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1
00:00:09,232 --> 00:00:10,865
Josh, Lucy.
2
00:00:10,968 --> 00:00:12,726
- Hi, Tom.
- Hi! [laughs]
3
00:00:12,751 --> 00:00:14,513
Well... [laughs] this is a surprise.
4
00:00:14,545 --> 00:00:17,612
What in Sam Heck are you kids
doing all the way out here?
5
00:00:17,714 --> 00:00:21,632
Well, uh, we have a
bit of breaking news.
6
00:00:21,657 --> 00:00:23,282
- News?
- We're getting married.
7
00:00:23,307 --> 00:00:25,387
- [laughs] Yeah.
- You guys!
8
00:00:25,613 --> 00:00:27,028
[both laugh]
9
00:00:28,115 --> 00:00:30,849
You know your mother's been
hoping for this for a long time,
10
00:00:30,874 --> 00:00:32,908
so when she gets the news,
11
00:00:33,010 --> 00:00:35,644
we might be in for a bit of a reaction.
12
00:00:35,746 --> 00:00:38,046
Yeah, God. Yeah, that's a good point.
13
00:00:38,148 --> 00:00:41,283
Uh, maybe we should
take some precautions.
14
00:00:41,385 --> 00:00:42,417
Yeah.
15
00:00:42,519 --> 00:00:44,219
[dramatic music]
16
00:00:44,321 --> 00:00:47,389
Glad you called. That mom
looks highly excitable.
17
00:00:47,491 --> 00:00:49,124
When she finds out
you're getting married,
18
00:00:49,226 --> 00:00:50,319
she's gonna explode.
19
00:00:50,382 --> 00:00:52,294
- Are we in danger?
- Well, it depends.
20
00:00:52,396 --> 00:00:55,230
This mom... does she
particularly like weddings?
21
00:00:55,332 --> 00:00:57,799
[stammering] I-I would
go so far as to say
22
00:00:57,901 --> 00:01:00,235
she maybe loves weddings.
23
00:01:00,337 --> 00:01:02,003
[sighs] All right.
24
00:01:02,105 --> 00:01:05,840
This mom... when she looks at
you, does she see a full-grown man?
25
00:01:05,943 --> 00:01:09,010
Or does she still see her tiny,
little, itty-bitty baby boy?
26
00:01:09,112 --> 00:01:10,804
Uh...
27
00:01:12,382 --> 00:01:14,082
probably the second one.
28
00:01:14,184 --> 00:01:16,585
- Which one did I say second?
- Itty... itty-bitty baby boy.
29
00:01:16,687 --> 00:01:18,787
Crap. [sighs] This is gonna get hairy,
30
00:01:18,889 --> 00:01:20,188
but we'll get through it.
31
00:01:20,290 --> 00:01:22,123
Thanks for your help,
mister... Greenberg.
32
00:01:22,225 --> 00:01:23,658
Greenberg.
33
00:01:23,760 --> 00:01:26,261
Son, what's this mom's religion?
34
00:01:26,363 --> 00:01:28,163
- She's Jewish.
- Back it up, people!
35
00:01:28,265 --> 00:01:30,131
Back it up! Let's go!
36
00:01:30,233 --> 00:01:31,833
Go, go! Move, move!
37
00:01:32,037 --> 00:01:33,837
It's not worth it! Get out of here!
38
00:01:36,306 --> 00:01:39,307
[TALON robot whirring]
39
00:01:49,052 --> 00:01:51,653
Well, hello!
40
00:01:51,755 --> 00:01:53,288
Is this for me?
41
00:01:53,390 --> 00:01:56,391
[whirring]
42
00:02:00,897 --> 00:02:03,632
Josh is getting married?
43
00:02:03,734 --> 00:02:04,833
[screams]
44
00:02:04,935 --> 00:02:05,900
Take cover!
45
00:02:06,003 --> 00:02:07,335
[all scream]
46
00:02:10,907 --> 00:02:14,976
Well, this is just great news.
47
00:02:15,078 --> 00:02:17,979
[downtempo electronic music]
48
00:02:19,082 --> 00:02:20,382
Ah!
49
00:02:23,787 --> 00:02:25,754
[squeaks]
50
00:02:27,524 --> 00:02:28,857
[growls]
51
00:02:44,874 --> 00:02:47,786
Congratulations on the wonderful news.
