All language subtitles for The Rockford Files S05e01 Heartaches Of A Fool_prob3

I think somebody ought to wave
you off the track before you hit the wall.

But my dad's still where
he was three minutes ago,

and your sausages are
still being made in Mexico.

You got Charlie Strayhorn and
you brought him here to this room.

He wasn't doing too much,
so I had to twist his arm a little.

Stop it, Charlie!

He's Chinese.

Oh, I love it. I just love it.

Yahoo!

ROCKFORD ON ANSWERING
MACHINE: This is Jim Rockford.

At the tone, leave your
name and message.

I'll get back to you.

Say, I'm the one who
hit your car at Ford City.

I got no insurance, I'm broke, but I
really wanted you to know how sorry I am.

If it makes you feel
any better, I hurt my arm.

Ladies and gentlemen,

The Global Pavilion is proud
to present its favorite star,

Charlie Strayhorn.

Well, a long time forgotten

Are dreams that
just fell by the way

And the good life he promised
ain't what she's living today

But she never complains
of the bad times

Or the bad things
he's done, Lord

She just talks about the good times
they've had and all the good times to come

She's a good-hearted woman
in love with a good-timing man

And she loves him in spite of
his ways that she don't understand

Through teardrops and laughter

They're gonna pass through
this world hand in hand, Lord

This good-hearted woman
in love with a good-timing man

He likes the nightlife, the bright
lights and his good-timing friends

And when the party's all over,
she'll welcome him back home again

Lord knows she
don't understand him

But she does the
best that she can

This good-hearted woman
in love with a good-timing man

She's a good-hearted woman
in love with a good-timing man

And she loves him in spite of
his ways that she don't understand

Through teardrops and laughter

They're gonna pass through
this world hand in hand, Lord

This good-hearted woman
in love with a good-timing man

You didn't get a plate on
either of the vehicles, sir?

Well, how was I going
to get a plate, officer?

I was too busy with my binders, trying
to keep the back end from passing me.

Mmm-hmm. I assume you're
qualified for eighteen-wheelers.

License's still
current and all that?

Well, it sure is.

Is that it in your pants
pocket, Mr. Rockford?

Yeah, right there.

Would you take it
out for me, please?

Sixty-eight?

Little old for the big
rigs, aren't you, sir?

Hey, Dad, you okay? Now, wait.

Just a minute, just a minute.

What does that mean? Excuse me.

Are you related to Mr. Rockford?

All my life. He's my dad.

Well, we're still
investigating this, sir.

Your log says you were pulling hot dogs
for a combined weight of 23,000 pounds.

We have a county white hat
going out there in the morning

to check everything out, but meanwhile,
I think I'll just hang onto this.

I'll clip it right here to my board
so you'll know right where it is, sir.

Are you lifting my license?

Well, sir, in a large accident like
this, it's customary to have a review.

I wouldn't worry about it.
I'm glad you're feeling better.

Sonny. It's okay, Dad.

No, no, he's got my license
there. Dad, it's okay. Just a minute.

Put out a code seven at Sis and AI's.
- Officer?

I haven't eaten yet.

Would you excuse
me just a minute?

You're lucky he wasn't
hurt a lot worse than he was.

They're gonna keep him here
for a while for evaluation, I guess.

Yeah, well, it's
about his license.

Let me interrupt you
right there, Mr. Rockford.

Now, I was trying to be
nice in there, but, come on.

Sixty-eight, driving an
eighteen-wheeler way too fast...

He left enough rubber out there
to get a reclamation contract.

I'm not the last
word on these things,

but my guess is the DMV is
gonna ice your dad's ticket.

May I?

If my father says there
were two blue sedans,

there were two blue sedans.

That's an old story, sir.

Every time one of these guys
cartwheels one of those monsters,

it's always another car coming
down the wrong side of the road

or some crazy thing like that.

Fact is, I think your dad
maybe was sleeping up there,

drove off the road
and had himself

one of the biggest
weenie roasts in history.

I hope he's feeling
better. Good night.

Dr. Philips, go to the emergency
entrance. Dr. Judd Philips.

Well?

Well...

Listen... I... You know, I
was worried about you.

I really was. I talked to the nurse,
she said you're gonna be okay.

Forty-five years I been
pushing and trucking.

They're gonna pull my ticket.

No they're not. Not really.

