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Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:02,406 --> 00:00:04,067 Okay, I'm doing my free spray tan now. 2 00:00:04,078 --> 00:00:06,536 Uh, no you are not! 3 00:00:09,085 --> 00:00:12,966 I'm locking up for Martina, so she said that I could get the free spray tan. 4 00:00:12,977 --> 00:00:16,079 What? But you're already a beautiful shade of J-Lo. You don't need it. 5 00:00:16,242 --> 00:00:17,452 Fine, you can have it. 6 00:00:17,463 --> 00:00:20,210 And then afterwards, can we go barhopping and meet some guys? 7 00:00:20,221 --> 00:00:22,605 No, I can't. You know... 8 00:00:23,135 --> 00:00:24,335 Josh. 9 00:00:24,651 --> 00:00:27,554 Gabi, you and Josh have been broken up for, like, a month. 10 00:00:27,565 --> 00:00:29,408 Okay? You are allowed to date. 11 00:00:29,419 --> 00:00:32,499 Am I? I mean, Josh is in therapy, working on his commitment issues 12 00:00:32,510 --> 00:00:35,206 and I want to be with him, so I should wait, right? 13 00:00:35,389 --> 00:00:38,186 Why can't you date while you wait? 14 00:00:38,815 --> 00:00:41,903 I feel like it's one or the other, you know? I'm either dating or I'm waiting, 15 00:00:41,914 --> 00:00:44,420 - and right now, I'm... - (clunking and jingling) 16 00:00:44,431 --> 00:00:46,230 Oh, my God, someone's breaking in! 17 00:00:47,977 --> 00:00:50,001 (gasps) He's robbing Martina! 18 00:00:50,012 --> 00:00:51,223 Okay, we gotta call 9-1-1. 19 00:00:51,234 --> 00:00:53,219 - Grab... grab your phone. - Okay. Good idea. 20 00:00:55,019 --> 00:00:57,371 - Whoa. - Whoa. 21 00:00:57,956 --> 00:00:59,234 (shutter clicks) 22 00:00:59,245 --> 00:01:01,906 I'm not stealing, okay? I was just taking money out of the jar... 23 00:01:02,237 --> 00:01:04,963 which sounds a lot like stealing, but it's not. 24 00:01:04,974 --> 00:01:06,376 Okay, well, I'm calling 9-1-1. 25 00:01:06,387 --> 00:01:08,016 - No, no, no, no, seriously. - Oh, just save it. 26 00:01:08,027 --> 00:01:10,839 Wait, wait, wait, Sofia. Let the cute guy talk. 27 00:01:11,920 --> 00:01:14,226 - Hi, what's your name? - Rob. 28 00:01:14,237 --> 00:01:16,121 What's your last name? "Ber"? 29 00:01:16,132 --> 00:01:18,699 (laughs) Rob Ber. You're funny. 30 00:01:18,710 --> 00:01:21,046 (laughs) I'm funny too. 31 00:01:22,063 --> 00:01:24,531 Gabi. Explain yourself. 32 00:01:24,542 --> 00:01:26,002 My car is parked next door in the garage 33 00:01:26,013 --> 00:01:27,988 and I can't get it out because they only accept cash. 34 00:01:27,999 --> 00:01:29,754 I tried the ATM, but it's broken. 35 00:01:29,765 --> 00:01:32,504 I saw the light on, so I came in to see if I could borrow 20 from Martina. 36 00:01:32,515 --> 00:01:34,758 Oh, Sofia, he knows Martina. It's fine. 37 00:01:34,769 --> 00:01:36,835 Gabi, what does that say? 38 00:01:38,223 --> 00:01:39,423 Martina's. 39 00:01:39,434 --> 00:01:40,634 Oh. 40 00:01:41,278 --> 00:01:43,484 Look, I was definitely gonna pay the money back tomorrow. 41 00:01:43,495 --> 00:01:45,979 I love dolphins. You know they're the only animals that have sex 42 00:01:45,990 --> 00:01:47,998 for pleasure, well, besides us? 43 00:01:48,009 --> 00:01:50,645 Oh, my God, dimples and brains. 44 00:01:50,927 --> 00:01:53,346 Look, I really gotta go. I'll just find another ATM. 45 00:01:53,357 --> 00:01:54,557 No! No, don't go! 46 00:01:54,711 --> 00:01:57,356 Um, I mean, uh... 47 00:01:57,490 --> 00:01:58,877 Here you go. 48 00:01:58,888 --> 00:02:00,584 What are you doing? 49 00:02:00,595 --> 00:02:02,162 I promise, I'm gonna pay you back. 50 00:02:02,173 --> 00:02:04,680 - Yeah, like that's ever gonna happen. - Over dinner tomorrow night? 51 00:02:04,691 --> 00:02:05,891 (Both) What? 52 00:02:05,902 --> 00:02:07,642 Gabi, let me get your number. 53 00:02:08,683 --> 00:02:11,156 - I thought you said you were wait... - Dating. I said dating. 