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1
00:00:04,023 --> 00:00:06,398
Check me out!
2
00:00:07,248 --> 00:00:09,131
The new uniforms just came in.
3
00:00:09,305 --> 00:00:11,697
Alan made me join the team to work out,
4
00:00:11,703 --> 00:00:13,883
but I am working it.
5
00:00:15,423 --> 00:00:18,686
I still can't believe you're
playing on a softball team.
6
00:00:18,692 --> 00:00:21,136
Don't you play with enough
soft white balls at home?
7
00:00:23,423 --> 00:00:25,956
A, never.
8
00:00:27,151 --> 00:00:29,135
B, we're not playing this afternoon.
9
00:00:29,141 --> 00:00:31,238
We're a man short.
Josh was gonna fill in,
10
00:00:31,244 --> 00:00:33,213
but stupid Gabi took
Josh and his dad out
11
00:00:33,219 --> 00:00:35,832
for a picnic to apologize for
running over his dad's feet.
12
00:00:35,838 --> 00:00:37,770
Do you realize how selfish you sound?
13
00:00:37,776 --> 00:00:40,866
This is the first time Josh
is spending time with his dad.
14
00:00:40,872 --> 00:00:42,961
I'm selfish? What about Josh?
15
00:00:42,967 --> 00:00:44,584
Josh promised to play in my game
16
00:00:44,590 --> 00:00:47,444
and abandoned me to
spend time with his dad.
17
00:00:47,538 --> 00:00:49,488
Like father like son.
18
00:00:49,764 --> 00:00:52,598
Wait, wait, wait, wait. How
was Josh gonna play anyway?
19
00:00:52,604 --> 00:00:54,000
Isn't it a gay league?
20
00:00:54,006 --> 00:00:56,476
Yeah, but you don't
have to be gay to play.
21
00:00:56,482 --> 00:00:58,491
We have a don't ask, don't tell policy.
22
00:00:59,476 --> 00:01:02,071
Hey, you look like a barrel-chested
23
00:01:02,077 --> 00:01:04,077
aging athlete. Can you play?
24
00:01:05,408 --> 00:01:07,797
A, thank you.
25
00:01:09,000 --> 00:01:10,905
B, I can't.
26
00:01:11,015 --> 00:01:14,500
I gotta sell Squirrel Ranger
cookies with my group from church,
27
00:01:14,695 --> 00:01:17,963
but if you buy 20 boxes, we can talk.
28
00:01:18,429 --> 00:01:20,477
Done. I'll get you a uniform.
29
00:01:20,625 --> 00:01:23,240
How many "X"s are there
in front of you "L"?
30
00:01:26,844 --> 00:01:29,539
I can't believe this. I can't
believe you are actually mad at me.
31
00:01:29,545 --> 00:01:32,311
- I am speechless!
- Well, that's a first.
32
00:01:32,974 --> 00:01:35,489
I had one chance to bond with
my father and you ruined it.
33
00:01:35,495 --> 00:01:36,894
You didn't stop talking
the entire picnic.
34
00:01:36,900 --> 00:01:38,848
Yeah, I only talked because
I was trying to protect you
35
00:01:38,854 --> 00:01:40,743
from sounding so show-offy.
36
00:01:40,749 --> 00:01:42,907
(scoffing laughs) Show-offy.
37
00:01:43,589 --> 00:01:45,255
How was I show-offy?
38
00:01:45,261 --> 00:01:47,480
How? Oh, okay, let me see. Uh...
39
00:01:47,486 --> 00:01:49,371
blah, blah, blah, my helicopter.
40
00:01:49,377 --> 00:01:50,933
Blah, blah, blah, my vineyard.
41
00:01:50,939 --> 00:01:53,186
Blah, blah, my
helicopter to my vineyard.
42
00:01:53,941 --> 00:01:56,475
We get it. You're rich.
43
00:01:56,481 --> 00:01:58,654
Well, excuse me for trying
to make my dad proud.
44
00:01:58,660 --> 00:02:02,323
Stop it! Now, you two need
to focus on what's important.
45
00:02:02,949 --> 00:02:05,758
It's Squirrel Ranger cookie season!
46
00:02:06,734 --> 00:02:10,576
All right, who wants in? I got
Coco-nutties and Little Diddles.
47
00:02:11,656 --> 00:02:14,454
- What is going on out here?
- I'll tell you what's going on.
48
00:02:14,460 --> 00:02:15,875
Thanks to her incessant yammering,
49
00:02:15,881 --> 00:02:17,568
my dad had a crappy time at the picnic.
50
00:02:17,574 --> 00:02:19,765
He conveniently remembered
he had a business meeting
51
00:02:19,771 --> 00:02:21,111
and he had to leave town early.
52
00:02:21,507 --> 00:02:23,227
Yay!
53
00:02:23,382 --> 00:02:25,804
Now you can play in my game.
