All language subtitles for The Wonder Years s05e10 Pfeiffers Pfortune.eng

? What would you do
if I sang out of tune? ?

? Would you stand up
and walk out on me? ?

? Lend me your ears,
and I'll sing you a song ?

? I will try not to sing
out of key, yeah ?

? Oh, baby, I get by ?
? By with a little help from my friends ?

? All I need is my buddies ?

? High with a little help
from my friends ?

? I'm sayin' I'm gonna get higher ?
?Try with a little help from my friends ?

? Whoa-oa-oa-oa ?

? Oh, oh, oh, oh ?

? Somebody who knows
quite sure ?

? Baby ?

? By with a little help
from my friends ?

? Said I'm gonna make it
with my friends ?

? Try with a little help
from my friends ?

? Oh, I'm gonna
keep on trying ?

? High with a little help
from my friends ?

? I'm gonna keep on trying now,
baby ?

? Ooh, ooh, ooh ?

[ "59th Street Bridge Song"
plays ]

Whenever I look back
on growing up in the suburbs,

there's one thing
I remember most clearly.

Our neighbors, the Pfeiffers,
were always there.

? Slow down,
you move too fast ?

? You got to make... ?

But we were more
than just neighbors.

We were like
one big happy family.

? Lookin' for fun,
and feelin' groovy ?

And at the heart of it all
were our dads...

the men who set the tone.

? Feelin' groovy ?

My Dad, the athlete.

And Paul's Dad,
the optometrist.

Under their watchful eyes,

our families grew
and prospered.

One for all, and all for one.

Until, that is,
things started to change.

[ School bell rings ]

Hey, it's the Pfeiff.
How you doin'?

Great, man.

Take Paul going to prep
school, for instance.

"Pfeiff"? What is that...
like Barney fife?

Well, actually,
it's "the Pfeiff."

Oh, oh, I'm sorry.

From now on, you can call me...
"The Kev."

But the changes
weren't just about nicknames.

Man, I got a ton of homework.

Ugh. Me too.

I have a 3-page report on
"Evangeline" due by tomorrow.

I got 45 pages
on economic imperialism.

Typed.

You win.

Oh, big prize.

And they didn't stop at
academic differences, either.

[ Music plays ]

There were other changes, too.

Bigger changes.

Oh, Alvin! It's wonderful!

25 inches diagonal.

The Pfeiffers
had come into money.

Isn't she a beaut?

I didn't know you guys
were getting a new TV.

Neither did I.

Well, I saw it in the window.

And you know me.

I'm a spur-of-the-moment
kind of guy.

I decided my family
deserves a little luxury.

In this case, "little"
being an understatement.

Looks expensive.

Oh, well, you know,
Dad made this investment

in some beachfront property.

Yeah, and he pulled in
a truckload of moola.

Debbie.

Well, that's what you said
last night.

It wasn't that much.

Maybe not.

Uh, let's try
the remote control.

But it seemed,
with his windfall,

Alvin Pfeiffer was standing
a little taller these days,

at least in the eyes
of his family.

Alvin, look!

They look like they're coming
right through the screen!

Not that I begrudged the
Pfeiffers their good fortune,

you understand.

I mean, who would?

Damn!

You okay, Dad?

Fine.

That was my Dad.

He had his own way
of taking care of his family.

More the do-it-yourself
approach.

Of course, we tried to give him
as much support as possible.

Hey, "get smart" starts
in 15 minutes.

Maybe we should drop in
on the Pfeiffers.

After all, billionaire or not,

he was the man we looked up to
and trusted.

Jack, maybe we should
call somebody

before you electrocute yourself.

Everything's under control,
Norma.

[ Electricity crackles ]

Hey, I got an idea.

You should buy some land
like old man Pfeiff-ster.

Shut up, butthead!

You shut up!

Wayne!

Your father takes good care
of us.

Besides, I like this old TV.

Alvin's lucky
he didn't lose his shirt.

Yeah.
Instead he got a color TV.

But the fact was,
when it came to high finance,

my Dad was just more
of a conservative man,

a man of quiet wisdom.

What the hell is this?

In short, a man of small parts.

What'd you do to this thing?

I dropped it
from the top of my house.

Gene's mower shop...
the great suburban leveler.

Yeah, it's the carburetor.

How much?

Have to look it up.

I don't know if they make parts
for these things anymore.

Wise guy.

Come on, Dad,
let's take a look around.

Why not?

In a world where male bonding
was at a minimum,

this place was a treasure trove
of guy things...

blowers, mulchers,
four-pronged widgets.

You could find
almost anything here.

- There's the clutch.
- Cool!

Including Al Pfeiffer
on a tractor

the size of a Sherman tank.

- Dad?
- Huh?

Jack!

Hey, there.

Alvin, what the hell are you
doing on that thing?

You know,
just checking her out.

Okay, nothing wrong with that.

That's a lot of mower.

You betcha.

Yep, we were sharing

a time-honored
tribal tradition here...

eating our guts out over a hunk
of big-dollar technology

no ordinary mortal
could ever...

okay, Mr. Pfeiffer.

