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1
00:00:00,968 --> 00:00:07,238
So this one's ok.
2
00:00:07,273 --> 00:00:11,242
No, you don't want to get
a used washer and dryer.
3
00:00:11,277 --> 00:00:12,789
I can't afford
a new one.
4
00:00:12,813 --> 00:00:15,614
You're going to put clothes
that touch your body
5
00:00:15,649 --> 00:00:17,215
into somebody's
filthy machine?
6
00:00:17,250 --> 00:00:21,119
I do it here
all the time.
7
00:00:21,521 --> 00:00:25,022
Yeah, but our filth
is family.
8
00:00:25,058 --> 00:00:26,858
What's your problem?
9
00:00:26,893 --> 00:00:29,161
If you get
a washer and dryer,
10
00:00:29,196 --> 00:00:31,429
you won't come here
no more.
11
00:00:31,464 --> 00:00:33,142
I'm still going
to come over.
12
00:00:33,166 --> 00:00:37,569
No, you won't. Nobody comes
here unless they have to.
13
00:00:37,604 --> 00:00:39,738
I got to eat,
don't I?
14
00:00:39,773 --> 00:00:42,273
Yeah, and you'll probably
learn how to cook,
15
00:00:42,309 --> 00:00:44,843
then you'll start
going to the supermarket
16
00:00:44,878 --> 00:00:47,512
with your fancy new
washer and dryer.
17
00:00:47,548 --> 00:00:48,792
I'm putting
the paper away.
18
00:00:48,816 --> 00:00:51,382
You're in no condition
to discuss this now.
19
00:00:51,418 --> 00:00:53,952
Can I have the car
on Saturday night?
20
00:00:53,987 --> 00:00:56,387
Yeah, only if you
promise to bring it back
21
00:00:56,422 --> 00:00:59,423
really dirty and totally
out of gas.
22
00:00:59,459 --> 00:01:01,125
Mark's truck
is in the shop,
23
00:01:01,160 --> 00:01:03,394
so I'm driving us
to the spring dance.
24
00:01:03,429 --> 00:01:06,764
Spring dance. Boy, does
that bring back memories.
25
00:01:06,800 --> 00:01:08,800
Yeah. Waiting around
for weeks
26
00:01:08,835 --> 00:01:11,102
for some cool guy
to ask you
27
00:01:11,138 --> 00:01:14,039
and then ending up
going with some loser
28
00:01:14,074 --> 00:01:15,473
like Glenn Dickerson.
29
00:01:15,508 --> 00:01:18,276
Why, was he a geek
or something?
30
00:01:18,311 --> 00:01:21,146
Ask Jackie.
It's her memory.
31
00:01:21,181 --> 00:01:23,314
No, he was not a geek.
32
00:01:23,350 --> 00:01:25,983
He was the only kid
in 10th grade
33
00:01:26,019 --> 00:01:27,330
that carried
a lunch box.
34
00:01:27,354 --> 00:01:30,121
Let's ice down
that pitching arm.
35
00:01:30,156 --> 00:01:31,689
How was the game?
36
00:01:31,725 --> 00:01:32,802
Oh, it was ok.
37
00:01:32,826 --> 00:01:36,127
Ok? She was throwing
BB's out there.
38
00:01:36,162 --> 00:01:37,728
[Telephone rings]
39
00:01:37,764 --> 00:01:39,230
I'll get it!
40
00:01:39,266 --> 00:01:39,898
Hello?
41
00:01:39,933 --> 00:01:41,632
11 strike-outs, no walks.
42
00:01:41,667 --> 00:01:43,534
She made
their best hitter cry.
43
00:01:43,569 --> 00:01:46,170
Yeah, I beaned her
right in the neck.
44
00:01:46,206 --> 00:01:48,572
That was an accident,
right?
45
00:01:48,608 --> 00:01:49,507
Grow up.
46
00:01:49,542 --> 00:01:53,311
It's for you, Darlene.
It's Barry.
47
00:01:53,346 --> 00:01:53,844
Yeah?
48
00:01:53,880 --> 00:01:55,520
Hey, Barry,
how you doing?
49
00:01:55,548 --> 00:01:58,294
Did Crystal drop anything
off for me today?
50
00:01:58,318 --> 00:01:59,684
There's an envelope
over there.
51
00:01:59,720 --> 00:02:02,332
Yes! Thanks to my
well-connected father,
52
00:02:02,356 --> 00:02:03,433
I now possess
two tickets
53
00:02:03,457 --> 00:02:06,469
to the Bulls play-off
game this Saturday night.
54
00:02:06,493 --> 00:02:07,626
Don't expect me to go
55
00:02:07,661 --> 00:02:10,395
to any stupid
baseball game with you.
56
00:02:10,430 --> 00:02:11,363
Basketball,
Roseanne.
57
00:02:11,398 --> 00:02:14,365
Get off my back.
The answer's still no.
58
00:02:14,400 --> 00:02:18,570
I guess I'll have to
find somebody else then.
59
00:02:18,605 --> 00:02:19,770
Hey! I like basketball.
