Original subtitles

‐ Chloe, come on down. It's game night.

‐ [whooshing]

I'm tackling you first.

‐ It's not that kind of game night, Chloe.

It's when we all get together and have fun as a family.

‐ Yeah, Mom and Dad go all out.

It's kinda ridiculous. ‐ [loud kissing sounds]

‐ Just like your "kissing" ringtone.

‐ It sounds like your girlfriend Allison is texting you.

‐ ♪ Max and Allison sittin' in a tree ♪

♪ K‐i... ♪

Well, you know what goes on in that tree.

‐ Allison's not my girlfriend.

We're just hangin' out.

And whoever changed my ringtone, very funny.

Seriously, that was kinda funny.

‐ Is she coming over so we can all finally meet her?

‐ No way. She's just coming over to pick up

a book to study for our exam on Monday.

I don't need books because I invented

a device to make me smarter.

‐ Clearly, you haven't used it yet.

‐ [lights click off]

‐ ["Game Show" music]

‐ Live, from our beautiful home in downtown Hiddenville,

it's Thunderman family game night!

‐ ALL: [cheering, applauding]

‐ HANK: [laughing] Hey!

Welcome, everybody. Thank you so much.

I, of course, am your Dad, Hank,

and this is your beautiful Mom, Barb!

‐ Thanks, Hank.

It's good to be back.

‐ Yay, Mommy and Daddy!

‐ Aw, she thinks they're cool.

‐ The game our family will be playing tonight is

"Who Arted?" [laughing]

‐ That's right, the winning team will draw,

charade, and sculpt their way to victory.

‐ Just get to the prize wheel!

‐ ALL: Prize wheel! Prize wheel! Prize wheel!

‐ Did someone say "prize wheel?!"

‐ ALL: Ooooh!

‐ Maybe it'll finally land on "new car."

‐ I just don't want it to land on "underwear shopping spree."

I don't wear them, people!

‐ Hold on, family.

Chloe doesn't have a teammate for her first game night.

‐ HANK: That's right.

‐ And since she just "wuvs" her big sister, Phoebe,

maybe they should be teammates.

‐ Yay, Phoebe! ‐ PHOEBE: [laughs]

‐ Aw, she thinks you're cool.

‐ Max, you and I are usually teammates.

Who are you gonna play with?

‐ I guess I could settle for Colosso, unless he's busy.

‐ ALL: [laughing]

‐ He has no life.

‐ Okay, who wants to spin the wheel?

How about this adorable contestant?

‐ [whooshing]

You've gotta spin it to win it, baby!

‐ [wheel clicking]

‐ It better not land on "new car," Hank.

We spent half our savings on these darn outfits.

‐ It never does.

"New car" is on the wheel

just to keep them excited about the game.

The chances of it landing on it are one in a million.

‐ [wheel clicks] ‐ KIDS: New car!!

‐ Yay! ‐ How could this happen?

‐ BARB: [swats Hank]

‐ Yeah, we did it!

I'd give you a thumbs up, too, if I had thumbs.

[evil laughter]

♪ A car is in my future and it's new ♪

‐ ♪

♪ What you see ♪

♪ Is not what you get ♪

♪ Livin' our lives with a secret ♪

♪ We fit right in ♪

♪ Bet you never guessed ♪

♪ 'Cause we're livin' our lives ♪

♪ Just like all the rest ♪

♪ A picture perfect family ♪

♪ Is what we try to be ♪

♪ Look closer, you might see ♪

♪ The crazy things we do ♪

♪ This isn't make believe ♪

♪ It's our reality ♪

♪ Just your average family ♪

♪ Trying to be normal and stay out of trouble ♪

♪ Livin' a double life ♪

‐ Rigging that wheel was one of our best ideas ever, Colosso.

Freakin' out Mom and Dad is just icing on the cake.

‐ Yeah, look at 'em, they're all like...

COLOSSO: "Hank, you said this couldn't happen!"

COLOSSO: "I just don't know what went wrong!"

‐ Check out Dad's face

when the wheel landed on "new car."

‐ Oh, hey, you still have the selfie we took

when you turned me back into a human.

‐ Of course. We make a great team.

And when we win game night, that car will be ours.

‐ ♪

‐ COLOSSO: Ugh...

‐ ♪

‐ Cruisin' in that car with you and Allison's gonna be epic.

‐ Allison, huh?

That'll be...

fun.

‐ ♪

‐ ALLISON: Ahhh! ‐ COLOSSO: Bye!

Ha!

‐ What are you up to this time, Max?

