK?
240
00:09:01,900 --> 00:09:03,530
Well, excuse me, Mr Weinstein.
241
00:09:03,580 --> 00:09:05,170
Oh, God, I'm, I'm so...
242
00:09:05,220 --> 00:09:07,010
Did I just, I'm so, I'm so sorry!
243
00:09:07,060 --> 00:09:09,010
Double Ds, innit? Hard to miss.
244
00:09:09,060 --> 00:09:10,340
Boop!
245
00:09:11,620 --> 00:09:12,700
Come on, babies.
246
00:09:14,380 --> 00:09:16,610
- We're just leaving, Kev.
- Come on, love! - Oh...
247
00:09:16,660 --> 00:09:18,530
OK, er, never mind, I'll, er...
248
00:09:18,580 --> 00:09:19,620
I'll just, er...
249
00:09:24,260 --> 00:09:25,580
Everybody out!
250
00:09:45,020 --> 00:09:47,530
'.. star of a brand-new
series, starting tomorrow,
251
00:09:47,580 --> 00:09:49,490
and he'll be joining
us here in the studio,
252
00:09:49,540 --> 00:09:51,970
along with the Boy Scouts
live from Kilimanjaro.
253
00:09:52,020 --> 00:09:53,620
But first, let's go over to Tim...
254
00:10:01,380 --> 00:10:03,090
- Yo! - You coming to
Meg's, then, or what?
255
00:10:03,140 --> 00:10:04,850
No, I've got too much work to do.
256
00:10:04,900 --> 00:10:06,250
- What work?
- Head work, Liz.
257
00:10:06,300 --> 00:10:08,330
I need to make a decision
about this bloody job.
258
00:10:08,380 --> 00:10:10,970
Come on, spoilsport. When do we
ever get a night out together?
259
00:10:11,020 --> 00:10:13,290
- Jill's baby-sitting.
- I don't want to go to Meg's, OK?
260
00:10:13,340 --> 00:10:15,010
What's your beef with her? She's great!
261
00:10:15,060 --> 00:10:17,330
Yes, well she's not my type,
Liz! You know, she's all,
262
00:10:17,380 --> 00:10:20,010
"I've got a great career, five
kids and I'm a right bloody laugh."
263
00:10:20,060 --> 00:10:21,770
You know, something's not right, there.
264
00:10:21,820 --> 00:10:24,130
Oh, come for one, it's
only across the road.
265
00:10:24,180 --> 00:10:26,050
You know, you could have a nose about.
266
00:10:26,100 --> 00:10:29,090
She might be a hoarder or a
Scientologist or something!
267
00:10:29,140 --> 00:10:30,570
Fine, I'll get my Crocs.
268
00:10:30,620 --> 00:10:32,410
That's the spirit!
269
00:10:32,460 --> 00:10:33,820
Paul, I'm going out!
270
00:10:36,260 --> 00:10:37,290
Kev!
271
00:10:37,340 --> 00:10:39,650
Jules. Liz. I can't abbreviate your name.
272
00:10:39,700 --> 00:10:40,810
Get in!
273
00:10:40,860 --> 00:10:42,410
Hey!
274
00:10:42,460 --> 00:10:43,450
Mwah!
275
00:10:43,500 --> 00:10:44,650
- All right?
- How are you?
276
00:10:44,700 --> 00:10:46,780
Mwah! Hey!
277
00:10:50,140 --> 00:10:52,450
Liz, Liz!
278
00:10:52,500 --> 00:10:53,740
- Liz.
- What?
279
00:10:54,820 --> 00:10:56,050
Did you see what happened?
280
00:10:56,100 --> 00:10:59,010
- What, no what happened?
- We kissed on the lips!
281
00:10:59,060 --> 00:11:01,530
- Why did you kiss her on the lips?
- I didn't mean to!
282
00:11:01,580 --> 00:11:03,450
She, she, she just came at me!
283
00:11:03,500 --> 00:11:05,250
I, I wasn't expecting it.
284
00:11:05,300 --> 00:11:06,890
It was, it was a timing thing,
285
00:11:06,940 --> 00:11:09,330
we, we were out of sync
with our head moves.
286
00:11:09,380 --> 00:11:11,130
Oh, my God!
287
00:11:11,180 --> 00:11:12,730
What am I going to do?
288
00:11:12,780 --> 00:11:14,690
- Call your wife!
- Call my wife?!