60
00:02:19,806 --> 00:02:22,118
Really? How fascinating.
But you know...
61
00:02:22,142 --> 00:02:26,378
I think I'm going to
surprise Darlene with these.
62
00:02:26,413 --> 00:02:29,080
How bizarre.
63
00:02:29,115 --> 00:02:29,914
That was Barry.
64
00:02:29,949 --> 00:02:33,184
He just invited me
to the spring dance.
65
00:02:33,187 --> 00:02:35,853
Whoo! All right,
butch!
66
00:02:35,888 --> 00:02:37,667
When is this thing,
Darlene?
67
00:02:37,691 --> 00:02:39,690
It's this Saturday night.
68
00:02:39,726 --> 00:02:40,836
Saturday, huh?
69
00:02:40,860 --> 00:02:42,894
Yeah. Can you drive us?
70
00:02:42,996 --> 00:02:44,662
No problem.
71
00:02:44,698 --> 00:02:45,629
Oh, Darlene!
72
00:02:45,665 --> 00:02:48,033
Congratulations. It's
your first formal dance.
73
00:02:48,068 --> 00:02:51,936
You'll remember this for
the rest of your life.
74
00:02:51,971 --> 00:02:54,039
What are you
going to wear?
75
00:02:54,074 --> 00:02:55,907
I was thinking I'd go...
76
00:02:55,942 --> 00:02:59,344
Shh! I'm not talking
to you.
77
00:04:20,093 --> 00:04:20,925
So whatever I decide
78
00:04:20,961 --> 00:04:23,427
that Darlene likes best,
we'll keep.
79
00:04:23,463 --> 00:04:26,731
And what do you think
of these shoes
80
00:04:26,766 --> 00:04:29,801
with that blue dress?
81
00:04:30,870 --> 00:04:31,669
Uh, clash.
82
00:04:31,705 --> 00:04:34,405
What about something
with an open toe?
83
00:04:34,440 --> 00:04:37,275
No, nobody wants
to see her feet.
84
00:04:37,310 --> 00:04:40,278
Uh, Roseanne.
Bonnie.
85
00:04:40,313 --> 00:04:41,145
Hi, Leon.
86
00:04:41,180 --> 00:04:42,380
This is Linda Wagner
87
00:04:42,415 --> 00:04:44,516
from Rodbell's
company headquarters.
88
00:04:44,551 --> 00:04:47,184
She's here to see
how hard
89
00:04:47,220 --> 00:04:48,920
we're always working.
90
00:04:48,955 --> 00:04:49,955
Oh, cool.
91
00:04:49,990 --> 00:04:53,057
Hey, Linda, what do you
think of these shoes
92
00:04:53,093 --> 00:04:54,425
with this dress?
93
00:04:54,460 --> 00:04:57,262
I think they work.
94
00:04:57,464 --> 00:05:01,031
Roseanne is sort of
our restaurant cutup.
95
00:05:01,067 --> 00:05:03,634
Let's try this again,
shall we?
96
00:05:03,669 --> 00:05:08,072
Ms. Wagner is here
to look over our store
97
00:05:08,108 --> 00:05:11,375
and evaluate
our employees.
98
00:05:11,411 --> 00:05:13,778
That doesn't mean
I have to take
99
00:05:13,813 --> 00:05:15,680
a lie detector test,
does it?
100
00:05:15,715 --> 00:05:18,716
Every time I take one,
I get fired.
101
00:05:18,751 --> 00:05:19,584
Oh, God.
102
00:05:19,619 --> 00:05:20,585
What I'd like to do
103
00:05:20,620 --> 00:05:23,366
is conduct a short interview
with each of you.
104
00:05:23,390 --> 00:05:25,456
Fantastic.
Who'd like to start?
105
00:05:25,491 --> 00:05:28,459
Roseanne, I think I see
your hand up there.
106
00:05:28,494 --> 00:05:29,360
Perfect.
107
00:05:29,395 --> 00:05:32,396
Bonnie, why don't
we leave these two alone
108
00:05:32,432 --> 00:05:33,598
while we tidy up
109
00:05:33,633 --> 00:05:35,600
and serve
our happy customers?
110
00:05:35,635 --> 00:05:39,003
I promise this won't
take long.
111
00:05:39,038 --> 00:05:40,838
This ain't one of those
112
00:05:40,873 --> 00:05:43,141
"if I could be
any animal on earth,
113
00:05:43,176 --> 00:05:46,410
what animal would I be"
kind of deals, is it?
114
00:05:46,445 --> 00:05:50,481
No. Let me start by asking
you about your boss.
115
00:05:50,517 --> 00:05:54,219
Oh, so it is
an animal question, then.
116
00:05:54,221 --> 00:05:57,088
I was wondering,
is he single?
117
00:05:57,124 --> 00:06:00,158
Leon?
Of course he's single.
118
00:06:00,193 --> 00:06:03,795
Well, I find him very attractive.
Don't you?
119
00:06:03,830 --> 00:06:05,229
Well, ok.
120
00:06:05,264 --> 00:06:09,433
I suppose that, uh,
in kind of an offbeat...
