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? What would you do if I sang out of tune? ?
? would you stand up and walk out on me? ?
? lend me your ears, and I'll sing you a song ?
? I will try not to sing out of key, yeah ?
? oh, baby, I get by ? ? By with a little help from my friends ?
? all I need is my buddies ?
? high with a little help from my friends ?
? I'm sayin' I'm gonna get higher? ? Try with a little help from my friends ?
- ? whoa-oa-oa-oa, yeah ? - ? Ooh, ooh, ooh ?
As seventh grade wore on, I began to have nightmares.
I'm walking into sort of a... a cave.
A long, dark tunnel.
I think Paul and Winnie are with me.
But... but then they're not. I'm all alone.
I don't even know why I'm going into the cave.
I-i-I'm terrified.
But I just know that I have to keep going, deeper and deeper,
So deep that it's like I can't even remember
What the daylight is like anymore.
And suddenly... [ thunder crashes ]
I'm in second-period math class.
[ laughter ]
In pajamas.
With feet.
[ gasps ]
I guess I was under a lot of stress.
There are a lot of things about junior-high life
That might seem simple to an outsider, but they're not.
Take the 15 minutes before homeroom every morning.
What you do with those 15 minutes
Says pretty much everything there is to say
About you as a human being.
If you were cool, you had places to go, people to see.
And if you weren't...
Do you want to stand, or do you want to walk around?
Well, what did we do yesterday?
We walked around for a while, and then we stood.
Well, let's... Stand around for a while,
Then we'll walk.
The crucial thing was to never let the conversation die.
Then you'd look like two guys with nothing to do.
[ humming ]
Hi, you guys.
Winnie! Hi!
Look, Kevin! It's Winnie!
It was Winnie, all right.
Winnie, who had dumped me, stomped on my heart,
Left me in the dust
For a lousy eighth-grader named Kirk McCray.
But I had my dignity. I wouldn't let it show.
Hi.
Hi.
So, did you have a good weekend?
Okay, now. Be carefree, yet restrained.
Aloof, yet available at the drop of a hat.
Yeah, sure. It was fine.
Good. Good.
So... Do you guys want to walk around?
Okay.
Steady, boy. Steady!
Where's Kirk?! Don't you want to walk around with him?!
Oh, nice goin'. Very smooth.
You guys are still my friends.
Hey, Winnie! Hey, Winnie!
Hey, Winnie, come over here!
I think Kirk wants to tell you something!
Come on! Winnie, come on!
Uh, I think you better go over there,
Or she might pop a vein in her head or something.
We wouldn't want that to happen.
Yeah, well...
I guess I'll see you guys later.
Yeah, later.
And that's when it hit me.
This thing was bigger than Kirk McCray.
Our Winnie was ascending like an angel
Into junior-high heaven.
Our Winnie was becoming a cool kid.
Psst. What'd you get for number 1?
No way. Get outta here.
Oh, come on, man. Don't be such a wuss.
Forget it. Get outta here.
Don't worry about it.
The old bag can't even hear herself fart.
Just let me...
Get outta here, you jerk!
"Get outta here, you jerk."
Gary Cosay. You know the type.
The kind of guy who, at the tender age of 12๏ฟฝ,
Looks like he shouldn't come out by day.
Psst. What'd you get for number 1?
What a joker.
This guy thought he was so cool,
People would just be waiting in line to give him their answers.
X equals 7.
See? Did he burst into flames?
Hey, what can I say?
It just seemed like the thing to do at the time.
And look, it happened once, okay?
Let's not make a huge deal out of it.
What'd you get for 2?
Y is greater than or equal to 14.
Great minds think alike. That's what I got.
Psst. Hey, man. Come on.
[ Sighs ]
Kevin, are you crazy? You're gonna get caught.
Paul, forget it.
Forget it? What do you mean, forget it?
Paul. Look.
Ritvo's gonna nail you.
She's not as stupid as she looks, you know.
