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1
00:00:00,890 --> 00:00:04,090
I'm very pleased
to kick off this year's
2
00:00:03,974 --> 00:00:06,241
"bring your daughter
to work day."
3
00:00:06,169 --> 00:00:08,835
I think it's wonderful
to celebrate the bond
4
00:00:08,743 --> 00:00:11,343
which is shared
between parent and child.
5
00:00:11,255 --> 00:00:12,988
Where's your daughter today,
sir?
6
00:00:12,940 --> 00:00:14,474
Uh...
7
00:00:14,435 --> 00:00:16,968
Amsterdam?! What the hell
is she doing there?
8
00:00:16,883 --> 00:00:18,850
Sir, it's Amsterdam.
9
00:00:18,791 --> 00:00:20,591
She's probably...
10
00:00:20,539 --> 00:00:22,273
At a museum.
11
00:00:22,225 --> 00:00:25,524
We feel today is an opportunity
to inspire young women.
12
00:00:25,404 --> 00:00:26,972
It's also a great chance
13
00:00:26,931 --> 00:00:29,297
for them to see where
their fathers go every day.
14
00:00:29,219 --> 00:00:30,687
Couldn't their mothers
bring them?
15
00:00:30,651 --> 00:00:33,451
I don't care how they get there.
The important thing
16
00:00:33,353 --> 00:00:36,220
is for them to see how their
daddies bring home the bacon.
17
00:01:00,825 --> 00:01:02,192
Well...
18
00:01:02,161 --> 00:01:04,894
My lifelong dream
has been realized.
19
00:01:04,800 --> 00:01:06,366
What happened?
20
00:01:06,325 --> 00:01:10,260
Someone hire you to write porn?
21
00:01:10,109 --> 00:01:13,876
Yes.
22
00:01:13,735 --> 00:01:16,067
Face five productions
23
00:01:15,992 --> 00:01:17,992
has commissioned me
to write a script...
24
00:01:17,931 --> 00:01:20,131
you know, the way
the crowned heads of Europe
25
00:01:20,062 --> 00:01:22,162
used to commission Mozart
to write operas.
26
00:01:22,097 --> 00:01:24,197
Yes, it's the exact same thing.
27
00:01:24,132 --> 00:01:26,531
After years of rejection,
28
00:01:26,452 --> 00:01:29,920
my words will finally be coming
out of naked people's mouths.
29
00:01:29,792 --> 00:01:32,158
Just do not involve me.
30
00:01:32,080 --> 00:01:34,548
First I need a title.
31
00:01:34,466 --> 00:01:36,999
How about
"the French erection"?
32
00:01:39,171 --> 00:01:42,305
Did you hear that channel 7
just said that my comments about
33
00:01:42,192 --> 00:01:44,292
the "bring your daughter
to work" day
34
00:01:44,227 --> 00:01:46,194
showed that I had
a '50s mentality.
35
00:01:46,135 --> 00:01:48,035
That's poppycock.
36
00:01:47,979 --> 00:01:49,879
They're just a bunch
of communists, sir.
37
00:01:49,823 --> 00:01:52,489
Really? I'll have
to update my list.
38
00:01:52,399 --> 00:01:55,566
A representative from
the woman's action committee
39
00:01:55,451 --> 00:01:57,451
is here to talk about
your press conference.
40
00:01:57,390 --> 00:01:58,657
I can't right now.
41
00:01:58,631 --> 00:02:00,564
I have a meeting
with Daniel Bryant.
42
00:02:00,507 --> 00:02:01,940
Oh, Daniel...
43
00:02:01,905 --> 00:02:04,072
he's donating some
waterfront property to the city.
44
00:02:04,005 --> 00:02:05,338
Charlie?
45
00:02:05,309 --> 00:02:09,441
Angry feminist,
rich guy giving away land.
46
00:02:09,282 --> 00:02:10,950
That was easy.
47
00:02:14,179 --> 00:02:17,379
I am so sorry about the mayor's
comments this morning.
48
00:02:17,263 --> 00:02:19,564
Trust me... he's very concerned
about women's issues.
49
00:02:19,489 --> 00:02:21,122
Where is the mayor now?
50
00:02:21,078 --> 00:02:23,646
He's in a meeting with
a real-estate developer.
51
00:02:23,590 --> 00:02:26,158
Typical! He sends in the little
woman to take care of me.
52
00:02:26,071 --> 00:02:27,871
City hall has always been
a boys' club.
53
00:02:27,819 --> 00:02:28,953
That's not true.
54
00:02:28,932 --> 00:02:31,732
Sorry to interrupt, gals.
55
00:02:31,635 --> 00:02:34,468
The mayor and I really wanted
to take part in this meeting,
56
00:02:34,370 --> 00:02:36,004
but something urgent came up.