We'll have her wrapped up
and delivered by this afternoon.

Uh-oh.

You bought it, Al?

Well, I figure you only
live once, right, Jack?

[ Chuckles ]
Oh, how about you, sir?

She's got 11 horses,

a 47-inch cutting deck
with reversible blades.

Interested?

Now, possibly this guy
was new on the job.

Unhunh.

Oh, come on, sir.
You know what they say.

"Your neighbors will be green
with envy."

Or maybe he was just looking
to start a neighborhood war.

I got a mower.

A good one.

In any event...

[ Creaking ]

Okay, I can fix it.

But I can't promise it's gonna
last longer than six weeks.

Fine.

Okay.

We'll take it someplace else.

And at that moment,

there was really only one thing
to say.

Nice talking.

Uhhuh.

The thing is,
it was only a stupid mower.

Still, that afternoon,
I couldn't shake the feeling

there was more at stake here
than just...

- Whoa!
- ...Lawn care.

Showoff.

And as Dad set the tone,

something weird
began to happen.

So I made up my mind.

Whatever was going on between
my father and Mr. Pfeiffer...

I wasn't gonna let it get
to me and Paul. Hey.

So, why does your Dad need
that stupid lawnmower anyway?

Of course, Paul wanted
to smooth things over, too.

What the hell's
that supposed to mean?

Oh, come on. It's bigger
than your whole yard!

No, it's not bigger
than our whole yard.

So we discussed it in a calm
and mature fashion.

Well, it's bigger
than half your yard.

What is this, a math thing?

No, but... well, how are you
gonna turn it around?

In your neighbor's yard?

Admittedly,
this was getting off track.

What I really meant to say

in a sensitive
and caring manner was...

I mean, what's next?

You gonna join
some pansy country club?

Well, actually...
We already did.

Oh. This is brilliant.

First you go ahead
and buy this huge lawnmower,

and then you're gonna join
a stupid country club?

Hey, you're the one
who's being stupid!

Yep, we were really working
this thing out here.

I don't have time for this.
I got things to do.

Yeah, fine. So do I!

And with the fences
firmly mended

between the Arnolds
and the Pfeiffers,

we went home with our
friendship as solid as ever.

Over the next few days,

as the Pfeiffers continued
to parade their good fortune,

the Arnold community spirit
began to run a little thin.

Now he's putting in a pool.
Can you believe that guy?

Why can't we have a pool?

You want a pool? Start digging.

Goodwill was turning
to bad blood.

And as we closed ranks
around Dad,

the gap between him
and Paul's Dad got...

Wider.

With me in the middle.

Okay, Kevirooski.

Follow the light
with those peepers

and don't move your head.

Yes, sir.

The thing is, even though
I'd known the guy for years,

suddenly I was seeing him
in a whole new light.

Gotcha!

A little optometrist humor.

Pretty funny.

- Are we done now?
- Not yet.

Read that for me.

"E," "f," "p," "t," "c," "z."

Look at him... Mr. moneybags.

John D. Rockapfeiffer.

Not a care in the world.

You know, Kev, I'm worried.

Huh? About my eyes?

Unhunh. About your Dad.

What about him?

Well, I'm not sure.

He didn't look happy
the other day.

Is he okay?

Well, yeah, he's...

Oh, no.

I wasn't gonna give him
that satisfaction.

He works hard, that's all.

Unlike some rich guys
I could think of.

That's Jack, all right.
He's a hell of a guy.

Careful man.
Take that investment thing.

Great. I should have known.

This whole thing was just
another excuse to crow about...

he could have come in with me,
you know.

What?

We talked about it.

You did?

But he wasn't interested.

Too big a risk, I guess.

I couldn't believe my ears.

I don't know.

Maybe he was right.

These land things
tend to be complicated.

Unpredictable, risky.
Know what I mean?

But at that moment,

I wasn't interested in the
greater aspects of real estate.

I was thinking just one thing.

I can't believe it.

My Dad, who grumbled about
the Pfeiffers' good fortune,

could have had one himself.

Okay, sport.

Let's test
your depth perception.

And suddenly,
this whole situation

was starting to get kind of...

Fuzzy.

Damn.

That's great, Dad.

Now it matches the one
in the living room.

I don't understand this.

But Dad wasn't the only one
feeling confused.

So, how was your eye
appointment today, honey?

Fine, except Mr. Pfeiffer
said that...

oh, that reminds me.

Jack, Ida called today.

She invited us all
to the country club on Saturday.

Forget it. We're not going.

Why not?

Because.
We got other things to do.

What other things?

Things.

But, Jack, it's just that
I already accepted.

I-I thought it'd be fun,
and we haven't spent...

I said we're not going.

Of course, we all knew
what was going on here.

So I guess it was up to me
to put it all in perspective.

What's your problem, Dad?

I mean, it's his money,
isn't it?

He earned it. He took the risk.

Looking back,
it was one of those moments

that makes you really,
really proud

to have been a smart-aleck kid.

More potatoes, butthead?

Hey, everybody, this is
my twisting double jackknife!