52
00:02:47,811 --> 00:02:49,711
We are both so happy for you.
53
00:02:49,813 --> 00:02:51,446
Our Liz Greenberg,
54
00:02:51,548 --> 00:02:54,753
officially a partner at
Hayes, Weber, and Rudnisky.
55
00:02:54,778 --> 00:02:58,083
Thank you very much. I
appreciate this opportunity,
56
00:02:58,108 --> 00:03:01,309
and I will do my utmost
to make this firm proud.
57
00:03:06,897 --> 00:03:08,063
Yes!
58
00:03:08,165 --> 00:03:10,425
[breathing rhythmically]
59
00:03:10,450 --> 00:03:12,383
Yeah!
60
00:03:12,669 --> 00:03:14,048
[whimpering] I did it.
61
00:03:14,935 --> 00:03:17,112
Yes! Yes! Yes! Yes! Yes!
62
00:03:17,137 --> 00:03:18,604
[roars] Yes!
63
00:03:20,343 --> 00:03:22,877
- Hey, Liz.
- Good morning.
64
00:03:22,979 --> 00:03:25,380
[knocking] Mom?
65
00:03:30,887 --> 00:03:33,621
Hello? Is anyone home?
66
00:03:33,724 --> 00:03:35,123
Looking for your mom and dad?
67
00:03:35,225 --> 00:03:37,058
Uh, my stepdad. Yes.
68
00:03:37,160 --> 00:03:38,927
I think they're out back.
69
00:03:39,029 --> 00:03:40,395
- There you are.
- Oh, hey.
70
00:03:40,497 --> 00:03:41,651
Hey. [both chuckle]
71
00:03:41,676 --> 00:03:44,342
- I've got some big news.
- Oh, we've already heard.
72
00:03:44,367 --> 00:03:46,009
Josh is getting married.
73
00:03:46,034 --> 00:03:47,533
Oh, I know. I know, it's great.
74
00:03:47,558 --> 00:03:49,548
I-I have some other big news.
75
00:03:49,573 --> 00:03:51,137
- Ah, yeah?
- Where are you guys going?
76
00:03:51,162 --> 00:03:53,742
Oh, your mother and I have decided
77
00:03:53,844 --> 00:03:55,110
to drop out of society,
78
00:03:55,212 --> 00:03:58,146
and follow Josh's wedding full-time.
79
00:03:58,248 --> 00:03:59,147
Yeah.
80
00:03:59,249 --> 00:04:01,015
Full... full-time?
81
00:04:01,118 --> 00:04:03,017
[lively rock music]
82
00:04:03,120 --> 00:04:04,686
[horn honks]
83
00:04:07,190 --> 00:04:09,023
- So check it out.
- Okay.
84
00:04:09,126 --> 00:04:12,794
We're gonna hit them at
the stationary store today.
85
00:04:12,896 --> 00:04:13,566
Okay.
86
00:04:13,591 --> 00:04:15,497
Definitely at the dress-fitting.
87
00:04:15,599 --> 00:04:18,333
- Mm-hmm.
- And if we drive all night...
88
00:04:18,435 --> 00:04:20,196
- [chuckles]
- We are gonna make it
89
00:04:20,221 --> 00:04:22,303
to the cake tasting.
90
00:04:22,405 --> 00:04:24,839
Man, I could go for some cake right now.
91
00:04:24,941 --> 00:04:27,008
[both laugh]
92
00:04:27,110 --> 00:04:30,011
Wait, cakes... Okay,
are... are you guys high?
93
00:04:30,113 --> 00:04:32,021
Wow, cool... cool instrument.
94
00:04:32,046 --> 00:04:37,016
I just wanted... had some
really cool news at work today.
95
00:04:37,170 --> 00:04:39,950
- I made partner!
- Whoa... bad...
96
00:04:43,093 --> 00:04:45,360
Okay, here's the deal, Liz.
97
00:04:45,462 --> 00:04:47,695
I know that you're into
this whole partner trip,
98
00:04:47,798 --> 00:04:49,564
and... and that's cool,
99
00:04:49,666 --> 00:04:51,366
but it's harshing our mellow.