54 00:02:12,235 --> 00:02:14,136 (theme music playing) 55 00:02:17,574 --> 00:02:19,775 She in the spotlight 56 00:02:19,786 --> 00:02:21,488 And she turned my head 57 00:02:21,499 --> 00:02:23,478 She run a red light 58 00:02:23,489 --> 00:02:25,189 'Cause she bad like that 59 00:02:25,200 --> 00:02:29,088 I like that ooh, baby, ooh, baby, baby 60 00:02:29,099 --> 00:02:32,256 - I like that ooh, baby, ooh, baby - Sync/corrections PetaG - addic7ed.com 61 00:02:32,267 --> 00:02:34,369 (giggles) 62 00:02:35,725 --> 00:02:36,977 What's so funny? 63 00:02:36,988 --> 00:02:39,709 Is that the video I sent you of Elliot trying to do yoga? 64 00:02:42,031 --> 00:02:44,166 No, this is better. 65 00:02:44,200 --> 00:02:45,601 His name is Rob. 66 00:02:45,853 --> 00:02:48,423 Oh, I'd get in a bunch of positions with him! 67 00:02:51,107 --> 00:02:55,510 Yolanda, we met last night at Martina's and it was so romantic. 68 00:02:55,521 --> 00:02:57,062 (whispers) I loaned him money. 69 00:02:58,082 --> 00:02:59,404 (whispers) Why are we whispering? 70 00:02:59,415 --> 00:03:01,325 Well, Josh is doing his therapy thing, 71 00:03:01,336 --> 00:03:04,388 and we never talked about my thing seeing other things, 72 00:03:04,399 --> 00:03:06,212 so I don't want him to know about my maybe dinner thing 73 00:03:06,223 --> 00:03:07,906 'cause that can maybe ruin everything. 74 00:03:07,917 --> 00:03:09,591 Oh, I get it! 75 00:03:09,602 --> 00:03:11,669 While Josh is on pause, 76 00:03:11,680 --> 00:03:14,285 you wanna get in someone else's drawers. 77 00:03:14,530 --> 00:03:16,031 You nasty! 78 00:03:16,065 --> 00:03:17,966 Well, it's not like I want to be with anybody else. 79 00:03:17,977 --> 00:03:19,401 You know, I wanna be with Josh, 80 00:03:19,412 --> 00:03:21,756 but when he rejected me, it felt so bad, 81 00:03:21,767 --> 00:03:24,401 and when Rob asked me out, it felt so good. 82 00:03:24,822 --> 00:03:26,628 And you know, good is so much better than bad. 83 00:03:26,639 --> 00:03:28,389 Plus, I mean, helloooo. 84 00:03:29,269 --> 00:03:30,469 (phone beeps) 85 00:03:30,480 --> 00:03:32,011 Ooh, hello! It's him. 86 00:03:32,022 --> 00:03:33,222 Who? 87 00:03:33,792 --> 00:03:35,812 It's you. I'm excited it's you. 88 00:03:36,753 --> 00:03:38,974 Aw, thanks. I'm excited too. 89 00:03:39,253 --> 00:03:41,242 You know, my therapist just gave me this new technique 90 00:03:41,253 --> 00:03:42,648 to help me with my commitment issues. 91 00:03:42,659 --> 00:03:44,359 Intensive journaling. 92 00:03:44,370 --> 00:03:46,962 I just write down all my thoughts and feelings right here, 93 00:03:46,973 --> 00:03:49,598 kind of like the journal that I kept as a kid, except this time, 94 00:03:49,609 --> 00:03:51,633 my super hot nanny won't read it and quit. 95 00:03:53,236 --> 00:03:56,138 Gabi, I really think I'm on the verge of a breakthrough. 96 00:03:57,441 --> 00:04:00,627 A breakthrough? Wow. Hey, that's... that's great. 97 00:04:00,638 --> 00:04:03,422 Um, you don't think that's gonna happen before tonight, do you? 98 00:04:03,433 --> 00:04:05,846 (chuckles) No, it doesn't work that fast. 99 00:04:05,857 --> 00:04:07,081 (chuckles) 100 00:04:07,092 --> 00:04:09,387 Okay, then you shouldn't use the word "verge." 101 00:04:11,454 --> 00:04:13,874 So what kinds of things do you journal about? 102 00:04:14,072 --> 00:04:16,191 Elliot, my journal is private. 103 00:04:16,264 --> 00:04:17,833 Fine. I don't need to know. 104 00:04:19,923 --> 00:04:21,630 (whispers) I must know. 105 00:04:25,556 --> 00:04:26,756 (rattling) 106 00:04:26,767 --> 00:04:29,851 I cannot believe you are gonna go out with that robber. 