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Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:01,195 --> 00:00:04,097 Hi. I'm comedian Tom Green with a special one-time offer. 2 00:00:04,124 --> 00:00:05,449 Say yes now and receive a case 3 00:00:05,480 --> 00:00:07,991 of premium Canadian sausage for only $39.99. 4 00:00:08,015 --> 00:00:09,577 Daddy, would you like some sausage? 5 00:00:09,621 --> 00:00:11,535 - Yes. - Magnificent. 6 00:00:11,554 --> 00:00:14,349 Now please enter your credit card info using your touch-tone phone. 7 00:00:14,984 --> 00:00:16,455 And there you have it. 8 00:00:16,486 --> 00:00:20,347 Telecom intelligence negotiating algorithm, or "Tina," 9 00:00:20,380 --> 00:00:24,130 gives callers two offers in a variety of celebrity voices, 10 00:00:24,149 --> 00:00:25,261 as you just heard. 11 00:00:25,284 --> 00:00:28,155 Tom Green? You should have got Scott Caan. 12 00:00:28,176 --> 00:00:30,154 - Shut up, he's a huge celebrity. - Whoa, watch it. Yeah. 13 00:00:30,172 --> 00:00:31,927 Someone needs to put a muzzle on him, 14 00:00:31,946 --> 00:00:34,279 - 'cause I hate you. - Uh, real question. 15 00:00:34,296 --> 00:00:37,780 If Tina is making the calls, why are we here? 16 00:00:37,811 --> 00:00:41,028 Well, if Tina doesn't make the sale within the first two offers, then... 17 00:00:41,053 --> 00:00:42,241 Oh, I get it. 18 00:00:42,277 --> 00:00:44,062 Then we come in and clean bat up. 19 00:00:44,174 --> 00:00:47,920 'Cause this cold machine lacks the soft touch of a human... 20 00:00:48,220 --> 00:00:50,868 touching a machine. 21 00:00:51,191 --> 00:00:52,959 It lacks human error. 22 00:00:52,984 --> 00:00:56,661 And Tina persists where you would feel intrusive. 23 00:00:56,691 --> 00:00:59,282 Okay, so what's the catch? 24 00:00:59,313 --> 00:01:02,389 Well, if Tina does make the sale 25 00:01:02,413 --> 00:01:04,776 before your assistance is needed, 26 00:01:04,932 --> 00:01:06,313 you don't get the commission. 27 00:01:06,331 --> 00:01:07,785 - Just your hourly. - What? 28 00:01:07,812 --> 00:01:09,096 Is this a joke? 29 00:01:09,120 --> 00:01:10,863 Uh, you know, I-I get it. 30 00:01:10,881 --> 00:01:13,492 Gonna be less work for us, and we're still getting paid hourly. 31 00:01:13,505 --> 00:01:15,101 Exactly, thank you, stretch. 32 00:01:15,149 --> 00:01:17,415 No, you don't get it! 33 00:01:17,839 --> 00:01:19,683 This is just the beginning, guys. 34 00:01:20,052 --> 00:01:22,930 All right, if we let these machines take our jobs, 35 00:01:23,129 --> 00:01:25,978 next... next, they're gonna take everything. 36 00:01:26,009 --> 00:01:28,355 Okay, Blake, you're overreacting. 37 00:01:28,380 --> 00:01:29,628 Overreacting? 38 00:01:29,662 --> 00:01:32,760 I'm pretty sure that I'm underreacting right now. 39 00:01:33,512 --> 00:01:35,627 Just imagine a future... 40 00:01:35,783 --> 00:01:37,747 Where robots replace humans, 41 00:01:37,772 --> 00:01:42,531 evolving to be faster, smarter, and just way more freaking doper. 42 00:01:43,328 --> 00:01:45,075 Where humans become obsolete, 43 00:01:45,099 --> 00:01:47,547 and they're forced by their ruler, Tina, 44 00:01:47,623 --> 00:01:51,725 to undergo a cyborg surgery known as orientation. 45 00:01:51,997 --> 00:01:54,475 And it'll only be a matter of time 46 00:01:54,493 --> 00:01:56,695 before they come for us all. 47 00:02:04,482 --> 00:02:08,482 Sync and correction by Mlmlte www.addic7ed.com Resync for WEB-DL by Norther 48 00:02:09,472 --> 00:02:12,881 Congrats, your bum will soon be on your very own Swedish massage chair. 49 00:02:12,900 --> 00:02:14,315 Now please enter your credit card info 50 00:02:14,327 --> 00:02:15,430 using your touch-tone phone. 51 00:02:15,468 --> 00:02:17,048 - Swedish. - Wow. 52 00:02:17,073 --> 00:02:18,182 Cool. 53 00:02:18,225 --> 00:02:20,205 Another sale stolen by Tina. 54 00:02:20,217 --> 00:02:22,553 And another one of our commission checks stuffed into the pockets 55 00:02:22,578 --> 00:02:25,341 of Tina's real comfortable cyber wranglers. 56 00:02:25,354 --> 00:02:26,524 Oh, yeah, just face it. 57 00:02:26,536 --> 00:02:29,765 Tom Green is Freddy-got- finger-raping us all day. 58 00:02:29,778 --> 00:02:31,832 - Yeah. - Oh, dude, check this out. 59 00:02:32,019 --> 00:02:33,959 Look what I snuck past the last merry maids sweep. 