Original subtitles

? What would you do if I sang out of tune? ?

? Would you stand up and walk out on me? ?

? Lend me your ears, and I'll sing you a song ?

? I will try not to sing out of key, yeah ?

? Oh, baby, I get by ? ? By with a little help from my friends ?

? All I need is my buddies ?

? High with a little help from my friends ?

? I'm sayin' I'm gonna get higher ? ?Try with a little help from my friends ?

? Whoa-oa-oa-oa ?

? Oh, oh, oh, oh ?

? Somebody who knows quite sure ?

? Baby ?

? By with a little help from my friends ?

? Said I'm gonna make it with my friends ?

? Try with a little help from my friends ?

? Oh, I'm gonna keep on trying ?

? High with a little help from my friends ?

? I'm gonna keep on trying now, baby ?

? Ooh, ooh, ooh ?

In march of 1972,

a lot of great things were happening.

Events that would shape history and alter the way we think.

And I bet you Mao Tse-Tung

asking about the busing business over here.

You fellas know I'm running for president.

A good woman...

Still, among all that change, there was a common thread,

one experience that united us all...

[ School bell rings ]

? Papa-papa-papa-oom-mow-mow ?

? Papa-oom-mow-mow ?

Lunch.

At 12:05 P.M. every day,

kids all over America piled into high school cafeterias,

like lemmings to the meatloaf.

You remember. The sights, the sounds.

And that smell.

That odd combination of wet trays, warm silverware,

and pale green beans.

But lunch at my school,

like most others, was rarely about food.

It was about drama, lust, power.

Intrigue.

[ Laughter ]

Not to mention humiliation.

In a way, it was kind of a stage

and we its principal players.

There were those who could never seem

to find a place to sit

and those no one wanted to sit with.

Those with natural charm

and those who had to work for it.

Okay, everybody... watch! One bite!

- Go! Go! Go! - Go! Go! Go!

- Yeah! Yeah! - Whoo!

Me, I was just an ordinary Joe

being served something unidentifiable

by a guy in a hairnet,

stocking up on waxy milk and congealed blue-plate special.

Yeah. All in all, life was good.

I don't believe it.

Isn't she beautiful?

Chuck Coleman had one obsession in life...

Sheila McCaffry, clarinet player.

I mean, she is hot!

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

I mean, not just regular hot. I mean, she is...

- Diaphanous. - Diaphanous.

For the past three weeks, Chuck had been using that word.

I'm pretty sure he thought it meant "stacked."

So why don't you just ask her out?

[ Gasps ] You can't just make a move on a girl like that!

You have to find the precise moment,

the perfect thing to say,

the right shirt!

Face it. The guy was scared witless.

- Chuck? - What?

We're here.

Oh.

- Hey, Ricky. - Hey, guys.

That was the thing about lunch...

you always sat with the same people

because, well, you always sat with the same people.

Hey, I get the pickle.

- Ah! - Please?

Hey, guys.

[ Chuckles ]

- What? - Nice tie.

- What, did your Mom dress you again? - Oh, very funny.

Look, I got a debate tournament this afternoon.

I got to look nice.

Now, of course, Paul was the brain of our group.

So we treated him with the respect he deserved.

Well, sit down before somebody sees you!

[ Chuckles ]

Oh, remind me to laugh.

Hey, are you gonna have those mashed potatoes?

Ricky, I just got here.

Ricky! Ricky!

Did you do your report for Kalton's class?

Uh, report? What report?

The report! The one that's due today!

A thousand words on a day in the life

of a citizen of ancient Rome.

And if I don't get it done, I'm gonna fail!

I'm gonna look like an idiot!

Are you sure it's due today?

14 people told me it was.

Well... well, how come we didn't know about it?

I have to go! I have to find a pencil.

Oh, my God!

Ricky! Calm down.

A thousand words.

W-what am I gonna do? I... I don't know.

It was inevitable.

Every day, somewhere between fish sticks and Jell-O,

Ricky Halsenbach would have at least one academic crisis.

