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1
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(PHONE RINGING)
2
00:00:08,234 --> 00:00:10,067
PAUL: Hi, we're out.Leave a messageand we'll call you back.
3
00:00:10,133 --> 00:00:11,534
(BEEPING)
4
00:00:11,601 --> 00:00:14,200
JAMIE: Honey, it's me.Are you there? Are you there?
5
00:00:14,267 --> 00:00:16,534
Yes, yes, I'm here.
Hang on one second.
6
00:00:16,601 --> 00:00:17,834
Debbie and Jimwant us to come over
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00:00:17,901 --> 00:00:19,767
and look attheir wedding video.
8
00:00:19,834 --> 00:00:21,334
You never saw me.
9
00:00:21,400 --> 00:00:22,601
JAMIE: Are you there?
10
00:00:31,667 --> 00:00:33,634
Fold the ends like a flag?
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Whatever the hell that means.
12
00:00:35,234 --> 00:00:36,334
(DOOR SHUTTING)
13
00:00:36,400 --> 00:00:38,100
Oh, no. Hello?
PAUL: Hi.
14
00:00:38,167 --> 00:00:40,534
Thank God. I thought you
might be your parents.
15
00:00:40,601 --> 00:00:43,501
Boy, you think
that scares you?
16
00:00:43,567 --> 00:00:45,567
So, how did they go?
Good, I think.
17
00:00:45,634 --> 00:00:47,400
I hope. I don't know.
I just...
18
00:00:47,467 --> 00:00:49,701
I figure three interviews
in one day, I got to get one, right?
19
00:00:49,767 --> 00:00:50,934
I mean, just
law of averages.
20
00:00:51,033 --> 00:00:53,234
Your agent called.
What did he say?
21
00:00:53,300 --> 00:00:56,901
That he called.
Did you ever fold a flag?
22
00:00:56,968 --> 00:00:58,467
Once. I don't like
to talk about it.
23
00:00:59,868 --> 00:01:01,000
What are you doing?
24
00:01:01,067 --> 00:01:03,734
I'm making Chinese food.
Why?
25
00:01:03,801 --> 00:01:05,167
'Cause your parents
love Chinese food.
26
00:01:05,234 --> 00:01:06,534
So why don't we
just order in?
27
00:01:06,601 --> 00:01:07,801
Because, did you see
Empire's new menu?
28
00:01:07,868 --> 00:01:09,067
They raised
the prices again.
29
00:01:09,133 --> 00:01:11,534
(EXCLAIMING) So, what,
this is, like, cheaper?
30
00:01:11,601 --> 00:01:14,067
I thought it was
when I started.
31
00:01:14,133 --> 00:01:15,467
I really wish you
would just stop worrying
32
00:01:15,534 --> 00:01:17,267
about the money, please.
33
00:01:17,334 --> 00:01:19,534
Meanwhile,
you're killing yourself trying to find something.
34
00:01:19,601 --> 00:01:21,634
I'm-- I'm working.
It's what people do.
35
00:01:21,701 --> 00:01:23,534
WOMAN ON PHONE:Artist Talent Agency.
36
00:01:23,601 --> 00:01:25,567
Carol, Paul Buchman.
How you doing? Returning his call.
37
00:01:25,634 --> 00:01:27,133
Okay. Thank you.
38
00:01:27,200 --> 00:01:29,033
She put me through to his car.
39
00:01:29,100 --> 00:01:31,634
That's a good sign, right?
Putting me through to his car?
40
00:01:31,701 --> 00:01:34,100
Nobody delivers bad news
from a moving vehicle.
41
00:01:34,167 --> 00:01:36,133
Why not?
42
00:01:36,200 --> 00:01:38,767
I just made it up.
Go with me.
43
00:01:38,834 --> 00:01:42,634
David, hi. How you doing?
Yeah. Good, good, good. I'm good.
44
00:01:42,701 --> 00:01:44,868
Very good. Thank you.
So what-- So what's up?
45
00:01:44,934 --> 00:01:46,667
Got one.
I told you.
46
00:01:46,734 --> 00:01:48,734
Actually, you didn't,
but thank you.
47
00:01:48,801 --> 00:01:51,634
Which, uh... So which one?
The Harvey Keitel thing?
48
00:01:51,701 --> 00:01:54,100
Or, what, the soap opera,
or... Hello?
49
00:01:54,167 --> 00:01:55,968
Hey! I got cut off.
50
00:01:56,033 --> 00:01:57,234
That's all right.
He'll call back.
51
00:01:57,300 --> 00:01:58,400
(SCOFFS)
52
00:01:58,467 --> 00:02:00,534
I'm giving the man
10 percent of my salary
53
00:02:00,601 --> 00:02:02,834
and he's driving
through tunnels.
54
00:02:02,901 --> 00:02:06,267
Did you know
there's no lobster in lobster sauce?
55
00:02:06,334 --> 00:02:08,534
Do you think
maybe you're overdoing this a little bit here?
56
00:02:08,601 --> 00:02:10,334
So what?
So...
57
00:02:10,400 --> 00:02:11,601
A, you're not Chinese.
58
00:02:11,667 --> 00:02:12,968
And two, don't you
have schoolwork to do?
59
00:02:13,033 --> 00:02:14,901
I did it.
So do some more.
60
00:02:14,968 --> 00:02:16,200
I did it all.
I see.
61
00:02:16,267 --> 00:02:19,601
Seriously,
I did all my reading for the whole semester.
62
00:02:19,667 --> 00:02:22,868
So everything
that there possibly could be to know, you know?
63
00:02:22,934 --> 00:02:25,133
Except how to
fold a flag, yes.
64
00:02:25,200 --> 00:02:26,601
All right,
so if you know so much, tell me,
65
00:02:26,667 --> 00:02:28,634
when is this guy
going to call me back? He will.
66
00:02:28,701 --> 00:02:29,968
(PHONE RINGING)
67
00:02:30,033 --> 00:02:31,200
Oh, stop it.
68
00:02:33,534 --> 00:02:35,000
David. Yes, how you doing?
69
00:02:35,067 --> 00:02:38,534
Okay. No, please,
you got to get to Jersey somehow.
70
00:02:38,601 --> 00:02:41,000
So, you were saying,
which one of the three...
71
00:02:41,067 --> 00:02:43,901
Oh, good. That's good.
72
00:02:43,968 --> 00:02:45,634
No. Fine.
