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Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:02,236 --> 00:00:06,038 Thanks, Byron, that was actually really, really cool. 2 00:00:06,073 --> 00:00:07,940 I've never been to the Lincoln Memorial at night. 3 00:00:07,975 --> 00:00:11,143 jump into Lincoln's lap and take a selfie, so... 4 00:00:11,178 --> 00:00:14,146 And I've never run so fast from security. 5 00:00:14,181 --> 00:00:16,882 But it was your idea to play Truth or Dare. 6 00:00:16,917 --> 00:00:18,117 I say we keep playing. 7 00:00:18,152 --> 00:00:23,022 I dare you to go out on another date with me. 8 00:00:23,057 --> 00:00:26,759 Oh! I pick truth this time. 9 00:00:26,794 --> 00:00:28,127 Fine. Tell the truth. 10 00:00:28,162 --> 00:00:31,196 Do you want to go to the movies with me tomorrow night? 11 00:00:31,232 --> 00:00:33,799 I do, yeah. It's a date. 12 00:00:33,834 --> 00:00:36,769 - Cool. - Oh, uh, you have an eyelash. 13 00:00:36,804 --> 00:00:37,970 You know what they say, if you blow on it 14 00:00:38,005 --> 00:00:39,738 and make a wish, then your wish can come true. 15 00:00:39,774 --> 00:00:41,740 - Oh, well... - Oh-kay! 16 00:00:41,776 --> 00:00:42,975 (blows dramatically) 17 00:00:43,010 --> 00:00:45,744 I wish you would leave my daughter alone 18 00:00:45,780 --> 00:00:47,212 and go home. 19 00:00:47,248 --> 00:00:50,783 You know, Mr. Cooper, you shouldn't say your wish out loud, 20 00:00:50,818 --> 00:00:52,084 'cause it might not come true. 21 00:00:52,119 --> 00:00:54,853 And you shouldn't irritate your date's father, 22 00:00:54,889 --> 00:00:57,022 or you won't come back. 23 00:00:57,058 --> 00:00:59,191 Oh, look at the time! 24 00:00:59,226 --> 00:01:01,827 - Look at it! - I'd better get going. 25 00:01:01,862 --> 00:01:03,729 - Buh-bye. Buh-bye. - Okay. 26 00:01:03,764 --> 00:01:06,165 Buh-bye. Look at that! My wish came true! 27 00:01:06,200 --> 00:01:08,033 Hey! Ha ha! 28 00:01:08,069 --> 00:01:09,868 Dad, come on, that was not cool. 29 00:01:09,904 --> 00:01:11,837 Oh, I'm sorry, but I gotta brief you on a mission. 30 00:01:11,872 --> 00:01:14,907 Oh, what, is it Operation KC's Never Gonna Have a Boyfriend? 31 00:01:14,942 --> 00:01:17,743 Oh, that's an ongoing mission. 32 00:01:17,778 --> 00:01:18,944 - It's going on... - Ugh! 33 00:01:18,979 --> 00:01:21,747 ...and on till you're 31! 34 00:01:22,817 --> 00:01:26,018 ? Oh, when danger comes for you ? 35 00:01:26,053 --> 00:01:29,021 ? You know I'll stand beside you ? 36 00:01:29,056 --> 00:01:32,958 ? 'Cause ain't nobody keep their head so cool ? 37 00:01:32,993 --> 00:01:37,096 ? I'll always find a way, a way out of the fire ? 38 00:01:37,131 --> 00:01:41,100 ? Don't tell nobody, tell nobody ? 39 00:01:41,135 --> 00:01:43,035 ? I'm not perfect ? 40 00:01:43,070 --> 00:01:47,039 ? So many things I wanna tell you ? 41 00:01:47,074 --> 00:01:50,943 ? But I, I, I, I keep it undercover ? 42 00:01:50,978 --> 00:01:52,978 ? Livin' my life, on red alert ? 43 00:01:53,013 --> 00:01:55,147 ? Doin' my thing, gonna make it work ? 44 00:01:55,182 --> 00:01:58,050 ? Know I'm the realest, baby, I'm fearless ? 45 00:01:58,085 --> 00:01:59,818 ? But I always got your back ? 46 00:01:59,854 --> 00:02:01,787 ? Nobody can do it like I can ? 47 00:02:01,822 --> 00:02:03,789 ? I gotta find out who I am ? 48 00:02:03,824 --> 00:02:06,758 ? Ain't got to worry about me ? 49 00:02:06,794 --> 00:02:08,127 ? It's all part of the plan ? 50 00:02:08,162 --> 00:02:10,162 I keep it undercover. 51 00:02:10,197 --> 00:02:11,930 I keep it undercover. 52 00:02:15,069 --> 00:02:16,935 This is Henry Parker. 53 00:02:16,971 --> 00:02:19,771 He donated $5 million to American University, 54 00:02:19,807 --> 00:02:22,141 and they're renaming the library in his honor. 