Okay, okay. I can do this.

A day in the life of ancient Rome.

By Ricky Halsenbach.

Okay, 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11.

Ricky David Halsenbach.

Sure, we weren't exactly the "a" table...

Excuse me, I-is this seat...

-taken! - Taken! -Taken!

But we had our standards...

Such as they were.

[ Sighs ] Look at her, Kev.

Doesn't Sheila look just like Ali MacGraw?

I'm gonna get a soda.

Heck, even I needed a break from these bozos

once in awhile...

which in this case meant a trip to the soda machine.

In our cafeteria, it was...

So, Arnold... How's it hanging?

On the other side of the tracks.

Hey.

Jimmy Donnelly, Joey Spinoza, and Neal Pemish.

Their school motto was "we came, we left."

Thanks.

So, Arnold, we're, uh, ditching fifth and sixth period.

Good for you.

Yeah, we're gonna see "the devil in miss Jones."

Yeah, right.

Um, w-what's that supposed to mean?

It means it's X-rated.

Oooh!

- Whoa! - Whoa.

That's no problem.

My cousin works the door. Figured we'd take in a matinee.

Yeah, we thought you might want to come along.

Me?

Yeah, we like you.

We think you're great!

Everybody says you're a really cool guy.

Well...

Plus, you got a car.

Look, uh, Pemish's carburetor blew up again,

and, uh, we really thought you'd be the kind of guy

who'd want to help us out.

Well, I'm not.

Sure. We understand.

You, uh... you got to get back

to your geeky friends over there.

Hey, for your information, my friends are not geeks.

[ Laughs ]

Yeah. Right.

Oh, yeah?

No, no.

Hmm.

Proof's in the pudding, man.

Well, anyway, I'm not interested, okay?

Just think about it, Arnold.

That's all we ask. Just think about it.

Sure. I'll do that.

Let's face it. I wasn't the ditching type.

I was more your average, everyday...

- Thanks, butthead. - Hey!

Victim.

- I need this, okay? - Buy your own!

It's not for me.

It's for... Him.

We called him "maniac."

You know the type.

You never knew where he came from,

what he was thinking,

how many family members he might have killed.

Some guys bet me 20 bucks

I couldn't find out maniac's real name.

[ Chuckles ]

And you think a can of soda's gonna do it?

Nah, nah, nah, nah. This is just the icebreaker.

You're out of your mind.

Hey, for 20 bucks,

I'd lick the paint off our house with my tongue.

[ Chuckles ]

I got news for you.

A year later, he did it... for 10.

Ah! Here we are.

Hi!

Uh, you don't know me, but, uh...

I'm Wayne Arnold, and you would be...

Here.

Bottoms up. [ Chuckles ]

Kevin! Wait.

- Hey, Winnie. - Have a minute?

Was she kidding? For Winnie, I had a lifetime.

You bet.

See, I volunteered to run this drive for McKinley,

and I really need people to contribute.

But you know how people are.

Yeah, I know.

They're so apathetic.

So I thought...

Winnie. Winnie. Count me in.

Great!

After all, this was the love of my life...

Potentially.

The future mother of my children...

Potentially.

There wasn't anything I wouldn't do for her.

So, what am I contributing?

Blood.

[ "The murder" from "psycho" plays ]

Blood?

Blood?!

Kevin, I wouldn't ask if it wasn't really important.

Oh, God. I was caught between sex and death.

Sex, death, sex, death.

Sex.

Okay, I'll do it.

Great!

See you after lunch.

Great.

Great.

- Go! Go! Go! Go! Go! - Go! Go! Go! Go! Go!

[ Cheering ]

Meanwhile, back at the zoo...

Okay, "an ancient Roman lived"

"in a Roman house with a Roman wife

and spoke Roman to a lot of Roman people."

What do you think so far?

Don't change a word.

Have you noticed Sheila's skin?

It's not just like regular skin.