60 00:02:33,989 --> 00:02:35,648 Thank God. 61 00:02:35,779 --> 00:02:38,603 That huff, huff... Huffy white heat. 62 00:02:38,653 --> 00:02:40,998 - Huff! Huff! - Except for it's not hot. 63 00:02:41,016 --> 00:02:43,126 - It's actually very cold, so... - It's cold. 64 00:02:43,207 --> 00:02:44,850 Just be careful with it, all right? 65 00:02:45,600 --> 00:02:46,678 - Pretty cool, I guess. - Yeah. 66 00:02:46,696 --> 00:02:47,921 - Ooh! 67 00:02:47,958 --> 00:02:50,636 - That's crispy. - That's a nimbus cloud in there. 68 00:02:50,655 --> 00:02:52,091 I've actually done so much of this stuff, 69 00:02:52,122 --> 00:02:54,046 I don't even think it really affects my brain anymore. 70 00:02:54,214 --> 00:02:55,871 Is that right? 71 00:02:57,089 --> 00:02:58,358 Hey, but don't hog it all. 72 00:02:58,370 --> 00:02:59,741 I know it's gonna sizzle-fry my brain, 73 00:02:59,766 --> 00:03:01,797 but, I'm sorry, this whole impending doom thing 74 00:03:01,819 --> 00:03:03,366 is really getting to me, so if I could just have 75 00:03:03,391 --> 00:03:05,159 a huff of the hot... uh... The heat? 76 00:03:05,195 --> 00:03:06,645 Well, you know, it's... 77 00:03:06,657 --> 00:03:08,726 Just abandon all hope here. 78 00:03:09,469 --> 00:03:11,641 - What the heck? What'd you do, man? - I didn't do anything. 79 00:03:11,655 --> 00:03:12,729 Mm. 80 00:03:13,361 --> 00:03:15,311 We didn't do anything! 81 00:03:15,336 --> 00:03:17,719 Good. That's the way I like it. 82 00:03:17,741 --> 00:03:19,583 But that's all about to change. 83 00:03:19,811 --> 00:03:22,221 So, you've finally come 84 00:03:22,233 --> 00:03:25,076 to have me slave away in your vagina, 85 00:03:25,105 --> 00:03:26,713 as your sex slave. 86 00:03:26,744 --> 00:03:27,899 That's fine. 87 00:03:28,015 --> 00:03:29,734 I'll have sex with you. 88 00:03:29,795 --> 00:03:32,039 But I will never love you, Alice. 89 00:03:32,281 --> 00:03:33,726 I will never love you! 90 00:03:33,757 --> 00:03:35,663 Step aside, you troll. 91 00:03:35,700 --> 00:03:37,236 Oh, good one: Troll. 92 00:03:37,248 --> 00:03:39,665 - Yeah, right. - I'm here for Blake. 93 00:03:39,700 --> 00:03:41,438 Oh, 'cause of his hair? 'Cause you're into trolls? 94 00:03:41,463 --> 00:03:44,061 No. Because it's time for his orientation. 95 00:03:44,078 --> 00:03:45,080 Oh, fuck, sorry. 96 00:03:45,086 --> 00:03:47,341 Alice, please, I haven't even lived yet, all right? 97 00:03:47,366 --> 00:03:49,981 I didn't even get to try Carl's Jr.'s CrissCut fries. 98 00:03:49,992 --> 00:03:52,678 - Seriously? - Yeah, you know. I'm an onion ring guy. 99 00:03:52,879 --> 00:03:54,314 Montez, Waymond, no! Don't! 100 00:03:54,332 --> 00:03:57,245 - Take me instead! - Yeah, take him instead. 101 00:03:57,269 --> 00:03:59,340 I understand that Tina's what's best for T.A.C. 102 00:03:59,361 --> 00:04:00,695 and I'm ready. 103 00:04:01,032 --> 00:04:02,895 I'm ready to become... 104 00:04:03,198 --> 00:04:04,789 an Oriental. 105 00:04:12,507 --> 00:04:14,751 No! 106 00:04:16,387 --> 00:04:17,710 Sorry. 107 00:04:17,836 --> 00:04:19,207 Strap him to the table. 108 00:04:19,225 --> 00:04:20,889 I can't be a cyborg, man. 109 00:04:20,945 --> 00:04:23,216 They don't even have any cool... they're just idiots. 110 00:04:23,303 --> 00:04:25,693 They just have metal in their brains. 111 00:04:25,722 --> 00:04:28,298 If you had, like, a laser dick, then, yeah, I'd be a cyborg. 112 00:04:28,310 --> 00:04:29,732 But there's nothing enticing me. 113 00:04:29,763 --> 00:04:31,754 Look, this is what we gotta do. We gotta go save Ders 114 00:04:31,773 --> 00:04:33,174 and get the hell outta this hell, all right? 115 00:04:33,205 --> 00:04:34,424 Yeah, where are we gonna go, Blake? 116 00:04:34,437 --> 00:04:35,801 I don't know. Let's freaking feivel it. 117 00:04:35,827 --> 00:04:37,282 - Let's go west. - To the ocean? 118 00:04:37,301 --> 00:04:38,895 Sh-yeah, right. 119 00:04:38,952 --> 00:04:40,243 I'm not an ocean dog, okay? 120 00:04:40,262 --> 00:04:41,646 I'm a city cat. 121 00:04:42,540 --> 00:04:45,039 All right, fine. Let me think of another direction. 122 00:04:46,974 --> 00:04:47,892 - East. - Yes. 123 00:04:47,908 --> 00:04:49,375 Let's head east, to the heartland! 124 00:04:49,406 --> 00:04:50,750 - Yeah. - Vegas. 125 00:04:50,775 --> 00:04:52,469 - Vegas, I love it there! - Right? 126 00:04:52,527 --> 00:04:53,610 There we go. 127 00:04:53,790 --> 00:04:55,175 Now, let's ice our brains down, 128 00:04:55,194 --> 00:04:56,845 and formulate a well-thought-out plan. 129 00:04:56,858 --> 00:04:57,746 Wait a minute. 