All language subtitles for The Sarah Jane Adventures (2007) - S03E09 - Mona Lisas Revenge (1) (1080p WEB-DL x265 Panda)_track3_[eng]

CLYDE: 13 Bannerman Road is
where Sarah Jane Smith lives

and it's home to things
way beyond your imagination.

There's an extra-terrestrial
super computer in the wall,

a genetically engineered
boy genius in the attic,

a schoolgirl investigator
across the road,

and a whole universe
of adventure right here
on the doorstep.

-Ready?
-Always.

I don't know how you do that.

You've either got it,
or you haven't Lukey-boy.

You see,
art isn't something
you can learn.

Surely it's a matter
of bio-mechanical transference
of what the eye sees to paper?

In the end,
it all comes down to geometry.

You see,
there's your problem, Luke.

You work up here,
you're all science and logic

and spocky stuff
like that,

but you can't break art
down into maths.

Everything comes
down to maths.

See, not art.
Art is in the soul.

You don't think it.

-You feel it.
-(DOOR OPENS)

CHANDRA: Morning 11T.

Someone's in trouble.
That's dad's serious face.

Yeah, like he's got
any other sort.

CHANDRA: All right,
you lot, settle down.

If I may, Mrs Taylor?

I have an important
announcement to make.

-Told you.
-Concerning you,
Clyde Langer.

Me? Oh, what have
I done now?

Wait, oh, no! Wait.
Don't tell me.

I turned up.

All I have to do to get
some teacher's back up.

You aren't in trouble, Clyde.
For once, quite the opposite.

I've just had an e-mail,
from a Mr Harding.

-Curator of the
International Gallery.
-Who?

At last!

Indeed, Mr Harding.

I never thought I would
see the day when
she came into my care.

So, so beautiful.

No one else could have
achieved this.

The years
of dedicated planning.

No one would
have been man enough.

We got there in the end,
Miss Trupp.

After all our tribulations.

Yours. I only assisted.

True, true. You did.

And here she is.

The Mona Lisa!

Tomorrow morning,
this entire class
will be the first members

of the public to see...

The Mona Lisa here in the UK.

And all thanks to Clyde.
You won first prize!

(ALL CHEERING)

You won!

Wait, wait, wait, wait,
as much as I appreciate
the adulation

and missing
double maths tomorrow,
there's been a mistake.

I never put my work
into any competition.

Someone did.

Well, I wonder who?

They were looking
for the country's most
promising young artist.

-And you really
are good, Clyde.
-Brilliant.

I knew you would never
put yourself forward.

Well, it's not good
for the image, is it?
Some nerdy competition.

I've gotta text mum.

How many times?

No mobiles in the classroom.

Or at the gallery tomorrow.

-(ALL GROANING)
-Their rules, not mine.

You're not annoyed
with me, are you?

Are you serious?
It's the Mona Lisa!

We should press on.

Yes.

Oh, tomorrow will be
such a day for me!

(LAUGHING MENACINGLY)

Mum?

You won't believe
what's happened.

-Mum?
-SARAH JANE: I'm in your room.

(SIGHS)

Look at
the state of this place.

Yeah, I know, but...

I thought
I told you to tidy it.

-I will. Just listen.
-When?

Oh, I hate to think
how long all these cups
have been here.

Oh.

Okay.

No, it isn't.

And you can forget
any other plans
you had for this evening

because you're
blitzing this place.

Don't think
K9's gonna zap
all this rubbish.

He's out of bounds
till it's done.

I am so disappointed in you.

I don't know
what you want from me.

You say you are trying
to give me a normal life,

but when I act
like a real teenager

you want me
to be perfect again.

The way the Bane made me.

-I'm sorry you feel like that.
-So am I.

Hand in your mobile phones
at reception and no running.

No running!

We're here as honoured guests,
not like some hormonal SAS.

Oh, what's the use?

Ah freebies!

No, I'll pass, thanks.

Uh, your loss.

Anyway,
what did Sarah Jane say
about me winning this prize?