Thank you, Mr. Pfeiffer.
You're welcome?
Detention.
Paul and I were a tad out of our element.
My hunch was that one or two of our colleagues
Were repeat offenders.
I felt like Dennis the Menace on a chain gang
With Lee Harvey Oswald and the Boston Strangler.
I thought you said she couldn't hear herself fart.
Yeah, well, I guess you talk louder than she farts.
My mother's gonna kill me.
Relax, man. Your mother's never gonna find out.
Oh, yeah, like my mother's
Just gonna sign my detention slip
And forget to look at it.
What's her first name?
Ida.
Ida...
Pfeiffer.
Life's not that hard, man.
Take it easy.
Norma.
You can't just do that.
Why not?
Paul was right. What was I thinking?
Cheating in class, forging my mother's name...
This wasn't me.
Yeah, why not?
[ News broadcast playing on radio ]
Kevin, it's almost dark out. Where have you been?
I was with Paul, Mom.
[ Thunder rumbles ]
That night, I had another nightmare.
I'm back in the cave.
I can't see a thing. It's total blackness.
I take a step, and then, suddenly, I'm falling.
I-I try to grab on to anything I can,
But there's nothing there.
I just keep falling and falling,
And then, finally, I hit something.
[ crash ]
Math class again.
[ laughter ]
In my underwear.
[ gasps ]
[ Locker door slams ]
You know what it is? It's the contacts.
Ever since she got contacts, she thinks she's so cool.
She's turned into a real snob.
You know when my mother took me to get contacts
And I found out I'm allergic to them?
Well, now I'm glad.
I'd much rather wear glasses and be a nice person
Than contacts and be a snob.
I can't believe she thinks she's better...
Paul! Who cares what she thinks?
Yeah, who cared?
So what if Winnie was making new friends?
We were making new friends, too.
Hey, man. Can you do me a favor?
Sure. What?
Could you keep this in your locker till lunch?
Um, sure. No sweat.
[ Sighs ] what is it?
Hey. You're paranoid, man. You know that?
It's just some stuff I need for Friday night.
Well, what's Friday night?
Uh, you know, sometimes
I just crash out in the woods all night.
Yeah?
Yeah, my old lady's always hassling me.
Sometimes, you know, I just got to get out.
Yeah, I know what you mean.
You do?
Yeah. My old lady's the same way.
Yeah? Hey, look, if you guys want to come, man, that's cool.
- No, thanks. - Yeah, sure!
Yeah, like my mother's just gonna want me
To sleep out in the woods.
Just tell her you're sleeping over at my house.
Don't be so paranoid, man.
A cheap trick... turning a 12-year-old's sense of manhood
Against his sense of intelligence.
Okay.
Cheap, but dependable.
Keep the change.
Come on. Let's walk around for a while.
I could tell Paul was wondering
Why I wanted to do it,
Why I was acting this way, why I even liked this guy.
The truth is, if he had asked me straight out,
I wouldn't have been able to answer him.
Hi, you guys.
Oh, hi.
The night before the campout, I had another dream.
I'm carrying Winnie through the cave.
She's in great pain. I think her leg is broken.
I've got to get her to help.
[ thunder crashes ]
[ Panting ]
You got to help us!
It's her leg! I think it's broken!
[ laughter ]
[ Gasps, breathing heavily ]
So, who is this Gary character?
Just a kid at school. Right, Paul?
Yeah, just a kid from school.
Well, how do you know him?
From school.
He's in our math class.
Is he a good student?
I think he got the same grade as I did on the last quiz.
Well, I think I better just call his mother anyway and see.
Mom. Come on.
We're gonna be right behind his house.
And his Mom is gonna be right there the whole time.
Go ahead.
Here's the number.
Call her if you want.
I mean, what's the difference if you trust me or not?
Talk about a cheap trick.
God, I hope my mother doesn't call your mother.
She won't.
I hope your mother doesn't call Gary's mother.
She won't.