130 00:04:57,767 --> 00:05:00,406 - What did you just say? - Hmm? 131 00:05:00,425 --> 00:05:01,667 Yes, that's it. 132 00:05:01,691 --> 00:05:03,064 The freeze part, that's what I was thinking. 133 00:05:03,083 --> 00:05:04,874 The freeze part. Dude, you're a genius! 134 00:05:05,649 --> 00:05:06,581 I don't know. 135 00:05:06,610 --> 00:05:07,895 ...using your touch-tone phone. 136 00:05:11,203 --> 00:05:12,119 Yeah. 137 00:05:12,125 --> 00:05:13,588 There we go. 138 00:05:13,622 --> 00:05:14,924 Whoo! Oh! Oh! 139 00:05:14,936 --> 00:05:16,032 - Oh, sorry. - That's okay. 140 00:05:16,054 --> 00:05:18,081 Hey, Adam, what comes after "l"? 141 00:05:18,337 --> 00:05:19,895 - I don't... I... - Bow! 142 00:05:22,231 --> 00:05:23,373 - Oh. - Shiz-off! 143 00:05:23,385 --> 00:05:24,446 - Dude! - Oh, my God! 144 00:05:24,464 --> 00:05:26,790 I'm so excited about this. We could... okay. 145 00:05:26,816 --> 00:05:28,724 - We could die doing this. - Great, let's save Ders. 146 00:05:29,024 --> 00:05:31,160 We could die, this is exciting. 147 00:05:31,417 --> 00:05:33,322 I think we're good now. Ooh! 148 00:05:33,352 --> 00:05:34,871 - Blake! Adam! - Shut up. 149 00:05:34,917 --> 00:05:36,155 - Shh, shh. - We're getting out of here. 150 00:05:36,173 --> 00:05:37,665 Take us with you! Take us with you, man! 151 00:05:37,683 --> 00:05:39,658 - Yeah, save us. - No, sorry, we can't. 152 00:05:39,664 --> 00:05:42,094 Yeah, but, um, we're always gonna remember you, 153 00:05:42,107 --> 00:05:43,571 and we'll never forget you, so... 154 00:05:43,633 --> 00:05:44,984 Take this yo-yo. 155 00:05:45,027 --> 00:05:47,407 It belonged to my father. 156 00:05:47,413 --> 00:05:49,276 Television set. 157 00:05:49,611 --> 00:05:51,032 Give it to your sons. 158 00:05:51,055 --> 00:05:52,546 Very cool. Cool yo-yo. 159 00:05:52,577 --> 00:05:54,840 - Thank you, I'm gonna treasure this. - Don't go. 160 00:05:54,871 --> 00:05:57,032 - Yep. - Guys, please don't leave us, okay? 161 00:05:57,051 --> 00:05:58,738 I cannot survive in here. 162 00:05:58,778 --> 00:06:00,457 All right, I-I love you, Jet Set. 163 00:06:00,469 --> 00:06:02,246 But he shit all over the walls. 164 00:06:02,654 --> 00:06:04,811 - And I can't... this smell... - You pooped on the walls? 165 00:06:04,827 --> 00:06:07,366 - I couldn't hold it no more. - I can smell it now. 166 00:06:09,729 --> 00:06:11,438 I'm sorry, guys, we'll come back for you. 167 00:06:11,463 --> 00:06:12,633 We gotta go. 168 00:06:13,999 --> 00:06:15,943 Oh. 169 00:06:15,974 --> 00:06:17,728 It's okay. 170 00:06:18,156 --> 00:06:20,509 Relax, Holmvik. 171 00:06:21,097 --> 00:06:22,967 Once you've been oriented, 172 00:06:22,979 --> 00:06:25,914 all the fear, the emotions, 173 00:06:26,220 --> 00:06:27,730 they just disappear. 174 00:06:27,911 --> 00:06:29,821 Then why don't you try it? 175 00:06:30,052 --> 00:06:33,916 Because I run Telamericorp, and Tina answers to me. 176 00:06:35,391 --> 00:06:37,001 Prep the patient. 177 00:06:37,407 --> 00:06:38,164 What? 178 00:06:38,189 --> 00:06:39,427 What are you doing? 179 00:06:39,492 --> 00:06:41,756 What? No! Oh, no! 180 00:06:41,780 --> 00:06:43,933 You're changing the molecular structure of my flesh! 181 00:06:44,046 --> 00:06:45,601 Please don't! 182 00:06:45,655 --> 00:06:47,558 No, we're just shaving your body. 183 00:06:47,846 --> 00:06:48,591 Oh. 184 00:06:48,597 --> 00:06:49,568 Okay. 185 00:06:49,646 --> 00:06:50,995 Been there, done that. 186 00:06:51,493 --> 00:06:52,631 Spa day. 187 00:07:03,563 --> 00:07:04,837 {pub}So, once we get to Vegas, 188 00:07:04,862 --> 00:07:06,560 thinking about doing a Cirque Du Soleil show 189 00:07:06,585 --> 00:07:07,667 based on the music of Nelly. 190 00:07:07,679 --> 00:07:09,382 - Wait a minute. - What? 191 00:07:10,110 --> 00:07:12,385 I mean, if Murphy Lee and the St. Lunatics 192 00:07:12,403 --> 00:07:15,336 want to be involved, that's fine. But it's really... it's Nelly's show. 193 00:07:15,693 --> 00:07:17,403 Tina's mainframe. 194 00:07:17,984 --> 00:07:20,045 That's where the lifeblood's generated. 195 00:07:20,057 --> 00:07:22,402 Destroying the mainframe would wipe out the mind control 196 00:07:22,414 --> 00:07:24,334 of everybody who's been oriented-tated. 