107 00:04:31,458 --> 00:04:32,842 Rob. 108 00:04:34,049 --> 00:04:36,818 Gabi, the only reason I let you give him your phone number 109 00:04:36,829 --> 00:04:39,524 is because I thought he was so sketchy, he would never call. 110 00:04:39,535 --> 00:04:40,837 But he did! 111 00:04:40,848 --> 00:04:42,050 Yay! 112 00:04:42,617 --> 00:04:45,125 Gabi, I looked him up. He's not on Facebook. 113 00:04:45,136 --> 00:04:46,531 You know who's not on Facebook? 114 00:04:46,542 --> 00:04:49,374 Criminals, hoodlums, and my Aunt Becky who lives in the forest. 115 00:04:50,412 --> 00:04:53,521 Sofie, it's just one date, okay? Will you stop freaking out? 116 00:04:53,532 --> 00:04:55,202 And let's look at the facts. 117 00:04:55,213 --> 00:04:59,291 A, he's really hot, and B... 118 00:04:59,302 --> 00:05:01,069 - (knocking) - He's here. 119 00:05:04,065 --> 00:05:06,860 $20 and nine cents interest. 120 00:05:06,871 --> 00:05:08,361 - I work in finance. - (gasps) 121 00:05:08,542 --> 00:05:10,340 (whispers) He has a job! 122 00:05:11,591 --> 00:05:13,492 Oh, yeah? Prove it. 123 00:05:15,505 --> 00:05:17,590 (chuckles) 124 00:05:17,601 --> 00:05:21,300 Oh, boy. Anyone can make a gold-embossed business card 125 00:05:21,311 --> 00:05:24,210 with a bank's official logo with three different ways of contacting them. 126 00:05:24,221 --> 00:05:26,065 I see it all the time. 127 00:05:27,717 --> 00:05:31,010 - Okay. My car's downstairs. - Oh, so is hers. 128 00:05:31,295 --> 00:05:33,927 Gabi, you're driving because I want you to be able to get away 129 00:05:33,938 --> 00:05:35,700 - if he starts any funny business. - Sofia... 130 00:05:35,711 --> 00:05:38,804 And I want you to check in with me every hour on the hour, and if you don't... 131 00:05:38,815 --> 00:05:40,322 Yeah, do you wanna just come with us? 132 00:05:40,444 --> 00:05:42,578 I think that would probably be for the best. 133 00:05:42,733 --> 00:05:43,933 Go! 134 00:05:49,831 --> 00:05:51,598 Okay, Josh, we're gonna go... 135 00:05:51,875 --> 00:05:53,809 unless you need me to do anything else... 136 00:05:54,915 --> 00:05:58,066 like run a hot bath, play some Enya, and read your journal back to you. 137 00:05:59,222 --> 00:06:01,434 Uh, no thanks, guys. I'm good. I'll see you tomorrow. 138 00:06:02,189 --> 00:06:03,867 That was just sad. 139 00:06:06,603 --> 00:06:08,993 Am I the only one who's dying to know 140 00:06:09,005 --> 00:06:10,339 what's in that journal? 141 00:06:10,350 --> 00:06:12,554 Frankly, I don't think it's any of our business. 142 00:06:13,880 --> 00:06:15,703 You saw it! 143 00:06:17,314 --> 00:06:18,780 Maybe I did. 144 00:06:18,791 --> 00:06:20,638 Maybe I was dusting his office. 145 00:06:20,649 --> 00:06:22,570 Maybe I looked over his shoulder. 146 00:06:22,890 --> 00:06:25,160 And maybe you should start looking for another job. 147 00:06:26,136 --> 00:06:27,336 What? 148 00:06:27,347 --> 00:06:29,149 Hm, I can't say anymore. 149 00:06:29,160 --> 00:06:31,467 But I did read the words 150 00:06:31,771 --> 00:06:34,766 "need to make a change," "dead weight," 151 00:06:35,130 --> 00:06:37,070 and, "Do I really need a publicist?" 152 00:06:37,556 --> 00:06:38,788 (ding) 153 00:06:38,799 --> 00:06:41,665 Oh! But I do remember one good thing. 154 00:06:41,795 --> 00:06:43,306 Yeah? 155 00:06:43,846 --> 00:06:46,695 He said I was the mother he always dreamed of having. 156 00:06:46,706 --> 00:06:49,105 - (ding) - (laughs) 157 00:06:52,743 --> 00:06:54,628 _ 158 00:06:55,197 --> 00:06:57,653 Rob, tonight has been really fun. 159 00:06:57,672 --> 00:07:00,431 I am so glad that dolphin broke his flipper. 160 00:07:00,707 --> 00:07:02,308 You make it sound like the night's over. 161 00:07:02,319 --> 00:07:04,605 Oh. Well, I didn't mean to. It was an accident. 162 00:07:05,013 --> 00:07:07,575 I'm gonna run into the liquor store and grab us a bottle of wine. 163 00:07:07,586 --> 00:07:08,786 Okay. 164 00:07:14,386 --> 00:07:15,586 (phone rings) 165 00:07:16,806 --> 00:07:18,006 Hello? 