121
00:06:09,469 --> 00:06:14,371
Aw, what the hell.
Put me down for no.
122
00:06:14,407 --> 00:06:16,318
There's just something
about him.
123
00:06:16,342 --> 00:06:19,210
He's got this
mysterious charisma.
124
00:06:19,813 --> 00:06:21,345
Uh-huh.
125
00:06:21,380 --> 00:06:22,847
It's strange.
126
00:06:22,882 --> 00:06:24,983
The second
I looked at him,
127
00:06:25,018 --> 00:06:29,320
this voice in my head
said, "I want that man."
128
00:06:29,356 --> 00:06:33,457
How long you been
on the road, Linda?
129
00:06:34,060 --> 00:06:36,126
Almost six weeks. Why?
130
00:06:36,162 --> 00:06:38,663
Time to go home.
131
00:06:43,736 --> 00:06:46,538
Darlene, would you
come down here?
132
00:06:46,573 --> 00:06:47,872
Geez, where is she?
133
00:06:47,908 --> 00:06:50,007
I want to see
some action.
134
00:06:50,043 --> 00:06:51,175
This is so exciting.
135
00:06:51,210 --> 00:06:53,445
Sometimes I wish
my Lonnie was a girl
136
00:06:53,480 --> 00:06:58,583
so I could get him dolled
up in a pretty dress.
137
00:06:59,285 --> 00:07:02,554
I don't do that,
of course.
138
00:07:03,589 --> 00:07:06,290
Oh, well,
take my breath away.
139
00:07:06,325 --> 00:07:07,825
Isn't she exquisite?
140
00:07:07,861 --> 00:07:10,761
Obviously a woman
of taste.
141
00:07:10,797 --> 00:07:12,329
You look weird.
142
00:07:12,365 --> 00:07:14,732
You smell weird.
143
00:07:15,435 --> 00:07:16,435
What?
144
00:07:16,469 --> 00:07:18,135
Mmm...
145
00:07:18,171 --> 00:07:21,405
Try on the blue one.
146
00:07:22,008 --> 00:07:22,974
Why?
147
00:07:23,009 --> 00:07:25,676
Because I don't know how
I feel about this dress
148
00:07:25,711 --> 00:07:28,646
until I see you
in the blue one.
149
00:07:28,681 --> 00:07:29,925
Oh, God.
150
00:07:29,949 --> 00:07:31,381
Oh!
151
00:07:32,919 --> 00:07:34,885
Becky.
152
00:07:35,054 --> 00:07:36,187
Go with her.
153
00:07:36,223 --> 00:07:39,790
Don't leave her alone
with that dress.
154
00:07:43,496 --> 00:07:45,029
This is a joke, right?
155
00:07:45,065 --> 00:07:46,175
No, it's not bad.
156
00:07:46,199 --> 00:07:48,466
You've been
to these things before.
157
00:07:48,501 --> 00:07:49,533
Is this going to work?
158
00:07:49,569 --> 00:07:52,203
Well, that depends on
what you're going as.
159
00:07:52,239 --> 00:07:54,272
Yeah? Well,
what are you wearing?
160
00:07:54,307 --> 00:07:57,842
I decided not to go. These
things are so immature.
161
00:07:57,877 --> 00:07:59,877
Mark bailed, huh?
162
00:07:59,912 --> 00:08:00,989
It was awkward
for him.
163
00:08:01,013 --> 00:08:03,926
The Spanish teacher he
was dating in 11th grade
164
00:08:03,950 --> 00:08:05,560
is going to be
chaperon.
165
00:08:05,584 --> 00:08:08,852
Ok, you want to look
in the mirror?
166
00:08:08,888 --> 00:08:11,122
Sure.
167
00:08:11,424 --> 00:08:13,657
Ohh, why did I do that?
168
00:08:13,692 --> 00:08:16,760
Ok, she wants
to see the blue dress,
169
00:08:16,796 --> 00:08:20,231
let's show her
the blue dress.
170
00:08:27,641 --> 00:08:30,341
"It's too blue."
171
00:08:32,145 --> 00:08:35,179
"Looked better
on the hanger."
172
00:08:36,983 --> 00:08:40,417
"Rhubarb with hair."
173
00:08:41,921 --> 00:08:45,957
"Makes too much noise
when I walk."
174
00:08:46,192 --> 00:08:49,560
"It makes me look
lopsided."
175
00:08:50,296 --> 00:08:54,565
Well, you do look
like Judy Jetson.
176
00:09:00,306 --> 00:09:02,239
Oh, yeah, yeah, yes.
177
00:09:02,275 --> 00:09:05,309
This is definitely it.
178
00:09:05,344 --> 00:09:06,678
Mm-hmm.
179
00:09:06,713 --> 00:09:10,148
This is the first one
that I had on.
180
00:09:10,183 --> 00:09:11,082
I know that,
181
00:09:11,117 --> 00:09:13,818
but these shoes totally
make the difference.
182
00:09:13,853 --> 00:09:15,486
They make the outfit,
right?
183
00:09:15,488 --> 00:09:18,789
- Oh, yeah. Nice shoes.