It wasn't even my truck.

What am I gonna
tell Roland Eddy?

Well, I'll tell him for
you, Dad. It's okay.

I'm telling you
something, sonny,

they pull my ticket,

it ain't never gonna
be the same for me.

You only use it now and then, and then
it's only when you're backing up a friend.

I mean, what's the difference?

That ain't the point.

It's just knowing I got that
ticket here in my wallet that...

It gives me a reason for being.

Now, you can
understand that, can't you?

Yeah, I can understand it, Dad.

Them chappies was already
here. Signed off the report.

Seeing as how it was
my truck he totaled.

Yeah, well, my dad really feels
terrible about the accident, Mr. Eddy.

He said you'd been sick.

That's why he
was driving for you.

Yeah, I been feeling
a little mussed.

Just can't seem to shake it.

He seems to think it was
an attempted hijacking.

Look, you tell him I ain't
squawking about the truck.

Just forget about the truck.

The less said
about that the better.

Did you read the police report?

Yeah.

Well, if my dad said he
was forced off the road,

then he was forced off the road.

He wants me to look
into it. Try to prove it.

Come on. He what?

You heard me.

You his son, huh? Yeah.

Let me see
something proving that.

What the hell's the
matter with old Joe?

Didn't he tell you about Slim and the
meeting at the Fifty-One Diner near Diego?

The what?

Didn't he tell you about ducking
them truck scales and not using

Highway I-Five?

What are you talking about?

Smuggle, man. It was a smuggle.

Them links was
made down in Mexico.

We been running them up
here for about two weeks now.

Six trucks. I made six trips
myself. Usually to San Diego.

Wait a minute.

Are you trying to tell me that

you told my father he was
smuggling and he agreed to it?

I don't believe that.

Well, maybe I didn't use the word
"smuggling," but come on, man,

I told him to take the truck
down to San Diego, give it to Slim,

Slim would load it
and give it back to him.

I told him to stay away
from the truck scales

and not get near no
four-lane highways.

Now was he born in church?
Don't he know what that means?

Slim who?

Don't know his
last name, just Slim.

Then there were two
sedans. Who was in them?

How do I know?

Could be some overeager food and
drug feds, maybe some freelancers.

It might be some enemies
of the guys who set this up.

I tell you one thing, I'm glad
they wrecked my truck, though.

I'm damn glad of that

'cause I'm going to
collect on the insurance.

I'm going to move
up to Washington

'cause L.A. ain't
my town no more.

Let me ask you something.

When you deliver,
where do you take them?

They usually give me a
spot. Supermarket parking lot.

I get out, leave the
keys on the front tire,

come back in the
morning, box is empty.

You probably forgot to
mention that to Rocky, too, huh?

Look, the only reason
I'm telling you this

is so you keep that
old man of yours quiet.

Now if he stays quiet, all them
buzzards is gonna fly right on past.

But if he opens up to the
cops or anybody like that,

then they're gonna pack him
up and plant him in the garden.

Well, you haven't
said who "they" were.

I don't know who they are.

I just answer the telephone.

They send my money in the
mail. It's green and it's cash.

Now, the only thing I
know, Mr. Rockford,

is what I read on them packages.

You want to see it?

That's it.

I don't believe it.

Of course, all this will be brought
up before the union management.

You'll have a right to be
present and give your side of it.

But in the meantime, all of your
pension and medical benefits

will be withheld
pending the hearing.

You, of course, are
suspended temporarily

according to all the provisions and
stipulations of Working Rule Eight.

Working Rule Eight?

I never... I'm sorry.

Dr. Tony Bates
wanted in CCU, stat.

Dr. Bates, CCU, stat.

Who were those guys?

They're from the union.

Oh, hey, I wanted to tell you,
you shouldn't file for your medical.

I got a pretty good idea that the truck
you were driving was not a union run.

Forty years I been in that
union and they just threw me out.

No, no, it's got to
be another number.

It's in Cripple Creek, Arkansas.

That's the same
number I have, operator.

I've been calling
that for two hours.

All I get is a recording. They
keep giving me the same recipe.

I want the packaging plant
or the executive offices.

Nurse Conti, report to x-ray.

Thanks. Thanks anyway. Yeah.

Oh, hey, Dad, do you
know what time it is, huh?

Time for the Hundred
Thousand Dollar Question.