Nothing.
We're not really talking.

She's being such a mum.

Yeah, well, it's probably
best she doesn't know.

Careful, Clyde.
Even star pupils need
to watch where they're going.

-Sir.
-So, how're you feeling?
Um, nervous?

Weirded out.

I mean teachers
are never this friendly.

You see,
diligence has its rewards.

Perhaps now you'll
put the same enthusiasm
into your other school work.

-Mr Chandra? Park Vale?
-Yes.

Mr Harding will
receive you upstairs.

-Great.
-Come this way.

Okay, everyone,
follow me.

-It's very exciting.
-I'm very excited, as well.

-Actually much, much smaller
than you'd imagine.
-Really?

It's very surprising because
you always think of the
Mona Lisa as absolutely huge.

What do you reckon, Luke?

Who's got
the more enigmatic smile?

Me or Lisa?

I really don't understand,
why is the Mona Lisa
so special?

It's just brown.

Maybe when you see
the real thing,
you'll understand.

I don't really get art.

Careful, it's an art gallery.

You're not supposed to
pick it up either, okay.

You look, you don't touch.

But this isn't art.
It's something else.

Clyde.

This is Mr Harding.
Curator of the gallery.

Clyde Langer.

-We're really proud of him.
-Congratulations, Clyde.

You're very talented.

Such a handsome boy.

Oh. This is my assistant,
Miss Trupp. Now...

You really are
so gifted, Clyde.

-Cheers.
-When I saw your picture,
I knew you'd win.

It wasn't up to me,
but if it had been
you'd definitely have won.

Well, you did! So...
(CHUCKLING)

It's all turned out
for the best.

Miss Trupp,

perhaps you should
go and check the
final preparations.

Oh. Yes.

Big day for all of us.

Clyde, follow me.

Your masterpiece awaits.

Come along, chop-chop!

This place
should be clear by now.

(DOOR SHUTS)

Do you know how lucky you are?

Lionel worships you.

If only he looked at me
with the same eyes.

WOMAN: Oh,
quit your moaning, love.

Do us all a favour.

Who... Who said that?

You can hear me?

Well, now there's a first.

So let's try this for another.

(MISS TRUPP SCREAMING)

(LAUGHING)

And here we are.
In pride of place.

No way.

Is something wrong?

It's just...

My work in a proper gallery.

We told you, Clyde,
it's brilliant.

(CHEERING)

(CHANTING)

Shut up!

Agreed. Some order, please.

-MRS TAYLOR: Whoop!
-Mrs Taylor.

Apart from the obvious
artistic flair,

your imagination
is so impressive.

The detail in the weaponry!

I don't know where
you get your inspiration.

Please.

They're Sontaran
blasters, aren't they?

Well spotted.

That's why you didn't
want Mum to know.

Yeah, oh, and don't tell her
I've been drawing K9, either.

You know, I always
used to play this
sort of stuff down.

I thought people
would laugh at me.

You mean you
thought drawing
wasn't cool.

Something like that.

Well, it is cool
and believe me
no one's laughing.

When I was younger,
no brothers or sisters.

I used to draw, for company.

But maybe I could really
do something with this.

And so to the prize.

Prepare to meet the Mona Lisa!

The Mona Lisa,

a painting begun
by Leonardo da Vinci in 1503
in Florence.

But finished only
shortly before
he died in 1519.

For over 500 years,

the Mona Lisa's beauty
has remained undimmed.

She has been gazed upon
by millions in her Paris home.

Now, she is here.

Feast your eyes,
and lose your hearts.

I give you...

The Mona Lisa!

She has let herself go.

(ALL SNICKERING)

LUKE: Isn't that
his assistant?

Security!

The Mona Lisa has been stolen.

MR SMITH: Excuse me,
Sarah Jane,

I am detecting unusual
brain pattern activity

and your ability
to concentrate
appears compromised.

-Are you unwell?
-No. I'm fine, Mr Smith.

-It's Luke.
-But Luke has perfect health.