First you convince me to partner with a four‐year‐old

and then the wheel lands on "new car"?

This whole thing smells fishy.

‐ Oh, uh, that's me. I'm covered in fish oil.

My fur has never been silkier.

‐ I didn't do anything to the wheel.

If you don't believe me,

go down to my lair and check for evidence.

‐ [watch beeps] ‐ [magnet explodes]

‐ You know, it doesn't matter.

Chloe and I are gonna win that car

and go on the best road trip ever.

Next stop, the library. ♪ Oh oh ♪

‐ Best road trip ever.

‐ [palm slap]

‐ My fantasy is right.

I should get Chloe to the library

for a quick study sesh.

‐ Are you fantasizing about studying?

‐ Are you about to get hit with popcorn?

[powers zapping]

‐ COLOSSO: [laughing]

‐ How cool would it be if we had our own new car?

‐ To the amusement park, driver.

‐ And don't forget the bubbles, Coco.

‐ ♪

‐ BOTH: Cool!

‐ We've gotta find a way to win this game.

‐ I have an idea.

You figure out what to do while I eat Dad's couch chips.

‐ Hey, Max has a device

to make himself smarter for his exam.

We can use it to make us smarter for game night.

‐ See? I told you my idea would work.

‐ Well, the wheel looks perfectly clean.

‐ Yeah, I guess Max didn't rig it.

‐ We're not buying anyone a car,

so I guess there's only one thing to do.

‐ BOTH: [quietly] Win game night.

‐ We're gonna be the smartest people in the house, Billy.

After I go, you'll go. Hit it.

‐ [electrical zapping]

‐ So, do you feel smarter?

‐ Totally.

Hey, you stole my bow! [powers zapping]

Ow!

You can't do that! [powers zapping]

Ow!

I'll show you. ‐ You heard her. Cut it out!

‐ [powers zapping] Ow!

[powers zapping] Ow!

‐ No way. ‐ NORA: [powers zapping]

Ow! Ow!

‐ Max, come get some pizza before we start playing.

‐ Okay.

‐ What are you doing?

Don't eat with the enemy. ‐ Right.

Let's do a little warm‐up

before we embarrass those losers.

‐ I don't think we need it, but, okay.

Guess this clue. Yeah. Okay. Uh‐huh.

Got a little bit of this thing goin'.

Curl that back around.

It's a phrase.

‐ Man, we're gonna lose.

‐ [cell phone kissing sounds]

‐ Your stupid girlfriend's here for her book.

‐ She's not my girlfriend. [spritzing cologne]

‐ You're twirling in a cologne cloud?

Who are you?

Ugh.

‐ Hey, you. ‐ Hey.

Thanks. How's game night going?

‐ Oh, good. About to play "Who Arted?"

‐ Oh, I love that game!

At summer camp, we played "Who Arted?" all the time.

I would cut loose and rip out a win every week.

‐ Really?

How would you like to be my partner for game night?

‐ Seriously? ‐ Yeah.

‐ Guess someone's finally ready for me to meet his family.

‐ Well, you gotta meet 'em to beat 'em.

What do you say?

‐ Yeah. Just give me a second to call my mom.

‐ All right. See ya in there, partner.

‐ Hi, Mom, I'm gonna hang out at Max's.

He finally wants me to meet his family.

I told you I was his girlfriend.

[giggling]

‐ COLOSSO: Hey! Hey! Hey!

Hey, what are you doing?

‐ Sorry, Colosso, I've got a partner who can draw

and doesn't smell like fish.

‐ You'll regret this! [echoing]

‐ It's game time!

‐ Hey, what'd you do to Colosso?

‐ Mind your own business. Got a new partner.

‐ New partner?

‐ Ohhhh...this must be‐‐

‐ Ignore her. She's trying to psyche us out.

‐ Are you kidding me?

He can't just switch partners at the last minute.

Can't you see he's up to something?

‐ One less supervillain playing for a car.

We'll allow it.

‐ Bedtime story! ‐ Yes!

‐ How could you allow this?

‐ HANK: Billy and Nora, your turn.

Let's see what you got.

‐ A pen! A boy with a pen!

A boy with a pen who's staring at me!

‐ I haven't even started drawing yet.

‐ Submarine! Gumbo! Church! Home for the holidays!

‐ Someone else go

so I don't have to explain what's happening.

‐ All right, Chloe, we're up.

Thank you.

All right.

Okay.

‐ This is hard to watch, but I can't look away.

‐ [buzzer rings]

‐ It's "heart" and "soul."

