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WWW.MY-SUBS.CO
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- Synced and corrected by Firefly -
- www.MY-SUBS.com -
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- That was all right, wasn't it?
- Mm-hmm. Yeah. Yes.
3
00:00:18,060 --> 00:00:20,727
- I think it's better now, isn't it?
- I agree. Yeah.
4
00:00:20,729 --> 00:00:24,856
Well, pressure's off, innit?
There's no cycles, ovulation windows.
5
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I feel like I'm a
professional tennis player...
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- Mm.
- ... who's retired.
7
00:00:30,864 --> 00:00:32,364
And now that I'm playing for fun,
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00:00:32,366 --> 00:00:36,196
I've sort of, like, fallen back
in love with the game.
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It's nice not to use
protection as well, innit?
10
00:00:39,581 --> 00:00:42,364
- Mm-hmm.
- You know, you just gotta,
11
00:00:42,366 --> 00:00:44,709
you know, plug and play.
12
00:00:44,711 --> 00:00:48,088
I think it's just nature
evening things up.
13
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Blind people get great hearing,
infertile people get great sex!
14
00:00:55,973 --> 00:00:57,023
Hello.
15
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Right.
16
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Jason!
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Jason!
18
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What?
19
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It's from the adoption people.
20
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- Is it?
- Yeah.
21
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- Don't you want to open it?
- No, no. I know what it says.
22
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It says we don't give children
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to people who admit they drink
too much, smoke and have no money.
24
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Okay. All right.
25
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It's fine, it's fine. Just tell me.
26
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- Jason.
- It says... It says...
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... nothing. It's just more
forms, by the looks of it.
28
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- What?
- Yeah.
29
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- They didn't reject us?
- No.
30
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- We're still in with a chance?
- It looks like it, yeah.
31
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- How?
- I don't know.
32
00:01:50,986 --> 00:01:53,153
Maybe they're so desperate for
people, they'll take anyone.
33
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Oh, that's so great.
34
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Mm!
35
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Look, I think this is gonna be
a pretty long, drawn-out process.
36
00:02:04,583 --> 00:02:07,918
So maybe we should just, you know,
pace ourselves, take it easy.
37
00:02:07,920 --> 00:02:09,461
- Do you know what I mean?
- Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah.
38
00:02:09,463 --> 00:02:11,505
- Absolutely, absolutely.
- Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.
39
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I'm gonna go get a pen. I'm so excited.
40
00:02:38,492 --> 00:02:39,574
- Jason.
- Yeah.
41
00:02:39,576 --> 00:02:41,576
- We need to talk.
- Why, is something wrong?
42
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You got problems, dude.
43
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You "have" problems,
dude. Have problems.
44
00:02:48,836 --> 00:02:50,325
Hi.
45
00:02:50,327 --> 00:02:53,171
Do we have to have the talk again?
46
00:02:53,173 --> 00:02:56,466
Alisha, I've got to vary the
lessons. They're getting bored.
47
00:02:56,468 --> 00:02:58,134
How many times?
48
00:02:58,136 --> 00:02:59,872
You cannot teach English
49
00:02:59,874 --> 00:03:02,264
through Rihanna songs
and football chants.
50
00:03:02,266 --> 00:03:05,517
This is a business,
not Dead Poets Society.
51
00:03:05,519 --> 00:03:06,601
I know, but it...
52
00:03:06,603 --> 00:03:09,563
Look, I have half the budget
and half the time I need
53
00:03:09,565 --> 00:03:11,731
to do this job properly.
54
00:03:11,733 --> 00:03:16,027
And I'm too exhausted to argue.
Just work the textbook.
55
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Yeah, but the textbooks are old.
They need new ones.
56
00:03:17,990 --> 00:03:19,573
Well, we can't afford them.
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I mean, the maps have
still got Yugoslavia on 'em.
58
00:03:21,869 --> 00:03:26,955
Okay, let me explain something
to you: Britain is done.
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00:03:26,957 --> 00:03:28,331
It is done.
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It is old, and it is dying,
and no one is coming here.
61
00:03:32,546 --> 00:03:35,088
And when people don't come,
neither does their money.
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00:03:35,090 --> 00:03:36,918
Alisha, we promise these kids a lot.
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We're not meeting their expectations.
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00:03:38,760 --> 00:03:42,345
They're from Eastern Europe.
They don't have any expectations.
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00:03:42,347 --> 00:03:46,016
I saw two of them in the toilets
taking a selfie with a Dyson Airblade.
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00:03:46,018 --> 00:03:47,098
No, you didn't.
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00:03:48,145 --> 00:03:49,603
Just get them out and into jobs
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so they can send money back
to their haggard families.
69
00:03:54,985 --> 00:03:58,320
Yeah, I know you wanna be at the birth,
70
00:03:58,322 --> 00:04:02,162
but it's just a very busy time for
us and we just don't have the cars.
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00:04:03,493 --> 00:04:05,577
Right. Yeah, no.
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00:04:05,579 --> 00:04:08,830
I know you're frustrated.
I do. I understand that.
73
00:04:08,832 --> 00:04:10,457
But this really isn't our fault.
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00:04:10,459 --> 00:04:12,626
You know, maybe your sister
shouldn't have got pregnant
75
00:04:12,628 --> 00:04:14,838
exactly nine months
before a bank holiday.
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00:04:15,589 --> 00:04:16,759
Do you know what I mean?
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00:04:18,716 --> 00:04:21,760
Is Ruby about? Just need her
to proofread some contracts.
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00:04:21,762 --> 00:04:25,055
Oh, I could do that if you want.
