All language subtitles for Southern Charm S08E11 Guess Whos Coming to Friendsgiving 1080p AMZN WEB-DL DDP2 0 H 264-NTb_track4_[eng]

Previously on
"Southern Charm"...

You are a crazy person.

For the record,
we're not friends anymore.

♪ The kids go loco

After what seemed to be
our last supper,

some of us were back
to being breakfast buddies.

Hey, guys.

Where'd you get an omelet from?

In there.

What kind of person
acts normal

the day after
a psychotic break?

♪ He'll swing
this game, don't you know? ♪

And now that the cat
is out of the bag

with Whitney and me...
- Naomie, Whitney.

[knocks]

Craig, you sound like
a----ing crackhead.

Austen was inspired
to finally

lock it down with Olivia.

You're someone
that I genuinely care about.

Let's just go from there.

I really do like you,
like, a lot.

I want to date you.

♪ You got
to hand it to the man ♪

♪ He's making it look
so easy ♪

And it was supposed to be
all fun and games at Auldbrass

till one game of egg toss
cracked the peace.

[laughs]

Wait, y'all.

Hey!

- It fell.
- It did not break.

- So?
- You----ing idiot.

Shep, you can't call her
an idiot.

♪ Ooh, ooh, whoa

I'm, like, exhausted.

And how much
can you take before--

I absolutely break.

You met the one girl
in the world

that loves you for who you are.

Apologizing is not asking you
to change who you are.

I'll apologize because
I am in love with her.

So, for once,
Shep checked his ego.

I want you to work
on being kind to people.

- Yeah.
- That's all I'm saying.

You're right.

I'm an every now and then, jerk,

but I never want
to be a jerk to you.

And I'm sorry
that you're upset.

Because some things
are worth fighting for.

♪ It's easy as making
you think that you love me ♪

Mm-hmm.

[upbeat music]

♪

All right.

I don't care if
it's dirty or clean.

I'm just washing it anyways.

♪

Craig, this is called
de-wrinkling.

I know you don't wear clothes.

You're always naked.

[upbeat music]

♪

Check those out.

What in the world?

It's like, my last trip,
I didn't unpack.

- Nippy out.
- Really?

I think it's nice.

You're gonna love
the lunch I've prepared.

Oh, well, that's lovely.

I've got a 1998
Chateau Lynch-Bages.

- One of my favorites.
- Good.

- Thank you.
- Uh-huh.

Baguette.

That's, like, a harder cheese,
which you prefer.

I like brie.

We have silver
cheese implements,

and is that a paper napkin?

You know better
than that, Whitney.

Paper napkins.
- I know.

We're outside.

What do you want,
a linen napkin?

Of course.

[phone ringing]

This is Austen calling me.

Yo.

- What's up, man?
- I'm talking with Mom.

I made lunch.

Wine, cheese,
and French bread.

Yeah, yeah, yeah,

Hi.

Thank you.

I'm leaving
for Texas in the morning.

However, Mom might be amenable
to showing up.

If you could fax us
over the guest list--

Sure.

[laughter]

- Let me talk to him.
- Hold on.

Here's Mom.
- Hey, Austen.

So, you know, of the group,

I'm closest to Madison
and Naomie.

Are either one of them coming?

Huh?

Why is that?

Flame?

[gasps]
Oh, my God.

[coughs]

♪

- Omelet.
- Dear Omelet.

You got to stop
calling him fat, Mom.

Really?

He's just a little bit--

Yes, on the chubby side.

Mom, be nice.

Anyways, what's going on?

We just went to Auldbrass,
and it was a lot of fun.

Like, I had a lot of fun.

Maybe I had
a little too much fun.

What is that
supposed to mean?

Uh, well,
I mean, we were only

supposed to stay one night,
but I ended up staying

an extra night with Whitney.

No.

And it was just, like,
very surprising

and very, you know.

Wow.

Yeah.

It's never even
come into my mind

that I might be attracted
to Whitney.

So I don't really know
when that change happened.

But, yeah,
I'm just going with it.

I think the fact that--
that he's older than you are,

it's a better fit for you.

Because you're smart,
you've been through a lot,

so you need somebody who has
been through life a little bit

to understand you.

That's a very French thing
of you to say.

I feel like most moms--
you know most of my friends,

like, don't tell their parents

people they hook up with
and stuff.

- Really?
- Yeah.

They do not talk about that.

Well, that's sad because
we've done it before you

so we know a little bit more.
- Ew.

[laughter]

That's not a visual I want.
- Oh, come on.

You think you were born--

Mom, stop!

Ugh.

The brie is amazing.

So you and Naomie--

I mean, yeah.

[plucky orchestral music]

Now if you would just
settle down, get married

before I kick the bucket.

Don't feel pressured
but, you know,

I'm living on borrowed time.

I might shuffle off
any day now.

Right.

We'll see what we can do.

The trouble is Craig
may kill you on the spot.

[laughs]

[upbeat music]

We have to get a bunch
of sh-- for the turkey.

I've actually never been
to a Friendsgiving.

I must not have any friends.

[laughs]

Is Naomie going to be
at Friendsgiving?

Yeah, but now she's
dating Whitney so...

Are they--they're not, like,
boyfriend and girlfriend.

I don't care.

I just think she's really lost.

But, you know what?
If they're happy, great.

