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1
00:00:00,862 --> 00:00:02,069
Okay, I'm off to work.
2
00:00:02,069 --> 00:00:04,496
Oh, the hell you are!
3
00:00:05,205 --> 00:00:06,057
What?
4
00:00:07,107 --> 00:00:09,686
Gabi, this place is messier than your life.
5
00:00:09,742 --> 00:00:12,410
Okay, well, when I sleep
out here, this is my bedroom.
6
00:00:12,411 --> 00:00:15,123
Okay, but when we wake
up, it is our living room.
7
00:00:15,361 --> 00:00:16,853
Fine.
8
00:00:19,491 --> 00:00:21,559
Cleaning is so hard.
9
00:00:22,139 --> 00:00:26,421
(Grunting)
10
00:00:26,423 --> 00:00:27,824
Ugh!
11
00:00:30,477 --> 00:00:31,651
Happy?
12
00:00:31,652 --> 00:00:34,095
I will be when we get
a two-bedroom apartment.
13
00:00:34,096 --> 00:00:37,517
Well, you're never gonna be, then, because
nobody leaves this rent-controlled building
14
00:00:37,518 --> 00:00:39,353
unless they're rolled out of here.
15
00:00:39,353 --> 00:00:40,754
(Both gasp)
16
00:00:42,552 --> 00:00:43,720
Oh, my God!
17
00:00:43,721 --> 00:00:45,589
That's Mrs. Jacobsen from 2B.
18
00:00:45,590 --> 00:00:46,992
Wha-what happened?
19
00:00:46,993 --> 00:00:47,810
She fell.
20
00:00:47,811 --> 00:00:50,415
She stumbled from the master
bedroom, through the guest bathroom,
21
00:00:50,416 --> 00:00:51,971
hit her head on the washer/dryer,
22
00:00:51,972 --> 00:00:53,475
then collapsed in the second bedroom.
23
00:00:53,645 --> 00:00:55,147
Dead.
24
00:00:55,205 --> 00:00:58,224
Oh, my God, I can't
believe Mrs. Jacobsen...
25
00:00:58,225 --> 00:00:59,993
had a second bedroom!
26
00:01:00,157 --> 00:01:03,431
Gabi, poor Mrs. Jacobsen!
May she rest in peace.
27
00:01:03,432 --> 00:01:06,001
Yes, and may I rest in her second bedroom!
28
00:01:06,002 --> 00:01:07,637
Okay, that is so mean.
29
00:01:07,638 --> 00:01:10,040
Really? Meaner than when she called
you a whore for wearing pants?
30
00:01:10,041 --> 00:01:11,625
Oh, that's right.
31
00:01:11,626 --> 00:01:14,428
We are so getting that
dead bitch's apartment.
32
00:01:15,189 --> 00:01:16,957
Well, how? I mean, this is San Francisco.
33
00:01:16,958 --> 00:01:18,369
Apartments are really hard to find.
34
00:01:18,370 --> 00:01:20,138
I bet that paramedic already
has an application in for it.
35
00:01:20,139 --> 00:01:21,594
Yeah, but we know the landlord.
36
00:01:21,595 --> 00:01:23,378
So, all we gotta do is
convince him to give it to us.
37
00:01:23,379 --> 00:01:26,488
And, I read an article that said you
can get anything you want from a man
38
00:01:26,489 --> 00:01:28,348
if you give him food or sex.
39
00:01:28,964 --> 00:01:31,044
You had to read an article to know that?
40
00:01:31,961 --> 00:01:33,455
- Dibs on food!
- Wait!
41
00:01:34,817 --> 00:01:36,752
(Theme music playing)
42
00:01:40,050 --> 00:01:42,219
She's in the spotlight
43
00:01:42,219 --> 00:01:44,037
And she turned my head
44
00:01:44,038 --> 00:01:46,023
She'd run a red light
45
00:01:46,023 --> 00:01:47,758
'Cause she's bad like that
46
00:01:47,758 --> 00:01:50,761
I like that ooh, baby, ooh, baby
47
00:01:50,761 --> 00:01:51,795
Baby
48
00:01:51,795 --> 00:01:54,198
I like that ooh, baby ooh, baby
49
00:01:54,199 --> 00:01:57,532
Sync & corrections by PetaG
- www.addic7ed.com -
50
00:01:57,835 --> 00:02:01,605
Wow, you're going all
out for Josh's breakfast.
51
00:02:01,605 --> 00:02:03,740
What mistake are you
making up for this time?
52
00:02:03,740 --> 00:02:07,511
Actually, I'm making pierogies
to butter up my Russian landlord.
53
00:02:07,511 --> 00:02:10,114
Oh. So you don't just screw up our lives?
54
00:02:10,114 --> 00:02:12,395
No. Didn't I tell you the good news?
55
00:02:12,396 --> 00:02:14,685
The lady across the hall died of a stroke!
56
00:02:15,919 --> 00:02:18,622
Good morning, beautiful people!
57
00:02:18,622 --> 00:02:20,023
You know who's starving? Me.
58
00:02:20,023 --> 00:02:21,422
You know why? Sex.
59
00:02:21,423 --> 00:02:22,793
You know how much? Tons.