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00:04:25,057 --> 00:04:26,977
Oh. Okay, yeah.
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Uh...
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00:04:29,311 --> 00:04:31,521
No, it's okay. I'll, uh...
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00:04:32,356 --> 00:04:35,023
- Yeah. No. Thanks, though.
- Oh. Oh.
83
00:04:36,568 --> 00:04:39,988
Uh-huh. Well, I literally
don't know how to help you.
84
00:04:42,077 --> 00:04:45,037
Yeah. Have you thought
about getting the bus?
85
00:04:47,694 --> 00:04:51,114
Right, and exactly how far
is Cornwall from Scotland?
86
00:04:53,014 --> 00:04:54,474
Oh, yeah, that is far.
87
00:04:59,383 --> 00:05:00,843
Let's see what we've got then.
88
00:05:02,469 --> 00:05:03,969
- Crisps?
- Yeah.
89
00:05:03,971 --> 00:05:05,470
- And 7UP?
- Lovely.
90
00:05:05,472 --> 00:05:07,682
It's a support group, not a sleepover.
91
00:05:08,892 --> 00:05:12,269
- Oh, my God, barbecue?
- Well, we love barbecue.
92
00:05:12,271 --> 00:05:13,854
They're French.
93
00:05:13,856 --> 00:05:15,480
Did you get them from
the guy at the market
94
00:05:15,482 --> 00:05:17,107
that we said we weren't
gonna go to anymore?
95
00:05:17,109 --> 00:05:18,441
- He's all right.
- Jase.
96
00:05:18,443 --> 00:05:21,570
He sold me some tartar sauce
that was best before 2002.
97
00:05:21,572 --> 00:05:23,238
Barbecue.
98
00:05:23,240 --> 00:05:25,532
They're not... They're
not sophisticated.
99
00:05:25,534 --> 00:05:28,243
- Why didn't you get the posh flavors?
- What's the posh flavors?
100
00:05:28,245 --> 00:05:29,327
Right. It goes:
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00:05:29,329 --> 00:05:32,414
sea salt and cracked black pepper,
salt and balsamic vinegar,
102
00:05:32,416 --> 00:05:35,041
lightly salted, cheese
and onion, prawn cocktail,
103
00:05:35,043 --> 00:05:38,083
and then chicken at the
bottom, and then barbecue.
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00:05:42,050 --> 00:05:44,509
Jase, you've got a stain.
105
00:05:44,511 --> 00:05:46,887
Oh. Yeah, I know.
106
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I wetted it and then it was damp,
107
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so I couldn't see if it
was still there or not.
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Hang on...
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- Made it worse.
- Yeah, I know.
110
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Don't worry about it.
111
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Hello.
112
00:06:01,945 --> 00:06:04,070
We didn't bring a rug.
113
00:06:04,072 --> 00:06:06,198
- All right, mate?
- Mm.
114
00:06:06,200 --> 00:06:08,158
- Hiya.
- Hello, hi. Marcus.
115
00:06:08,160 --> 00:06:09,618
- I'm Nikki.
- Hello, Nikki.
116
00:06:09,620 --> 00:06:10,702
Hello, Marcus. Jason.
117
00:06:10,704 --> 00:06:12,412
- Jason, nice to meet you.
- Yeah, nice to meet you.
118
00:06:12,414 --> 00:06:15,084
- Brought some things for the...
- Oh, thank you. Um...
119
00:06:17,836 --> 00:06:19,878
Yeah, you know, should we
pop this under the table
120
00:06:19,880 --> 00:06:21,560
- outta the sun for now?
- Yeah, okay.
121
00:06:22,466 --> 00:06:23,965
There we go. Thank you.
122
00:06:23,967 --> 00:06:26,218
- Is this all up for grabs, Marcus? Yeah?
- You help yourself.
123
00:06:26,220 --> 00:06:27,469
- Yeah, yeah.
- Thank you.
124
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Lovely.
125
00:06:29,973 --> 00:06:32,098
- Cracking spread.
- Mm.
126
00:06:32,100 --> 00:06:34,392
So, uh, are all these people adopting?
127
00:06:34,394 --> 00:06:35,404
Trying to.
128
00:06:36,163 --> 00:06:38,070
The borough's pretty oversubscribed.
129
00:06:38,072 --> 00:06:39,469
- God.
- Bloody hell.
130
00:06:39,471 --> 00:06:40,815
Excuse me, I'm just gonna...
131
00:06:40,817 --> 00:06:42,777
- Okay.
- Fair, mate.
132
00:06:45,030 --> 00:06:47,197
Never really thought about
there being competition.
133
00:06:47,199 --> 00:06:49,329
Don't worry. We got game.
134
00:06:50,244 --> 00:06:51,743
Jason, really.
135
00:06:51,745 --> 00:06:52,911
Out of all these people here,
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00:06:52,913 --> 00:06:55,473
why would they give a kid to a
bloke who just licked his own top?
137
00:06:56,333 --> 00:06:59,125
There's a razor-thin line between
the T-shirts you wear to bed
138
00:06:59,127 --> 00:07:00,710
and the ones you wear during the day.
139
00:07:00,712 --> 00:07:01,712
Step it up.
140
00:07:05,634 --> 00:07:07,092
Well, I suppose we're all just waiting
141
00:07:07,094 --> 00:07:09,678
to see the long-term effects of
the regional adoption agencies.
142
00:07:09,680 --> 00:07:10,762
Yeah.
143
00:07:10,764 --> 00:07:12,806
The Adoption Support Fund's
been given 12 million,
144
00:07:12,808 --> 00:07:15,688
- which is, you know, a drop in the ocean.