Tomorrow is good.
73
00:02:45,701 --> 00:02:47,400
Thank you.
All right. Thanks. Bye.
74
00:02:49,267 --> 00:02:51,100
So, come on,
which one did you get?
75
00:02:51,167 --> 00:02:52,767
I would like you to guess.
76
00:02:52,834 --> 00:02:54,300
The independent
film with Harvey Keitel! No!
77
00:02:56,200 --> 00:02:59,033
All right, the soap opera.
But TV for directors. This is...
78
00:03:00,901 --> 00:03:03,000
That thing they show you
when you get on the airplane
79
00:03:03,067 --> 00:03:04,634
about how to buckle up
and find the exit
80
00:03:04,701 --> 00:03:08,067
and don't inflate your vest
till you get outside the plane.
81
00:03:08,133 --> 00:03:09,467
Bingo!
Yay!
82
00:03:14,968 --> 00:03:16,367
Who wants more? Sylvia?
83
00:03:16,434 --> 00:03:17,968
Thanks, honey.
It's a little oriental for me.
84
00:03:23,634 --> 00:03:25,534
It's great.
Thank you.
85
00:03:25,601 --> 00:03:27,467
Is it on yet?
Not yet.
86
00:03:27,534 --> 00:03:29,033
Tell us when it's on.
I will.
87
00:03:29,100 --> 00:03:30,968
Dad, relax.
It's within walking distance.
88
00:03:31,033 --> 00:03:33,133
How often is your father's
commercial on TV?
89
00:03:33,200 --> 00:03:34,467
Once a year.
Once a year.
90
00:03:34,534 --> 00:03:37,434
Just for the sale.
Just for the sale.
91
00:03:37,501 --> 00:03:39,868
I hope you're going to
be there to help out. I am.
92
00:03:39,934 --> 00:03:42,701
It's the one
day a year I ask. It's gonna kill you?
93
00:03:42,767 --> 00:03:44,434
What did I just say?
I am. I'll be there.
94
00:03:44,501 --> 00:03:46,934
Who said you wouldn't?
Is it on yet?
95
00:03:47,000 --> 00:03:48,167
Not yet.
96
00:03:50,100 --> 00:03:52,200
I still don't understand
why you wouldn't take me up on my offer.
97
00:03:52,267 --> 00:03:54,767
I have let Morty
shoot my commercials for 20 years.
98
00:03:54,834 --> 00:03:56,567
What am I going to say?
"My son is a director now.
99
00:03:56,634 --> 00:03:58,033
"Go lie down in the cemetery."
100
00:03:59,634 --> 00:04:01,300
I'm just saying...
What? You need the money?
101
00:04:01,367 --> 00:04:02,934
No, no, no.
102
00:04:03,000 --> 00:04:04,968
Because if things get slow,
remember there's always the store.
103
00:04:05,033 --> 00:04:07,000
We're doing fine.
In fact, Paul is starting a new job tomorrow.
104
00:04:07,067 --> 00:04:08,367
Okay. Please.
105
00:04:08,434 --> 00:04:10,167
What? You got that
Harvey Keitel thing?
106
00:04:11,701 --> 00:04:13,634
Actually, the Harvey Keitel,
they went with somebody else.
107
00:04:13,701 --> 00:04:15,467
Good.
I don't care for his penis.
108
00:04:20,801 --> 00:04:22,100
(STAMMERING)
What does that mean?
109
00:04:22,167 --> 00:04:24,701
Well, in The Piano,
it was so unnecessary.
110
00:04:24,767 --> 00:04:26,634
What, you liked it?
Mmm-mmm.
111
00:04:27,467 --> 00:04:28,868
Yes, you did.
112
00:04:28,934 --> 00:04:30,133
(MAN SPEAKING ON TV)
113
00:04:30,200 --> 00:04:31,701
Hey, it's on.
114
00:04:31,767 --> 00:04:34,334
Why didn't you tell us? Quick!
Get to your seats.
115
00:04:34,400 --> 00:04:35,968
(SHUSHING)
116
00:04:36,033 --> 00:04:37,467
MAN ON TV: That's Buchman'sSporting Goods,
117
00:04:37,534 --> 00:04:40,400
where we've got everything foryour sporting goods needs.
118
00:04:40,467 --> 00:04:42,234
Hello, I'm Burt Buchman.
119
00:04:42,300 --> 00:04:44,167
Owner of Buchman'sSporting Goods,
120
00:04:44,234 --> 00:04:47,300
where we got everything foryour sporting goods needs.
121
00:04:47,367 --> 00:04:48,734
Do you have sneakers?
122
00:04:48,801 --> 00:04:50,300
We have sneakers,so run on down.
123
00:04:50,367 --> 00:04:51,534
You got fishing equipment?
124
00:04:51,601 --> 00:04:53,767
We have rods and reelsto lure you in.
125
00:04:53,834 --> 00:04:55,100
Do you have bats?
126
00:04:55,167 --> 00:04:57,167
Bats? I must have batsin the belfry
127
00:04:57,234 --> 00:04:59,400
to be giving thingsaway at these prices.
128
00:04:59,467 --> 00:05:03,000
Right here atBuchman's Sporting Goods'Midnight Madness Sale.
129
00:05:03,067 --> 00:05:05,534
Remember, that'sBuchman's Sporting Goods,
130
00:05:05,601 --> 00:05:08,534
where we got everything.Fore!
131
00:05:08,601 --> 00:05:10,567
Your sporting goods needs.
132
00:05:13,834 --> 00:05:15,300
So what do you think?
133
00:05:15,367 --> 00:05:16,534
(WHIMPERS)
134
00:05:24,234 --> 00:05:25,667
Do we have any floss?
135
00:05:25,734 --> 00:05:28,334
We have floss to
pick your teeth to savings.
136
00:05:28,400 --> 00:05:30,267
Leave Dad alone.
137
00:05:30,334 --> 00:05:32,534
We have no floss.
What are you doing?
138
00:05:32,601 --> 00:05:34,033
What?
Put the glasses on.
139
00:05:34,100 --> 00:05:35,300
I'm fine.
Yeah, all right.
140
00:05:35,367 --> 00:05:37,534
Do me a favor, hold this up.
For what?
141
00:05:37,601 --> 00:05:39,400
Just like you're
a stewardess or something.
