All language subtitles for Wayne.S01E08.1080p.RED.WEB-DL.AAC5.1.H.264-RTN

♪ There has been
But one true love

♪ In my baby's arms

Ugh.

Did I drool on ya?

I don't mind.

♪ And I got the hands
To hold onto them

See ya later.

I'm fuckin' starving.

We could share a candy.

Dipstix?

There's only one dip stick.

I don't wanna give you
my spit germs.

Too late.

How about these?

Nah, they got that
coconut asshole taste.

They got Sour Straws.
Those split easy.

Yeah, grab 'em.

Holy shit.

What?

They got free coffee.

And little milks.

That's creamer, ya dummy.

Tastes good, though.

Ugh.

Maybe it's too hot for coffee.

Fuckin' Florida.

Hey, you should get some shorts.

I don't wear shorts.

- Ever?
- Never.

What do you wear at the beach?

I don't know. I ain't
never been to the beach.

At least not as a bigger person.

What'd you wear when you
were a littler person?

Pants.

Okay. How far is the beach?

We're going. Pants or no pants.

They got maps.

All right. Looks like
the beach is this far.

How far is this?

- Pretty far.
- But once we get that car...

Whoo! Come on, fuckers.

Eh, grab a 30 rack
and 'em Flamin' Hots.

Oh, and grab an ice bag.
I'mma get the blunt wraps.

Yeah.

About to eat mint chocolate
chip and get high as fuck.

Oh.

Go right ahead.

Eh!

Gimme them Grape Swishy Boys.

You gonna pay
for them this time?

How about, you be the Swishy
Boys gettin' motherfucker

and shut the fuck up?

Come on.

Sour.

Here.

You want some coffee?

What the fuck?

Better clean that shit
off my car, bitch.

Your car?

Fuck's askin'?

Last chance, motherfucker.

Clean it.

Man, there's no way you can
chug a beer in two seconds.

Not in my mouth.

Would you two stop butt
chuggin' in my fuckin' house?

You're lucky ice melts.

What the fuck was that?

My dad's car.

Are you fuckin' kiddin' me?

That... That's the car?

The one that's drivin' away?

It was gold.

You never told me
it was fuckin' gold.

What the fuck?

What are we gonna do?

We gonna go get it, or what?

Oh, my God. What the fuck?

I cannot believe you
let that car get away.

Came all the way to fuckin' Florida for
you to let that fuckin' car get away.

How the hell are we
gonna find 'em now?

Let's go.

Check it. Those twins
posted something. Look.

Hey, I'm driving.

Richmond Hill Hospital,
where's that?

I'm guessing somewhere
around Richmond Hill.

And that's an hour and a half
drive behind us.

Well, good. That means we're
that much closer to Florida

than those Neanderthals.

We're comin' for ya, Wayne!

Hey! You can't yell
at the driver.

Jeez.

This hospital's hashtag
got some wild shit on it.

Damn.

This used to be
a dude's face, look.

Hey! Get that out
of my fucking face!

I'm fucking driving, Orlando!
Jesus Christ!

You're gonna fucking
kill both of us!

Shoot.

Three fucks and the Lord's name in vain.
What's wrong with you?

I'm sorry, bud.

I'm starvin'.

Why is nothin' open?

Maybe because we're in the
Bible Belt on a Sunday?

Nothing's open.

I gotta eat soon.

Once my blood sugar dips,

I'm just not my
usual fun lovin' self.

Look, if you get tired,
I could drive.

You're not driving.

All right, look. You need a hot meal
at any time of the day, guaranteed?

There's only one place
for you to go.

A strip club? You want me
to eat food in a strip club?

There is zero chance
I'm going in there.

And even less
of a chance you are.

It's not funny, Orlando.
I told you about my blood sugar.

I'm serious, I'm hungry.

And you bring me
to a strip club.

Jesus.

Are they making ribs in there?

I think the strip club
has a smoker.

Hey!

All right. All right.

Just real quick.
We'll just go in quick.

Oh, man.

Gotta admit, it's pretty cool.

All right, here's
what we're gonna do.

It's an old car,
so I can hot-wire it.

You get in the passenger side, lay
low while I sneak around, fire it up.

We'll be out of here before
they can say, "What the fuck?"