54
00:02:25,810 --> 00:02:27,294
Was that selfish? I don't care.
55
00:02:27,300 --> 00:02:30,300
- Yay!
- (theme music playing)
56
00:02:34,750 --> 00:02:36,896
She's in the spotlight
57
00:02:36,902 --> 00:02:38,605
And she turned my head
58
00:02:38,611 --> 00:02:40,664
She'd run a red light
59
00:02:40,670 --> 00:02:42,474
'Cause she's bad like that
60
00:02:42,480 --> 00:02:46,250
I like that ooh,
baby, ooh, baby, baby
61
00:02:46,256 --> 00:02:49,586
-
I like that ooh, baby ooh, baby
- Sync/Corrections PetaG - addic7ed.com
62
00:02:51,283 --> 00:02:53,711
You know, you try to be a good person...
63
00:02:53,717 --> 00:02:55,334
you try to bring a
father and son together
64
00:02:55,340 --> 00:02:57,168
and then the whole thing
blows up in your face
65
00:02:57,174 --> 00:02:58,401
and you get blamed for it.
66
00:02:58,407 --> 00:03:00,128
So you're done butting in?
67
00:03:00,134 --> 00:03:01,385
Yes, I am.
68
00:03:01,391 --> 00:03:04,099
Right after I trick Josh's
dad into staying in town
69
00:03:04,105 --> 00:03:05,972
and then take him to
Josh's softball game.
70
00:03:06,878 --> 00:03:09,273
We're gonna watch the game.
We'll go out for drinks after,
71
00:03:09,287 --> 00:03:10,544
and then I'll sneak out the back and
72
00:03:10,550 --> 00:03:11,984
let them have their father-son moment.
73
00:03:12,190 --> 00:03:13,606
Sounds like a good idea.
74
00:03:14,675 --> 00:03:15,939
What?
75
00:03:16,317 --> 00:03:18,130
Well, obviously the
picnic didn't go well
76
00:03:18,136 --> 00:03:19,419
so you want to give Josh and his dad
77
00:03:19,425 --> 00:03:21,485
a chance to try again.
I think it's a good move.
78
00:03:21,491 --> 00:03:22,718
W... wait a minute.
79
00:03:22,724 --> 00:03:25,030
You are never on board
with my plans, which
80
00:03:25,036 --> 00:03:26,356
makes me feel like I shouldn't do it.
81
00:03:26,362 --> 00:03:27,983
So I'm not gonna do
it. I'm staying home.
82
00:03:29,419 --> 00:03:31,399
Okay, whatever you think is best.
83
00:03:31,716 --> 00:03:34,012
Whatever I think is... Oh, no, uh-huh.
84
00:03:34,380 --> 00:03:37,233
I'm on to you, Sofia. You're just
using reverse psychology on me
85
00:03:37,239 --> 00:03:40,067
so I'm gonna use reverse,
reverse psychology on you,
86
00:03:40,073 --> 00:03:42,464
which means I am going
to pick up Josh's dad.
87
00:03:42,470 --> 00:03:45,269
Or should I say I'm not
not going to pick him up?
88
00:03:46,493 --> 00:03:48,484
- I said it was a good...
- Oh my God, shut up!
89
00:03:48,490 --> 00:03:49,899
I am sick of your negativity!
90
00:03:51,789 --> 00:03:55,033
Can I interest you in some
Squirrel Ranger cookies?
91
00:03:55,039 --> 00:03:56,453
Nope, I'm good, er,
92
00:03:56,459 --> 00:03:58,626
but if you ask Sofia, she'll
say she doesn't want any,
93
00:03:58,632 --> 00:03:59,850
which means she does.
94
00:04:01,033 --> 00:04:03,528
Ooh, you got any snickerdoodles?
95
00:04:03,534 --> 00:04:06,517
Snicker, please. You know I do.
96
00:04:06,523 --> 00:04:08,381
Ooh! All right.
97
00:04:08,496 --> 00:04:11,012
Since when are you a pack
leader for the Squirrel Rangers?
98
00:04:11,033 --> 00:04:13,323
Uh, since I found out
that the pack leader
99
00:04:13,329 --> 00:04:17,071
who sells the most cookies
wins a cruise to Bora Bora.
100
00:04:17,077 --> 00:04:19,604
Wow, what do the girls get?
101
00:04:19,986 --> 00:04:21,205
Who cares?
102
00:04:21,777 --> 00:04:23,707
I'll be on my cruise,
103
00:04:23,713 --> 00:04:26,803
but not if I don't sell 800
more boxes by this weekend.
104
00:04:27,364 --> 00:04:29,318
Too bad I'm not in your group.
105
00:04:29,886 --> 00:04:31,683
You were a Squirrel Ranger?
106
00:04:31,988 --> 00:04:34,783
Oh, I wasn't "a" Squirrel Ranger.
107
00:04:34,789 --> 00:04:37,343
I was the best Squirrel
Ranger in all of Miami.