57
00:02:35,959 --> 00:02:38,426
Don't forget
the cigars, Charlie!
58
00:02:47,532 --> 00:02:49,933
Stuart, let me ask you
something.
59
00:02:49,854 --> 00:02:52,754
How much money do you get paid
for writing a porno?
60
00:02:52,653 --> 00:02:55,285
Paul, this isn't about money.
61
00:02:55,196 --> 00:02:58,863
It's about creating something
that I can be proud of.
62
00:02:58,726 --> 00:03:01,459
When people think
quality erotica,
63
00:03:01,364 --> 00:03:04,130
I want them to think of
jet runyon.
64
00:03:04,035 --> 00:03:05,768
Who's jet runyon?
65
00:03:05,720 --> 00:03:07,820
I'm not dumb enough
to use my real name.
66
00:03:07,755 --> 00:03:09,188
Charlie, I'm in a bind.
67
00:03:09,155 --> 00:03:12,088
I've been gunning for my club's
golf trophy for nine years,
68
00:03:11,984 --> 00:03:14,384
but this year's tournament
is father and son.
69
00:03:14,305 --> 00:03:16,238
How would you
like to be my son?
70
00:03:16,181 --> 00:03:19,515
According to my dad,
I'm no son of his.
71
00:03:20,697 --> 00:03:22,263
Sorry, I don't play golf.
72
00:03:22,223 --> 00:03:24,056
I do.
I love golf.
73
00:03:24,003 --> 00:03:25,936
What about you, Stuart?
74
00:03:25,879 --> 00:03:28,179
I've gotta finish some work,
75
00:03:28,105 --> 00:03:31,471
so I have time
to write an adult film.
76
00:03:31,348 --> 00:03:32,715
Got ya!
77
00:03:33,701 --> 00:03:36,801
In fact, I live for golf.
78
00:03:36,690 --> 00:03:39,023
What about you, Carter?
79
00:03:38,946 --> 00:03:41,980
Sir, I don't think people
are gonna believe I'm your son.
80
00:03:41,872 --> 00:03:44,972
Couldn't you just pretend to be
straight for one afternoon?
81
00:03:44,861 --> 00:03:47,361
Lovin' golf over here.
82
00:03:47,278 --> 00:03:50,811
Sir, why don't you take Paul?
83
00:03:50,680 --> 00:03:52,314
I think he might like golf.
84
00:03:52,269 --> 00:03:53,469
He does?
85
00:03:53,446 --> 00:03:54,913
What's your handicap?
86
00:03:54,877 --> 00:03:57,210
He's Paul.
87
00:04:01,499 --> 00:04:03,933
Caitlin, we ordered you lunch.
88
00:04:03,852 --> 00:04:05,886
You chose a restaurant
without consulting me?
89
00:04:05,824 --> 00:04:07,423
I ran into Carter
in the men's room.
90
00:04:07,382 --> 00:04:08,916
He said, "let's order lunch."
91
00:04:08,877 --> 00:04:12,077
That's where decisions are being
made... in the men's room?
92
00:04:11,961 --> 00:04:15,993
Yeah. We drafted a new
anticrime bill in stall 3.
93
00:04:17,111 --> 00:04:19,144
Caitlin, we ordered you
a Cobb salad.
94
00:04:19,083 --> 00:04:21,550
So now you can read
my weak, female mind?
95
00:04:21,468 --> 00:04:22,868
You always order a Cobb salad.
96
00:04:22,835 --> 00:04:24,935
Whose side are you on?!
97
00:04:28,940 --> 00:04:32,674
What other decisions have been
made that I should know about?
98
00:04:32,533 --> 00:04:34,500
We decided to build
basketball courts
99
00:04:34,441 --> 00:04:36,341
on the land
Bryant gave to the city.
100
00:04:36,284 --> 00:04:38,017
You should have waited
to hear my idea.
101
00:04:37,970 --> 00:04:40,803
Okay, what's your idea?
102
00:04:40,704 --> 00:04:42,371
We should build...
103
00:04:42,326 --> 00:04:45,292
An interactive center
for the arts.
104
00:04:45,188 --> 00:04:48,088
Interactive center
for the arts... what's that?
105
00:04:47,986 --> 00:04:50,886
What's basketball?
106
00:04:50,783 --> 00:04:53,183
I think you're getting
a little worked up over this.
107
00:04:53,104 --> 00:04:55,605
Watch out...
the woman's getting emotional.
108
00:04:55,521 --> 00:04:57,388
Are you afraid
I'm gonna freak out?!
109
00:04:57,334 --> 00:05:00,034
No, I think we're past that.
110
00:04:59,941 --> 00:05:02,108
Tell you what...
you make your proposal,
111
00:05:02,039 --> 00:05:04,572
and I'll make mine,
and we'll let Bryant choose.