I hope Gary's Mom doesn't call...
Paul!
Hey, man. Sorry I'm late. I had to get some stuff.
No problem. We brought some stuff, too.
Great. What do you got?
Lots of good stuff.
Look, we got some marshmallows,
Some Kool-Aid.
I think there's some Twinkies in here somewhere. Oh, here.
Oh, and I got a snakebite kite too, just in... Case.
I can see it's gonna be up to me
To liven you guys up a little.
[ Cream's "sunshine of your love" plays ]
All right, I'd been into this so far,
But this was ridiculous.
I mean, what did this kid plan to do...
Smoke 900 cigarettes in 3 hours?
If he thought it made him look tough or something,
He was mistaken.
I mean, smoking cigarettes just proves you're stupid.
It was pathetic.
Got an extra butt?
? When lights close their tired eyes ?
? I'll soon be with you, my love ?
? give you my dawn surprise ?
? I'll be with you, darling, soon ?
It relaxes me.
No, thanks. I don't smoke.
Yeah, you can start on the brew, Pfeiffer.
Unless you'd rather have Kool-Aid.
I couldn't believe it... a can of beer?
A 16-ounce can of beer?!
This thing was going too far.
Thank god Paul, at least, had a level head.
Go on, Paul. Just say it. Say... just say "no."
Just say "no."
Just say "no."
[ sighs ] well, let's face it...
Kids in those days were not as smart as kids today.
? I'm with you, my love ?
God, I love to party.
I could party 24 hours a day, man.
? Yes, I'm with you, my love ?
Yeah.
Me too, man.
You know the band "purple Andy"? They go to central.
- Yeah. Yeah. Sure. - Sure.
I usually party with them.
My girlfriend goes to central, too.
She got honkers out to here, man.
Whoa!
[ Gulping ]
You guys goin' out with anybody?
Nah. Not right now.
Used to be going out with this girl Winnie Cooper.
We broke up.
Whoa! Yeah, Winnie... she's pretty cute.
A little flat, but cute, man.
Kevin likes 'em flat. [ chuckles ]
Gimme a butt, man!
I thought you didn't smoke.
Only when I drink. [ Chuckles ]
Yeah, well, Carla Healey's no Raquel Welch, Paul.
She's got a handful.
Yeah, like you'll ever know.
You can't go out with one girl for too long.
Before you know it, they, like,
Want you to walk them in the hall every day and stuff.
- Yeah, no. - Yeah, no.
I was starting to feel a little better
About this whole Winnie Cooper thing.
Hell, she was flat.
And I'd be damned if I was gonna walk with her every day.
Give me another hit.
[ Exhales deeply ]
[ laughing ]
What?
What, man?
Iii don't know.
Let's go do something.
Like what?
I don't care! Anything!
I know.
About a quarter-mile from here, there's a cave.
It's really cool.
Did he say... A cave?
I couldn't believe it. It was just like my dream.
I wanted to stop, but something kept propelling me forward.
Beneath my placid, innocent, suburban world
Lurked a subterranean land of nightmare.
And I was about to enter it.
Okay. That was fun. Let's go back.
What are you talking about, man?
That's not a cave. That's a sewer.
I'm not going in a sewer.
It's not a sewer. It's a storm drain.
Come on, Kevin. Don't be paranoid, man!
My god. I'd created a monster.
You know what it's called when you explore a cave? -What?
Hey, you know what it's called when you explore a cave? -What?
Hey, hey, you guys, you know what it's called... -What?!
Spelunking! [ Laughs ]
Say it, don't spray it, Paul.
Spelunking, lunking, lunking, lunking, lunking!
I think I liked Paul better
Before he became such a fun guy.
Okay, this is it.
Isn't this cool?
[ Water trickling ]
Wow, man. This is great.
This pipe comes all the way from Crestview Shopping Center.
You can crawl up in there and wind up right behind sears.
Cool!
This one comes from over by the rec center,
Near where the men's room is.
Wow.