197 00:07:24,364 --> 00:07:26,114 Very cool. We can't get in there, though, 198 00:07:26,144 --> 00:07:27,842 because we don't have Alice's collar key. 199 00:07:27,860 --> 00:07:29,959 So let's just focus on what I'm saying, okay? 200 00:07:29,984 --> 00:07:31,089 Let's go get Ders. 201 00:07:31,114 --> 00:07:32,828 Do you have air force ones? 'Cause you're gonna need those. 202 00:07:32,853 --> 00:07:35,542 Um, I have G Unit sneakers. 203 00:07:35,572 --> 00:07:38,407 Once ingested, this probe will map your body, 204 00:07:38,441 --> 00:07:40,904 and we can begin the implant process, 205 00:07:40,928 --> 00:07:44,023 orienting you to Tina's mainframe. 206 00:07:49,418 --> 00:07:50,477 Yeah. 207 00:07:50,501 --> 00:07:52,765 Don't worry, you'll pass it soon. 208 00:07:52,790 --> 00:07:53,821 TMI. 209 00:07:53,840 --> 00:07:56,683 Position the optical excavation device. 210 00:07:57,210 --> 00:07:59,708 Time to scoop out them eyeballs, stretch. 211 00:08:03,306 --> 00:08:05,336 No! 212 00:08:06,194 --> 00:08:07,589 No! No, no, no! 213 00:08:07,614 --> 00:08:09,620 Watch eyes! Watch eyes! Waymond, please, please! 214 00:08:09,639 --> 00:08:11,804 I know you can hear me! Tell her to stop! 215 00:08:11,844 --> 00:08:13,672 Don't let her do this! 216 00:08:15,181 --> 00:08:17,882 Good thing yo-yo strings are long as hell in the future. 217 00:08:17,907 --> 00:08:18,905 Whoop! 218 00:08:18,929 --> 00:08:20,967 Just what do you think you're doing? 219 00:08:21,002 --> 00:08:22,068 We're escaping to Vegas. 220 00:08:22,093 --> 00:08:23,819 Unless you want me to be your sex puppet. 221 00:08:23,849 --> 00:08:25,731 Put your hand up my ass, make me talk. 222 00:08:25,749 --> 00:08:27,138 Come on, let's get out of here! Let's go! 223 00:08:27,157 --> 00:08:28,560 Let's move! Let's move! Let's move! 224 00:08:28,910 --> 00:08:30,760 Oh, yeah, and, Alice... 225 00:08:31,200 --> 00:08:33,411 - We quit. - Yeah. 226 00:08:33,442 --> 00:08:34,721 Yeah, we quit. 227 00:08:34,752 --> 00:08:36,623 Come on! Hup! 228 00:08:37,004 --> 00:08:39,091 After them now! 229 00:08:41,996 --> 00:08:43,069 Damn it. 230 00:08:43,088 --> 00:08:45,435 I am not running after them in these heels. 231 00:08:45,565 --> 00:08:46,995 Let's head back to the office. 232 00:08:47,007 --> 00:08:48,790 We'll activate the probe's tracking signal, 233 00:08:48,795 --> 00:08:51,804 and then we'll trigger the defense mech, in case they try to discharge. 234 00:08:51,889 --> 00:08:53,427 Damn it. 235 00:08:53,562 --> 00:08:54,471 What are they talking about? 236 00:08:54,490 --> 00:08:56,485 They fed me this probe thing. 237 00:08:57,618 --> 00:08:59,195 Oh, my God. 238 00:08:59,827 --> 00:09:01,426 I can feel it. Oh. 239 00:09:02,081 --> 00:09:04,045 Oh, God! 240 00:09:04,071 --> 00:09:05,511 It's too late to abort it, 241 00:09:05,628 --> 00:09:07,171 which is exactly what my mom used 242 00:09:07,190 --> 00:09:08,646 to say about me. 243 00:09:08,824 --> 00:09:10,505 I'm gonna have to murder you. I'm gonna have to murder him. 244 00:09:10,524 --> 00:09:11,724 - No, Adam, no... - Wait, wait... 245 00:09:11,748 --> 00:09:13,103 He's not Oriental yet. 246 00:09:13,128 --> 00:09:14,187 Look at his eyes. 247 00:09:14,199 --> 00:09:16,418 You could tell he's Oriental by his eyes. 248 00:09:16,499 --> 00:09:18,327 But we do got to get that probe out of him. 249 00:09:22,056 --> 00:09:23,434 - Oh. - Oh, God. Ooh. 250 00:09:23,669 --> 00:09:25,068 I think I know how to get it out. 251 00:09:25,080 --> 00:09:26,622 - Huh? What? - How? 252 00:09:27,201 --> 00:09:28,648 - What are you... - What are you doing? 253 00:09:28,672 --> 00:09:30,129 - Yeah. - What are you doing? 254 00:09:30,152 --> 00:09:31,707 Tracker on. 255 00:09:31,771 --> 00:09:34,075 Get to the supply closet now! 256 00:09:35,993 --> 00:09:38,164 Defense mech armed. 257 00:09:38,200 --> 00:09:39,796 You hear that? I'm beeping. 258 00:09:39,815 --> 00:09:41,684 - Yeah, get it out, Ders. - Get it out. 259 00:09:41,703 --> 00:09:42,847 - Can you hear it? - Stop playing. 260 00:09:42,866 --> 00:09:44,196 I could kill him, I could still kill him. 261 00:09:44,215 --> 00:09:47,150 Yeah, man, this is an option. 262 00:09:47,507 --> 00:09:48,631 Oh, look. 263 00:09:50,842 --> 00:09:52,404 Oh, my God, it's a tapeworm! 264 00:09:52,428 --> 00:09:54,595 I've had one of those. 17 feet long. 265 00:09:54,626 --> 00:09:56,785 Doctor told me I had to quit eating raw ground beef. 266 00:09:56,828 --> 00:09:58,007 Which I did. 267 00:09:58,099 --> 00:09:58,933 For a while. 