108
00:04:38,436 --> 00:04:40,452
And if a girl tried to
sell cookies on my turf,
109
00:04:40,458 --> 00:04:42,778
Lil' So-So would go Scarface on her ass.
110
00:04:44,460 --> 00:04:46,622
I was the cookie kingpin, chica.
111
00:04:48,673 --> 00:04:50,785
- Really?
- Oh, yeah.
112
00:04:50,791 --> 00:04:53,313
When you're nine, cute, and me,
113
00:04:53,319 --> 00:04:55,501
you can sell anything to anybody.
114
00:04:55,507 --> 00:04:57,645
Mm-hmm.
115
00:05:01,796 --> 00:05:04,023
You have any interest
in going to Bora Bora?
116
00:05:04,625 --> 00:05:06,625
Hell, yeah, I do.
117
00:05:14,524 --> 00:05:17,524
(crowd cheers, applauds)
118
00:05:18,697 --> 00:05:20,783
Okay, here we are.
119
00:05:20,798 --> 00:05:23,765
Nothing better for a
father-son bonding softball game
120
00:05:23,771 --> 00:05:25,571
than an ice cold beer in a
121
00:05:25,577 --> 00:05:27,337
carefully concealed sippy cup.
122
00:05:28,642 --> 00:05:31,177
Bases aren't the only thing
that are about to get loaded.
123
00:05:31,782 --> 00:05:34,370
I just don't get why Josh wanted
me to come to his softball game?
124
00:05:34,376 --> 00:05:35,666
All he talked about at the picnic
125
00:05:35,672 --> 00:05:37,341
was how great he's
done in life without me.
126
00:05:37,347 --> 00:05:39,895
Clearly, he's trying
to send me a message.
127
00:05:39,901 --> 00:05:41,331
That's why I left early.
128
00:05:41,337 --> 00:05:42,954
(scoffs) I knew it wasn't me.
129
00:05:43,900 --> 00:05:45,416
Look, Gabi, I'm just gonna say it.
130
00:05:45,422 --> 00:05:47,736
I keep having this feeling that
Josh knows nothing about this
131
00:05:47,742 --> 00:05:50,742
- and bringing me here was your idea.
- W... what?
132
00:05:50,748 --> 00:05:53,452
You think I would risk
my relationship with Josh
133
00:05:53,458 --> 00:05:57,423
by interfering in this very
fragile father-son relationship?
134
00:05:57,429 --> 00:05:59,866
Well, you did it before when
you picked me up at the airport.
135
00:06:00,171 --> 00:06:03,288
Exactly, yes. So what, you think
I'd do it again? What am I? A fool?
136
00:06:04,358 --> 00:06:06,962
Matt, Josh felt so bad
about what happened before
137
00:06:06,968 --> 00:06:08,764
and he wanted a second
chance to connect with you.
138
00:06:08,770 --> 00:06:10,262
So that's why he brought you here. He...
139
00:06:10,268 --> 00:06:12,271
he wanted you to see the real him.
140
00:06:13,688 --> 00:06:16,858
Okay, maybe this was a good idea.
141
00:06:16,864 --> 00:06:18,182
Thank you.
142
00:06:18,965 --> 00:06:20,933
I mean, you know, thank Josh
143
00:06:20,939 --> 00:06:23,313
'cause he's the one who came up with it.
144
00:06:25,196 --> 00:06:26,890
Josh, you're up.
145
00:06:29,017 --> 00:06:31,304
- Oh, stop, quick, turn around.
- Why?
146
00:06:31,912 --> 00:06:33,446
Just 'cause.
147
00:06:36,983 --> 00:06:38,495
Looking good.
148
00:06:39,217 --> 00:06:40,633
Why, thank you.
149
00:06:40,639 --> 00:06:43,927
I had the jersey tapered
to accentuate my "V."
150
00:06:44,208 --> 00:06:46,029
No, nobody wanna see your "V!"
151
00:06:48,708 --> 00:06:50,122
Good luck, new guy.
152
00:06:50,341 --> 00:06:51,552
I don't need luck.
153
00:06:51,607 --> 00:06:54,090
I'm gonna drive this so deep.
154
00:06:54,183 --> 00:06:55,814
(chuckles) From your lips.
155
00:06:56,682 --> 00:06:58,121
All right, play ball.
156
00:07:04,302 --> 00:07:07,370
(cheering)
157
00:07:11,142 --> 00:07:12,596
This is amazing.
158
00:07:12,602 --> 00:07:14,051
I know.
159
00:07:14,495 --> 00:07:17,493
It's all so clear now. Now I know
why Josh wanted me to be here.
160
00:07:17,499 --> 00:07:19,297
It's like you said. He wanted me to see
161
00:07:19,303 --> 00:07:21,281
- the real him.
- Yes!
162
00:07:21,594 --> 00:07:23,797
- I am so proud of him.
- Yes!