- Gotcha.
184
00:09:19,158 --> 00:09:22,059
Now you'll have to
start shaving your legs
185
00:09:22,094 --> 00:09:23,561
below the sock line.
186
00:09:23,596 --> 00:09:25,796
Those aren't socks.
187
00:09:26,432 --> 00:09:27,631
Oh, Dan!
188
00:09:27,667 --> 00:09:28,667
Come in here
189
00:09:28,701 --> 00:09:31,201
and meet your beautiful
young daughter!
190
00:09:31,237 --> 00:09:32,948
Wow, you look
incredible.
191
00:09:32,972 --> 00:09:33,972
Thanks.
192
00:09:34,007 --> 00:09:36,852
Maybe you ought to see
her in the yellow one.
193
00:09:36,876 --> 00:09:38,020
No, this one's
perfect.
194
00:09:38,044 --> 00:09:40,890
Besides, I have the next dance.
May I?
195
00:09:40,914 --> 00:09:43,714
Oh, just shoot me now.
196
00:09:44,116 --> 00:09:47,318
♪ As time goes on ♪
197
00:09:47,353 --> 00:09:50,888
♪ I realize ♪
198
00:09:50,923 --> 00:09:54,125
♪ just what you mean ♪
199
00:09:54,160 --> 00:09:57,294
♪ to me ♪
200
00:09:57,329 --> 00:09:59,730
♪ and now ♪
201
00:09:59,765 --> 00:10:02,900
♪ now that you're near ♪
202
00:10:02,936 --> 00:10:05,203
♪ promise you're... ♪
203
00:10:05,238 --> 00:10:06,938
♪ Hmm ♪
204
00:10:06,973 --> 00:10:08,739
♪ da da da da ♪
205
00:10:08,774 --> 00:10:10,975
♪ share ♪
206
00:10:11,011 --> 00:10:11,943
♪ and... ♪
207
00:10:11,978 --> 00:10:13,044
Oh, geez.
208
00:10:13,079 --> 00:10:15,446
How's the pitching
arm, kid?
209
00:10:15,481 --> 00:10:16,213
It's ok.
210
00:10:16,249 --> 00:10:19,450
You really do look
nice, you know.
211
00:10:19,485 --> 00:10:20,184
Thanks.
212
00:10:20,219 --> 00:10:21,485
And you dance divinely.
213
00:10:21,520 --> 00:10:24,188
I'm stepping
all over your feet.
214
00:10:24,223 --> 00:10:26,257
I happen to enjoy that.
215
00:10:26,292 --> 00:10:27,691
I hate slow dancing.
216
00:10:27,727 --> 00:10:30,395
If this Barry tries
to hold you too close,
217
00:10:30,430 --> 00:10:33,030
tell him you got
to throw up.
218
00:10:33,066 --> 00:10:35,466
Oh, I thought I was
going to save that
219
00:10:35,502 --> 00:10:39,437
for when he wanted
to have sex.
220
00:10:42,875 --> 00:10:44,115
I... I got to go.
221
00:10:44,143 --> 00:10:47,578
Mom, I'm going to change
into human clothes.
222
00:10:47,613 --> 00:10:51,149
No, we've got to decide
what we're going to do
223
00:10:51,184 --> 00:10:52,184
about your hair.
224
00:10:52,218 --> 00:10:55,397
Stop it. I like my
hair the way it is.
225
00:10:55,421 --> 00:10:57,822
We'll go
and get a make-over.
226
00:10:57,857 --> 00:11:00,490
We'll go Saturday
before the dance.
227
00:11:00,526 --> 00:11:01,492
No! Forget it.
228
00:11:01,527 --> 00:11:04,462
This is something I always
wanted to do with you.
229
00:11:04,497 --> 00:11:06,697
It'd be
like a girl thing.
230
00:11:06,732 --> 00:11:09,366
Mom, I have practice
on Saturday.
231
00:11:09,402 --> 00:11:10,334
You could miss it.
232
00:11:10,370 --> 00:11:13,804
If I do, I might not
start in the next game.
233
00:11:13,840 --> 00:11:16,808
Your first formal dance
is way more important.
234
00:11:16,843 --> 00:11:19,343
Yeah?
Then why don't you go?
235
00:11:19,379 --> 00:11:22,846
Because I have
nothing to wear.
236
00:11:31,290 --> 00:11:33,958
Boy, you better
go to practice.
237
00:11:33,993 --> 00:11:36,460
You missed me by a mile.
238
00:11:36,496 --> 00:11:38,229
That's not paid for yet.
239
00:11:38,264 --> 00:11:40,998
Take it back.
Take them all back.
240
00:11:41,034 --> 00:11:42,599
I'll get my own dress.
241
00:11:42,635 --> 00:11:44,301
You pick it up.
242
00:11:44,337 --> 00:11:45,036
No.
243
00:11:45,071 --> 00:11:46,148
Pick it up, Darlene.
244
00:11:46,172 --> 00:11:48,839
Why, so you can play
Barbie doll some more?
245
00:11:48,874 --> 00:11:50,052
What are you
talking about?