- It's amazing.
145
00:07:17,187 --> 00:07:18,687
Right, yeah. Of course.
146
00:07:19,606 --> 00:07:21,189
So, what is it that you both do?
147
00:07:21,191 --> 00:07:23,024
I'm an educational consultant.
148
00:07:23,026 --> 00:07:24,860
Oh! Cool.
149
00:07:24,862 --> 00:07:26,702
- And...
- Journalist, political.
150
00:07:29,241 --> 00:07:31,241
Financial advisor.
151
00:07:31,243 --> 00:07:33,410
My wife's an artist, ceramics.
152
00:07:33,412 --> 00:07:34,619
Cardiologist.
153
00:07:34,621 --> 00:07:35,787
Solicitor.
154
00:07:35,789 --> 00:07:38,999
A filmmaker. Wildlife documentaries.
155
00:07:39,001 --> 00:07:40,381
Oh, I work for the council.
156
00:07:41,170 --> 00:07:42,752
Oh. Okay.
157
00:07:42,754 --> 00:07:44,376
Yeah, I'm the strategic lead
158
00:07:44,378 --> 00:07:46,998
for business development
and commercial partnerships.
159
00:07:50,429 --> 00:07:52,095
Have you done much prep reading?
160
00:07:52,097 --> 00:07:55,390
Um, have you read The Connected Parent?
161
00:07:55,392 --> 00:07:57,601
- No.
- It's great on bonding.
162
00:07:57,603 --> 00:07:58,685
- Is it?
- No.
163
00:07:58,687 --> 00:08:01,313
Five Stages of Infant Attachment?
164
00:08:01,315 --> 00:08:04,107
I think we said we wanted to wait
for the film on that one, didn't we?
165
00:08:06,945 --> 00:08:09,196
We've been told they like you
to have experience with kids,
166
00:08:09,198 --> 00:08:10,780
so we've been volunteering.
167
00:08:10,782 --> 00:08:13,450
Yeah, and luckily my work
gives me a lot of exposure.
168
00:08:13,452 --> 00:08:15,452
Yeah, um, what is it
that you do exactly?
169
00:08:15,454 --> 00:08:16,953
Educational consultant?
170
00:08:16,955 --> 00:08:19,915
I work with adults with learning
and behavioral difficulties.
171
00:08:19,917 --> 00:08:21,583
No way. So do I.
172
00:08:21,585 --> 00:08:23,085
- Really?
- Yeah.
173
00:08:23,921 --> 00:08:26,379
My boss.
174
00:08:26,381 --> 00:08:28,471
Your boss has behavioral difficulties?
175
00:08:29,877 --> 00:08:31,066
No.
176
00:08:31,068 --> 00:08:34,054
- Sorry, I don't understand.
- It was a joke.
177
00:08:34,056 --> 00:08:35,555
- I was just...
- Ah!
178
00:08:35,557 --> 00:08:38,892
'Cause she's a pain in the
ass. No, she's all there.
179
00:08:38,894 --> 00:08:40,354
All right.
180
00:08:42,481 --> 00:08:44,861
So, uh, so what do you do?
181
00:08:46,151 --> 00:08:48,360
Me? I teach English
as a foreign language.
182
00:08:48,362 --> 00:08:52,572
Oh! I did that for a summer
when I was 18. Yeah.
183
00:08:52,574 --> 00:08:54,874
Yeah. Lot of fun. Lot of fun.
184
00:08:57,329 --> 00:08:59,371
Oh, God.
185
00:08:59,373 --> 00:09:01,289
We're competing against
the cream here, Jase.
186
00:09:01,291 --> 00:09:03,708
Yeah. Maybe we should just
move to a shittier borough, hey?
187
00:09:03,710 --> 00:09:05,210
Yeah, maybe.
188
00:09:05,212 --> 00:09:06,748
I mean, that Ben man talked to me
189
00:09:06,750 --> 00:09:08,713
about American politics for 30 minutes.
190
00:09:08,715 --> 00:09:10,632
- Oh, God.
- I couldn't talk about any politics
191
00:09:10,634 --> 00:09:11,934
for 30 minutes.
192
00:09:12,761 --> 00:09:15,637
Well, not unless I talked
really, really slowly.
193
00:09:15,639 --> 00:09:18,849
Hang on. Magic.
194
00:09:29,319 --> 00:09:32,571
So, this group's a little like prison.
195
00:09:32,573 --> 00:09:35,240
You're not supposed to ask
why people are here, but...
196
00:09:35,242 --> 00:09:37,659
Well, we had some fertility issues.
197
00:09:37,661 --> 00:09:39,619
Oh, I'm so sorry.
198
00:09:39,621 --> 00:09:40,996
- Cheesecake's out.
- Oh.
199
00:09:40,998 --> 00:09:42,914
- Hello.
- This is Luke. Luke, this is Jason.
200
00:09:42,916 --> 00:09:44,996
- Jason. How are you, mate?
- Yeah, nice to meet you.
201
00:09:45,752 --> 00:09:48,003
- IVF?
- Oh, yeah.
202
00:09:48,005 --> 00:09:50,547
- We tried it, but it's complicated.
- Mm.
203
00:09:50,549 --> 00:09:53,008
Juice not worth the squeeze,
Luke, if you know what I mean.
204
00:09:53,010 --> 00:09:54,926
My window wasn't as
big as other people's.
205
00:09:54,928 --> 00:09:57,012
- No.
- I should have been sluttier in my 20s.
206
00:09:57,014 --> 00:10:00,184
- Well, you gave it a good go.
- Yeah, I did.
