Original subtitles

- This heatwave is the worst.

- So hot.

It's like we moved into dad's bellybutton.

- No, no, I got this.

It's not like you guys can move things with your minds.

- Let me help, Nora.

The hose goes over there.

- All right, Billy, go turn on the water so we can

turn this room into our own private waterpark.

- On it.

- Hold on.

Nobody move.

Assessing, assessing.

Mm-hmm. Something's different.

- Kids, why is the slide inside?

- The slide!

We make a great team.

- You know we wouldn't need this slide

if we just had a pool.

- I want a pool.

Come on, dad!

- Okay, you can have a pool.

- Seriously? Awesome.

- Hank.

- I'm the good cop, Barb.

Now you swoop in and shut this down.

- Oh, okay, tell you what.

If you kids can help raise the money,

we'll chip in too and see what we can afford.

- Oh.

- Awesome. - Great.

- Your bad cop needs work.

- I can't wait for a pool.

Step aside.

I'm doing this.

- Max.

I-I-I don't think you should be--

- Whoo-hoo!

[unintelligible]

Oh!

- ALL: My turn!

- ♪ What you see is not what you get ♪

♪ Living our lives with a secret ♪

♪ We fit right in, bet you'd never guess ♪

♪ Because we're living our lives just like all the rest ♪

♪ A picture-perfect family is what we try to be ♪

♪ But closer you might see the crazy things we do ♪

♪ This isn't make-believe ♪

♪ It's our reality ♪

♪ Just your average family trying to be normal ♪

♪ And stay out of trouble ♪

♪ Living a double life ♪

♪ Yard sale dubby, dubby, dubby, dubby ♪

♪ Yard sale dubby, dubby, dubby, dubby ♪

- Billy, if I knew you were gonna make up an annoying song,

I never would suggested a--

- ♪ Yard sale, dubby, dubby, dubby, dubby ♪

♪ Yard sale, dubby, dubby, dubby, dubby ♪

- Guys, this is gonna be great.

We'll make a fortunate selling our old junk, buy a pool

and then invite cute boys over for pool parties.

- What is it with you and cute boys?

- What?

It's not like I have an app on my phone that tells me

when there's one on our block.

- [phone dings]

- VOICE ON PHONE: He's cute.

- I've had enough of this place.

Unbearable heat, unnecessary singing, Billy.

Jetpack, take me away!

- [engine fizzles]

- Uh, I blame Billy.

- Oh cool.

Comic books and action figures.

Oh, this isn't cool.

It's just mom.

No one's gonna buy this Electress stuff.

Mom never saved the world like Dad did.

- Yeah, but she did other stuff like...

What did she do?

- I don't know.

But Dad was out there stopping runaway trains,

taking down villains and inventing the cookie pie.

Is it a cookie? Is it a pie?

Only Dad knows.

- It's both.

- And that's why he's a national treasure.

- I am so proud of you kids, chipping in,

working together as a family, learning songs.

♪ Yard sale, shama-lama ding dong ♪

What you got there, Billy?

- I'm selling all my army men.

Well, almost all.

Not Sergeant Flargeant, he's my favorite.

- Sergeant Flargeant?

Who's this?

Corporal Smorporal?

- It is now.

- Nora, you must really want a pool.

You're selling all your bows?

- Yep.

Yesterday, it was so hot, my bow melted and stuck to my head.

It's a part of me now.

- Oh, Phoebe, that's all my old Electress stuff.

You can't sell that.

- [chuckles] No kidding.

- What does that mean?

- What do you mean?

- I mean you can't sell that

because my actual Electress whip is in this box.

This is a very dangerous weapon.

If someone besides me uses this,

they would really hurt themselves.

- [chuckles] What'll happen?

Their lights will turn off?

Got it, putting the box back.

- Thank you.

- Uh, honey, you kind of left out the part

where if your whip gets in the wrong hands,

it'll explode and take out half a city block.

- And risk that info getting back to our supervillain son

voted most likely to take out half a city block?

- So smart.

Uh, you know, you really were something back in the day.

- Back in the day?

- I don't know why I say things.

