Original subtitles

‐ All right, guys.

I called this emergency band meeting

to talk about last night's gig.

‐ What gig? No one showed up

because Phoebe decided to throw an ice skating party.

‐ Uh. You're right, meeting adjourned.

‐ [gavel bangs]

‐ How'd she even find a frozen pond?

It was like 90 degrees out yesterday.

‐ Obviously, she froze it with her...

icy heart.

You guys are finally finding out what I've known all along.

Phoebe Thunderman, not a nice person.

‐ Hey, boys, I brought you some cookies.

‐ Sweet‐ches!

‐ You're so nice.

‐ Wolfgang.

‐ Guys! What did we just talk about?

‐ How could you?

‐ You're terrible.

‐ Wolfgang.

‐ Yeah, let's go, guys.

Don't tell, Max.

‐ So, it's Mom's birthday tonight.

Any ideas what we should get her?

‐ How 'bout an ice skating party?

‐ Nah, nothing'll beat last night's.

Wait. Are you mad about my ice skating party?

I invited you.

‐ Yes, along with the whole school,

which is why no one showed up

to see my band make rock history.

‐ Okay, other bands have played three songs without messing up.

‐ But we haven't!

‐ [indistinct yelling]

‐ Hey, you two, cool it.

‐ BOTH: With pleasure.

‐ [wind blowing] ‐ Stop it!

Come on, you guys, it's my birthday.

‐ BOTH: Happy Birthday.

‐ [wind blowing] ‐ Enough!

You two need to stop fighting all the time.

You know, my sister and I always fought, but‐‐

‐ But then you and Aunt Mandy realized family shouldn't fight,

and you rode off on a unicorn named Gilly

all the way to Best Friend Land.

‐ Okay, Gilly was our dog.

And you're ruining my story.

‐ Okay, Mom, if you and Aunt Mandy are besties,

how come we've never met her?

‐ You don't know how lucky you are you

to get to see your sister every day.

And if you don't unfreeze her, I'm gonna ground you.

‐ [wind blows]

‐ You know, can't you two, please,

just learn how to get along?

I mean, honestly, that would be

the best birthday gift you could give me.

‐ We're not giving her that gift, right?

‐ Yeah, no.

Especially 'cause I just came up with an even better gift.

We should track down Aunt Mandy

and invite her to Mom's birthday dinner.

‐ Still don't like you,

but that gift is the right price.

Free.

‐ [wind blowing]

‐ Oh, I'm sorry, did you say free or freeze?

Uh, I guess we'll never know.

‐ ♪

♪ What you see is not what you get ♪

♪ Living our lives with a secret ♪

♪ We fit right in, bet you'd never guess ♪

♪ Because we're living our lives just like all the rest ♪

♪ A picture‐perfect family is what we try to be ♪

♪ But closer you might see the crazy things we do ♪

♪ This isn't make‐believe ♪

♪ It's our reality ♪

♪ Just your average family trying to be normal ♪

♪ And stay out of trouble ♪

♪ Living a double life ♪

‐ Uh, Blackjack's totally my game. Hit me.

‐ Uh! ‐ Ah!

With the card, not your paw.

‐ Gotta read the sign more closely.

This isn't Blackjack, it's Slapjack.

Slapjack!

‐ Ah!

‐ Max, we have a problem.

‐ I know. You ruined my gig

and still think you're allowed to come into my room.

Colosso, hit her.

‐ In a minute.

I'm training a new waitress.

Ruby, only one cherry per drink.

‐ It's about Mom's present.

I got Aunt Mandy's number off her phone,

and I keep calling it, but no one's answering.

‐ Give me that.

I can use Aunt Mandy's number to triangulate her position.

‐ But she could be anywhere in the world.

[in accent] Paris, Hawaii, Barcelona.

‐ She's in Metroburg.

‐ That's so close. That's weird.

‐ And what's weird is you "Barcelona‐ed" all over my face.

‐ Okay, at least now we can go find her

and bring her home to Mom's birthday dinner tonight.

Thunder bump.

‐ No, sure.

How many bumps you want?

‐ ♪

‐ Since the dawn of time,

man has yearned for true deliciousness.

And thanks to your mother's birthday,

today, we shall taste it.

Behold, the chocolate munch cake.

‐ It's amazing.

‐ It's a work of art.

‐ It's going in my belly!

‐ Whoa, whoa!

No frosting swipes.

I flew a long way to get this cake

from a celebrity‐owned bakery your mom read about.

‐ A celebrity made that?

Was it one of those hamsters from that car commercial?

Now we know how they can afford those cars.

‐ All right, you two,

I'm putting you in charge of keeping my cake safe.