That is how he was made
by the Bane.

Yes, I know.
The perfect human being.

But nothing stays perfect
forever, does it?

I am sorry.
I'm not sure
that I understand.

Luke isn't ill.
He's growing up.

I believe it is a normal part
of breeding patterns
in most species.

Yes, I know.

And I've tried so hard
to make Luke's life
as normal as possible.

In a way it helped make mine
a little more normal, too.

Before I met Luke, who was I?

A lonely, frosty
woman in the big house

who knew more about
creatures from outer-space
than she did humans.

I have always considered
the intricacy of human nature

excessively complicated
in comparison to
most other life forms.

You and me both, old friend.

And being a mum is just
about as complicated
as it gets.

Most parents have years
to get used to it.

I'm still finding my feet
and already
I'm realising that

one day it's going to be over.

One day Luke will be gone.

One day, perhaps, very soon.

I told them security
had to be improved here.

I told them,
after that Cup of Athelstan
fiasco at Easter.

Oh, my beautiful Mona Lisa!

The French will have my head!

If you could all stay calm
as we move out

and let the police
do their job.

There's something
freaky about this.

Oh, here we go.

Just because something shady
happens doesn't mean
there are aliens behind it.

When my bike got nicked,

did you think
that was ET the ASBO,
cycling home?

-Did I mention aliens?
-Rani's right.

Why would they put
a picture of Miss Trupp
in the Mona Lisa's place?

Maybe she's behind it all.

Maybe it's her calling card.

(GASPS) "The Truppmeistress
has struck! "

Even if this isn't alien,
it's weird enough
for Sarah Jane.

We should call her.
No. We don't need her.

-We can do this ourselves.
-(MONA LISA SMIRKING)

Okay, then.

But first we need
to lose my dad.

Have you seen Jonathan? No?

Are you sure?

Excuse me, Mr Chandra.

-Yes, what is it, Luke?
-I need the toilet.

Me too, sir, I'm busting.

-And me.
-Okay. But be quick.

-Sir.
-And then straight
to the coach.

Nice one, Luke.

-What?
-Good cover story.

No, I really need the loo.

Oh, well,
like Dad says, "be quick"!

MR SMITH: I am picking up
news reports from
the International Gallery.

The Mona Lisa
has been stolen.

The Mona Lisa?
I don't believe it.

The security
at the International Gallery
was supposed to be massive.

So the reports suggest.

All the same,
if it hasn't been taken
by inter-galactic art thieves,

it's not really my thing.

Or are you trying to
distract me, Mr Smith?

I simply thought
the news report
would be of interest.

Okay. Show me.

It's understood that
the theft was discovered

as the Mona Lisa
was about to be unveiled
for a party of students

from Park Vale
Comprehensive
in Ealing.

-What?
-Park Vale pupil, Clyde Langer

won first prize
in the gallery's

Artists of the Future
competition.

This is Lizo Mzimba
reporting from
the International Gallery.

Then Luke
must have been there too.

He never said anything.

Not a word.

(WHISPERING) Police!

We'll never get past them.

There has
to be another way in.

We need a map.

Like this one?

You see,
you never turn down
a freebie, Luke.

(MOBILE RINGING)

Luke's not answering.

The gallery
prohibits the use
of mobile telephones.

But I'm accessing information
from the Metropolitan Police
computer system

that you may find of interest.

What exactly am I looking at?

This is a crime scene
photograph of the Mona Lisa.

Mr Smith,
that isn't the Mona Lisa.

My infra-red
analysis confirms
the brush-stroke patterns

of Leonardo da Vinci.

This is the Mona Lisa.

But it can't be.
Who is that woman?

Phyllis Trupp,
personal assistant
to the gallery's curator.

Her most detailed
personal profile can be found
on peapodsoulmates.com

where she lists
her interests
as salsa dancing.

She says
she is open minded
and willing to try...

Thank you, Mr Smith.
That will do.

-What's happened to her?
-I can only surmise
molecular trans-placement.

She is still alive
and conscious.