207
00:10:02,769 --> 00:10:04,519
So, why are you adopting?
208
00:10:04,521 --> 00:10:07,522
- Uh, we both have penises.
- Oh.
209
00:10:07,524 --> 00:10:10,066
- That makes sense, yeah.
- And where are you at with it all?
210
00:10:10,068 --> 00:10:11,484
- We're going for our second.
- Wow.
211
00:10:11,486 --> 00:10:12,569
- Really?
- Yeah.
212
00:10:12,571 --> 00:10:16,072
- Uh, this is Jade, our first.
- Stop it.
213
00:10:16,074 --> 00:10:17,782
- Gorge.
- Absolutely beautiful.
214
00:10:17,784 --> 00:10:19,951
- She's so beautiful.
- Actually, really beautiful, man.
215
00:10:19,953 --> 00:10:23,288
- I hate you so much.
- Yeah, we've been really lucky.
216
00:10:23,290 --> 00:10:25,624
Passed panel first time.
Got the child of our dreams.
217
00:10:25,626 --> 00:10:27,834
Getting on really well
with the biological parents.
218
00:10:27,836 --> 00:10:29,294
That is so good to hear.
219
00:10:29,296 --> 00:10:32,714
Honestly, it's amazing.
You're gonna love it.
220
00:10:32,716 --> 00:10:35,550
Oh, God. I mean, can we
adopt you? Like, is that...
221
00:10:35,552 --> 00:10:36,927
Well, I only wanna give you a hug.
222
00:10:36,929 --> 00:10:38,678
- Is he available?
- I'm gonna do it. I'm giving a hug.
223
00:10:38,680 --> 00:10:41,223
Here, Jase. Can you
hold my drink? Come here.
224
00:10:41,225 --> 00:10:42,307
This is good.
225
00:10:42,309 --> 00:10:45,149
- All right. Careful, he's not on fire.
- Mm.
226
00:10:45,938 --> 00:10:48,021
All right, should we go? Just...
227
00:10:50,359 --> 00:10:53,610
- Handshake. All right, then.
- Come here.
228
00:10:53,612 --> 00:10:54,612
This is nice.
229
00:10:59,660 --> 00:11:00,742
Thanks, guys.
230
00:11:00,744 --> 00:11:01,754
Mm.
231
00:11:03,497 --> 00:11:07,791
- I see you met, uh, Luke and Kwame.
- Yeah, so nice, so positive.
232
00:11:07,793 --> 00:11:10,085
Yeah. But then, I would be too.
233
00:11:10,087 --> 00:11:14,757
I think it's a bit easier when
you're, you know, black.
234
00:11:16,343 --> 00:11:19,469
Yeah, this area has a
lot of minority kids,
235
00:11:19,471 --> 00:11:22,848
and, uh, they like
to, you know, "match".
236
00:11:22,850 --> 00:11:25,020
Yeah. Well, I mean, that
makes sense, doesn't it?
237
00:11:29,648 --> 00:11:30,728
Good to go?
238
00:11:33,694 --> 00:11:34,904
Have you got worms?
239
00:11:35,988 --> 00:11:37,612
They're just a couple of racists.
240
00:11:37,614 --> 00:11:40,323
The sort of people who think
immigrants get all the council houses.
241
00:11:40,325 --> 00:11:42,993
- No, they didn't look racist.
- You can't tell anymore.
242
00:11:42,995 --> 00:11:45,078
It's all white-collar now.
It's been gentrified.
243
00:11:45,080 --> 00:11:46,705
We're at the bottom of the queue.
244
00:11:46,707 --> 00:11:51,209
They all go to museums and art
galleries. They have degrees.
245
00:11:51,211 --> 00:11:53,628
- Degrees don't mean anything.
- Mm.
246
00:11:53,630 --> 00:11:55,672
Yeah, you can say that.
You all have one.
247
00:11:55,674 --> 00:11:57,883
Yeah, but theirs are from Portsmouth.
248
00:11:57,885 --> 00:12:00,677
- It's a good uni.
- It's a conference center with a motto.
249
00:12:00,679 --> 00:12:03,471
It's top 15 in sports science.
250
00:12:03,473 --> 00:12:05,640
He's literally got a degree in burpees.
251
00:12:05,642 --> 00:12:08,018
This doesn't work when I do it.
252
00:12:08,020 --> 00:12:09,100
Can you...
253
00:12:11,356 --> 00:12:13,276
- Shh, shh, shh.
- Doesn't mean anything.
254
00:12:14,443 --> 00:12:15,533
Yeah.
255
00:12:16,492 --> 00:12:18,098
You should read The
Connected Parent though.
256
00:12:18,100 --> 00:12:19,100
It's great on bonding.
257
00:12:21,700 --> 00:12:27,370
Turn to page 22 in the textbooks.
We're gonna look at, um, greetings.
258
00:12:27,372 --> 00:12:29,372
Formal and informal greet... Yes?
259
00:12:29,374 --> 00:12:31,958
- The answers are already in here.
- What?
260
00:12:31,960 --> 00:12:35,295
Someone has written already
the answers in the book.
261
00:12:35,297 --> 00:12:36,379
- Really?
- Yeah.
262
00:12:36,381 --> 00:12:38,971
- Has everyone got that?
- Yes.
263
00:12:40,135 --> 00:12:43,715
I'm sorry. Um, all right. So let...
264
00:12:44,515 --> 00:12:46,097
Everyone put their left
hand over the answers
265
00:12:46,099 --> 00:12:47,349
that have been written in their book.
266
00:12:47,351 --> 00:12:48,851
What is "tosser"?