- [phone dings]

- VOICE ON PHONE: He's cute.

- Ooh, and he's right outside.

Oh, he is cute.

- What is it gonna take

to put you in these old, dirty pants today?

- Here's your bow.

You got a good one.

I wore it to my first circus.

It still smells like elephant and childish wonder.

Give it back, you monster!

I don't need your dirty bow money!

- So...how are things going over here?

- A lot of looky-loos, but nobody's serious.

I think I'll call it a day.

- Nora, I know these bows mean a lot to you, but if you want

that pool, you're gonna have to make some sacrifices.

- Can we sell Dr. Colosso?

He's never liked you, and now Billy's on his list.

- Why don't you go upstairs, pick out the ones

you don't wear anymore and just sell those?

- Okay.

What are you looking at?

- I see you eyeing those old, dried up paintbrushes.

You a collector?

- Save it.

I'm here for comics.

You got any, tank top?

- I'm not wearing a tank top.

- But you look like you got a bunch.

- What I got a bunch of is comics,

but I'm not gonna sell 'em to some kid who calls me names.

- I got 50 bucks.

- Tank top will be right back.

Well, you know what they say.

One man's trash is another weird kid's 50 bucks worth of trash.

- [sighs]

I need an app that finds cute boys

that don't ask me to pull their finger.

Oh, uh, mom, you didn't have to move the box.

I was totally gonna do it.

- I didn't move it.

Oh, no, what if somebody took it outside to sell it?

- That box isn't going anywhere 'til trash day.

- What? - Coming!

- If you like that box of garbage,

you'll love these dirty pants.

- Hey, Max, have you seen that box of mom's old stuff?

- Seen it and sold it.

- What?

[whispers] Max, that box had mom's old Electress whip in it.

- Oh, poor sucker, now he's gotta throw it out.

- No, Max, it's her real whip.

It's super dangerous in a non-sups' hands.

You've gotta get it back.

Whoever bought it could get seriously hurt.

- Luckily, I don't get too attached to my customers.

- Hurt kid plus angry mom equals no pool.

- No pool equals sad Max.

Hey, kid, get back here!

Wait, am I hurting the kid?

- Just get the box back.

- So did Max see the box?

- Sure did.

- Oh, good.

Did he put it back in the attic?

- [chuckles] Would I be standing here avoiding eye contact

if Max didn't put the box in the attic?

- Oh, oh, oh, time to beat the heat.

Oh, oh, freezy socks!

- [snaps]

- Hey.

Whatcha wearin'?

- You told me to sell all the bows I don't wear.

But look, I still wear them all.

- [crash]

- How did my kids get so weird?

[laughing]

Frozen thundies!

Uh, uh, uh.

Ah!

- There's the nerd mobile.

This must be the place.

- [doorbell music plays]

- Yep, this is the place.

- What do you want, hipster?

- Look, I sold that box to you by mistake,

and I was wondering if I could get it back.

Here's your 20 bucks.

- I gave you 50, sideburns.

- Right.

Wait, there's something missing in here.

- You mean Electress' real whip?

I don't know how you got it, but you're never getting it back,

Wall Street.

- Stop calling me names and give it back.

- I'm not giving this bad boy up.

I'd only give this to Electress herself.

We all know that's not gonna happen, Chinatown.

- [locks snapping]

- Like four locks are gonna stop me.

[laughs]

- [alarm beeping]

- That might.

- ♪

- No whip?

Why'd you come home without the whip?

How did he even know the whip was real?

- I don't know.

He's some sort of super fan.

Okay, he said he'd never give it back to anyone

but Electress herself.

- Oh, well then we'll just ask mom to help us.

- You think that's a good idea? - No.

Oh, but we could tell dad.

- Really? - No!

- BARB: Max, is that you down there?

- [in high-pitched voice] Yes, I'm down here.

- Why did you use a fake voice if you're just

gonna say you're down here?

- BARB: Is that you too, Phoebe?

- [in deep voice] Yes, it's me.

Look, if we wanna get that pool, we gotta get that whip back

before mom figures out it's gone.

Here she comes.

Lose the box.