246
00:11:50,076 --> 00:11:53,944
I bought you a beautiful
dress for the dance!
247
00:11:53,979 --> 00:11:56,680
Why don't you give me
this kind of attention
248
00:11:56,716 --> 00:11:57,716
when I do real stuff,
249
00:11:57,750 --> 00:12:01,084
like striking out 11 guys
without walking anybody?
250
00:12:01,120 --> 00:12:02,653
Oh, ok.
251
00:12:02,688 --> 00:12:04,788
Way to go.
252
00:12:05,324 --> 00:12:08,426
You ever brag about that
to Jackie and Crystal? No.
253
00:12:08,461 --> 00:12:11,329
But some guy asks me
to some lame dance,
254
00:12:11,364 --> 00:12:12,896
and I'm a big deal.
255
00:12:12,932 --> 00:12:13,964
That's so sick.
256
00:12:14,000 --> 00:12:17,167
How come you never said
anything about this before?
257
00:12:17,203 --> 00:12:18,347
Oh, why bother?
258
00:12:18,371 --> 00:12:21,238
I want to talk
about this some more.
259
00:12:21,274 --> 00:12:22,384
Fine. Go ahead.
260
00:12:22,408 --> 00:12:25,676
Man, you are such
a spoiled brat,
261
00:12:25,711 --> 00:12:29,013
and I am sick of it.
262
00:12:42,728 --> 00:12:46,107
I told you I wanted every
customer to have a flower.
263
00:12:46,131 --> 00:12:49,433
Oh, not now, Leon,
I ain't in the mood.
264
00:12:49,468 --> 00:12:53,003
Roseanne, this customer
does not have a flower,
265
00:12:53,038 --> 00:12:56,907
so find a vase
and give him one.
266
00:12:59,212 --> 00:13:00,944
There.
267
00:13:02,582 --> 00:13:03,614
Well, someone forgot
268
00:13:03,649 --> 00:13:06,950
to take her polite pill
this morning, huh?
269
00:13:06,986 --> 00:13:08,952
Why don't you
lay off?
270
00:13:08,988 --> 00:13:11,288
She's having
a bad day.
271
00:13:11,324 --> 00:13:13,202
Good afternoon,
everybody.
272
00:13:13,226 --> 00:13:15,292
Ms. Wagner. For you.
273
00:13:15,327 --> 00:13:17,861
A freshly cut
spring flower.
274
00:13:17,897 --> 00:13:19,129
How sweet.
275
00:13:19,164 --> 00:13:24,134
I got to leave early for
my kid's baseball game.
276
00:13:24,169 --> 00:13:25,269
No, no, no, no.
277
00:13:25,304 --> 00:13:28,072
This is our
evaluation day, remember?
278
00:13:28,107 --> 00:13:31,575
Now, please have a seat.
279
00:13:32,411 --> 00:13:33,310
And observe
280
00:13:33,346 --> 00:13:38,816
your well-oiled Rodbell's
machine in action.
281
00:13:41,987 --> 00:13:44,288
I have a better idea.
282
00:13:44,323 --> 00:13:45,122
Shoot.
283
00:13:45,157 --> 00:13:47,958
Why don't the two of us
284
00:13:47,993 --> 00:13:49,994
find a nice little
Italian restaurant,
285
00:13:50,029 --> 00:13:54,231
order a bottle of Chianti,
and get to know each other?
286
00:13:54,266 --> 00:13:56,267
Whoa.
Whoa, whoa, whoa.
287
00:13:56,302 --> 00:14:00,437
Way too much information
in that sentence.
288
00:14:01,908 --> 00:14:03,741
These evaluations
are just so dull.
289
00:14:03,776 --> 00:14:10,681
I thought we could find something more...
Exciting to do.
290
00:14:11,884 --> 00:14:16,053
You're coming on
to me here, right?
291
00:14:16,488 --> 00:14:19,190
I'm trying.
292
00:14:19,558 --> 00:14:22,659
Well, I would like
a cup of coffee.
293
00:14:22,695 --> 00:14:24,995
Would you like
some coffee?
294
00:14:25,031 --> 00:14:26,031
Sure.
295
00:14:26,065 --> 00:14:27,497
Ok.
296
00:14:28,167 --> 00:14:30,400
Go for it, stud.
297
00:14:30,436 --> 00:14:31,202
No way.
298
00:14:31,237 --> 00:14:33,415
Where else are you
going to find
299
00:14:33,439 --> 00:14:37,708
a woman that good-looking
and that desperate?
300
00:14:38,211 --> 00:14:40,144
No. Not interested.
301
00:14:40,179 --> 00:14:41,345
Go on over there.
302
00:14:41,380 --> 00:14:44,014
If you take her out,
I can leave.
303
00:14:44,050 --> 00:14:48,119
So stop acting like you
got integrity and do it.
304
00:14:48,154 --> 00:14:49,386
No, I'm not looking
305
00:14:49,421 --> 00:14:51,388
for this kind
of relationship.
306
00:14:51,423 --> 00:14:53,235
She don't want
no relationship.