Wayne?

Yeah.

Hot-wire.

Wayne, what're you doing?

Wayne.

Oh, shit. It's coffee boy.

- Yo, whatchoo doin' with our beers, homie?
- Fucker.

Hey, you touch one more beer,
I'm gonna kick your ass, bro.

It's tea time, motherfucker.

Wayne.

- Little bitch.
- Let's get this fucking party started!

Come on, Chamomile,
show him what Ocala all about.

You fucked up now, coffee boy.

Shouldn't have done that, bitch.

You got knocked the fuck out!

I never dropped your beer.

What the fuck?

Shit.

Oh, fuck!

Who the fuck you think you is?

Hey.

Hey!

What the fuck is goin' on?

Holy fucking shit.

Well, you look
just like your father.

Isn't this nice, hmm?

Everybody sitting together,
like family supper.

There's fruit in the salad.

Yeah, I know, it's, um, part of
that food pyramid or whatever.

You know, maybe it's good
that the party was canceled

because it's just more for us.

That's right.

And I don't know why I'm always
feeding those animals anyway.

Those are my friends, Mama.

Well, one of your "friends" took
a dump in my nice plant pot.

- Mama?
- Mmm.

Can you cut
the meat off my ribs?

- What?
- You know you do it like I like.

Oh, come on.

What's the matter with you?

Cutting meat for you, weirdo.

He come outta you?

Huh? Him? No. This is
Calvin's boy from before.

Reggie comes out of what I
call an "F'd up relationship."

I F'd up and had relations with
someone after too many tallboys.

Oh, my God.

Well, it must a relief
he's not yours.

No offense.

None taken.

Hey, coffee boy,

got lucky today.

Almost got took'd out
by Chamomile.

Why do you call him Chamomile?

'Cause he puts
motherfuckers to sleep.

- I'm still awake.
- For now.

Wow. Does anybody
want more potato salad?

'Cause it's so good,
it's very fancy,

it's got the skin still on, it's
got those tiny little green...

Oh, my God. I'm
sorry, do you not care

how your son's been doing
for the past 11 goddamn years?

Has it been 11 goddamn years?

Really?

You know,
I noticed you was taller.

Oh, yeah, since he was five?
That's kinda how it works.

- Hey.
- Okay, that was a joke.

And I thought it was good.

- Stop.
- You know what?

You should really stop
laying out in the sun.

Your orange skin's
distractin' me

from your one fake tit that's
bigger than the other fake tit.

- All right.
- What the fuck?

- Calm down.
- You think ya better than me?

- Do you think you're better than me?
- Hey. Shh.

- Calm...
- Dad's dead.

Cancer. From his job.

Yeah, he always worked too much.

I told him. I said, "Those...
Those fumes, they're gonna get ya."

Which worked out in my favor.

Just saying.

Well, may he rest in peace.

Right?

Who wants dessert?
Everybody saving room?

'Cause I got Entenmanns.

Fuckin' A.

- Mama?
- What?

Can you get me
some more Hi-C, please?

Sure.

Right.

Hi.

You ain't gettin' in here,
little man.

I'm Krystal's kid.

Fifteen bucks.

I'm Krystal's accountant.

Then write that shit off.

Can I get a receipt?

It was just a joke.

Just a little accountant humor.

There you go.

Good day.

How did you know
there was gonna be a Krystal?

Dude, there's always a Krystal.

I see you, baby.

Oh, yeah! I love it!

These places, they
never made sense to me.

You got all these women.

- They get their clothes off.
- Mmm-hmm.

Okay? They never ever
would do it with you.

And you pay them
your money, you get up,

you go home,
you're all worked up.

It's like payin' a restaurant
to smell the food.

Dude, could you just shut up
and enjoy the nekkid?

What's "the nekkid"?

The nekkid, you know?

Look, there's the buffet.

"The naked."

Whoa, whoa, whoa.

Few rules.

- Never take the top plate.
- Yeah.

- Always use the tongs.
- Yeah, yeah.

- And never get the last of anything.
- Yeah, yeah, yeah.

There's always
a fresh batch on its way.

Uh-huh. Yeah.

Ow!

Hey. What'd I just say?

I'm sorry, I wasn't listening.