‐ You mean Mom's cake, right?

‐ I wish I did, Nora.

I wish I did.

‐ That's cool.

We've never been in charge of anything before.

‐ Yeah. It feels good knowing

Dad thinks we're responsible enough to‐‐[gasps]

Chloe, don't!

‐ She did a five‐finger swipe.

‐ And I'd do it again, baby.

‐ Okay, this is bad.

But we can fix it.

Chloe can teleport us to the bakery to get a new cake.

‐ Good idea.

Now we just have to get rid of the old cake.

‐ Told ya I'd do it again.

‐ ♪

‐ A globe shop, Max?

Sure we're in the right place?

‐ You're just mad we're in Metroburg

and not somewhere exotic like...

oh, [in accent] Fort Lauderdale.

Or...

‐ You spin it you buy it.

‐ Ah! ‐ Ah!

‐ Who are you two hooligans?

‐ Well, I am...Equator.

And this is my associate Phoebe Thunderman.

‐ Wait.

As in Phoebe and Max Thunderman?

‐ Who is this Max you speak of?

I am Equator.

‐ [thud]

‐ I'm your Aunt Mandy!

Ah, bring it in.

Come here, ahhh!

‐ Wow. It's so nice to finally meet you.

So are you like

using your invisibility to go undercover here?

‐ Of course she is.

Why else would a superhero

be in the most useless store in the world?

‐ I own this place.

‐ Oh, Phoebe, fix this.

‐ I don't get it.

How can you own this place?

Our Mom said you were so busy saving the world.

‐ I am.

See?

These little things mean the world to me.

‐ [laughs]

‐ Get it? [laughs]

That is gonna kill at Globe Con.

All six of us are gonna laugh so hard.

‐ Well, obviously, you've got your hands full

fighting the forces of uneven shelving.

But, uh, is there any way you would like to come to dinner

and surprise our mom for her birthday?

‐ Really?

We haven't seen each other in so long.

She should would be surprised.

‐ So...you'll come?

‐ Wouldn't miss it. ‐ [shrieks]

‐ Just let me bust this shoplifter first.

‐ Uh... had a big lunch.

‐ ♪

‐ Okay, let's hurry up and get the new cake

before Dad notices we're gone.

‐ Okay.

‐ Here you go.

‐ That's the celebrity Mom read about.

Deena the Dessert Diva.

‐ Who's she?

‐ She makes hilarious Twine videos

where she turns people into dessert dummies.

Check out this gold. ‐ [phone beeps]

‐ Bear claw attack.

[roaring]

‐ BILLY AND NORA: [laughing]

‐ Looks like somebody's glazed and confused.

‐ BILLY AND NORA: [laughing]

‐ Next.

Welcome to Bakery Home Tonight.

‐ One chocolate munch cake, please.

‐ That'll be 100 bucks.

Expensive, right?

I love being famous.

‐ Um, we're a little short.

‐ Mom says it's because we watch too much TV.

‐ If you don't have the cash,

there is another way you could pay.

You could be in my next Dessert Dummies video.

‐ So we'd be the ones getting pranked

in one of you Twine videos?

‐ Mm‐hmm.

‐ Yeah, that's not happening.

We'll come back with the cash.

‐ Chloe, did you frosting swipe again?

‐ I have a problem.

‐ ♪

‐ Oooh, an old penny!

We'll have that cake in no time.

‐ That's not a penny.

It's a linty mint.

‐ Hello, old friend.

‐ Billy, stop eating the couch mint.

It's time for your mom's birthday dinner!

[whispers] Get the cake ready.

‐ Are you sure?

Max and Phoebe aren't even home yet.

‐ We're home.

‐ Good, you're all here.

You're all gonna wanna see

the awesome birthday gift we got Mom.

‐ Oh, you kids didn't have to get me something.

[laughs] I'm just kidding!

Mama loves gifts.

Where it is?

‐ It's right here.

‐ Happy Birthday, Barbie.

‐ Mandy?

‐ Surprise.

‐ This party's going to be your worst nightmare.

‐ Surprise number two.

‐ ♪

‐ ♪

‐ [whispers] This may have been a horrible idea.

‐ I should have known better.

I got a sister for my birthday once.

My life's been a nightmare ever since.

‐ Nobody move.

It's a McBooger sister standoff.

‐ Mom's maiden name is McBooger?

She was Barbara McBooger?

‐ Let's see, what party game should we play first, huh?

Oooh, how 'bout kick the penguin?

‐ Yeah, that's not a party game.

‐ [crash]

‐ Way to go, Phoebe.