Hey, maybe that plumber from
Tarzana made it to the next plateau, huh?

Now, come on. Let's see how
many of the answers you know.

States of the Union.

You ought to know all of them, you've
been through enough of them on long hauls.

Turn it down, sonny.

Only if you talk to me. I'm
getting tired of the monologue.

You know, I'm running
out of fresh material. Okay?

Okay.

Come on, Dad, I'm
going to find that plant

and I'm gonna make that sausage
company pay for the medical,

or I'm gonna throw
them to the union.

Thanks, sonny.

Look, if I can find out where
the sausages are made,

maybe I can figure out who
the guys in the cars were.

If I can prove that they
were across the road,

I can square you with the DMV
and get your ticket right back.

It don't do no good to have your ticket
unless you can drive for the union, sonny.

I know that, but
what about the...

I'll be right back.

You know what them union
guys is saying about me?

They said I wasn't familiar
with Working Rule Eight.

Oh, dear.

'56... You remember '56?

Yeah, I remember.
I was on the...

I remember. I was on
the strike committee then.

Right.

Me and 15 other guys, we
helped write Working Rule Eight.

I still remember.

"If any member will be
participating in or attempting to

"stage any long or short
hauls in any city, state..."

Wait... Hold it, Dad.
Hang on just a minute.

Hickory-smoked sausages put up in
special sheds in Cripple Creek, Arkansas,

and they're smoked
to just the right flavor.

Now when I get up in the
morning, I hear old Uncle Willie's

skillet crackling in there, I know
he's cooking up some of this good

Cripple Creek Country
sausage or bacon.

Boy, it gets my mouth to
watering and starts my day off right.

Now remember, when you're in
the market for Charlie Strayhorn's

Cripple Creek Country
Sausage or breakfast meat,

then you're going to rustle up your
own good old country morning breakfast.

Now, so far he's the only guy in
this whole deal that I'm sure exists.

I'm gonna find him.

I wouldn't put 20
cents on Uncle Willie.

That guy could be anyplace.

Oh, most of these guys park their
chuck wagons in Bel Air, Rocky.

I'll find him.

If he's not in town, I'll hunt
him down wherever he is.

Thanks, sonny.
Hey, don't you worry.

I'm going to get some action
'cause I happen to be getting mad.

We still have unrealized
income of two and a half million

which is currently
balancing on the tip of a pin.

If the Fed disallows the
terms of that Amco record deal

and say we can't income average

and dump that dough out
into the next 10-year period,

Chuck's gonna have to take it
all as straight income this year.

And, fellas, we're gonna be standing
out on the salt flats with a tin cup.

And I haven't even touched
on tax penalty interest rates

and a whole symphony
of related problems.

Well, fellas, it looks like we can't
stand to see one more penny income.

And, Carrie, you and Charlie
should inventory that house

this afternoon as
soon as possible.

Okay, Chas? Hmm?

How about it, buddy? You
could do it this afternoon.

It's got to be accomplished
before she files for divorce

'cause you're gonna
be on the road and then

you're going back
to Germany and...

Norman, can we get these fellas to
stop hammering and sawing around here?

Ain't gonna need this
wing anymore anyway.

Look, buddy, I know it's a
drag, but you know, let's face it.

They've already knocked the wall
down on the east wing for the addition

and I think it's safe to say we're
gonna put this place on the market.

Let's finish it.

It'll bring in a good price and
we're gonna need that cash on hand.

Yeah, I guess that's about
what this place adds up to,

cash on hand.

Well, then, you want
to get started, hmm?

Hey, what about the album?
I talked to Dave over at Amco

and he says they wanna
postpone till May. Is that right?

That's my department, Chucker.

We're holding it back because

A, we're saturated 'cause Charlie
Strayhorn Live is still selling like crazy.

And B, the company wants to save
the Red River album for the next quarter.

And frankly, with what Hill just
told us about income management,

it's probably just as well.

Well, it ain't all
right with me.

All I want to do is record
them songs and sing for folks.

Now, Hill here says I'm
making too much money.

I can't pay my taxes
because of this divorce.

I can't get these
workmen out of here,

I got to listen to hammers and
saws and road graders all day long.

I ain't wrote a
song in two weeks.

Now they want to
postpone Red River.

The only thing that's worked
out right in the last six months

is the damn sausages.