142
00:05:39,467 --> 00:05:41,267
Are we gonna
do something dirty?
143
00:05:41,334 --> 00:05:43,434
For the film, for the film.
144
00:05:43,501 --> 00:05:46,467
Did you know that
48 percent of all women 18 to 34
145
00:05:46,534 --> 00:05:49,868
buy at least one major piece
of exercise equipment every year?
146
00:05:49,934 --> 00:05:51,701
What are you reading, there?
Some stuff I looked up.
147
00:05:51,767 --> 00:05:53,801
I thought I'd
help your father out with his sale.
148
00:05:53,868 --> 00:05:55,234
You know, do a little PR
or something.
149
00:05:55,300 --> 00:05:57,934
Why?
Why not? It's what I do.
150
00:05:58,000 --> 00:05:59,334
No, no, it's what you did.
151
00:05:59,400 --> 00:06:00,901
Now you're in school.
152
00:06:00,968 --> 00:06:02,534
Wow, you would not believe
the number of people
153
00:06:02,601 --> 00:06:04,467
who own their own
bowling shoes.
154
00:06:04,534 --> 00:06:06,033
Hey.
155
00:06:06,100 --> 00:06:08,434
I can do both.
I'm just gonna set up a mailing,
156
00:06:08,501 --> 00:06:10,033
maybe place
a few articles in the paper,
157
00:06:10,100 --> 00:06:13,033
get somebody to
name a sandwich after him.
158
00:06:13,100 --> 00:06:14,634
You can do that?
I've done it.
159
00:06:15,968 --> 00:06:17,367
Maybe a slogan?
160
00:06:17,434 --> 00:06:18,868
What kind of slogan?
161
00:06:18,934 --> 00:06:20,601
I don't know.
What rhymes with sports?
162
00:06:20,667 --> 00:06:22,634
Okay. You know what?
It's impossible to make seat belts interesting.
163
00:06:22,701 --> 00:06:24,234
It will be interesting.
164
00:06:24,300 --> 00:06:26,167
Yeah, that's why they have
all those blockbusters out there.
165
00:06:26,234 --> 00:06:28,801
You know, The Good, the Badand the Seat Belts.
166
00:06:28,868 --> 00:06:30,567
Robin Hood,Prince of Seat Belts.
167
00:06:30,634 --> 00:06:31,701
All right.
168
00:06:31,767 --> 00:06:33,100
Seat Belt Gump.
Fine.
169
00:06:34,334 --> 00:06:35,934
What rhymes with tetherball?
170
00:06:36,000 --> 00:06:37,767
Seat Belts in Seattle,
for example.
171
00:06:40,067 --> 00:06:42,033
I'm not upset though.
You know why?
172
00:06:42,100 --> 00:06:43,667
There'll
always be the store.
173
00:06:43,734 --> 00:06:44,968
It's going to happen,
you know.
174
00:06:45,033 --> 00:06:46,634
What?
You.
175
00:06:46,701 --> 00:06:48,033
I know, I know, I know.
Do you?
176
00:06:48,100 --> 00:06:49,434
Yes, yes, yes.
177
00:06:49,501 --> 00:06:51,334
How about a baseball player?
178
00:06:51,400 --> 00:06:53,467
Ha! Unfortunately,
I don't have the arm.
179
00:06:53,534 --> 00:06:54,868
I mean for the sale.
180
00:06:54,934 --> 00:06:56,300
I thought I could
get a celebrity in there.
181
00:06:56,367 --> 00:06:58,534
Get him to sign a few balls,
bring people in.
182
00:06:58,601 --> 00:07:00,234
Do you know Mickey Mantle?
183
00:07:01,834 --> 00:07:05,133
Yes, I do and I've
decided to not tell you.
184
00:07:05,200 --> 00:07:07,000
Who is the greatest
baseball player that's ever lived
185
00:07:07,067 --> 00:07:09,400
that I can get really,
really cheap?
186
00:07:09,467 --> 00:07:11,634
That would be Sloopy Dunbar.
187
00:07:12,534 --> 00:07:14,300
Don't make fun of me.
188
00:07:14,367 --> 00:07:18,000
Sloopy Dunbar, actual guy.
Sloopy Dunbar played for the Yankees, '59 to '68.
189
00:07:18,067 --> 00:07:19,667
His name was Sloopy?
190
00:07:19,734 --> 00:07:21,834
No, his name was Rocky.
They called him Sloopy.
191
00:07:21,901 --> 00:07:24,567
Oh, I see.
Yeah.
192
00:07:24,634 --> 00:07:27,968
Do you know, my father
took me to the third game of the World Series, 1964.
193
00:07:28,033 --> 00:07:29,667
Your dad took you
to ball games?
194
00:07:29,734 --> 00:07:31,868
'64 once and... Yeah.
Oh, yeah. We always used to go.
195
00:07:31,934 --> 00:07:33,534
He used to sit there
the whole time. He would just...
196
00:07:33,601 --> 00:07:37,000
He would try and, like,
guess the gross markup on the equipment.
197
00:07:37,067 --> 00:07:38,501
And I had my little
Brownie Instamatic.
198
00:07:38,567 --> 00:07:40,567
I'm trying to get
the best angle on the field.
199
00:07:40,634 --> 00:07:42,434
I don't know why,
but that time,
200
00:07:42,501 --> 00:07:44,000
after a couple of innings,
I put away my camera
201
00:07:44,067 --> 00:07:45,834
and he put away his stuff
and we just sat there,
202
00:07:45,901 --> 00:07:48,534
my dad and I,
and we watched the game.
203
00:07:48,601 --> 00:07:50,601
And Sloopy Dunbar
hit this line drive,
204
00:07:50,667 --> 00:07:53,767
came right--right at me,
and I just... Oh, wow!
205
00:07:55,701 --> 00:07:56,968
What rhymes with Sloopy?
206
00:07:57,033 --> 00:07:58,200
Oh, everything.
207
00:08:04,334 --> 00:08:05,567
I worked up three
different layouts
208
00:08:05,634 --> 00:08:06,834
so you could pick out
which one you like.
209
00:08:06,901 --> 00:08:08,400
Which one do you like?
210
00:08:08,467 --> 00:08:10,501
The first one.
So go with that.
211
00:08:10,567 --> 00:08:12,434
Don't you want to
see the others? Why?
212
00:08:12,501 --> 00:08:14,834
You should have options.