289
00:11:14,740 --> 00:11:16,060
I'm joking, Kevin!
290
00:11:17,620 --> 00:11:19,370
Should I apologise?
291
00:11:19,420 --> 00:11:22,210
It's, it's a tricky time,
you know, culturally.
292
00:11:22,260 --> 00:11:23,330
Post-hashtag.
293
00:11:23,380 --> 00:11:25,890
First the boob and then this!
294
00:11:25,940 --> 00:11:28,570
I don't want her to think I'm
some kind of sexual predator.
295
00:11:28,620 --> 00:11:29,850
Oh, well, just...
296
00:11:29,900 --> 00:11:32,050
.. kiss someone else on the lips, then,
297
00:11:32,100 --> 00:11:34,170
like that's your thing,
like a Spanish man.
298
00:11:34,220 --> 00:11:37,420
The next person you greet, male
or female, kiss them on the lips.
299
00:11:39,460 --> 00:11:40,970
- Oh, hello!
- Hi!
300
00:11:41,020 --> 00:11:42,220
Not her.
301
00:11:44,740 --> 00:11:46,730
Drinks! Wine.
302
00:11:46,780 --> 00:11:49,810
Mmm! THAT is a good one.
303
00:11:49,860 --> 00:11:53,850
Alexa, order 12 bottles
of Sauvignon blanc.
304
00:11:53,900 --> 00:11:54,970
White wine, ladies?
305
00:11:55,020 --> 00:11:56,610
Thanks.
306
00:11:56,660 --> 00:11:57,850
Kev, white or red?
307
00:11:57,900 --> 00:11:59,770
Red, please.
308
00:11:59,820 --> 00:12:01,250
Oh, bloody hell, Lydia!
309
00:12:01,300 --> 00:12:03,130
Put some clothes on,
nobody wants to see that!
310
00:12:03,180 --> 00:12:04,370
Oh no, it's fine.
311
00:12:04,420 --> 00:12:07,330
No, not, not, not fine,
but I'm, I'm totally cool.
312
00:12:07,380 --> 00:12:09,130
Yeah, it's, it's fine.
313
00:12:09,180 --> 00:12:12,090
Are you going to just
sulk all evening, then?
314
00:12:12,140 --> 00:12:14,130
All right? This old git
is my husband, Bill.
315
00:12:14,180 --> 00:12:16,980
Bill, these are the three
pricks I was telling you about.
316
00:12:18,380 --> 00:12:19,450
Hi, Bill.
317
00:12:19,500 --> 00:12:22,290
I'm a hugger, not a kisser
I'm afraid, big man.
318
00:12:22,340 --> 00:12:23,620
Don't mind me!
319
00:12:24,700 --> 00:12:28,210
Erm, Jade just wants me to read
Lightning Thief to her again.
320
00:12:28,260 --> 00:12:30,930
Oh, my God, I loved that
book when I was a kid.
321
00:12:30,980 --> 00:12:31,970
Me too!
322
00:12:32,020 --> 00:12:33,890
When I come back down, I
am going to mix everyone
323
00:12:33,940 --> 00:12:36,250
a wicked little number,
called Ireland's Tears.
324
00:12:36,300 --> 00:12:39,050
Bloody delicious, and lethal.
325
00:12:39,100 --> 00:12:41,690
Lydia, put some trousers on.
326
00:12:41,740 --> 00:12:45,610
Oh, bloody hell, Lyds,
did you just fart on me?
327
00:12:45,660 --> 00:12:48,780
Alexa! Who just farted on me?
328
00:12:54,100 --> 00:12:56,770
'The creature fell to the ground
329
00:12:56,820 --> 00:12:58,380
with a thud and Zeus and...
330
00:13:21,820 --> 00:13:23,890
- Are you going through
my drawers? - No!
331
00:13:23,940 --> 00:13:26,610
I have, er, I've just
had a bit of a headache
332
00:13:26,660 --> 00:13:28,810
and I thought... I was
just looking for a...
333
00:13:28,860 --> 00:13:30,570
Yeah, I was going through your drawers.
334
00:13:30,620 --> 00:13:31,930
Seriously, I do the same.
335
00:13:31,980 --> 00:13:34,340
Canesten's mine, Anusol's Bill's.
336
00:13:35,940 --> 00:13:37,130
You don't like me, do you?