Charlie, we're just a little
tax rich and cash poor,

which happens when
somebody gets too hot too fast.

Norm hasn't had a chance
to work out a tax shelter,

so we're gonna get rained on a
little. But we're gonna come out of it.

Charlie. Yeah, Shorty.

Fella at the door wants to
see you. Name's Rockford.

I ain't got time
right now, Shorty.

Find out what he wants and turn him
onto the right guy to handle it, will you?

He wants to talk to you about the
sausages. Shall I put him on to Clement?

Wait a minute.
About the sausages?

Yeah.

Well, okay. Wait a minute.

I tell you, you all keep battling this
steer, I'll find out what this guy wants.

Thank you, Shorty.

Doesn't seem like we're
leaving him much, does it?

You're the one who hired Laurence of
Beverly Hills to run a pole through him.

You want to tell that
guy to back down?

You won't get an
argument from us, dear.

Howdy.

I'm Charlie Strayhorn.
You wanted to see me?

I got a complaint
about your sausages.

I don't get many.

Get ready for a lulu.

Okay, shoot.

How come your sausages, which are supposed
to be made in Cripple Creek, Arkansas,

are actually being made
in Sonoma, Mexico?

And how come
the non-union trucks

that are smuggling them up here
are being wrecked and burned?

Are you some kind
of escapee, mister?

My father agreed to drive one of your
truckloads of sausages up from San Diego.

The plant that made
them was in Mexico.

He ended up wrecking his
truck, ended up in a hospital,

losing his license,
his medical plan...

Them sausages is made
in Cripple Creek, Arkansas.

Now, it's a little
town in the...

I know where it is, do you?

Have you ever been there?

Well, no, I haven't been there. I
made the deal before I went to Tokyo.

I've been touring
for six months.

Which means you don't know
anymore about it than I do.

I know them sausages
ain't being made in Mexico.

Come on, man,
they're FDA approved.

They ain't got no import stamps.

Non-union trucks... Why would
my meats be going non-union?

Those trucks have got
to go into supermarkets

and supermarkets ain't gonna
unload no kind of non-union trucks.

I don't know how it's
happening, but it is.

Boy, you say your
daddy told you this?

Yeah. I also got it
from another driver

who's been to the plant in Mexico
once, seen the whole operation.

He's also made six
trips up from San Diego.

I don't believe him either.

Charlie, excuse me.

Norm wants to know if we
can get started on the inventory.

No, I can't do no inventory. I got
trouble with the sausage company.

I got to deal with it myself.

Where are you going?

I just got to get out of here.
These people are eating me up.

I thought we had some sausage
business we were going to take care of.

I don't know what
your game is, mister,

but I got some sharpshooter
coming at me about every 10 seconds,

and I got troubles of my own.

Well, the biggest trouble you got is
standing right here on this sidewalk.

Now, either you listen
to what I'm telling you

or you're going to go
home across your saddle.

Oh, boy, that
does it. I don't...

All righty.

Charlie, what...

Charlie, what are you doing?

Stop it!

Stop it! Carrie,
get away from here!

Stop it, Charlie!

Quit! No!

Look at you, Charlie.

You just had to go and
hit somebody, didn't you?

No, just him.

Hey, Charlie, come on,
we got some work to do.

Oh, damn it!

You wait a minute.

Just wait a minute, Charlie.

We're not through
with our business.

Okay.

Charlie, you tell
me what's going on.

I'll tell you. The cowboy
just started swinging at me.

Boy, I tell you, that felt good.

You got yourself a pretty
good left hand there, partner.

Ah, big deal.

Honey, I want you to meet...
What'd you say your name was?

Jim Rockford.

Well, Jim, I want
you to meet my wife.

Well, she's not my... Well, pretty
soon she's not going to be my wife.

It's nice to meet you.
You'll have to excuse him.

Now, look, this
is all really swell,

but my dad's still where
he was three minutes ago,

and your sausages are still
being made in Mexico, ace.

I tell you one thing, them
guys with their tax losses

and their inventories
are driving me nuts.

I somehow feel that
we've gotten off the subject.

Now, how do I get you
locked in on one beam, huh?

Well, you tell me where I'm
going to go, then I'll take us there.

2365, Amber Lane.

What are you doing?
Where are you taking me?

Gun it!

Hey, that's him. They're
snatching him. That's Roland Eddy.