112
00:05:04,487 --> 00:05:05,788
Fine.
113
00:05:05,759 --> 00:05:07,260
Hello!
114
00:05:07,223 --> 00:05:11,023
Caitlin, thanks for taking that
meeting with Karen this morning.
115
00:05:11,992 --> 00:05:13,558
Oh, I like that top.
116
00:05:13,518 --> 00:05:15,084
You look cute today.
117
00:05:15,044 --> 00:05:17,178
Sir, I find that offensive.
118
00:05:17,111 --> 00:05:20,411
I mean, I never hear you say
Charlie looks cute.
119
00:05:20,291 --> 00:05:23,157
You're absolutely right.
I apologize.
120
00:05:23,057 --> 00:05:25,823
Charlie, you look cute.
121
00:05:25,727 --> 00:05:28,527
Thank you, sir.
122
00:05:28,429 --> 00:05:33,363
You look pretty cute yourself.
123
00:05:33,167 --> 00:05:35,834
No sale, Crawford.
I don't ride that bike.
124
00:05:50,306 --> 00:05:52,806
Way to go, son.
I'm really proud of you.
125
00:05:52,723 --> 00:05:54,823
Let's see what
those Winston boys can do.
126
00:05:54,757 --> 00:05:57,757
Watch me closely, Paul.
You'll learn a thing or two.
127
00:05:57,651 --> 00:06:01,084
The world's finest private
instructors have taught me
128
00:06:00,958 --> 00:06:04,924
not to overthink my swing...
129
00:06:04,773 --> 00:06:07,173
Bend my knees...
130
00:06:07,094 --> 00:06:09,794
Tilt my head 15 degrees...
131
00:06:10,910 --> 00:06:13,111
don't overswing.
132
00:06:13,040 --> 00:06:14,439
Ahh!
133
00:06:17,428 --> 00:06:19,294
Come on, Winston!
What are you doing?!
134
00:06:19,240 --> 00:06:22,441
I hate you! I hate you!
135
00:06:24,932 --> 00:06:28,166
You're up, Paul.
Try not to embarrass us.
136
00:06:28,048 --> 00:06:30,481
I'll do my best.
137
00:06:32,403 --> 00:06:35,137
It's gonna be a long day
for you, Winston.
138
00:06:41,975 --> 00:06:44,008
Holy cow!
139
00:06:45,377 --> 00:06:48,410
That's my boy.
140
00:06:48,303 --> 00:06:51,969
"Oh, yeah.
141
00:06:51,831 --> 00:06:55,931
That's it...Baby."
142
00:06:57,714 --> 00:06:59,180
Damn!
143
00:06:59,144 --> 00:07:01,110
Carter, you're smart.
Help me out here.
144
00:07:01,052 --> 00:07:02,285
Oh, no, no.
145
00:07:02,261 --> 00:07:04,227
I'm not helping you
write that filth.
146
00:07:04,169 --> 00:07:05,302
Fine.
147
00:07:05,281 --> 00:07:06,647
"Yes.
148
00:07:06,616 --> 00:07:09,283
Give it to me."
149
00:07:09,192 --> 00:07:12,026
That's not right!
150
00:07:11,926 --> 00:07:14,392
How about,
"let me give it to you"?
151
00:07:19,526 --> 00:07:21,092
That's brilliant.
152
00:07:21,051 --> 00:07:23,118
Really?
153
00:07:23,054 --> 00:07:25,088
Read the whole thing
and tell me what you think.
154
00:07:25,026 --> 00:07:26,659
I don't know if I have time.
155
00:07:26,615 --> 00:07:27,982
It'll take 10 minutes...
156
00:07:27,952 --> 00:07:29,918
they only allow me 2 lines
of dialogue per page.
157
00:07:29,859 --> 00:07:32,259
On one condition.
Anything.
158
00:07:32,181 --> 00:07:34,747
Give me
one of those fake names.
159
00:07:34,660 --> 00:07:37,694
Lance buckskin.
160
00:07:37,586 --> 00:07:40,986
Oooh! I'm in.
161
00:07:40,862 --> 00:07:42,561
Paul, you were fantastic...
162
00:07:42,515 --> 00:07:45,481
the way you drove the ball,
the way you putted,
163
00:07:45,376 --> 00:07:47,609
they way you retrieved
my 7-iron.
164
00:07:47,539 --> 00:07:49,138
It was a short swim, sir.
165
00:07:49,096 --> 00:07:52,528
It was great having you
as my "son."
166
00:07:52,403 --> 00:07:54,403
It was great fun
having you as my "dad."
167
00:07:54,342 --> 00:07:55,476
You know...
168
00:07:55,455 --> 00:07:57,455
that's a beautiful trophy.
169
00:07:57,394 --> 00:07:59,928
Ah-ah.
Paul was talking.