It's... it's like that thin paper

that we use in typing class.

Sheila, Sheila.

Why don't you just go talk to her?

- I can't. - Why not?

Well... She's eating.

It's a cafeteria, Chuck.

Paul, you can't ask a girl out when she's eating!

It's like a land mine!

I mean, what happens if she smiles

and she has all these particles of tuna on her teeth?

She'd be humiliated!

You can't recover from something like that.

Chuck, will you stop acting like such a geek?

Well, what do you mean?

If you want to ask her out, ask her out.

And from small ideas do great decisions grow.

You're right, Kevin.

So began that long march,

that test of fortitude and manhood.

What's he doing?

He's tying his shoes.

But he's got loafers on.

Okay, here we go.

Now what?

He's tucking in his shirt.

Hey, it's tucked, you doofus!

Who's he waving at?

Okay, he's gonna do it now.

He's running away.

What's the matter with him?

Did better than I thought he would.

What happened?

You were right there!

My part was off.

You're so full of it.

I'll ask her out later!

Well, if she turns you down,

you can always go out with the guy in the hairnet.

Shut up, Pfeiffer!

Maybe you could take him to the prom.

[ Laughter ]

But it was almost as if Paul's sarcasm

had aroused the anger of the lunch gods.

My pants!

And they smote him down

with four ounces of ground beef and a can of tomato sauce.

? Oom-mow-mow, papa-oom-mow-mow ?

? Papa-pa-oom-mow-mow-mow ?

? Papa-oom-mow-mow ?

? Papa-pa-oom-mow-mow-mow ?

? Papa-oom-mow-mow ?

? Papa-pa-oom ?

It was halfway through lunch.

In Paris, peace talks were getting under way...

While in Washington,

five campaign workers

were breaking in to Democratic headquarters.

But we at McKinley had more pressing concerns.

It's not getting any better!

- Paul, take it easy. - Easy?

How am I gonna debate this afternoon

with sloppy Joe on my pants?

Paul, it's not that...

maybe no one'll see it.

So, I notice you eat alone all the time.

Bet you'd like some friends, huh?

Hey, I got an idea!

Um, maybe if I knew your name,

I could introduce you around, you know,

get to know some people.

So...

Have any hobbies?

Hey, do any of you guys know how to spell "org-y"?

That's "orgy," Ricky. O-r-g-y.

I should have asked her out.

I'm spineless. That's what I am.

If they cut me open, I wouldn't have a spine.

I blew it. I totally blew it.

Chuck, it'll be okay.

Oh, no. Oh, no.

Here she comes.

I got to talk to her. I got to talk to her.

I can't.

I'm not ready. I can't do it.

I got to. I can't. I can't.

I got to. I got to.

Oh, I can't.

I can't, I can't, I can't, I can't.

Stop.

Please.

[ Clears throat ]

Hi.

[ Chuckles ]

I'm Chuck.

Hi.

I was just wondering, um,

if maybe you'd like to, uh, go out sometime.

Amazing.

After three months, Chuck had finally done it...

Gee, Chuck.

That'd be nice.

And hit pay dirt.

Great.

And that's when it happened.

[ Rattling ]

How about Friday?

Uh... Friday.

I have band practice this Friday.

Saturday. Um, we could go skating.

Oh, gee... guests from out of town.

It was horrible.

Right before our eyes,

the kid was twitching his way toward total self-destruction.

Uh, how about next weekend?

Uh, I think I'm gonna have to study that weekend.

The weekend after that?

I may have band festival.

Um, you know, maybe we should just try this, you know,

when, uh, you're not so busy.

Yeah.

It was great talking to you.

Yeah.

And in that moment,

I guess we all searched our hearts

for the right thing to say.

The caring thing. The sensitive thing.

Kev, you got to take me to the bathroom. -What?

- I can't let anyone see me like this. - Paul.

Just... just... just walk in front of me.

You can come out now, Paul.

Is anybody in here?

Paul.