Go on, Charlie, get in the
truck. Come on, come on.

Come on, start it, Charlie.

Come on.

Son-of-a-gun.

There he is. There he is.
- There he is.

Oh, my gosh. You're gorgeous!

Charlie!

Okay, thank you,
gentlemen, for the report.

We'll file it and let you know.

All right, thank you
very much, officer.

Oh, folks, we just
don't have time.

I've got to be getting along.
Thank you very much for asking.

Just a chorus, Charlie, please.

Thank you, honey.

Please, Charlie.

Oh, honey, just be a
friend just this once, okay?

I love you. Bye-bye.

Bye, Charlie. We love you.

Yeah, it looks like they got
him. Cops were here, anyway.

We should've picked him up
ourselves. Gone with my instincts.

Rolling that rig should've done it,
but nobody knew that Eddy wasn't in it.

We got to find that
factory. Hit them there.

Yeah, okay, Clark,
we'll get on it.

Then they must have
set fire to Roland's truck.

And when I woke up, I was
here, the police was here.

They took away my license,
the union said I'm driving illegal,

and they canceled me out cold.

Well, that's it, Charlie.

He tried to bring your
stuff up from San Diego,

he ends up with a towel wrapped
around his head. It's your move.

Oh, now, sonny, it seems
to me that Mr. Strayhorn,

he's done enough
just coming over here.

I'm telling you, I feel a lot
better just with you in the room.

Don't take the
pressure off, Rocky.

I buy all your cassettes,
you know that?

I play them on the long hauls
when the radio won't come in.

I'm telling you, sonny,

Mr. Strayhorn here, he'd never
do nothing illegal. I can tell.

Yeah, well, somebody is.

All I can tell you,
Mr. Rockford,

is that I'm real sorry about
what's happened to you

and I intend to get
to the bottom of it.

At least that's
something, hey, Rocky?

Now, the first thing I'm gonna
do, I'm gonna call Clement,

get his butt over
here and find out

why my links is coming
up from San Diego.

And second, I'm gonna
come back here in person

and tell you what
happened and why.

Who's Clement?

Clement's the one who got
me in this deal in the first place.

He's in charge of it.

He also has all the answers,
and I'm sure those answers

don't have nothing to do with
no packing plant down in Mexico.

Real nice to meet
you, Mr. Rockford.

I'll be taking care of your
hospital bills either way.

We can handle that.

I said I'm gonna
take care of them.

The man says I need tax
write-offs anyway. Come on.

See you in the
hall, Jim. So long.

By golly, you done it, sonny.

You got Charlie Strayhorn and
you brought him here to this room.

I've never been so excited.

Yeah, the problem
is, I kind of like him.

He's a real one.
I like him, too.

Yeah. I guess he's okay.

He wasn't doing too much,
so I had to twist his arm a little.

I love you, sonny.

Physical therapist,
report to room 420.

I'll see you.

Hey, Charlie. Charlie, thanks a
lot. You really picked up his spirits.

It's a lot more than I could do.

Well, my old man
split when I was 16.

Left me and my kid brother in
Okmulgee, Oklahoma. Yeah.

We stole and slept under
porches. Never did go to school.

I like your daddy.

Seems to me he did a
real good job with you.

He worked, worried about
you when you were sick,

now you're doing
it for him. I like that.

Hey, me and Carrie's
got a boy. Yeah?

Yeah. He lives in Oklahoma City
while we get this thing straightened out.

He's with her parents.

One of my hopes was he'd never
have to sleep under no porch.

The way we got it fixed, I guess
Chet will be sleeping on airplanes.

Ain't that right, honey?

I'm sorry, Carrie.

He's right, you know. But
then, he's Charlie Strayhorn.

Things just got going too fast and
now there's no way to stop them.

Thanks. Bye. Bye.

Can't we just call the rest
of this stuff miscellaneous

and just guess at a figure, huh?

Seems kind of funny, you know.

All this stuff, as you call it.

Some of it ain't got
no price I can think of.

Charlie, what I meant was...

Oh, honey, I know
what you meant.

It's just...

Well, like this Mexican saddle
we got down here on the list,

remember that's the one
we used to put on Dappler?

Huh?

What do you figure
that old saddle's worth?

I broke an arm winning it.

You was judging pies,
thought I was crude.

Called me a rough rider.