I can relate to being lost,
but didn't end up

sleeping with Whitney.

If I was banging Whitney
I'd be thinking about, too,

so...

But I will
officiate the wedding.

I will be the flower boy,
whatever they need.

As long as this means
that Naomie

is going to kind of back off
and leave me and Paige alone,

I'm all--
I'm here for it.

But if anyone thinks
that Naomie isn't over you,

they're an idiot.

That's why when I first saw her
at Kathryn's birthday,

the first thing I said
to her was...

girls expect girls
to fight,

and it's just like,
no, we don't have time.

- Girls first, then boys.
- She agreed.

And so I was like, "Oh, OK.

Maybe she's like, a real girl."

Like, maybe it's--
- Right.

But I will say that I was,
like, perfectly fine with her

at Auldbrass.

Obviously, she's going to do
everything to make you say,

"Oh, wow, that was really cool
for her to do."

Like, you're an idiot.

♪

I love going to
grocery stores with you.

[laughs]
Wait, why?

'Cause they're just fun.

Being long distance
with Paige makes me

really appreciate
the simple things.

Do you know how
to fry a turkey?

Mm-hmm.
I've been a part of it.

Doing chores together
is something

that we don't get to do a lot.

We're going to basically
soak it

in this saltwater mixture
until tomorrow.

OK.

And it might sound silly,

but I think
if you can have fun

in the grocery store
with someone

that you are a good couple.

So we need kosher salt, sugar,
garlic, cloves, peppercorns,

oranges, lemons,
rosemary, and mayonnaise.

Whoa, OK, let's start
with the first thing.

OK.

There's a cart
there if you need it.

Oh, cute.

I'm gonna be
the cutest mom ever.

I want to take a picture.

♪

- Oranges.
- Three lemons.

Got 'em.

Should we get sausages
to grill?

Sure.

Cajun style hot,
sweet Italian.

- You already have one.
- Aw.

- [laughs]
- I think you're hilarious.

I love it.

Coming up...

Austen's Friendsgiving.

Well, I didn't know about it.

- You didn't know about it?
- Uh-uh.

I mean, we know why
I wasn't invited,

but I thought y'all were cool.

[upbeat music]

♪

What is up, girl?

Let me see that rock.
Ooh!

What?

- How've you been?
- Good.

How are you?
- Good.

I need you to get me
shredding for the wedding.

- Workout Barbie's here.
- Body-ody!

- Workout!
- Hi.

Hello.
Ooh!

No.
[laughs]

You got it.
You got it.

[laughs]
- Here we go.

[laughter]
- Were you warming up?

I hope you're ready.

We're just going to
get right into it.

- OK.
- OK.

Just lean forward
and run like the wind.

My workout routine
is five to six days a week,

sometimes two times a day.

Let's go!
[screaming]

Come on!

My fiancé is hot as [BLEEP],
so I have to work out.

33, OK.

Get clipped up right here.

Oh, if she beats me,
I swear to God--

I own more athleisure wear
than I do actual clothes.

Go, baby, go!

Probably, like, 100 pairs
of leggings.

- My legs are on----ing fire!
- Whoo!

50 sports bras, 10 sneakers.

♪

- Done. Let's go outside.
- OK.

♪

- Slam it!
- Whoo!

14, 13-- who are you mad at?

Let's go.

Whoo!
Whoo!

Go ahead, Venita.

Did you just untie
your shoe to take a break?

[chuckles]

I'm stalling.

I love Madison to death.

But, my God,
if she ever asked me

to work out with her
ever again,

I might end the friendship.

Two-- come on.

Venita, you got
to lock a man down.

This is how you get him,
right here.

Venita needs to call me
after she has a baby.

Things change.
- Done.

Whoo!

Thank God
for plastic surgery,

'cause that sh--
will save you,

if you know what I mean.

- Whoo!
- See y'all.

Bye.

It's like a love-hate
relationship with him.

You got to look good
for the wedding, though.

Well, that's a year from now.

Oh my god, is Hudson going
to bring the rings down?

I mean, every time
I think about that I like--

I feel like I'm gonna cry.

Hudson thinks
the world of Brett.

It's the cutest thing ever.

Brett has taught him
how to play baseball,

and Hudson's
even said himself

that he does a really
good job of parenting him,

which I told him
never tell your dad that.

Are you doing Charleston
and all or you thinking

outside of Charleston?
- I'm thinking Charleston.

OK.

But it doesn't matter, really.

When I asked Hudson
about the wedding--

whether it should
be small or big--

he said, "I think
it should be big" because

we knew he was the one.

But I don't need
the biggest, largest wedding.

That's not what this is about.

It's just about
the three of us.

I'm just doing 50 people.

That's small,
but that's good, though.

Yeah.

You'll be able
to talk to everybody

and you'll know
everybody there.

Well, I'll tell you where
the party's not gonna be--

Austen's Friendsgiving.

Oh, well, I didn't
know about it.

- You didn't know about it?
- Uh-uh.

- That's weird.
- Yeah.

I mean, we know why
I wasn't invited.

I thought y'all were cool.
- Yeah, I think we are.

It's interesting.
- Whew!

♪

Hey, Shep, I'm here...

OK.

With a lot of heavy things.

OK.

Oh, oh, oh--

Here.

You should have called me,
and I'd come down.