170
00:07:59,844 --> 00:08:00,910
What were you saying?
171
00:08:00,893 --> 00:08:02,592
Well...
172
00:08:02,546 --> 00:08:05,346
I remember
I was saying something
173
00:08:05,248 --> 00:08:07,781
and then I lost
my concentration.
174
00:08:07,696 --> 00:08:10,930
Now my mind
is a complete blank.
175
00:08:10,812 --> 00:08:13,012
Chip off the old block.
176
00:08:17,235 --> 00:08:20,036
Hey, if you were building
an art center,
177
00:08:19,938 --> 00:08:22,037
would you put in
a sculpture courtyard?
178
00:08:21,973 --> 00:08:24,507
Yeah. I think so.
Thanks.
179
00:08:24,421 --> 00:08:27,721
If you were jumping into
a hot tub with four other women,
180
00:08:27,602 --> 00:08:30,401
would you take your top off
before you got in?
181
00:08:33,356 --> 00:08:36,324
Yeah, I think so.
182
00:08:36,217 --> 00:08:38,651
Thanks.
183
00:08:39,761 --> 00:08:44,061
So the chief says,
"death by unga-bunga."
184
00:08:48,760 --> 00:08:50,093
You get it?
185
00:08:50,063 --> 00:08:51,430
Yeah.
186
00:08:51,399 --> 00:08:52,700
How often?
187
00:08:55,342 --> 00:08:56,975
Caitlin, this is Daniel Bryant.
188
00:08:56,931 --> 00:08:58,098
Nice to meet you.
189
00:08:58,076 --> 00:09:00,043
I'm looking forward
to our meeting tomorrow.
190
00:08:59,984 --> 00:09:01,951
No need...
Charlie's already told me
191
00:09:01,891 --> 00:09:04,058
about his plans
for the basketball courts.
192
00:09:03,991 --> 00:09:05,523
I think it's fantastic.
193
00:09:05,485 --> 00:09:07,552
I've got a few more questions
for you.
194
00:09:07,488 --> 00:09:09,822
Why don't you follow me
into the men's room?
195
00:09:09,746 --> 00:09:11,813
No sale.
I don't ride that bike.
196
00:09:17,377 --> 00:09:19,543
Boy, did I just get screwed.
197
00:09:19,474 --> 00:09:20,608
Ooh!
198
00:09:20,588 --> 00:09:22,222
I can use that.
199
00:09:25,000 --> 00:09:26,501
Charlie, we need to talk.
200
00:09:26,463 --> 00:09:28,430
You know I admire you
professionally.
201
00:09:28,371 --> 00:09:29,971
You know I respect you...
202
00:09:29,929 --> 00:09:31,430
morning, Caitlin.
203
00:09:31,392 --> 00:09:33,725
You suck!
204
00:09:33,649 --> 00:09:35,749
I know Cindy's your friend,
205
00:09:35,685 --> 00:09:37,952
but we had a couple of drinks.
206
00:09:37,879 --> 00:09:39,979
One thing led to another...
207
00:09:39,913 --> 00:09:41,114
what?
208
00:09:41,090 --> 00:09:42,756
Nothing.
209
00:09:42,712 --> 00:09:46,478
I can't believe you went
behind my back last night.
210
00:09:46,336 --> 00:09:47,969
I ran into Bryant
on the way out.
211
00:09:47,926 --> 00:09:49,892
He asked me to go
to the Knicks game.
212
00:09:49,834 --> 00:09:52,234
It I a boys' club...
you go to a basketball game,
213
00:09:52,155 --> 00:09:54,321
have a few beers,
high-five when they score.
214
00:09:54,254 --> 00:09:55,720
It's not like that.
215
00:09:55,684 --> 00:09:57,318
Only idiots high-five.
216
00:09:58,481 --> 00:10:02,015
I raise the roof
and point to God.
217
00:10:01,885 --> 00:10:04,251
I work my butt off
putting together a proposal,
218
00:10:04,173 --> 00:10:06,640
and your idea slides through
because you're a man.
219
00:10:06,559 --> 00:10:09,258
Don't act like there aren't
advantages to being a woman.
220
00:10:09,166 --> 00:10:11,800
When's the last time a cop
gave you a speeding ticket?
221
00:10:11,709 --> 00:10:14,776
They don't give tickets,
they give warnings.
222
00:10:16,605 --> 00:10:20,605
Then you have a follow-up dinner
to discuss traffic safety.
223
00:10:20,453 --> 00:10:22,419
Bryant liked my proposal
for one reason...
224
00:10:22,361 --> 00:10:23,761
it's a great idea.
225
00:10:23,729 --> 00:10:26,062
He liked it because
he didn't hear my idea.
226
00:10:25,987 --> 00:10:29,386
I'm going out with him tonight.
You're welcome to tag along.