337
00:13:37,180 --> 00:13:39,210
I don't meet many people
who don't like me,
338
00:13:39,260 --> 00:13:40,490
so I can spot it a mile off.
339
00:13:40,540 --> 00:13:42,690
No, I don't...
340
00:13:42,740 --> 00:13:44,330
I think "not like" is quite strong,
341
00:13:44,380 --> 00:13:47,890
er, I just find you quite really annoying.
342
00:13:47,940 --> 00:13:50,410
You know, it's just you
have this massive job
343
00:13:50,460 --> 00:13:52,770
and more children than a frog
and you just never seem to be
344
00:13:52,820 --> 00:13:54,930
fretting -- in fact, you
actively seem quite happy,
345
00:13:54,980 --> 00:13:56,450
and, why, why is that?
346
00:13:56,500 --> 00:13:58,570
I just do what I need to
do when I need to do it.
347
00:13:58,620 --> 00:14:00,490
You can't overthink this shit.
348
00:14:00,540 --> 00:14:03,570
Yeah, you see, that's why
I find you challenging.
349
00:14:03,620 --> 00:14:05,210
It's a work thing, innit?
350
00:14:05,260 --> 00:14:08,010
Something about me touches a nerve...
351
00:14:08,060 --> 00:14:09,970
What is it? Your boss is a prick?
352
00:14:10,020 --> 00:14:12,570
You don't feel like
you're being listened to?
353
00:14:12,620 --> 00:14:15,090
- They're moving you to Leeds?
- No, it's not, it's not that.
354
00:14:15,140 --> 00:14:17,050
But, erm, it's cool, really, I'm, I...
355
00:14:17,100 --> 00:14:19,130
No, no, no lay it on me, I'm all ears.
356
00:14:19,180 --> 00:14:21,050
Seriously, this is what I do.
357
00:14:21,100 --> 00:14:23,970
I'm a trouble-shooter.
It's right up my strasse.
358
00:14:24,020 --> 00:14:25,170
Of course it is.
359
00:14:25,220 --> 00:14:28,050
OK, fine, riddle me this,
wise woman of the woods.
360
00:14:28,100 --> 00:14:29,690
- I've been offered a promotion.
- Great!
361
00:14:29,740 --> 00:14:32,850
- More money, more authority. - Not
as simple as that, actually. - OK.
362
00:14:32,900 --> 00:14:35,090
- Feed me the info.
- Erm...
363
00:14:35,140 --> 00:14:38,050
Well, erm, you know, it,
it, it's really great,
364
00:14:38,100 --> 00:14:39,450
erm, career-wise,
365
00:14:39,500 --> 00:14:42,370
and, erm, I survived a cull,
which is very flattering,
366
00:14:42,420 --> 00:14:45,930
but just, it's a lot more
responsibility and hours, obviously,
367
00:14:45,980 --> 00:14:48,570
and I've only just been able to do my job
368
00:14:48,620 --> 00:14:51,620
and sort of provide entry-level
mothering, so, erm...
369
00:14:52,900 --> 00:14:56,250
Just, I just don't think I can do it.
370
00:14:56,300 --> 00:14:58,290
OK. Bollocks to that.
371
00:14:58,340 --> 00:14:59,890
You can't turn it down.
372
00:14:59,940 --> 00:15:03,370
Cos if you do, you'll get passed
over for promotion and some bloke
373
00:15:03,420 --> 00:15:06,050
who's been there five years less
than you will probably get it,
374
00:15:06,100 --> 00:15:09,050
- probably named Marcus.
- Yeah, I mean, he's called Martin, but, yeah.
375
00:15:09,100 --> 00:15:11,090
I always ask myself,
"What would a bloke do?"
376
00:15:11,140 --> 00:15:13,810
Would he even think about not taking it?
377
00:15:13,860 --> 00:15:16,170
- No, he fucking wouldn't.
- I know.
378
00:15:16,220 --> 00:15:18,370
Yeah, I know. I know!
379
00:15:18,420 --> 00:15:20,050
I know, I know, I know!
380
00:15:20,100 --> 00:15:21,250
I know, I know.
381
00:15:21,300 --> 00:15:23,530
- I know.
- You got to take it, babes.
382
00:15:23,580 --> 00:15:25,420
Lean in, love. Lean in.
383
00:15:26,900 --> 00:15:28,930
Yeah.
384
00:15:28,980 --> 00:15:31,970
Yeah, I think I...