307
00:14:53,259 --> 00:14:56,293
She just wants a little
slap and tickle.
308
00:14:56,328 --> 00:14:58,996
Think of it
as a career move, Leon.
309
00:14:59,031 --> 00:15:02,211
Yeah, maybe you'll get
promoted to some restaurant
310
00:15:02,235 --> 00:15:05,013
where, like, the
employees respect you.
311
00:15:05,037 --> 00:15:06,937
I'm not sleeping
with her
312
00:15:06,973 --> 00:15:09,206
just so you can
leave early.
313
00:15:09,242 --> 00:15:13,310
Geez, I ask you for
one little favor.
314
00:15:15,814 --> 00:15:16,780
Linda.
315
00:15:16,815 --> 00:15:17,581
Ahem.
316
00:15:17,616 --> 00:15:20,317
I, uh, really appreciate
your offer.
317
00:15:20,353 --> 00:15:21,986
It's very flattering.
318
00:15:22,021 --> 00:15:27,057
But, uh, I'm already
seeing somebody else.
319
00:15:27,093 --> 00:15:28,625
You are not.
320
00:15:28,660 --> 00:15:30,160
Am, too!
321
00:15:31,230 --> 00:15:33,897
Leon, don't worry,
it's ok.
322
00:15:33,932 --> 00:15:36,233
But it could
have been fun.
323
00:15:36,268 --> 00:15:40,570
Ok, let's talk
about this restaurant.
324
00:15:40,606 --> 00:15:41,839
Thank you.
325
00:15:41,841 --> 00:15:43,708
Am I missing
something here?
326
00:15:43,743 --> 00:15:46,476
What does she see
in him?
327
00:15:46,512 --> 00:15:47,622
I don't know.
328
00:15:47,646 --> 00:15:50,147
If you were single,
would you...
329
00:15:50,183 --> 00:15:50,881
No.
330
00:15:50,917 --> 00:15:52,649
What if he was rich?
331
00:15:52,685 --> 00:15:53,317
No.
332
00:15:53,352 --> 00:15:55,619
Or a movie star
or royalty?
333
00:15:55,654 --> 00:15:56,353
Uh-uh.
334
00:15:56,388 --> 00:15:58,856
If he were
the last man on earth?
335
00:15:58,891 --> 00:16:01,625
I'd demand a re-count.
336
00:16:05,865 --> 00:16:08,265
I gave the tickets
to a friend.
337
00:16:08,300 --> 00:16:11,401
Yeah, dad, I know
how hard it was
338
00:16:11,437 --> 00:16:13,604
for you to get
the tickets.
339
00:16:13,639 --> 00:16:16,907
Now Darlene's not going
to the dance, so...
340
00:16:16,943 --> 00:16:20,010
Ok, how many
coffee filters
341
00:16:20,046 --> 00:16:21,278
would you have to sell
342
00:16:21,313 --> 00:16:24,348
for me to get
two more tickets?
343
00:16:24,383 --> 00:16:26,650
Ok, put me down
for 25,000.
344
00:16:26,685 --> 00:16:29,753
Yeah, dad, see what
you can do. Thanks.
345
00:16:29,788 --> 00:16:33,124
The kids are going
to have to start
346
00:16:33,159 --> 00:16:34,558
drinking coffee.
347
00:16:34,593 --> 00:16:38,429
What's this about Darlene's
not going to the dance?
348
00:16:38,464 --> 00:16:40,775
She called Barry
and backed out.
349
00:16:40,799 --> 00:16:43,166
I knew that was
going to happen!
350
00:16:43,202 --> 00:16:46,002
Now I have to
go talk to her.
351
00:16:46,038 --> 00:16:50,006
The thing is, Dan,
this is all my fault.
352
00:16:50,042 --> 00:16:51,052
Imagine that.
353
00:16:51,076 --> 00:16:54,311
You spend all your life
trying to teach your kids
354
00:16:54,347 --> 00:16:55,379
that they're
always wrong,
355
00:16:55,414 --> 00:17:00,651
and then something like
this has to go and happen.
356
00:17:01,954 --> 00:17:04,655
Darlene?
357
00:17:06,125 --> 00:17:07,291
Hi.
358
00:17:07,326 --> 00:17:08,726
Hey.
359
00:17:08,761 --> 00:17:10,361
Can I come in?
360
00:17:10,396 --> 00:17:11,573
I guess so.
361
00:17:11,597 --> 00:17:15,198
I tried to get off
early from work today
362
00:17:15,234 --> 00:17:17,568
so I could go
to your practice.
363
00:17:17,603 --> 00:17:20,671
Yeah, well, we don't
practice on Fridays.
364
00:17:20,706 --> 00:17:23,374
Good. Then I didn't
miss anything.
365
00:17:23,409 --> 00:17:24,508
When's the next game?
366
00:17:24,543 --> 00:17:26,943
It's all right.
You don't have to come.
367
00:17:26,979 --> 00:17:29,613
No, next time you bean
somebody in the neck,
368
00:17:29,649 --> 00:17:32,816
I want to be there
cheering you on.