You can add "ruin Mom's birthday"

to the list of things you destroyed this week.

‐ We're not talking about your dumb gig right now.

We need to figure out

why the McBooger sisters hate each other.

Can't even say that with a straight face.

‐ So, you haven't told your Thunder‐lings

about our falling out?

‐ I didn't want them to see

how ugly it could get between siblings.

‐ Oh, you're right.

I won't let them see it.

Wet willy! ‐ Ah!

‐ Mandy!

Barb, isn't going to stoop to your level.

She is a mature adult!

‐ Eat lightning, Mandy Man Hands!

‐ [lighting flashes]

‐ MANDY: I'm over by Hank.

‐ [lightning flashes]

‐ MANDY: Ha‐ha, made you shoot.

‐ [crash]

‐ MANDY: Oopsie.

‐ [lightning flashes]

‐ Well, I guess this means

we'll have to cancel Mom's birthday dinner.

I'll go throw out the cake.

‐ Whoa, are you mad, girl?

No, take the cake to the backup frig in the garage

and stay there.

The safety of that cake is all I care about.

‐ What about us?

‐ Well, if I didn't care about you,

I wouldn't leave you in charge of my cake.

‐ Okay.

We need the new cake, but we don't have the money.

‐ I got it.

We hire a hypnotist to convince Mom she's a duck.

And ducks don't have birthdays.

This is where you say thank you.

‐ What is wrong with you?

‐ They don't know.

‐ Come on. Let's go.

‐ I can't find her anywhere!

‐ [crash]

‐ Found her.

Aunt Mandy, our mom is like the nicest person in the world.

How could you possibly be mad at her?

‐ It was 23 years ago. ‐ Ah!

‐ Your mother and I were part of a struggling breakdance duo

called The Electric McBooger Babes.

‐ Note to self, build a time machine

so I can go back to Mom's high school

and make fun of her and her sister.

‐ I booked us a huge gig.

But my big sis bailed on me

so she could go to some random girl's cape ceremony.

‐ Not cool, Mom.

‐ Well, it wasn't some random girl.

It was my best friend. Cherry.

‐ Mom‐‐ ‐ I'm making a point, Phoebe.

‐ Apologize for what you did to me.

‐ Fine, I'm sorry for missing one gig 20 years ago.

‐ It's so much more than that, Barb.

‐ Fine, 23 years ago.

‐ You still don't even see what this is about, do you?

And now you don't see me.

‐ Mandy, I wanted to stay out of this,

but you leave me no choice!

‐ MANDY: [laughing]

‐ Barb, do something about your sister.

‐ Oh, oh!

‐ [grunting] ‐ Okay.

‐ MANDY: Oh, take that.

[laughing]

‐ We'll handle this the way I always did when I was a kid.

‐ Ahhhh!

‐ MANDY: [laughing]

‐ Oh, sorry, Phoebe, your elbows won't fit.

See ya!

‐ Wait, nah‐‐ah!

‐ Yeah, Phoebe's safe.

‐ Just take care of the slide.

I already locked the door.

‐ [door slams]

‐ All right. Now if she tries to slide down,

she's gonna hit the‐‐ ‐ [metal bangs]

‐ MANDY: Didn't hurt.

You can't hide in there forever, Barbzilla.

‐ She's right.

We don't have any food.

‐ Or do we?

‐ You savages!

‐ Relax,

we're looking at the pile of sandwiches behind you.

‐ Oh, there's sandwiches.

‐ ♪

‐ Just let me know if you need anything else, okay?

I'm more than happy to get it.

Ah, well, well, well, look who's here.

‐ My brother and I are ready to be your Dessert Dummies.

‐ I'm bored of that idea.

I have a better one.

I smash desserts all over short stack here.

‐ But our deal was for you to smash dessert on Billy and me.

‐ Sorry, that deal expired.

‐ I got this, Nora.

You are a duck.

‐ ♪

‐ Can we check if Aunt Mandy's still upstairs?

My room's starting to smell like parents.

‐ Why is she still so mad at you, Mom?

‐ I don't know.

I already apologized for bailing on the Electric McBooger Babes.

I am so glad I married into a better name.

‐ Mm.

‐ Your sister's clearly crazy.

So what if you missed one little performance?

Let it go.

‐ I know, right?

‐ Really?

I don't think she should let it go.

[laughs] I don't think she's crazy.

‐ MANDY: I'm licking all your remotes!

‐ You were saying.

‐ You guys think Aunt Mandy's mad

about one little performance?

She told you it's way more than that.

Her sister didn't show up for something

that was important to her, and she's hurt.

‐ MANDY: Now I'm licking the door handles!