I'm strong these days.

I work out every now and then.

Since what went down
at Auldbrass, of course,

I regret the whole thing.
You know?

What are we cooking
for a Friendsgiving?

We're cooking
a lot of things.

I'm very much trying
to be more considerate,

and more thoughtful,
and more selfless

than I have in the past.

A lot of things?
- Yeah.

Broccoli rice casserole
and green bean casserole.

What do I have to do--
would you like me to do?

I'm gonna put you in
charge of the easiest recipe.

- Which one's that?
- Banana pudding.

Good.
I love banana pudding.

Do you want me to unpeel
them all and just-- no.

OK. Why don't you
follow the recipe?

Look up Not Yo Mama's
Banana Pudding.

One bag of cookies.

Layer bananas on top.

So here's a bowl.

First things first,
the cookies.

I have no idea what I'm doing.

I've never even made pudding.

In a bowl, combine the milk
and pudding mix and blend well.

Don't screw it up.

I can barely boil water.

Put the bananas-- oh, no, no,
no, no, no, no, no, no--

and layer bananas on top.

- Ah!
- Gross.

You go, girl.
[laughs]

- Like that?
- There you go.

You're doing it.
Look at you.

You feeding him cookies?

No!
Shep, no!

You don't feed dogs--

♪

- You want to break up?
- Finally.

This is your
exit opportunity.

All right.

Speaking of, Babe,
you just need

to be aware that when we're
around our friends who don't

really understand
how we banter,

they view it as, wow,
he's really an asshole,

and she puts up with that.

And it makes me look bad too.
- I know.

I don't want people to think
that our relationship

is a bad relationship
because it's not.

And so I'm learning on the fly.

Well, I'm done.

Look at you.

I'm proud of you.
- Ah.

Coming up...

Do you want me
to pull it out?

Because I don't have
a poultry disorder like you do.

That's grossing you out?
- Holy crap.

[upbeat music]

♪

OK.

This is great.
- OK.

I think it's all set.

I mean, if it was me
it'd be, like, paper plates

and, like, Solo cups.

So it looks amazing.
- Hire me for your next party.

Look how good this looks.

It looks so good.

Thanksgiving in the Kroll
family is about family--

all of my aunts
and my cousins,

and football and drinking,

and a lot, a lot of food.

Doesn't the centerpiece
look so nice?

Doesn't it say Mom?

It says Wendy so much--

- It says Wendy and Barbara...
- Yeah.

Combined.

I mean, the Krolls
have been doing

Thanksgiving
at my Aunt Barbara's house

for as long as I can remember.

Sometimes the sisters
like to fight over

whose house they go to,

but my Aunt Barbara's house
is the epitome

of Thanksgiving.

Let's go inside and...
- Make punch?

Drink.

As we got older and more
interested in cooking,

they put me in charge of
the Thanksgiving punch bowl.

And every year the punch bowl
is different.

My God,
look at all that bourbon.

So I'm in charge
of keeping people lubricated.

Grab the pomegranate juice.
- Yeah.

OK.

And we have oranges?

Of course we have oranges.
I picked it all up, of course.

OK.

I need a knife
and hopefully a zester.

So--

You know what pisses
me off in the kitchen?

This.
- What the--

I've never used
this once in my life.

Those are for
mashed potatoes.

And I just can't close
the drawer after it's in there.

And then I try to open
the drawer, and it gets stuck.

And it's always
that that gets stuck.

Why did Mom give
it to you because she

thinks you're
going to be making

mashed potatoes all the time?
- Yeah.

She gave it to me,
like, last Christmas.

And I assume she's
going to get me--

Look, look.
That's a zester right there.

I mean, it's a cheese grater.

It's not a zester
but it will work.

Right?

Like, the--

Nice.

I got you, Sis.

That works.

That's a lot
of zest in there, Katie.

It's the zest of one orange.

That's what it calls for.

You're going
to get people drunk.

♪

- We ready for turkey stuff?
- Yeah.

It's gonna be gross, though.
- OK, well, get a towel.

You look cute.

- Thank you.
- No color.

Yeah.

I can't with
the not black anymore.

I'm so over it.
- [laughs]

It's not who I am as
a human to not wear black.

Why don't you wear
black down here?

Because everyone's like,
basic beige Betty down here

and, like, I try--

I'm trying to fit in but--

It's a very pastel,
like, floral city too.

Yeah.
I can't.

OK.

So I need help taking
that raw turkey out

of that vat of liquid
that we put it in last night.

OK.

And we're putting
it in what when we--

We have to get it to the--
to Austen's aunt's house.

Yes, I understand that.

Do you know how I feel
about touching raw poultry?

There was a 200-person chicken
dinner at the fire hall

when I was in high school.

But when you
take the turkey out

of the pot, what do you put--

Baby, we have pans
over there.

OK.
That's what I was asking.

And they put the cooked
chickens back into the boxes

that the raw chicken was
brought to the kitchen with.

Let's find the paper towels.
This is gonna be disgusting.

Oh, here's a roll.

And, like, 130 people
were hospitalized

after this chicken dinner.

And I think in my head I
just was like, if you touch

a raw bird, you're gonna die.

This is gonna taste so good
when it's done, though.

OK.

That's what's getting
me through this.

Do you want me
to pull it out?

Because I don't have poultry
disorder like you do.