100
00:04:51,468 --> 00:04:54,135
[moaning]
101
00:04:54,237 --> 00:04:56,738
- Tom!
- Everything's still groovy.
102
00:04:56,840 --> 00:04:59,307
We're here at the stationary store, man.
103
00:04:59,409 --> 00:05:01,075
- Whoo!
- Whoo-hoo-hoo!
104
00:05:01,178 --> 00:05:03,178
- Whoo!
- Whoo-hoo-hoo!
105
00:05:03,280 --> 00:05:04,532
Okay, so which one do you like better?
106
00:05:04,557 --> 00:05:06,106
- Eggshell or off-white?
- Uh, which one is which?
107
00:05:06,131 --> 00:05:07,348
The lighter one is eggshell.
108
00:05:07,450 --> 00:05:08,483
- This one?
- Yeah.
109
00:05:08,585 --> 00:05:10,585
- both: Whoo!
- Invitations!
110
00:05:10,610 --> 00:05:13,154
[cheers]
111
00:05:13,256 --> 00:05:15,190
- Eggshell!
- Eggshell!
112
00:05:15,292 --> 00:05:17,992
Whoa, you got a really cool mom and dad.
113
00:05:18,094 --> 00:05:20,195
Stepdad.
114
00:05:20,297 --> 00:05:21,763
He's my stepdad.
115
00:05:21,865 --> 00:05:24,766
[gentle piano plays over intercom]
116
00:05:29,639 --> 00:05:32,540
[solemn music]
117
00:05:38,982 --> 00:05:40,882
[dialing]
118
00:05:40,984 --> 00:05:43,218
[line trilling]
119
00:05:43,320 --> 00:05:44,706
This is Joel.
120
00:05:45,989 --> 00:05:47,294
Hello?
121
00:05:48,525 --> 00:05:50,058
Hi... hi, Dad.
122
00:05:56,046 --> 00:05:57,378
Your assistant said you were so busy,
123
00:05:57,481 --> 00:05:58,768
so thank you for squeezing me in.
124
00:05:58,793 --> 00:06:01,284
Oh, it's no problem. A client cancelled.
125
00:06:02,319 --> 00:06:03,456
Lucky me.
126
00:06:04,721 --> 00:06:06,854
So, uh, are you still
clerking for that judge?
127
00:06:07,031 --> 00:06:09,459
No, I left that job over five years ago.
128
00:06:09,593 --> 00:06:11,159
Oh, that's right.
129
00:06:11,261 --> 00:06:13,995
I'm actually over at Hayes,
Weber, and Rudnisky now.
130
00:06:14,051 --> 00:06:15,250
Good firm. I hear they're pretty rough
131
00:06:15,352 --> 00:06:17,319
on their associates over there.
132
00:06:17,421 --> 00:06:18,754
Well, I don't have to worry about that
133
00:06:18,856 --> 00:06:20,289
now that I'm a partner.
134
00:06:20,391 --> 00:06:22,858
Hold on.
135
00:06:22,960 --> 00:06:24,583
You're a partner? Holy...
136
00:06:24,608 --> 00:06:25,627
[laughs]
137
00:06:25,729 --> 00:06:26,695
What are you? The youngest partner
138
00:06:26,797 --> 00:06:28,330
in the history of that firm?
139
00:06:28,432 --> 00:06:29,655
Guilty.
140
00:06:29,680 --> 00:06:31,343
How old are you? 32?
141
00:06:31,368 --> 00:06:32,801
I just turned 31.
142
00:06:32,903 --> 00:06:35,003
You know, I was exactly your age
143
00:06:35,106 --> 00:06:36,472
when I made partner.
144
00:06:36,574 --> 00:06:38,574
I knew that actually.
145
00:06:44,048 --> 00:06:46,048
To the new partner.
146
00:06:56,460 --> 00:06:57,993
What was that?
147
00:06:58,095 --> 00:07:00,996
- Nothing.
- No, you made a face.
148
00:07:01,098 --> 00:07:02,865
- Is the wine bad?
- No, no, it's fine.
149
00:07:02,967 --> 00:07:04,166
Don't lie.
150
00:07:04,268 --> 00:07:07,169
- Okay, it's not great.
- Further.