163
00:07:23,803 --> 00:07:27,937
- He was afraid to tell me he was gay.
- Yes! Yes!
164
00:07:28,984 --> 00:07:30,405
Wait, what?
165
00:07:32,753 --> 00:07:34,495
All right, that's
enough of the butt slaps.
166
00:07:34,501 --> 00:07:35,701
Sorry, boss.
167
00:07:36,753 --> 00:07:38,630
(chanting) Josh! Josh! Josh! Josh!
168
00:07:38,636 --> 00:07:40,328
Josh! Josh! Josh! Josh!
169
00:07:40,334 --> 00:07:42,486
Josh! Josh! Josh! Josh! Josh!
170
00:07:42,492 --> 00:07:44,060
Josh, Josh, Josh!
171
00:07:44,273 --> 00:07:45,781
Hey, I need to talk to you.
172
00:07:45,787 --> 00:07:47,570
- Gabi, what are you doing here?
- Well, before I answer that,
173
00:07:47,576 --> 00:07:50,791
I need you to know I only did
it because I care about you.
174
00:07:51,747 --> 00:07:53,144
What did you do?
175
00:07:53,150 --> 00:07:54,855
Well, I felt really
bad about the picnic,
176
00:07:54,861 --> 00:07:56,929
- so I stopped your dad from leaving...
- What?
177
00:07:56,935 --> 00:07:58,275
- and then I brought him here.
- What?
178
00:07:58,281 --> 00:07:59,730
Will you stop interrupting me?
179
00:07:59,736 --> 00:08:01,269
When you hit that homer, your dad...
180
00:08:01,275 --> 00:08:03,027
- Josh!
- Damn it.
181
00:08:04,020 --> 00:08:05,770
I'm so proud of you.
182
00:08:06,379 --> 00:08:07,579
You are?
183
00:08:08,043 --> 00:08:10,082
Josh, Josh, Josh...
184
00:08:10,088 --> 00:08:11,778
Not now, Gabi. My dad's proud of me.
185
00:08:12,051 --> 00:08:13,254
You were saying, Matt?
186
00:08:13,260 --> 00:08:14,537
Seeing you out here today, buddy, I...
187
00:08:14,543 --> 00:08:16,864
w-what can I say? I'm blown away.
188
00:08:17,051 --> 00:08:19,021
Oh, it's nothin' really.
189
00:08:19,027 --> 00:08:20,823
Been hitting dingers
since seventh grade.
190
00:08:21,917 --> 00:08:23,297
I want you to know, pal,
191
00:08:23,887 --> 00:08:25,821
you are so darn courageous.
192
00:08:25,986 --> 00:08:27,186
(sighs)
193
00:08:27,192 --> 00:08:29,008
Bring it in. Oh!
194
00:08:29,014 --> 00:08:30,214
(whimpers)
195
00:08:30,220 --> 00:08:32,443
We got so much to talk about.
I'm gonna call my office
196
00:08:32,449 --> 00:08:33,752
and cancel all my meetings
197
00:08:33,758 --> 00:08:35,916
because I want to hang out with my son
198
00:08:35,922 --> 00:08:37,643
and hear his whole story.
199
00:08:41,100 --> 00:08:42,640
My dad's proud of me.
200
00:08:44,717 --> 00:08:46,913
All it took was a home
run, Gabi. Who knew?
201
00:08:46,919 --> 00:08:49,140
- Huh.
- Thank you for bringing him.
202
00:08:49,688 --> 00:08:51,112
Yeah.
203
00:08:51,941 --> 00:08:53,676
Your dad thinks your gay.
204
00:08:55,465 --> 00:08:56,668
What?
205
00:08:58,387 --> 00:08:59,941
Why does my dad think I'm gay?
206
00:08:59,947 --> 00:09:01,763
Well, the whole crowd is,
207
00:09:01,769 --> 00:09:05,473
and the teams are the San Fransisco
Bears versus the Field of Queens.
208
00:09:05,479 --> 00:09:06,687
So...
209
00:09:07,413 --> 00:09:09,462
Naturally, he just
kind of assumed you were
210
00:09:09,468 --> 00:09:11,931
and then I agreed with him and
didn't tell him you weren't.
211
00:09:11,937 --> 00:09:13,632
What? Why would you do that?
212
00:09:13,638 --> 00:09:15,439
'Cause I knew how much you
wanted to connect with him
213
00:09:15,445 --> 00:09:17,115
and then he finally
felt connected to you,
214
00:09:17,121 --> 00:09:18,835
and I didn't... I didn't
wanna ruin that. I mean,
215
00:09:18,841 --> 00:09:20,880
- what was I supposed to do?
- Well, not say that.
216
00:09:20,886 --> 00:09:22,171
Now you've made things
more uncomfortable
217
00:09:22,177 --> 00:09:24,361
between me and him because now
I got to tell him the truth.
218
00:09:24,567 --> 00:09:26,388
- Do you?