385
00:15:32,020 --> 00:15:33,930
.. I might!
386
00:15:33,980 --> 00:15:35,570
Right!
387
00:15:35,620 --> 00:15:38,370
Alexa! Order me an Uber.
388
00:15:38,420 --> 00:15:40,010
- We're going out.
- Oh!
389
00:15:40,060 --> 00:15:41,830
Oh! No...
390
00:15:42,380 --> 00:15:46,210
I, I, I... I can't come out, I
mean, I'm not even wearing a bra.
391
00:15:46,260 --> 00:15:48,810
So, what? Your tits are like
quails' eggs, just fold your arms
392
00:15:48,860 --> 00:15:50,330
and put a jacket on.
393
00:15:50,380 --> 00:15:52,690
Well, I should go and get my
purse and let my husband...
394
00:15:52,740 --> 00:15:56,050
No. You'll never come back out
again, I know your type. Here.
395
00:15:56,100 --> 00:15:58,690
Liz, Kevin! Get your coats on, chop chop!
396
00:15:58,740 --> 00:16:01,730
Liz, don't you have to get
back for the children tonight?
397
00:16:01,780 --> 00:16:04,730
- No, Lee's got them!
- See? No excuses.
398
00:16:04,780 --> 00:16:07,090
Love it! Very Annie Hall!
399
00:16:07,140 --> 00:16:08,540
Mama!
400
00:16:13,940 --> 00:16:15,780
All right, let's go! Woo!
401
00:16:20,260 --> 00:16:22,770
I did some work for Uber
when they launched over here.
402
00:16:22,820 --> 00:16:24,810
They paid me in Ubers!
403
00:16:26,820 --> 00:16:31,090
Oh, bollocks! I've got a 10:30
work call with Mexico tonight.
404
00:16:31,140 --> 00:16:33,850
What on Earth do you
say to Mexico at 10:30?
405
00:16:33,900 --> 00:16:36,690
Basically, they just want to know
that you're there, you breathe down
406
00:16:36,740 --> 00:16:38,930
the phone to them, ask them
to stick it all in an e-mail.
407
00:16:38,980 --> 00:16:41,690
Lemon squeezy!
408
00:16:41,740 --> 00:16:43,410
You want some Stoli?
409
00:16:43,460 --> 00:16:46,330
I did some consultancy work
for the Latvian government.
410
00:16:46,380 --> 00:16:48,890
They paid me in Stolis! Yeah!
411
00:16:48,940 --> 00:16:52,210
I once did a temp job for a garden
centre, they basically let us take
412
00:16:52,260 --> 00:16:55,490
home any plant that was
definitely going to die.
413
00:16:55,540 --> 00:16:57,530
I operate on gut feelings,
414
00:16:57,580 --> 00:17:01,490
and I knew in my gut that you
were my people, all of you.
415
00:17:01,540 --> 00:17:03,050
You're all good friends,
416
00:17:03,100 --> 00:17:06,170
and that's vital, it's
vital you find your tribe.
417
00:17:06,220 --> 00:17:10,010
The last place I lived? We all had
each other's backs, all the mums.
418
00:17:10,060 --> 00:17:12,890
We were like a battalion. A pack!
419
00:17:12,940 --> 00:17:15,570
We were all there for each
other -- no mum left behind.
420
00:17:15,620 --> 00:17:17,690
Say it!
421
00:17:17,740 --> 00:17:19,890
- No mum left behind!
- Julia?
422
00:17:19,940 --> 00:17:22,650
- No mum left behind.
- Lovely. Liz?
423
00:17:22,700 --> 00:17:25,930
- No... - Mum left
behind! That's right, Liz!
424
00:17:25,980 --> 00:17:28,130
Cheers, sneers!
425
00:17:28,180 --> 00:17:29,860
She's like a TED talk!
426
00:17:31,260 --> 00:17:34,090
- Right... shots! - She's right,
you know, maybe I can do this.
427
00:17:34,140 --> 00:17:36,770
You know, I just need to get
organised. Did you see her calendar?
428
00:17:36,820 --> 00:17:39,210
She's got everything just
meticulously planned out.
429
00:17:39,260 --> 00:17:41,290
I've got a calendar, so...
430
00:17:41,340 --> 00:17:42,690
Oh, shit!
431
00:17:42,740 --> 00:17:44,730
I missed my mum's birthday...