60
00:02:24,062 --> 00:02:25,254
You know how they say
61
00:02:25,255 --> 00:02:27,569
older women are awesome 'cause
they know all kinds of stuff?
62
00:02:27,570 --> 00:02:29,369
(Giggling) They do.
63
00:02:30,767 --> 00:02:32,870
Older women? Who's the lucky lady?
64
00:02:32,870 --> 00:02:34,505
Hey!
65
00:02:34,505 --> 00:02:37,608
No! You picked her over me?
66
00:02:37,608 --> 00:02:40,679
Sorry, Elliot. I got a
little something Josh wants.
67
00:02:40,898 --> 00:02:42,866
You got a little something he doesn't.
68
00:02:44,214 --> 00:02:45,884
I don't want anything from either of you.
69
00:02:45,885 --> 00:02:47,415
Because I'm getting plenty from Shauna.
70
00:02:48,886 --> 00:02:52,222
Josh is just letting me stay here
'cause I got in a fight with Coleman.
71
00:02:52,222 --> 00:02:54,791
What? You guys just moved in
together? You're already fighting?
72
00:02:54,791 --> 00:02:57,319
I know. But, I didn't like
the way he tipped the waitress.
73
00:02:57,320 --> 00:02:59,663
- Oh, what'd he leave her?
- His phone number.
74
00:03:01,732 --> 00:03:03,000
Hi, lover.
75
00:03:03,000 --> 00:03:05,002
And I'm talking to the tall, white one.
76
00:03:05,513 --> 00:03:09,002
Guys, this is my girlfriend.
77
00:03:09,021 --> 00:03:12,337
Oh my God, you're not a
girl, you're Shauna Stevens!
78
00:03:12,338 --> 00:03:14,383
You're the tech reporter for ABC News.
79
00:03:14,384 --> 00:03:17,621
My boyfriend's a programmer, and he
has a poster of you above his bed.
80
00:03:17,753 --> 00:03:19,791
Oh, so he's the one who bought that.
81
00:03:20,951 --> 00:03:22,057
She's being modest.
82
00:03:22,070 --> 00:03:24,931
She actually has two Peabody Awards
and Anderson Cooper on speed dial.
83
00:03:25,182 --> 00:03:27,372
I have a poster of him over my bed.
84
00:03:27,709 --> 00:03:30,840
So, Shauna, I was wondering, maybe we
spend the night at your place, tonight?
85
00:03:30,841 --> 00:03:32,199
You know, I still haven't been there.
86
00:03:32,200 --> 00:03:35,606
Uh, we can't. I just had the floors
cleaned, and it's kind of a mess.
87
00:03:35,607 --> 00:03:39,362
Hmm, well, you know I don't
mind things a little bit dirty.
88
00:03:39,407 --> 00:03:42,437
Oh, and I just remembered,
the water's also been shut off.
89
00:03:42,605 --> 00:03:44,941
Well, maybe we should
call somebody to fix it?
90
00:03:44,942 --> 00:03:47,402
I hear Anderson Cooper's good with pipes...
91
00:03:48,152 --> 00:03:49,970
You know, Shauna, if I
didn't know any better,
92
00:03:49,971 --> 00:03:51,748
I'd think you were trying
to hide something from me?
93
00:03:52,033 --> 00:03:55,748
I'll tell you what. How about
we hide something later...
94
00:03:56,288 --> 00:03:57,389
See you tonight?
95
00:04:00,180 --> 00:04:02,649
Oh, she's got good hiding places.
96
00:04:07,955 --> 00:04:08,989
(Beeping)
97
00:04:09,103 --> 00:04:10,805
(Gasps) That's the landlord!
98
00:04:10,806 --> 00:04:11,974
He's on his way up.
99
00:04:11,975 --> 00:04:14,444
My pierogies are hot and ready.
100
00:04:15,697 --> 00:04:16,950
So are mine.
101
00:04:19,192 --> 00:04:21,695
Wow! You look amazing.
102
00:04:21,731 --> 00:04:24,670
But, um, I think you're a little lopsided.
103
00:04:24,734 --> 00:04:25,768
Oh, well, you know,
104
00:04:25,769 --> 00:04:28,131
we ran out of toilet paper before
I could finish stuffing lefty.
105
00:04:28,132 --> 00:04:28,794
Huh.
106
00:04:29,446 --> 00:04:31,315
So uh, how'd you get him up here, so fast?
107
00:04:31,316 --> 00:04:34,219
Oh, well, I told him the sink was clogged.
108
00:04:34,220 --> 00:04:35,886
(In a sexy voice) From
all of our pillow fights.
109
00:04:35,887 --> 00:04:39,091
(Laughs) Great, great.
110
00:04:39,092 --> 00:04:41,135
Um, I only ask you this because I know you.
111
00:04:41,136 --> 00:04:42,654
Did you remember to clog the sink?
112
00:04:44,869 --> 00:04:47,413
Oh, quick! Put a little of
your bigger boobie in there!
113
00:04:47,909 --> 00:04:48,774
(Knocking)
114
00:04:48,775 --> 00:04:49,903
- Ah!
- That's him.