227
00:10:29,260 --> 00:10:31,461
Fine!
I'll beat you at your own game.
228
00:10:31,391 --> 00:10:33,157
You can't handle my game.
229
00:10:33,108 --> 00:10:35,475
You wanna get tough?
230
00:10:35,398 --> 00:10:38,131
You wanna play hardware?
231
00:10:39,562 --> 00:10:42,196
It's the bottom
of the fourth quarter,
232
00:10:42,107 --> 00:10:44,639
you've got two strikes
and no balls.
233
00:10:44,555 --> 00:10:47,022
I think you've got
your metaphors
234
00:10:46,940 --> 00:10:48,507
a little mixed up.
235
00:10:48,466 --> 00:10:50,166
Not the last part.
236
00:10:58,735 --> 00:11:00,403
What'd you guys do last night?
237
00:11:00,357 --> 00:11:02,824
Did you go to the ballgame
with the mayor
238
00:11:02,743 --> 00:11:04,876
and then ride in his limo
to a fancy restaurant?
239
00:11:04,809 --> 00:11:06,043
I guess not.
240
00:11:06,017 --> 00:11:08,216
'Cause that's what I did,
241
00:11:08,147 --> 00:11:10,514
and I didn't see you there!
242
00:11:10,437 --> 00:11:13,170
Paulie, you wanna hit a bucket
of balls this afternoon?
243
00:11:13,076 --> 00:11:14,610
I'd love to.
I can't.
244
00:11:14,571 --> 00:11:16,437
I gotta prepare
for my weekly press briefing.
245
00:11:16,383 --> 00:11:17,849
That's too bad.
246
00:11:17,813 --> 00:11:20,713
Well, um, maybe
I'll come watch you work.
247
00:11:20,612 --> 00:11:23,112
You never come
to my press briefings.
248
00:11:23,028 --> 00:11:24,762
Well, I do now.
249
00:11:24,713 --> 00:11:26,780
I'll see you there.
250
00:11:26,716 --> 00:11:29,849
Wow! The mayor's coming
to my press conference.
251
00:11:29,737 --> 00:11:31,470
Ooh!
I gotta go Polish the podium.
252
00:11:35,905 --> 00:11:39,072
This thing writes itself.
253
00:11:41,724 --> 00:11:43,158
I'm so nervous...
254
00:11:43,123 --> 00:11:45,257
I have to outschmooze Charlie
tonight.
255
00:11:45,189 --> 00:11:48,123
Let me give you a little advice
for hanging out with the boys.
256
00:11:48,020 --> 00:11:49,386
First...
257
00:11:49,355 --> 00:11:51,789
When the conversation
turns to sports,
258
00:11:51,708 --> 00:11:53,341
all you have to say is,
259
00:11:53,298 --> 00:11:56,264
"the athletic ability
on that guy is amazing."
260
00:11:56,160 --> 00:11:57,893
What if the athlete is a woman?
261
00:11:57,844 --> 00:12:01,178
Then you would just say,
"I bet she's wild in the sack."
262
00:12:02,614 --> 00:12:04,148
Next...
263
00:12:04,109 --> 00:12:07,475
When drinking, always
call attention to yourself.
264
00:12:07,352 --> 00:12:11,452
"Man, I am buzzin'!"
265
00:12:12,598 --> 00:12:14,864
To show your love for
the liquor, describe it.
266
00:12:14,791 --> 00:12:16,259
"Whoa!
267
00:12:16,223 --> 00:12:18,557
"Stuff is tasty!
268
00:12:18,481 --> 00:12:20,713
Stuff is cold!"
269
00:12:20,642 --> 00:12:25,608
Finally... always, always lie
about how many you've had.
270
00:12:25,412 --> 00:12:27,412
"Dude, what beer you on?
271
00:12:27,351 --> 00:12:31,451
Three? I've had eight.
Take off the skirt, Alice!"
272
00:12:31,294 --> 00:12:34,060
Do people really buy that?
273
00:12:33,964 --> 00:12:35,265
Sure.
274
00:12:35,237 --> 00:12:36,903
"I am drunk.
275
00:12:36,858 --> 00:12:38,659
"I am wasted.
276
00:12:38,607 --> 00:12:41,674
I am completely hammered."
277
00:12:41,564 --> 00:12:43,731
Carter, we all have
a few belts at lunch,
278
00:12:43,662 --> 00:12:45,163
but try to keep it cool, huh?
279
00:12:47,287 --> 00:12:49,821
Boy, do I feel like an ass.
280
00:12:54,250 --> 00:12:57,284
Thank you.
281
00:13:02,000 --> 00:13:03,334
So he bends over and says,
282
00:13:03,304 --> 00:13:05,171
"I don't know, lady,
you tell me."