432
00:17:44,780 --> 00:17:47,690
I'd like to propose a
toast to Julia's promotion.
433
00:17:47,740 --> 00:17:50,300
Oh, no, no. I'm not
sure if I'm going to...
434
00:17:51,300 --> 00:17:52,970
Fuck it!
435
00:17:53,020 --> 00:17:54,500
To me!
436
00:17:59,300 --> 00:18:02,290
- Right, I'm going back for the rest.
- The rest?!
437
00:18:02,340 --> 00:18:03,810
- Right, I'm out of here.
- What? Why?
438
00:18:03,860 --> 00:18:06,850
- School night, innit? - It's only
eight o'clock, we'll just have a little
439
00:18:06,900 --> 00:18:08,410
dance and we'll be home by ten, Liz!
440
00:18:08,460 --> 00:18:10,370
That's not how tonight's
going to play out.
441
00:18:10,420 --> 00:18:13,290
That one has a fridge
full of Yops and Red Bulls.
442
00:18:13,340 --> 00:18:15,570
It's a classic '90s come-down concoction.
443
00:18:15,620 --> 00:18:17,850
She's got a 10:30 with Mexico, Liz.
444
00:18:17,900 --> 00:18:21,010
No, I'm off. Got the flat to myself.
445
00:18:21,060 --> 00:18:23,490
My tequila should kick in right
about the time I'm in the bath
446
00:18:23,540 --> 00:18:25,140
- having a wank.
- OK.
447
00:18:26,340 --> 00:18:28,060
- Bye, Liz!
- Bye...
448
00:18:31,700 --> 00:18:32,810
Dammit!
449
00:18:32,860 --> 00:18:35,700
Dammit?! What about me?
That's going to give me PTSD!
450
00:18:38,660 --> 00:18:40,770
Argh!
451
00:18:40,820 --> 00:18:43,500
The music here is shit,
let's go someplace else.
452
00:18:56,620 --> 00:18:59,970
How does she do what she does,
and still be such a goer?
453
00:19:00,020 --> 00:19:01,810
Red Bull and Yop!
454
00:19:01,860 --> 00:19:04,570
Kevin, do you know what, it
might be the tequila talking,
455
00:19:04,620 --> 00:19:06,900
but I'm going to ask her to be my mentor!
456
00:19:14,460 --> 00:19:15,180
Woo...!
457
00:19:23,780 --> 00:19:25,780
I think I'm going to go do a sick!
458
00:19:42,020 --> 00:19:44,050
Oh, God!
459
00:19:44,100 --> 00:19:46,050
Sorry, sorry, it was already out!
460
00:19:48,420 --> 00:19:50,690
- Kenny, what's the time?
- Oh, erm... nearly 10:30!
461
00:19:50,740 --> 00:19:52,340
What are you doing, Kevin?
462
00:19:54,660 --> 00:19:56,330
Hola!
463
00:19:56,380 --> 00:19:58,060
OK, si, muy bien.
464
00:20:02,380 --> 00:20:05,050
Perfecto, Alejandro.
465
00:20:05,100 --> 00:20:08,890
Jill is the only other person on
this planet who's seen my willy.
466
00:20:08,940 --> 00:20:10,730
What about your mum?
467
00:20:10,780 --> 00:20:12,380
How dare you?!
468
00:20:14,780 --> 00:20:16,290
What if she tells Bill?
469
00:20:16,340 --> 00:20:17,980
Or Jill?
470
00:20:19,380 --> 00:20:21,890
I'm going to go talk to her.
471
00:20:21,940 --> 00:20:24,220
Just make sure there no weirdness.
472
00:20:27,340 --> 00:20:28,930
Hi, hi, Meg, listen...
473
00:20:28,980 --> 00:20:31,930
- I just need to clear something up.
- Uh-huh? - I just want you to know
474
00:20:31,980 --> 00:20:33,210
that I had no intention...
475
00:20:33,260 --> 00:20:34,420
Mm...
476
00:20:36,620 --> 00:20:38,410
OK, loose lips, time to go home!
477
00:20:38,460 --> 00:20:39,810
No!
478
00:20:41,740 --> 00:20:44,850
What have I done? I think
she's in love with me.
479
00:20:44,900 --> 00:20:47,020
Yeah, no, I think you're
off the hook, Kev.
480
00:20:51,060 --> 00:20:53,810
Oh, wow... OK.
