Original subtitles

- Fry interception!

- Jerk kick! - Oww! Oh...

Hey, Jay Jay, why isn't the ketchup workin'?

- Ketchup's offline.

Table 8 had a splat-tastrophe.

- Max what are you doing?

You can't use your powers to get that ketchup.

People will see you.

I'll get it.

- You are such a scaredy cat.

And a chicken.

You're a chicken-cat.

- Hey, I am not scared, okay?

I eat food out of mystery tubes.

- Then use your powers, chicken-cat.

[clucking]

[meowing]

- Ha, who's the chicken-cat now?

- Why don't you ask the guy who just saw you use your powers?

- What do I do? - Fix it.

- I know--I'll just live under this table forever.

Send money and clothes.

- No, go over there and make him un-see it.

- Okay, fine, he saw my superpowers,

now he's gonna see my girly powers.

- Hm...

- [blowing air]

[blowing more air]

- Hi. So, did you, uh, see my little magic trick there?

I've got a million of 'em.

Oh!

- That's cool. Hey, can you do this?

- No, I cannot.

- My name's Link and I have superpowers like you.

- [chair scraping]

- Way to fix things, Phoebe.

- ♪

♪ What you see ♪

♪ Is not what you get ♪

♪ Livin' our lives with a secret ♪

♪ We fit right in ♪

♪ Bet you never guessed ♪

♪ 'Cause we're livin' our lives ♪

♪ Just like all the rest ♪

♪ A picture perfect family ♪

♪ Is what we try to be ♪

♪ Look closer, you might see ♪

♪ The crazy things we do ♪

♪ This isn't make believe ♪

♪ It's our reality ♪

♪ Just your average family ♪

♪ Trying to be normal and stay out of trouble ♪

♪ Livin' a double life ♪

- Once I hack into the database,

we'll know exactly who this Link guy is.

- I can't believe there's somebody else

with powers in Hiddenville--

and with such a super cute smile.

- [gasping] You're not gonna believe who his father is.

Dad's greatest enemy.

- PHOEBE: Evilman? - MAX: Evilman!

- Ach, I thought his greatest enemy was skinny jeans.

- Evilman is Link's dad. This is awful.

Dad hates Evilman.

- That's 'cause he's the one supervillain

your father could never beat.

Every fight ended in tie and a city being destroyed.

Those were the days.

- Dad's just jealous of Evilman's awesome laugh.

- EVILMAN: [high-pitched laughter]

- HANK: [screaming]

Where is he?

I hear Evilman's stupid laugh.

- Uh, Evilman? No, no, no.

Uh, that was just me trying to find

my signature supervillain laugh.

So what do you think of this?

Ha. Ha. Ha.

- I like that. But not the other one.

That laugh, and anything to do with Evilman,

is forbidden in this house.

- I've never seen him move that fast.

- Or get that mad.

So, when are you goin' out with Link?

- Are you crazy? I'm cancelling right now.

- No, Phoebe, you've gotta go out with him.

Then me and his dad can become evil besties

and I'll inherit his ice base, huh?

Thirty acres of frozen evil.

It's the ultimate supervillain lair.

- What's wrong with our lair?

- It smells like a pet store.

- Oh, Phoebe, you just got burned.

- All right, it's done.

No super cutie for me.

- I'm not losing my ice base.

"Hey, Link, J.K.

We're totes on for tomorrow."

Smiley. Wink. Heart.

Pft! Girls sound so dumb.

Now what am I gonna wear to meet Evilman?

- Two hundred and eighty thousand jumps.

Think you can beat that?

- [powers zapping]

I guess we'll never know.

- [doorbell ringing]

- WOMAN ANNOUNCING: Alert! Alert! Package delivered.

- [zooming]

- Whoa, a toy delivery?

- I can't wait to see what it is.

I hope it is a jump rope.

- Cool. A remote-controlled helicopter.

- Nora, the box says it's for somebody named "Pete Fisher."

We can't open this. We have to tell mom.

- Why do that when we can just play with it first,

then put it back in the box and nobody would ever know.

- Isn't that stealing?

- Not if I call you "Pete Fisher" for the rest of the day.

- I don't know. It doesn't sound right.

- Would you prefer "Peter"?