166 00:07:18,017 --> 00:07:20,097 Sofia, it's my ten o'clock check-in. 167 00:07:20,108 --> 00:07:22,777 Gabi, if he's holding you against your will, say "banana." 168 00:07:24,287 --> 00:07:27,123 Will you give it a rest? We've been talking nonstop. 169 00:07:27,134 --> 00:07:28,734 I told him all about my job being a chef 170 00:07:28,745 --> 00:07:30,472 and he told me all about his job doing... 171 00:07:30,777 --> 00:07:33,574 something that requires something boring. 172 00:07:34,125 --> 00:07:36,172 Trust me, he's a really great guy. 173 00:07:36,183 --> 00:07:39,117 You were so wrong about him and you have nothing to worry about. 174 00:07:39,369 --> 00:07:42,134 Oh, he's coming. Okay, I gotta go. Bye. 175 00:07:43,643 --> 00:07:45,858 - Hey. - Drive, drive, drive! 176 00:07:51,057 --> 00:07:52,382 Oh, my God! 177 00:07:53,065 --> 00:07:54,715 Banana, banana, banana! 178 00:07:56,338 --> 00:07:58,401 I told you he was bad! 179 00:07:58,773 --> 00:07:59,979 What happened? 180 00:07:59,990 --> 00:08:02,563 Um, we may have just a little bit... 181 00:08:02,573 --> 00:08:03,849 robbed a liquor store. 182 00:08:04,420 --> 00:08:05,664 What?! 183 00:08:05,675 --> 00:08:08,672 Quick! I need lighter fluid, nail polish remover, 184 00:08:08,683 --> 00:08:10,147 and more hairspray! 185 00:08:10,158 --> 00:08:11,892 I have to destroy the evidence! 186 00:08:13,018 --> 00:08:14,218 Gabi, just... 187 00:08:14,229 --> 00:08:16,236 Okay, just tell me exactly what happened! 188 00:08:16,247 --> 00:08:17,532 No! I can't! 189 00:08:17,544 --> 00:08:20,413 Or you won't have that thing where you don't know anything! 190 00:08:20,654 --> 00:08:21,854 Huh? 191 00:08:23,006 --> 00:08:25,686 (pants) You know, the thing 192 00:08:25,697 --> 00:08:28,364 where you can't testify against me because you don't have any information. 193 00:08:28,375 --> 00:08:30,832 You mean for robbing a liquor store? You already told me. 194 00:08:30,843 --> 00:08:32,073 Damn it! 195 00:08:32,847 --> 00:08:35,085 Okay, just take a deep breath please 196 00:08:35,096 --> 00:08:36,937 and... and then tell me exactly what happened. 197 00:08:36,948 --> 00:08:39,885 Okay, so right after I talked to you and everything was going great, 198 00:08:39,896 --> 00:08:41,408 everything went bad. 199 00:08:41,700 --> 00:08:43,286 Rob jumped in the car with his hood up, 200 00:08:43,297 --> 00:08:45,193 all out of breath and yelled, "Drive, drive, drive!" 201 00:08:45,204 --> 00:08:47,592 So, I asked him, you know, "Rob, what's wrong?" 202 00:08:47,603 --> 00:08:49,053 But he screamed, "Just drive!" 203 00:08:49,064 --> 00:08:52,623 So, I just drove and after a few blocks, he remembered he "had a thing," 204 00:08:52,634 --> 00:08:55,575 so I dropped him off at some corner and he ran into the night! 205 00:08:55,883 --> 00:08:57,646 Oh, my God! We gotta call the police! 206 00:08:57,657 --> 00:09:00,428 No, no, no, no! Sofia, I drove the getaway car. 207 00:09:00,439 --> 00:09:01,907 I'm an accessory! 208 00:09:01,918 --> 00:09:04,824 Oh, my God, what if he comes back to kill me because I'm a witness?! 209 00:09:04,835 --> 00:09:07,264 Gabi, believe me, that guy is so far out of town right now. 210 00:09:07,275 --> 00:09:09,109 - (knocking) - Gabi, it's Rob! 211 00:09:09,120 --> 00:09:10,864 Oh, my God, he's in town. He's in town! 212 00:09:10,875 --> 00:09:13,202 Okay, calm down, calm down. What do you think he's gonna do? 213 00:09:13,213 --> 00:09:14,710 Murder you for being a witness and then murder me 214 00:09:14,721 --> 00:09:16,350 for witnessing him murder a witness? 215 00:09:16,361 --> 00:09:17,634 Oh, no... 216 00:09:17,645 --> 00:09:19,985 I'm not wearing the underwear that I want to die in! 217 00:09:20,907 --> 00:09:22,523 Okay, let's just get out of here! 218 00:09:22,534 --> 00:09:24,829 - Let's escape! - Okay. Fire escape, fire escape! 