I had to give you the
saddle to get a date with you.

What do you figure that old
saddle's worth? Twenty dollars?

What're you trying
to do, Charlie?

Open up old wounds
and get them bleeding?

Ah, it's just all these fellas around
here with scarves and loafers.

How in the hell did they ever get
hitched up on our wagon anyway?

I suppose you want
to figure out the taxes

and book the tours and
make the record deals...

No.

I liked that old
man today. Jim, too.

How come we don't have
no friends like that no more?

Used to be we did.

Where the hell did they all go?

You don't want them,
Charlie. Not really.

You want to prove who you are
and grow all your roots in 18 months.

And that just doesn't
leave any time.

It was nice, you worrying
about Chet this afternoon.

But you can worry all you want.

It's not going to make
your being in Tokyo

any easier for a little
kid to understand.

Okay, let's make that saddle
worth $20. Let's make it worth $20.

There you go, Jake.

Yeah? What'd you say?

I beg your pardon?

What'd you call me?

I didn't call you anything.

I don't take that from anybody.

Come on, pal.

That's the weirdest thing I ever
saw. What'd you call him, Jim?

I didn't call him anything.

Hey, Jake, we don't
need any cops, do we?

No, go on and get out of
here. I'll steer him the other way.

Thanks, Jake.

Them doggies are gone

Hey, Jim. Hey, Jim-boy.

Come out of there. I
know you're in there.

Whoo, Jim-boy.

All right. All right.

Oh, boy, a drunken
cowboy. What a treat.

How you doing, pard?

Hey, Charlie, don't
shout at me, will you?

I ran into a little
trouble earlier.

The inside of my head revolves
when you shout at me, okay?

Did I do that to you?

No. It happened later.

Hey, hey, hey, Rockford.
You know what?

I got the lowdown on how them
links is coming up from San Diego.

Oh, Charlie, Charlie,
would you keep it down?

You know why?

Because Clement said
they were having trouble

getting a direct railroad
from Cripple Creek,

so what they did was
they got three railcars

from the UP Lines
straight into Dallas

and then ran them right on up to San
Diego and trucked them right on up here.

How does that explain the
fact they were non-union trucks?

Oh, Clement says that guy Eddy probably
just didn't register with the union.

It's just one bad apple
in it, that's all, son.

Will you knock it off, Charlie?

Now, I'm not gonna
ask you again, okay?

What are you gonna
do, throw me out? Huh?

Come on. When I drink, I'm tougher
than a boll weevil in a sugar jar. Come on.

Yeah, well, I eat boll
weevils for breakfast.

That is, when I'm not
eating Mexican sausages.

Oh, Jim, they ain't
Mexican sausages.

Come on, man. I came over
here to have a party with you.

Won't you lighten up on me, son?

Oh, why don't you just give
them a call in Cripple Creek?

They answer the
phone with a recording.

I think it's time you went
down there and had a little...

It's there! Why don't
you just take it from...

Yeah, who? Clement?
Oh, sure. Yeah.

He's got more lines than
the telephone company.

Okay. I'll tell you what.

I got an airplane
over at Van Nuys

and since you are so all fired up to
go down to Cripple Creek, let's go.

You're drunk.

That's it, boy. The old Bel Air
cowboy coming at you in a plastic cup.

Come on, Jim. Give them a hoot.

Not with this head.

All right. Not too
bad, huh, partner?

Bought this from Charlie Pride.
Before that, it belonged to Elvis.

Pretty good, though. Got a TV
and a videotape, got a mixing panel

and a bar and a full kitchen. Pretty
good, though, ain't it? What do you think?

I don't think you want
to hear it, Charlie.

I do, too. Come
on, Jim, talk to me.

I think somebody ought to wave
you off the track before you hit the wall.

Yeah?

Well, when you're
right, you're right.

I been thinking about
taking some time off.

Maybe spending it with Chet or
getting Carrie to try to understand some.

I got this German
tour coming up.

Hill says I got to put some
of that dough in a Swiss bank

and I can beat the
Feds out of their share.

In fact, I got to do that, 'cause
Carrie's gonna wipe me out.

She don't want it
that way, but I don't

want it this way. But
we're doing it anyway.

There might be a lyric
in there somewhere.

Maybe I better write a little
music. You gonna be all right here?

Oh, yeah. I'll be fine.

Oh, boy.