- Josh.
219
00:09:26,952 --> 00:09:28,286
I changed my flight.
220
00:09:28,340 --> 00:09:29,906
Now that this wall is down between us,
221
00:09:29,912 --> 00:09:31,253
I can't wait to spend time with you,
222
00:09:31,259 --> 00:09:34,386
so I got us two tickets to Wicked.
223
00:09:35,964 --> 00:09:37,990
Look, Matt, I got to be honest with ya.
224
00:09:40,924 --> 00:09:42,713
Wicked's my favorite musical.
225
00:09:43,630 --> 00:09:45,854
- Good.
- Yeah, so good.
226
00:09:51,169 --> 00:09:53,877
Oh, my damn, Sofia, you look amazing.
227
00:09:53,995 --> 00:09:57,005
I look exactly like
I did when I was nine.
228
00:09:57,958 --> 00:09:59,673
Told you I was cute.
229
00:10:01,497 --> 00:10:04,876
It's time to turn that cute into loot.
230
00:10:09,005 --> 00:10:12,210
Hey, buddy, looks like
you got the munchies.
231
00:10:12,216 --> 00:10:14,560
You buy ten boxes, you get one free.
232
00:10:20,712 --> 00:10:24,364
And if I sell enough cookies,
I win a trip to science camp.
233
00:10:25,256 --> 00:10:26,467
Bible camp?
234
00:10:26,560 --> 00:10:27,880
Torah camp.
235
00:10:30,351 --> 00:10:31,634
Shalom.
236
00:10:32,750 --> 00:10:35,466
Hey, buddy, who's never seen me before,
237
00:10:36,038 --> 00:10:37,757
you look like you have the munchies.
238
00:10:37,763 --> 00:10:39,947
You buy ten boxes, you get one free.
239
00:10:47,527 --> 00:10:49,433
Now go find your mama's purse
240
00:10:49,439 --> 00:10:52,539
and bring Lil' So-So some crisp hundies.
241
00:10:52,917 --> 00:10:54,333
Comprende?
242
00:10:56,309 --> 00:10:58,826
Buy ten boxes, get one free.
243
00:11:01,440 --> 00:11:03,057
It's in your back pocket.
244
00:11:10,566 --> 00:11:12,141
Why are you still wearing that?
245
00:11:12,457 --> 00:11:14,355
I can't take it off.
246
00:11:14,361 --> 00:11:17,480
I walk down the street.
People point. People stare.
247
00:11:17,486 --> 00:11:18,737
It's like I'm a celebrity.
248
00:11:19,335 --> 00:11:21,765
People probably think you're
the Pillsbury Dough Girl.
249
00:11:22,844 --> 00:11:24,044
Hee-hee!
250
00:11:26,753 --> 00:11:31,014
The point is, people are
digging me and I am loving it.
251
00:11:31,020 --> 00:11:34,640
I'm never going to get it
dirty so I can wear it forever.
252
00:11:35,021 --> 00:11:36,743
Uh, what about when
you're playing softball?
253
00:11:36,749 --> 00:11:38,859
Oh, I never play.
254
00:11:38,865 --> 00:11:41,353
I sit on the bench and I look sexy,
255
00:11:41,359 --> 00:11:44,342
and when it gets close to my
turn, I got to the bathroom.
256
00:11:46,286 --> 00:11:47,584
- Oh!
- Oh.
257
00:11:47,590 --> 00:11:48,992
No!
258
00:11:48,998 --> 00:11:52,003
My softball costume!
259
00:11:52,009 --> 00:11:53,317
Oh.
260
00:11:53,381 --> 00:11:56,396
Come on, take it off. I got
some vodka in the laundry room.
261
00:11:56,402 --> 00:11:58,351
Does vodka get out stains?
262
00:11:58,357 --> 00:12:01,242
No, but I'm gonna need some if
ima see you without that shirt.
263
00:12:04,343 --> 00:12:05,543
Oh!
264
00:12:08,438 --> 00:12:10,620
Hey, guys, did you have fun at Wicked?
265
00:12:10,626 --> 00:12:12,003
Oh, you know it.
266
00:12:12,009 --> 00:12:15,509
That song "Defying
Gravity" defies gravity.
267
00:12:16,829 --> 00:12:18,511
It's sad you have to leave so soon.
268
00:12:18,517 --> 00:12:20,329
I know, but I'm gonna see
you on the Fourth of July.
269
00:12:20,335 --> 00:12:22,350
- Right, buddy?
- You bet. I'll bring the sparkles.
270
00:12:25,217 --> 00:12:27,819
I don't know how, but
that actually worked.
271
00:12:28,381 --> 00:12:31,033
I'm not gonna say you owe
your entire relationship
272
00:12:31,039 --> 00:12:33,462
with your father to
me, so you can say it.
273
00:12:33,720 --> 00:12:36,157
Gabi, you are a genius.
