Original subtitles

? What would you do if I sang out of tune? ?

? Would you stand up and walk out on me? ?

? Lend me your ears, and I'll sing you a song ?

? I will try not to sing out of key, yeah ?

? Oh, baby, I get by ? ? By with a little help from my friends ?

? All I need is my buddies ?

? High with a little help from my friends ?

? I'm sayin' I'm gonna get higher ? -? Try with a little help from my friends ?

? Whoa-oa-oa-oa ?

? Oh, oh, oh, oh ?

? Somebody who knows quite sure ?

? Baby ?

? By with a little help from my friends ?

? Said I'm gonna make it with my friends ?

? Try with a little help from my friends ?

? Oh, I'm gonna keep on trying ?

? High with a little help from my friends ?

? I'm gonna keep on trying now, baby ?

? Ooh, ooh, ooh ?

[ Cheering ]

There's one in every high school in America...

the trophy case,

filled with winged statues and silver-plated victory cups,

all monuments to the winning spirit,

to team play, to greatness on the field.

[ Whistle blows ]

Not just anyone could get inside that case.

[ Whistle blows ]

You had to be a winner.

[ Growls ]

You had to have determination.

Set! 15! 22! 35!

- You had to have... - [ Growls ]

Guts.

[ Grunts ]

[ Whistle blows ] And most importantly...

Arnold, over here.

You had to make the cut.

Yeah, coach?

You gave it everything you got today, son.

Thanks! Does that mean I make the team?

You got to be joking. Hit the showers.

Hut! Hut!

That fall of my sophomore year, one thing was clear.

No matter how hard I tried,

the wide world of sports wasn't wide enough to include me.

"Face it. I was 5'4" and 110 pounds.

What team could I play on?

And that's when it hit me.

Sorry. Slipped away from me.

That's okay. What's this?

It's a soccer ball. Why?

Well, nothing. I just haven't seen many around.

Keep in mind this was 1971.

Soccer hadn't yet become the national pastime it is today.

So, do you play?

Oh, sure. I kick it around a little.

[ Chuckles ] Great.

Actually, I'm on the team.

Call it a revelation.

- The team? - The soccer team.

We started practice yesterday.

Wait a minute. Our school has a soccer team?

New this year. Pretty cool, huh?

Consider, if you will, the thoughts

that ran through my head.

"A," McKinley high had a team no one knew about,

and, "b"...

- This doofus was on it. - Ow.

Which led to "c."

Where do you guys practice?

Third auxiliary football field

down by the brook, through the woods.

Why, you interested?

"D." It was worth a look.

But what I saw when I got there

was the biggest collection of dorks

since my 4th-grade cotillion class

playing on a moth-eaten field

that was halfway to grandma's house.

This was definitely not for me.

Hey, you!

Glad you showed up.

We're pioneering the uncharted universe here.

- Great. - Uh-huh.

But, uh...

I don't think I really... Fit in.

Why? I think you'd be great.

And, besides, we're one guy short.

Yeah, well...

Thanks for telling me about it, anyway.

Hey, being on a team was one thing.

But playing with these jokers?

Hey, a little help?

Kick it back!

Wow.

Where did you learn how to do that?

What?

Kick like that.

I don't know. Lucky, I guess.

Yeah, well, good shot...

Superstar.

The amazing thing was, these guys were serious.

So, you gonna join us?

And that's when I realized...

in the land of the blind, the one-eyed man is king.

Well...

Maybe I'll go talk to the coach.

Great!

He... he's over there. Pops McIntyre.

Go ahead.

[ Sighs ]

It was kind of a big moment...

the future superstar stepping up to the man

who would shape his athletic career.

Coach McIntyre?

The manwith all the answers.

The man...

You bring my juice?

Who wanted juice.

Uh... No.

Hot as hell out here, isn't it?

Yeah. It is.

So, what can I do for you?

Well, actually, I came to sign up for the team.

Why's that?

Obviously, the coach didn't realize

he was in the presence of such raw talent.

Well, maybe you saw the way

I just kicked the ball over there?

Yeah, I saw it.

On the other hand,

this guy didn't just want another hotdogger.

He wanted sincerity.

Listen, I don't know that much about soccer,

but I'd be willing to learn and give it my best.

I just want to be part of the team.

Is that so?

And with that, our bond was forged...

the bond of trust, admiration, respect.

So, I guess we'll be working together.

Suit yourself. Where's my juice?!

No question about it. It was the dawn of a new era.

Soccer?

Isn't that where they use the brooms

to sweep in front of a little thingy?

That's curling, Mom.

Soccer's where little boys chase the ball around

in shorts and knee socks.