219 00:09:26,882 --> 00:09:28,416 (both panting) 220 00:09:31,142 --> 00:09:32,876 What now? What now? What now? 221 00:09:32,887 --> 00:09:34,642 - Let's go to Yolanda's. - Okay. 222 00:09:35,483 --> 00:09:37,662 No! No! She's not home! 223 00:09:37,673 --> 00:09:39,627 - What's today? - Uh, T... Tuesday. 224 00:09:39,638 --> 00:09:42,332 Damn it! It's Afro Soul Night at The Zoom Room! 225 00:09:43,708 --> 00:09:45,442 - What now? What now? - Call her! 226 00:09:45,453 --> 00:09:47,981 No, I can't! My phone is in my evidence purse. 227 00:09:47,992 --> 00:09:49,938 - You call her. - No, I... I can't. My phone's dead! 228 00:09:49,949 --> 00:09:51,516 Like we're gonna be if we go back in there! 229 00:09:51,527 --> 00:09:54,162 Oh, this is what I get for dating and not waiting! 230 00:09:54,375 --> 00:09:55,642 Okay, I'm gonna do it. 231 00:09:58,408 --> 00:09:59,655 - (knocking) - (Rob) Gabi! 232 00:09:59,666 --> 00:10:01,000 - Run! - Run! 233 00:10:11,390 --> 00:10:12,858 (Elliot's voice) If I was a tablet 234 00:10:12,869 --> 00:10:16,614 containing Josh's deepest thoughts about me, 235 00:10:16,799 --> 00:10:18,667 where would I be? 236 00:10:21,562 --> 00:10:22,829 Darn! 237 00:10:23,703 --> 00:10:29,067 If I was a macaroon in Josh's cookie jar, what flavor would I be? 238 00:10:31,409 --> 00:10:32,609 Raspberry. 239 00:10:49,410 --> 00:10:50,610 Ow. 240 00:10:55,574 --> 00:10:57,375 (snorts, groans) 241 00:11:07,875 --> 00:11:09,317 I can't believe it. 242 00:11:09,592 --> 00:11:14,477 I layeth next to my forbidden love and our hearts doth beat as one. 243 00:11:14,725 --> 00:11:16,002 Stop, Elliot! 244 00:11:16,392 --> 00:11:18,105 Thou must focus. 245 00:11:24,344 --> 00:11:26,251 Sleep well, my little prince. 246 00:11:33,419 --> 00:11:34,619 Ow. 247 00:11:41,724 --> 00:11:44,292 Oh, my God, you're a genius. 248 00:11:44,303 --> 00:11:46,437 I can never remember her lockbox code. 249 00:11:46,448 --> 00:11:47,807 Gabi, it's four zeros. 250 00:11:47,818 --> 00:11:50,055 (sighs) Okay, good call coming into Martina's. 251 00:11:50,066 --> 00:11:51,614 Nothing bad ever happens to me here. 252 00:11:51,625 --> 00:11:53,122 Except for that one time I got bangs. 253 00:11:53,958 --> 00:11:56,635 Gabi, Rob could be following us. We need to call the police. 254 00:11:56,646 --> 00:11:58,607 No, no, no, no, there has to be another option. 255 00:11:58,618 --> 00:12:00,288 What about Josh? 256 00:12:00,299 --> 00:12:01,592 (whines) 257 00:12:01,603 --> 00:12:02,866 No! 258 00:12:02,877 --> 00:12:05,512 No. Whining until I give in is just not gonna work this time. 259 00:12:05,523 --> 00:12:07,211 (whines) 260 00:12:07,222 --> 00:12:09,444 - I'm calling him. - No! 261 00:12:09,455 --> 00:12:11,110 Sofia, we can't call Josh, okay? 262 00:12:11,120 --> 00:12:13,870 Because even though it's probably not gonna work out with Rob... 263 00:12:13,881 --> 00:12:15,161 Oh, "probably"? 264 00:12:16,251 --> 00:12:19,689 - I just don't think he needs to know. - We need a rich guy with lawyers. 265 00:12:19,700 --> 00:12:21,768 Do you know one of those who isn't Josh? 266 00:12:22,657 --> 00:12:23,888 No. 267 00:12:24,519 --> 00:12:26,038 Fine. I'll call. 268 00:12:29,491 --> 00:12:30,691 Boop, boop, boop. 269 00:12:30,702 --> 00:12:32,860 Boop, boop, boop, boop, boop, boop. 270 00:12:32,894 --> 00:12:34,557 I see you booping. 271 00:12:36,828 --> 00:12:38,528 (phone rings) 272 00:12:40,755 --> 00:12:43,101 - (Gabi) Josh! Josh! - Gabi? 273 00:12:44,053 --> 00:12:45,386 Wait, where are you? 274 00:12:46,681 --> 00:12:48,027 Okay, I'm on my way! 275 00:12:50,819 --> 00:12:53,854 "I can't stop thinking about Gabi. 276 00:12:53,865 --> 00:12:56,967 Why can't I commit to this amazing woman?" 277 00:12:58,482 --> 00:13:00,654 This is what I left Josh's bed for? 278 00:13:01,983 --> 00:13:04,118 Find "Elliot." 