115
00:04:49,904 --> 00:04:51,472
Hurry, hurry, hurry!
116
00:04:52,047 --> 00:04:53,082
Come in.
117
00:04:53,488 --> 00:04:55,923
Hello, girls. Which sink is clogged?
118
00:04:58,187 --> 00:05:02,527
I think it may have gotten clogged while
I was making my world famous pierogies.
119
00:05:03,926 --> 00:05:05,094
Do you want one?
120
00:05:05,094 --> 00:05:06,336
No.
121
00:05:08,964 --> 00:05:10,265
(Grunts)
122
00:05:10,265 --> 00:05:11,266
Sink fixed. I go now.
123
00:05:11,266 --> 00:05:13,135
Wait! Um...
124
00:05:13,135 --> 00:05:16,805
We heard that apartment 2B opened up?
125
00:05:19,212 --> 00:05:20,736
Everyone wants 2B.
126
00:05:20,737 --> 00:05:23,899
Girl in 4A offered to do
disgusting things for 2B.
127
00:05:24,987 --> 00:05:26,822
And she's got two D??�s.
128
00:05:27,585 --> 00:05:31,589
Just because I lost wife they
think they can sex me for apartment.
129
00:05:31,590 --> 00:05:34,560
Oh, that is pathetic.
130
00:05:35,180 --> 00:05:36,442
I have allergies.
131
00:05:38,280 --> 00:05:39,613
I go now.
132
00:05:40,452 --> 00:05:41,453
Oh.
133
00:05:41,454 --> 00:05:43,189
Or, maybe I stay.
134
00:05:43,971 --> 00:05:46,941
Hey, girls. Josh was getting
busy with the anchorwoman.
135
00:05:46,942 --> 00:05:50,212
And the buzzin' I heard was
not from the news chopper.
136
00:05:51,917 --> 00:05:54,753
So, is-is it cool if I
watch Law & Order here?
137
00:05:54,753 --> 00:05:57,389
I... I love the Law & Order.
138
00:05:58,665 --> 00:05:59,856
And my wife's dead.
139
00:06:01,769 --> 00:06:05,906
Well, great, come on in,
sit down, both of you!
140
00:06:05,906 --> 00:06:09,977
Yeah, what goes better with the
Law & Order than the pierogies?
141
00:06:11,347 --> 00:06:13,015
Maybe a white Russian?
142
00:06:21,357 --> 00:06:24,114
Okay, if anybody asks,
you're here to borrow my car.
143
00:06:24,115 --> 00:06:25,132
Oh, really?
144
00:06:25,133 --> 00:06:27,514
I shouldn't say that I'm here to
trick Yolanda into dating our landlord
145
00:06:27,515 --> 00:06:29,183
so we can get that apartment?
146
00:06:29,184 --> 00:06:30,314
You know, hopefully,
147
00:06:30,315 --> 00:06:33,337
you can keep your sarcasm
in our new walk-in closet.
148
00:06:34,253 --> 00:06:35,402
I just really want this.
149
00:06:35,403 --> 00:06:36,846
I have two bedroom fever.
150
00:06:38,301 --> 00:06:39,840
- Hey, Yolanda.
- Hey, girls.
151
00:06:39,841 --> 00:06:41,566
Nothing, I'm just here to borrow her car.
152
00:06:43,160 --> 00:06:45,860
So, how's it, ah, how's
it going with Coleman?
153
00:06:45,861 --> 00:06:47,992
Ah, do you still want him
to walk in front of a bus?
154
00:06:47,993 --> 00:06:49,682
Oh, no, honey.
155
00:06:50,018 --> 00:06:51,467
I wanna push him in front of one.
156
00:06:52,374 --> 00:06:55,474
Um, well, you know, I-I
actually just had an idea.
157
00:06:55,575 --> 00:06:56,674
Just now.
158
00:06:56,675 --> 00:06:59,417
Um, I feel like Coleman needs
a taste of his own medicine.
159
00:06:59,418 --> 00:07:01,613
Maybe you should go out with
another guy and make him jealous?
160
00:07:01,614 --> 00:07:03,744
That's a great idea,
Gabi. That'll teach him.
161
00:07:06,820 --> 00:07:09,403
It would teach him. Only one problem.
162
00:07:09,404 --> 00:07:11,660
If I knew a guy, I
wouldn't date my ex-husband.
163
00:07:11,824 --> 00:07:14,382
Well, I just had another idea.
164
00:07:14,383 --> 00:07:15,444
Just now.
165
00:07:15,862 --> 00:07:18,463
Um, what about Dmitri?
166
00:07:18,549 --> 00:07:21,001
Another great idea, Gabi!
167
00:07:22,450 --> 00:07:23,928
Ooh...
168
00:07:23,929 --> 00:07:27,899
Your sexy Russian
landlord? That guy is fine.
169
00:07:27,900 --> 00:07:29,674
Um, you think you two can...
170
00:07:29,675 --> 00:07:31,897
Sanfran Cafe 8:00 pm. Don't be late.
171
00:07:37,248 --> 00:07:40,768
Oh, how was your run, mate?
Would you like a spot o' brekkie?
172
00:07:41,292 --> 00:07:44,458
I Googled Australian slang. I'm a delight.