All right.

Well, you just have to go
wash your hands afterwards.

OK, obviously.

Wait.

Holy crap.

That's a big bird.

Hold on.

You can't they hold
on when I'm mid--

Well, I'm gonna dump it out.

- Dump it.
- OK.

Now we're both touching it.

Want to grab the gizzards out?
- Now?

Yeah.

What do I do,
stick my hand in here?

Yeah.

Oh my God, I literally
feel like I'm a doctor,

and I'm helping someone
deliver their child.

Oh, my God.
That--

Is this grossing you out?

Yeah.
There you go.

That's the "gibbert."

- The what?
- The giblets that you make--

use for making gravy.
- Oh, yeah, the giblets.

OK.
Where am I putting this?

- Just throw it in there.
- Throw it in where?

Don't throw it.
Don't splash it on me.

OK.

It's not that gross.

Come wash your hands with me.

♪

[knocks]

- Hello.
- Hi.

Happy Friendsgiving.

Happy Friendsgiving.
That's right.

- Hi.
- Good to see you.

Last time you saw Katie,
it was at Thanksgiving.

Right?
- I know.

Right?
- That is so funny.

What did you bring?

I'm making grape
jelly meatballs.

I've never ever
heard of this.

I've never heard
of this before.

What is it?
- How are you cooking it?

I'm talking about some
Moncks Corner stuff.

It's one of those small town
recipes made with chili sauce,

grape jelly, and ketchup.

OK, OK.

This is my special recipe.

I got it from my mom.

It's so good.

Everyone will be like,
"Oh damn, this girl can cook."

Y'all are going
to like it, I promise.

My mom also used to make
a pie with Mellow Yellow.

Hate on it all you want,

but I'm telling you,
that sh-- was good.

Austen, is Olivia coming?

What's the latest?
What's the tea?

So I tried to tell her at
Auldbrass that, like, I think

that we should stop this whole,
like, song and dance and just,

like, try to make
something happen here.

I've been thinking about you
a lot because I really

do like you, like, a lot.

Like, hey, I don't want
to date other people.

I want to date you.

- OK, and--
- That's where it's at.

That's--that's where
it's at.

- OK, I like that.
- That's it.

That's all I got.
- Did you wash your hands?

Why are you touching things
with your meat hands?

Meat's going on this.

I know, but you're
touching other things.

I'm just saying,
wash your meat hands.

Coming up...

I brought squash casserole
and a salad.

Which I don't like.

I don't like that.

Where do you
think the cheese is?

In one of those bags.

Oh, God.

- Shep.
- Hello?

- Yo, what's up?
- You look so cute!

Oh, my God.
Thank you.

Oh, my God.

Thank God you're in black
and, like, leather.

Happy Friendsgiving.

- Hello.
- Hi.

- How are you?
- How are you?

- You look so chic.
- Oh, my God, thank you.

Yeah, so we brined
the turkey last night.

- How many pounds is it?
- 16.

- A 16-pound turkey?
- Yeah.

Have you ever had fried turkey?
- No, never.

It's----ing awesome.

We need to get
the oil heating

ASAP, because it's probably, like,

gonna take up to an hour.
- OK.

We'll get
this show on the road.

Hold on.

Then we got to get this set up.
- Yeah, I know.

I know.

We have to, like,
do this, like, now.

- No, I know.
- OK.

Wait, dude.

How much peanut oil do we need?

Not that much, but I just
brought it just in case.

Where do you think
we should do it?

We should do it right here.

This is the smartest area.

Like, don't you think
that we should do it,

like- OK, all right.

Because then if
sh-- goes wrong you,

like-- you kick it into
the pool or something.

Um-- this is fine.

♪

- Oh, my God, hi.
- Hi!

Hi!

How are-- oh, my God,
you look amazing.

- Thanks.
- Hi.

I haven't seen you
in so long.

- The pants--
- Oh.

How are you?
- Hi, Naomie.

- How are you?
- I'm sorry.

I'm about to get--
- You're fine.

You're fine.

Guys, this is heavy,
these dishes...

Oh, my God.

Look at that.

That I definitely
made myself.

I brought squash casserole
and a salad.

Which I don't like.

I don't like that.

♪

- Want a drink?
- I do.

OK.
We have...

I do.

A bourbon prosecco punch.

- Oh, OK.
- Let me know...

- Thank you.
- If it tastes good.

Where's Austen?

I think he's outside
doing the turkey,

which makes me nervous.
- At least they're outside.

But at least--
at least I'm not there.

Mm.

I just don't want it
to blow up in my face.

Yeah?
- Mm.

- Ah!
- That's so good.

That's, like,
bourbon heavy too.

I don't know
if I like bourbon.

♪

I would say it's pretty
obvious Paige

doesn't seem too pleased
with me.

What--did you just
come down here for the week?

Mm-hmm.

Like, the week--the weekend?

Thursday I got here.

I have no idea what Craig
is saying to her.

All I know is that I'm just
trying to be, like,

totally friendly and copacetic,

and it's, like,
really not working out for me.

OK.

Let's get the peanut oil
boiling or whatever the hell.

Yeah.
It's just this.

Yeah, because this
is a massive bird.

Instructions.

Oh, we don't need
the instructions.

We need a lighter.

Oh, boy.