481
00:20:53,860 --> 00:20:56,650
Right, she's completely nuts, I
think we should just leave her.
482
00:20:56,700 --> 00:20:58,170
But we can't!
483
00:20:58,220 --> 00:20:59,970
No mum left behind!
484
00:21:00,020 --> 00:21:02,170
Kev, please...
485
00:21:02,220 --> 00:21:04,860
Fine, you get her, I'll call a cab, yeah?
486
00:21:10,220 --> 00:21:11,500
Where is she?
487
00:21:12,860 --> 00:21:14,530
Oh! Hey, hey!
488
00:21:14,580 --> 00:21:18,690
Have you seen our friend, the
lady that we came in with?
489
00:21:18,740 --> 00:21:20,420
Pft.. she's over there.
490
00:21:23,220 --> 00:21:25,570
Oh, dear...
491
00:21:25,620 --> 00:21:29,010
- Right... name?
- JR Hartley.
492
00:21:29,060 --> 00:21:31,610
- Postcode?
- NE1...
493
00:21:31,660 --> 00:21:33,890
.. 4... A... BJ.
494
00:21:33,940 --> 00:21:36,730
Yeah, no, sorry. I'm so
sorry, officer, she's with us.
495
00:21:36,780 --> 00:21:39,770
- Look, this woman just needs
to go home. - Absolutely.
496
00:21:39,820 --> 00:21:42,050
- She was urinating in the street.
- Jesus!
497
00:21:42,100 --> 00:21:44,330
Many apologies, she doesn't get out much.
498
00:21:44,380 --> 00:21:46,730
Well, that's funny, cos we
booked her here on Saturday.
499
00:21:46,780 --> 00:21:49,810
Oh, I think that's our
Uber! Er... DYC... DYC!
500
00:21:49,860 --> 00:21:52,410
Hi, hi! Are you here for Julia?
501
00:21:52,460 --> 00:21:54,330
- Yeah.
- Yes! Kevin, quick, get her in!
502
00:21:54,380 --> 00:21:57,180
- We're going to Wimbourne
Street via Almond Road. - Sure.
503
00:22:00,260 --> 00:22:02,010
Oh, my God, Kevin! Go and get her!
504
00:22:02,060 --> 00:22:04,260
Kevin, go and get her!
505
00:22:09,580 --> 00:22:11,790
Get down here right now!
506
00:22:12,340 --> 00:22:14,130
Please...!
507
00:22:14,180 --> 00:22:15,810
Get down!
508
00:22:15,860 --> 00:22:18,170
Right, I'm going to count to three!
509
00:22:18,220 --> 00:22:20,970
One, two...
510
00:22:21,020 --> 00:22:23,770
.. two and a half... three.
511
00:22:23,820 --> 00:22:25,610
Right, right, that's it!
512
00:22:25,660 --> 00:22:27,890
I'm counting to five!
513
00:22:27,940 --> 00:22:29,930
- One, two...
- Oi!
514
00:22:29,980 --> 00:22:31,530
Kevin, can't we just leave her?
515
00:22:31,580 --> 00:22:33,490
I really hate this, and I want to go.
516
00:22:33,540 --> 00:22:35,450
Julia, no mum left behind!
517
00:22:35,500 --> 00:22:37,930
I don't care, Kevin, I want to go home!
518
00:22:37,980 --> 00:22:39,730
Well, what if she gets
killed or something?
519
00:22:39,780 --> 00:22:41,050
I don't want blood on my hands!
520
00:22:41,100 --> 00:22:43,290
Oh, for fuck's sake!
521
00:22:43,340 --> 00:22:44,810
Call Liz!
522
00:22:44,860 --> 00:22:46,220
Please! Ah...
523
00:22:48,100 --> 00:22:51,850
- Beep!
- Oi, oi, oi...
524
00:22:51,900 --> 00:22:53,730
Cheer up, love, might never happen!
525
00:23:05,180 --> 00:23:08,330
I'm sorry, ladies and gentlemen, but
until the woman who just flashed me
526
00:23:08,380 --> 00:23:10,280
gets off, this bus ain't going anywhere.
527
00:23:13,620 --> 00:23:17,290
Julia, Kev! There's a
party on the bus now!
528
00:23:17,340 --> 00:23:19,210
Wait here for a minute, yeah?
529
00:23:19,260 --> 00:23:22,090
- All right, where is she?
- I'm king of the world!