151
00:07:07,271 --> 00:07:08,804
What do you mean? It's not good?
152
00:07:08,906 --> 00:07:11,006
Say what's on your mind. You know it.
153
00:07:11,108 --> 00:07:12,508
Say the words.
154
00:07:12,610 --> 00:07:14,510
It sucks.
155
00:07:14,612 --> 00:07:16,345
This wine sucks.
156
00:07:16,447 --> 00:07:18,080
How did you do that?
157
00:07:18,182 --> 00:07:21,216
How did you know this wine sucked?
158
00:07:21,318 --> 00:07:24,419
I don't know, I-I tasted
it, and it came to me?
159
00:07:24,522 --> 00:07:26,054
Come with me.
160
00:07:26,157 --> 00:07:28,557
[discordant synth music]
161
00:07:28,659 --> 00:07:30,058
I was born with a gift,
162
00:07:30,161 --> 00:07:31,527
a gift I thought would die with me,
163
00:07:31,629 --> 00:07:33,362
but it lives on.
164
00:07:33,464 --> 00:07:35,063
You inherited it.
165
00:07:35,166 --> 00:07:37,666
A gift? What gift?
166
00:07:37,691 --> 00:07:39,027
You have the incredible ability
167
00:07:39,052 --> 00:07:41,503
to tell what's good and what sucks.
168
00:07:41,528 --> 00:07:42,604
I don't know what you're talking about.
169
00:07:42,706 --> 00:07:44,873
I'm just normal. I'm a...
170
00:07:44,975 --> 00:07:46,608
I'm a normal, simple woman.
171
00:07:46,710 --> 00:07:49,244
Patti's normal, Josh is normal,
172
00:07:49,346 --> 00:07:51,613
Tom...
173
00:07:51,715 --> 00:07:53,916
I don't know what Tom is.
174
00:07:54,018 --> 00:07:57,586
But you... you have a special sight.
175
00:07:57,688 --> 00:08:01,056
Here, what do you think
of this public art?
176
00:08:01,158 --> 00:08:04,193
I don't know, it's just art.
177
00:08:04,295 --> 00:08:06,061
Focus, Liz, focus.
178
00:08:20,010 --> 00:08:21,276
It sucks.
179
00:08:24,248 --> 00:08:25,612
Concentrate.
180
00:08:25,637 --> 00:08:28,371
Is it good? Or does it suck?
181
00:08:33,991 --> 00:08:37,793
Good. This is a good tie.
182
00:08:37,895 --> 00:08:39,995
This is a good tie.
183
00:08:40,097 --> 00:08:41,848
Learn to harness the power.
184
00:08:48,087 --> 00:08:49,553
Sucks.
185
00:08:49,616 --> 00:08:53,152
And most importantly, do
not be afraid to unleash it.
186
00:08:56,247 --> 00:08:58,981
That sucks.
187
00:08:59,083 --> 00:09:00,983
This sucks.
188
00:09:01,085 --> 00:09:03,485
Sucks. Sucks!
189
00:09:03,587 --> 00:09:06,288
This whole neighborhood sucks!
190
00:09:09,026 --> 00:09:11,293
Yes, it does.
191
00:09:11,395 --> 00:09:13,662
It sucks.
192
00:09:13,764 --> 00:09:15,931
You are very special, Liz.
193
00:09:16,033 --> 00:09:17,766
If only Mom and Tom felt that way.
194
00:09:17,791 --> 00:09:22,093
Well, Mom and Tom are like blind worms,
195
00:09:22,273 --> 00:09:23,772
snaking their way through the muck,
196
00:09:23,874 --> 00:09:25,941
bellies dragging in the filth.
197
00:09:26,043 --> 00:09:27,876
Yeah. It's really annoying
198
00:09:27,978 --> 00:09:29,511
how focused they are on Josh's wedding.
199
00:09:29,613 --> 00:09:31,179
That's just like Patti, focusing on
200
00:09:31,282 --> 00:09:34,549
insignificant things,
like marriage and weddings.
201
00:09:34,652 --> 00:09:37,152
I am so glad I got out of there.
202
00:09:37,254 --> 00:09:40,122
- Do you ever regret leaving?
- The only thing I regret
203
00:09:40,224 --> 00:09:41,857
is what I had to leave behind.