267
00:12:49,770 --> 00:12:51,228
What? What's "tosser"?
268
00:12:51,230 --> 00:12:52,650
Tosser.
269
00:12:53,982 --> 00:12:55,822
Well, it's... Let's have a look.
270
00:13:00,364 --> 00:13:01,454
Wow, yeah.
271
00:13:02,241 --> 00:13:05,742
This is quite offensive. Um...
272
00:13:05,744 --> 00:13:09,464
We need new books. We
pay our money for this.
273
00:13:11,083 --> 00:13:12,173
I know.
274
00:13:13,418 --> 00:13:16,169
Listen, though, do you
know what? This is good.
275
00:13:16,171 --> 00:13:17,671
Actually, this is good,
276
00:13:17,673 --> 00:13:19,881
'cause if you're gonna
work with English people,
277
00:13:19,883 --> 00:13:22,092
then you're gonna need
to know these words.
278
00:13:22,094 --> 00:13:27,180
Um... Okay, right. No,
this is... this is good.
279
00:13:27,182 --> 00:13:30,767
Toss-er. Um...
280
00:13:30,769 --> 00:13:33,228
Any other words you've come across
that you might not understand?
281
00:13:33,230 --> 00:13:34,230
"Knobhead"?
282
00:13:35,440 --> 00:13:36,440
Knobhead.
283
00:13:37,484 --> 00:13:38,650
It's a silent K.
284
00:13:38,652 --> 00:13:41,662
Knob as in "penis", head.
285
00:13:42,823 --> 00:13:44,114
Lovely. Anything else?
286
00:13:44,116 --> 00:13:46,116
"Wanker".
287
00:13:46,118 --> 00:13:48,034
- "Wanker".
- Wanker.
288
00:13:48,036 --> 00:13:49,369
Wanker, exactly.
289
00:13:49,371 --> 00:13:55,541
Wank-er. Wanker. There you go.
290
00:13:58,172 --> 00:13:59,172
Hi.
291
00:14:33,749 --> 00:14:34,873
So...
292
00:14:34,875 --> 00:14:38,084
... it's basically a competition
and the winner gets a kid?
293
00:14:38,086 --> 00:14:41,379
Um, try not to think
of it like that, Jen.
294
00:14:41,381 --> 00:14:44,049
- Oh, so everyone gets a kid?
- No.
295
00:14:44,051 --> 00:14:45,431
So, how do they decide?
296
00:14:46,261 --> 00:14:48,304
It's just based on how
good a candidate you are.
297
00:14:48,306 --> 00:14:51,886
Right. Does sound like a competition.
298
00:14:54,061 --> 00:14:56,770
Sort of think it can't be
that hard if Madonna did it.
299
00:14:56,772 --> 00:14:58,897
No, I don't... I don't think
she went through the council.
300
00:14:58,899 --> 00:15:00,479
She... She sort of went direct.
301
00:15:01,401 --> 00:15:04,152
- Ruby, have you got those contracts?
- The ones you wanted proofread?
302
00:15:04,154 --> 00:15:05,987
Fantastic. Thank you. Oh, you're great.
303
00:15:05,989 --> 00:15:07,239
- Thank you. Cheers.
- Anytime.
304
00:15:20,212 --> 00:15:21,461
- Hey.
- Oh. Hello.
305
00:15:21,463 --> 00:15:24,881
- Want some?
- I've just... I'm trying to give up.
306
00:15:24,883 --> 00:15:26,132
- Oh.
- Yeah.
307
00:15:26,134 --> 00:15:27,224
Good to you.
308
00:15:34,685 --> 00:15:37,765
- Sorry to be complaining.
- Oh, that's okay. I...
309
00:15:39,690 --> 00:15:41,439
I need to speak better for work.
310
00:15:41,441 --> 00:15:42,941
Oh. Do you have work?
311
00:15:42,943 --> 00:15:44,484
- Yeah.
- Mm.
312
00:15:44,486 --> 00:15:46,196
In restaurant only.
313
00:15:47,531 --> 00:15:49,781
What would you like to do?
Where would you like to work?
314
00:15:49,783 --> 00:15:52,158
- I'm a teacher.
- Ah, no way.
315
00:15:52,160 --> 00:15:55,203
Yeah. Was a teacher at home.
316
00:15:55,205 --> 00:15:57,205
I just need to...
317
00:15:57,207 --> 00:15:58,290
Speak better.
318
00:15:58,292 --> 00:15:59,292
- Yeah.
- Yeah.
319
00:16:00,460 --> 00:16:04,421
Right. Well, listen, you're not
gonna get what you need here.
320
00:16:04,423 --> 00:16:08,675
So, you should maybe think
about some, um, private tuition.
321
00:16:08,677 --> 00:16:11,011
Oh. I have no money.
322
00:16:11,013 --> 00:16:13,930
Right. Which you can't get
until you get a better job,
323
00:16:13,932 --> 00:16:16,558
- which you can't get until you can, uh...
- Speak better.
324
00:16:16,560 --> 00:16:19,436
Right, yeah, yes.
325
00:16:19,438 --> 00:16:20,438
Yeah.
326
00:16:24,443 --> 00:16:26,818
Listen, if you want, I could
give you some extra help.
327
00:16:26,820 --> 00:16:29,487
- I have no money, remember?
- Yeah, I know.
328
00:16:29,489 --> 00:16:32,115
But I don't need money. So...
329
00:16:32,117 --> 00:16:34,157
- What? Really?
- Yeah, it's fine.
330
00:16:36,705 --> 00:16:38,038
Thank you.
331
00:16:38,040 --> 00:16:39,960
- It's okay.