530
00:23:22,140 --> 00:23:24,290
Oggy, oggy, oggy... oi!
531
00:23:24,340 --> 00:23:26,100
Oggy, oggy, oggy...
532
00:23:27,700 --> 00:23:31,410
Oi! Who's coming up to join me!
533
00:23:31,460 --> 00:23:33,130
Oi, Meg!
534
00:23:33,180 --> 00:23:34,890
I've got some tequila!
535
00:23:38,020 --> 00:23:40,020
Ooh...
536
00:23:46,060 --> 00:23:48,020
Tequila!
537
00:23:49,980 --> 00:23:52,330
Agh, get me booze!
538
00:23:52,380 --> 00:23:53,410
Shhh!
539
00:23:53,460 --> 00:23:56,290
- Right, Meg, you're home now.
- I want booze!
540
00:23:56,340 --> 00:23:57,780
Shhh, Meg!
541
00:24:00,420 --> 00:24:02,810
Shut her in here, Kev, so
she doesn't wake the kids.
542
00:24:02,860 --> 00:24:05,730
I want booze! I want booze!
543
00:24:05,780 --> 00:24:07,650
I... oh... Wait a minute!
544
00:24:07,700 --> 00:24:10,330
I want champagne!
545
00:24:10,380 --> 00:24:12,010
Alexa!
546
00:24:12,060 --> 00:24:14,210
Play my New Year's playlist!
547
00:24:17,220 --> 00:24:18,650
Da-da-dum-dum!
548
00:24:18,700 --> 00:24:21,490
Shit, shit! How do you turn...
Where... where's the thing?
549
00:24:22,940 --> 00:24:25,370
Alexa, turn the music off!
550
00:24:25,420 --> 00:24:29,290
- Right, I'm sorting this.
- I need to take my coat off.
551
00:24:29,340 --> 00:24:32,890
Alexa, play some happy hardcore!
552
00:24:35,020 --> 00:24:37,130
Alexa... don't!
553
00:24:37,180 --> 00:24:38,850
Woo!
554
00:24:38,900 --> 00:24:41,570
Alexa... the children are in bed!
555
00:24:47,860 --> 00:24:49,850
She's a loon, she is a monster.
556
00:24:49,900 --> 00:24:52,370
- She is a monster!
- I told you.
557
00:24:52,420 --> 00:24:54,530
What are you making there?
558
00:24:54,580 --> 00:24:56,530
George's Marvellous Medicine.
559
00:24:56,580 --> 00:24:59,690
Berocca, with a splash of
various knockout juices.
560
00:24:59,740 --> 00:25:01,930
- What, you're going to drug her?
- Yeah.
561
00:25:01,980 --> 00:25:04,090
- OK, cool.
- Wait...
562
00:25:04,140 --> 00:25:05,660
.. who's watching Meg?
563
00:25:11,060 --> 00:25:13,810
It's really stuffy in here, Kev.
564
00:25:13,860 --> 00:25:16,130
Please, Kev? Come on, Kev!
565
00:25:16,180 --> 00:25:17,930
Just a little finger!
566
00:25:17,980 --> 00:25:21,250
Kev, just a little finger of air!
567
00:25:21,300 --> 00:25:23,290
OK, OK, just...
568
00:25:23,340 --> 00:25:24,860
.. just a smidgen!
569
00:25:26,260 --> 00:25:28,210
Fuck you!
570
00:25:28,260 --> 00:25:30,890
- Stop her, Kev!
- I've got to be up in two hours!
571
00:25:30,940 --> 00:25:33,130
- Oh, Kevin!
- Argh!
572
00:25:33,180 --> 00:25:34,700
Lock the front door!
573
00:25:36,140 --> 00:25:37,660
Come on, Meg!
574
00:25:47,940 --> 00:25:49,930
- Right, then, I'm off home.
- OK.
575
00:25:49,980 --> 00:25:51,580
< Taxi!
576
00:25:54,020 --> 00:25:56,090
Oh, my God!
577
00:25:56,140 --> 00:25:57,850
Look what the cat dragged to school!
578
00:25:57,900 --> 00:26:00,490
- What happened to you lot last night?
- I don't want to talk about it.
579
00:26:00,540 --> 00:26:03,940
Out with Meg. That is not
going to be a pretty sight.
580
00:26:06,900 --> 00:26:09,050
- It lives!
- Top of the morning!