268 00:09:58,958 --> 00:10:00,489 It's not a tapeworm! 269 00:10:00,507 --> 00:10:02,308 It's the thing! Obviously. 270 00:10:02,338 --> 00:10:03,642 - Yes, obviously. - Right, totally. 271 00:10:03,666 --> 00:10:05,531 Come over here, and help me get it out. 272 00:10:05,575 --> 00:10:08,103 - Keep pulling it out of your ass. - All right, you're okay. 273 00:10:08,128 --> 00:10:10,462 - I think you... you got this. - All right, uh... 274 00:10:11,849 --> 00:10:14,038 All right, here we go. 275 00:10:14,141 --> 00:10:15,739 - Okay. - Oh, wait, no, no, no. 276 00:10:15,758 --> 00:10:17,525 - Not a pretty view. - Slow down, slow down. 277 00:10:17,544 --> 00:10:18,503 I think something's coming. 278 00:10:18,521 --> 00:10:20,402 Oh, yeah, no, that's it. That's the probe. 279 00:10:20,446 --> 00:10:21,718 I see something. 280 00:10:21,997 --> 00:10:24,091 Yep, yep. Oh, here we go! 281 00:10:24,097 --> 00:10:25,501 We got some lights. 282 00:10:25,548 --> 00:10:27,104 Oh! 283 00:10:27,141 --> 00:10:28,963 - Ooh! - Oh God! 284 00:10:29,049 --> 00:10:30,499 We got it! Destroy it, Adam! 285 00:10:30,512 --> 00:10:31,627 - Destroy it. - Yep. 286 00:10:33,400 --> 00:10:35,183 - Okay. Yeah. - You get it? 287 00:10:35,292 --> 00:10:36,157 No, I hear it. 288 00:10:36,200 --> 00:10:37,291 It's still beeping inside of me. 289 00:10:37,316 --> 00:10:38,997 We're not done, guys, it's still in there! 290 00:10:39,464 --> 00:10:41,039 To the left, hurry! 291 00:10:41,051 --> 00:10:42,555 And bring them back alive. 292 00:10:42,799 --> 00:10:43,886 Barely. 293 00:10:44,180 --> 00:10:45,500 - Yep. - It's still in there. 294 00:10:45,961 --> 00:10:47,289 It's still in there. Okay, okay. 295 00:10:47,314 --> 00:10:48,444 Round two, here we go. 296 00:10:48,476 --> 00:10:50,020 Yeah, no. 297 00:10:50,048 --> 00:10:51,641 - You got it. - Keep it up. 298 00:10:51,659 --> 00:10:53,083 Good work. 299 00:10:53,455 --> 00:10:54,957 Yep, I got it snagged. 300 00:10:59,210 --> 00:11:01,492 - Oh! - Boy! Yikes! 301 00:11:01,651 --> 00:11:04,189 Yes, you're gonna have a case of "the hemmies" after this one. 302 00:11:04,208 --> 00:11:05,251 Fissures and hemmies. 303 00:11:05,263 --> 00:11:06,803 You might never poop again, dude. 304 00:11:06,835 --> 00:11:08,482 Which would suck for me, I love pooping. 305 00:11:08,494 --> 00:11:10,427 It's, like, where I get most of my reading done. 306 00:11:11,299 --> 00:11:13,808 Great. You've got them cornered. 307 00:11:14,369 --> 00:11:15,636 You know what? 308 00:11:15,655 --> 00:11:16,799 Kill 'em. 309 00:11:16,944 --> 00:11:18,286 No, guys... guys, stop! 310 00:11:18,298 --> 00:11:19,405 Stop, okay? 311 00:11:19,436 --> 00:11:21,605 I'll just be a cyborg. Forget it, all right? 312 00:11:21,630 --> 00:11:24,047 Just stop pulling things out of my ass! 313 00:11:24,078 --> 00:11:25,575 Okay, I'll help. 314 00:11:27,765 --> 00:11:29,542 - Oh! - There it is! There it is! 315 00:11:29,716 --> 00:11:31,879 - Oh! Oh! - Break it! Hurry. 316 00:11:32,633 --> 00:11:33,875 Break it and destroy it! 317 00:11:33,927 --> 00:11:35,680 Come on! 318 00:11:35,995 --> 00:11:37,323 Okay, it's indestructible. 319 00:11:37,348 --> 00:11:38,698 Don't we have, like, a steamroller 320 00:11:38,710 --> 00:11:40,156 or, like, lava or... 321 00:11:40,235 --> 00:11:41,712 What do we do? 322 00:11:45,210 --> 00:11:46,642 Wait, what are you doing, you idiots? 323 00:11:46,660 --> 00:11:47,881 Finish them! 324 00:11:48,680 --> 00:11:50,761 They're heading down the South hallway. 325 00:11:50,799 --> 00:11:52,521 They're heading towards my office! 326 00:11:52,734 --> 00:11:53,884 Wait, they're coming for me! 327 00:11:53,890 --> 00:11:55,800 Get here now! 328 00:12:21,273 --> 00:12:23,204 {pub}Damn it! It's Bill. 329 00:12:23,523 --> 00:12:24,540 We're not getting past him. 330 00:12:24,571 --> 00:12:25,765 He's so deadly. Look at him. 331 00:12:25,803 --> 00:12:27,153 Ow! 332 00:12:29,023 --> 00:12:30,567 Um, mirrors. 333 00:12:31,187 --> 00:12:32,920 If we can find several mirrors... 334 00:12:33,061 --> 00:12:35,473 Shh, Adam. Trying to come up with an idea here. 335 00:12:35,510 --> 00:12:36,458 Dude! 336 00:12:36,477 --> 00:12:38,833 Hey, have you guys seen Kill Bill? 337 00:12:39,085 --> 00:12:40,629 Volume one or two? 338 00:12:40,664 --> 00:12:42,111 Volume now. 339 00:12:47,910 --> 00:12:49,210 Aah! 340 00:12:54,982 --> 00:12:55,714 I got him! 341 00:12:55,733 --> 00:12:57,484 - Bill! - No! 342 00:12:57,503 --> 00:12:59,629 - Oh, sheesh. - Ugh. 343 00:12:59,989 --> 00:13:00,862 All right. 