55 00:02:22,176 --> 00:02:24,143 There's been a bunch of threats against him, 56 00:02:24,178 --> 00:02:26,778 so you're going to the ceremony to protect him. 57 00:02:26,814 --> 00:02:29,982 Who would hate someone who puts money towards a library? 58 00:02:30,017 --> 00:02:33,952 [scoffs] I hope it's not Marisa. 59 00:02:33,988 --> 00:02:35,954 No, the threats were spelled correctly, 60 00:02:35,990 --> 00:02:37,990 and there were no hearts over the I's. 61 00:02:39,860 --> 00:02:41,126 Okay, so what am I supposed to do, 62 00:02:41,162 --> 00:02:43,896 like, stand in the crowd and keep an eye out on him? 63 00:02:43,931 --> 00:02:46,899 Not exactly. You're gonna be doing it from the drumline. 64 00:02:46,934 --> 00:02:49,067 Okay, yeah, one problem. I don't know how to drum. 65 00:02:49,103 --> 00:02:51,970 Which is why they should've given this assignment to me! 66 00:02:52,006 --> 00:02:54,907 I was actually on the drumline in college. 67 00:02:54,942 --> 00:02:57,843 Pop! Wah! 68 00:02:57,878 --> 00:03:00,712 I'm sorry. Wait a minute. Uh... 69 00:03:00,748 --> 00:03:02,047 Dad, are you suggesting that you can 70 00:03:02,082 --> 00:03:03,882 go undercover as a college student? 71 00:03:03,918 --> 00:03:05,851 Well, I think I could pass for a senior. 72 00:03:05,886 --> 00:03:07,953 - Pfft! - Ha! A senior what, 73 00:03:07,988 --> 00:03:09,788 a senior citizen? 74 00:03:09,823 --> 00:03:11,723 Hey, come on. 75 00:03:11,759 --> 00:03:12,925 Okay, okay, okay. 76 00:03:12,960 --> 00:03:14,993 The Organization wants you up front and center, 77 00:03:15,029 --> 00:03:17,029 which means you have to get the big drum solo, 78 00:03:17,064 --> 00:03:21,099 and you're gonna do it with these specialized drum sticks. 79 00:03:31,845 --> 00:03:36,148 Oh! Thank you, DC! 80 00:03:36,183 --> 00:03:39,151 You know, I got a real career with this. 81 00:03:39,186 --> 00:03:40,852 - Well... - Relax. 82 00:03:40,888 --> 00:03:43,922 With these, any idiot can drum like a pro. 83 00:03:43,958 --> 00:03:46,191 - Aah! Ow! - Okay. 84 00:03:46,227 --> 00:03:48,160 Apparently not any idiot. 85 00:03:52,066 --> 00:03:55,000 All right, everybody, we need to practice for the library dedication 86 00:03:55,035 --> 00:03:58,103 for some millionaire Henry Parker dude, or something. 87 00:03:58,138 --> 00:03:59,938 Look, I don't know. 88 00:03:59,974 --> 00:04:01,807 I graduate in two weeks. 89 00:04:01,842 --> 00:04:03,809 I am super checked out. 90 00:04:03,844 --> 00:04:05,744 Um, all right, where's William? 91 00:04:05,779 --> 00:04:06,845 We need to go over his solo. 92 00:04:06,880 --> 00:04:08,914 Actually, William couldn't make it, 93 00:04:08,949 --> 00:04:10,682 so I'm filling in for him. 94 00:04:10,718 --> 00:04:11,750 I'm Cassandra Bailey 95 00:04:11,785 --> 00:04:13,085 from the drumline at Georgetown. 96 00:04:13,120 --> 00:04:14,119 What's wrong with William? 97 00:04:14,154 --> 00:04:16,788 Something about his neck went out. 98 00:04:20,761 --> 00:04:22,728 But it's cool. 99 00:04:22,763 --> 00:04:24,930 He taught me his solo, so I'm good to go. 100 00:04:24,965 --> 00:04:28,700 All right. Everybody, this is Cassandra. 101 00:04:28,736 --> 00:04:30,702 I guess she'll be filling William's shoes. 102 00:04:30,738 --> 00:04:32,938 Ah, actually, brought my own shoes. 103 00:04:32,973 --> 00:04:37,009 Ringworm is no joke, people. 104 00:04:37,044 --> 00:04:39,011 This is ridiculous! 105 00:04:39,046 --> 00:04:41,113 So, a stranger walks in off the street, 106 00:04:41,148 --> 00:04:42,848 and you're just going to hand her 107 00:04:42,883 --> 00:04:44,116 the biggest drum solo of the year? 108 00:04:44,151 --> 00:04:45,917 Look, man, I know you don't know me, 109 00:04:45,953 --> 00:04:47,719 but I promise you, I got more beats 110 00:04:47,755 --> 00:04:49,054 than a farmer's market. 111 00:04:49,089 --> 00:04:51,790 Ha ha! You know, when beets are in season. 