204
00:09:41,959 --> 00:09:44,126
You mean me?
205
00:09:44,228 --> 00:09:46,795
Sure. Sure.
206
00:09:46,897 --> 00:09:48,088
But I also left behind
207
00:09:48,113 --> 00:09:49,975
a rare Jean Burdette print at the house.
208
00:09:50,000 --> 00:09:51,447
- Oh.
- And God knows
209
00:09:51,472 --> 00:09:52,664
its worth is lost on Patti.
210
00:09:52,689 --> 00:09:55,281
Her idea of art is those
tacky blankets she knits.
211
00:09:55,306 --> 00:09:58,453
- The ones with the dolphins?
- Mm, yes.
212
00:09:58,478 --> 00:09:59,242
Ugh.
213
00:09:59,267 --> 00:10:00,842
both: They suck.
214
00:10:00,944 --> 00:10:03,545
- [laughs]
- Mom sends me one every year.
215
00:10:03,647 --> 00:10:05,380
A dolphin blanket every year?
216
00:10:05,482 --> 00:10:06,748
Christ, what do you do with all of them?
217
00:10:06,850 --> 00:10:08,383
I shove 'em in the back of the closet.
218
00:10:08,485 --> 00:10:10,018
- [phone trills]
- I'd burn them.
219
00:10:10,120 --> 00:10:12,321
Shit. Listen, I gotta run.
220
00:10:12,423 --> 00:10:14,890
- It's a work thing.
- Oh, no.
221
00:10:14,992 --> 00:10:17,426
You know, I could get
your print back for you.
222
00:10:17,528 --> 00:10:20,028
- Really?
- Yeah, I could go now.
223
00:10:20,130 --> 00:10:22,030
And, uh, we could meet
up in a couple of hours.
224
00:10:22,132 --> 00:10:25,200
Maybe we could get a late
dinner maybe at your club?
225
00:10:25,302 --> 00:10:26,501
Yeah.
226
00:10:26,603 --> 00:10:27,936
- Yeah, I would love that.
- Great.
227
00:10:28,038 --> 00:10:29,037
Mm.
228
00:10:32,209 --> 00:10:34,109
[chuckles]
229
00:10:34,211 --> 00:10:37,546
The super juicer comes with
three removable attachments,
230
00:10:37,648 --> 00:10:40,082
all of which are
completely dishwasher safe.
231
00:10:40,184 --> 00:10:42,017
Oh, hey, Liz.
232
00:10:42,119 --> 00:10:43,489
I'd get up and give you a hug,
233
00:10:43,514 --> 00:10:46,332
but I'm as snug as a
dolphin in a blanket.
234
00:10:46,357 --> 00:10:47,989
As they say. [chuckles]
235
00:10:50,561 --> 00:10:52,627
Oh, Liz, we need help
236
00:10:52,730 --> 00:10:55,297
with the napkin folds
for Josh's wedding.
237
00:10:55,399 --> 00:10:56,932
Now which do you prefer?
238
00:10:57,034 --> 00:11:00,535
The French fold, or the...
239
00:11:00,637 --> 00:11:02,204
Bishop's hat?
240
00:11:02,306 --> 00:11:04,473
They both suck.
241
00:11:04,575 --> 00:11:05,741
Liz!
242
00:11:08,912 --> 00:11:10,312
What are you doing?
243
00:11:10,414 --> 00:11:13,615
Oh, I'm, uh, getting Dad's print.
244
00:11:13,717 --> 00:11:15,005
You saw Joel?
245
00:11:15,030 --> 00:11:17,697
Yeah, I did, and we
had a lot of fun, Mom,
246
00:11:17,988 --> 00:11:20,756
'cause he appreciates
things like cool art,
247
00:11:20,858 --> 00:11:24,493
and having a daughter who made
partner at a major law firm.
248
00:11:24,518 --> 00:11:29,341
Elizabeth, we're very proud
that you get to be manager.
249
00:11:29,366 --> 00:11:30,932
I'm not manager!
250
00:11:31,034 --> 00:11:33,301
I made partner.
251
00:11:33,404 --> 00:11:35,524
I don't work at Foot Locker.
252
00:11:35,635 --> 00:11:37,483
Hey, here's an idea.