344 00:13:00,881 --> 00:13:02,652 Bill! No! 345 00:13:04,328 --> 00:13:06,074 Adam, you can't kill them! 346 00:13:06,098 --> 00:13:08,492 Bill, he's still in there. He's just under mind control. 347 00:13:08,529 --> 00:13:09,541 - Yeah. - Oh, I thought he... 348 00:13:09,575 --> 00:13:10,918 I thought he was like an evil robot. 349 00:13:10,936 --> 00:13:11,912 No! Oh! 350 00:13:11,930 --> 00:13:13,337 You didn't know. He didn't know. 351 00:13:13,349 --> 00:13:16,101 Cyborgs are totally different than evil robots, okay? 352 00:13:16,160 --> 00:13:18,042 - Think of Robocop, right? - Yeah, yeah. 353 00:13:18,061 --> 00:13:20,296 He would have those flashbacks to when he was a man. 354 00:13:20,327 --> 00:13:22,238 Oh, so he's actually... he's half-human. 355 00:13:22,263 --> 00:13:23,610 - Yes, he's still human. - I killed a human! 356 00:13:23,636 --> 00:13:24,972 - You killed a human, dude. - Oh, my gosh. 357 00:13:24,990 --> 00:13:27,243 - Oh, sorry, Bill. - Yeah. 358 00:13:27,353 --> 00:13:29,317 Okay, we hop over the fence. 359 00:13:29,629 --> 00:13:31,265 Hop on a plane, if they still exist, 360 00:13:31,289 --> 00:13:33,554 and be the kings of the Las Vegas strap. 361 00:13:33,572 --> 00:13:35,503 Attention, Jillian and Jet Set, 362 00:13:35,528 --> 00:13:37,520 prepare for orientation. 363 00:13:37,549 --> 00:13:39,010 Your time is now. 364 00:13:39,477 --> 00:13:40,537 Jet and Jill. 365 00:13:40,576 --> 00:13:41,687 You guys, we got to do something. 366 00:13:41,705 --> 00:13:42,901 I know what they're about to go through. 367 00:13:42,932 --> 00:13:43,851 Uh-uh, no. 368 00:13:43,863 --> 00:13:45,701 This is a trap. This is trickery! 369 00:13:45,713 --> 00:13:47,113 This is Tomfoolery! 370 00:13:47,138 --> 00:13:48,242 Let's go to Vegas! 371 00:13:49,320 --> 00:13:50,628 Vegas! 372 00:13:50,672 --> 00:13:54,211 No, don't you see? This isn't just about saving those guys. 373 00:13:54,437 --> 00:13:56,930 It's about taking back Telamericorp. 374 00:13:57,130 --> 00:13:59,623 Reclaiming the company that gave us nothing. 375 00:14:00,116 --> 00:14:03,694 It's a dirty job, but... Somebody's gotta Mike Rowe it. 376 00:14:03,949 --> 00:14:05,364 - Hey, Blake? - Huh? 377 00:14:05,598 --> 00:14:07,940 Fuck yo speech! Whoo! 378 00:14:07,971 --> 00:14:09,265 - You had to say that. - Vegas! 379 00:14:09,307 --> 00:14:11,407 No! Aah! 380 00:14:11,852 --> 00:14:12,937 Help! 381 00:14:13,353 --> 00:14:14,855 Adam, I got you! 382 00:14:18,822 --> 00:14:21,555 Oh, I gotta... I gotta get a gif of this! 383 00:14:21,636 --> 00:14:23,603 Ders... Get... Us... Off! 384 00:14:24,258 --> 00:14:25,992 Okay, all right. 385 00:14:26,131 --> 00:14:29,033 Ders, get me off! 386 00:14:32,159 --> 00:14:34,048 - Oh, my God! - You think that was funny? 387 00:14:34,092 --> 00:14:35,102 - I'm sorry. - You think that was... 388 00:14:35,120 --> 00:14:36,293 - let me see it! - I'm... 389 00:14:36,320 --> 00:14:37,654 - let me see it! - Sorry. 390 00:14:37,779 --> 00:14:38,929 Aah! 391 00:14:39,154 --> 00:14:40,157 Oh, this is funny. 392 00:14:40,186 --> 00:14:41,548 - Huh? - This is actually really funny. 393 00:14:41,573 --> 00:14:42,807 - It's pretty funny, right? - That was good. 394 00:14:42,832 --> 00:14:44,387 - Thank you. - Okay, all right. 395 00:14:44,393 --> 00:14:45,887 Let's go back and save the day! 396 00:14:45,903 --> 00:14:47,148 End tyranny! 397 00:14:47,173 --> 00:14:49,034 Find the switch for the fence! 398 00:14:49,084 --> 00:14:50,995 Oh, I got a boner for some reason. 399 00:14:51,148 --> 00:14:54,517 All right, now we find Alice, and we force her to free the people. 400 00:14:54,548 --> 00:14:55,415 - Yep. - Or... 401 00:14:55,452 --> 00:14:58,900 She forces me to fuck her or whatever, huh? 402 00:14:58,924 --> 00:15:00,439 No, Adam, we have to stop her, okay? 403 00:15:00,450 --> 00:15:01,574 This ends now. Come on, let's do this. 404 00:15:01,604 --> 00:15:03,092 Yes, that's a better plan than mine. 405 00:15:03,117 --> 00:15:05,236 Oh, damn. Jillian's a fembot. 406 00:15:05,280 --> 00:15:07,248 - Really? - Oh, they all are. 407 00:15:07,272 --> 00:15:08,709 Knuckle up, motherfuggers. 408 00:15:08,727 --> 00:15:09,684 Mm, why do you have that? 409 00:15:09,709 --> 00:15:11,258 - Huh? 