112 00:04:51,825 --> 00:04:52,891 [rimshot] 113 00:04:52,926 --> 00:04:54,726 Thank you. 114 00:04:54,762 --> 00:04:56,862 Oh, and you know what I got? 115 00:04:56,897 --> 00:04:58,797 The rulebook. 116 00:04:58,832 --> 00:05:01,667 According to section five, subsection A 117 00:05:01,702 --> 00:05:03,068 of the Drumline Charter Bylaws, 118 00:05:03,103 --> 00:05:05,937 I hereby invoke my right to a drum-off! 119 00:05:05,973 --> 00:05:07,806 - Come on, Elliot... - I invoke! 120 00:05:07,841 --> 00:05:09,941 - I invoke! - All right. 121 00:05:09,977 --> 00:05:11,843 All right, fine, if it'll shut you up. 122 00:05:11,879 --> 00:05:15,113 Cassandra, Elliot, it's a drum-off! 123 00:05:51,819 --> 00:05:56,188 Oh, ho! Cassandra, you got the solo! 124 00:05:56,223 --> 00:05:57,189 But that's not fair! 125 00:05:57,224 --> 00:05:58,824 It's okay, Elliot, 126 00:05:58,859 --> 00:06:01,026 look, you can play the solo, too, okay? 127 00:06:01,061 --> 00:06:03,795 Just "so low" nobody can hear you. 128 00:06:03,831 --> 00:06:06,732 [rimshot] 129 00:06:06,767 --> 00:06:07,899 Thank you again. 130 00:06:11,004 --> 00:06:12,971 [mournful music on TV] 131 00:06:13,006 --> 00:06:14,806 [sniffling] 132 00:06:16,777 --> 00:06:19,878 I don't know why they said this was a chick flick. 133 00:06:19,913 --> 00:06:23,081 There's a lot in it for dudes to enjoy, too. 134 00:06:23,117 --> 00:06:25,050 What're you doing? 135 00:06:25,085 --> 00:06:27,919 Oh, um, I was watching a war movie, 136 00:06:27,955 --> 00:06:31,757 The Guns of, uh... what do you want? 137 00:06:33,160 --> 00:06:35,994 - Where's KC? - On a mission. 138 00:06:36,029 --> 00:06:38,830 What? No! She's supposed to help me with my college essay! 139 00:06:38,866 --> 00:06:41,900 The deadline for the Fashion Institute of Technology is in... 140 00:06:41,935 --> 00:06:43,935 five hours. 141 00:06:43,971 --> 00:06:45,971 Good thing you didn't wait till the last minute. 142 00:06:46,006 --> 00:06:47,172 Come on, this is not funny. 143 00:06:47,207 --> 00:06:50,008 My essay needs to be as strong as it can be. 144 00:06:50,043 --> 00:06:51,843 All right, fine, I'll help you. 145 00:06:51,879 --> 00:06:53,812 Oh, thank you. 146 00:06:55,949 --> 00:06:57,983 "Dear Fashion Institute of Technology, 147 00:06:58,018 --> 00:06:59,151 Please let me in. 148 00:06:59,186 --> 00:07:01,653 Sincerely, Marisa Miller." 149 00:07:03,023 --> 00:07:04,723 I'm bad, right? 150 00:07:04,758 --> 00:07:06,992 No, not bad. Terrible. 151 00:07:07,027 --> 00:07:08,693 This isn't an essay. 152 00:07:08,729 --> 00:07:10,829 Plus, you spelled "Marisa" wrong. 153 00:07:10,864 --> 00:07:13,732 Okay, whatever. I know it stinks. 154 00:07:13,767 --> 00:07:16,101 I don't know what else to write about. 155 00:07:16,136 --> 00:07:18,904 Try writing about your life. 156 00:07:18,939 --> 00:07:20,806 Please, what am I supposed to say? 157 00:07:20,841 --> 00:07:22,908 That I woke up a few months before graduation 158 00:07:22,943 --> 00:07:24,843 and realized that I'd actually be good at design 159 00:07:24,878 --> 00:07:26,812 because my designs are really, really good, 160 00:07:26,847 --> 00:07:27,979 and I love design? 161 00:07:28,015 --> 00:07:30,081 That they should accept me into this prestigious school, 162 00:07:30,117 --> 00:07:32,017 despite the fact that I failed most of my classes, 163 00:07:32,052 --> 00:07:33,952 but it was only because I didn't really care about them. 164 00:07:33,987 --> 00:07:36,054 But I know I would be a success at F.I.T. 165 00:07:36,089 --> 00:07:38,690 because I'm actually really passionate about this 166 00:07:38,725 --> 00:07:42,093 and desperately want to learn about fashion and design! 167 00:07:42,129 --> 00:07:45,130 Yeah, that works. 168 00:07:45,165 --> 00:07:47,833 You're right, it does! 169 00:07:47,868 --> 00:07:50,902 Hey, get me one of those wrighty thingies. 170 00:07:50,938 --> 00:07:52,137 Uh, you mean a laptop? 