Shut up, butthead!

Well, I'm very proud of you, honey.

Thanks, Mom.

Who's coaching?

Nobody.

Nobody?

Well, just some old guy named McIntyre.

McIntyre. Pops McIntyre?

You know him?

[ Chuckles ]

He was only the greatest football coach

the school ever had.

Really?

Sure. Guy was a legend.

Yeah, that guy was one hell of a coach.

They called him "the bear."

Hmm.

Hard to believe the man my father was talking about

was the same pops McIntyre.

The bear... always pacing, always growling.

He never sat down.

[ Bear growls ]

Well, think of it this way.

Maybe the bear was hibernating.

Pops?

[ Clears throat ] Pops?

Kick it back?

Pops?

Anybody got another ball? It just didn't add up.

What was with this guy?

So, how we doing?

Fine, fine.

Well, what do you think about our prospects

for this season?

Terrific. Where's my cushion?

I know I left it somewhere.

At least one thing seemed clear.

When it came to coaching, this coach couldn't care less.

Of course, maybe there was a reason for that.

Take Nick Bott, for example...

the most uncoordinated kid I ever met.

Not to mention the biggest "Star Trek" fan.

And Andy Collin. I never saw a lazier kid.

And who could forget Chuck Coleman, "Mr. Fidget"?

The kid meant well enough,

but he elevated annoying to an art form.

[ Grunts ]

And Leigh Fitzpatrick.

Sweet guy but a bundle of nerves.

All in all, we were a team

that could most charitably be described as...

What the hell was that?

Do you need some help there?

Nope. Everything's under control.

[ Sighs ]

Guys, I think we are really getting good out there!

Yeah, we only kicked the ball over the fence

three times today.

Dorks, goof balls, a coach who wouldn't coach.

Somehow, this whole thing

wasn't working out the way I'd planned.

What do you think, Kev?

About what?

Well, about how things are going.

Well...

I don't know, guys.

I mean, I'm new here, but...

Doesn't it seem like something's missing?

Missing? Well, like what?

Well, I mean, we are playing soccer, right?

So, maybe we should start learning some plays.

Of course, it was only a suggestion.

Still...

Plays.

Great idea!

It was like watching Edison invent the light bulb.

What can I do for you?

Well... We... we wanted to talk about learning some plays.

Plays?

Look, it's not that we don't appreciate

what you've done for us so far.

It's just that...

Plays?

Well, look. What about this playbook?

Well, those are plays.

Well, can we at least work from it?

I don't think that book's gonna do you a lot of good.

Still, even pops couldn't quell the tide of youth...

Enthusiasm...

Dorkdom.

But...

If you want to learn plays...

Suit yourself.

- Terrific! - Great!

Great! Thanks!

And there you had it.

Guys, we got plays!

Sure, it wasn't much, but it was a start.

And who knew?

Maybe with the right combination

of coaching and raw talent,

we'd actually make something of ourselves.

Okay, 17!

34! Set back!

Okay, 24! Red right!

And... Hike!

[ Screaming ]

Or maybe, just maybe...

It was gonna be the longest season in recorded history.

After the great football-playbook fiasco,

lesser men might have hung it up.

But for some reason, my teammates hung in there.

Maybe we were really trying to get good.

Maybe we were just trying to get pops

to pay attention to us.

In any event, it wasn't working.

[ Snoring ]

[ Metal clanging ]

Pretty soon, morale began to plummet.

Team spirit hit an all-time low.

As for me,

my dreams of glory on the playing field were fading...

Fast.

[ Bell rings ]

There was only one thing to do.

Pops, can I talk to you?

About what?

Well, about the team.

- The soccer team. - Oh, that.

You see...

Our first game's coming up in a few days.

And...

How to put this tactfully.

It's not gonna be pretty.

[ Sighs ] Yeah.

It's gonna be a massacre.

Mmhmm.

But we still have time, don't we?

I mean...

With a little practice, we could at least be...

Respectable.

Don't you think?

Figured the least he could do here was throw me a bone.

I wouldn't count on it.

Not exactly your basic ringing endorsement.

Wait a minute. I don't get it.

My Dad told me you used to be this great coach.

"The bear," they called you.

You won six conference titles in a row.

He told you that?

Yeah.

Did he tell you about that '57 team?

[ Chuckles ] Great bunch of boys.

[ "Notre Dame victory march" plays ]

And for just a second,

I actually saw a spark of real enthusiasm in the guy.

Ah, but that was then. My coaching days are over now.

Why?

They didn't want me. Got a younger man.

Put me out to pasture until, uh... Until this.

I did my best not to take it personally.