173
00:07:45,323 --> 00:07:46,977
Can I have a cuppa?
174
00:07:47,089 --> 00:07:50,020
Er, that means "cup of tea."
175
00:07:50,021 --> 00:07:52,891
Oh, right, sorry. I
didn't make it to the C's.
176
00:07:53,261 --> 00:07:56,531
- Gabi, you seem close with Josh.
- Why, what'd he tell you?
177
00:07:56,924 --> 00:07:59,660
I mean, I'm just kidding. We're close.
178
00:07:59,929 --> 00:08:01,464
Can I ask you a question?
179
00:08:01,758 --> 00:08:03,259
A questie?
180
00:08:03,934 --> 00:08:07,471
Do you think it's wrong to keep a secret
from someone just for a little while
181
00:08:07,471 --> 00:08:08,972
with only good intentions, of course.
182
00:08:08,972 --> 00:08:13,410
Well, between you and me, I don't
even need the good intentions part.
183
00:08:13,410 --> 00:08:15,012
Yeah, you are a delight.
184
00:08:15,012 --> 00:08:16,914
So, what's the secret?
185
00:08:17,781 --> 00:08:19,399
I'm a mum.
186
00:08:19,737 --> 00:08:21,618
What? You are?
187
00:08:21,618 --> 00:08:24,086
I share custody of my
seven-year-old son, Brett.
188
00:08:24,087 --> 00:08:26,336
And, I'm afraid to tell Josh.
189
00:08:26,337 --> 00:08:28,212
That's why I've been acting so dodgy.
190
00:08:28,553 --> 00:08:31,853
"Dodgy." That's a good one.
191
00:08:31,854 --> 00:08:34,814
Um, well, listen, about Josh, I don't
think you have anything to worry about.
192
00:08:34,815 --> 00:08:36,451
Josh loves little guys.
193
00:08:36,452 --> 00:08:37,453
You've met Elliot?
194
00:08:38,994 --> 00:08:40,796
You're right, Gabi.
195
00:08:41,227 --> 00:08:44,330
Now I just need to find
the right time to tell him.
196
00:08:44,531 --> 00:08:47,701
Why don't you tell him after brekkie,
197
00:08:47,702 --> 00:08:49,459
when he's had a cuppa,
198
00:08:49,460 --> 00:08:51,655
unless you think that's too dodgy.
199
00:08:51,656 --> 00:08:53,124
G'day!
200
00:08:58,878 --> 00:09:02,181
Josh, I did something bad.
201
00:09:02,967 --> 00:09:05,169
I got Anderson Cooper's phone number.
202
00:09:05,170 --> 00:09:06,575
Why is that bad?
203
00:09:06,576 --> 00:09:07,977
I stole Shauna's phone to get it.
204
00:09:07,977 --> 00:09:10,847
- Elliot!
- Oh, it gets worse.
205
00:09:10,847 --> 00:09:12,744
In the midst of my mischief making,
206
00:09:12,745 --> 00:09:15,081
I discovered Shauna is cheating on you.
207
00:09:15,869 --> 00:09:17,237
What are you talking about?
208
00:09:17,743 --> 00:09:20,063
I stumbled upon a few texts she sent
209
00:09:20,064 --> 00:09:22,266
to some manwhore named Brett.
210
00:09:22,892 --> 00:09:24,576
You're being ridiculous,
211
00:09:24,577 --> 00:09:26,373
and you invaded her privacy!
212
00:09:27,177 --> 00:09:28,579
Read 'em to me.
213
00:09:29,729 --> 00:09:31,433
"I miss kissing your face."
214
00:09:31,933 --> 00:09:33,335
That's not so bad.
215
00:09:33,336 --> 00:09:35,561
"Can't wait to crawl into
bed with you tonight."
216
00:09:35,562 --> 00:09:36,796
Getting worse.
217
00:09:37,365 --> 00:09:40,401
"Bought a bunch of new toys
we can play with together."
218
00:09:41,785 --> 00:09:43,286
Oh, God.
219
00:09:43,554 --> 00:09:45,356
She bought us toys to play with, too.
220
00:09:50,492 --> 00:09:52,494
Oh my God, they got towel warmers on sale.
221
00:09:52,495 --> 00:09:53,309
Should I get one?
222
00:09:53,310 --> 00:09:55,583
No. Get two. One for each bathroom!
223
00:09:56,928 --> 00:09:59,027
You know what, we're getting
too excited about this.
224
00:09:59,028 --> 00:10:00,997
We don't even know how Dmitri
and Yolanda's date went.
225
00:10:00,998 --> 00:10:02,759
But, they left on their
date three hours ago.
226
00:10:02,760 --> 00:10:04,595
Can I at least just add to cart?
227
00:10:04,835 --> 00:10:06,526
Man, we are obsessing over this.
228
00:10:06,527 --> 00:10:08,895
We gotta find something that's
gonna take our mind of the apartment.
229
00:10:09,956 --> 00:10:12,459
Apartment. Huh. What apartment?
230
00:10:12,460 --> 00:10:13,546
Oh my God, it's not working.
231
00:10:13,547 --> 00:10:14,928
- We have to go over there!
- Okay.