171 00:07:52,172 --> 00:07:53,939 Yeah, yeah, one of those. 172 00:07:58,011 --> 00:08:00,779 Okay, now that you've secured at prime spot 173 00:08:00,814 --> 00:08:03,081 next to Parker at the library renaming ceremony, 174 00:08:03,116 --> 00:08:05,016 all you gotta do is protect him, 175 00:08:05,052 --> 00:08:07,752 and [mocking] pretend to play the drums. 176 00:08:08,956 --> 00:08:10,755 Really, Dad? You're still on that? 177 00:08:10,791 --> 00:08:12,924 Look, just being honest, okay, you can not pass 178 00:08:12,960 --> 00:08:14,759 for a college student anymore. 179 00:08:14,795 --> 00:08:16,127 Maybe if I shaved a little... 180 00:08:16,163 --> 00:08:18,129 Shaved off 20 years? 181 00:08:18,165 --> 00:08:20,732 I get it, KC, I'm older, 182 00:08:20,767 --> 00:08:22,067 but I can still play. 183 00:08:22,102 --> 00:08:24,135 There was a reason they called me Sticks back in college. 184 00:08:24,171 --> 00:08:26,905 Yeah, wasn't it because you ate a lot of fried mozzarella? 185 00:08:26,940 --> 00:08:29,074 Okay, there were two reasons. 186 00:08:29,109 --> 00:08:30,876 You know what? I'm gonna make sure 187 00:08:30,911 --> 00:08:32,944 all your surveillance cameras are in place. 188 00:08:32,980 --> 00:08:34,813 Maybe you should try bashing that drum 189 00:08:34,848 --> 00:08:35,981 instead of your dear old dad. 190 00:08:38,151 --> 00:08:42,721 Oh, uh, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no! 191 00:08:42,756 --> 00:08:44,990 Excuse me. You can't be on the quad 192 00:08:45,025 --> 00:08:46,758 without a proper wristband. 193 00:08:46,793 --> 00:08:47,993 They didn't give me one, 194 00:08:48,028 --> 00:08:50,061 but it's cool... I'm with the drumline. 195 00:08:50,097 --> 00:08:54,733 Oh! Well, in that case, yeah, let me just slap one on ya. 196 00:08:54,768 --> 00:08:57,736 - Ahh...! - Yeah, that's right. 197 00:08:57,771 --> 00:09:02,774 I'm Barney Feffer, Campus Security, Part-Time Division... 198 00:09:03,944 --> 00:09:05,810 and you are under campus arrest. 199 00:09:05,846 --> 00:09:08,079 - For what? - Suspicion... 200 00:09:08,115 --> 00:09:10,048 of being suspicious. 201 00:09:16,506 --> 00:09:19,474 Okay, look, I think you've made a mistake. 202 00:09:19,509 --> 00:09:22,544 As I've said, see? Check my visitor's pass. 203 00:09:22,579 --> 00:09:24,646 Student of Georgetown, Cassandra Bailey, right there. 204 00:09:24,681 --> 00:09:28,483 No, you are a liar! 205 00:09:28,518 --> 00:09:30,752 Because according to my research, 206 00:09:30,787 --> 00:09:33,755 the only Cassandra Bailey who ever attended Georgetown 207 00:09:33,790 --> 00:09:36,758 died in 1914 of the rickets. 208 00:09:36,793 --> 00:09:38,660 Oh, you know, you look pretty good 209 00:09:38,695 --> 00:09:41,630 for a 100-year-old corpse. 210 00:09:41,665 --> 00:09:42,764 Okay, look, you know what, 211 00:09:42,799 --> 00:09:45,467 I should not be telling you this... 212 00:09:45,502 --> 00:09:46,901 but I'm an undercover police officer 213 00:09:46,937 --> 00:09:48,737 sent here to protect the rich guy 214 00:09:48,772 --> 00:09:50,639 who gave all the money to the library. 215 00:09:50,674 --> 00:09:52,841 Oh, that's interesting! 216 00:09:52,876 --> 00:09:55,644 You don't look or feel like a rug, 217 00:09:55,679 --> 00:09:58,847 so why you gotta lie like one? 218 00:09:58,882 --> 00:10:01,883 Hmm, you know, you don't look or feel like a security guard, 219 00:10:01,918 --> 00:10:03,785 yet here we are! 220 00:10:05,722 --> 00:10:07,522 I can prove it to you, okay? 221 00:10:07,557 --> 00:10:10,592 I have these special drum sticks in my backpack, 222 00:10:10,627 --> 00:10:12,527 that were given to me 223 00:10:12,562 --> 00:10:17,599 by the Police Advance Technical Department, 224 00:10:17,634 --> 00:10:19,734 Musical Division. 225 00:10:21,638 --> 00:10:23,805 Do I look stupid to you? 226 00:10:23,840 --> 00:10:25,473 You really want me to answer that question? 