253
00:11:37,508 --> 00:11:39,908
Um, why don't we all
go out and celebrate?
254
00:11:40,010 --> 00:11:42,444
We'll go to Pasta Buongiorno.
255
00:11:42,546 --> 00:11:44,446
Liz, they take your picture,
256
00:11:44,548 --> 00:11:48,350
and you get to be the meatballs!
257
00:11:48,452 --> 00:11:49,851
I've got better plans.
258
00:11:49,953 --> 00:11:51,853
Better than Pasta Buongiorno?
259
00:11:51,955 --> 00:11:53,622
[door opens, closes]
260
00:11:53,724 --> 00:11:56,057
But you get to be the meatballs.
261
00:12:01,098 --> 00:12:03,498
Excuse me, miss, are you a member?
262
00:12:03,600 --> 00:12:05,217
My dad is. We're having dinner.
263
00:12:05,242 --> 00:12:07,109
He needs to be present to escort you in.
264
00:12:11,975 --> 00:12:13,608
Okay, sure.
265
00:12:16,380 --> 00:12:17,279
[sighs]
266
00:12:17,381 --> 00:12:19,881
[line trilling]
267
00:12:19,983 --> 00:12:21,983
- Joel Greenberg's office.
- Yeah, this is Liz.
268
00:12:22,085 --> 00:12:24,820
Is my dad on his way?
We have dinner plans.
269
00:12:24,922 --> 00:12:27,956
Right. Joel is gonna
have to cancel.
270
00:12:28,058 --> 00:12:30,659
- Oh.
- Something came up.
271
00:12:30,761 --> 00:12:33,795
Uh, maybe we can just
reschedule for next week then.
272
00:12:33,897 --> 00:12:36,131
- Yeah, next week's no good.
- Of course.
273
00:12:36,233 --> 00:12:37,199
But he did leave
a message for you.
274
00:12:37,301 --> 00:12:39,134
One sec.
275
00:12:39,236 --> 00:12:41,636
He said if you brought
his Jean Burdette print,
276
00:12:41,738 --> 00:12:44,239
to leave it at the
club reception.
277
00:12:44,341 --> 00:12:46,241
I'll tell him you called?
278
00:12:46,343 --> 00:12:48,410
[laughs]
279
00:12:48,822 --> 00:12:50,412
Uh...
280
00:12:50,514 --> 00:12:52,514
Yeah, don't... don't bother.
281
00:13:02,292 --> 00:13:05,193
[poignant music]
282
00:13:15,433 --> 00:13:18,334
[stirring music]
283
00:13:25,003 --> 00:13:28,838
Hi, Mom. Hey, Tom.
284
00:13:28,940 --> 00:13:32,842
I brought you a new print to
replace the one that I took.
285
00:13:32,944 --> 00:13:35,779
It's okay, Liz, you can keep it.
286
00:13:35,881 --> 00:13:39,182
It's like you said. We
don't understand art.
287
00:13:39,284 --> 00:13:42,248
Yeah, we're not fancy
like your dad, so...
288
00:13:44,122 --> 00:13:47,424
Uh, look, I just...
I just want to, um...
289
00:13:47,526 --> 00:13:51,828
I just want to apologize. I
was... I was so rude to you.
290
00:13:51,930 --> 00:13:55,098
You did kinda hurt our feelings.
291
00:13:55,200 --> 00:13:57,333
I know.
292
00:13:57,436 --> 00:13:59,703
Hey, what do you say we
go out to dinner, huh?
293
00:13:59,805 --> 00:14:00,528
My treat.
294
00:14:00,553 --> 00:14:02,587
- Oh, you don't have to do that.
- Oh, no, you don't have to do that, please.
295
00:14:02,612 --> 00:14:04,374
- Please?
- No.
296
00:14:04,476 --> 00:14:07,911
I mean, we could go to Pasta Buongiorno.
297
00:14:09,548 --> 00:14:10,542
I've never been.
298
00:14:10,566 --> 00:14:12,049
both: What?
299
00:14:12,050 --> 00:14:14,692
Pasta Buongiorno? Are you kidding?
300
00:14:14,717 --> 00:14:15,529
No, never been.
301
00:14:15,554 --> 00:14:17,287
Can I have a word with your stomach?