283
00:13:07,723 --> 00:13:12,057
You know, if there's one thing
I love with a good steak,
284
00:13:11,889 --> 00:13:13,390
it's a fine cigar.
285
00:13:13,352 --> 00:13:14,751
Now you're talking.
286
00:13:14,719 --> 00:13:17,552
You know what I love
with a good steak?
287
00:13:17,453 --> 00:13:21,121
Strawberry lip gloss.
288
00:13:20,983 --> 00:13:23,783
What the hell!
I'll try anything once. Charlie?
289
00:13:29,377 --> 00:13:31,577
Beef time.
290
00:13:31,507 --> 00:13:34,274
I'll have the 16-ounce
porterhouse, rare.
291
00:13:34,178 --> 00:13:39,145
I'll have the 32-ounce
porterhouse, very rare.
292
00:13:38,948 --> 00:13:41,082
Just run it out to the table,
give me a shotgun,
293
00:13:41,015 --> 00:13:42,414
and pass the a.1.
294
00:13:43,622 --> 00:13:46,555
Dinner salad,
light dressing on the side.
295
00:13:46,452 --> 00:13:47,585
My usual.
296
00:13:47,564 --> 00:13:49,930
Did you see sportscenter
last night?
297
00:13:49,853 --> 00:13:52,353
How about that Shannon sharpe,
huh?
298
00:13:52,270 --> 00:13:55,270
I bet she is wild in the sack.
299
00:13:55,164 --> 00:13:56,964
Shannon sharpe is a guy.
300
00:13:56,912 --> 00:13:58,146
Really?
301
00:13:58,121 --> 00:13:59,954
Since when?
302
00:13:59,902 --> 00:14:01,401
Anyways...
303
00:14:01,364 --> 00:14:03,664
Daniel, about my
basketball-courts proposal...
304
00:14:03,589 --> 00:14:05,189
I can talk hoops all night.
305
00:14:05,147 --> 00:14:08,347
What do you think about
the Knicks this year?
306
00:14:08,232 --> 00:14:10,532
Man, I am buzzing.
307
00:14:16,753 --> 00:14:18,053
Ahhh!
308
00:14:18,025 --> 00:14:19,891
This stuff is tasty.
309
00:14:19,838 --> 00:14:21,838
Yeah! You know it!
310
00:14:26,387 --> 00:14:30,487
So, Dan,
you ever have jock itch?
311
00:14:31,475 --> 00:14:33,275
Let's talk about that.
312
00:14:33,224 --> 00:14:34,990
Dude, what beer are you on?
313
00:14:34,940 --> 00:14:36,806
Yeah, Charlie, what beer?
314
00:14:36,753 --> 00:14:39,020
One.
315
00:14:38,947 --> 00:14:40,647
I've had eight.
316
00:14:40,600 --> 00:14:42,633
I had...Nine.
317
00:14:43,398 --> 00:14:45,865
Take off the skirt, Alice.
318
00:14:52,397 --> 00:14:53,531
Ahhh!
319
00:14:53,510 --> 00:14:54,843
Eleven.
320
00:14:56,720 --> 00:14:58,853
So...
321
00:14:58,788 --> 00:15:02,888
What did you think
of the script?
322
00:15:02,730 --> 00:15:04,263
You hated it, didn't you?
323
00:15:04,224 --> 00:15:06,558
I just think it was
a little clich�d.
324
00:15:06,483 --> 00:15:08,516
It's not as easy as I thought.
325
00:15:08,453 --> 00:15:12,019
Everything winds up being
a horny pizza-delivery guy
326
00:15:11,887 --> 00:15:14,887
or a hot-tub party
gettin' out of control.
327
00:15:14,780 --> 00:15:17,347
All the clever stuff
has been done.
328
00:15:17,261 --> 00:15:19,560
It's just a couple of tweaks.
That's all.
329
00:15:19,486 --> 00:15:22,020
Like on page 2...
the busload of cheerleaders
330
00:15:21,935 --> 00:15:24,001
that breaks down
in front of the frat house.
331
00:15:23,939 --> 00:15:25,405
I'm lovin' it.
332
00:15:25,368 --> 00:15:28,869
That's actually a true story.
333
00:15:28,739 --> 00:15:30,506
Great, great, but, um...
334
00:15:30,456 --> 00:15:34,822
I would introduce the naughty
French tutor earlier, earlier.
335
00:15:34,653 --> 00:15:38,588
And here, on page 20...
the 2 girls playing tennis.
336
00:15:38,437 --> 00:15:41,737
Couldn't that be
4 girls playing tennis?
337
00:15:41,617 --> 00:15:45,251
How did I miss that?
338
00:15:45,114 --> 00:15:46,681
And...
339
00:15:46,641 --> 00:15:48,607
They're playing on Clay.
340
00:15:48,549 --> 00:15:51,282
So, I'm saying, maybe it rains.