227 00:10:25,509 --> 00:10:27,642 No. 228 00:10:27,678 --> 00:10:30,512 Just try them out, okay? They're right there in my backpack. 229 00:10:30,547 --> 00:10:32,781 Anyone who plays with them can play like a pro. 230 00:10:37,854 --> 00:10:39,554 Wow! 231 00:10:41,591 --> 00:10:44,893 Oh, well, I mean, color me embarrassed. 232 00:10:44,928 --> 00:10:47,896 I am so sorry, officer. 233 00:10:47,931 --> 00:10:49,664 Yeah, it's no problem. 234 00:10:49,700 --> 00:10:52,801 Yeah, hey, but I guess that means 235 00:10:52,836 --> 00:10:54,903 that we're working the case together. 236 00:10:54,938 --> 00:10:56,805 Oh, well, if by "working the case together" 237 00:10:56,840 --> 00:10:58,506 you mean going our separate ways 238 00:10:58,542 --> 00:10:59,741 and pretending we never met, then yeah, bingo! 239 00:10:59,776 --> 00:11:01,476 No! No, no, no, no, no! 240 00:11:01,511 --> 00:11:03,511 Please. This is my last shot 241 00:11:03,547 --> 00:11:05,880 to become a full-time security officer. 242 00:11:05,916 --> 00:11:10,585 I mean, right now, my badge, it's just a sticker. 243 00:11:11,621 --> 00:11:12,620 It's just a sticker... 244 00:11:12,656 --> 00:11:14,456 Okay. Okay, okay, you know what, 245 00:11:14,491 --> 00:11:15,590 um, how about you start 246 00:11:15,625 --> 00:11:17,726 by securing the perimeter of the campus. 247 00:11:17,761 --> 00:11:19,694 I am on it! 248 00:11:19,730 --> 00:11:22,497 Attention all units! Attention all units! 249 00:11:22,532 --> 00:11:25,800 This is Part-Time Security Officer Feffer 250 00:11:25,836 --> 00:11:28,737 calling for a complete campus lockdown! 251 00:11:28,772 --> 00:11:31,539 Okay, first, that is a bit of an overreaction, 252 00:11:31,575 --> 00:11:35,944 and secondly, that's not connected to anything. 253 00:11:35,979 --> 00:11:39,781 Oh! No wonder no one ever answers me back. 254 00:11:43,620 --> 00:11:45,487 I don't know. 255 00:11:45,522 --> 00:11:47,522 I think it's perfect. 256 00:11:47,557 --> 00:11:48,857 I would just probably add 257 00:11:48,892 --> 00:11:50,859 a few of those things that we talked about. 258 00:11:50,894 --> 00:11:53,862 Right. Commas! 259 00:11:53,897 --> 00:11:56,498 I'd say this is a great essay. 260 00:11:56,533 --> 00:11:59,534 It's real, it's from the heart, 261 00:11:59,569 --> 00:12:02,504 it's funny, and it's you. 262 00:12:02,539 --> 00:12:04,773 The Fashion Institute's gonna love it. 263 00:12:04,808 --> 00:12:06,808 Thank you so much, Ernie. 264 00:12:06,843 --> 00:12:09,444 Honestly, like, I couldn't have done this without you. 265 00:12:09,479 --> 00:12:12,480 It was my pleasure. 266 00:12:12,516 --> 00:12:13,882 [both scream] 267 00:12:13,917 --> 00:12:15,583 Oh, okay, yeah! 268 00:12:15,619 --> 00:12:16,918 I'm gonna finish this one at home. 269 00:12:16,953 --> 00:12:18,520 Good idea. Go home. 270 00:12:18,555 --> 00:12:19,687 All right, I-I'll see you later. 271 00:12:19,723 --> 00:12:20,855 - Okay. - Bye. 272 00:12:20,891 --> 00:12:21,923 [both scream] 273 00:12:21,958 --> 00:12:23,858 - I'm going now! - Please do! 274 00:12:23,894 --> 00:12:26,928 - Okay! - Hey, wait, that's my laptop! 275 00:12:26,963 --> 00:12:28,663 Okay... 276 00:12:32,803 --> 00:12:34,536 All right, everybody, get in formation. 277 00:12:34,571 --> 00:12:35,804 We're gonna start with the solos. 278 00:12:35,839 --> 00:12:37,872 Wait, wait, wait, I can't find my sticks. 279 00:12:37,908 --> 00:12:39,574 Why don't you use mine? 280 00:12:39,609 --> 00:12:41,910 You're taking everything else from me. 281 00:12:41,945 --> 00:12:43,678 No, I have to use mine! 282 00:12:43,713 --> 00:12:45,613 Um, 'cause that's gross. 283 00:12:45,649 --> 00:12:47,916 I mean, would you use somebody else's toothbrush? 284 00:12:47,951 --> 00:12:49,684 Are you planning on putting them in your mouth? 