274
00:12:36,329 --> 00:12:37,854
You know, a week ago, I
didn't even know my dad,
275
00:12:37,860 --> 00:12:39,159
and now he's part of my life.
276
00:12:39,279 --> 00:12:42,399
I get to see him on the
fourth, Thanksgiving, Christmas.
277
00:12:42,405 --> 00:12:45,098
(clicks mouth) So you just
have to be holiday gay.
278
00:12:45,383 --> 00:12:46,810
Holli-gay, if you will.
279
00:12:49,151 --> 00:12:51,058
But, Gabi, I gotta be straight with you.
280
00:12:51,456 --> 00:12:53,747
- What's wrong?
- No, no. I gotta be straight with you.
281
00:12:53,753 --> 00:12:55,354
Take off our clothes.
I'm using the punch card.
282
00:12:55,823 --> 00:12:57,864
Welcome back, straight Josh.
283
00:12:58,223 --> 00:12:59,776
I'm sorry, I forgot my...
284
00:13:00,651 --> 00:13:02,550
Oh my God.
285
00:13:02,950 --> 00:13:06,168
Matt, it's not what it looks like.
286
00:13:06,532 --> 00:13:08,194
I can't believe it.
287
00:13:09,167 --> 00:13:10,761
Gabi's a man?
288
00:13:18,139 --> 00:13:20,834
- I am obviously not a man!
- Okay, I didn't know.
289
00:13:20,840 --> 00:13:24,002
I... I-I was trying to be
open-minded. I watch Transparent.
290
00:13:25,514 --> 00:13:27,850
You probably want to
know what's going on.
291
00:13:28,790 --> 00:13:29,990
Gabi?
292
00:13:31,463 --> 00:13:32,663
Josh?
293
00:13:33,748 --> 00:13:35,023
- Gabi!
- Josh.
294
00:13:35,029 --> 00:13:36,902
Will one of you please
tell me what's going on?
295
00:13:36,908 --> 00:13:40,610
Okay, look, Matt, I... I haven't
been completely honest with you.
296
00:13:41,210 --> 00:13:42,410
(sighs)
297
00:13:42,749 --> 00:13:43,960
(clears throat)
298
00:13:43,966 --> 00:13:45,983
I was... I was just so
happy that we were bonding,
299
00:13:45,989 --> 00:13:47,593
and I didn't want
anything to mess it up,
300
00:13:48,092 --> 00:13:49,886
but the truth is...
301
00:13:49,892 --> 00:13:51,571
(sighs deeply)
302
00:13:51,577 --> 00:13:52,893
I'm straight.
303
00:13:54,509 --> 00:13:55,709
What?
304
00:13:56,878 --> 00:13:59,062
Why would you lie to me?
305
00:14:00,349 --> 00:14:01,549
Gabi?
306
00:14:02,168 --> 00:14:05,113
Um, well. At first you
guys didn't connect,
307
00:14:05,119 --> 00:14:06,989
but w-when you found
out he was gay, you did.
308
00:14:06,995 --> 00:14:10,099
And so that made it incredibly
difficult for him to tell you
309
00:14:10,105 --> 00:14:12,665
that he is, in fact, an openly
straight heterosexual man.
310
00:14:13,558 --> 00:14:14,895
I can't believe this.
311
00:14:16,074 --> 00:14:17,777
Ah, d-do you know how hard it was
312
00:14:17,783 --> 00:14:19,574
for me to come out here and meet you?
313
00:14:19,870 --> 00:14:23,185
Uh, probably as hard as
it was for me to meet you.
314
00:14:23,191 --> 00:14:24,816
I come out here to get to know my son
315
00:14:24,822 --> 00:14:26,952
and you lie to me and
disrespect our relationship
316
00:14:26,958 --> 00:14:29,120
- like it means nothing.
- Whoa. Whoa, whoa, whoa.
317
00:14:29,636 --> 00:14:31,909
You want to talk about a
relationship that means nothing?
318
00:14:32,214 --> 00:14:33,831
How about you abandoning
me 30 years ago,
319
00:14:33,837 --> 00:14:35,309
and not once trying to contact me?
320
00:14:35,315 --> 00:14:36,730
- Josh.
- No, how about the fact that all of my
321
00:14:36,736 --> 00:14:38,611
other friends had dads and I didn't.
322
00:14:38,952 --> 00:14:41,359
You never taught me how to fish
or how to drive or how to...
323
00:14:41,365 --> 00:14:42,657
how to unhook bras.
324
00:14:44,343 --> 00:14:45,942
I don't think dads do that.
325
00:14:46,937 --> 00:14:49,254
Well, I wouldn't know
because I never had a dad.
326
00:14:49,913 --> 00:14:53,194
G... oh... God... I... I... I
think I'd just... I'd better leave.
327
00:14:53,200 --> 00:14:55,740
Of course you do because
that's what you do best, leave.
328
00:15:00,465 --> 00:15:02,121
Josh, I'm so sorry.