279 00:13:05,486 --> 00:13:07,087 Zero results?! 280 00:13:07,230 --> 00:13:08,798 Yolanda set me up! 281 00:13:08,808 --> 00:13:10,208 That bitch! 282 00:13:11,771 --> 00:13:13,038 (footsteps) 283 00:13:18,220 --> 00:13:19,715 (beeping) 284 00:13:19,726 --> 00:13:21,824 (Female electronic voice) Motion detectors on 285 00:13:21,835 --> 00:13:27,457 in five, four, three, two, one. 286 00:13:27,673 --> 00:13:30,208 - (beep) - Motion detectors on. 287 00:13:37,828 --> 00:13:39,361 Aah! Help! 288 00:13:41,789 --> 00:13:44,632 Are you guys okay? Gabi, what's going on? 289 00:13:44,643 --> 00:13:48,334 Josh, this is really hard for me to say, but the truth is that, uh... 290 00:13:49,138 --> 00:13:52,036 Sofia may have accidentally been involved in a liquor store robbery. 291 00:13:53,573 --> 00:13:54,807 What? 292 00:13:54,935 --> 00:13:57,185 Well, to be fair, she didn't know he was a criminal 293 00:13:57,196 --> 00:13:58,960 until she was driving the getaway car. 294 00:13:59,053 --> 00:14:00,921 But for the record, I thought he was sketchy. 295 00:14:02,375 --> 00:14:04,848 Oh, wow. Sofia, I'm really surprised. 296 00:14:04,859 --> 00:14:06,621 I don't know what I was thinking. 297 00:14:06,632 --> 00:14:08,341 Gabi, what was I thinking? 298 00:14:08,352 --> 00:14:11,953 She wasn't. She was hypnotized by the allure of his dimples. 299 00:14:13,032 --> 00:14:15,415 Anyway, uh, when he showed up at our place looking for her, we ran to the 300 00:14:15,426 --> 00:14:16,929 fire escape and we called you. 301 00:14:16,940 --> 00:14:18,474 (phone rings) 302 00:14:19,458 --> 00:14:20,922 That's weird. It's my alarm company. 303 00:14:20,933 --> 00:14:22,133 Hello? 304 00:14:22,408 --> 00:14:24,040 Yes, this is Josh Kaminski. 305 00:14:25,431 --> 00:14:27,696 Oh, my God. Rob is robbing Josh. 306 00:14:27,707 --> 00:14:29,526 - Why would he do that? - Because he's a robber. 307 00:14:29,537 --> 00:14:31,149 - This is what he does! - Okay. 308 00:14:31,798 --> 00:14:34,170 Let me make a phone call. I'm sure we don't need the police. 309 00:14:34,181 --> 00:14:35,509 No! We need the police! We need the police! 310 00:14:35,520 --> 00:14:37,096 We need the police! We need the police! 311 00:14:39,375 --> 00:14:41,330 Why do we need the police? 312 00:14:41,341 --> 00:14:43,591 Sofia told her date that I work for Josh Kaminski, 313 00:14:43,602 --> 00:14:46,682 who's a really rich tech millionaire and he has lots of nice stuff. 314 00:14:46,693 --> 00:14:48,494 Sofia, why would you tell him that? 315 00:14:49,772 --> 00:14:52,009 Because she really wanted to impress him... 316 00:14:52,222 --> 00:14:54,637 h... she... him... she... Soph... 317 00:14:54,648 --> 00:14:56,315 Me, okay?! It was me! 318 00:14:56,542 --> 00:14:57,945 I was the one who went on the date. 319 00:14:57,956 --> 00:14:59,476 I'm the one who drove the getaway car. 320 00:14:59,487 --> 00:15:01,955 I'm the one who told him you live in the fanciest building in Nob Hill 321 00:15:01,966 --> 00:15:04,455 with a night doorman who's always playing Candy Crush, 322 00:15:04,466 --> 00:15:07,167 and he's obviously over there right now robbing you blind! 323 00:15:08,095 --> 00:15:09,295 Oh, my God. 324 00:15:09,306 --> 00:15:12,482 I know. I am so sorry. This is all my fault. 325 00:15:12,493 --> 00:15:14,082 You're dating?! 326 00:15:19,117 --> 00:15:20,317 (ding) 327 00:15:28,214 --> 00:15:30,315 Okay, stay behind me. 328 00:15:30,334 --> 00:15:32,309 - Mr. Kamin... - (screams) 329 00:15:35,118 --> 00:15:37,642 Yes? I'm Josh Kaminski. How can I help you? Is everything okay? 330 00:15:37,856 --> 00:15:39,180 Now it is. 331 00:15:39,191 --> 00:15:41,496 - But you were being robbed. - (Both) Oh, my God! 332 00:15:41,507 --> 00:15:44,090 We got the guy. He's not going quietly. 333 00:15:45,628 --> 00:15:47,529 (sobs) 334 00:15:48,764 --> 00:15:51,931 I'm too pretty to go to prison! 