302
00:14:17,389 --> 00:14:18,657
You're in for a treat!
303
00:14:18,682 --> 00:14:20,567
- Pasta Buongiorno!
- You're in for a treat!
304
00:14:20,592 --> 00:14:22,639
Pasta Buongiorno!
305
00:14:23,391 --> 00:14:27,363
This place is the tops.
They make everything fun.
306
00:14:27,466 --> 00:14:30,500
Buongiorno, and welcome
to Pasta Buongiorno.
307
00:14:30,602 --> 00:14:32,869
The only thing hotter than our deals
308
00:14:32,971 --> 00:14:34,304
is our pasta.
309
00:14:34,406 --> 00:14:35,909
Can I get you all anything to start?
310
00:14:35,934 --> 00:14:39,869
Well, we're thinking a
buttered bread bonanza.
311
00:14:39,894 --> 00:14:41,599
Ooh, what is that?
312
00:14:41,624 --> 00:14:43,924
- Tell her all about it.
- We take some bread,
313
00:14:43,949 --> 00:14:45,882
butter it, and keep
serving it in baskets
314
00:14:45,984 --> 00:14:48,184
- until you tell us to stop.
- We'll take one.
315
00:14:48,286 --> 00:14:51,488
And are you still doing
the unlimited sauce tub?
316
00:14:51,590 --> 00:14:52,891
- Yeah.
- What is that?
317
00:14:52,916 --> 00:14:54,217
Tell her all about it.
318
00:14:54,242 --> 00:14:55,836
We serve a mixture of our marinara,
319
00:14:55,861 --> 00:14:57,494
pesto, and alfredo sauces
320
00:14:57,519 --> 00:15:00,407
in one of our collectible
Pastas Buongiorno tubs.
321
00:15:00,432 --> 00:15:04,033
You can take the tub home
with you for five bucks extra.
322
00:15:04,136 --> 00:15:06,503
- I think we gotta get two.
- Well, all right.
323
00:15:06,528 --> 00:15:07,514
- [laughs excitedly]
- All right, we're definitely
324
00:15:07,539 --> 00:15:09,783
gonna be having some wine,
'cause it's not every day
325
00:15:09,808 --> 00:15:12,609
we get Liz down to Pasta Buongiorno.
326
00:15:12,711 --> 00:15:14,744
- So maybe...
- Oh, Liz probably knows
327
00:15:14,846 --> 00:15:17,180
a lot more about wines than we do.
328
00:15:17,282 --> 00:15:20,184
- Sweetie, do you wanna pick?
- You're the regulars.
329
00:15:20,209 --> 00:15:21,720
I just want what you guys would get.
330
00:15:21,745 --> 00:15:23,553
Okay, well, we'll have this one.
331
00:15:23,655 --> 00:15:25,922
- It's our favorite.
- Now how do you say it again?
332
00:15:26,024 --> 00:15:27,482
Yak piss.
333
00:15:28,678 --> 00:15:32,546
Oh, wait, is it ya...
uh, yak... yakpiz??
334
00:15:32,798 --> 00:15:35,431
- What it... what... what is it?
- Tell her all about it!
335
00:15:35,534 --> 00:15:36,966
Gus! Table 14.
336
00:15:37,068 --> 00:15:40,069
[yak grunts and chuffs]
337
00:15:42,295 --> 00:15:43,638
So the yak drinks water.
338
00:15:43,663 --> 00:15:46,039
That water is then
transported into his stomach,
339
00:15:46,064 --> 00:15:48,197
where his body processes it into waste.
340
00:15:48,222 --> 00:15:50,868
The liquid waste then comes
out of the yak's penis hole
341
00:15:50,893 --> 00:15:52,081
in the form of urine,
342
00:15:52,184 --> 00:15:54,050
and we ladle it out into your glass.
343
00:15:54,075 --> 00:15:56,129
Just like in Italy.
344
00:15:56,855 --> 00:15:59,289
Just...
345
00:15:59,391 --> 00:16:00,290
Mmm.
346
00:16:00,315 --> 00:16:01,314
May I?
347
00:16:05,597 --> 00:16:07,564
[yak grunts and chuffs]
348
00:16:07,666 --> 00:16:09,566
Did I pick the wrong kind?