329
00:15:02,127 --> 00:15:03,902
- Do you want me to go talk to him?
- No, I don't want you to talk to him.
330
00:15:03,908 --> 00:15:06,266
I don't want you to talk to
me. J-j-just butt out, Gabi.
331
00:15:08,834 --> 00:15:10,366
I miss gay Josh.
332
00:15:21,538 --> 00:15:24,451
Baby, we did it. We won.
333
00:15:24,457 --> 00:15:25,665
Woo!
334
00:15:25,671 --> 00:15:27,748
Bora Bora, here we come.
335
00:15:27,754 --> 00:15:29,177
Ooh, yes.
336
00:15:29,183 --> 00:15:31,310
Sorry about the ceremony taking so long.
337
00:15:31,316 --> 00:15:33,953
All those Squirrel
Rangers speeches and songs,
338
00:15:33,959 --> 00:15:35,790
so Bora-boring.
339
00:15:36,094 --> 00:15:38,893
Ooh, I can't wait to have
a big old pi?a colada.
340
00:15:38,907 --> 00:15:41,843
I can't wait to have a
big ol' pi?a in Yolanda.
341
00:15:43,289 --> 00:15:44,615
I'm gonna get us some champagne.
342
00:15:44,621 --> 00:15:46,560
Oh, don't bother. I have
something stronger in my room.
343
00:15:46,622 --> 00:15:49,480
- (knocking)
- Ms. Perkins?
344
00:15:49,486 --> 00:15:52,890
Yolanda, you left the ceremony
without your cruise tickets.
345
00:15:52,896 --> 00:15:54,513
(laughing) I did.
346
00:15:54,519 --> 00:15:57,588
I was just so caught up with
all those songs and speeches.
347
00:15:58,583 --> 00:16:02,407
Can I just say you make me proud
to be a part of this organization?
348
00:16:02,413 --> 00:16:05,689
Your hard work is an
inspiration to those girls.
349
00:16:05,774 --> 00:16:08,283
SOFIA: Who's ready for some tequila?
350
00:16:10,896 --> 00:16:13,696
Is that Squirrel
Ranger drinking alcohol?
351
00:16:14,154 --> 00:16:16,766
Sofia, this is Ms. Perkins,
352
00:16:16,772 --> 00:16:19,169
the regional director
for the Squirrel Rangers.
353
00:16:19,357 --> 00:16:22,194
Um, you know what, this is
actually okay because I look young,
354
00:16:22,200 --> 00:16:23,764
- but I'm actually 24.
- Mm-hmm.
355
00:16:23,770 --> 00:16:26,546
So you're impersonating
a Squirrel Ranger?
356
00:16:26,906 --> 00:16:29,750
Uh, what's worse?
Impersonating a Squirrel Ranger
357
00:16:29,756 --> 00:16:31,256
or being a drunk nine-year-old?
358
00:16:33,314 --> 00:16:36,375
Sofia, I can't believe
this. You tricked me.
359
00:16:36,381 --> 00:16:39,186
Sandy, I had no knowledge of this.
360
00:16:40,873 --> 00:16:43,203
And given the situation,
361
00:16:43,209 --> 00:16:46,027
I think that you and I
should go on this cruise.
362
00:16:46,307 --> 00:16:47,791
I don't think so.
363
00:16:47,797 --> 00:16:50,017
You've disgraced the Squirrel Rangers.
364
00:16:50,023 --> 00:16:51,830
Now hand over your sash.
365
00:16:51,994 --> 00:16:53,194
Damn it.
366
00:16:53,200 --> 00:16:55,299
Sash! She said sash!
367
00:16:57,299 --> 00:16:59,707
Thank God. You can have this.
368
00:17:05,918 --> 00:17:07,884
Oh, my damn.
369
00:17:08,646 --> 00:17:10,570
(sighs)
370
00:17:10,576 --> 00:17:12,864
Want to smoke some of that
and eat a bunch of cookies?
371
00:17:13,909 --> 00:17:17,884
When they go low, we get high.
372
00:17:25,055 --> 00:17:26,369
What's all this?
373
00:17:28,274 --> 00:17:31,064
I wanted to extend an olive brunch.
374
00:17:33,972 --> 00:17:35,190
You get it?
375
00:17:36,277 --> 00:17:37,478
It'll hit you later.
376
00:17:38,000 --> 00:17:40,141
Listen, I just... I wanted to apologize
377
00:17:40,147 --> 00:17:41,797
about everything that
happened with your dad.
378
00:17:41,803 --> 00:17:44,805
Look, it wasn't all your fault. I
mean, I went along with the plan.
379
00:17:44,811 --> 00:17:46,288
Yeah, but I started it.
380
00:17:46,294 --> 00:17:48,360
Right, I want you to know
that I'm done butting in.
381
00:17:48,366 --> 00:17:51,264
After thinking of everything you
did to get you and your dad together,
382
00:17:51,270 --> 00:17:53,660
I realized that you can't
force people to connect.