369
00:17:32,851 --> 00:17:33,550
Fine.
370
00:17:33,586 --> 00:17:34,919
You just better know
371
00:17:34,954 --> 00:17:37,488
that when I pitch,
I spit.
372
00:17:37,523 --> 00:17:40,123
So? When I dust,
I spit.
373
00:17:40,159 --> 00:17:42,025
I've got
a great idea.
374
00:17:42,060 --> 00:17:43,960
I just thought
of this.
375
00:17:43,996 --> 00:17:45,807
You ought
to call up Barry
376
00:17:45,831 --> 00:17:48,465
and tell him you
will go to the dance
377
00:17:48,501 --> 00:17:49,778
and wear
whatever you want
378
00:17:49,802 --> 00:17:53,003
and have you hair
however you want it.
379
00:17:53,039 --> 00:17:54,438
No.
380
00:17:54,473 --> 00:17:58,074
Don't miss out on this
just to get back at me.
381
00:17:58,110 --> 00:18:00,444
There's better ways
to get back at me.
382
00:18:00,479 --> 00:18:04,347
Maybe Becky's boyfriend
has a little brother.
383
00:18:04,383 --> 00:18:07,117
I didn't blow the dance
because of you.
384
00:18:07,152 --> 00:18:08,785
It was a lot of things.
385
00:18:08,821 --> 00:18:11,421
Every time I would
put on those dresses,
386
00:18:11,456 --> 00:18:12,756
everybody would
treat me weird.
387
00:18:12,791 --> 00:18:16,326
I didn't feel like
the same person anymore.
388
00:18:16,329 --> 00:18:17,961
Well, no, you kind of...
389
00:18:17,996 --> 00:18:21,831
Are not like
the same person anymore,
390
00:18:21,867 --> 00:18:23,400
you know?
391
00:18:28,740 --> 00:18:29,540
So...
392
00:18:29,575 --> 00:18:32,942
Sorry. I guess
I shouldn't do that.
393
00:18:32,978 --> 00:18:34,744
Oh, that's ok.
394
00:18:34,780 --> 00:18:38,982
Look, I just may never get
into proms and stuff.
395
00:18:39,017 --> 00:18:41,751
I like dating
and boys and everything.
396
00:18:41,787 --> 00:18:45,722
I just don't think you have
to go through the crap
397
00:18:45,757 --> 00:18:47,925
to get
to the good stuff.
398
00:18:47,960 --> 00:18:49,471
You've been
hanging out
399
00:18:49,495 --> 00:18:51,139
with aunt Jackie
too much.
400
00:18:51,163 --> 00:18:55,466
I'm sorry that I threw
that dress on the floor.
401
00:18:55,501 --> 00:18:57,968
It's ok.
They took it back.
402
00:18:58,003 --> 00:19:00,504
I did buy you
these shoes
403
00:19:00,539 --> 00:19:02,417
that I think
you'll like.
404
00:19:02,441 --> 00:19:05,175
I can't wear
those high heels.
405
00:19:05,210 --> 00:19:06,844
Just open the box.
406
00:19:06,879 --> 00:19:08,812
Oh, man.
407
00:19:12,585 --> 00:19:15,185
Golf shoes?
408
00:19:15,855 --> 00:19:19,156
Mom, you got me
golf shoes?
409
00:19:19,191 --> 00:19:22,793
Oh, you mean they're
not baseball shoes?
410
00:19:22,828 --> 00:19:25,862
I should have listened
to the sales guy.
411
00:19:25,898 --> 00:19:29,934
I just thought
these were way cuter.
412
00:19:35,174 --> 00:19:36,985
It's almost time
for tip-off.
413
00:19:37,009 --> 00:19:39,143
I had to change
into my lucky sweats.
414
00:19:39,178 --> 00:19:43,247
This is going to be way better
than some stupid dance.
415
00:19:43,282 --> 00:19:46,595
I'll bet you 5 bucks Jordan
pulls a triple double.
416
00:19:46,619 --> 00:19:49,353
You'd have to be crazy
to take that bet.
417
00:19:49,388 --> 00:19:51,622
I'll give you the odds.
418
00:19:51,657 --> 00:19:52,289
No way.
419
00:19:52,324 --> 00:19:56,326
So where did mom run off
to hide this time?
420
00:19:56,362 --> 00:19:57,127
Jackie's.
421
00:19:57,163 --> 00:20:00,063
She's coming
to your game Monday.
422
00:20:00,098 --> 00:20:00,730
I know.
423
00:20:00,766 --> 00:20:02,633
You don't think
if it's cold
424
00:20:02,668 --> 00:20:04,868
she'll run
to the pitcher's mound
425
00:20:04,903 --> 00:20:06,303
to give me my sweater?
426
00:20:06,338 --> 00:20:08,605
I think
you can count on it.
427
00:20:08,640 --> 00:20:10,707
She's probably sewing
your baseball mitt
428
00:20:10,742 --> 00:20:13,276
onto your uniform sleeve
right now.
429
00:20:13,312 --> 00:20:14,422
Oh, here they come.