Craig acts like
he knows what he's doing,

but I know
somewhere back there,

he really does not know
what he's doing.

I know what I'm doing,
I've just never done it before.

But I've been
with people that did it.

Don't get it on the side
because it's flammable.

We don't want the oil
to ever hit the flame.

Well, you should
have definitely

said that because it
definitely splashed.

I will say the margin
of error here is small,

and the turkey
could possibly explode.

If your turkey is not thawed
and you put it in there,

it will----ing
shoot to the moon.

So this could be
like a rocket.

And usually people do this
on their deck

'cause they're stupid.

And then your deck
catches on fire,

then your house
catches on fire.

- Oh, my God.
- Hey!

Hi, guys!
Hi!

Katie, what a surprise!
- Yeah.

Oh, I didn't know
you were going to be here.

I can't do anything
until I put these down.

Please help me.
- Hi, Shep.

Paige, I'm gonna start
calling you SkyMiles.

- Dude, I'm almost literally--
- Yeah?

You gold plum?

- Like, I'm almost to silver.
- Hello, Kathryn.

- Hey, you look so cute.
- How are you?

You look so cute.

Happy Friendsgiving.

Shep made this banana pudding
all by himself.

I did.

It's the first--it's the first
time I've ever made anything.

- It's so cute.
- I know.

Isn't it cute?

I thought this is the cutest
dish that's ever been made.

[laughter]

Propane tank.

Oh, there you go.

Come help me light this.

I don't-- I don't know.

This isn't supposed to
be one of the problems.

Where's the boys?

Outside.
They're frying it.

They screwing everything up
out there?

- Who knows?
- Good.

Stupid.
Stupid.

We need a windshield.

Here.

Right here.

- Literally a shield.
- Yup.

OK.

Let's Captain America
this sh--.

The wind's coming from here.

- Is it?
- Yeah.

Wait.

Why is it not lighting?

We need more of your shield.

Oh!

All right.
Good job.

- Hello.
- Hi.

- Hey.
- Hey, Marcie.

Look, I brought--

Sweet potato casserole.

- Tried my best.
- OK.

The marshmallows go
on later and they brown.

Yes.
The marshmallows must roast.

Ooh, I love it.

Did you-- is that
a family recipe?

- Yes.
- Good.

♪

Boom.

Look at that.

Yeah, man, listen to it.

I know, I just don't want
the flame to go out.

- Well, the fact that it
- ing lit makes me happy.

And then,
when the oil is hot enough...

we're going to slowly
place this in there.

OK, good.

Hi.

Hey, Leva.

Guys, my arm is
going to fall off.

Oh, god.

And it's Craig's fault
because he said

he needed a lot of gravy.

Mommy's gonna put
sunglasses on because

it's gonna hurt mommy's eyes.

My yucky gravy
looks really good.

I think you're gonna like it.

I don't think
I'm going to like it.

- What about my stuffing?
- No.

That's a pretty firm stance.

Oh my god, I love it.

I want to see what you made.
[chiming]

- It's just stuffing.
- Who's chiming?

- And then--
- Oh, is that the gravy?

- Yeah.
- Wait.

Those look done.
Those are done.

Those are done, Kathryn.

They're still
red on the inside.

Where's Olivia?
Is she here?

I think she's--
yeah.

I mean, I think she's coming.

When I was texting her,
she was coming.

Speak of the devil.
[chatter]

Hey.
[laughs]

I brought mashed potatoes.

- Watch the gravy.
- Oh my god, you made that?

No. No, not me.

I know how to order takeout.

- What are--
- We're gonna lift this.

- OK.
- Austen.

Austen.

Shep, OK, dude.

I have the bird in my hand.

Bird in the hand's worth
two in the pot, I guess.

Shep, my hands are dirty.
I'm gonna wash my hands.

I'll be back.

That scares me.

You ever deep fry a turkey?

Never. Never.

Craig tells me he
knows what he's doing.

Craig has this weird
thing where he acts like he

knows what he's doing
in the cooking arena,

and he really doesn't.

Don't you have
to flip the rims?

This did not mention that,
so I will search that.

Because if we don't know
something, just look it up.

The lack of
expertise is alarming.

So, yes, I am terrified that
Craig's in charge of anything.

[laughs]

- How's it going?
- Good.

It's just windy.

- Hi, Craigy.
- What's up?

- Hey, Craig.
- Hey, Marcie.

- Hey.
- Are you ready to go?

Do you want me
to get you a drink?

Maybe in a little bit.

Well, that's----ing
cozy in there, huh?

I don't know.
You made the guest list.

- God, this is so--
- Oh, wow.

Beautimous.

Let's go get a
drink and chat.

I would love that.

I was literally
gonna come upstairs.

I was like, is Olivia here yet?
- Hi, lovebirds.

Hi.
- Is she here yet?

Is this nice?

Oh, we are eating outside.

Wait, that looks so pretty.

Wait, this is
actually really cute.

You want to go sit there?
- OK.

You can't let the
oil get to 400 degrees

because it'll ignite.

[laughs] OK,
but it only goes to 200.

Oh, OK. OK.

Here, I'll bartend.

Yeah, please,
will you actually?

I mean, yeah.

I'm, like, the worst
bartender you'll ever have.

Yeah.

What would you like?

OK,
I guess I'll do vodka.

OK, vodka what?

You just make it.
I don't know.