Ahhhh!

‐ See?

Hurt.

And in a couple of days, probably sick.

‐ Well, if it's really the problem,

she should have just told me.

‐ Well, maybe she's not the touchy feely type

who likes to talk about her feelings, Mom.

Maybe it's just easier for her to fight it out!

Now if you'll excuse me,

I'm gonna go help Aunt Mandy win this McBooger beef.

‐ [door slams]

‐ Guys...this might be crazy, but I think

when Max was talking about Aunt Mandy,

he was really talking about himself.

‐ Yeah, Dad, we got that part.

Wow.

Max isn't mad I ruined his gig.

He's mad I didn't show up.

He's really hurt.

‐ Yeah, Phoebe, we got that part.

‐ Well, sometimes people who seem the toughest

are the ones who are the most sensitive.

‐ Oh, Barbara, you finally see the real Dr. Colosso.

‐ I just hope Max doesn't ruin your birthday in 20 years.

‐ Well, it'll be his birthday, too.

‐ Making a point, Phoebe!

I just wish there was a way to fix all this.

‐ You know, maybe there's still a little time left

for some birthday magic.

‐ Did someone say magic?

Ruby, it's show time at the casino!

‐ ♪ ‐ [explosion]

‐ Ta‐da!

‐ What goes on down here?

‐ ♪

‐ Okay, so...

you're gonna order a cream puff.

And then I'll say, "Eat this, you Dessert Dummy."

And then kablamoo, you get hit

with that giant slingshot full of cream.

‐ How do you sleep at night?

‐ On piles of money.

And try to work in some tears.

I want this to go viral.

‐ Nora, I'm not sure about this.

‐ I am. It's gonna be awesome.

[laughs]

‐ Wait!

Deena, we can't let you kablamoo Chloe.

‐ Why?

‐ Because I wanna kablamoo her.

‐ Wait. What?

‐ Nora, what are you doing?

‐ Chloe's the one who got us into this mess.

I wanna be part of the payback.

‐ Older sister cream puffing little sister?

[gasps] It's mean and cute, just like me.

Let's shoot it.

All right, kid, the pain will fade.

But the Internet shame will last forever.

And...action.

‐ Can I have a cream puff?

‐ Eat this, you Dessert Dummy!

‐ Ah!

[crying] That wasn't the deal.

‐ Sorry, that deal expired.

‐ Well, get the cake.

‐ Good trick, Nora.

‐ Thanks.

‐ ♪

‐ Okay, I'll cook these popcorn balls

with my heat breath.

Then, I'll drop them into my lair.

Hopefully, we'll be able to hear the sound of their screams

over all the popping. [laughs]

‐ You're a sick kid.

I like you.

‐ Thanks, Aunt Mandy. I like you, too.

Now let's get popping.

Thunder‐tanium walls up.

Revenge down.

‐ [wind blows]

‐ [popcorn popping]

‐ [woman screams]

‐ [laughing]

We are so much better than everyone in our family.

‐ It's pretty clever, guys.

‐ Thanks, Phoebe.

Phoebe!

If you two are up here,

then who's the girl down there screaming?

‐ Ah!

Ah, oh!

We made it, Ruby.

Where is she? Ruby!

I'm coming, Ruby!

[grunting]

‐ Well, if you two really wanna get back at us,

you'll have to catch us.

‐ I licked that doorknob!

‐ I have telekinesis!

‐ What's this?

Why's my band here?

‐ Max...I'm sorry I missed your gig.

I should have been there.

And I'm hoping this gig makes up for it.

‐ I didn't care that you weren't there.

‐ Just admit it.

‐ I'm touchy feely, okay?

But if you wanna stay and watch, I can't stop you.

‐ All right, Max, let's rock.

‐ Happy Birthday, Barb.

You're one year hotter.

‐ [in German accent] Not cool‐zen. That's a mom‐zen.

‐ Thank you, strange German boy.

‐ Mandy...

I wanted to say sorry.

You're my sister,

and I shouldn't have let you down.

‐ That's all I ever wanted to hear.

[laughs]

There's only one thing that could make this better.

‐ Way ahead of you!

‐ ♪

‐ ALL: [chanting] McBoogers! McBoogers! McBoogers!

McBoogers! McBoogers! McBoogers!

‐ Look, this candle's crocked.

‐ That was close. Now it's perfect.

‐ ♪

‐ [cheering]

‐ Whoo! Yeah!

‐ [crash]

‐ BOTH: No!

‐ BOTH: We have a problem.

‐ Yep.

‐ ♪

‐ ♪

Repair and Synchronization by Easy Subtitles Synchronizer 1.0.0.0