'Cause. - Yeah. 410 00:15:11,281 --> 00:15:12,320 - 'Cause why? - Why? 411 00:15:12,332 --> 00:15:13,784 - It was in my butt, dude. - That was in his anus. 412 00:15:13,815 --> 00:15:16,200 To study... Because the, um... 413 00:15:16,483 --> 00:15:19,397 Just go fight your one, already, please. 414 00:15:19,422 --> 00:15:21,282 - Yeah, go, you got him. - All right, wish me luck. 415 00:15:21,307 --> 00:15:22,891 - Good luck. - Whoo! 416 00:15:25,717 --> 00:15:27,444 Whoa. Whoo! 417 00:15:27,468 --> 00:15:29,520 You are a bitch, cyborg Montez! 418 00:15:29,538 --> 00:15:30,643 You are a bitch! 419 00:15:32,059 --> 00:15:33,079 Sorry, Jet Set! 420 00:15:33,434 --> 00:15:34,748 - Yeah! - Oh! 421 00:15:38,146 --> 00:15:40,339 - Oh, was that a roundhouse? - You know it. 422 00:15:40,357 --> 00:15:42,000 Whatever happened to roundhouses, dude? 423 00:15:43,355 --> 00:15:45,300 I don't wanna do this, Jillian. 424 00:15:46,530 --> 00:15:47,665 - Oh! - Whoa. 425 00:15:47,683 --> 00:15:50,176 - Oh! - Blake, stop messing around! 426 00:15:50,196 --> 00:15:51,390 I'm not messing around. 427 00:15:51,408 --> 00:15:53,305 She's crushing my testicles. 428 00:15:53,339 --> 00:15:55,717 Ow! Oh, oh. 429 00:15:55,834 --> 00:15:58,974 Let's see if I can crush her testicles. 430 00:16:05,841 --> 00:16:08,879 Oh! 431 00:16:09,090 --> 00:16:11,155 Oh! Oh, ow. 432 00:16:11,200 --> 00:16:12,452 Swim dive! 433 00:16:13,006 --> 00:16:14,022 Yeah... oh! 434 00:16:15,566 --> 00:16:18,211 Guys! The xerox machine. 435 00:16:18,445 --> 00:16:19,530 Copy that. 436 00:16:21,366 --> 00:16:23,887 Attack! Now! Eww, oh! 437 00:16:25,154 --> 00:16:26,678 Come on, Demamp! 438 00:16:26,736 --> 00:16:28,480 Triple dude attack! 439 00:16:28,530 --> 00:16:30,741 Oh! 440 00:16:30,866 --> 00:16:32,677 Oh, nice. Come on, let's go! 441 00:16:32,722 --> 00:16:34,633 - All right. - Oh. 442 00:16:38,352 --> 00:16:40,722 Oh, hi. 443 00:16:41,273 --> 00:16:42,850 Sorry, I was just... 444 00:16:43,250 --> 00:16:44,294 I was just eating. 445 00:16:50,111 --> 00:16:52,851 {pub}All you had to do was go through orientation. 446 00:16:52,881 --> 00:16:55,559 But no, you had to cause problems. 447 00:16:55,590 --> 00:16:59,115 Yeah, 'cause "cause problems" is my middle name. 448 00:16:59,295 --> 00:17:01,359 Yeah! And being a cyborg? 449 00:17:01,390 --> 00:17:02,634 Well, that's overrated. 450 00:17:02,672 --> 00:17:04,381 And that's something I never thought I'd say. 451 00:17:04,468 --> 00:17:07,554 And we're here to put an end to the reign of Tina. 452 00:17:07,752 --> 00:17:09,966 Good luck with that, stretch. 453 00:17:12,840 --> 00:17:15,073 - Whoa! - Oh, my God! 454 00:17:15,097 --> 00:17:17,087 Tom Green! Wow, really big fan. 455 00:17:17,105 --> 00:17:18,459 - Really big fan. - I'm a huge fan. 456 00:17:18,757 --> 00:17:20,898 My bum is on the cheese. 457 00:17:21,143 --> 00:17:23,045 - My bum is on the cheese. - Cyber Tom Green, 458 00:17:23,058 --> 00:17:25,797 that's... that's awesome, but you need to shut it down. 459 00:17:25,834 --> 00:17:26,964 - Yeah. - Because soon enough, 460 00:17:26,976 --> 00:17:28,444 the cyborgs, they're gonna come for you. 461 00:17:28,475 --> 00:17:32,301 These machines would die for me, because they need me to survive. 462 00:17:34,181 --> 00:17:36,354 Oh, what, do you have a problem with that? 463 00:17:37,242 --> 00:17:39,242 Kill them already. 464 00:17:43,223 --> 00:17:45,323 Oh! 465 00:17:46,902 --> 00:17:48,844 - Swedish? - Something happened. 466 00:17:48,863 --> 00:17:50,675 The machines! They're taking over! 467 00:17:51,296 --> 00:17:52,977 - Now what are you doing? - The key card! 468 00:17:52,995 --> 00:17:54,736 We've gotta get to the mainframe! 469 00:17:55,888 --> 00:17:56,911 Screw it! 470 00:17:56,935 --> 00:17:58,735 Poor Alice, she's never gonna bang me. 471 00:18:01,286 --> 00:18:02,753 Daddy, would you like some sausage? 472 00:18:03,140 --> 00:18:04,642 Daddy, would you like some sausages? 473 00:18:04,769 --> 00:18:06,605 Sausages! Sausages! 474 00:18:06,760 --> 00:18:08,596 Get in and barricade the door! Barricade the door! 475 00:18:11,426 --> 00:18:15,004 'Sup, Tina? You naughty little computer. 476 00:18:15,041 --> 00:18:16,937 Oh, I'm gonna drain you. 477 00:18:16,987 --> 00:18:19,301 I'm gonna drain you good. 478 00:18:19,729 --> 00:18:22,232 Come on! 479 00:18:22,273 --> 00:18:23,909 - Shut her down, Demamp! - There it is! 480 00:18:23,928 --> 00:18:25,344 We can't hold him much longer! 