I mean, hey, I'd led the horse to water.

What he did now was up to him.

Kev, I think it spread.

Paul, stop worrying. You'll get it out.

Besides, no one's even gonna see it.

Hey! Nice stain, Pfeiffer.

[ Laughter ]

It's sloppy Joe!

Yeah, right.

So, Arnold... Made up your mind yet?

About what?

The movie.

You know, "the devil in miss Jones."

Oh.

Listen, guys, I don't think I'm gonna go.

You know what your problem is, Arnold?

You think too much. You know that?

So you miss a few classes. So what?

And faced with logic like that,

there was only one thing to say.

Kevin, you can't cut school.

You can get into a lot of trouble that way.

Or you could get suspended. What if someone finds out?

What about your parents?

Just think how your mother will feel

if she found out that you went to a dirty movie.

And standing there,

listening to a guy with chopped meat on his pants

preach the ten commandments of geekdom,

the decision seemed pretty clear.

Good luck on the debate, Paul.

Let's go, guys.

[ "Peter Gunn" theme plays ]

After all, I wasn't just doing this for me.

I was doing it for the reputation

of my entire lunch table.

Okay, I was doing it for me.

Still, as we marched down that hall,

I felt a thrill of exhilaration.

I was taking a walk on the wild side

with guys who knew the terrain.

It was intoxicating, dangerous...

Boys! Where are you going?

Stupid.

What are you doing?

Who, us?

Yeah, you.

Well...

Guess it was clear someone was gonna take the rap.

We were following him.

Yeah. W-where were you taking us, Kevin?

Uh...

And at that moment,

I saw my entire academic career flash before my eyes.

I saw my mother wringing her hands.

I saw my father wringing my neck.

We were just going...

Kevin?

Winnie.

Kevin.

You gonna donate blood now?

Blood?

Blood?

Blood.

That afternoon, we didn't get to see "devil in miss Jones."

But we did get free juice and cookies.

Are we feeling better, Mr. Donnelly?

It was 10 minutes to the hour,

and the drama of lunch

was hurtling towards its final curtain.

Look, I'll level with you.

I made a bet for $20 that I could find out your name.

Now, I'll give you...

10 bucks right now

if you will just tell me your name!

Please!

Florence.

Excuse me?

My name's Florence.

Florence.

Well, thanks a lot.

I'll never forget this, Florence. [ Chuckles ]

Just one thing.

If I find out you told anyone, I swear I'll kill you.

Still, in those waning seconds,

there was time for a moment of teenage compassion.

Hey, Chuck.

How you doing?

Okay.

I guess.

You know...

I really didn't think she was that hot anyway.

Yeah.

Neither did I.

[ School bell rings ]

There!

I did it. I finished it!

A thousand words?

Yeah! You know, it's pretty good.

I think I might actually get a "c" on this.

Ricky, Ricky! Did you finish your report?!

- Yeah, I just got it done. - You did?

It's not fair!

I couldn't do mine. I drew a blank.

I'm sorry, Alice.

I'm gonna get an "f"! My parents are gonna kill me!

I'm not gonna get into fashion school!

But most of all,

there was still time for heroes to emerge...

heroes as noble and virtuous as the Roman gods,

or as simple as...

Here, Alice. Take mine.

I don't need to go to fashion school.

Ricky Halsenbach.

You'd do that for me?

I want to.

And there you had it. Lunch.

Where romances bloomed and died and returned again.

Like last week's leftover tuna casserole.

What's an "org-y"?

Where the fondest dreams and aspirations of young adults

reached their zenith...

Hey, tomorrow, guys... tomorrow, 18 chili dogs.

And I'm gonna go to bed without brushing my teeth.

[ Laughs ]

And the quest for knowledge became its own reward.

Sure, maybe all those dramas played out over lunch

weren't really dramas after all.

Did you ever notice how hot Sarah Brockman looks in shorts?

I mean, not just hot but... Diaphanous.

Still, looking back...

They sure seemed that way.

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