285 00:12:49,719 --> 00:12:51,519 Maybe. You don't know my routine. 286 00:12:53,557 --> 00:12:55,657 Start us off. Now. 287 00:12:57,727 --> 00:12:59,727 One, two, three, four. 288 00:12:59,763 --> 00:13:01,596 Five, six, seven, eight! 289 00:13:01,631 --> 00:13:02,864 - Cassandra! - What? 290 00:13:02,899 --> 00:13:05,467 Does this group go with, like, prime numbers 291 00:13:05,502 --> 00:13:07,569 or something? If so, no problem. 292 00:13:07,604 --> 00:13:08,870 Two, three, five, seven... 293 00:13:08,905 --> 00:13:11,539 Would you please play?! 294 00:13:11,575 --> 00:13:14,776 Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. For sure. Gotcha. 295 00:13:14,811 --> 00:13:16,878 Here we go. Solo. 296 00:13:16,913 --> 00:13:18,880 Ahem. 297 00:13:29,759 --> 00:13:31,693 Maybe your drumming would sound better 298 00:13:31,728 --> 00:13:33,661 if you did put the sticks in your mouth. 299 00:13:33,697 --> 00:13:35,897 Okay, Elliot, relax. 300 00:13:35,932 --> 00:13:37,732 It was just a warm-up, 301 00:13:37,767 --> 00:13:39,901 just a little bit of a warm-up. 302 00:13:39,936 --> 00:13:41,536 Let's get into this... 303 00:13:41,571 --> 00:13:42,871 [exhales] 304 00:13:42,906 --> 00:13:45,540 [whispers] Five, six, seven. One, two, three. 305 00:13:45,575 --> 00:13:47,876 Okay. Ahem! Mm! 306 00:14:01,491 --> 00:14:02,824 Come on, Captain! 307 00:14:02,859 --> 00:14:04,792 She's clearly choking! 308 00:14:04,828 --> 00:14:07,428 Give me back my solo! 309 00:14:07,464 --> 00:14:09,664 You got it, Elliot. You can go now. 310 00:14:09,699 --> 00:14:11,466 Oh, man. 311 00:14:16,773 --> 00:14:19,507 [playing sarcastic coda] 312 00:14:22,946 --> 00:14:24,746 You too, Cymbals? 313 00:14:24,781 --> 00:14:25,914 Thought we were friends. 314 00:14:35,392 --> 00:14:37,625 DISN Oh, Officer Bailey! Officer Bailey! 315 00:14:40,497 --> 00:14:42,463 Officer Bailey! 316 00:14:42,499 --> 00:14:44,632 Shh! What? W-What? What is it? 317 00:14:44,668 --> 00:14:47,702 -I found something! -Well, clearly it wasn't antiperspirant, 318 00:14:47,737 --> 00:14:51,539 our... I found... 319 00:14:51,575 --> 00:14:55,743 -I found your... [huffs] -Okay, I need you to stop saying, "I found your," 320 00:14:55,779 --> 00:14:58,446 - and tell me what you found. - I found your sticks. 321 00:14:58,481 --> 00:15:01,349 Oh! My sticks! Okay, thank you. 322 00:15:01,384 --> 00:15:03,284 Wait, were did you find these? 323 00:15:03,320 --> 00:15:05,220 In that drummer guy Elliot's locker. 324 00:15:05,255 --> 00:15:06,654 You know, he seemed suspicious to me, 325 00:15:06,690 --> 00:15:08,556 so I invaded his privacy, 326 00:15:08,592 --> 00:15:11,326 which I assumed was my right 327 00:15:11,361 --> 00:15:13,695 when you deputized me. 328 00:15:13,730 --> 00:15:16,698 Of course, no, no, no. Elliot is the threat. 329 00:15:16,733 --> 00:15:19,367 That's why he wanted the solo so bad. 330 00:15:19,402 --> 00:15:22,537 He's trying to get close to Parker at the dedication ceremony. 331 00:15:22,572 --> 00:15:27,275 So, what do I do next? 332 00:15:27,310 --> 00:15:28,710 Okay, listen carefully, all right? 333 00:15:28,745 --> 00:15:30,712 Hold on. 334 00:15:30,747 --> 00:15:34,415 Okay. I'm listening. 335 00:15:36,286 --> 00:15:37,652 I want you to go... 336 00:15:37,687 --> 00:15:39,587 Go. 337 00:15:39,623 --> 00:15:41,522 ...home. 338 00:15:41,558 --> 00:15:43,658 Hom... Wait a minute! 339 00:15:43,693 --> 00:15:45,660 It seems like you're trying to get rid of me. 340 00:15:45,695 --> 00:15:48,296 I want to help! I'm the one who found the drum sticks. 341 00:15:50,333 --> 00:15:54,502 Okay. Okay. I guess another set of eyes couldn't hurt. 342 00:15:54,537 --> 00:15:56,571 You get full clearance. 343 00:15:56,606 --> 00:16:00,441 Yes! Full clearance. Oh! 344 00:16:00,477 --> 00:16:03,544 I haven't been fully cleared since the arson investigation. 