- Cool.
332
00:16:44,421 --> 00:16:47,797
Don't worry too much
about reading all of these.
333
00:16:47,799 --> 00:16:50,175
It's 80% making sure
you've got wet wipes.
334
00:16:50,177 --> 00:16:51,510
And it'll be easier for you
335
00:16:51,512 --> 00:16:53,720
'cause you can just drink
all the way through it.
336
00:16:53,722 --> 00:16:56,432
I mean, I sort of did too,
but you're not supposed to.
337
00:16:59,520 --> 00:17:01,360
And your body's not gonna change.
338
00:17:02,189 --> 00:17:04,396
Oh, I really miss my tits.
339
00:17:04,398 --> 00:17:06,691
I used to have spectacular tits.
340
00:17:06,693 --> 00:17:09,693
I mean, I love my kids.
I wouldn't swap my kids for my tits.
341
00:17:09,695 --> 00:17:11,112
Okay, well, no. That's good.
342
00:17:11,114 --> 00:17:14,574
But if I could just have
my tits at, like, weekends
343
00:17:14,576 --> 00:17:17,327
and then get the kids back on
Monday, then I'd probably do that.
344
00:17:25,921 --> 00:17:28,011
I don't think it's
supposed to feel like this.
345
00:17:30,592 --> 00:17:33,182
It didn't with Lauren.
346
00:17:35,764 --> 00:17:36,854
Hey.
347
00:17:43,313 --> 00:17:45,193
- How are things with Freddy?
- Oh!
348
00:17:46,692 --> 00:17:48,152
Right, still no sex.
349
00:17:50,153 --> 00:17:54,030
He says that he has been
emotionally scarred by the birth.
350
00:17:54,032 --> 00:17:56,616
- Wow. Right.
- Mm.
351
00:17:56,618 --> 00:17:59,578
Okay, well, that's quite
an annoying thing to say.
352
00:17:59,580 --> 00:18:02,664
Uh, because you were
actually scarred by the birth.
353
00:18:02,666 --> 00:18:05,666
- Yeah, he can be quite an annoying person.
- Mm-hmm.
354
00:18:07,087 --> 00:18:09,297
No, it's fine. It's
just a difficult time.
355
00:18:10,340 --> 00:18:11,550
It'll pass.
356
00:18:14,428 --> 00:18:15,802
Oh!
357
00:18:15,804 --> 00:18:17,974
- Oh, God. They are lovely.
- Oh!
358
00:18:24,188 --> 00:18:26,605
Let's go out. I'll buy you dinner.
359
00:18:26,607 --> 00:18:28,977
Yeah? I mean, I think
you sort of have to now.
360
00:18:38,035 --> 00:18:40,035
I booked us tickets to a lecture.
361
00:18:41,955 --> 00:18:44,075
- On purpose?
- Yes, on purpose.
362
00:18:46,376 --> 00:18:49,711
It's more of a talk on child psychology.
363
00:18:49,713 --> 00:18:52,214
- Luke and Kwame go to them.
- All right, yeah.
364
00:18:52,216 --> 00:18:54,132
Jase, this is just
something that we do now.
365
00:18:54,134 --> 00:18:55,224
Okay.
366
00:18:56,512 --> 00:18:58,470
Also, we should start watching the news.
367
00:18:58,472 --> 00:19:00,430
- I already watch the news.
- Oh, do ya?
368
00:19:00,432 --> 00:19:02,607
Yes, I do. Sometimes it's
nice to see someone else
369
00:19:02,609 --> 00:19:04,006
having a worse day than you.
370
00:19:08,232 --> 00:19:09,606
What you doing?
371
00:19:09,608 --> 00:19:10,898
- Lesson plan.
- Mm.
372
00:19:12,736 --> 00:19:15,278
- You got nice writing.
- Why, thank you.
373
00:19:15,280 --> 00:19:18,156
It's nice how your generation
values good penmanship.
374
00:19:23,497 --> 00:19:26,665
Oi! Get off me.
375
00:19:26,667 --> 00:19:29,497
Oi! Get... J, get off me.
376
00:19:33,924 --> 00:19:36,424
It's a queue. You bought us
tickets to a queue.
377
00:19:36,426 --> 00:19:37,506
Stop it.
378
00:19:39,972 --> 00:19:43,723
Twenty pounds? For a book
we're not even gonna read?
379
00:19:43,725 --> 00:19:46,268
You have to buy the book.
It's rude otherwise.
380
00:19:46,270 --> 00:19:48,562
- How long is it?
- It's about, I don't know, 400 pages.
381
00:19:48,564 --> 00:19:50,824
- No, I mean the lecture.
- It's one hour.
382
00:19:52,067 --> 00:19:54,234
- Then another hour.
- Mate.
383
00:19:54,236 --> 00:19:56,526
It's just 20 minutes after that.
384
00:19:58,323 --> 00:19:59,623
What's it even about?
385
00:20:00,659 --> 00:20:03,451
"Sub... Subjectivity speak..." How
am I gonna understand the lecture
386
00:20:03,453 --> 00:20:05,579
if I can't understand
the title of his book?
387
00:20:05,581 --> 00:20:06,872
Twenty pound... All right, mate.
388
00:20:06,874 --> 00:20:07,884
Hiya.
389
00:20:08,959 --> 00:20:11,668
Could you put, um, uh,
"To Nikki and Jason.
390
00:20:11,670 --> 00:20:15,130
Thank you for coming.
Always keep learning.
391
00:20:17,176 --> 00:20:19,596
And good luck with the adoption"?
392
00:20:27,352 --> 00:20:28,352
Sorry.