‐ HANK: Noooo! ‐ BARB: It's really not.

‐ Don't worry, Chloe. We'll just win the next one.

‐ I'm bored. I'm gonna go see my dollies.

‐ Whoa, wait, Chloe.

‐ Aw, tough break, Phoebe. ‐ Yeah.

‐ Yes! Now all we have to do is beat Max and Allison

and we get a new car. ‐ Hank.

‐ I mean, we don't have to buy a new car.

Sorry, there's a lot goin' on.

‐ Nice try, Max.

I'm gonna find another partner.

You're not gettin' rid of me that easy.

‐ It's not my fault Chloe ditched you.

I'd never do that.

‐ Oh, please, you already ditched Coloss‐‐oh!

‐ ♪

‐ [doorbell ringing] ‐ Oh, I'll get it.

That's my new teammate.

‐ Hello, family!

Uncle Colosso's here for game night.

‐ BARB: [gasping]

‐ COLOSSO & PHOEBE: You're goin' down.

‐ Uncle Colosso, what are you doing up here?

In here. Here. Just here.

‐ I'm here to help my dear niece win this game.

‐ Hello, it's nice to meet another member of Max's family.

Not that I've technically met anyone else.

‐ I thought this was supposed to be "family" game night.

Barbara, still as ravishing as ever.

Mmmmm! ‐ Ew! Ew! Okay, no! No!

Phoebe, I'd like to talk to you in the kitchen, please.

‐ Oh, really? What about?

‐ Phoebe. Kitchen. Now!

‐ You two look smaller than I remember.

‐ Come on, Nora, let's sneak downstairs

and fix your brain while no one's looking.

‐ We're going to fix my brain, so nobody look!

‐ So...this is weird.

‐ What are you talking about?

‐ Him.

‐ [slurping water]

‐ Hey, you want a quick tour of the house?

‐ Oh, I'd love one.

‐ Yeah, well, start with the back.

‐ Oh?

‐ Well, I've seen it already.

What are you doing?

‐ Looking for some shredded newspaper.

That was a lot of water,

and I don't wanna ruin Lady Barbara's couch.

‐ Of all people, you teamed up with Phoebe?

I thought we were best friends.

‐ We were till ya ditched me for Little Miss Bright Eyes.

‐ Ah, her eyes are amazing, aren't they?

‐ Ick.

The point is, Phoebe's my new best friend now.

All right, I still can't stand her,

but I am gonna help her win that car,

so you can't get it!

Traitor! ‐ You're the traitor!

‐ You're the traitor! ‐ You teamed up with Phoebe!

‐ You threw me down the chute!

‐ All right, I think I've finally got

all the Colosso cooties off my hand.

‐ Honestly, Phoebe, what were you thinking?

Using the Animalizer to turn Colosso human?

‐ One word. I want a car.

‐ Two words. I'm changin' him back.

And you're outta the game.

‐ Dad, that's not fair.

You can't just kick me out of family game night.

‐ Um, Hank, come over here.

‐ There is no way I'm lettin' you win!

‐ There's no way I'm lettin' you win!

‐ You traitor. ‐ It takes one to know one!

‐ [argument continues]

‐ Colosso can stay.

‐ Dad, thank you! Thank you.

‐ And when those two teams take each other down,

we win the game!

‐ And then it's, hello, new car. ‐ BARB: [swats Hank]

‐ I knew it was wrong the second I said it.

‐ Oh, here's the problem.

This thing was set to "stupid."

Why would Max even make that a setting?

‐ [powers zapping]

I like it when my eyes fart fire.

‐ Okay, I see why he did it.

Right, all we have to do is set this thing to "smart."

[pushing buttons]

‐ [electrical zapping]

‐ Now you're definitely smart enough to win us that car.

‐ Je suis super intelligent, Billy.

Je parle le franais.

Pourquoi je parle le franais?

‐ You're speaking French. Why are you speaking French?

‐ HANK: Kids, get up here or you're out of the game!

‐ BARB: Hurry up. The next category is French culture.

‐ HANK: [laughing]

‐ French culture.

You're good at that now, right?

‐ Oui, oui. ‐ You can wee‐wee later.

Focus on the question.

Are you good at French culture?

‐ La tour Eiffel.

‐ Wrong! Eiffel Tower.

‐ Hank, she said it in French.

She's showboating.

‐ Ten points for Billy and Nora.

All right, Phoebe,

you and your very annoying uncle are up next.

‐ MAX: This is awful.

We should have this game in the bag by now.

‐ Okay, I think maybe I should go.