430
00:20:14,446 --> 00:20:19,116
Bulls, bulls, bulls, bulls,
bulls, bulls, bulls, ow!
431
00:20:19,151 --> 00:20:20,117
[Telephone rings]
432
00:20:20,152 --> 00:20:22,286
Oh, man. Let it ring.
433
00:20:22,321 --> 00:20:23,753
I'll get it.
434
00:20:23,789 --> 00:20:24,899
Put it up!
435
00:20:24,923 --> 00:20:27,824
Foul!
Get in the game! Jerk.
436
00:20:27,860 --> 00:20:29,360
Speak.
437
00:20:30,029 --> 00:20:31,428
Barry, hey.
438
00:20:31,464 --> 00:20:33,763
No, I'm not mad
at you.
439
00:20:33,799 --> 00:20:37,301
No, I thought
you were mad at me.
440
00:20:37,336 --> 00:20:38,568
Pizza?
441
00:20:38,604 --> 00:20:39,604
Now?
442
00:20:39,638 --> 00:20:43,840
Well, I'm kind of watching
the game with my dad.
443
00:20:43,876 --> 00:20:47,244
Well, I don't know.
444
00:20:48,047 --> 00:20:49,846
Sure I can
ditch him.
445
00:20:49,882 --> 00:20:53,050
Yeah, I'll see you
in like 10.
446
00:20:53,085 --> 00:20:55,085
Ok, bye.
447
00:20:56,222 --> 00:20:56,987
Sorry, dad.
448
00:20:57,022 --> 00:21:00,090
Try to be back by dawn.
449
00:21:00,092 --> 00:21:03,393
Yeah, we'll play it
by ear.
450
00:21:04,497 --> 00:21:07,397
What are you up to,
Philbert?
451
00:21:07,432 --> 00:21:08,966
Nothing.
452
00:21:09,702 --> 00:21:10,634
Hey, Deej.
453
00:21:10,669 --> 00:21:15,038
Who do you like
in the play-offs?
454
00:21:15,073 --> 00:21:16,373
What's a play-off?
455
00:21:16,408 --> 00:21:19,543
Ho ho ho.
Park it right here, bud.
456
00:21:19,578 --> 00:21:22,279
I'll tell you all
about it.
457
00:21:22,314 --> 00:21:24,415
You got any money?
458
00:21:34,492 --> 00:21:36,304
Another day,
another dollar,
459
00:21:36,328 --> 00:21:37,127
huh, ladies?
460
00:21:37,162 --> 00:21:40,230
I haven't exactly
counted my tips yet,
461
00:21:40,266 --> 00:21:41,998
but that sounds
about right.
462
00:21:42,034 --> 00:21:45,402
Leon, how did we do
on that evaluation?
463
00:21:45,437 --> 00:21:48,272
Well, somehow,
we did very well.
464
00:21:48,307 --> 00:21:51,408
It was a good thing
you didn't sleep with her.
465
00:21:51,443 --> 00:21:54,344
We might have
all got fired.
466
00:21:54,379 --> 00:21:56,246
Hello, Leon.
You ready?
467
00:21:56,282 --> 00:21:58,182
Yeah, almost.
468
00:21:58,383 --> 00:21:59,860
Oh, there's
my blue shirt.
469
00:21:59,884 --> 00:22:04,455
I was looking all over
for that this morning.
470
00:22:05,223 --> 00:22:06,290
Oh, I'm sorry.
471
00:22:06,325 --> 00:22:09,926
Roseanne, Bonnie, this is
my friend Jerry Gimble.
472
00:22:09,962 --> 00:22:11,528
It's nice to meet you.
473
00:22:11,563 --> 00:22:15,398
Leon has told me so much
about both of you.
474
00:22:15,434 --> 00:22:19,102
So, Leon, we do have
7:00 dinner reservations,
475
00:22:19,137 --> 00:22:20,036
and I'm sure
476
00:22:20,072 --> 00:22:23,674
that Phil and Tom
are already there, so...
477
00:22:23,709 --> 00:22:24,541
Ok, ok.
478
00:22:24,577 --> 00:22:27,711
Uh, do it all again
tomorrow, shall we?
479
00:22:27,746 --> 00:22:28,945
Definitely.
480
00:22:28,981 --> 00:22:29,679
All righty.
481
00:22:29,715 --> 00:22:30,981
Nice to meet you.
482
00:22:31,016 --> 00:22:34,618
Nice to meet you, too.
Bye.
483
00:22:38,523 --> 00:22:41,257
- Ohh.
- Ohh.
484
00:22:41,927 --> 00:22:46,597
Captioning performed by the
National Captioning Institute, Inc.
485
00:22:48,734 --> 00:22:56,006
"Oh, it looked better
on the hanger."
486
00:22:56,041 --> 00:22:58,509
"Lambada."
487
00:22:59,412 --> 00:23:01,945
[Laughter]
488
00:23:13,025 --> 00:23:20,764
"It's too much noise
when I walk."
489
00:23:20,799 --> 00:23:21,731
Clear.
490
00:23:21,767 --> 00:23:25,802
Now, that was my best
performance of the day.
33173
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