But trapped in the canvas
of a 500-year-old painting.

What could have caused this?

Insufficient data.

So this isn't anything
like a straight-forward
art theft, is it?

It would seem not.

Which means,
the other question is,
if that's Phyllis Trupp,

where on earth
is the Mona Lisa?

This place is like a maze!

Or like finding your way
through Level Four of
Alien Devastation Three.

(SCOFFS)

I thought you said
you could find
your way with that map?

-Men and maps!
-Hey!

I can read a map.
I was in the cubs.

Well, until they
kicked me out.

But you don't want
to hear about that.

Clyde. Yes, I know
my picture would look
great in your lounge.

Just get your dad
to make me an offer.

I don't want
your painting, Clyde.

I want to know
what happened
to the gun that was in it.

Galaxia's gun!

Whose?

Okay, so I gave them names.

Can we move on now?
What matters is...

What are you doing here?

The police are conducting
an investigation.

They don't need a bunch
of schoolchildren

roaming around,
disturbing evidence.

Well, it isn't just
your Mona Lisa that's
been stolen now, is it?

One of the guns in Clyde's
painting has vanished. Look.

It's dry.

The gun wasn't painted out,
Mr Harding. It was taken.

Whatever we're dealing with,
its more than
just an art thief.

Oh, you better
believe it, sugar.

-She's got my gun!
-(LAUGHING)

CHANDRA: She went
to the toilet and that's
the last I saw of her.

No, Gita,
the police won't
let me back in.

No, I can't ring her.

No phones allowed inside.
Look, I'll call you back.

Haresh, hello.

Sarah Jane.
I suppose you know
about the Mona Lisa?

Of course.
The crime of the century
and the story of the year.

-Where's Luke?
-The thing is they've
closed the gallery

and Luke,
Rani and Clyde
are still inside so...

Oh, why don't
you look after
the rest of the kids,

and I'll see what I can do.

In my line of work
you get a knack
for opening closed doors.

-You sure? Thank you.
-Mmm.

Mrs Taylor, kids, come on.

Quickly. Move.

-CHANDRA: Phones away.
Are you chewing?
-BOY: No, sir.

Put your phones away please.

-Thank you. Come on.
-Okay.

Who are you?

(BLOWS RASPBERRY)

And I thought you were
supposed to be an art expert!

I am the Mona Lisa.

No, but really?

Yeah, really.

You can't fake
this kinda class.

You can't be the Mona Lisa,

you have to be some
sort of alien manifestation.

Ooh. And why's that, then?

Because on Earth,
women in paintings

don't just jump out
of their frames.

And nick guns from
someone else's painting.

Do you know how long
it took me to paint that?

(TREMBLING MOCKINGLY)

Hmm.

Not bad.

Not in my league, of course.

But then Leo
was a bit of a ledge
even back then.

Although he had to blag
the oils off his weirdo
neighbour to paint me.

Okay. Say that's true.

Now you're out of your frame,
what is it you want?

I've just had five centuries
hanging on a wall, sugar.

What is it you think I want?

It's time I had a bit of fun.

And I think
I'll start with some
target practice.

Run for it!

(LAUGHING)

So it's just you
and me now, Harders.

Sonic Scarlet,

my favourite shade.

Oh, boy.
That's it, now I have
seen everything.

We so have to get
hold of Sarah Jane.

-And I mean now.
-No.

What's got in to you?

Why are you being
so weird about your mum?

Luke and Sarah Jane
have had a barney. Rani.

Never mind that.
Where is everyone?

On the coach.
My dad'll be going
mental by now.

What about the police.
Forensics should be
crawling all over this place.

Something's wrong.

It is.

So very, very wrong.

A whole new kind of wrong.

Mia Bella!

Is it...

Is it really you?

Oh, go on then, touch me.

I know you want to.

I've seen the way
you look at me.

I remember
when you came
to the Louvre.

The Louvre?

Actually, every time you came.

Twenty seconds,
that's all anyone
gets to see me

and then, "move along
s'il vous plait".