Fairlawn Country Club...

watering spot
of the well-to-do,

where the glamorous went
to cavort.

It's fun, huh?

Not that my family were
strangers to the place.

We'd driven past the front
gates lots of times.

Yoohoo! Over here!

Oh, brother.

Jack.

Let's get this over with.

Guess you could say
we were all in a festive mood.

I'm so glad you could come.

Oh, it's lovely here.
Isn't it lovely, Jack?

Where's Alvin?

Oh, he'll be joining us
in a while.

He had some business calls
to make.

Is anyone thirsty?

- Sure.
- No.

Right.

Hey, Kevin! Watch my swan dive!

Still, as country clubs go,
this wasn't so bad.

Nice surroundings,
pleasant company.

Hi.

Hey.

How's it going?

Okay.

And it seemed pretty clear

one of us had to
break the ice here.

So... You want to...
Do something?

So, when Paul offered
the old olive branch,

I jumped right on.

Like what, play tennis?

[ Ball bouncing ]

Service, Arnold.

[ Ducks quacking ]

I thought you said
you played before.

Of course I played before.

As in twice.

Let me serve.

No, don't worry about me.
I can serve.

After all, maybe I wasn't
Mr. country club,

but I could hold my own.

Look, you want a few tips?

Tips?

What did I look like,
his personal waiter?

I got it.

Here, let me serve.
I've been taking lessons.

Fine. You want to serve? Serve.

Lessons, tips, tennis.

Who'd this guy think he was
anyway, the Great Gatsby?

In retrospect, it was the straw
that broke this pauper's back.

And in that instant,
I only wanted one thing...

to knock him flat on his ascot.

Aaah.

Paul?

Paul?!

Paul?

Polo, anyone?

How's your head, honey?

Fine, Mom. I'm fine.

An hour later, the celebration
was in full swing.

And the party
was just getting started.

Sorry I'm late, guys.

It was grim.

Here we were, two families who
grew up practically next door,

with nothing to say
to each other but...

Anybody got
any more saltines, huh?

Face it.

Money had come between us.

Two decades
of neighborly goodwill

had run aground
on a few measly acres

of beachfront
investment property.

And there was nothing any of us
could do to make it better.

I'd like to make a toast.

Except, of course,
make a toast.

We've known each other
for many years.

We've worked together,
broken bread together,

birthed our children together.

We've seen each other
through good and bad.

So, in a way...

Your good fortune
is our good fortune.

And I just want to say
how proud we are of you.

To you and your success
and all the joy it brings.

We hope it's just the beginning.

I guess human dignity
can be a powerful force.

Grace untrammeled
can move mountains.

Congratulations, Alvin.

I'm happy for you.

Mmhmm.

Me too.

And in that simple moment,
with those simple gestures,

you could feel a burden lift.

It was wonderful.

[ Sobbing ]

It was... Horrible.

Al.

Honey?

It's gone.

What?

I said, "it's gone."

The whole investment.

The whole shebang.

Oh, God.

Not the beach, Dad!

Underwater... all of it.

His face told the tale.

One phone call,
and the Pfeiffer fortunes

had landed
on the continental shelf.

[ Boat engine roaring,
bell ringing ]

So, of course, being neighbors,

there was only one thing
we could do.

Waiter?

Double steak sandwich.
Make it fast, huh?

[ Sobbing ]

Nobody talked much
the rest of that afternoon

or on the way home.

I guess we were all
a little sobered

by the knowledge that
the fortune of an optometrist

could vanish
in the blink of an eye.

Where are you going, honey?

Just for a walk.

Not that I needed the exercise.

Somehow I knew I couldn't leave
things the way they'd ended up.

Not with me and Paul.

Hey.

How's your head?

I'll live.

Hmm.

Seemed we were just plumb
out of olive branches here.

Look, it was an honest mistake.

I mean, you hit the ball to me,
and I hit it back.

You didn't...

will you forget about
the darn ball?!

I don't want to talk about
the ball, okay?!

Okay.

Sheesh.

Tennis is a drag anyway.

I hate this.

I wasn't sure if he meant me
or the grass clippings or...

He's a fine optometrist,
you know.

Oh.

He's a leader in his field.

The thing is, I'd been so busy
tearing down my own Dad,

I guess I'd forgotten Paul
had one to tear down, too.

Sure.

'Course.

I mean, it's not like
he's broke or anything.

He does okay.

Right?

Well...

I wanted to tell him
that he had nothing to fear,

that any man who could produce
a son like Paul

was a giant in my book.

You'll probably have to
take the mower back.

But other than that...

He's one of the greats.

You think so?

Even if his beach
was underwater.

Shove over.

You really got me.

At the end of that semester,

Paul left his prep school
and came to McKinley with me.

In a way, I think
he was happy about it.

I know I was.

As for the Arnolds
and Pfeiffers,

we patched things up.

After all, some things are
more lasting than real estate.

And Mr. Pfeiffer?

Think of it this way...

nothing ventured,
nothing gained.

Besides, you never knew
when the tide might go out.

[ Waves crashing ]

[ Bell ringing ]

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