345 00:16:05,615 --> 00:16:08,283 Listen here, Barney, don't make me rethink this. 346 00:16:11,621 --> 00:16:13,621 - Hey, hey, hey. - What do you want now? 347 00:16:13,657 --> 00:16:16,391 I want my drum solo back. 348 00:16:21,398 --> 00:16:23,598 Too late. 349 00:16:23,633 --> 00:16:27,335 Yeah, well, I hereby invoke section five, subsection A... 350 00:16:27,370 --> 00:16:29,671 According to the amendment bylaws enacted in 1997, 351 00:16:29,706 --> 00:16:31,572 a formal petition must be presented 352 00:16:31,608 --> 00:16:33,574 in advance, for a second drum-off. 353 00:16:33,610 --> 00:16:37,445 Per the 2004 addendum to that amendment, 354 00:16:37,480 --> 00:16:39,681 it clearly states that if there are extenuating circumstances... 355 00:16:39,716 --> 00:16:41,616 You don't know what you're talking about! 356 00:16:41,651 --> 00:16:44,585 Okay, enough! Enough! 357 00:16:44,621 --> 00:16:45,653 Two weeks! 358 00:16:45,689 --> 00:16:47,655 I have two weeks of school left, 359 00:16:47,691 --> 00:16:49,390 and you're ruining it! 360 00:16:52,462 --> 00:16:53,728 So you'll both just do the solo! 361 00:16:53,763 --> 00:16:56,297 You'll both stand on either side of Parker. 362 00:16:56,333 --> 00:16:57,632 - Got it? - Nuh, I got it. 363 00:16:57,667 --> 00:17:00,401 Is that cool with you, Elliot? Does it ruin your little plan? 364 00:17:00,437 --> 00:17:03,538 My only plan is to drum my butt off at Parker's dedication ceremony. 365 00:17:03,573 --> 00:17:06,441 Don't get in my way. 366 00:17:06,476 --> 00:17:08,609 I will be in your way... 367 00:17:08,645 --> 00:17:11,412 except for the parts where I choreographed 368 00:17:11,448 --> 00:17:13,348 to be out of your way. 369 00:17:13,383 --> 00:17:14,682 Then I won't be. 370 00:17:16,419 --> 00:17:19,354 Or will I? 371 00:17:22,258 --> 00:17:23,691 [cell phone rings] 372 00:17:23,727 --> 00:17:26,294 Um, hey Bryan. 373 00:17:26,329 --> 00:17:27,528 Hey, KC! 374 00:17:27,564 --> 00:17:29,630 I'm at this thing my dad dragged me to, 375 00:17:29,666 --> 00:17:32,467 but I'll be free in time for our movie. 376 00:17:32,502 --> 00:17:34,550 -What movie? -The movie we 377 00:17:34,553 --> 00:17:36,604 said we were going to tonight. 378 00:17:36,639 --> 00:17:39,574 The movie I already bought tickets for! 379 00:17:42,512 --> 00:17:44,545 Uh, right. Right, right, right. 380 00:17:44,581 --> 00:17:46,280 Yeah, of course, that movie. 381 00:17:46,316 --> 00:17:48,649 Um, about that. I can't go. 382 00:17:48,685 --> 00:17:50,385 You're blowing me off? 383 00:17:50,420 --> 00:17:52,587 No, no. I'm not blowing you off. 384 00:17:52,622 --> 00:17:55,456 I'm just canceling at the last minute. 385 00:17:55,492 --> 00:17:58,726 Okay, that is the very definition of blowing someone off. 386 00:17:58,762 --> 00:18:02,330 No, see, listen, you didn't let me finish, okay? 387 00:18:02,365 --> 00:18:07,468 I can't go tonight because my grandma is not well. 388 00:18:07,504 --> 00:18:14,275 Yeah, have you ever heard of acute necrotizing ulcerative gingivitis? 389 00:18:14,310 --> 00:18:16,244 Oh. No, I haven't. 390 00:18:16,279 --> 00:18:18,546 Then that's what she has. 391 00:18:18,581 --> 00:18:21,382 I-I am so sorry. 392 00:18:21,418 --> 00:18:23,251 Go take care of your grandma. 393 00:18:23,286 --> 00:18:24,652 - Thank you. - I hope she feels better. 394 00:18:24,687 --> 00:18:25,653 Thank you. 395 00:18:30,260 --> 00:18:31,559 [no audible dialogue] 396 00:18:33,663 --> 00:18:35,396 [door opens] 397 00:18:36,433 --> 00:18:37,498 Heyyy! 398 00:18:37,534 --> 00:18:39,300 How's it going? 399 00:18:39,335 --> 00:18:41,569 Uh, did you get your application in? 400 00:18:41,604 --> 00:18:43,337 I did! I did! Thank you! 401 00:18:43,373 --> 00:18:44,672 Thank you so much for your help. 402 00:18:44,707 --> 00:18:46,407 It was my pleasure. 403 00:18:46,443 --> 00:18:47,608 So we're not gonna talk about what happened! 