232
00:10:16,518 --> 00:10:18,622
- Oh, girls.
- Oh, Dmitri.
233
00:10:18,747 --> 00:10:19,815
How did your date go?
234
00:10:20,693 --> 00:10:22,729
This is first date I've been on.
235
00:10:22,773 --> 00:10:24,274
Well, since wife dead.
236
00:10:25,240 --> 00:10:26,708
I thought it never happen,
237
00:10:26,709 --> 00:10:28,987
- but I'm in love!
- He's in love!
238
00:10:29,255 --> 00:10:31,141
Yolanda is bee's knees!
239
00:10:31,142 --> 00:10:35,346
Yeah. She is totally bee's knees.
240
00:10:35,757 --> 00:10:38,713
So, do you remember that one time
241
00:10:38,714 --> 00:10:40,983
where you said that you owe me? Well, I do.
242
00:10:41,057 --> 00:10:42,582
Um, I was just wondering,
243
00:10:42,583 --> 00:10:44,500
ah ha, if maybe this could possibly...
244
00:10:44,501 --> 00:10:45,903
- We want apartment 2B!
- Yeah.
245
00:10:46,354 --> 00:10:49,147
Girls, you scratch my
back, I scratch yours...
246
00:10:49,148 --> 00:10:50,741
With two-bedroom apartment!
247
00:10:50,742 --> 00:10:53,345
- Yay!
- Thank you!
248
00:10:53,445 --> 00:10:56,956
I-I've not been so happy
since release from labor camp.
249
00:10:57,640 --> 00:10:59,536
Thank you, thank you.
250
00:10:59,537 --> 00:11:01,236
I bring you lease on Monday.
251
00:11:01,237 --> 00:11:02,255
Okay.
252
00:11:04,664 --> 00:11:06,666
We got the apartment!
253
00:11:08,539 --> 00:11:11,845
Shauna, there's something
I wanna talk to you about.
254
00:11:11,846 --> 00:11:14,015
Isn't talk what we do after sex?
255
00:11:15,775 --> 00:11:17,210
Well, tonight, we're talking before.
256
00:11:19,157 --> 00:11:20,625
I know about Brett.
257
00:11:21,251 --> 00:11:23,564
Oh my God, how'd you find out?
258
00:11:24,192 --> 00:11:26,895
That doesn't matter, Josh.
I swear I was gonna tell you.
259
00:11:27,232 --> 00:11:29,134
But, you didn't.
260
00:11:29,233 --> 00:11:32,937
I was holding back because
I'm crazy about you.
261
00:11:32,938 --> 00:11:33,810
Are ya?
262
00:11:34,686 --> 00:11:36,012
Yes.
263
00:11:36,161 --> 00:11:38,450
That's why I would love
for you to meet him.
264
00:11:41,045 --> 00:11:43,514
Meet him? Brett?
265
00:11:43,514 --> 00:11:45,588
Why... why?
266
00:11:46,351 --> 00:11:49,520
Because you're the two men in my life.
267
00:11:49,520 --> 00:11:53,096
How would you feel if the three
of us had a little playdate?
268
00:11:57,228 --> 00:11:58,263
A play what now?
269
00:11:59,920 --> 00:12:01,121
Uh, okay.
270
00:12:01,122 --> 00:12:05,460
You want Brett to come here.
271
00:12:06,756 --> 00:12:09,025
And play with me and you?
272
00:12:09,307 --> 00:12:11,254
All of us together.
273
00:12:11,278 --> 00:12:14,114
Together... wow, together...
274
00:12:14,445 --> 00:12:16,501
Look, Josh, I know this
is a lot to take in.
275
00:12:16,502 --> 00:12:20,840
But, if you're not into it, it's... I'm
sorry, it's kind of a deal-breaker for me.
276
00:12:21,136 --> 00:12:23,610
Deal-breaker... wow.
277
00:12:24,503 --> 00:12:26,171
Deal-breaker.
278
00:12:26,172 --> 00:12:27,340
(Phone beeps)
279
00:12:28,232 --> 00:12:31,268
Ugh, it's work. I gotta
get down to the studio.
280
00:12:31,269 --> 00:12:34,139
A man in Arkansas proposed
to Siri, and she said yes!
281
00:12:35,947 --> 00:12:38,116
I'm sorry. I have to run.
282
00:12:38,703 --> 00:12:41,873
But, what do you say? I can
bring Brett here tomorrow night?
283
00:12:43,284 --> 00:12:46,788
Okay, honestly, I'm a
little nervous about this.
284
00:12:46,788 --> 00:12:48,008
Don't be.
285
00:12:48,446 --> 00:12:51,515
The three of us are gonna
have so much fun together!
286
00:12:53,656 --> 00:12:56,992
Now rest up. Brett can really wear you out.
287
00:13:01,932 --> 00:13:04,668
Josh, is there any furniture
that you don't need in here?
288
00:13:04,668 --> 00:13:08,939
Because I am signing the lease on my new
two-bedroom apartment tomorrow... whoa.
289
00:13:10,607 --> 00:13:12,377
What's going on with you?
290
00:13:12,586 --> 00:13:15,323
You will never believe the bomb
that Shauna dropped on me last night.