I wanted to meet your family,

but this is getting really intense.

‐ Nah, who's intense? I'm not intense.

I just wanna win! [powers zapping]

‐ Why'd you do that? ‐ Forgive me.

It's like I'm not in control of my own limbs.

‐ [buzzer rings] ‐ Oh, our turn.

Now, go sculpt me a masterpiece so we can win this thing.

‐ I have had it with you.

I can't use my powers right now, but I can do this.

[swats Max's head] ‐ Ow!

[swats Phoebe] ‐ Ow!

‐ You can't do that to my partner!

[swats Max] ‐ Don't hit me, you traitor!

‐ COLOSSO: Eat the pillow, you backstabber!

Ahhhhh! [swats Billy & Nora]

‐ HANK: Hey! Don't hit the little ones.

‐ Fine, I'll hit the big one. [swats Hank]

‐ BARB: Those are my good pillows, you stupid rabbit‐‐

‐‐breeder! He's a rabbit breeder!

‐ ALL: [swatting, grunting]

‐ CHLOE: Stop it!

Be nice!

‐ What is going on?

‐ COLOSSO: Max started it.

‐ Yeah, he's a liar and a cheater.

You don't deserve to win that car, Max.

You brought in your girlfriend, the game night wizard.

‐ I told you she's not my girlfriend.

‐ I'm not?

I feel like such an idiot.

‐ Max, I think I speak for everyone here when I say...

you don't need her! Good riddance!

‐ [Animalizer zapping]

‐ [sighing] I've been waiting to do that all night.

‐ Heh... well, goodnight.

If you need me, I'll be down in the lair hating you all.

Hmph!

‐ I don't know what just happened.

‐ Let a girl explain it to you.

She's your girlfriend! ‐ She is?

‐ Think about it, Max.

Every time you see her,

you're all worried about how you smell.

‐ And you talk about her all the time.

‐ You see her every day.

‐ And you get that look in your eye when you think about her.

[laughs] That's it.

The same look your father gets

when he finds potato chips in the furniture.

‐ Max, you went to all that trouble to win the car.

What were you gonna do with it?

‐ Ride around with Allison.

Oh, man, she is my girlfriend.

‐ BARB: [laughs]

‐ Allison?

Are you stealing my sister's roller skates?

‐ No, my bike's got a flat.

I think something chewed a hole in my tire.

‐ Take that, Bright Eyes. [evil laughter]

‐ Look, Allison, I'm...

I'm so sorry.

‐ For using me for a stupid car?

‐ For everything.

And the only reason I wanted that stupid car

was so I could go places with you.

‐ Really? ‐ Yeah.

Look, the truth is...

I've never even had a real girlfriend before.

But if I was going to have one,

I'd want her to be you.

‐ ALL: Awwww...

‐ So... will you?

‐ Yes! [laughing]

And next time, tell me I'm your game night wizard.

I'll bring my A‐game, fool. ‐ MAX: [laughs]

We're coming back in now! ‐ BARB: Go! Go! Go! Go!

‐ Mom, Dad, everyone, meet my girlfriend, Allison.

‐ Hi. Again.

‐ Well, it's a pleasure to meet you, Allison.

‐ [phone bings] ‐ Oh.

It's my mom. I've gotta get home.

It was so nice to finally meet you.

But you understand if I meet Max on the porch from now on.

‐ Yeah. ‐ We get it.

‐ So, I'll see you tomorrow?

‐ Um...

‐ Right.

[kisses cheek]

‐ Save it for the tree!

‐ HANK: Bye, Allison. ‐ PHOEBE: See ya.

Well, I guess that means game night's over.

Wait. Who won the car?

‐ Well, since you and Max cheated, you two are out.

And that puts your Dad and I in second place!

‐ No, Nora and I came in second

after our comeback in the last round.

‐ I guess that means you have to buy them a car.

You know you're my favorite sister, right?

‐ Merci, Phoebe.

[speaking French]

[gasps]

‐ Say what now?

‐ Wait, did you two mess with the machine down in my lair?

‐ Je ne comprends pas.

‐ Sweet! I am totally gonna pass my French exam.

But all you guys need to know is that they cheated.

‐ That means we don't have to buy a car!

Thank goodness each one of you kids

is a terrible, stinkin' cheater!

‐ HANK: [laughing]

Your mother and I have never been more proud of you guys.

‐ [doorbell rings]

‐ BILLY: [zooming]

Sorry, Coco, we're not getting the car.

‐ COCO: [screeching] [chest thudding]

‐ ♪

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