Oh, sh--.
OK.

- Yeah, pressure's on.
- Uh--

So are you
having a good time?

The full group
for me is a lot.

- Yeah.
- Also, Naomie--

she's not fooling anyone here.
- No. Yeah.

Like, her walking
in today and being

like, oh my god, how are you,
like, you look so pretty--

I was just like, hey.

Like, girl, we're not friends.

Yeah,
we're clearly not friends.

I know what you're doing.
- You're trying to get

my boyfriend, like I don't
[BLEEP] with you.

- Oh my god.
- If I was around my friends

right now, I would have
already popped off.

Yes.

- Coming up...
- Uh-oh.

Uh-oh.
Oh, no!

Yo!

My aunt's fence!

Classic Austen.

Austen, I think I got it.

They'll never--
they'll never notice.

Oh, my gosh.

[upbeat music]

OK, everyone just relax.
Shep, get behind the shield.

Oh, sh--.

Yeah, yeah, yeah!

Oh, hell no.

Yeah, buddy.

Craig, you're so good.

Oh, something was on fire.

Oh. Oh my god. Ah!

Oh, no.

Jesus Christ.

How are you and Paige?

I definitely picked up,
like, weird energy from--

from Paige.

- So did y'all-- today?
- Yeah.

It's awkward.
And, like, we're--

when I got here today,
like he was in the kitchen.

And I went to go say hello
but he, like, turned his back.

So it's just weird.

It's so weird.

I'm just not here for,
like, the fake nice.

Like, you look so pretty.
[BLEEP] off.

Yeah.

As a girl, she does
some shady-ass sh--.

Thank god you see it.
Oh my god.

So when we were at
Patricia's for the dog wedding,

she pulled him aside.

It's like you feel awkward
around me a little bit.

If you're trying
to insinuate that I

act differently around you--
- I am not.

When my girlfriend's
here than when I'm not--

No, that's not
what I'm saying.

OK, but that's
what it sounded like.

That is one of the most
inappropriate things ever.

There really are
no feelings between--

like, there's nothing there.

So I don't really
know what to do

because I feel like things have
been misconstrued to her and--

Well, there's definitely miscommunication.

She's so, like,
shameless though.

Like, if that was me,
I would be walking in here

with big egg on my face.

And I would be
really embarrassed.

Like, I wouldn't
just be walking

around like, hey, guys.

I would just never
have the balls to pull

someone's boyfriend aside.
I just wouldn't.

- Yeah.
- I'd be like, damn,

I'll send a secret text
like a normal person.

Yeah.
[laughter]

I think Naomie just liked
having Craig want her back.

If this tree pokes me in the
head one more----ing time--

Stop trying to
insert yourself

in someone's happiness just
because you want attention.

It's so annoying.

That's, yet again, another
reason why I think she's

a petty little bitch.

I have never said
anything to her.

I have acted like
a goddamn peach.

But, like, if she was
like, Craig, let's like,

talk about this, I'd be
like, bitch, it's enough.

I love that.
Oh my god.

I'm so excited.

I actually feel like you
and Craig are kind of, like,

perfect for each other.
- Oh, thank you.

As long as you don't try
and get coffee with him,

then we're cool.

[laughs] Oh my god.
Yeah, no.

Baby, we're looking good.

Onions are good if
you want to try them.

OK.
We're coming.

Shep.

Uh-oh.
Uh-oh.

Oh, no-- yo!

My aunt's fence!

The first throw!

Classic Austen.

Austen, I think I got it.

They'll never--
they'll never notice.

Like, what the hell?

Oh, my gosh.

Craig, how's it coming?

What's our total
right now, baby?

This whole baby thing--
you say baby so much.

- Recently, yeah.
- Sorry. He's in love.

[laughter]
46:30.

46 minutes.

All right, let's take a look.

OK, kid.

Ha ha.
What do you think?

Oh my god.

Wow, that looks so good.

That's----ing
fried turkey, my dude.

Wow.
- That was a bad one.

- The exact same thing.
- I know.

What are you talking about?
It was a good one.

All right.

It was a good one.

All right, Shep, you ready?

Taylor, don't drop it.

Don't even look.

[laughs]

Well, do we have a hot pad?

Here.
Do you want to do this?

- Good thing it's granite.
- I think, no, that's fine.

Come on.
Let's make a drink.

OK. Hi.

- Hey!
- Did you miss me?

- Yes. Where have you been?
- I'm glad, though.

I didn't want to take your
focus off of the bird.

Is turkey ready?

Oh, sh--! Yay!

- Look, turkey time.
- OK.

So we need to warm
everything up.

That looks really good.

OK, so maybe now we can

turn the oven on
and brown the--

- Yes.
- Yeah, brown the marshmallow.

What's that?

Oh, kidding?
I made a punch.

Oh, you should try it.
- That's OK. Thank you.

You're just going to
drink a Truly and bounce?

- Do you have a better idea?
- Yeah.

Let's go jump in the
ocean and frolic together.

Listen, give it time,
I'm probably going to want to.

- Good.
- Actually, there's probably

not going to be drama today.

Right?
- I don't know.

[whispering]
I think-- I think Naomie--

Yeah.

There's a massive
disconnect there.

But that's the word to use.

- It's a disconnect.
- That's the word to use.

So-- because yeah.