291
00:13:15,324 --> 00:13:17,360
Oh, did she finally tell you about Brett?
292
00:13:17,648 --> 00:13:20,089
Yeah! How do you know about Brett?
293
00:13:20,090 --> 00:13:22,698
Calm down, okay? It's not that big a deal.
294
00:13:23,053 --> 00:13:24,701
Maybe not for some guys.
295
00:13:24,702 --> 00:13:25,827
You are not some guys.
296
00:13:25,828 --> 00:13:28,777
You're not gonna freak out at the first
curveball your relationship throws you.
297
00:13:29,209 --> 00:13:33,079
I'm fine with the curves. It's
the balls I'm worried about.
298
00:13:33,905 --> 00:13:36,942
Gabi, the date was perfect!
299
00:13:36,943 --> 00:13:39,585
It ended with sex on the kitchen floor.
300
00:13:40,021 --> 00:13:41,193
Oh...
301
00:13:41,194 --> 00:13:43,162
Dmitri must have some moves.
302
00:13:43,163 --> 00:13:45,199
Did he have you on your bee's knees?
303
00:13:47,195 --> 00:13:49,633
Dmitri? I'm talking about Coleman.
304
00:13:49,634 --> 00:13:52,226
Your plan to make him jealous worked.
305
00:13:52,227 --> 00:13:54,270
- Girl, I'm moving back in.
- No!
306
00:13:54,271 --> 00:13:58,839
That's awful... ly fast
for you to forgive him.
307
00:14:00,066 --> 00:14:02,716
You, ah, you have to go on
another date with Dmitri.
308
00:14:02,855 --> 00:14:05,122
- Why would I do that?
- Because of the lease...
309
00:14:05,123 --> 00:14:09,291
Uh, it's the "lease" you could do
310
00:14:09,292 --> 00:14:11,928
to keep him super jealous.
311
00:14:13,455 --> 00:14:17,398
Gabi, I know you're not used
to one of your plans working,
312
00:14:18,655 --> 00:14:20,536
but this is the part
where you should be happy!
313
00:14:20,537 --> 00:14:23,171
Yeah, oh-oh, oh, yeah, I'm
tot... I'm totally happy.
314
00:14:23,172 --> 00:14:26,196
Hey, quick question. Can I interest you
315
00:14:26,196 --> 00:14:29,456
in some slightly used towel warmers?
316
00:14:33,737 --> 00:14:35,372
Yolanda's back with Coleman?
317
00:14:35,372 --> 00:14:37,374
Oh my God, Dmitri's gonna find out.
318
00:14:37,374 --> 00:14:40,377
We're not gonna get that apartment
and Mrs. Jacobsen died for nothing.
319
00:14:41,273 --> 00:14:43,542
Stop, okay, listen. We can still save this.
320
00:14:43,543 --> 00:14:46,024
We just have to make sure that
Dmitri doesn't call Yolanda
321
00:14:46,025 --> 00:14:48,360
until after we sign the
lease tomorrow morning.
322
00:14:48,361 --> 00:14:50,960
Stop it, okay. What's the point? It's over.
323
00:14:50,961 --> 00:14:54,531
I'm just gonna go take one last
look and kiss Gaston goodbye.
324
00:14:54,532 --> 00:14:55,931
Uh, who-who is Gaston?
325
00:14:56,084 --> 00:14:57,686
The dishwasher.
326
00:14:59,115 --> 00:15:00,149
I named him.
327
00:15:03,153 --> 00:15:04,659
Blonde one!
328
00:15:05,354 --> 00:15:07,056
I need advice.
329
00:15:07,081 --> 00:15:11,083
Should I invite Yolanda for wine
and spa experience in the Napa?
330
00:15:12,520 --> 00:15:13,988
I have Groupon.
331
00:15:13,989 --> 00:15:16,001
Listen, Dmitri, I have
to tell you something.
332
00:15:16,061 --> 00:15:17,992
Ah, Yolanda doesn't like you.
333
00:15:17,993 --> 00:15:19,261
There are jets in the bathtub!
334
00:15:19,262 --> 00:15:20,842
- She loves you.
- Oh!
335
00:15:20,843 --> 00:15:23,159
- Really?
- Uh, yes.
336
00:15:23,160 --> 00:15:24,840
But, we were sworn to secrecy.
337
00:15:24,841 --> 00:15:26,822
So, you can't tell her
that I told you, okay?
338
00:15:26,823 --> 00:15:29,887
Just... you know, just don't... actually,
you know what, don't talk to her at all.
339
00:15:29,888 --> 00:15:32,706
What? Why-why I no talk if she's in love?
340
00:15:32,707 --> 00:15:36,645
Uh, be-because in America you have to
wait three days before calling a woman.
341
00:15:36,646 --> 00:15:38,381
Otherwise you look needy.
342
00:15:39,469 --> 00:15:41,044
But, but I don't want to wait.
343
00:15:41,045 --> 00:15:42,313
In Russia, we have saying,
344
00:15:42,314 --> 00:15:44,145
"you snooze, you freeze to death."
345
00:15:46,442 --> 00:15:49,178
Well, we live in America.