335 00:15:51,942 --> 00:15:53,142 Elliot? 336 00:15:53,153 --> 00:15:56,462 Found this man frozen on all fours in your living room. 337 00:15:58,224 --> 00:16:00,003 I'm just thankful he wasn't naked. 338 00:16:01,875 --> 00:16:03,820 I could tell you some stories. 339 00:16:03,914 --> 00:16:05,569 Okay, this is my publicist. He works here. 340 00:16:05,580 --> 00:16:07,882 - This is a misunderstanding. - Yeah! 341 00:16:07,893 --> 00:16:11,141 The only crime committed here was that he didn't write about me in his journal! 342 00:16:12,955 --> 00:16:14,522 How do you know that? 343 00:16:15,137 --> 00:16:16,410 Elliot! 344 00:16:16,421 --> 00:16:18,721 I told you my journal was private! 345 00:16:19,477 --> 00:16:21,645 Obviously this is just a lovers' quarrel. 346 00:16:21,656 --> 00:16:23,174 No need to write this up. 347 00:16:23,398 --> 00:16:26,271 Yes, no need to write anything about me. 348 00:16:26,282 --> 00:16:27,713 No one else does. 349 00:16:29,867 --> 00:16:32,302 Well, uh, looks like we're done here. 350 00:16:32,313 --> 00:16:33,914 No, no, no, no, Officer. 351 00:16:33,925 --> 00:16:35,659 There was a crime committed tonight, 352 00:16:35,670 --> 00:16:38,073 down at the liquor store on the corner of Olive and Birch. 353 00:16:38,084 --> 00:16:39,619 I know 'cause I was there, 354 00:16:39,630 --> 00:16:42,784 and now the very handsome robber is after me and my roommate. 355 00:16:44,171 --> 00:16:46,406 Oh, no crime was committed there. 356 00:16:46,417 --> 00:16:48,618 I was just there buying some feminine products. 357 00:16:50,325 --> 00:16:51,611 For my daughter. 358 00:16:52,072 --> 00:16:55,821 I'm a single dad. She's 11. Is that too early for her to start her 359 00:16:55,832 --> 00:16:57,415 - womanhood? - (whistles) 360 00:16:57,426 --> 00:16:58,712 Not nowadays. 361 00:16:58,723 --> 00:17:00,517 Girls are getting their periods at nine. 362 00:17:00,528 --> 00:17:02,993 - It's the hormones in the milk. - Hey! 363 00:17:03,345 --> 00:17:05,034 We are in danger here. 364 00:17:05,443 --> 00:17:07,477 We need a police escort back to our house. 365 00:17:07,488 --> 00:17:10,490 Okay. I can take you back, but I need to ask you a few questions. 366 00:17:10,741 --> 00:17:13,650 Officer, we will give you all the information you need. 367 00:17:14,011 --> 00:17:16,888 On those feminine pads, what are the wings for? 368 00:17:23,599 --> 00:17:25,452 Police! I'm comin' in! 369 00:17:27,603 --> 00:17:29,037 (phone chimes) 370 00:17:29,251 --> 00:17:31,018 Oh, it's my voice mail. 371 00:17:31,451 --> 00:17:32,771 Oh, my God! It's him! 372 00:17:32,782 --> 00:17:34,066 Wait, Officer Morrison! 373 00:17:34,242 --> 00:17:36,138 This is the guy. He left me a voice mail. 374 00:17:36,149 --> 00:17:38,066 Maybe he'll say something to prove he's a thief. 375 00:17:38,077 --> 00:17:40,178 Hey, Gabi. It's me, Rob. 376 00:17:40,189 --> 00:17:42,006 You didn't answer your door, so I'm calling to explain 377 00:17:42,017 --> 00:17:44,188 - what happened at the liquor store. - Here we go. 378 00:17:44,199 --> 00:17:46,337 Gabi, I'm a bad, bad guy. 379 00:17:46,348 --> 00:17:47,614 This is it, this is it. 380 00:17:48,407 --> 00:17:49,702 I have a girlfriend, 381 00:17:50,117 --> 00:17:53,321 and when I went into the liquor store, she was there, so I panicked and ran. 382 00:17:55,236 --> 00:17:56,779 I kind of live with her, 383 00:17:56,790 --> 00:17:59,217 so if you still want to hang out, call me at work. 384 00:18:01,118 --> 00:18:02,805 Yes! He has a girlfriend. 385 00:18:04,928 --> 00:18:08,415 I mean... Yes, no crime was committed. 386 00:18:08,690 --> 00:18:11,359 We can all sleep, uh, a little better tonight. 387 00:18:12,648 --> 00:18:13,948 I won't. 388 00:18:13,959 --> 00:18:15,841 My daughter just texted me to bring home 389 00:18:15,852 --> 00:18:18,638 some rocky road, The Notebook, and Midol. 