393
00:20:34,532 --> 00:20:36,013
Oh, that was weird.
394
00:20:36,015 --> 00:20:38,475
Shut up. I get nervous
around clever people.
395
00:20:48,373 --> 00:20:49,497
Mm.
396
00:20:49,499 --> 00:20:51,750
- Got all the gear, haven't you?
- Yeah.
397
00:20:51,752 --> 00:20:55,168
- Three different color highlighters?
- Yeah, 'cause we might need them.
398
00:20:55,170 --> 00:20:56,860
- Got your compass in there?
- No.
399
00:20:56,862 --> 00:20:59,135
- Set square?
- It's not that kind of lecture.
400
00:20:59,137 --> 00:21:01,097
- Protractor?
- Shut up.
401
00:21:02,387 --> 00:21:04,930
Welcome, and thank
you so much for coming.
402
00:21:04,932 --> 00:21:08,392
Okay, so, uh, let's slay some dragons.
403
00:21:09,311 --> 00:21:11,311
What I propose is a link
404
00:21:11,313 --> 00:21:17,783
between Winnicott's transitional
object and Lacan's objet petit a...
405
00:21:18,779 --> 00:21:21,184
viewed in the context of
the child's development
406
00:21:21,186 --> 00:21:23,013
of desire and subjectivity.
407
00:21:23,951 --> 00:21:27,786
- And so, let Winnicott be our guide.
- "Allcock".
408
00:21:27,788 --> 00:21:31,706
On this, I can really
recommend his whole oeuvre.
409
00:21:31,708 --> 00:21:33,542
In fact, I would recommend everyone...
410
00:21:33,544 --> 00:21:34,866
- What's an oeuvre?
- Don't embarrass me.
411
00:21:34,868 --> 00:21:36,337
... in this room to go right back to his
412
00:21:36,339 --> 00:21:38,338
clinical notes on child disorder...
413
00:21:38,340 --> 00:21:45,136
So, we've understood self
as subject, self as object
414
00:21:45,138 --> 00:21:48,018
and the self with object.
415
00:21:49,560 --> 00:21:51,434
Okay, I think we'll
take a short break here.
416
00:21:51,436 --> 00:21:53,603
Is everyone happy if I
lose this from the screen?
417
00:21:53,605 --> 00:21:55,645
Oh, no, no. Hang on. Hang on.
418
00:22:00,404 --> 00:22:01,414
Great.
419
00:22:02,239 --> 00:22:06,533
When we come back, we'll be
moving on to self as other.
420
00:22:06,535 --> 00:22:08,994
Ooh! There be monsters.
421
00:22:11,957 --> 00:22:14,207
Is that it? All right, thank
God for that. Come on, let's go.
422
00:22:14,209 --> 00:22:15,834
No, I'm enjoying it. I'm learning a lot.
423
00:22:15,836 --> 00:22:17,669
You don't understand
this any more than I do.
424
00:22:17,671 --> 00:22:18,753
Yes, I do.
425
00:22:18,755 --> 00:22:20,042
Says the woman who had to pause
426
00:22:20,044 --> 00:22:21,798
Avengers: Infinity War
every five minutes.
427
00:22:21,800 --> 00:22:24,926
- Come on.
- At least I'm trying.
428
00:22:24,928 --> 00:22:27,598
What's the matter?
429
00:22:29,335 --> 00:22:31,474
- What's the matter?
- You're not taking it seriously.
430
00:22:31,476 --> 00:22:32,726
'Cause this isn't us.
431
00:22:32,728 --> 00:22:33,767
We hate stuff like this.
432
00:22:33,769 --> 00:22:35,896
We make fun out of people
who come to stuff like this.
433
00:22:35,898 --> 00:22:37,898
Well, maybe I'm tired
of being that person.
434
00:22:43,280 --> 00:22:44,530
Oi!
435
00:22:45,324 --> 00:22:47,115
Nikki.
436
00:22:47,117 --> 00:22:51,327
- Nikki. Hey. What's going on?
- No, I don't want to talk about it.
437
00:22:52,206 --> 00:22:53,206
Okay.
438
00:22:55,083 --> 00:22:58,376
I want to have something to
say when I talk to these people.
439
00:22:58,378 --> 00:23:00,921
- What people?
- You know, the people.
440
00:23:00,923 --> 00:23:03,465
The people, Jason. The people
that are gonna be judging us
441
00:23:03,467 --> 00:23:05,383
and taking notes on
everything we say from now on.
442
00:23:05,385 --> 00:23:06,481
You've met one bloke
443
00:23:06,483 --> 00:23:08,563
who's read a book on American
politics and you flip out.
444
00:23:08,565 --> 00:23:11,556
- Yeah, because I'm sick of feeling stupid!
- Nikki, you are not...
445
00:23:11,558 --> 00:23:14,893
Sorry, but I am. I'm sick of panicking
in every conversation I have
446
00:23:14,895 --> 00:23:16,978
just in case I use a
word in the wrong way,
447
00:23:16,980 --> 00:23:19,356
or in case someone asks me
where I went to university.
448
00:23:19,358 --> 00:23:21,778
- Come on. None of that stuff matters.
- It matters to me!
449
00:23:26,490 --> 00:23:30,909
These people, Jason, they
always see through me,
450
00:23:30,911 --> 00:23:32,791
and so will the social workers.
451
00:23:34,289 --> 00:23:35,709
Well, you know what?
452
00:23:36,792 --> 00:23:39,342
Screw 'em, hey? Screw 'em.
453
00:23:40,295 --> 00:23:42,295
They're no better than us.