346
00:15:49,215 --> 00:15:52,362
So, if you want Yolanda
to think you're a man,
347
00:15:52,363 --> 00:15:54,698
you know, just don't call
her until after Monday.
348
00:15:55,113 --> 00:15:57,181
You Americans so confusing.
349
00:15:57,182 --> 00:15:59,454
With my first wife, I ask her to marry me,
350
00:15:59,455 --> 00:16:01,554
she say "eh." Next morning we married.
351
00:16:06,639 --> 00:16:08,785
Okay. Here we go.
352
00:16:09,474 --> 00:16:11,643
Bill & Ted's Sexcellent Adventure.
353
00:16:12,411 --> 00:16:14,739
Let's see what this whole two
guys one girl stuff is about.
354
00:16:14,739 --> 00:16:16,347
Maybe it's not so bad.
355
00:16:16,453 --> 00:16:18,232
(Seductive guitar music plays)
356
00:16:18,320 --> 00:16:21,997
Mmm... uh-uh-uh, it is bad.
357
00:16:26,394 --> 00:16:27,959
Eww, what's that girl doing in there?
358
00:16:30,008 --> 00:16:32,511
Remember Brett? Guy
Shauna's cheating on me with?
359
00:16:32,511 --> 00:16:34,646
They're on their way over here
to have a threesome with me.
360
00:16:34,646 --> 00:16:35,865
Really?
361
00:16:35,872 --> 00:16:38,478
Well, as your publicist,
I think that's a bad idea.
362
00:16:38,479 --> 00:16:41,648
But, as your friend, you go, girl.
363
00:16:41,804 --> 00:16:44,641
Look, I only said yes
because Shauna's so cool.
364
00:16:44,642 --> 00:16:45,910
I didn't want to seem uncool,
365
00:16:45,911 --> 00:16:48,246
but I am uncool, Elliot.
I am uncool in that way.
366
00:16:48,247 --> 00:16:50,196
In every other way, I am cool.
367
00:16:50,197 --> 00:16:52,547
Josh, pull yourself together.
368
00:16:52,548 --> 00:16:53,672
(Doorbell rings)
369
00:16:53,673 --> 00:16:54,965
That's them. Okay, look.
370
00:16:54,966 --> 00:16:57,348
Go out there and tell
them I can't do this, okay?
371
00:16:57,349 --> 00:16:58,986
- Just go... it's too hard.
- Too hard.
372
00:16:58,987 --> 00:17:00,092
No, I...
373
00:17:00,305 --> 00:17:03,074
don't say that. Uh, I gotta back out.
374
00:17:03,075 --> 00:17:04,143
Back out.
375
00:17:04,144 --> 00:17:05,679
That's even... Elliot!
376
00:17:06,307 --> 00:17:08,843
I'm working. You go out and there
and you tell them I'm working.
377
00:17:12,077 --> 00:17:14,817
Hey, Elliot, meet my son, Brett.
378
00:17:14,818 --> 00:17:16,004
This is Brett?
379
00:17:16,030 --> 00:17:18,866
And there's one of your new toys.
380
00:17:18,866 --> 00:17:21,202
Well, this is gonna be funny.
381
00:17:26,438 --> 00:17:27,605
Are they gone?
382
00:17:28,349 --> 00:17:30,885
Sorry, Josh, but you should go out there.
383
00:17:30,897 --> 00:17:32,298
Brett is cute.
384
00:17:32,299 --> 00:17:33,567
Might even be cuter than you.
385
00:17:33,568 --> 00:17:35,515
See, that's the problem!
386
00:17:35,516 --> 00:17:38,140
Either I'm gonna be second banana,
or he's gonna be second banana.
387
00:17:38,141 --> 00:17:39,976
Either way, it's too many bananas!
388
00:17:40,206 --> 00:17:41,812
Well, tell them yourself.
389
00:17:41,813 --> 00:17:43,150
But, be nice.
390
00:17:43,186 --> 00:17:45,931
I get the sense that if you hurt
his feelings, Brett might cry.
391
00:17:46,244 --> 00:17:47,469
Been there.
392
00:17:51,804 --> 00:17:53,873
Hi, Josh. I want you to meet...
393
00:17:53,874 --> 00:17:55,175
Shauna...
394
00:17:55,230 --> 00:17:57,003
I'm-I'm sorry. I can't do this.
395
00:17:57,004 --> 00:17:58,446
This is my son, Brett.
396
00:17:58,447 --> 00:17:59,802
The other man in my life.
397
00:17:59,803 --> 00:18:01,783
Brett, this is Josh.
398
00:18:01,990 --> 00:18:03,777
Hi, Josh. Do you want to see my truck?
399
00:18:05,702 --> 00:18:08,204
Oh, Brett!
400
00:18:08,479 --> 00:18:10,682
You are an adorable little man!
401
00:18:10,776 --> 00:18:12,744
I'm gonna buy you a real truck.
402
00:18:15,785 --> 00:18:17,391
Okay, everything's ready.
403
00:18:17,392 --> 00:18:19,372
Pens ready to sign, champagne ready to pop.
404
00:18:19,373 --> 00:18:21,353
Well, the only thing missing
is Dmitri with the lease,
405
00:18:21,354 --> 00:18:22,919
and he said he'd be here at 9:00.