349
00:16:09,668 --> 00:16:12,569
[Italian music playing]
350
00:16:14,231 --> 00:16:15,458
It's fine.
351
00:16:15,483 --> 00:16:18,550
We're gonna get a whole
bucket of that yak piss.
352
00:16:19,031 --> 00:16:20,297
To Josh's wedding.
353
00:16:20,322 --> 00:16:23,089
No, to Liz,
354
00:16:23,448 --> 00:16:26,149
for making partner.
355
00:16:26,500 --> 00:16:28,166
Did I say that right?
356
00:16:28,243 --> 00:16:29,639
You got it, Mom.
357
00:16:30,555 --> 00:16:32,989
Cheers.
358
00:16:33,091 --> 00:16:34,824
Warm tonight.
359
00:16:34,926 --> 00:16:36,926
- It is, it's lovely.
- So warm.
360
00:16:37,028 --> 00:16:38,962
A grainy kinda...
361
00:16:39,265 --> 00:16:41,061
- Yes, a little...
- You feeling that grain? That grit?
362
00:16:41,086 --> 00:16:43,024
- Yes, there is a grit to it.
- Yeah.
363
00:16:43,049 --> 00:16:45,009
- Mmm.
- [yak grunts and chuffs]
364
00:16:45,570 --> 00:16:47,470
[poignant music]
365
00:16:47,572 --> 00:16:48,705
See ya.
366
00:16:51,951 --> 00:16:55,979
Hope you enjoyed your
Pasta Buongiorno experience.
367
00:16:56,335 --> 00:16:59,182
You seem to really get
along with your mom and dad.
368
00:16:59,284 --> 00:17:01,184
Well, he's my step, uh...
369
00:17:04,746 --> 00:17:06,826
Yeah, they're really great.
370
00:17:09,226 --> 00:17:11,281
Ooh.
371
00:17:11,673 --> 00:17:13,573
Yeah, I think those
doilies are great, Mom.
372
00:17:13,675 --> 00:17:15,724
Aw, you really think so, Liz?
373
00:17:15,749 --> 00:17:17,911
Yeah, Josh and
Lucy will love 'em.
374
00:17:18,013 --> 00:17:19,379
- [door knocks]
- Oh, I-I gotta run.
375
00:17:19,481 --> 00:17:20,826
I'll talk to you later, okay?
376
00:17:20,851 --> 00:17:23,272
Love you very much. Bye.
377
00:17:23,670 --> 00:17:25,385
Good afternoon, Liz.
378
00:17:25,487 --> 00:17:28,255
As you know, you've ingested
a large quantity of yak urine.
379
00:17:28,357 --> 00:17:31,258
- Am I gonna be all right?
- I'm not gonna sugarcoat this.
380
00:17:31,518 --> 00:17:33,760
That yak you drank from
was clearly mistreated.
381
00:17:33,862 --> 00:17:34,886
- [groans]
- And he opened you up
382
00:17:34,911 --> 00:17:36,897
to a whole host of problems.
383
00:17:37,137 --> 00:17:39,276
Are you familiar with a tapeworm?
384
00:17:39,301 --> 00:17:41,148
Mm-hmm. Yeah, my dog... yep.
385
00:17:41,173 --> 00:17:44,024
Yeah, well, then from that,
you can probably extrapolate
386
00:17:44,049 --> 00:17:46,373
what it means to have a tape-snake.
387
00:17:46,640 --> 00:17:48,375
- Wow.
- You have a tape-snake.
388
00:17:48,477 --> 00:17:50,110
- He's there.
- I don't feel it.
389
00:17:50,212 --> 00:17:51,611
Well, when you're asleep, he's awake.
390
00:17:51,713 --> 00:17:54,427
- Where?
- All around you inside.
391
00:17:54,646 --> 00:17:55,594
[sighs]
392
00:17:55,619 --> 00:17:57,268
You're gonna be here an awful long time,
393
00:17:57,293 --> 00:18:00,057
so I would say, why don't
you make yourself at home?
394
00:18:00,135 --> 00:18:02,823
[Rogue Wave's "Falling"]
395
00:18:08,627 --> 00:18:13,627
Synced and corrected by Octavia
- www.addic7ed.com -
396
00:18:13,677 --> 00:18:18,227
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