Should we take the
plates in for everyone?

Yeah. Yeah,
we'll take them all in.

- OK.
- Hear ye, hear ye--

I'm getting plates.

Katie, I'm sitting
next to you.

- Yes!
- So I can get all the

embarrassing
stories about Austen.

- Great.
- [laughs]

Let's go eat.

[upbeat music]

I'm scared of Craig
at this very moment.

Let's eat, man.

Try that.

That's----ing
really good, dude.

- Isn't it?
- That is so good.

Isn't it?

Yeah.

Good job, man.
- Let's go!

Let's go!
- Wow.

All right.

- You did a great job.
- Thank you.

- I'm shocked.
- What is this, exactly?

This is a squash casserole,
broccoli casserole.

This is stuffing.

Hey, these need
to go on the table.

They're twist off,
so it's easy.

♪

Hey, guys, this
is what a-- this

is what a plate looks like.

Guys, we did good.
We did good.

♪

Let's go.
Katie, come on.

You have a giant plate
of, like, mashed potatoes.

I didn't get any.
- Damn sunset.

God is just showing off
again tonight.

How perfect.

- Shep, who's here?
- I'm here.

I don't know anybody--
- Who's here?

- No idea.
- Olivia, do you want to

sit across?
- Yeah.

You sit next to Austen
and I'll sit here.

- OK.
- Come over here, Naomie.

Taylor, you sit here.

- Where's Kathryn?
- Kathryn!

- Someone call Kathryn.
- Call her.

It's me.
I'm here.

Kathryn, right here.

Cheers.

I've got to get
a drink, y'all.

Wait on me.
Hold on.

I'll be right back.
- OK, OK.

I just want to say--

- OK.
- Go ahead.

We're not done yet.
- The host, the host.

I literally just want to say
things that I'm thankful for.

Katie-- that Katie's in town--

I love that you
came to town early.

I love you to death, Katie.

And everyone here does, too.

I adore everyone at
this table, I really do.

This is why I wanted
all of you to be here.

And--
- So you like me?

[laughter]

Craig and I have a very on
and off again relationship.

Paige, you're not the
only one dating Craig.

I just want you--
- Fully aware of that.

- She's fully aware.
- I am fully aware of that.

But I just really appreciate
each and every one of you,

and that's it.

- Cheers, babe.

- Cheers.
- Here, here.

Happy Thanksgiving.

Happy
Thanksgiving!

Happy Thanksgiving.

- Cheers.
- Cheers.

Cheers.
- So good.

- This food is incredible.
- Taylor,

the broccoli casserole--
- Yum.

Is it good?

So cheesy.

No, I'm excited to
try these meatballs.

Ooh, that is moist AF, Craig.

- Yes.
- Well done.

That casserole
is really good.

Yes, John!

- So good.
- John.

Thanksgiving is
my favorite holiday.

Everybody smile!

Oh, wait.

I'm way too close.

So Friendsgiving
just makes me happy.

No, Taylor, you're in it.

[laughs] Oh, really?

- Taylor!
- I'm sorry.

And let's be honest here.

I think that this group
could use a nice meal

to bring us together--

It's just, like,
it's just too pretty.

- Kathryn got a drumstick.
- Yeah, awesome.

You'd wait a
lifetime to have it.

Hey, it was special when you
got the drumstick at the fair.

Yeah.
[laughs]

And remind us that
we're all thankful for each

other and we don't
always have to yell

and bitch at each other.
- Wait.

I want a picture.

This way, Craig.
Smile!

Love.
Love.

Is this bitch for real?

[music winds down]

Coming up...

I feel like you're sort
of coming at me and like--

You pulled me aside.
I'm not coming at you.

No, no, no.
I did pull you aside.

I'll call it out.

Do you have feelings
for Craig still?

Let's all take
Christmas card photos

with the same backdrop.

Can someone take
a picture of me?

- Just us two.
- Sideways.

- Yeah, for Mom.
- Yeah, for Mom.

Babe, OK, don't do side--
do up and down and sideways.

Ooh.
You look so cute.

Oh, look at the
cultural appropriation

at the other end of the table.

What do you mean?
What's happening?

I love. I love.
I love. I love.

Oh, we got to get the sunset
'cause it's a couples photo.

Hey, right here.
Right here.

I need you right here.

Guys, it's a great way to
get canceled but, you know,

do your thing.
- Why are we getting cancelled?

Like, Jesus Christ,
I'd really

not post that anywhere, guys.
- Why?

- We won't.
- What is happening?

I don't know.

What are you talking about?

Because of our thing,
our pilgrim?

You look like a pilgrim. Yeah.

Oh my god.
How can Naomie be so stupid?

OK.
OK.

Enough.
Enough.

He's not actually
upset about that.

He's upset about something
else and he's just, like,

blaming it on the pilgrims.

This is insane.

Can someone explain
why that's controversial?

- There-- there is no reason.
- [laughs]

It's just--

I thought it was
"Handmaid's Tale."

I don't think
it's the pilgrims.

I think it's just me,
like, being around

that bothers Craig.

- Let's go get banana pudding.
- Are you serious?

Banana pudding makes
everybody better.

[overlapping chatter]
...inside, banana pudding.

Yeah.
Let's just do dessert.

Will you take
this of Craig and I?

- Yes, I will.
- Come on, baby.