341
00:15:51,187 --> 00:15:55,387
But if it rained the Clay would
turn to mu... ahhh!
342
00:15:55,226 --> 00:15:57,359
Oh, my God!
343
00:15:57,292 --> 00:16:00,059
You're a genius!
344
00:16:01,711 --> 00:16:04,711
Oh, Paul, I'm sorry
I missed your press conference,
345
00:16:04,605 --> 00:16:06,905
but there's 180 people
trapped in the Lincoln tunnel.
346
00:16:06,831 --> 00:16:09,131
I don't care.
347
00:16:09,056 --> 00:16:11,190
There'll be other
press conferences, Paul.
348
00:16:11,123 --> 00:16:13,923
I told all the reporters
you'd be coming.
349
00:16:13,826 --> 00:16:15,327
I'll make it up to you.
350
00:16:15,289 --> 00:16:18,156
I'll buy you that new microphone
you've always wanted.
351
00:16:18,055 --> 00:16:20,721
You think that's gonna
make it all better?
352
00:16:20,631 --> 00:16:22,964
I don't want
your stupid microphone.
353
00:16:22,888 --> 00:16:25,487
I said I was sorry.
354
00:16:25,400 --> 00:16:27,566
I had a crisis.
355
00:16:27,499 --> 00:16:29,198
There's always a crisis.
356
00:16:29,152 --> 00:16:30,919
Work always comes first.
357
00:16:30,870 --> 00:16:32,569
You watch your tone, mister.
358
00:16:32,523 --> 00:16:35,589
You just have to accept the fact
that I'm the boss.
359
00:16:35,480 --> 00:16:36,946
You're the employee.
360
00:16:36,910 --> 00:16:39,478
Well,
I never asked to be hired.
361
00:16:39,391 --> 00:16:42,191
Yes, you did.
You sent me your resume.
362
00:16:42,093 --> 00:16:45,626
Just stay out of my life!
363
00:16:45,494 --> 00:16:49,828
He'll come out
when he gets hungry.
364
00:16:54,000 --> 00:16:55,133
I gotta tell you,
365
00:16:55,113 --> 00:16:57,245
I'm impressed
with the way you do business.
366
00:16:57,178 --> 00:17:00,612
I was surprised that you
suggested that we come here.
367
00:17:00,487 --> 00:17:02,920
Are you kidding?
I love this place?
368
00:17:02,840 --> 00:17:06,039
Hey, sweetheart, looking good.
369
00:17:05,923 --> 00:17:07,923
Can I get four back?
370
00:17:07,863 --> 00:17:09,163
Thank you.
371
00:17:09,134 --> 00:17:10,600
Here you go, Dan.
372
00:17:10,565 --> 00:17:13,232
Two bottles
of chateau marmon champagne.
373
00:17:13,141 --> 00:17:16,041
My favorite... booze!
374
00:17:15,939 --> 00:17:17,039
Okay.
375
00:17:17,020 --> 00:17:19,553
Caitlin, watch it.
376
00:17:19,468 --> 00:17:20,569
Whoa!
377
00:17:20,550 --> 00:17:22,350
This stuff is bubbly!
378
00:17:22,298 --> 00:17:23,565
Bubbly...
379
00:17:23,538 --> 00:17:25,672
Is bubbly.
Is bubbly.
380
00:17:25,605 --> 00:17:29,205
I am kicking your butt,
and you practically live here.
381
00:17:29,071 --> 00:17:31,004
I don't come here that often.
382
00:17:30,947 --> 00:17:32,580
Hey, Charlie.
383
00:17:32,536 --> 00:17:35,137
Hi, Tiffany.
How's your mom?
384
00:17:35,049 --> 00:17:36,949
I'm great, Charlie.
385
00:17:36,892 --> 00:17:38,759
Thanks for asking.
386
00:17:38,705 --> 00:17:41,006
Watch this...
I'm about to close the deal.
387
00:17:40,931 --> 00:17:43,163
Why are you so obsessed
with beating me?
388
00:17:43,093 --> 00:17:45,727
It's not about you.
It's about equal opportunity.
389
00:17:45,637 --> 00:17:48,137
It's about women finally
getting some respect.
390
00:17:48,053 --> 00:17:50,153
So this art center
is gonna have
391
00:17:50,088 --> 00:17:52,488
a beautiful
sculpture courtyard.
392
00:17:52,409 --> 00:17:55,508
Great!
And they all look like her.
393
00:17:55,398 --> 00:17:57,531
Hey! Excuse me.
394
00:17:57,465 --> 00:17:58,431
Hey!
395
00:17:58,419 --> 00:18:00,218
I can't see!
396
00:18:00,167 --> 00:18:04,267
Yeah, buddy, we didn't pay
a $20 cover to see your fat ass.