406
00:18:22,920 --> 00:18:25,055
Relax, it's only 9:02.
407
00:18:25,528 --> 00:18:29,176
That is two extra minutes we could
have been renting that apartment.
408
00:18:30,275 --> 00:18:31,576
(Knocking)
409
00:18:31,577 --> 00:18:32,978
Oh my God, that's him.
410
00:18:35,157 --> 00:18:37,093
Both: Hey, Dmitri!
411
00:18:37,093 --> 00:18:38,861
What are you doing here? Oh, right!
412
00:18:38,861 --> 00:18:40,196
You're here to help us sign the lease.
413
00:18:40,197 --> 00:18:42,083
(Both laugh) Right.
414
00:18:42,121 --> 00:18:43,156
Give it.
415
00:18:44,066 --> 00:18:45,739
So, ah, which pen should I use?
416
00:18:45,740 --> 00:18:48,204
I'm thinking a ball point,
roller ball, scented marker,
417
00:18:48,204 --> 00:18:49,446
glitter pen, ooh, a chopstick!
418
00:18:49,447 --> 00:18:50,689
(Gasps) My EpiPen!
419
00:18:51,682 --> 00:18:52,683
No pen!
420
00:18:54,477 --> 00:18:57,233
Because it's a Russian
custom to sign in blood?
421
00:18:57,234 --> 00:18:59,203
Because we are fine with that.
422
00:19:00,616 --> 00:19:03,152
Are you fine? Because Dmitri not so fine.
423
00:19:03,152 --> 00:19:06,189
You tell me not to call Yoyoski, I no call.
424
00:19:06,190 --> 00:19:08,027
But I am passionate
man, so I go to her house
425
00:19:08,028 --> 00:19:10,359
bearing gifts of vodka and smoked salmon.
426
00:19:12,918 --> 00:19:14,787
- Uh-oh.
- Oh, boy.
427
00:19:14,788 --> 00:19:17,057
And she get in huge fight with boyfriend.
428
00:19:17,446 --> 00:19:19,093
- Oh, boy.
- Uh-oh.
429
00:19:19,094 --> 00:19:21,752
All the way home I thinking
why would girls lie to me?
430
00:19:21,753 --> 00:19:24,801
And then, it hit me like a ton of brick.
431
00:19:25,208 --> 00:19:27,490
You manipulate me to get apartment!
432
00:19:27,491 --> 00:19:28,534
You bad girls!
433
00:19:28,535 --> 00:19:31,635
No, listen, Dmitri, we're
really, really sorry.
434
00:19:31,636 --> 00:19:33,360
Yes, please let us make it up to you.
435
00:19:33,361 --> 00:19:34,798
No. No apartment for you!
436
00:19:34,799 --> 00:19:36,601
- (Gasps)
- I give to someone else.
437
00:19:36,602 --> 00:19:37,770
Someone who deserve it.
438
00:19:37,771 --> 00:19:39,606
What? No! Who?
439
00:19:39,607 --> 00:19:41,476
Hey!
440
00:19:43,306 --> 00:19:44,708
Got a pen?
441
00:19:48,608 --> 00:19:52,608
Now that was the best I'm
sorry calamari I've ever had.
442
00:19:53,128 --> 00:19:55,197
So, you forgive us for
totally screwing up your life?
443
00:19:55,198 --> 00:19:57,967
Well, in a way, you two
girls did me a favor.
444
00:19:57,968 --> 00:20:00,237
Coleman got so mad about Dmitri,
445
00:20:00,244 --> 00:20:04,148
he wound up admitting he
did cheat with the waitress.
446
00:20:04,638 --> 00:20:06,429
And his hairdresser.
447
00:20:06,875 --> 00:20:08,395
And the dog walker.
448
00:20:09,048 --> 00:20:10,349
We don't even have a dog!
449
00:20:11,387 --> 00:20:12,489
Ha!
450
00:20:12,490 --> 00:20:15,646
Okay, so what are we watching for
our first movie night, neighbor?
451
00:20:15,647 --> 00:20:18,840
I grabbed it from Josh's
office. It's a classic.
452
00:20:18,841 --> 00:20:21,410
Bill & Ted's Excellent Adventure.
453
00:20:22,987 --> 00:20:24,889
(Seductive guitar music plays)
454
00:20:27,723 --> 00:20:29,324
I didn't know Keanu was black.
455
00:20:31,954 --> 00:20:33,122
Why is everybody naked?
456
00:20:34,190 --> 00:20:36,125
They are really steaming
up that phone booth.
457
00:20:38,094 --> 00:20:39,428
Gimme that remote.
458
00:20:41,063 --> 00:20:42,498
I gotta turn this up.
459
00:20:42,498 --> 00:20:44,133
(Laughing)
460
00:20:44,133 --> 00:20:46,784
(In Russian accent) We are bad girls!
461
00:20:46,784 --> 00:20:47,913
Sync & corrections by PetaG
- www.addic7ed.com -
462
00:20:47,963 --> 00:20:52,513
Repair and Synchronization by
Easy Subtitles Synchronizer 1.0.0.0
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