Like, right there because
the black will be subtle.

Yeah, that's good.

He was upset because we had
handkerchiefs on our head?

It was about that it
looked like settlers.

It had to do with my ears
being----ing cold,

is what it had to do with.

My ears were cold, so I
put the thing on my head

'cause I didn't have a hat.
- It's ridiculous.

It's ridiculous.

Oh, it's cold as sh--.

- It is getting chilly.
- Are you guys cold?

- It's cold.
- Freezing.

- A little bit. It's cold.
- [shivers]

- No, I mean, more than--
- We sat out there too long.

I made this
pudding all myself.

Get in there, 'cause
there's some on the bottom.

- I'm getting in there.
- Oh, you are?

- I don't know what that is.
- Ugh.

Paige, like, she hates me or
something or is mad at me.

And I was like, why?
Like, it's terrible.

Like-- but whatever, like, I
should have known, I guess.

That doesn't
make sense to me.

But, like,
I got to just, like,

nip it in the bud
because I'm, like, this

is so----ing stupid, like--

OK.
I'm just gonna go do it.

OK.

The banana pudding
makes everyone nuts.

It makes everybody bananas.

[light laughter]

Hi.

Paige, do you want to
talk outside for a second?

- Yeah.
- Perfect.

I don't know what--

what we could have to talk
about, but I would love to.

- Cannot imagine possibly.
- Yeah.

My crazy [BLEEP]
ex-girlfriend wants to come

have a conversation with her?

- Don't say crazy--
- Leva, stop.

Ex-girlfriend.
That's a little severe.

Don't get involved
in my sh--.

I'm not.

I was just trying to look
out and just be like,

just choose different words.

She's already
pulled me aside.

Now she's pulling
my girlfriend away.

Like, ex-girlfriends
from years ago

don't make drama with
their ex's new girlfriend.

She's just not firing
on all cylinders.

So I wanted to talk to you
because I feel like clearly

there's a disconnect if, like,
you're feeling uncomfortable

and stuff.

Um--

[suspenseful music]

Look.

When I meet someone for the
first time, I like them.

I have no reason
not to like them.

But at Patricia's, you pulling
him aside and saying, hey,

I'm not gonna come
around anymore

if it makes you uncomfortable...

insinuates
that there's feelings there.

- That's not at all how I--
- OK.

- Would have meant that--
- OK.

Like, whatsoever.

OK.

So then do you feel,
like, when Craig

is around, that he treats you
differently 'cause I'm there?

- Yeah.
- OK.

So that also insinuates
that you guys have

some type of relationship.

But there is no relationship.

Like, I feel like you're sort
of coming at me and like--

You pulled me aside.
I'm not coming at you.

No, no, no.
I did pull you aside, but--

Look, if I was coming at you,

you would
absolutely know it.

I mean, I'll call it out.

Do you have feelings
for Craig still?

No.
No, no, no.

- OK.
- No, no, no.

- OK.
- Like, not at all.

But I just want to let
you know, like, the optics

of it, it looks like you do.

I mean, this is
for sure pointless.

I understand why,
in Paige's mind,

Craig is like this
shining prince.

But this whole
thing is bullsh--.

I don't know you very well.

And I can say that when
I met you I liked you.

But also I've dealt with girls
my whole life and they flip.

And you guys dated
four years ago.

So you have a past,
and I know that you

guys hooked up this summer.

And I know there
was a past there.

So it's not crazy for me to
think that you might still

have feelings for him and that
what happened at Patricia's

is what I thought.

Yeah.

So by you saying like, hey,
I won't come around the group

anymore if that makes
you uncomfortable,

what did you mean by that?

I meant, like, if
there's an event and you--

and Paige is uncomfortable--
it was really more for you.

So then you should
have just came up to me.

I thought you and I were cool.
- We-- we were.

So, like, if you thought
I felt uncomfortable,

that is news to me.

So if you actually had come
up to me and said that,

I would have----ing got it.

Yeah.

And, look, you are my
boyfriend's ex-girlfriend.

We were never gonna
be best friends.

It's not like we were gonna
call each other and be like,

let's get coffee.

But I wanted to be able to be
with you in settings like this

and be like,
where'd you get those pants?

Like, it's just not my
personality to hold grudges.

We had an issue.

We're----ing good.
- Yeah.

Let's be cool.

Like, I think you're pretty,
and I think you're funny,

and I want to, like,
borrow your clothes

and, like, let's do it.

And, by the way, I think
you are such a badass.

Thank you.
You have great taste in people.

[laughter]

On the next episode
of "Southern Charm"...

Breathe.
Push.

- Anything?
- I don't know.

Let's get some castor oil.

- Hi!
- Hey!

Hi!

You guys are far
closer than you think.

I've heard.

Well, cheers to never
been hooked up with Whitney.

[light laughter]

You look so handsome.

Everyone looks so nice.

That was super elegant.

- Craig!
- Oh my god.

Oh, Craig!

Oh my god.

Craig, that chair. Craig.

Craig, your zipper
is all the way down.

It's broken.

There was an issue that
happened with me and Venita.

I text Venita that Madison
is, like, acting dumb.

And she saw Venita's phone.

Okay, hold on. Pause.

Oh my god.

For her, you got to
get to your settings

and say hide my profile.

I'm not gonna do that.
[dramatic chords]