481 00:18:25,369 --> 00:18:27,649 I'm trying! It's much harder than it looks! 482 00:18:27,688 --> 00:18:30,442 All right, well... try a "come hither" motion. 483 00:18:30,565 --> 00:18:33,158 Oh, I'm "hithering." Oh, I'm "hithering," baby! 484 00:18:33,164 --> 00:18:33,908 "Hither" harder! 485 00:18:33,935 --> 00:18:37,227 Come on! You come for me! 486 00:18:37,849 --> 00:18:38,976 Oh! 487 00:18:39,011 --> 00:18:40,034 - Oh, my God. - Okay. 488 00:18:40,059 --> 00:18:41,456 Please, not my face! 489 00:18:41,480 --> 00:18:43,832 - Uh, something's happening. - Something good? 490 00:18:43,954 --> 00:18:47,650 Something... Beautiful! 491 00:18:50,856 --> 00:18:51,956 Oh! 492 00:18:54,427 --> 00:18:58,586 Oh, come on! Oh, oh, oh. 493 00:19:01,349 --> 00:19:04,512 Hey, uh, it's... it's way over. 494 00:19:04,543 --> 00:19:05,725 - Yeah? - Yeah, it's... 495 00:19:05,742 --> 00:19:07,348 - Yeah, we did it? - Yeah. - You got him. 496 00:19:08,852 --> 00:19:11,300 Oh, no! Oh, my God! 497 00:19:11,452 --> 00:19:13,365 We killed my hero. 498 00:19:15,184 --> 00:19:16,385 Jeez! 499 00:19:16,925 --> 00:19:18,685 Where am I? 500 00:19:19,061 --> 00:19:21,740 - I don't remember anything. - Well, uh... 501 00:19:21,792 --> 00:19:23,312 - Well, you were a robot... - Yeah. 502 00:19:23,331 --> 00:19:24,290 And then now you're... 503 00:19:24,296 --> 00:19:25,705 you're just normal-ass Tom Green, 504 00:19:25,723 --> 00:19:27,296 - which is pretty cool. - Cyborg. 505 00:19:27,335 --> 00:19:28,551 Yeah, and actually... 506 00:19:28,613 --> 00:19:30,090 We are your childhood friends. 507 00:19:30,138 --> 00:19:31,381 - So... - Yep. 508 00:19:31,406 --> 00:19:32,772 - Like, your best friends. - Welcome back. 509 00:19:32,803 --> 00:19:34,451 - Yeah. - What's up, buddy? 510 00:19:34,470 --> 00:19:36,948 - Thanks, guys. - Yeah, we do what we have to. 511 00:19:37,308 --> 00:19:39,134 - Thanks, guys. - Hey! They're okay! 512 00:19:39,166 --> 00:19:42,119 Uh-huh. 513 00:19:42,279 --> 00:19:44,067 Oh, my God. We're heroes! 514 00:19:44,179 --> 00:19:45,945 Well, uh, I don't know about that. 515 00:19:45,975 --> 00:19:47,886 - We... we killed Bill, actually. - Yes. 516 00:19:47,943 --> 00:19:49,940 Very sorry about that. I did kill Bill. 517 00:19:49,946 --> 00:19:51,024 - Murdered. - That was my bad. 518 00:19:51,049 --> 00:19:51,855 I murdered him. 519 00:19:51,886 --> 00:19:54,897 I actually hope he's banging Alice's dead body in the afterlife. 520 00:20:00,763 --> 00:20:03,109 "Bang dead Alice"? 521 00:20:03,615 --> 00:20:06,830 - Oh, um... I meant... - You know what? 522 00:20:06,861 --> 00:20:08,795 Shut up, okay? Honestly, I think that was 523 00:20:08,826 --> 00:20:10,804 the dumbest story I have ever heard. 524 00:20:10,831 --> 00:20:12,727 I can't believe you let him tell it for so long. 525 00:20:12,751 --> 00:20:14,982 This is just a prototype for a pilot program. 526 00:20:15,020 --> 00:20:16,352 We're not gonna be implementing anything 527 00:20:16,371 --> 00:20:18,447 - for, like, another year. - Oh! 528 00:20:18,477 --> 00:20:19,888 Well, you should have said that right away. 529 00:20:19,913 --> 00:20:22,413 - Yeah, we're gonna quit by then. - We'll probably be dead by then. 530 00:20:22,446 --> 00:20:24,402 Please, let's just get back to the phones, now. 531 00:20:24,414 --> 00:20:26,615 - All right. - All right, I swear to God... 532 00:20:26,812 --> 00:20:28,383 - Dude, I gotta try that! - Right? That's got to... 533 00:20:30,500 --> 00:20:32,028 Do not know. 534 00:20:32,048 --> 00:20:34,029 Jillian, are you okay? 535 00:20:34,159 --> 00:20:36,576 - Somebody call 911! - Are you choking? 536 00:20:36,604 --> 00:20:38,414 Get out of the way! 537 00:20:38,553 --> 00:20:40,356 Blake! 538 00:20:40,943 --> 00:20:42,728 - Help her! - I don't know what to do! 539 00:20:42,758 --> 00:20:45,418 - Somebody help! - Oh! Oh, God! 540 00:20:45,513 --> 00:20:47,182 Aah! Aah! 541 00:20:54,007 --> 00:20:55,609 All right, enough! 542 00:20:55,643 --> 00:20:58,142 God, Blake, do you ever shut up? 543 00:20:58,359 --> 00:21:03,359 Sync and correction by Mlmlte www.addic7ed.com Resync for WEB-DL by Norther 544 00:21:03,409 --> 00:21:07,959 Repair and Synchronization by Easy Subtitles Synchronizer 1.0.0.0 38309

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