Well, that was fuckin'
delightful.

What are we still doing here?

She made us supper.

Oh, yeah, mother
of the fuckin' year.

Now, can we please take the car
and get the hell out of here?

There you fuckin' is.

Hey, you wanna see something?

Depends what it is.

It's my birthday present.

I'm taking your boyfriend.

Come on, bitch. Hurry up.

Oh.

You two go play nice, huh?

Yes, Mama.

I could use some help
with the dishes in there.

Oh, okay. You want me to go get
your husband or whatever he is?

Yeah, sure.

If it ain't a car or my tits, he
ain't puttin' his hands on it.

Thanks for that picture.

I'll tell you something else.

Ever since I started wearing
these rubber gloves to do dishes,

my nails, they just
don't break so much.

- Oh, is that right?
- Yeah, and I used to be a manicurist.

Hey, you know how everyone thinks that
their toes are the most disgusting?

- Well, they're right.
- Oh, wow, that's a great story, Maureen.

Maybe they'll make
a movie out of it.

But what was my worst job?

Let's see.

What the fuck
is wrong with this thing?

There's nothing wrong
with that thing.

I made that. Yeah.

Jesus.

I did. I took a pottery class
at the rec center.

And I thought it was
gonna be like Ghost.

But you know what?

I didn't see a single
Patrick Swayze.

So I quit.

I didn't need that.

That shit's
harder than it looks.

What's hard? Showing up?

What?

Aw, look at you. You got a mouth on you.
You know what?

You know who you remind me of?
Me.

Oh, yeah? You remind me
of my Aunt Linda.

Oh, yeah? She liked
to make pottery?

No, she liked to make meth.

Also left the family. Then she blew
herself up in a shitty trailer.

I don't gotta
explain myself to you.

Yeah, you're right.

I ain't the one
you gotta explain anything to.

Well,

he seemed like
he turned out just fine.

You don't know
anything about him.

My life was
very complicated back then.

Jesus fucking Christ.

Everybody's life
is fucking complicated.

You know?
It don't make it right.

You runnin' out on your family.

Oh, yeah?

Where's your family?

Whoops.

I'm just fuckin' with you.

Here she is.

She's a beauty.

Did some head work
to get the horsepower over 325.

One of the few
gas guzzlers left.

Till all of them fuckin' hippies got
all uppity about the environment.

Fuckin' hippies.

It's a relic from another era.

Plus the backseat's good
to do the fuckin' in.

So, Wayne,

- you come all this way just to have a salad with fruit in it?
- Hmm?

You like cars?

Certain ones.

Know anything about 'em?

Certain ones.

Well, this one runs hot.

Real hot.

- You don't want it to overheat.
- Mmm-mmm.

Top it off.

You know, Reg, I actually got
this car from Wayne's old man.

No shit.

He loved it.

But it just became
too much for him to handle.

Damn.

Not what I heard.

Oh, yeah? What'd you hear?

That you stole it.

- "Stole."
- "Stole."

That don't sound right.

Seeing as though I got the title

and the keys.

Oh, shit.

Thanks, Daddy.

Well, I got a bunch of postcards

with a picture of a dickhead
and his stupid mustache on 'em.

Fuck!

Hey, keep your punk bitch-ass
hands off my baby.

You're out of coolant, dickhead.

Daddy, I... I will whip
that boy's ass...

Shut the fuck up, Reggie.

What happened?

Ah, don't worry. Nothing
broke but this ugly bowl.

Hey, I got it. I got it.

I don't mind.

No pics of you up there.

You're so stupid.

I got more pictures, you know,

of you, from when
you was little.

Come on. Yeah.

That's one ugly-ass fish.

Does it sing a song
or somethin'?

Oh. No, that's real.

I mean, it was real.

The boys caught it.
They love noodling.

What the fuck is "noodling"?

Oh, wait, I don't care.

Ah! Ka-blam.

Here we go.

C'mere, handsome.

Look how cute you were.

Still is.

How's a baby get a shiner?

Gave it to himself. Yeah.

Took your father's hammer,

went after your Big Wheel,
tried to bash it.

Took one swing
at that big plastic tire

and the hammer bounces back.
Bam. Right in the eye.

Maybe somebody should've
been watchin' him.