581
00:26:09,100 --> 00:26:11,130
- What? - What a great
night last night, eh?
582
00:26:11,180 --> 00:26:14,370
- We've got to do it again sometime.
Thursday? - No! Thank you.
583
00:26:14,420 --> 00:26:15,850
No, thank you.
584
00:26:15,900 --> 00:26:18,250
So, I'm really tired, you
must be hanging in rags?
585
00:26:18,300 --> 00:26:20,610
No, I feel fine! Right, mwah.
586
00:26:20,660 --> 00:26:22,850
- See you later, got to scoot.
- Wait, wait, wait!
587
00:26:22,900 --> 00:26:25,530
Sorry, can I just ask you how
you... Sorry, what is all this?
588
00:26:25,580 --> 00:26:28,330
You were mental last night,
you tried to hijack a bus,
589
00:26:28,380 --> 00:26:30,450
you got off with Kevin.
590
00:26:30,500 --> 00:26:32,210
Yeah, it was a fun night, all right.
591
00:26:32,260 --> 00:26:34,810
- I mean, we had to look
after you, though. - Cheers!
592
00:26:34,860 --> 00:26:36,850
- No mum left behind, I'd do
the same for you. - But...
593
00:26:36,900 --> 00:26:40,410
But you almost got arrested, I
don't understand how you even...
594
00:26:40,460 --> 00:26:42,250
Sorry. How you...
595
00:26:42,300 --> 00:26:43,770
.. do what you do and then do that?
596
00:26:43,820 --> 00:26:46,370
- I mean, you were pissing
in the street. - Look...
597
00:26:46,420 --> 00:26:48,130
It's how I let off steam.
598
00:26:48,180 --> 00:26:50,410
I love my kids, I love my job.
599
00:26:50,460 --> 00:26:52,010
I love my life!
600
00:26:52,060 --> 00:26:55,730
But, in order to survive, I've got
to blow it up every now and again.
601
00:26:55,780 --> 00:26:59,050
It's like... when a
snake eats a rat, Julia.
602
00:26:59,100 --> 00:27:01,050
It's not pleasant, it's not nice...
603
00:27:01,100 --> 00:27:04,370
.. but we have to do it. For survival.
604
00:27:04,420 --> 00:27:06,010
See you at pick-up.
605
00:27:06,060 --> 00:27:09,220
At least have a hangover,
a glimmer of remorse?
606
00:27:10,620 --> 00:27:12,500
Where's your secret sadness?!
607
00:27:15,300 --> 00:27:16,570
So...
608
00:27:16,620 --> 00:27:19,090
- .. what's the verdict, Julia?
- Yeah, it's definitely doable.
609
00:27:19,140 --> 00:27:21,250
I mean, I'd have to
reorganise things quite a lot.
610
00:27:21,300 --> 00:27:23,610
I'd definitely have to re-colour
code my calendar and...
611
00:27:23,660 --> 00:27:26,090
That's great! Well, we
shall let Felicity know.
612
00:27:26,140 --> 00:27:29,370
I'd have to have a bit of a
rethink about my whole character!
613
00:27:29,420 --> 00:27:32,650
I think I'd have to become much
more sort of work hard, play hard.
614
00:27:32,700 --> 00:27:35,410
Whereas, at the moment, I'm
very much sort of work hard...
615
00:27:35,460 --> 00:27:37,570
.. watch Poldark hard.
616
00:27:37,620 --> 00:27:39,610
Sorry, Julia, is that a yes?
617
00:27:39,660 --> 00:27:41,410
I saw a woman fall off a bus
618
00:27:41,460 --> 00:27:44,460
and then try to order
cocaine from Deliveroo.
619
00:27:46,620 --> 00:27:49,540
Probably cos she once said
yes to an offer like this.
620
00:27:53,220 --> 00:27:55,770
I actually think I'm just going
to stick with what I've got.
621
00:27:55,820 --> 00:27:58,250
You can't just stick with
what you've got, Julia.
622
00:27:58,300 --> 00:27:59,940
That's not what's on the table.
623
00:28:01,980 --> 00:28:06,380
You'd better tell old Martin
to dust off the Listerine.
624
00:28:07,500 --> 00:28:09,410
Are you sure this is what you want?
625
00:28:09,460 --> 00:28:13,380
I've never been more sure of
anything in my life, actually.
626
00:28:24,100 --> 00:28:25,460
Good luck, Martin.
46348
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