383
00:17:53,666 --> 00:17:54,866
(knocking)
384
00:17:55,561 --> 00:17:58,670
You know, not every
relationship has a happy ending.
385
00:18:00,381 --> 00:18:02,701
You better be here to
give Josh a happy ending!
386
00:18:04,185 --> 00:18:06,998
No... no... n-not... not
like that. I didn't do this.
387
00:18:09,134 --> 00:18:10,931
I couldn't leave things like that.
388
00:18:11,638 --> 00:18:15,322
Josh, I just want to say that
you were right about everything
389
00:18:15,328 --> 00:18:16,653
and I am really sorry.
390
00:18:16,659 --> 00:18:19,029
I have no excuse for
abandoning you and your mom.
391
00:18:19,035 --> 00:18:20,862
You were young and
terrified and confused.
392
00:18:20,868 --> 00:18:22,183
- BOTH: Gabi.
- Okay.
393
00:18:22,846 --> 00:18:24,174
When Gabi told me you were gay,
394
00:18:24,180 --> 00:18:27,035
I thought I could swoop in and be
the cool accepting dad you never had.
395
00:18:27,041 --> 00:18:29,792
That way, it'd make up for a little
of the time I wasn't there for you.
396
00:18:29,798 --> 00:18:30,998
Yeah.
397
00:18:31,004 --> 00:18:33,590
I think maybe we just put a little
too much pressure on ourselves too,
398
00:18:33,596 --> 00:18:35,572
trying to make up for
30 years in two days.
399
00:18:35,635 --> 00:18:38,167
Maybe we did. What if I stuck
around for an extra day? We could
400
00:18:38,173 --> 00:18:39,907
go fishing, catch a game.
401
00:18:40,711 --> 00:18:43,201
Actually, and I kid you not,
402
00:18:43,993 --> 00:18:45,325
you know what I'd like to do?
403
00:18:45,586 --> 00:18:46,794
See Wicked again.
404
00:18:46,800 --> 00:18:48,487
So would I!
405
00:18:49,211 --> 00:18:51,229
- It was surprisingly great.
- Right?!
406
00:18:51,235 --> 00:18:53,059
Such a fresh twist on a classic tale.
407
00:18:54,449 --> 00:18:55,853
Tell you what.
408
00:18:55,855 --> 00:18:57,364
Why don't we go enjoy Gabi's brunch?
409
00:18:57,370 --> 00:18:59,467
- I'll get us tickets.
- That'd be great.
410
00:18:59,473 --> 00:19:01,270
See if you can get us house seats.
411
00:19:01,276 --> 00:19:02,645
Come on, you're rich.
412
00:19:03,122 --> 00:19:05,328
Looks like... looks like
everything worked out,
413
00:19:05,334 --> 00:19:08,329
which means butting in
does work. Not every time...
414
00:19:09,528 --> 00:19:11,310
(sing-songy) but most times.
415
00:19:17,163 --> 00:19:19,399
Argh! Oh.
416
00:19:19,405 --> 00:19:21,406
Oh, my back!
417
00:19:21,412 --> 00:19:24,004
Whew, I can't play.
418
00:19:24,010 --> 00:19:25,968
(exhales) Who's left on the bench?
419
00:19:27,435 --> 00:19:28,635
Elliot!
420
00:19:28,943 --> 00:19:31,834
Uhhh, I have to go to the bathroom.
421
00:19:31,840 --> 00:19:33,744
No, no, no, Elliot, we need you.
422
00:19:33,750 --> 00:19:35,455
For what? A fro-yo run?
423
00:19:35,935 --> 00:19:38,021
It's the bottom of the ninth, two outs.
424
00:19:38,027 --> 00:19:40,659
We're down a run and
the bases are loaded!
425
00:19:40,729 --> 00:19:42,539
I don't know what any of that means.
426
00:19:43,526 --> 00:19:45,348
Just go stand there
427
00:19:45,354 --> 00:19:47,875
- and get hit by a pitch.
- Oof.
428
00:19:48,034 --> 00:19:50,923
But then my softball
costume will get dirty,
429
00:19:50,929 --> 00:19:53,384
- Yeah!
- and it's so beautiful.
430
00:19:53,390 --> 00:19:56,307
Look, it's whiter than
a Mumford & Sons concert.
431
00:19:57,153 --> 00:19:59,253
Just take one for the team.
432
00:20:04,074 --> 00:20:06,261
I can't!
433
00:20:06,730 --> 00:20:08,285
Hah-ha!
434
00:20:11,408 --> 00:20:14,408
(heroic music plays)
435
00:20:42,247 --> 00:20:48,247
Sync & Corrections by PetaG
www.addic7ed.com
436
00:20:48,297 --> 00:20:52,847
Repair and Synchronization by
Easy Subtitles Synchronizer 1.0.0.0
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