- I would!

- WOMAN ANNOUNCING: Alert! Alert!

Son of Evilman approaching.

- Shhh, be cool, Thunder monitor.

This dude has the key to my ice base.

Phoebe, Overachievers of America are at the door for you.

- Overachievers of America? They're a week early.

Of course, they are.

Hey, Link. Link? Link!

- [door slams]

- What's he doing here? How do I look?

Why did you do this?

- Ice base. Who cares? Ice base.

- Max, you can't let Evilman's son--

Hey!

Sorry about that. Doors are weird.

- No worries. I brought you a gift.

The ketchup that brought us together.

- Aw...

- Phoebe, are you trying to say, "Please come in."

- Uh-huh.

[laughing] Come in.

- MAX: Yes!

I just really love ketchup.

- So, listen, before we go out,

there's something you should know.

The reason I have superpowers is because my dad is...

Evilman.

- PHOEBE & MAX: Wha-a-a-a-a-t?

- It's haunted me my whole life.

But, trust me, I'm nothing like my dad.

- Look, I believe you, but my parents would never let me

go out with you if they knew your dad is Evilman.

So we should just go. - Okay.

I'll leave this here.

Your dad's Thunderman?!

- Keep your voice down.

- Oh, this is terrible. My dad hates your dad.

Like hate-hates.

Like even more than being woken up from naps.

- Our parents never have to find out.

This is about you and me.

- And maybe an ice base.

- Oh. Hey, guys. Who's this?

- Hey, Mom, this is Link.

- Hi, Link. - Hi, I'm...I'm...I'm Link.

- Yes, I heard.

- Uh, we were just goin' out.

- Oh, that must be your car in the driveway.

Hank, Phoebe's going out with a boy who has a car!

- [footsteps pounding]

- You were wrong before.

That's the fastest he's ever moved.

- So, who do we have here? - Link.

- Link. - Link.

- Does Link have a last name?

- Uh, Link Link.

- Link Link--so you're named after a panda

and you wanna drive my daughter around?

- Uh, yes, sir.

Uh, it's very nice to meet you, sir, Mr. Thunder, sir.

- Hm, you're already afraid of me.

We're off to a good start.

So, let's check out this "car."

- Ahem!

- After I put on some "pants."

Nice car, Link Link. Got a rearview mirror?

'Cause you never know when someone's following you.

Watching your every move. - Ah!

Yeah, yeah, I got a rearview mirror

and a side view mirror and even a little mirror

inside the side view mirror.

Is that enough mirrors? Please like me.

- Okay, Dad, I think Link has passed your little test.

- You have nothing to worry about, sir.

My dad even installed an emergency G.P.S. button

that alerts him to my exact location of the car

if it breaks down. [laughing]

- Hm, your dad sounds like a smart man.

I like him already.

- LINK: [laughing]

- PHOEBE: [laughing weakly]

- [button beeps] - See you soon, Evilman.

- What was that, Max?

- Uh, I said, let's see if Link can pass the vision test...man.

- Good point. I'd hate to see you get blindsided!

- You're doing great!

- On behalf of Captain Nora and Co-pilot Peter Fisher,

thank you for choosing ThunderAir.

- [helicopter blades whirring]

- We're flying!

Ah, we're crashing!

- Nobody panic!

- BARB: Max? - It's Mom!

- Everybody panic!

- Hide the evidence!

- BILLY: [zooming]

- Aw, you look so cute.

Have you two seen a package?

Mr. Fisher from down the street

said it was delivered here by mistake.

- We haven't seen a thing, have we, Billy?

- What helicopter?

- Well, Max swears he didn't take it,

but I had to double-check, you know.

Can't trust Max, but I can trust you guys.

- [celebratory music]

- Congratulations. Your first crime.

- [noisemaker whizzing]

- COLOSSO: [laughing]

- Crime? We didn't commit a crime.

- Tell that to the cops when they come

to take you away for stealing.

They're gonna throw the book at ya!

- They are?

I don't even like it when books are handed to me.

- All we have to do is fix the helicopter,

put it back in the box and say we found it.

We'll be heroes.

- Congratulations, your first cover-up!