You always
put up quite a struggle.

It's a shame they had
to ban you in the end.

(LAUGHING)

It is you!

It really is you!

And you are going
to have to get used to that

because we've got
a lot of work to do.

I don't understand.

We have to find my brother.

Definite traces
of alien energy.

(SONIC WHIRRING)

Two of them.

He's here somewhere.

I know he is.

But there's nothing to suggest
in any academic work

that you had a brother.

Not had, Harders, have.

And he's here.

Somewhere amongst
this tat just waiting for me.

You mean another painting.

Yes, I can see how you
got the job here, Harders.

And that's why I need you.

You know every brush
stroke in this place.

Well, what does he look like,
your brother?

I've never seen him
so I haven't got a clue.

But he'll have been painted
around the same time as me,

the same place as me.

Next door, in fact.

I've got it!

Follow me!

-Oh, it's locked.
-We have to find a phone.

I don't care
what you say, Luke,

what's happened
to those people
is beyond freaky.

We're calling your mum.

I don't think
there's any need.

Her car's here.

Residual alien energy.

But if this is,
or was, a painting
by Leonardo,

how is that possible?

Do you know, Phyllis?

I know you can hear me,
even though you can't answer.

I promise you,
I'm going to get you
out of there.

MR HARDING: But what
I'm thinking is...

If he was painted
at the same time as you,
this has to be him.

Has to be.

Not only a contemporary
of Leonardo,
but a neighbour in Florence.

Ah? Him?

He's not much
of a looker, is he?

Giuseppe Di Cattivo.
1450 to 1518,

whose work is often
compared to his more
famous contemporary,

Hieronymus Bosch.

Poor Giuseppe.

He died in a lunatic asylum.

Hmm.

No, no, this isn't him.

But...

Come out, come out,
whoever you are!

I can hear you breathing!

Who would've thought
a painting would have
such good hearing,

Mona Lisa?

But then Leonardo
was such
a stickler for detail.

On the subject of detail...

Mind filling
in the obvious blank?

My name is Sarah Jane Smith.

And that is
a Sontaran blaster,

do you mind telling
me where you got it?

Ooh, I just took it
from the painting

that lad Clyde did,
'cause I thought
it looked a little bit flash.

Oh, Clyde.

You'd better not have
harmed him or his friends!

Oh, no,
don't concern yourself.
They're perfectly safe.

I'm Lionel Harding,
curator of the museum.

Mr Harding,
whatever is happening here,
don't worry.

I can help you.

Thank you,
I'm not sure I need it.

Ah, you see Harders here,

he's me number one fan.

Listen to me,
she is dangerous.

Look what
she did to Miss Trupp.

Oh!

Now you don't want
to worry about that
old trout, do you Harders?

I mean, you never
did before, did you?

And, let's face it,
she never was an oil painting.

At least not till now!
(LAUGHING)

Release her. Now!

Ooh, I might think about it.

Depends if you
stay out of me way.

Sarah Jane Smith?

Sarah Jane.

Now where do I know
that name?

Oh! Ooh.

Ooh!
That Sarah Jane.

Seems like no one
wants you around, Sazza.

Not even your son.

-What?
-Hmm, heard him
talking before.

He'd like you
to keep your nose out.

And so would I.

I'm sorry,
whatever you're planning,
I am not stepping aside.

That's your choice.

No, Mia Bella!

(DEEP GROWLING)

What is that?

That is my brother.

Is it me, or did things
just get uncomfortable?

What's going on?

Well, give me a second,
then I'll put you
in the picture.

No!

That's Mum!

-Sarah Jane?
-Mum?

Luke?

I've found her.

No. Mum!

(SARAH JANE SCREAMING)

(LAUGHING)

And that is how she'll stay

forever!
(LAUGHING)

Run!

I have not been released
from wood and paint
to be trapped in here!

A legend, a painting
too terrifying
to be exhibited.

Once we are united

your reign
of fire and sulphur
shall begin

and the world
will be a rage of flames
at our feet.