You loved to carry
that hammer everywhere.

I... I never understood
why you loved it so much,

but maybe 'cause it had your father's
name scratched into the handle, I think.

And my name.

Yeah.

Yeah, sweetie, I know.
You wiseass.

Remember this?

When your brother tried to
dress you up like a clown?

But instead of using makeup,

he used nail polish.

Huh?

And not the cheap stuff,
not the Wet n Wild.

Like, the pricey shit.

I went apeshit when I came home
and saw what he did to you.

Took a whole bottle of acetone
just to get that off.

Must have burned like hell.

That was the crazy part.

I'm just rubbin' this nail
polish remover all over his face

and he's just sitting there,
lookin' up at me, smiling.

Didn't cry once.

You used nail polish remover
on his face?

Well, the rubbin' alcohol
didn't work.

Doesn't matter.

You still got a nice face underneath
all them bruises and shit.

Oh, Jesus Christ.

Your hair smells so terrible.

It's okay.

Let's get you some, uh, shampoo
and some bathroom shit, you know.

Acetone-free, I promise.
Come on.

I hate it.

Look, they got that shower
gel that's got mangoes.

Oh, yeah.

Oh.

You know, we already
got shower gel.

It ain't all tutti-frutti,
but, you know, it'll do.

What are we doin' here?

Shoppin', I guess?

Yeah, I know.
I can see that, but...

Wayne, you gotta come see this.

How stupid is this shirt?

"Saturyays"? Fuck you.

You know what? Your father
sees somebody in this shirt,

he'd beat his ass.

I'd beat my own ass.

Ah, yeah, you would.

Oh, my God.

You got the exact
same smile as him.

Double line here,
single line there.

Oh, I used to love that smile.

Till he went and got
all his teeth knocked out

at that hockey game in Taunton.

You know, your father
was a real hothead.

Yeah.

Yeah.

We gotta take a picture.

We do. We gotta do it. Uh...

Hey, Del, take my phone. C'mon.

Here we go.

Mmm!

Cheese.

Oops, cut your head off.

Well, take another one.

Okay, here we go.

Mwah.

Aw. My finger's in the photo.

- Hmm?
- I'm not takin' another one.

Mmm...

Me and my handsome boy.

I mean, I look like
garbage, but whatever.

No, I do. Still, this one's
goin' on the fridge.

For sure. Definitely.

All right. While you're in Florida,
gotta get your shorts, right? Come on.

- Wayne don't ever wear shorts...
- Okay.

Really?

Shorts?

What do you think?

It's got pockets.
It's good, right?

- Okay.
- Got a... Comes with a belt.

Yeah? I mean, these...

Yeah.

♪ Headstone Headstone

♪ I got to put him
In the cold, cold ground

♪ In the cold, cold ground

Hey, Stacey, let me know
if I'm in your way.

By the way,

I really appreciate how you
spelled out the alphabet

with your body
up there on the pole.

I was an educator.
It's not lost on me.

Where's the kid?

I said, where's
the motherfuckin' kid?

I know, I was taught not to
speak with my mouth full.

Maybe you could
learn some manners.

- Motherfucker. I'll fucking fuck you up.
- Hey!

How's that for manners?

Uh, needs some work.
What'd the kid do?

That little shit charged a round of drinks
and a cash advance in my fuckin' name.

Oh, uh... Hey, Krystal.

I haven't seen you since
your last tax appointment.

By the way, I have some documents
I need you to sign in the car.

Bitch, I don't fuckin' know you.

I don't know you
or that stupid-ass kid,

egg-headed motherfucker.

Where is he?

I... I don't...

Where's the fuckin' kid?

- I don't know.
- Say again?

Yo, the little motherfucker's
in the champagne room.

- What?
- What?

And I got you some
tighty-whities.

What? Don't be shy.

There's no shame
in having clean drawers.

Excuse me, miss. I need to
check the young lady's bag.

Why? What's the problem?

This girl was stealing.

What?

Beard oil?

Uh... Okay. I'm sure there's
some misunderstanding.

She obviously ain't
got no beard. Yet.

Sorry, ma'am.
We got it on camera.

They got it on camera.

Why you break my heart
like this, huh?

Oh, God.

Kids do such dumb shit.