404 00:18:47,644 --> 00:18:49,410 - Works for me. - Oh, me too! 405 00:18:49,446 --> 00:18:51,446 - See you later. - Ah, see you. 406 00:18:51,481 --> 00:18:53,481 [both scream] 407 00:18:53,516 --> 00:18:57,552 Okay, we clearly need to talk about what's happening. 408 00:18:57,587 --> 00:19:00,188 Um, what is going on? 409 00:19:00,223 --> 00:19:02,223 I mean, I barely like you, 410 00:19:02,258 --> 00:19:04,492 and I certainly don't "like you, like you." 411 00:19:04,527 --> 00:19:07,662 And I feel the same way about you... times ten! 412 00:19:09,299 --> 00:19:10,565 So what is going on here? 413 00:19:10,600 --> 00:19:13,434 I don't know. I don't know. 414 00:19:13,470 --> 00:19:18,239 Um, maybe it's because you're really passionate 415 00:19:18,274 --> 00:19:19,640 about going to this school, 416 00:19:19,676 --> 00:19:22,643 and somehow that passion 417 00:19:22,679 --> 00:19:25,680 spilled over into your appreciation? 418 00:19:25,715 --> 00:19:28,683 Yes! Yes! My passion 419 00:19:28,718 --> 00:19:31,352 spilled over into my appreciation, 420 00:19:31,387 --> 00:19:32,687 and onto your lips! 421 00:19:32,722 --> 00:19:34,455 That makes perfect sense. 422 00:19:34,491 --> 00:19:35,623 - It was nothing! - Less than nothing. 423 00:19:35,658 --> 00:19:36,657 I'm so glad we cleared that up! 424 00:19:36,693 --> 00:19:37,692 Me too! 425 00:19:46,536 --> 00:19:49,237 [cheering] 426 00:19:49,272 --> 00:19:51,539 Congratulations to our benefactor 427 00:19:51,574 --> 00:19:53,641 and to the man we're celebrating here today, 428 00:19:53,676 --> 00:19:57,645 Mr., uh, Henry Parker! 429 00:19:57,680 --> 00:20:00,248 [cheering] 430 00:20:00,283 --> 00:20:01,716 And now, in a special salute, 431 00:20:01,751 --> 00:20:05,453 the American University Drumline! 432 00:21:03,546 --> 00:21:06,614 I know you stole my sticks and put them in your locker. 433 00:21:06,649 --> 00:21:10,318 What? What, locker, what are you, in high school? 434 00:21:10,353 --> 00:21:11,419 I don't have a locker. 435 00:21:11,454 --> 00:21:14,555 Oh. Yeah, right, that makes sense. 436 00:21:14,591 --> 00:21:17,725 Wait, if it wasn't you, then... 437 00:21:21,397 --> 00:21:23,497 Barney Feffer. 438 00:21:23,533 --> 00:21:26,367 Congratulations! I'm giving you your solo back! 439 00:21:26,402 --> 00:21:28,402 It was never yours to give! 440 00:21:29,606 --> 00:21:31,339 Drumline sounds amazing. 441 00:21:31,374 --> 00:21:33,341 Just wish we could see it better. 442 00:21:35,545 --> 00:21:36,744 Ooh! 443 00:21:36,779 --> 00:21:39,647 So, you played stupid and I fell for it. 444 00:21:39,682 --> 00:21:42,650 Played stupid, or am stupid? 445 00:21:42,685 --> 00:21:45,586 Either way, you fell for it. 446 00:21:45,622 --> 00:21:47,555 Well, what's your beef with Parker? 447 00:21:47,590 --> 00:21:51,592 It all started 35 years ago at this very university. 448 00:21:51,628 --> 00:21:55,363 Parker and I were assigned the same dorm room. 449 00:21:55,398 --> 00:21:57,765 I distinctly called dibs on the top bunk, but Parker! 450 00:21:57,800 --> 00:21:59,667 Okay. Okay. I've lost interest. 451 00:21:59,702 --> 00:22:02,503 Okay, I'm taking you in. Let's go. 452 00:22:02,538 --> 00:22:04,405 Yeow! 453 00:22:18,554 --> 00:22:20,388 Nice drum roll, Barney. 454 00:22:39,409 --> 00:22:41,375 Oh, come on. 455 00:22:42,779 --> 00:22:44,445 Well, look at that, Barney. 456 00:22:44,480 --> 00:22:47,314 You just got upgraded to maximum security. 457 00:22:49,719 --> 00:22:52,319 Wow, Dad, that was amazing. 458 00:22:52,355 --> 00:22:53,654 I'm so glad that we came. 459 00:22:57,560 --> 00:23:01,395 KC? What are you doing here? 460 00:23:04,300 --> 00:23:05,466 Rob, your name's on TV! 461 00:23:05,516 --> 00:23:10,066 Repair and Synchronization by Easy Subtitles Synchronizer 1.0.0.0 33343

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