454
00:23:42,297 --> 00:23:45,924
We're good people. We love
each other. We got good jobs.
455
00:23:45,926 --> 00:23:48,176
Yeah, right.
456
00:23:48,929 --> 00:23:50,791
There is a sign near my desk
457
00:23:50,793 --> 00:23:54,641
reminding me to say my name
when I answer the phone.
458
00:23:54,643 --> 00:23:57,769
We've got jobs that people get
stuck in, not jobs people choose.
459
00:23:57,771 --> 00:24:00,397
Look, I might not have a fancy
title and earn lots of money,
460
00:24:00,399 --> 00:24:02,029
but it's a good job, all right?
461
00:24:03,318 --> 00:24:05,554
And I work hard. I work really hard.
462
00:24:05,556 --> 00:24:07,092
So, can we... can we... Look...
463
00:24:08,574 --> 00:24:11,924
Can we just go home? 'Cause, actually,
464
00:24:11,926 --> 00:24:14,244
I'd love to just watch Avengers now.
465
00:24:14,246 --> 00:24:15,246
No.
466
00:24:16,081 --> 00:24:18,373
If you wanna go, go.
467
00:24:18,375 --> 00:24:20,167
But I'm gonna take this seriously.
468
00:24:20,169 --> 00:24:23,839
I am 33 and I want to take
something in my life seriously.
469
00:24:26,008 --> 00:24:28,675
And maybe if we'd taken
ourselves seriously earlier,
470
00:24:28,677 --> 00:24:32,947
we wouldn't both be stuck in jobs
that pay nothing and are really hard.
471
00:24:32,949 --> 00:24:33,949
Sorry.
472
00:25:16,225 --> 00:25:18,135
- Excuse me.
- Yeah, of course. Sorry, mate.
473
00:25:35,118 --> 00:25:37,788
- Cheers. Thank you.
- There you go. Enjoy your meal.
474
00:25:53,136 --> 00:25:55,426
Do you know that Steve Jobs
never went to university?
475
00:25:57,266 --> 00:25:58,516
Nor did Oprah Winfrey.
476
00:26:01,395 --> 00:26:04,565
Or, uh, Larry Ellison.
477
00:26:05,440 --> 00:26:08,280
- Who's Larry Ellison?
- No idea. But he never went to university.
478
00:26:12,281 --> 00:26:14,621
Is this supposed to be an apology?
479
00:26:15,534 --> 00:26:17,310
If you wanna go to more talks and stuff,
480
00:26:17,312 --> 00:26:18,648
then we can do that, all right?
481
00:26:19,621 --> 00:26:22,711
- It's fine. It doesn't matter.
- No, no, really. I was actually...
482
00:26:23,542 --> 00:26:25,856
I was quite getting
into it near the end.
483
00:26:25,858 --> 00:26:29,004
There were some pretty
interesting points.
484
00:26:29,006 --> 00:26:30,130
- Jason.
- Yeah.
485
00:26:30,132 --> 00:26:31,631
This isn't just about us anymore.
486
00:26:31,633 --> 00:26:33,550
We need to convince other
people that we're great.
487
00:26:33,552 --> 00:26:36,052
I know, Nikki, but the people
that we need to convince
488
00:26:36,054 --> 00:26:39,431
aren't the social workers and the
adoption panels or any of that.
489
00:26:39,433 --> 00:26:40,643
It's the kids.
490
00:26:41,768 --> 00:26:44,186
The kids are the ones
that have gotta love us.
491
00:26:44,188 --> 00:26:47,439
And you know who loves rubbish films
492
00:26:47,441 --> 00:26:50,192
and eating burgers and
hates learning stuff?
493
00:26:50,194 --> 00:26:51,204
Kids.
494
00:26:52,654 --> 00:26:54,029
We're gonna be their favorites.
495
00:26:54,031 --> 00:26:55,405
They're all gonna wanna
come home with us.
496
00:26:55,407 --> 00:26:58,987
We're gonna have to back the car
up and just start piling 'em in.
497
00:27:04,625 --> 00:27:06,875
You don't have to say all this.
498
00:27:06,877 --> 00:27:08,752
Who are they gonna prefer? Hmm?
499
00:27:08,754 --> 00:27:12,292
People that make them go to museums
500
00:27:12,294 --> 00:27:16,092
and art galleries,
or people that do this?
501
00:27:18,096 --> 00:27:19,096
See?
502
00:27:20,265 --> 00:27:22,933
- You got the mind of a child.
- Hmm.
503
00:27:22,935 --> 00:27:24,385
They're gonna love you.
504
00:27:26,188 --> 00:27:27,398
And I love you.
505
00:27:28,899 --> 00:27:30,109
I love you.
506
00:27:32,402 --> 00:27:34,242
You're so ridiculous.
507
00:27:37,407 --> 00:27:39,407
It's all right. They'll...
They'll oeuvre it up later.
508
00:27:39,409 --> 00:27:43,329
See. Look, she loves it.
509
00:27:45,249 --> 00:27:46,749
Have I got something on my lip?
510
00:27:48,085 --> 00:27:49,415
You're so daft.
511
00:28:05,435 --> 00:28:06,726
What do you guys do?
512
00:28:06,728 --> 00:28:11,478
Well, it's taken a lot.
Started training and...
513
00:28:14,778 --> 00:28:16,862
- This one's ready.
- Okay.
514
00:28:16,864 --> 00:28:19,874
And then the two salads and...
515
00:28:23,036 --> 00:28:25,787
All right, gents. In the back!
516
00:28:25,789 --> 00:28:26,959
Sofia.
39094
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