Why?
213
00:08:14,901 --> 00:08:17,367
My boss always
made me do three. Why?
214
00:08:18,501 --> 00:08:21,133
I don't know.
215
00:08:21,200 --> 00:08:23,901
Look, I hate to see
you knock yourself out like this.
216
00:08:23,968 --> 00:08:25,067
Let me give you
a couple bucks.
217
00:08:25,133 --> 00:08:26,801
Burt, I'm fine.
You're a starving student.
218
00:08:26,868 --> 00:08:27,968
I'm not starving.
219
00:08:28,033 --> 00:08:29,534
Get her
something to eat.
220
00:08:29,601 --> 00:08:31,467
Burt, please stop.
I don't need anything. We're doing fine.
221
00:08:31,534 --> 00:08:34,267
Come on, I know
things have been slow for Paulie lately.
222
00:08:34,334 --> 00:08:35,567
They were. They're fine now.
223
00:08:35,634 --> 00:08:36,968
Well, look, there's always
the store, you know.
224
00:08:37,033 --> 00:08:39,100
Please,
we're doing just fine.
225
00:08:39,167 --> 00:08:40,801
Besides,
Paul starts his movie today.
226
00:08:40,868 --> 00:08:43,701
Is it good?
He's really excited about it.
227
00:08:43,767 --> 00:08:46,267
So, you did
Death of a Salesman on Broadway,
228
00:08:46,334 --> 00:08:47,667
Shakespeare in the Park?
229
00:08:47,734 --> 00:08:49,601
Terrific. Great. Okay.
230
00:08:49,667 --> 00:08:53,901
So you know the part.
Whenever you're ready. And, action.
231
00:09:00,067 --> 00:09:02,200
Very nice. Good, thank you.
Next?
232
00:09:13,868 --> 00:09:16,133
Come here. Help me out.
233
00:09:16,200 --> 00:09:17,334
Lick that.
234
00:09:22,968 --> 00:09:24,300
Hi.
235
00:09:24,367 --> 00:09:25,601
Hey, hi. Question.
236
00:09:25,667 --> 00:09:27,334
Did we ever buy any floss?
No.
237
00:09:27,400 --> 00:09:30,167
I got a thing in my tooth
that's killing me.
238
00:09:30,234 --> 00:09:32,534
A piece of pretzel
the size of a human lung.
239
00:09:37,667 --> 00:09:38,701
What is all this stuff?
240
00:09:38,767 --> 00:09:41,434
It's for your dad's sale.
241
00:09:41,501 --> 00:09:42,601
Why is he asking you
to do all this...
242
00:09:42,667 --> 00:09:45,067
He's not asking.
I volunteered.
243
00:09:45,133 --> 00:09:46,300
Gee, how much did
all this cost?
244
00:09:46,367 --> 00:09:48,601
Nothing.
I worked the neighborhood.
245
00:09:48,667 --> 00:09:49,834
I don't know what that means.
246
00:09:49,901 --> 00:09:51,534
I'm writing press releases
for the copy store.
247
00:09:51,601 --> 00:09:54,067
I traded three promo ideas
for the envelopes.
248
00:09:54,133 --> 00:09:56,667
And I'm baby-sitting
the mailman's kid for the stamps.
249
00:09:58,000 --> 00:09:59,400
Do you want
hamburgers for dinner?
250
00:09:59,467 --> 00:10:01,300
What, you gonna
slaughter a cow in your spare time?
251
00:10:03,868 --> 00:10:05,567
Do we have toothpicks?
No.
252
00:10:05,634 --> 00:10:08,300
I tell you,
this thing is like a boulder. Give me that.
253
00:10:08,367 --> 00:10:09,734
What is the matter with you?
Nothing.
254
00:10:09,801 --> 00:10:11,534
It's just, you know,
it's bad etiquette.
255
00:10:11,601 --> 00:10:13,033
Bad etiquette?
It's you and me and Murray.
256
00:10:13,100 --> 00:10:14,400
So?
Who is he going to tell?
257
00:10:14,467 --> 00:10:15,834
Just forget it.
What is that?
258
00:10:15,901 --> 00:10:17,934
It's nothing.
What is... Can I please see this?
259
00:10:18,033 --> 00:10:19,667
"Jaime Buchman,
public relations."
260
00:10:19,734 --> 00:10:21,901
Oh, yeah. That's right.
I opened my own business today.
261
00:10:21,968 --> 00:10:23,467
I'm gonna go buy
you some floss.
262
00:10:24,667 --> 00:10:26,968
What happened to, like,
going to school?
263
00:10:27,033 --> 00:10:28,400
I can do both.
How?
264
00:10:28,467 --> 00:10:29,734
I just can.
How?
265
00:10:29,801 --> 00:10:30,934
I just can.
266
00:10:33,534 --> 00:10:36,000
You hated PR.
I loved PR.
267
00:10:36,067 --> 00:10:37,901
Yeah, you loved it so much
that you had to quit?
268
00:10:37,968 --> 00:10:39,167
This is gonna be different.
269
00:10:39,234 --> 00:10:40,267
BOTH: How?
270
00:10:40,334 --> 00:10:43,968
Because... Because now
I'm working for myself.
271
00:10:44,033 --> 00:10:45,667
Ever since I've
been doing this stuff for your father,
272
00:10:45,734 --> 00:10:48,834
all of these ideas,
all these parts of me were just there again.
273
00:10:48,901 --> 00:10:50,334
Only they were so
much better
274
00:10:50,400 --> 00:10:52,467
'cause I didn't have to
filter them through 16 idiots
275
00:10:52,534 --> 00:10:54,467
before I could use them.
276
00:10:54,534 --> 00:10:56,434
Well, do you think I don't
know what you're doing?
277
00:10:56,501 --> 00:10:58,133
What?
278
00:10:58,200 --> 00:10:59,734
You're worried
about the money. What, like you have to cover for me?
279
00:10:59,801 --> 00:11:01,133
Oh! I knew
you would think that!
280
00:11:01,200 --> 00:11:03,834
Because it's true.
No, because you think things.
281
00:11:03,901 --> 00:11:06,200
Hey, I only think things
that are there to think.
282
00:11:06,267 --> 00:11:08,133
No, you think up things
to think.
283
00:11:08,200 --> 00:11:11,467
I think up things to think,
because they are there to be thought.
284
00:11:11,534 --> 00:11:13,501
My head's gonna explode.
285
00:11:13,567 --> 00:11:14,701
You don't have to do this.
286
00:11:14,767 --> 00:11:16,534
What if I want to?
Is that okay?
287
00:11:16,601 --> 00:11:17,968
Are you asking me?
No.
288
00:11:20,300 --> 00:11:22,334
Here's the deal.
If you are doing it for me, no.
289
00:11:22,400 --> 00:11:23,634
I will take care of me.
290
00:11:23,701 --> 00:11:26,000
If you're doing it for us,
I will take care of us.
291
00:11:26,067 --> 00:11:28,033
If you are doing
it for you, okay.
292
00:11:28,100 --> 00:11:30,501
I'm doing it for me.
293
00:11:30,567 --> 00:11:32,033
What, 'cause,
like, I don't count?
294
00:11:45,133 --> 00:11:46,767
Fran, keep an eye on the door
and take care of Sloopy
295
00:11:46,834 --> 00:11:48,300
when he gets here.
Got it.
296
00:11:48,367 --> 00:11:50,634
Lisa, don't eat
while you demonstrate the equipment.
297
00:11:50,701 --> 00:11:51,701
Cool.
298
00:11:52,801 --> 00:11:54,634
And, Sylvia?
What, honey?
299
00:11:54,701 --> 00:11:57,734
You just do
whatever you want.
300
00:11:57,801 --> 00:12:00,501
Paulie, come on,
get me with Sloopy.
301
00:12:00,567 --> 00:12:03,167
Pop, the guy himself is gonna
be here in two minutes.
302
00:12:03,234 --> 00:12:04,667
That's what I'm saying. Hurry.
303
00:12:06,968 --> 00:12:08,000
Here we go.
304
00:12:08,067 --> 00:12:10,000
(CAMERA SHUTTER CLICKS)
305
00:12:10,067 --> 00:12:11,634
I think it's a good idea
if we all wear some of the equipment.
306
00:12:11,701 --> 00:12:13,634
You know, kind of
create an image.
307
00:12:13,701 --> 00:12:16,300
Burt, those sneakers...
Oh, good luck.
308
00:12:16,367 --> 00:12:18,100
Do you know how long
I had these sneakers?
309
00:12:18,167 --> 00:12:19,167
BOTH: Twenty years.
310
00:12:19,234 --> 00:12:20,167
Twenty years.
311
00:12:21,234 --> 00:12:23,234
For me?
312
00:12:23,300 --> 00:12:25,567
All right.
How did you do that?
313
00:12:25,634 --> 00:12:27,100
You guys know
what you're doing?
314
00:12:27,167 --> 00:12:29,000
(SLURRING) Uh, you know
what you're doing?
315
00:12:29,067 --> 00:12:30,367
(SLURRING) I don't know.
You know? I don't know what I'm doing.
316
00:12:30,434 --> 00:12:31,701
All right, all right,
all right.
317
00:12:31,767 --> 00:12:33,501
You two guys,
quit horsing around.
318
00:12:33,567 --> 00:12:34,801
Do you know what
you're doing or not?
319
00:12:34,868 --> 00:12:36,400
Pop, I should think so.
320
00:12:36,467 --> 00:12:38,534
You know, I've only been
training for this job since I'm six.
321
00:12:38,601 --> 00:12:40,734
Well, it's something
you should know.
322
00:12:40,801 --> 00:12:42,567
Dad...
Whoa! Whoa! Whoa! It's almost midnight.
323
00:12:42,634 --> 00:12:44,601
Okay, Lisa,
get on the equipment.
324
00:12:44,667 --> 00:12:45,868
Burt, hurry and lace up.
325
00:12:45,934 --> 00:12:47,334
You two get on the floor.
And, Sylvia...
326
00:12:47,400 --> 00:12:49,033
What, honey?
(STAMMERING) Uh, you're good.
327
00:12:51,501 --> 00:12:56,133
Ready? Three, two, one.
328
00:13:05,200 --> 00:13:06,567
I might be a little fast.
329
00:13:08,734 --> 00:13:12,167
I hate Sloopy Dunbar.
He's 20 minutes late
330
00:13:12,234 --> 00:13:13,501
I can't find him anywhere.
331
00:13:13,567 --> 00:13:14,834
You know what?
332
00:13:14,901 --> 00:13:17,100
I love these sneakers.
I can't even tell I'm walking.
333
00:13:17,167 --> 00:13:19,033
I was in the stock room,
now I'm here.
334
00:13:19,100 --> 00:13:21,067
All I remember is
shelves going by.
335
00:13:21,133 --> 00:13:22,167
(DOOR CHIMES RINGING)
336
00:13:22,234 --> 00:13:24,467
Paul, a live one.
Ten seconds?
337
00:13:24,534 --> 00:13:26,367
Give me five.
Got it.
338
00:13:26,434 --> 00:13:28,501
Hey, hey, that's the one that
I would have picked.
339
00:13:28,567 --> 00:13:29,834
Oh, yeah, well,
I'm just looking.
340
00:13:29,901 --> 00:13:31,033
And I'm just talking.
341
00:13:31,100 --> 00:13:32,467
But it is a beauty, though,
isn't it?
342
00:13:32,534 --> 00:13:33,834
Yup, that's the one.
Thank you.
343
00:13:33,901 --> 00:13:35,334
Wait, what are you doing?
What are you doing?
344
00:13:35,400 --> 00:13:37,267
I got three calls on this one.
What is it? 25 percent off?
345
00:13:37,334 --> 00:13:38,667
No it's 30.
But it's already taken.
346
00:13:38,734 --> 00:13:40,000
Yeah, by me.
347
00:13:40,067 --> 00:13:41,801
Listen, I'm really sorry.
That's not fair.
348
00:13:41,868 --> 00:13:44,100
All right, all right.
Come on, I'll ring you up.
349
00:13:44,167 --> 00:13:46,033
Hey, I love these sneakers.
350
00:13:46,100 --> 00:13:48,000
Yes, we heard
about the sneakers.
351
00:13:48,067 --> 00:13:50,234
Hey, look at that total.
It's not even 2:00 yet.
352
00:13:50,300 --> 00:13:52,334
We're gonna go out of
here with a bang.
353
00:13:52,400 --> 00:13:53,534
You're going out of here
with a...
354
00:13:53,601 --> 00:13:55,033
What do you mean going?
Where are you going?
355
00:13:55,100 --> 00:13:56,367
You didn't tell him?
356
00:13:56,434 --> 00:13:58,234
You told me
you'd tell him.
357
00:13:58,300 --> 00:14:00,434
Well, why don't you tell me,
and then I'll tell him.
358
00:14:00,501 --> 00:14:03,868
Paulie, this is gonna be
my last sale.
359
00:14:03,934 --> 00:14:05,000
What are you talking about?
360
00:14:05,067 --> 00:14:07,234
I mean, I'm thinking of
maybe retiring.
361
00:14:07,934 --> 00:14:08,968
You're retiring.
362
00:14:09,033 --> 00:14:10,901
Why is that so hard to say?
363
00:14:10,968 --> 00:14:13,467
Who said it's hard to say?
I'm retiring. There.
364
00:14:13,534 --> 00:14:15,667
Maybe.
Are you serious?
365
00:14:15,734 --> 00:14:18,167
We think it's time,
and I agree.
366
00:14:18,234 --> 00:14:19,901
Forty-three years
in sporting goods.
367
00:14:19,968 --> 00:14:22,167
It's time for
the next generation to step in.
368
00:14:22,234 --> 00:14:24,400
Hey, you know
what I'm saying?
369
00:14:24,467 --> 00:14:27,501
Yeah. No. Yes, I do.
Yeah, just a second.
370
00:14:27,567 --> 00:14:29,834
Jaime...
Yeah, gee, wow.
371
00:14:29,901 --> 00:14:32,167
LISA: Heads up!
372
00:14:32,234 --> 00:14:33,968
Listen to this.
373
00:14:34,033 --> 00:14:36,000
Who could we hire
to be Sloopy Dunbar? He'll be here.
374
00:14:36,067 --> 00:14:37,968
Five more minutes
and I'm putting you in a Yankee uniform.
375
00:14:38,033 --> 00:14:40,767
Listen to this.
My father is retiring.
376
00:14:40,834 --> 00:14:43,400
What?
He just told me.
377
00:14:43,467 --> 00:14:45,067
Oh, my God. I can't imagine.
378
00:14:45,133 --> 00:14:46,534
What am I gonna say?
What am I gonna say?
379
00:14:46,601 --> 00:14:48,100
About what?
The store.
380
00:14:48,167 --> 00:14:50,534
He wants to
give me the store. I don't want the store.
381
00:14:50,601 --> 00:14:52,334
What am I gonna do
with the store?
382
00:14:52,400 --> 00:14:53,667
So tell him.
383
00:14:53,734 --> 00:14:55,200
Tell him! I've been telling
him since I'm 12.
384
00:14:55,267 --> 00:14:56,968
What, is he gonna
suddenly listen?
385
00:14:57,033 --> 00:14:58,934
So what are you gonna do?
386
00:14:59,000 --> 00:15:01,033
He really likes you.
Forget it.
387
00:15:02,334 --> 00:15:04,167
Is that Sloopy? Excuse me.
388
00:15:04,234 --> 00:15:06,968
Hi, I'm Jaime Buchman,
Mr. Dunbar?
389
00:15:07,033 --> 00:15:09,033
Got my check?
Yes, I do.
390
00:15:09,100 --> 00:15:12,133
Yes, I do have your check.
It's right here.
391
00:15:12,200 --> 00:15:13,534
Call me Sloopy.
Okay.
392
00:15:13,601 --> 00:15:16,200
Uh, Sloopy,
this is my husband, Paul.
393
00:15:16,267 --> 00:15:18,033
Hi, Paul.
Sloopy, I gotta...
394
00:15:18,100 --> 00:15:19,667
Wow! It's just an honor.
395
00:15:19,734 --> 00:15:22,601
I mean, Sloopy Dunbar, wow!
396
00:15:22,667 --> 00:15:25,267
I gotta tell you,
I used to watch you play.
397
00:15:25,334 --> 00:15:26,934
And you probably
don't remember this,
398
00:15:27,000 --> 00:15:29,000
but I was there
at the third game of the '64 Series
399
00:15:29,067 --> 00:15:31,734
and in
the fifth inning you fouled off this pitch.
400
00:15:31,801 --> 00:15:33,767
And it was coming right at me.
401
00:15:33,834 --> 00:15:35,067
I swear, right at me.
402
00:15:35,133 --> 00:15:36,767
And I reach up,
the sun got in my eyes,
403
00:15:36,834 --> 00:15:38,400
and it just went
over my head, but I...
404
00:15:38,467 --> 00:15:40,234
I almost had it.
405
00:15:40,300 --> 00:15:41,701
Can we get
the show on the road?
406
00:15:41,767 --> 00:15:43,033
Okay. Here we go.
407
00:15:43,100 --> 00:15:44,234
This is the crowd?
408
00:15:44,300 --> 00:15:46,234
Uh, well...
Yeah, what did I expect?
409
00:15:46,300 --> 00:15:48,100
They name candy
bars after Reggie Jackson,
410
00:15:48,167 --> 00:15:49,968
they name diseases
after Lou Gehrig.
411
00:15:50,033 --> 00:15:51,501
You know what they
named after me? No.
412
00:15:51,567 --> 00:15:53,801
My sister's kid.
Okay.
413
00:15:53,868 --> 00:15:55,234
Whoa, whoa. Whoa.
414
00:15:55,300 --> 00:15:57,267
Cut off my legs
and call me shorty.
415
00:15:57,334 --> 00:16:00,200
Um, uh, Fran Devanow,
this is Sloopy Dunbar.
416
00:16:00,267 --> 00:16:02,234
Oh, hi.
Hey.
417
00:16:02,300 --> 00:16:03,601
I see no wedding band.
418
00:16:03,667 --> 00:16:05,167
Oh, well, I don't wear it.
419
00:16:05,234 --> 00:16:07,534
I see no tan line.
I don't tan.
420
00:16:07,601 --> 00:16:10,200
What do you say I
spring you for dinner, huh? I don't eat.
421
00:16:10,267 --> 00:16:14,567
If I was Killebrew, you'd eat.
Pretty boy. You ever see him in the shower, huh?
422
00:16:14,634 --> 00:16:17,501
Hey, hey, hey,
look who's here! Burt Buchman.
423
00:16:17,567 --> 00:16:19,400
Welcome to my store.
424
00:16:19,467 --> 00:16:21,501
I got to say,
43 years in one location,
425
00:16:21,567 --> 00:16:22,734
and nothing like this.
426
00:16:22,801 --> 00:16:24,734
Paulie, get the camera.
I got it.
427
00:16:24,801 --> 00:16:26,300
What a thing.
Is this a thing?
428
00:16:26,367 --> 00:16:28,267
I told you we're
going out with a bang.
429
00:16:28,334 --> 00:16:30,133
Hey, you want to meet
my heir apparent?
430
00:16:30,200 --> 00:16:31,534
Okay, Dad...
431
00:16:31,601 --> 00:16:33,434
You come back next year,
this will be the man.
432
00:16:33,501 --> 00:16:34,634
All right, Dad, it's okay.
433
00:16:34,701 --> 00:16:36,000
What, okay? He's got to know.
Listen...
434
00:16:36,067 --> 00:16:37,834
Ira, get over here.
What?
435
00:16:37,901 --> 00:16:40,300
Come over here.
436
00:16:40,367 --> 00:16:42,467
Here he is, this is the man.
437
00:16:42,534 --> 00:16:44,868
Hey. Hang on, Sloopy.
438
00:16:53,734 --> 00:16:55,801
Where you going?
I'm going for a little walk.
439
00:16:55,868 --> 00:16:57,801
Are you okay?
Yeah. Why wouldn't I be?
440
00:16:57,868 --> 00:16:59,567
No reason.
441
00:16:59,634 --> 00:17:01,367
Because my father
didn't leave me the store?
442
00:17:01,434 --> 00:17:03,667
I don't want the store.
Okay.
443
00:17:03,734 --> 00:17:05,367
So why would it bother me?
444
00:17:05,434 --> 00:17:06,501
Because he didn't ask you.
445
00:17:06,567 --> 00:17:08,234
Hey, Paulie,
big deal, huh?
446
00:17:08,300 --> 00:17:10,300
Hey, hey, good for you.
Thanks.
447
00:17:10,367 --> 00:17:13,234
I mean, I don't know what
I'm gonna do when the band hits, but you know...
448
00:17:13,300 --> 00:17:15,133
(SCOFFING)
That's the price of success.
449
00:17:16,567 --> 00:17:18,634
I'm gonna...
Do you want some company?
450
00:17:18,701 --> 00:17:20,634
No.
Okay.
451
00:17:20,701 --> 00:17:22,467
I'm going to go
check on Sloopy.
452
00:17:22,534 --> 00:17:24,734
Okay, why don't you do that?
What?
453
00:17:24,801 --> 00:17:26,400
No, go. Go check on Sloopy.
454
00:17:26,467 --> 00:17:28,334
No, 'cause you're doing great.
Yay! You're packing them in here,
455
00:17:28,400 --> 00:17:30,501
and I'm sure your business
is really gonna take off. That's good.
456
00:17:30,567 --> 00:17:32,334
So at least one of us will...
457
00:17:32,400 --> 00:17:35,534
I would just appreciate it
if you didn't lord it over me like that. Okay?
458
00:17:35,601 --> 00:17:37,267
I'm very impressed, yeah.
You can go to school,
459
00:17:37,334 --> 00:17:38,634
and you can
open up your own business,
460
00:17:38,701 --> 00:17:40,534
and you can do...
And you can cook from Taiwan.
461
00:17:40,601 --> 00:17:42,434
That's great. Meanwhile,
I'll teach the entire world
462
00:17:42,501 --> 00:17:44,634
how to put their
trays in an upright position.
463
00:17:44,701 --> 00:17:46,133
So I'm real...
Excuse me,
464
00:17:46,200 --> 00:17:47,901
what is the difference
between these two clubs?
465
00:17:47,968 --> 00:17:49,400
Six iron. Eight iron.
466
00:17:49,467 --> 00:17:50,767
So...
So the difference would be two.
467
00:17:50,834 --> 00:17:52,634
Okay. Will you excuse us,
please?
468
00:17:54,033 --> 00:17:56,234
First of all,
I am doing this for me.
469
00:17:56,300 --> 00:17:59,400
I am doing what I want to do.
I thought we settled that.
470
00:17:59,467 --> 00:18:00,601
Well, maybe we did.
471
00:18:00,667 --> 00:18:03,567
Or maybe you're
just angry at your father.
472
00:18:03,634 --> 00:18:05,834
Yes. Yes,
I'm angry at my father,
473
00:18:05,901 --> 00:18:07,701
but I can't talk to my father.
474
00:18:07,767 --> 00:18:09,734
I know how to talk to you.
475
00:18:12,667 --> 00:18:14,567
What would I say to him?
What do I say?
476
00:18:14,634 --> 00:18:17,000
"Gee, Dad,
why didn't you believe in me?
477
00:18:17,067 --> 00:18:20,067
"Did you think I
couldn't handle it?"
478
00:18:20,133 --> 00:18:22,234
He didn't even
give me the option.
479
00:18:22,300 --> 00:18:24,033
Just ask him why.
480
00:18:26,300 --> 00:18:28,067
What is he gonna say?
481
00:18:39,434 --> 00:18:40,534
Hi, Paulie, how you doing?
482
00:18:40,601 --> 00:18:42,133
Good, I'm okay. Listen...
483
00:18:43,734 --> 00:18:45,801
I'm actually tired.
484
00:18:45,868 --> 00:18:48,534
I'm not tired, tired.
You know, I just... I took a nap this afternoon,
485
00:18:48,601 --> 00:18:50,367
but I don't know
if I fell asleep.
486
00:18:50,434 --> 00:18:52,234
Maybe I fell asleep.
I don't even know.
487
00:18:52,300 --> 00:18:54,033
Listen, Dad...
I had them right here.
488
00:18:54,100 --> 00:18:55,300
What's that?
489
00:18:55,367 --> 00:18:56,434
(EXCLAIMS)
490
00:18:57,934 --> 00:19:00,701
So Ira is taking
over the store, huh?
491
00:19:00,767 --> 00:19:03,067
Well, your sisters
didn't want it.
492
00:19:03,133 --> 00:19:04,334
You asked them?
493
00:19:04,400 --> 00:19:06,968
Of course. What kind of father
do you think I am?
494
00:19:07,033 --> 00:19:10,067
Hey, look what I found.
You see who it is?
495
00:19:10,133 --> 00:19:11,300
Sloopy.
It's Sloopy.
496
00:19:11,367 --> 00:19:13,367
Maybe he'll sign it, huh?
Remember that game?
497
00:19:15,000 --> 00:19:16,300
You saved this?
498
00:19:16,367 --> 00:19:19,434
You took it.
You and that damn camera.
499
00:19:19,501 --> 00:19:21,234
Ah, they're gone.
500
00:19:22,334 --> 00:19:23,601
What?
What are you looking for?
501
00:19:23,667 --> 00:19:25,200
There's not a tennis ball
in the joint.
502
00:19:25,267 --> 00:19:28,067
We must have sold out.
Some sale, huh?
503
00:19:28,133 --> 00:19:29,400
Yeah.
504
00:19:29,467 --> 00:19:31,133
You know, that wife of yours,
505
00:19:31,200 --> 00:19:33,067
she has some ideas.
Yeah.
506
00:19:33,133 --> 00:19:35,000
This was good for her.
507
00:19:35,067 --> 00:19:36,467
Tell you the truth,
I think she was
508
00:19:36,534 --> 00:19:39,100
beginning to feel
a little left behind.
509
00:19:39,934 --> 00:19:41,267
By who?
510
00:19:41,334 --> 00:19:44,234
Is she married to
somebody else?
511
00:19:44,300 --> 00:19:48,033
How is she... How is she
left behind by me? I'm not going anywhere.
512
00:19:48,100 --> 00:19:50,334
Going? You're going!
You've been going since you were 12.
513
00:19:50,400 --> 00:19:52,634
You and that damn camera.
514
00:19:52,701 --> 00:19:54,734
Paulie, what time is it?
515
00:19:54,801 --> 00:19:56,400
It's practically 5:00.
516
00:19:56,467 --> 00:19:59,767
It's almost over.
Forty-three years.
517
00:19:59,834 --> 00:20:01,400
Who'd have thought?
518
00:20:01,467 --> 00:20:03,567
Do you know how many times
we almost went under?
519
00:20:04,934 --> 00:20:06,267
I never heard that.
520
00:20:06,334 --> 00:20:08,934
1962, we were that far
from closing up for good.
521
00:20:09,000 --> 00:20:10,901
Don't tell your mother.
I wouldn't want her to worry.
522
00:20:12,467 --> 00:20:13,968
I never knew...
What happened?
523
00:20:14,033 --> 00:20:17,501
I kept going. Here I am.
524
00:20:17,567 --> 00:20:21,000
You know,
it's not going to be that easy for me to walk away.
525
00:20:21,067 --> 00:20:24,501
At least I know
I'm leaving it in good hands.
526
00:20:24,567 --> 00:20:26,000
You got Ira.
527
00:20:26,067 --> 00:20:28,901
Oh, yeah, listen,
I've been meaning to talk to you about that.
528
00:20:28,968 --> 00:20:30,400
Really?
529
00:20:30,467 --> 00:20:34,000
You don't think I
made him feel bad, do you?
530
00:20:34,968 --> 00:20:36,667
What are you talking about?
531
00:20:36,734 --> 00:20:38,200
Well, I mean,
he needs it and he's good at it,
532
00:20:38,267 --> 00:20:40,400
but he has his heart
so set on that
533
00:20:40,467 --> 00:20:43,367
cockamamie band of his
being the next big thing.
534
00:20:43,434 --> 00:20:45,300
Yeah, well, you don't know.
Maybe it will be.
535
00:20:45,367 --> 00:20:47,534
Oh, come on.
You know and I know.
536
00:20:49,300 --> 00:20:50,667
Not like you.
537
00:20:54,400 --> 00:20:57,133
Paulie, tell me something.
What?
538
00:20:57,200 --> 00:20:58,667
Am I standing?
539
00:21:00,767 --> 00:21:03,000
Yeah.
I love these sneakers.
540
00:21:08,100 --> 00:21:09,234
PAUL: Tired?
541
00:21:09,300 --> 00:21:11,167
JAMIE: It's nice though.
542
00:21:11,234 --> 00:21:12,934
When's the last time
we stayed up and watched the sunrise?
543
00:21:16,100 --> 00:21:17,300
Don't get up.
544
00:21:17,367 --> 00:21:18,567
Oh, all right.
545
00:21:20,167 --> 00:21:22,267
Look, Paulie, he signed it.
546
00:21:22,334 --> 00:21:23,534
You don't mind if
I keep it, do you?
547
00:21:23,601 --> 00:21:25,267
He said he'll
give you a ball.
548
00:21:25,334 --> 00:21:26,801
All yours.
549
00:21:27,934 --> 00:21:29,534
Thank you, sweetheart.
Thank you.
550
00:21:29,601 --> 00:21:31,267
Ira, closing up?
Closing up.
551
00:21:31,334 --> 00:21:32,901
Okay, boss.
552
00:21:32,968 --> 00:21:34,267
I'll get us a cab.
553
00:21:34,334 --> 00:21:36,834
If I was Mantle,
they'd have sent a car.
554
00:21:36,901 --> 00:21:39,701
Either I'm really tired,
or he grows on you.
555
00:21:39,767 --> 00:21:42,300
Fran, come on, I haven't had
nothing to eat all night except tobacco.
556
00:21:43,367 --> 00:21:44,501
I'm really tired.
557
00:21:44,567 --> 00:21:46,067
(LAUGHING)
558
00:21:48,234 --> 00:21:49,968
Oh, one second.
559
00:21:50,601 --> 00:21:51,868
Hey, kid.
560
00:22:06,067 --> 00:22:08,334
Okay, now this is my imitation
of Mattingly
561
00:22:08,400 --> 00:22:10,534
during the '94 World Series.
562
00:22:10,601 --> 00:22:12,033
(SNORING)
563
00:22:13,868 --> 00:22:17,467
Okay, now this is my
imitation of Canseco during the '94 World Series.
564
00:22:18,334 --> 00:22:19,701
(LAUGHING)
565
00:22:21,300 --> 00:22:23,868
Now, this is my
imitation of Bagwell
566
00:22:23,934 --> 00:22:25,300
during the '94 World Series.
567
00:22:27,100 --> 00:22:28,634
(WHISTLES)
568
00:22:33,767 --> 00:22:35,400
I'm really tired.
569
00:22:35,450 --> 00:22:40,000
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