390 00:18:20,178 --> 00:18:22,260 It's gonna be a long night. 391 00:18:25,183 --> 00:18:26,725 Okay, I'm just gonna get going. 392 00:18:26,736 --> 00:18:28,137 Wait. Josh? 393 00:18:28,625 --> 00:18:29,825 We need to talk. 394 00:18:29,836 --> 00:18:31,730 (chuckles) Boy, do we ever. 395 00:18:31,741 --> 00:18:33,621 I mean, I didn't want to scare Officer Morrison, 396 00:18:33,632 --> 00:18:36,035 but I didn't get my period until I was... Good night. 397 00:18:39,576 --> 00:18:40,894 I just want to say, 398 00:18:41,366 --> 00:18:44,035 I'm really sorry for dating behind your back 399 00:18:44,142 --> 00:18:47,611 even though it wasn't really behind your back because we're not together. 400 00:18:48,970 --> 00:18:50,634 Gabi, you don't have to apologize. 401 00:18:50,645 --> 00:18:52,419 Then why do I feel like I need to apologize? 402 00:18:52,430 --> 00:18:53,813 Because you should. 403 00:18:54,617 --> 00:18:57,680 What? Listen, Josh, if you want me to wait until you solve 404 00:18:57,691 --> 00:18:59,732 your issues, just say that and that's what I'll do. 405 00:18:59,743 --> 00:19:01,878 - I want you to wait. - But that's not fair! 406 00:19:04,394 --> 00:19:06,595 Look, if you want to date... 407 00:19:07,721 --> 00:19:09,175 - then you should... - Okay. 408 00:19:09,186 --> 00:19:10,486 - n't. - What?! 409 00:19:11,183 --> 00:19:12,729 You shouldn't... 410 00:19:13,192 --> 00:19:14,549 but you can... 411 00:19:14,980 --> 00:19:16,180 n't. 412 00:19:16,651 --> 00:19:18,768 Josh, do you want me to date or not? 413 00:19:18,942 --> 00:19:20,142 No. 414 00:19:20,813 --> 00:19:22,526 But I can't ask you to wait. 415 00:19:22,738 --> 00:19:24,017 That's not right. 416 00:19:25,185 --> 00:19:26,980 So, I'm dating? 417 00:19:28,937 --> 00:19:30,370 I guess... 418 00:19:30,631 --> 00:19:31,871 you're dating. 419 00:19:32,329 --> 00:19:34,066 And you're okay with that? 420 00:19:36,215 --> 00:19:37,577 I guess... 421 00:19:38,214 --> 00:19:39,798 I'm okay with that. 422 00:19:41,573 --> 00:19:43,559 As long as every date ends with you calling me up 423 00:19:43,570 --> 00:19:45,987 in the middle of the night telling me what a disaster it was. 424 00:19:46,967 --> 00:19:48,167 Deal. 425 00:19:49,152 --> 00:19:50,418 Good night, Gabi. 426 00:19:50,811 --> 00:19:52,035 Night, Josh. 427 00:19:56,690 --> 00:19:59,368 (vocalizing) 428 00:19:59,379 --> 00:20:00,713 Whoo! Boom! 429 00:20:02,012 --> 00:20:03,273 Oh, my damn. 430 00:20:03,638 --> 00:20:05,792 Am I at your penthouse? 431 00:20:06,754 --> 00:20:08,722 I'm drunker than I thought! 432 00:20:10,267 --> 00:20:11,995 You mind if I come in? 433 00:20:15,065 --> 00:20:16,999 Josh, I know what I did was really wrong 434 00:20:17,010 --> 00:20:18,619 but I just have to say it really hurts 435 00:20:18,630 --> 00:20:21,256 that you didn't mention me at all in your journal. 436 00:20:21,267 --> 00:20:22,607 Would you like to know why? 437 00:20:22,618 --> 00:20:24,550 It doesn't even matter! I... 438 00:20:24,561 --> 00:20:25,761 Yes. 439 00:20:27,240 --> 00:20:29,242 Because you're my best friend, Elliot. 440 00:20:29,470 --> 00:20:32,477 When I have feelings I want to express, I just talk to you freely. 441 00:20:32,679 --> 00:20:34,870 We have a completely open and honest relationship. 442 00:20:34,881 --> 00:20:36,493 - We do? - We did. 443 00:20:36,783 --> 00:20:39,542 Until you violated my privacy and you shattered my trust. 444 00:20:39,553 --> 00:20:41,454 I'm really sorry, Josh. 445 00:20:43,723 --> 00:20:45,444 I'm getting in the journal 446 00:20:45,455 --> 00:20:47,663 - I'm getting in the journ... - Sync/corrections PetaG - addic7ed.com 447 00:20:47,713 --> 00:20:52,263 Repair and Synchronization by Easy Subtitles Synchronizer 1.0.0.0 33477

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