- [crash]

- DR. COLOSSO: Ow! I know that was you, Billy!

- Hey, mom, what's the haps?

- Max, where did you put my stuff?

- Uh, in the attic right next to the thing, under the thing

with the thingy.

- I-I just need to find my whip.

It could blow up...

your minds it's so cool and not dangerous.

Luckily my old Electro-puter here has a homing signal

that can locate it in a jiffy.

- [whispers] Quick, go to your old people translator app

and figure out what "jiffy" means.

- Oh, no, it means fast, Phoebe, really fast.

- [computer beeping]

- Two hundred and fifty-three updates.

- [blows air]

- Has it been that long?

- [computer beeping]

- Oh, this thing's gonna take forever.

- Max, we need a plan.

- Way ahead of you.

If he wants Electress, we'll give him Electress.

Electress.

- Why are you calling me Elect--oh.

- ♪

- So, dad, do you think we've made enough to get a pool?

- No quite, Billy.

Pools cost a little more than $8.17 and a button.

- Well, Sergeant Flargeant, looks like this is goodbye.

It'll be easier if we don't look at each other.

- Billy, what are you doing?

You can't sell Sergeant Flargeant.

- I have to.

I really want to get that pool for you.

You've been crying ever since you got out here.

- I'm not crying.

This is sweat.

- Yeah, sweat from your eyeballs.

- I'm serious.

It's like a million degrees under these things.

- A million degrees of sadness.

- Nora, honey, why are you crying?

- It's sweat!

- ♪

- [knocking on door]

- BOY: Use the doorbell!

- [doorbell music plays]

- Well, look who's wearing a tank top.

- It's hot, okay?

Anyway, I thought you'd might like to meet someone.

Oh, Electress!

- [electricity zapping]

- Hello, citizen.

- Electress!

Is it really you?

- Yes, it is me.

I hope you turn off the light when you leave a room.

- I do! I don't.

I will!

- I believe you have something of mine.

- Yes, yes, your whip.

Come in, my high-wattage queen.

- Whoa, I see you're a fan of Electress...who is me.

- Of course, you're my hero.

I'll be right back.

I hid your whip in case your mortal enemy Blackout

came looking for it.

- Bright idea, boy.

We wouldn't want it falling into his hands.

- You--you mean her hands.

- I mean, her hands.

Ha, spark attack.

- [electricity zapping]

- Wow, Max, I can't believe these gloves you made

actually work.

- Me neither.

I made them completely of parts from your laptop.

I just hope he comes back soon.

Seeing mom's face everywhere is freaking me out.

- It's not just her face.

This place is a shrine.

- This lonely loser pasted mom's face on the cover

of this superhero magazine.

- No, Max, I think that's real.

I think this is all real.

"Electress short circuits robot army."

"Electress saves White House then lights Christmas tree."

- How could mom have done all of this?

She can't even work the thermostat.

- I got your whip.

But before you go, Electress...

what was your favorite battle ever?

- [laughs] That would be like choosing my favorite child,

impossible.

Although at first, I'd have to say my oldest daughter.

- Well, this was fun.

But Electress has to get to a charity event.

Needy children without batteries.

- So I'll just take my whip.

- Sorry, one more question.

What ever happened to your sidekick?

- I had a sidekick?

Oh, ha, ha, my sidekick.

I was just telling this guy that story.

Here, tell him the story.

- Don't look at me.

Until we got to this dweeb cave,

I thought she was dad's sidekick.

- Oh.

A return of the spark attack.

- [electricity buzzing] - Ow!

- Oh, sorry. - [electricity buzzing]

- Turn it off! - I can't!

- You're not the real Electress!

Liars!

Whiggy, whiggy whip!

- Hey, what are you doing?

- I'm sorry.

Whiggy, whiggy whip?

Is that something Electress used to say?

- Nope.

That was all Cedrick.

- [computer beeping]

- Now we're cooking with gas.

Seventy percent done.

- [computer beeping]

- Sixty-eight?

How are you going backwards?

Fifty-one?

You're worse than the thermostat.

Ugh!

- No one's buying anything anymore, dad.

They're just playing with stuff.