397
00:18:05,063 --> 00:18:07,664
She means "phat"
in a hip-hop way.
398
00:18:07,576 --> 00:18:09,809
No, I mean "fat"
in a hippo way.
399
00:18:09,737 --> 00:18:12,338
Come on, tubby, hit the bricks.
400
00:18:12,250 --> 00:18:14,450
You boys looking for a fight?
401
00:18:14,381 --> 00:18:16,381
I gotta get some more singles.
402
00:18:16,319 --> 00:18:18,220
We don't want any trouble.
403
00:18:18,164 --> 00:18:20,831
Are you wearing lipstick?
404
00:18:20,739 --> 00:18:22,305
Hey, tough guy, it's gloss.
405
00:18:22,266 --> 00:18:24,499
What are you gonna do
about it, huh?
406
00:18:24,428 --> 00:18:26,161
Huh?
407
00:18:26,113 --> 00:18:27,413
What are you doing?
408
00:18:27,385 --> 00:18:29,485
I'm posturing.
It's a guy thing.
409
00:18:29,420 --> 00:18:31,020
He's not gonna hit anyone.
410
00:18:30,978 --> 00:18:33,045
Huh?!
411
00:18:34,507 --> 00:18:36,141
I'm so sorry.
412
00:18:36,097 --> 00:18:39,297
Those guys may have gotten in
all the punches,
413
00:18:39,182 --> 00:18:43,115
but I made some sarcastic
comments they won't soon forget.
414
00:18:42,965 --> 00:18:45,532
Actually, with that guy's
knee on your head,
415
00:18:45,445 --> 00:18:47,378
everything was kind of muffled.
416
00:18:48,593 --> 00:18:50,727
Look, I know
I went overboard tonight,
417
00:18:50,659 --> 00:18:52,859
but I had to even out
the playing field.
418
00:18:52,790 --> 00:18:55,157
I can't believe
I had to act the way I did.
419
00:18:55,079 --> 00:18:56,512
What about me?
420
00:18:56,478 --> 00:18:58,645
You think I like steak dinners
421
00:18:58,576 --> 00:19:01,210
and drinking
and going to strip clubs?
422
00:19:01,121 --> 00:19:03,487
Who am I kidding?
I love that stuff.
423
00:19:03,409 --> 00:19:07,042
Well, I don't,
and it's not fair.
424
00:19:06,906 --> 00:19:08,240
Caitlin, we're friends.
425
00:19:08,210 --> 00:19:11,010
If you felt like that,
why didn't you just tell me?
426
00:19:10,914 --> 00:19:12,080
I did.
427
00:19:12,058 --> 00:19:14,024
What do I have to do
to get through to you,
428
00:19:13,966 --> 00:19:16,299
put on a leather Teddy
and spiked heels?
429
00:19:18,259 --> 00:19:19,492
Hey!
430
00:19:20,356 --> 00:19:22,124
Knock it off!
431
00:19:22,074 --> 00:19:26,041
I should have listened better.
I will work on that.
432
00:19:25,890 --> 00:19:27,857
You got your art center.
Congratulations.
433
00:19:27,797 --> 00:19:29,097
Thanks.
434
00:19:29,069 --> 00:19:30,336
I want you to know
435
00:19:30,309 --> 00:19:32,775
the days of me being
out of the loop are over.
436
00:19:32,694 --> 00:19:36,194
Hey, Caitlin,
we're on the same side.
437
00:19:36,065 --> 00:19:38,098
I couldn't do anything
around here without you.
438
00:19:38,035 --> 00:19:40,368
Really?
We're a team.
439
00:19:40,292 --> 00:19:41,893
I take on six guys,
440
00:19:41,851 --> 00:19:44,384
and you scream,
"not in the face!"
441
00:19:49,291 --> 00:19:52,191
You know the surprising thing
about tonight?
442
00:19:52,089 --> 00:19:54,590
I think that stripper
really liked me.
443
00:19:54,506 --> 00:19:56,672
Now you're even thinking
like a guy.
444
00:19:59,529 --> 00:20:01,529
Here comes that tennis scene.
445
00:20:02,996 --> 00:20:04,763
It's starting to rain.
446
00:20:04,713 --> 00:20:08,680
It's gonna turn that court
into a big pile of mu...
447
00:20:08,528 --> 00:20:10,994
oh, nice!
448
00:20:13,298 --> 00:20:16,797
What did I tell you about
including me in the guy stuff?
449
00:20:16,668 --> 00:20:19,601
I can't see why
we all can't participate in...
450
00:20:19,497 --> 00:20:20,631
ugh!
451
00:20:20,610 --> 00:20:22,911
They're gonna ruin
the tennis court.
452
00:21:21,891 --> 00:21:24,357
Sit, ubu, sit. Good dog.
453
00:21:24,407 --> 00:21:28,957
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