I mean, I know I did
when I was her age.

Fifteen, right?

Who isn't totally screwed up,
you know?

They got all these hormones.
They're just running wild, right?

Do you think you could have a heart
and just maybe look the other way?

And I promise I'm gonna
set her down when I get home.

Next time,
we will press charges.

Oh, you're a saint.
I could kiss you.

You have my word.

I'm gonna send her to one
of those Christian camps.

You know, where
they put the Lord in her.

She's not my fucking mother.

Oh, here we go
with that one again.

I've been excommunicated.

Sorry she did that.

Thanks for helping her.

It's no big whoop.

Gonna try on your beard oil?

You gonna try on your shorts?

You're lucky
she stood up for you.

You could've got
in real trouble.

Yeah, she's a real
goddamn peach.

She went out of her way for you.

Didn't fuckin' ask her to.

Why'd you do it?

Why'd you start a fight instead
of stealing the goddamn car?

What the hell are we here for?

I found the bus ticket
in your bag.

What?

When?

You're gonna leave me.

Okay, yeah.

Yeah, maybe I needed
a backup plan.

Maybe I wasn't thinking straight
when I came here with you.

This whole fucking time,
it wasn't even about the car.

It was about your fucking mother.
You're a liar.

No, I'm not.

I just didn't know
what I wanted and...

Maybe I wanted...

I don't know, it's my family.

Oh, yeah?

Yeah, like the fucking family that
I left to come on this stupid trip?

For you?

She left you once, Wayne.

She'll do it again.

You left me once.

I'm not fucking
sleeping in here.

Del, you don't have to...

I need to shower.

Okay, all right, we're leaving!

We left!

- Nice shirt.
- Really? You're making fun of my shirt?

You're a shirt shamer.

Nice vest. Let me know
when you kill Jason Bourne.

Well, that was fun.

No, that was not fun.

That was not fun!

We could've got arrested
or worse!

But we didn't, so chill.

I had to cover
everything you spent.

Okay? I'm a high school
principal.

I don't have a lot of extra
cash just laying around.

Now, I know you think
you know a lot about life,

like how not to eat
the last shrimp.

But you don't know
shit about real life!

You're just a fucking kid!

Damn.

You hungry again already?

I'm sorry, I went berserker.
I'm sorry...

I... I'm sorry.

Nah, that's okay.

It's kind of cool to have
someone yell at me.

For once.

My grandma, um...

She got dementia, so...

Jesus, I had no idea.

She thinks I'm 47 years old.

What, for real?

Yeah.

I have to make sure
the bills are paid.

You know, make sure
the gas is turned off,

sign the health insurance forms.

Well, no kid should
have to deal with that.

You were lookin' out for me.

It's nice to have someone else be
the grown-up for once in my life.

I don't know...

You want me
to keep yelling at you?

Nah, I'm good.

Let's go find Wayne.
Yell at him instead.

You want me to take you
for an ice-cream cone first?

If you can find one of those
coin-operated spaceships,

you go on a little ride.

Ah, go fuck yourself.

You know, I think
that Stacey liked me.

You know, like,
like me, like me.

Yeah, she liked your money, too.

Del?

Del?

♪ There's a fallen tree
By a creek side

♪ That you laid on, and told me

♪ Don't let the fear
Of losing me

♪ Keep you from moving on

Del?

♪ Far from the prying eyes

♪ Of our friends who came

♪ By the fireflies

♪ That show our way

♪ We were starting To slip away

♪ That's when I was in love

♪ Just for you to hear me play

♪ Starting to realize

♪ I'm the one that doesn't stay

♪ I'm the one that goes away

♪ I'm the one that goes away

♪ I'm the one that goes away

Next on Wayne...

So, you come all this way
to eat my fucking cereal?

Or 'cause you miss
your mama or some shit?

I've got my own candle business.

Anyone ask you
to fucking do that?

Jesus fucking Christ!

He's gotta fucking go.

Regardless of how inconvenient
this might be for you,

he's still my fucking kid.

We're gonna find Wayne...

Oh, watch out for the dog!

Looking for a boy
named Wayne McCullough.

- Wayne is in danger.
- Nobody's fucking with him.

The place is like a white trash
fortress of meth heads and crocodiles.