- [noisemaker whizzing]

- COLOSSO: [laughing]

- [scanner blipping]

- Okay, Link, you have my permission

to go out with Phoebe.

Clearly, you were raised right.

- Okay, Max, as soon as Evilman gets here,

just tell him you're a big fan

and he's the father you never had.

- [doorbell ringing] - He's at our door?

I'll get it! I'll get it! I'll get it!

Hi, I wanna fan your father!

Oh, immature!

- Dad, what are you doing here?

- Your car's emergency alert went off.

I came here as fast as I could.

- I wonder who pushed it?

- Come on in, Mr. Link.

- It's Evilman (Evilleman)

It's Mike Evilman, thank you.

- Wait a minute. You look familiar.

You're the mattress guy from those commercials!

I'll put you down!

- BOTH: ♪ On the most comfy mattress in town ♪

- Hank Thunderman. Please, have a seat.

- Well, it's been a pleasure talking to Link.

He seems like a very good boy.

- Oh, yes, some might say too good.

- I have the opposite problem with my son.

You wanna trade? - BOTH: [laughing]

- [high-pitched laugh]

- I know that laugh.

- No. No, you don't.

This is a person you're meeting for the first time.

- You're Evilman!

[roaring]

- You're Thunderman!

[grunting]

- MAX, PHOEBE, LINK: Uh-oh!

- BOTH: [snarling] - No, no, no, no, no!

You two are not destroying another one of my homes!

Or cities.

- Save your sparks, Electriss.

Link and I were just leaving.

- You're not leaving. I am kicking you out!

Evilman's son, Phoebe? Really?

Oh, you are never to see that boy again!

- But he's super cutie! - My ice base!

- Guess I should have waited till I had my ice base

before I ordered this ice furniture.

- Hey, Max, I know, uh, you're pretty bummed,

so I brought you a sandwich.

- Aw, thanks, sis.

- You idiot! Evilman was in our house!

- I know and the only thing I could say was

"I wanna fan your father."

Stupid! Stupid! Stupid!

- Not that--now dad is freaking out

because his worst enemy knows where we live.

He's calling the Hero League now to find out what we should do.

- Oh, I know what we shouldn't do.

Waste perfectly good sandwiches!

I'm still gonna eat that when you leave.

- You're also gonna cover for me

so I can go sneak out and see Link one last time.

- After what happened,

how do you know he wants to see you again?

- [sighing]

Aw...

[laughing]

- Okay, I'll do it for love.

- Really? - Yeah.

The love of that ice base. - I'll take it.

- So you're really gonna help her?

- No.

I'm gonna rat out those lovebirds.

Then dad will need Evilman to track down Link's car

and I can finally meet him.

- Didn't you already meet Evilman?

- That didn't count!

- Just melt this spinny thing to the pointy thing

and we can stay out of the jaily thing.

- [powers zapping]

Done. Let's make sure it works.

- [helicopter blades whirring]

- I don't wanna be Pete Fisher any more.

- Our intel indicates that Evilman

has been retired for over ten years

and poses no threat.

Has he done anything wrong?

- His son asked my daughter out.

- Okay, this is the Hero League emergency number, Thunderman,

not the Desperate Dad Helpline.

- Well, what's that number?

- Oh, I have it right...here.

- Wait!

- Dad, Phoebe snuck out to meet Link.

- What?

- But we've gotta find Evilman so we can track down Link's car.

- Oh, he's probably at his mattress store.

Thunderman, away!

- [plaster thuds]

- All right. I'm gettin' a second chance.

You're Max Thunderman.

He's lucky to be meeting you!

- I hate being woken up from naps!

- Hi, I'm Carl Callaghan.

Where'd that even come from?

- Your evil spawn ran off with my daughter.

- Impossible!

I told him to stay away from that goody-two-shoes.

I'm putting an end to this right now.

- Ho, not if I put an end to it first!

- Um, I've got the phone

that can track down Link's car and their location.

- I allow you to proceed.

- [silently] Oh, thank you.

They're at some terribly-named place called Splatburger.

- Thunderman, away!

- Evilman, rise!

- Max, catching the bus!

- Remember, we got rid of the evidence.

So we're in the clear. Just be cool.

- Don't worry. I am totally cool under pressure.

- Freeze right there. - