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1
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Synced and corrected by Katniss Everdeen.
www.addic7ed.com
2
00:00:03,940 --> 00:00:06,208
Hey, Liv. Hey, check you out.
3
00:00:06,210 --> 00:00:08,110
- My girlfriend's a super hero.
- Hey.
4
00:00:08,112 --> 00:00:10,312
Skyvolt!
5
00:00:10,314 --> 00:00:11,980
Thank goodness you're here.
6
00:00:11,982 --> 00:00:14,316
An evil lurks in the cafeteria.
7
00:00:14,318 --> 00:00:16,251
Liver nuggets!
8
00:00:18,354 --> 00:00:20,222
Okay, well, sorry, Aubrey.
9
00:00:20,224 --> 00:00:22,791
I'm not exactly in super
hero mode right now.
10
00:00:22,793 --> 00:00:24,993
I actually just popped over
from set to pick up my homework.
11
00:00:24,995 --> 00:00:26,328
But, I mean, let's be honest.
12
00:00:26,330 --> 00:00:27,970
A cape really helps you make an entrance.
13
00:00:29,565 --> 00:00:31,400
Also helps you make an exit.
14
00:00:35,738 --> 00:00:40,308
Skyvolt, an evil lurks in the
cafeteria only you can fight.
15
00:00:40,310 --> 00:00:42,210
Yeah, heard. It's them liver nuggets.
16
00:00:42,212 --> 00:00:43,645
(Laughs)
17
00:00:43,647 --> 00:00:45,213
Liv, honey, thank
goodness you're here...
18
00:00:45,215 --> 00:00:47,549
I cannot do anything
about these liver nuggets!
19
00:00:47,551 --> 00:00:49,518
Okay.
20
00:00:49,520 --> 00:00:52,554
The music program's budget
is being cut in half.
21
00:00:52,556 --> 00:00:54,356
- What?
- Mmm-hmm.
22
00:00:54,358 --> 00:00:55,490
No!
23
00:00:55,492 --> 00:00:57,259
You have to save music, Mrs. Rooney.
24
00:00:57,261 --> 00:00:58,693
Well, I am working on it.
25
00:00:58,695 --> 00:01:01,596
I am planning fund raisers.
I'm even gonna have a concert.
26
00:01:01,598 --> 00:01:04,366
A local sponsor will match
every dollar that we raise.
27
00:01:04,368 --> 00:01:06,835
Wow. Who's playing at the concert?
28
00:01:06,837 --> 00:01:09,938
Well, I was hoping that
The Dream could play.
29
00:01:09,940 --> 00:01:13,408
Now, I know the band broke up
when Andie and Holden broke up.
30
00:01:14,691 --> 00:01:16,411
Which maybe I shouldn't
have even mentioned.
31
00:01:16,413 --> 00:01:19,414
It's cool. I'm with Dump Truck now.
32
00:01:19,416 --> 00:01:22,250
- And I'm with Liv.
- And I'm with Joey...
33
00:01:22,252 --> 00:01:24,352
whether he acknowledges it or not.
34
00:01:25,521 --> 00:01:29,591
I mean... guys, what do you say?
35
00:01:29,593 --> 00:01:31,393
Do you wanna get The Dream back together?
36
00:01:31,395 --> 00:01:33,228
- Yes!
- Let's do it!
37
00:01:33,230 --> 00:01:36,398
Great! So, it's this Saturday night.
38
00:01:36,400 --> 00:01:39,367
- Oh, no. Saturday?
- Yeah.
39
00:01:39,369 --> 00:01:42,270
You guys, I can't.
I'm... I'm so sorry.
40
00:01:42,272 --> 00:01:44,072
I'm shooting Voltage all weekend.
41
00:01:44,074 --> 00:01:45,474
Skyvolt!
42
00:01:46,442 --> 00:01:48,376
The liver nuggets have mutated.
43
00:01:48,378 --> 00:01:50,779
We need you now more than ever.
44
00:01:52,648 --> 00:01:54,282
What the heck. Let's save lunch!
45
00:01:58,888 --> 00:02:01,156
(Theme music playing)
46
00:02:01,158 --> 00:02:02,624
Better in stereo
47
00:02:02,626 --> 00:02:04,960
B... B... Better
in stereo
48
00:02:04,962 --> 00:02:06,995
-
I'm up with the sunshine
-
Let's go
49
00:02:06,997 --> 00:02:09,164
-
I lace up my high tops
-
Oh no
50
00:02:09,166 --> 00:02:11,299
Slam dunk, ready or not
51
00:02:11,301 --> 00:02:13,001
Yeah, show me what you got
52
00:02:13,003 --> 00:02:15,504
-
I'm under the spotlight
-
Holler
53
00:02:15,506 --> 00:02:17,506
I dare you, come on and follow
54
00:02:17,508 --> 00:02:19,841
You dance to your own beat
55
00:02:19,843 --> 00:02:21,843
I'll sing the melody
56
00:02:21,845 --> 00:02:24,279
When you
say yea-ah-ah
57
00:02:24,281 --> 00:02:26,314
I say
no-oh-oh
58
00:02:26,316 --> 00:02:28,416
When you say stop
59
00:02:28,418 --> 00:02:30,685
All I want to do is go, go, go
60
00:02:30,687 --> 00:02:33,655
You, you, the other half of me, me
61
00:02:33,657 --> 00:02:35,624
The half I'll never be-e
62
00:02:35,626 --> 00:02:39,461
The half that drives me crazy
63
00:02:39,463 --> 00:02:42,497
You, you, the better half of me, me
64
00:02:42,499 --> 00:02:44,833
The half I'll always ne-ed
65
00:02:44,835 --> 00:02:46,434
But we both know
66
00:02:46,436 --> 00:02:48,403
We're better in stereo
67
00:02:51,607 --> 00:02:53,542
Hey, Mom, do you have a minute to talk?
68
00:02:53,544 --> 00:02:57,012
So, I just got a letter from Notre Dame,
69
00:02:57,014 --> 00:02:59,381
and they offered me a
basketball scholarship.
70
00:02:59,383 --> 00:03:03,385
So, that makes five schools
now that have made me offers.
71
00:03:03,387 --> 00:03:05,987
- Five? Can you... just... give me a second.
- Yeah. Yeah.
72
00:03:05,989 --> 00:03:08,790
My baby's going to college for free
73
00:03:08,792 --> 00:03:10,659
My baby's going to college for free
74
00:03:10,661 --> 00:03:12,360
Wooh!
75
00:03:15,698 --> 00:03:17,365
So, that's exciting news.
76
00:03:17,367 --> 00:03:19,167
(Snorts) Ah.
77
00:03:19,169 --> 00:03:23,838
Yeah, and it's exciting to have so
many schools interested in me. Um...
78
00:03:23,840 --> 00:03:25,473
I don't know. I just
need your help choosing.
79
00:03:25,475 --> 00:03:27,475
Well, what are you thinking?
80
00:03:27,477 --> 00:03:31,813
I've just always had my heart set on
Southern California State University,
81
00:03:31,815 --> 00:03:34,749
and none of these schools are giving
me that same feeling of excitement.
82
00:03:34,751 --> 00:03:36,551
Honey, I know that you're disappointed
83
00:03:36,553 --> 00:03:39,020
that SCSU didn't offer you
a scholarship, but you...
84
00:03:39,022 --> 00:03:40,922
you still have some great choices.
85
00:03:40,924 --> 00:03:42,023
Yeah.
86
00:03:42,025 --> 00:03:48,263
So let Mama help you decide by taking you...
on a little trip...
87
00:03:48,265 --> 00:03:49,998
to the future.
88
00:03:51,767 --> 00:03:55,103
So, in this therapeutic role-play,
89
00:03:55,105 --> 00:03:58,506
I will be future you after
you've chosen a school.
90
00:03:59,442 --> 00:04:00,909
(Clears throat)
91
00:04:06,549 --> 00:04:07,515
'sup?
92
00:04:09,118 --> 00:04:11,419
Pick a school, son.
93
00:04:11,421 --> 00:04:14,689
Okay. Uh.
94
00:04:14,691 --> 00:04:16,424
Maybe let's try UConn.
95
00:04:21,797 --> 00:04:22,931
'Sup?
96
00:04:24,133 --> 00:04:28,036
So, like, I totally went to UConn.
97
00:04:28,038 --> 00:04:30,772
And, uh, after retiring from
pro ball... (Snorts, laughs)
98
00:04:30,774 --> 00:04:35,143
I stopped visiting my mom in
Wisconsin, and she died alone.
99
00:04:35,145 --> 00:04:37,279
- A-bam! What?
- Mom.
100
00:04:38,547 --> 00:04:40,448
Mom, I don't say, "Bam.
What?" after everything.
101
00:04:40,450 --> 00:04:43,184
But in the future, you do. It's a problem.
102
00:04:50,159 --> 00:04:56,798
Help fund the music department by
competing in Paws On A Porcupine!
103
00:04:56,800 --> 00:05:00,068
The student who keeps his
paw on Paulie the longest
104
00:05:00,070 --> 00:05:02,637
wins this... mystery prize.
105
00:05:02,639 --> 00:05:04,639
Oooh.
106
00:05:06,008 --> 00:05:10,245
This competition is generously
sponsored by Beef McGravy's.
107
00:05:10,247 --> 00:05:14,683
"It's the place to go when you
want beef and gr... and gravy."
108
00:05:14,685 --> 00:05:16,584
Sounds dumb.
109
00:05:16,586 --> 00:05:17,919
Won't catch me doing that.
110
00:05:17,921 --> 00:05:21,589
Okay, but I guess you won't win the
Geohawk Hands-Free Electric Skateboard.
111
00:05:25,695 --> 00:05:28,697
Did you just say Geohawk
Hands-Free Electric Skateboard?
112
00:05:30,666 --> 00:05:33,001
Mom had this bad boy
delivered to the house.
113
00:05:33,003 --> 00:05:34,536
She hid it in the hamper...
114
00:05:35,671 --> 00:05:38,306
where I happened to already be hiding.
115
00:05:38,308 --> 00:05:39,774
I have to put it back now.
116
00:05:43,846 --> 00:05:45,680
It's gotta be the mystery prize.
117
00:05:45,682 --> 00:05:47,282
Okay, okay! Then let's do it!
118
00:05:47,284 --> 00:05:50,618
'Cause if one of us wins the Geohawk
Hands-Free Electric Skateboard,
119
00:05:50,620 --> 00:05:53,188
we both win the Geohawk
Hands-Free Electric Skateboard.
120
00:05:53,190 --> 00:05:54,689
Correction.
121
00:05:55,891 --> 00:06:00,695
It will be I who wins the Geohawk
Hands-Free Electric Skateboard. (Laughs)
122
00:06:00,697 --> 00:06:02,530
Eavesdropping-
pays-off-again burn.
123
00:06:05,634 --> 00:06:11,973
All right, contestants, if your
paw leaves Paulie, you're out.
124
00:06:11,975 --> 00:06:14,342
Last competitor standing wins.
125
00:06:14,344 --> 00:06:15,744
Paws up...
126
00:06:17,046 --> 00:06:18,279
and go!
127
00:06:19,515 --> 00:06:22,684
The Rooney brothers
will destroy you, Artie.
128
00:06:22,686 --> 00:06:23,985
It's nothing personal.
129
00:06:23,987 --> 00:06:26,654
It's just that we despise you.
130
00:06:29,058 --> 00:06:31,793
Your rage empowers me.
131
00:06:33,662 --> 00:06:35,930
Nothing can distract me now.
132
00:06:35,932 --> 00:06:38,566
- Hey, guys!
- Except her.
133
00:06:38,568 --> 00:06:40,402
(Whistle blows) You're out.
134
00:06:42,438 --> 00:06:44,272
Bless you, Taylor.
135
00:06:44,274 --> 00:06:47,509
You're one self-sacrifice
closer to minion of the month.
136
00:06:48,577 --> 00:06:51,713
Um, okay. So has anybody seen Willow?
137
00:06:51,715 --> 00:06:53,715
Because they changed my Voltage schedule,
138
00:06:53,717 --> 00:06:55,183
and now I can do the concert!
139
00:06:55,185 --> 00:06:56,751
Yeah, I think I saw her in the gym.
140
00:06:56,753 --> 00:06:59,687
Thank you, and, boys, good
luck with the contest.
141
00:06:59,689 --> 00:07:01,523
Perhaps a kiss for luck, milady?
142
00:07:04,927 --> 00:07:07,595
I mean... yeah, why not?
143
00:07:13,402 --> 00:07:16,638
You can kiss minion of the month goodbye.
144
00:07:16,640 --> 00:07:19,607
(Whispers) Just leave.
145
00:07:20,943 --> 00:07:23,578
When we hear the bass
146
00:07:23,580 --> 00:07:26,781
We'll be losing our minds
147
00:07:26,783 --> 00:07:28,783
-
Say hey!
-
First one up
148
00:07:28,785 --> 00:07:32,253
Our song is the one that goes like
149
00:07:32,255 --> 00:07:33,288
All:
Say hey!
150
00:07:33,290 --> 00:07:36,991
Hey hey...
Liv.
151
00:07:39,662 --> 00:07:40,895
Hey.
152
00:07:42,431 --> 00:07:44,332
Are you guys replacing me?
153
00:07:44,334 --> 00:07:46,668
No. No, no, no. We're not replacing you.
154
00:07:46,670 --> 00:07:49,904
We're looking for someone to replace you.
155
00:07:51,774 --> 00:07:53,875
Uh, that did not come out right.
156
00:07:59,796 --> 00:08:02,116
You kicked me out of the band,
and you didn't even tell me?
157
00:08:02,118 --> 00:08:04,252
Liv, Aubrey's just here for an audition.
158
00:08:04,254 --> 00:08:06,788
All right? We were looking for
somebody to sing with us on Saturday
159
00:08:06,790 --> 00:08:08,256
because you said that you couldn't.
160
00:08:08,258 --> 00:08:09,858
Yeah, and if we couldn't find anyone
161
00:08:09,860 --> 00:08:12,360
we figured we wouldn't
have to bring it up at all.
162
00:08:12,362 --> 00:08:13,995
(Inhales sharply) Still
did not come out right.
163
00:08:13,997 --> 00:08:17,699
You know what? You're right, Liv.
164
00:08:17,701 --> 00:08:20,268
We should have told you what we were doing.
165
00:08:20,270 --> 00:08:23,538
I feel like a real jerk-face.
166
00:08:24,673 --> 00:08:27,709
I'm a jerk-face, I was wrong
167
00:08:27,711 --> 00:08:30,144
I dance for you and sing this song
168
00:08:30,146 --> 00:08:32,380
Jerk-face,
jerk-face
169
00:08:32,382 --> 00:08:34,782
Jerk-face
170
00:08:34,784 --> 00:08:36,784
Yeah
171
00:08:42,391 --> 00:08:45,894
Wow, wow. What...
What was that?
172
00:08:45,896 --> 00:08:49,697
The Gustamante Jerk-face song.
173
00:08:49,699 --> 00:08:52,000
It's how my brothers and
I apologize to each other.
174
00:08:52,002 --> 00:08:55,603
The stupider you look,
the more sorry you are.
175
00:09:00,075 --> 00:09:02,744
I'm super sorry.
176
00:09:02,746 --> 00:09:04,379
We're all super sorry.
177
00:09:04,381 --> 00:09:07,315
Holden, you know you're not
supposed to keep secrets from me.
178
00:09:07,317 --> 00:09:09,984
I mean, it wasn't a secret, per se.
179
00:09:09,986 --> 00:09:13,288
Right? It was more of
a... delay of information.
180
00:09:14,323 --> 00:09:16,658
Yeah, like how you didn't
tell Andie right away
181
00:09:16,660 --> 00:09:19,060
that Holden broke up with her
because he was really into you.
182
00:09:21,931 --> 00:09:23,765
What?
183
00:09:23,767 --> 00:09:28,703
Unless you never told Andie that, in
which case, One, two, three, four,
184
00:09:28,705 --> 00:09:30,738
five, six! Hey, hey, hey!
185
00:09:30,740 --> 00:09:32,040
Willow, Willow, Willow, Willow, stop.
186
00:09:32,042 --> 00:09:34,776
- Andie, just let me explain.
- It's pretty clear.
187
00:09:34,778 --> 00:09:36,377
Holden dumped me for my friend,
188
00:09:36,379 --> 00:09:38,212
who didn't have the
decency to tell me about it.
189
00:09:38,214 --> 00:09:41,816
No, Andie. That's
not... Andie!
190
00:09:44,887 --> 00:09:46,087
I feel horrible.
191
00:09:49,725 --> 00:09:51,225
Now's probably not the right time,
192
00:09:51,227 --> 00:09:54,529
but I just wanted to say
that I can play bass, too.
193
00:09:56,065 --> 00:09:59,634
Just... putting it out there.
194
00:10:05,608 --> 00:10:11,479
We're into hour six of Paws On A
Porcupine sponsored by Beef McGravy's.
195
00:10:11,481 --> 00:10:14,782
"Come for the beef, stay for the gravy."
196
00:10:15,951 --> 00:10:18,219
It's time to thin the herd.
197
00:10:18,221 --> 00:10:19,687
Taylor, onion.
198
00:10:22,224 --> 00:10:24,058
(Exhales)
199
00:10:24,060 --> 00:10:25,760
(Crowd groans)
200
00:10:25,762 --> 00:10:26,928
(Whistle blows)
201
00:10:26,930 --> 00:10:28,496
You two are out!
202
00:10:29,798 --> 00:10:31,733
Bleh.
203
00:10:31,735 --> 00:10:36,404
Artie, using onion breath
to eliminate a competitor.
204
00:10:36,406 --> 00:10:37,772
That's devious.
205
00:10:37,774 --> 00:10:39,407
It's Newton's Third Law.
206
00:10:39,409 --> 00:10:41,743
For every action,
there's an equal reaction.
207
00:10:41,745 --> 00:10:45,079
Uh, an equal and opposite reaction.
208
00:10:45,081 --> 00:10:47,081
Hush while the grownups are talking, child.
209
00:10:48,450 --> 00:10:50,351
Newton said no such thing.
210
00:10:50,353 --> 00:10:52,620
Are you kidding me? Watch.
211
00:10:52,622 --> 00:10:55,790
Action, opposite reaction.
212
00:10:55,792 --> 00:10:58,026
(Whistle blows) You're out!
213
00:10:58,028 --> 00:11:00,128
What? No!
214
00:11:00,130 --> 00:11:03,031
Thanks for the science lesson, younglin'.
215
00:11:10,506 --> 00:11:12,206
Hey, Mom. Is Dad here yet?
216
00:11:12,208 --> 00:11:13,841
Oh, no, but you know who is?
217
00:11:13,843 --> 00:11:17,011
Future Maddie as a Syracuse Orange.
218
00:11:20,049 --> 00:11:21,949
'Sup?
219
00:11:21,951 --> 00:11:24,352
Mom, you're not gonna die alone.
220
00:11:24,354 --> 00:11:26,020
Joey is never leaving.
221
00:11:26,022 --> 00:11:28,189
(Exhales)
222
00:11:29,558 --> 00:11:31,325
I know.
223
00:11:31,327 --> 00:11:33,728
Dad's home!
224
00:11:33,730 --> 00:11:35,163
Welcome home, sweetheart.
225
00:11:35,165 --> 00:11:37,899
Dad! I am so happy to see you.
226
00:11:37,901 --> 00:11:41,669
And I am glad to see you, because...
227
00:11:41,671 --> 00:11:44,405
as the head coach of the
University of Wisconsin Beloit,
228
00:11:44,407 --> 00:11:49,043
it is my pleasure to offer
you a basketball scholarship.
229
00:11:49,045 --> 00:11:51,913
(Gasp) What? Dad!
230
00:11:52,915 --> 00:11:54,882
Oh, this is so great!
231
00:11:54,884 --> 00:11:56,884
How'd you like to play for your dad again?
232
00:11:56,886 --> 00:11:59,053
Now, now. She doesn't
have to decide right now.
233
00:11:59,055 --> 00:12:01,923
She has five other offers,
and this is a big decision.
234
00:12:01,925 --> 00:12:03,758
Right, yeah. Um.
235
00:12:03,760 --> 00:12:06,661
Yeah, actually, Dad, I've been
having a really hard time choosing.
236
00:12:06,663 --> 00:12:07,929
Do you think that maybe we could...
237
00:12:07,931 --> 00:12:10,431
talk about what school
might be best for me?
238
00:12:10,433 --> 00:12:14,035
Oh. I can't talk to
you about other schools.
239
00:12:14,037 --> 00:12:15,536
It would be a conflict of interest.
240
00:12:15,538 --> 00:12:18,286
But, you know, maybe you should
talk to your mom about it.
241
00:12:18,317 --> 00:12:19,003
(Gasp)
242
00:12:20,409 --> 00:12:22,577
I'll need a Beloit hat for this!
243
00:12:28,951 --> 00:12:31,519
We have got to talk to Andie.
244
00:12:31,521 --> 00:12:33,387
I mean, she thinks that
we're horrible people.
245
00:12:33,389 --> 00:12:34,789
Are we horrible people?
246
00:12:34,791 --> 00:12:36,724
- No, we...
- I always thought we were the good guys,
247
00:12:36,726 --> 00:12:39,794
but that is probably exactly
what the bad guys think.
248
00:12:39,796 --> 00:12:41,129
- You know, we're not...
- Oh!
249
00:12:41,964 --> 00:12:43,431
I'm a super villain.
250
00:12:43,433 --> 00:12:45,433
Okay.
251
00:12:45,435 --> 00:12:46,934
Holden, breath.
252
00:12:46,936 --> 00:12:50,605
I mean, you know, Willow said
that Andie calmed down, right?
253
00:12:50,607 --> 00:12:51,873
(Grunts)
254
00:12:53,575 --> 00:12:55,443
- Let me go!
- (Grunts)
255
00:12:55,445 --> 00:12:57,311
Willow, what...
did you kidnap her?
256
00:12:57,313 --> 00:13:00,114
Who cares? She's here now. Let's talk.
257
00:13:00,116 --> 00:13:01,149
Wha...
258
00:13:01,151 --> 00:13:02,750
I'm out of here.
259
00:13:02,752 --> 00:13:05,453
Wait, wait, wait, wait, wait,
wait, just let me explain.
260
00:13:05,455 --> 00:13:07,955
Fine. Make it quick.
261
00:13:07,957 --> 00:13:09,991
Okay.
262
00:13:09,993 --> 00:13:15,663
I liked Holden... but I backed
off when you asked him to prom.
263
00:13:15,665 --> 00:13:19,734
And yes, he did break up
with you because he liked me,
264
00:13:19,736 --> 00:13:22,470
but I told him I wasn't gonna
go out with him, repeatedly.
265
00:13:22,472 --> 00:13:24,138
That's what happened. I was there.
266
00:13:24,140 --> 00:13:25,206
- Yeah.
- Yeah.
267
00:13:26,809 --> 00:13:29,343
Andie, I would never
betray your friendship.
268
00:13:29,345 --> 00:13:33,181
The only reason that we're finally
going out is because you suggested it.
269
00:13:33,183 --> 00:13:34,582
But you should have told me.
270
00:13:34,584 --> 00:13:37,852
I know. I know I should have told you,
271
00:13:37,854 --> 00:13:39,854
but you were hurting
and I just thought that
272
00:13:39,856 --> 00:13:42,356
this would have made it so much worse.
273
00:13:42,358 --> 00:13:44,992
- And if it helps at all...
- It does not.
274
00:13:44,994 --> 00:13:46,060
- Shh.
- Okay.
275
00:13:48,497 --> 00:13:50,097
I am so sorry, Andie.
276
00:13:51,033 --> 00:13:52,333
I should have told you sooner.
277
00:13:52,335 --> 00:13:55,203
Your friendship means so much to me.
278
00:13:56,872 --> 00:13:58,873
I appreciate your honesty.
279
00:13:58,875 --> 00:14:00,975
I just don't know how I'm
gonna get over all this.
280
00:14:00,977 --> 00:14:03,044
No, totally. I get it.
281
00:14:03,046 --> 00:14:05,746
I mean, I was a real... jerk-face.
282
00:14:07,883 --> 00:14:10,184
I'm a jerk-face, I was wrong
283
00:14:10,186 --> 00:14:12,453
I dance for you, I sing this song
284
00:14:12,455 --> 00:14:14,689
Jerk-face,
jerk-face
(Squealing)
285
00:14:14,691 --> 00:14:16,457
Jerk-face
286
00:14:16,459 --> 00:14:18,125
(Gasps)
287
00:14:19,661 --> 00:14:24,465
Second verse, same as the first but
Holden style, much much worse.
288
00:14:24,467 --> 00:14:26,968
I'm a jerk-face, I was wrong
289
00:14:26,970 --> 00:14:28,803
I dance for you and sing this song
290
00:14:28,805 --> 00:14:30,905
Jerk-face, ah!
Jerk-face, ah!
291
00:14:30,907 --> 00:14:31,973
Jerk-face
292
00:14:31,975 --> 00:14:33,441
Yeah!
293
00:14:36,144 --> 00:14:38,246
(Chuckles) Wow.
294
00:14:38,248 --> 00:14:42,149
(Laughs) That was the
stupidest thing I've ever seen.
295
00:14:44,219 --> 00:14:46,721
You guys must be really sorry.
296
00:14:46,723 --> 00:14:48,222
Are we good?
297
00:14:49,391 --> 00:14:50,725
- We're good.
- (Sighs)
298
00:14:50,727 --> 00:14:53,361
- (Laughs)
- Yes! The Dream lives!
299
00:14:53,363 --> 00:14:55,096
Let's go rehearse.
300
00:14:55,098 --> 00:14:58,433
Hold on! A certain kidnapper
owes me a jerk-face dance.
301
00:14:58,464 --> 00:14:59,267
(Gasps)
302
00:14:59,269 --> 00:15:02,103
(Laughs)
303
00:15:02,105 --> 00:15:04,272
Willow doesn't jerk-face.
304
00:15:04,274 --> 00:15:06,274
- Okay.
- Okay.
305
00:15:06,276 --> 00:15:08,142
- Here we go.
- Yeah.
306
00:15:15,918 --> 00:15:18,252
Hey.
307
00:15:18,254 --> 00:15:21,122
Aren't you supposed to be at
the Paws On A Porcupine thing?
308
00:15:21,124 --> 00:15:23,524
Yeah. I just stopped by to get snacks.
309
00:15:23,526 --> 00:15:25,459
I think Joey might win.
310
00:15:25,461 --> 00:15:27,895
Wow. (Chuckles)
311
00:15:27,897 --> 00:15:30,131
That's a sentence I
have never heard before.
312
00:15:30,133 --> 00:15:31,165
Right?
313
00:15:33,869 --> 00:15:36,604
So, uh, what's with the hats?
314
00:15:36,606 --> 00:15:42,076
These are the hats of the places
that have offered me scholarships.
315
00:15:42,078 --> 00:15:44,478
Yeah. I'm just... I'm sort of
struggling with which one to pick.
316
00:15:44,480 --> 00:15:47,515
Well, you'd look good in the orange one.
317
00:15:50,118 --> 00:15:53,120
Thank you, but that's
not what this is about.
318
00:15:53,122 --> 00:15:54,288
Um.
319
00:15:54,290 --> 00:15:56,390
I just... I'm having a
hard time picking a school,
320
00:15:56,392 --> 00:15:59,493
and Dad has made it
infinitely more complicated
321
00:15:59,495 --> 00:16:01,929
by offering me the scholarship to Beloit.
322
00:16:01,931 --> 00:16:04,332
Well, how does that
make it more complicated?
323
00:16:04,334 --> 00:16:08,135
I don't know. 'Cause playing for Dad
sounds like it would be super fun.
324
00:16:08,137 --> 00:16:11,505
I've just... I haven't been excited
about playing anywhere other than SCSU.
325
00:16:11,507 --> 00:16:14,275
Great, so tell Dad that
you'll play for Beloit.
326
00:16:14,277 --> 00:16:16,277
No. It's not great.
327
00:16:16,279 --> 00:16:20,181
This is the biggest decision
that I've ever had to make, and...
328
00:16:20,183 --> 00:16:22,750
what if I'm just letting my
heart talk and not my head?
329
00:16:22,752 --> 00:16:26,253
Yeah. You're confusing me.
330
00:16:27,856 --> 00:16:35,162
Uh, this, uh touchy-feely stuff is too
touchy and too feely, so... see ya.
331
00:16:42,270 --> 00:16:44,972
Parker, not sure how much
more of this I can take.
332
00:16:44,974 --> 00:16:47,108
We're 18 hours in, and
there's no end in sight.
333
00:16:48,377 --> 00:16:51,479
Ref, is slapping a
contestant against the rules?
334
00:16:51,481 --> 00:16:52,680
I don't think so.
335
00:16:59,788 --> 00:17:01,122
Thank you.
336
00:17:03,191 --> 00:17:06,193
Minions, slap me.
337
00:17:07,129 --> 00:17:08,629
(Whistle blows) You're out!
338
00:17:10,332 --> 00:17:12,266
I can't even look at the two of you.
339
00:17:13,702 --> 00:17:18,406
Artie, I'm so tired right now.
I can't even despise you.
340
00:17:19,574 --> 00:17:21,075
Let's make a deal.
341
00:17:21,077 --> 00:17:25,012
I'm listening... sort of. I'm delirious.
342
00:17:25,014 --> 00:17:29,517
We'll share custody of the Geohawk
Free-Hands Electric Skateboard.
343
00:17:29,519 --> 00:17:31,018
Deal.
344
00:17:31,020 --> 00:17:35,089
(Laughs) Fine, and seal it
with a promissory oath.
345
00:17:35,091 --> 00:17:36,257
Parker, will you administer, please.
346
00:17:36,259 --> 00:17:38,993
Artie, repeat after me.
347
00:17:38,995 --> 00:17:40,728
I, Artie Smalls...
348
00:17:40,730 --> 00:17:42,596
I, Artie Smalls...
349
00:17:42,598 --> 00:17:45,166
have just taken my hand off Paulie.
350
00:17:45,168 --> 00:17:47,401
Have just taken my hand off Paulie. (Gasps)
351
00:17:47,403 --> 00:17:49,370
(Whistle blows) You're out!
352
00:17:49,372 --> 00:17:52,373
- (Laughs)
- (Cries) No!
353
00:17:52,375 --> 00:17:54,975
Both: Rooney-brothers-
beat-you burn.
354
00:17:56,378 --> 00:17:58,345
We have a winner!
355
00:17:58,347 --> 00:18:01,182
Oh, please. Thank you so much.
356
00:18:01,184 --> 00:18:02,349
Thank you.
357
00:18:02,351 --> 00:18:04,518
Congratulations, Joey.
358
00:18:04,520 --> 00:18:06,353
You have just won...
359
00:18:06,355 --> 00:18:09,890
Both: The Geohawk Hands-Free
Electric Skateboard!
360
00:18:09,892 --> 00:18:11,859
What? No, that's not the prize.
361
00:18:11,861 --> 00:18:13,027
What?
362
00:18:13,029 --> 00:18:16,397
Well, why else would you have a Geohawk
Hands-Free Electric Skateboard?
363
00:18:16,399 --> 00:18:20,167
To show all the kids that I'm
down with their sick rides.
364
00:18:22,437 --> 00:18:23,637
So, what is the prize?
365
00:18:23,639 --> 00:18:25,439
Oh. (Chuckles)
366
00:18:25,441 --> 00:18:27,274
Oop. (Chuckles)
367
00:18:27,276 --> 00:18:30,611
It is a certificate for a
college counseling lunch
368
00:18:30,613 --> 00:18:33,380
with Vice Principal
Rooney at Beef McGravy's.
369
00:18:34,282 --> 00:18:38,419
"Where you major in
beef and minor in gravy."
370
00:18:38,421 --> 00:18:41,155
Both: No!
371
00:18:47,229 --> 00:18:48,362
Hey, Dad.
372
00:18:49,397 --> 00:18:52,500
Can I talk to you for a
second? It's not about...
373
00:18:52,502 --> 00:18:54,602
college or basketball
or anything. It's...
374
00:18:54,604 --> 00:18:57,004
Actually, it's about, um...
375
00:18:58,240 --> 00:18:59,673
a cow.
376
00:19:01,576 --> 00:19:04,245
Nothing in the rules
against talking about a cow.
377
00:19:05,580 --> 00:19:08,816
Right, so... so
there's this cow.
378
00:19:08,818 --> 00:19:13,087
Uh, and she's trying to choose a...
379
00:19:13,089 --> 00:19:14,355
meadow.
380
00:19:14,357 --> 00:19:17,791
Um, and... and, you know,
there are a lot of really...
381
00:19:17,793 --> 00:19:22,129
great meadows, but there's only one
that's making her feel... excited.
382
00:19:22,131 --> 00:19:29,403
Okay, so... so what's this cow...
like about this particular... meadow?
383
00:19:31,506 --> 00:19:33,541
Well, there's this farmer there
384
00:19:33,543 --> 00:19:36,343
who taught her how to eat
grass when she was a calf.
385
00:19:37,879 --> 00:19:44,285
Um... and... the problem is, she just...
she can't tell if...
386
00:19:44,287 --> 00:19:46,787
she likes the meadow because
she loves her farmer...
387
00:19:49,324 --> 00:19:51,725
or, you know, because it's
the right meadow for her.
388
00:19:53,662 --> 00:19:58,532
Well, you should tell your... cow...
389
00:19:59,467 --> 00:20:05,573
as long as you give each meadow
serious consideration...
390
00:20:05,575 --> 00:20:10,244
the emotional choice can
still be the right choice.
391
00:20:12,480 --> 00:20:13,981
Yeah. Got it.
392
00:20:15,550 --> 00:20:16,817
Also...
393
00:20:19,187 --> 00:20:24,558
tell that cow... no matter what, the
farmer's always gonna love her...
394
00:20:26,194 --> 00:20:29,129
and support whatever decision she makes.
395
00:20:31,499 --> 00:20:32,833
Thanks, Dad.
396
00:20:41,376 --> 00:20:43,577
I'm choosing Beloit.
397
00:20:43,579 --> 00:20:45,913
I wanna play basketball for you.
398
00:20:45,915 --> 00:20:50,284
Yes! Yes!
399
00:20:50,286 --> 00:20:53,487
I thought that's what we were
talking about, but I wasn't sure!
400
00:20:54,422 --> 00:20:57,091
- (Grunts)
- Yeah!
401
00:20:57,093 --> 00:20:59,293
(Laughs) Oh.
402
00:20:59,295 --> 00:21:00,461
'Sup?
403
00:21:00,463 --> 00:21:02,263
(Laughs)
404
00:21:02,265 --> 00:21:05,633
- I'm going to Beloit!
- Yeah!
405
00:21:07,402 --> 00:21:11,805
I am proud to say, the music
program has been saved!
406
00:21:11,807 --> 00:21:14,508
(Cheering)
407
00:21:16,611 --> 00:21:19,546
Thanks to our generous
sponsor, Beef McGravy's,
408
00:21:19,548 --> 00:21:21,915
"where the beef is
boffo, and the gravy..."
409
00:21:21,917 --> 00:21:23,317
You know what? We reached our goal.
410
00:21:23,319 --> 00:21:25,486
I am not doing this. (Chuckles) Okay.
411
00:21:25,488 --> 00:21:28,656
Put your hands together for... The Dream.
412
00:21:28,658 --> 00:21:31,725
(Cheering)
413
00:21:31,727 --> 00:21:34,795
(Pop music plays)
414
00:21:34,797 --> 00:21:37,631
Oh-oh-oh-oh-oh-oh-oh
415
00:21:37,633 --> 00:21:41,335
Woah-oh-oh-oh-oh-oh-oh
416
00:21:41,337 --> 00:21:44,571
Oh-oh-oh-oh-oh-oh-oh
417
00:21:44,573 --> 00:21:48,842
Oh-oh-oh-
oh-oh-oh-oh
418
00:21:48,844 --> 00:21:53,514
You missed the bus
and rain is pouring down
419
00:21:53,516 --> 00:21:55,749
So you dance in the puddles
420
00:21:55,751 --> 00:22:00,187
It's been uphill
forever it seems now
421
00:22:00,189 --> 00:22:02,990
Any day you'll be at the top
422
00:22:02,992 --> 00:22:06,460
No one told you that
the story of your life
423
00:22:06,462 --> 00:22:09,430
Would have chapters that
would force you to cry
424
00:22:09,432 --> 00:22:15,602
Every ending is a new beginning
425
00:22:15,604 --> 00:22:19,373
-
Battle through the hard times
-
Yeah, yeah
426
00:22:19,375 --> 00:22:21,442
Be grateful for the good ones
427
00:22:21,444 --> 00:22:22,943
Woah-oh-oh-oh-oh
428
00:22:22,945 --> 00:22:26,113
-
Every time you fall down
-
Yeah, yeah
429
00:22:26,115 --> 00:22:29,650
Just sing in the key of life
430
00:22:29,652 --> 00:22:32,553
Oh-oh-oh-
oh-oh-oh-oh
431
00:22:32,555 --> 00:22:36,156
Oh-oh-oh-oh-oh-oh-oh
432
00:22:36,158 --> 00:22:39,526
Oh-oh-oh-
oh-oh-oh-oh
433
00:22:39,528 --> 00:22:43,464
Oh-oh-oh-oh-oh-oh-oh
434
00:22:43,466 --> 00:22:48,369
You're never out of tune if
you sing in the key of life
435
00:22:48,371 --> 00:22:50,537
(Cheering)
436
00:22:57,145 --> 00:23:00,748
Oh, Joey, we need to schedule our lunch.
437
00:23:00,750 --> 00:23:04,084
Mom, why aren't you on your Geohawk
Hands-Free Electric Skateboard
438
00:23:04,086 --> 00:23:05,686
instead of using your stupid feet?
439
00:23:05,688 --> 00:23:07,654
No, no.
440
00:23:07,656 --> 00:23:10,057
I nearly broke my neck
trying to ride that thing.
441
00:23:10,059 --> 00:23:11,158
I sold it online.
442
00:23:15,563 --> 00:23:16,897
Hello, Rooneys.
443
00:23:16,899 --> 00:23:18,332
(Laughs)
444
00:23:18,334 --> 00:23:20,401
Have fun using your stupid feet.
445
00:23:20,403 --> 00:23:21,869
(Chuckles)
446
00:23:21,871 --> 00:23:24,138
Minions, we glide.
447
00:23:28,910 --> 00:23:30,277
Mom: 'sup?
448
00:23:30,327 --> 00:23:34,877
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