Yeah, but...

Pops, we're a team, and we need a coach.

There... a cry from the heart,

something even pops couldn't deny.

One year away from my pension,

and they saddle me with this.

Soccer.

Game day.

The good news was we had new uniforms.

The bad news was...

Hey. Is it okay if we trade?

8 is my lucky number. - Sure.

We were the same team inside them.

Still, for some reason...

Call me crazy, call me naive,

but I think we really have a chance today.

Come on! Let's go!

These jokers just weren't giving up.

[ Chanting "Knights" ]

Maybe it was a tribute to the human spirit,

the power of positive thinking,

the triumph of will over adversity.

[ Chanting stops ]

- Or... - Oh, my God.

Maybe it was plain stupidity.

Are those guys for real?

Our opponents could have passed

for the Italian national all-stars,

leaving us only one small glimmer of hope.

Maybe it'll rain.

? Ow! ?

[ Whistle blows ]

? Oh, whoo ?

? Say it, now ?

[ Whistles ]

? Ooh, I'm back ?

? I'm back ?

? I'm back ?

? Get up off of that thing ?

? And dance till you feel better ?

? Get up off of that thing ?

That afternoon, we gave it all we had.

? Get up off of that thing ?

? And dance till you feel better ?

We threw ourselves into it.

? And try to release that pressure ?

? Get up off of that thing ?

We did our dead-level best.

Unfortunately...

? Say it, now ?

? Get up off of that thing ?

? And shake till you feel better ?

Our dead-level best stunk.

? And try to release that pressure ?

? Get up off ?

Pretty soon, our problem was clear.

[ Grunting ]

? So good ?

It was our goalie's fault.

? Whoo! Yeah! ?

? Follow me! ?

? Get up off of that thing ?

? And shake till you feel better ?

But by halftime...

? Get up off of that thing ?

? And shake till, say it now ?

? Get up off of that thing ?

? And shake till you feel better ?

We'd run out of scapegoats.

? And try to release that pressure ?

? Get up off of that thing ?

? Twist till you feel better ?

? Get up off of that thing ?

? Unh! ?

11zip, I can't believe it.

I hate this stupid game.

It was horrible.

We were getting our noses rubbed it in.

Clearly what was needed here was a pickup,

a pep talk, a little Knute Rockne-ian guidance.

[ Sighs ]

I don't want to go back out there.

And suddenly, I was seeing red.

Guys, I got something to say.

If pops wouldn't step forward, I would.

Look, we might not be the best soccer team that ever played.

In fact, we may not even be very good,

or any good... At all.

Hmm. Possibly I was on a bad tack here.

So I say let's forget about what's happened so far,

and let's start thinking about what might happen.

Okay?

Let's go!

And as I ran out of that locker room,

I had just one thought.

I only hoped someone was following me.

[ Door closes ]

[ Whistle blows ]

When I got back on that field, I was mad.

[ Sighs ]

I'd take these guys on myself, if I had to.

Hey! Wait for us!

[ Rossini's "William tell overture" plays ]

And when that whistle blew... [ Whistle blows ]

We actually got possession of the ball.

Over here!

And what's more amazing... we actually completed a pass.

Back to me! Back to me!

Go, Leigh! Come on!

[ Cheering ]

[ Whistle blows ]

It was our finest hour.

Unfortunately...

[ Squeaking ]

We'd kicked the ball into the wrong net.

I don't believe it!

You scored on our goal, bozo.

Don't call me bozo, Spock brain!

Hey!

Listen, would you jerks just break it up?!

- Who you calling a jerk?! - This is ridiculous!

Who needs this?! I don't need this!

Look, you guys, just calm down!

[ Indistinct shouting ]

We completely fell apart.

It was like "Lord of the Flies."

[ Shouting continues ]

And that's when it happened.

Look!

Pops was heading towards us to say it was over...

that we had no hope of winning,

that it was time to hang it up.

[ Sighs ]

Kick it that way.

I don't know what it was that touched him.

Maybe it was the way we stuck together.

Maybe it was the way we were tearing apart.

In that brief instant,

pops McIntyre became a coach again.

[ Thunder crashes ]

And we were finally a team.

Come on, guys. Let's lose one for pops.

[ Thunder crashes ]

Sure, we lost that day, but it was a glorious defeat.

After all, all over America, there were teams like ours,

teams that marched bravely into slaughter,

teams that went 0-15 and kept on losing

and kept on trying...

not for the league titles

or the silver-plated victory cups

but just for the joy of playing...

Together.

[ Whistle blows ]

The thing is...

I'll never forget those guys...

Even if they were dorks.

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