Dad?

- Ah!

You're right, Billy.

At this rate, you guys probably won't make enough for a pool.

- That's because everybody bailed.

Where are Max and Phoebe?

[in deep voice] "We should do a yard sale, guys."

[in high-pitched voice] "We can tods make a lot of money, guys."

- Whoa, Billy, take it easy, buddy.

- I sold Sergeant Flargeant.

My favorite toy now belongs to that pasty kid down the street

who smells like cauliflower.

- Well, it's still light out.

You wanna stay and see if we can sell anything?

- Nah.

Let's just pack it up.

- ♪

- Step right up.

Nora's prized bows are now for sale.

This one was worn by the queen.

This one can charge your cellphone.

This one has a pocket.

- Nora, why are selling all of your bows?

- I realized I was being silly.

It's not fair if everyone else is giving up stuff and I'm not.

Just like you gave up Sergeant Flargeant.

- I am really proud...of you both.

- Thanks.

Now if you'll excuse me, I have some bows to sell.

This bow belonged to Rihanna.

This one can cure loneliness.

This one has a blog.

- [blows air]

- My freeze breath isn't working either.

I think the whip is cancelling our powers.

- Uh, man, mom had some pretty cool stuff.

- Uh-oh, Max, it's getting hot.

- It's becoming unstable.

I just hope it doesn't spark.

It's a sure sign a weapon's about to explode.

- [sparks]

- And it's sparking.

- Hello, jerks.

I just called my dad.

And when he gets home, you guys are gonna be in big trouble.

- Cedrick, you have to let us go.

We think this whip is about to explode.

- Why should I believe you?

You guys have been lying to my face ever since I met you.

- You know what? You're right.

Let's start over.

I'm...Monica.

And this is Ross.

- And for all you know, we could be Electress' children.

- Please.

There's no way kids with a mom as cool as Electress

would know absolutely nothing about her.

- He's right.

We're horrible kids.

- It's true, you are.

- Look, mom is an amazing superhero,

and some random kid knows more about her than we do.

- [electricity zapping]

- Shocked...to see me.

- Electress!

- Amazing!

How'd you find me, my super-charged goddess?

- No need to make this weird, citizen.

I used my state-of-the-art homing device

to track my whip here.

Thank you, young man, for being a heroic Electrolyte.

- Electress, these posers aren't really your kids,

are they?

- My kids?

No way.

My kids would never be so reckless as to compromise

their identities and safety just to make a couple of bucks.

- Told you.

- But I will make sure they get what's coming to them.

- A stern talking to while we swim in our new pool?

- Farewell, young sparkplug.

- [electricity zapping]

- Electress, wait!

Before you go, who's gonna pay for this hole in my carpet?

- ♪

- Well, you did it.

You got the pool you earned.

- We did all that hard work for this.

- Oh, no, she didn't!

- Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa!

Hey.

We are still proud of you kids.

- Well, two of you.

- Why are you proud of me?

I only sold one stinking bow.

- And it was a pleasure doing business with you.

Good luck cashing that check, girly.

Away!

- [engine fizzles]

- Uh.

And Billy wins again.

- Mom, did you really use the Eiffel Tower

to stop an alien invasion?

- [in French accent] But of course.

- One time, I used it as a harpoon--

- Quiet, dad.

- Yeah, mom's talking.

Mom, we are so sorry we didn't know

all those amazing things about you.

You really used to be somebody.

- Thank you, I think.

- Yeah.

I don't know why you don't talk about it.

Dad brags about his stuff all the time.

- Oh, you wanna hear the harpoon story?

- Quiet, dad.

- You know, as great as those days were, my biggest

accomplishments are sitting right here beside me.

- Aw, thanks, mom.

- And now that you're grounded, you'll be beside me

for the next six months.

- Come on, mom, tell us one superhero story.

- [indistinct chatter]

- It was so long ago.

There I was, up against the deadliest sea monster,

Squidonkulis.

- Oh, I fought Squidonkulis once.

- ALL: Dad!

- ♪

- ♪

Repair and Synchronization by Easy Subtitles Synchronizer 1.0.0.0