I know I was impressed.
And this one...
Nobody knows...
Where this one goes.
Shh!
I thought I heard something.
There was a guy once who went into that pipe
To try to find out where it went.
He never came out.
They say he starved to death.
And then there was this big storm,
And this whole thing flooded, and he drowned.
They didn't find him till six months later.
Okay. Now I was really scared.
And like any 12-year-old boy
Who's trying not to show that he's scared,
I got argumentative.
Wait a minute. Which one was it?
Did he starve to death or did he drown?
Both.
No, you can't do both. It's either one or the other.
How do you know?!
Because it doesn't make any sense.
I mean, he can get really, really hungry and then drown,
Or he can starve to death.
But then he can't drown, because he'd be already dead.
Hey, man, look, all right? I knew this guy.
He was a friend of mine's cousin.
So that means he can die twice?
Alls I know is they just found parts of him.
The rats ate the rest.
Unless...
There are still parts of him in there.
Let's get out of here.
Hey, you were the one who wanted
To come in here in the first place.
That's before I knew there were dead-body parts.
Shh!
I heard it again. Listen.
[ Moaning ]
Shut up, Gary.
Come on, Gary. Stop.
Stop it. Come on, Gary! Stop!
I'm dying!
Help me!
Ohh, I'm dying!
I'm not kidding, Gary! Knock it off!
Shut up, Gary!
Cut it out!
I'm dying!
Shut up!
Stop it, Gary! Stop it!
[ Moaning ]
Shut up!
Ow! My leg!
Paul, you okay?
Stop it! Stop it!
Shut up, you jerk!
[ Chuckles ] god, I can't believe you guys.
You're really scared?
Aww. What's the matter, Pfeiffer? Are you crying?
God, I can't believe you. You're crying.
You're a real Jackass. You know that?
Ohh, I'm dying! Ohh!
Shut up!
Just shut... The hell... Up!
Oh, I'm dying! Ohh!
[ laughs ]
Ohh, I'm dying!
Ohhhhh!
Hey. Hey, where are you guys going?
Hey, come on. I was just kidding.
When I look back on it now, I feel sorry for Gary.
When all was said and done, he was just a little kid.
And I guess he needed friends.
But all Paul and I knew that night
Was that we wanted to go home.
Kevin? What are you doing here?
Did something happen?
Are you okay?
Yeah, we're fine. We just felt like coming home.
It was the truth.
But not the whole truth.
And looking at my Mom and my Dad
Standing there in their bathrobes, worried about me,
I felt a little sick about that.
Well, come on in. It's cold out there.
Honey, you should have called us.
We would have come to pick you up.
Paul, are you limping?
It looks to me like you're limping.
I don't know why, but that night,
For the first time in a long time,
I didn't have a single nightmare.
That's orange!
No, it's not. It's red.
Look at the Orlando Cepeda. They're both the same.
No way! But that's, like, practically maroon!
But it's the same team.
[ sighs ] hi, you guys.
- Hi. - Hi.
Are you guys mad at me?
What do you mean?
Well, yesterday in the hall...
You just looked like you were mad at me.
I don't know what you're talking about.
Yeah, me neither.
Okay. Forget it.
Hey, Winnie.
Um...
How come you're wearing your glasses?
Huh?
How come you're wearing your glasses?
Oh, I lost one of my contacts.
I look so stupid in these things.
No, you don't.
You look good.
I'm serious!
You look much smarter.
In fact, Paul and I were just saying the other day
How dumb you look in contacts.
Weren't we, Paul?
- Oh, yeah. Tell me about it. - No, really.
I'm surprised your teachers haven't started grading you down
Just because you look dumb.
Oh, you're one to talk.
Hey, I'm just being honest. I would not lie about this.
Would I lie about this, Paul?
I've known him for 12 years, and he would not lie about this.
You definitely look stupid in contacts.
You guys!
Who's gonna tell you these things, if not your friends?
[ Indistinct conversation ]
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