Yeah.

I can sure write good up here.

Nobody pulling me
into no limos or meetings

or talking into my ear about schedules
and itineraries, people I got to talk to.

Just them old engines
droning out there.

This bird chasing the
sun, running from it,

don't matter which,
it's all the same.

Don't let me bother you now.

Started out with the dreams

And the plans of a wise man

And ended up with
the heartaches of a fool

As a boy, I would
walk through the valley

And gaze at the world all-around

Made a vow that somehow

I would find fame and fortune

Well, I found it

But look at me now

Boy, it sure takes your
breath away, doesn't it?

Of course, you can look
on the bright side of it.

You got your smoking
shed all set up there.

All you need is the 50,000
square feet of factory.

Knock it off, Rockford.

Well, come on.

Let's go see if we can
find the plant manager.

This can't be the place.

That guy had to
be mistaken in town.

From the looks of it, you ought
to start branching out, Charlie.

"Fillet the sausage and pack
American cheese in the center,

"double over and wrap in
Charlie Strayhorn Hickory Smoked,

"uncooked bacon,
then throw in the skillet

"and cook till brown." Mmm-mmm.

What is this place?

It's a mail drop, Charlie,

and your factory is right where I
said it was. In the middle of Mexico.

Clement slipped you
a rusty musket, partner.

About had enough? Yeah.

Well, shall we take a look
at the smoking shed, Charlie?

He's dead.

Why? Why would
anybody want to kill...

The guy who tried to kick my
head in last night was Chinese,

now this guy.

I wonder how all
that adds up and why.

You got something,
Charlie? What is it?

Clement. What about him?

His name is Clement
Chen. He's Chinese.

Oh, I love it. I just love it.

Well, I'll give you an escort
out to the airfield, Charlie.

Red lights and a siren.

Well, there's no point in that.

I'd hate to scare these cattle
and everything, you know.

Yeah, well, we want to thank
you, Sheriff. Oh, thank you.

When we get back
to L.A., you set

up the meeting with
Chen and I'll handle it.

But once we get
there, it's my party.

Look, Charlie, I
know you're angry.

Hey, babe, why not? Right?

I mean, okay, so I smoked a
fastball past you. Look, hey, come on.

It's a slot machine and
it's just starting to pay off.

This sucker is a gold mine.

If we were producing in the
U.S. with all the union restrictions,

it would cost us
85 cents a unit.

Now, in Mexico, with everything
exactly the same, we get them in L.A.,

F.O.B. my food distributing
company for 13 cents a unit.

Now, you built a
plant down in Mexico.

You get Charlie
to front it for you,

and then you probably
got one FDA inspector

all scared or jammed
up or whatever,

but he's stamping it
down in Mexico for you.

Then you smuggle them up here.

And your distribution is probably
this year's biggest hit musical.

Hey, what's wrong with that?

It's illegal.

What's your story, mister? Did
you just drift down in a white balloon?

So it's illegal. So
who's getting hurt?

Well, let's start with your
man Loo in Cripple Creek.

He's getting bundled off to
Boot Hill in a $20 pine box

and then there's Roland Eddy.

He probably just had
one drink too many

and fell into the
fourth dimension.

I've had a lot of
pressure on me lately.

Everything will work
out fine, Charlie.

You just have to
stick it out for a while.

If you want out later, I'll
take you out at a profit.

And you're wrong
about Mr. Roland Eddy.

He isn't dead.

I'm a businessman,
not a murderer.

You're a real slug, you
know that, Clement? Huh?

Thank you, gentlemen,
that'll be fine.

Business associates?

What are you, Clement?

Chinese Mafia? Isn't
that what they call it?

Mafia?

I'm a member of the Triad. It's a
very old Chinese business affiliation.

Yeah, well, you ought to
talk to the police gang squad.

You know, they call it an
underworld crime syndicate.

Well, I suppose that brings our
business discussion to a close.

Yeah.

Excuse me a minute.
I'll be right back.

Charlie, I wouldn't.

I tried it once, my
head's still throbbing.

Do you think the word got out that
they're serving Mexican egg rolls?

Well, something sure
cleared it out in a hurry.

Telephone, Mr. Strayhorn.

Yeah?

Charlie, I'm calling
you from my car.

Listen, buddy, you might
want to get out of there yourself.

Yeah? Why?

There's some men
about to hit the place.

They might be a
little out of sorts.

Thanks a lot, Clement.
We're on our way out now.

Charlie, I got an idea.

He said something about
a food distribution company.

Go get the pickup, all right?

What's wrong? Why
are we stopping?

Oh, no, Davey.

Not you. I got to.

No other choice.

Pick up the phone
and dial 555-6787.

Then hand it back.

I'll kill you for this.

They got my sister
and mother, Clement.

I got to do what
they say. Now dial.

How do you like that?

Your Cripple Creek Sausages are being
distributed by a Chinese noodle company.

That ought to knock the old down-home
country image right in the head.

Uh-huh.

Somebody in there has to
know where that factory is.

I think we ought to go in there and
bust some buns and find out where.

Let's call the police
and let them do it.

Get down!

Okay, you got a
clean gripe coming,

I'll copy to that, but we
couldn't use union trucks.

We would've been in trouble
all the way up and down the line.

Get serious, man.
We're smugglers.

I told you on the phone
how it was two months ago.

You cut me in or we
put you out of business.

I offered a fair deal.
So what do you do, huh?

You get a couple of riceballs to
throw a bomb in my front window.

You think I'm gonna sit around and
wait for you to ice me and my family?

They did that without asking.

They were just a
couple of punks.

Oh, shut up.

So what are you going to do now?

I'm gonna kill you.
That's what I'm gonna do.

You're gonna kill me over
that? Just because of that?

I'm gonna kill you
because I know you, mister.

If I let you go, you'd kill me.

It's got nothing to do with
sausages or the ITTW.

It has to do with who ends
up alive and who ends up dead.

Okay, Mike, go in there
and collect Roland Eddy.

Take Mel with you
and make it fast.

I don't like it.

Charlie.

Charlie.

I bought these for hunting.
Hey, Charlie, come on.

You can't be serious.

I tell you something, I ain't felt
better about nothing in five years.

Just cool it. Hold it a minute.

All right. Now, I'm against it,

but you get in the truck bed.

I'm gonna pull up and
block the driveway.

Okay.

Charlie, hold it.

Yahoo!

Man, I can't believe it.

Here we are, actually
at Charlie's house.

You don't suppose we should
have phoned him first or something?

Oh, I guess, maybe, but he's
not all that formal a guy, Rocky.

He yells things like "yahoo."

Wait till I tell him I got
my driver's license back.

I'll wait. And wait
till I tell him the union

reinstated me 'cause they
found out the real crook

was the president of
the union and not me.

Wait till I tell him
that. I'll wait, Dad.

Well, hey, yahoo!

Hello there. Anybody home?

Hi.

Oh, we're the Rockford family

and we come calling
on Mr. Strayhorn.

Well, he ain't
here. Where is he?

Well, after he got
back from Sonoma

and finished closing out that sausage
business, he sort of lost interest.

So I suggested he go up to
the ranch and do a little fishing.

He called me yesterday,
said he was leaving.

Didn't know when
he'd be back. If ever.

I baked this here cake for him and I
got the best news I wanted to tell him.

You're Joseph, ain't you?

Yeah. Yeah. Yes, sir.

Well, I got something
for you, too.

What do you expect he's
got for us? I don't know.

What's that for?

That's the rig we used
to use on old Dappler.

That's the horse that Charlie
rodeod on, and this is for you, too.

"Charlie Strayhorn,
Heartaches of a Fool.

"For Rocky who
helped set me free."

He... He got my name
right smack on that record.

"Most of what I have
ain't worth giving,

"but there was this $20 saddle.

"Thanks, Jim. Love, Charlie."

Right on the record,
eh? Mmm-hmm.

All right!

Started out with the dreams

And the plans of a wise man

And ended up with
the heartaches of a fool

As a boy, I would
walk through the valley

And gaze at the world all-around

Made a vow that somehow

I would find fame and fortune

Well, I found it

But look at me now

I had a sweetheart who
would love me forever

Didn't need her

I would reign all alone

Now look at me I'm the king

Of a cold lonely castle

The queen of my heart is gone

So gather round me,
you fools, for a dollar

Listen to me, a
lesson you'll learn

Well, there's happiness and love

Sent from heaven above

And the fires of
ambition will burn

Started out with the dreams

And the plans of a wise man

And ended up with
the heartaches of a fool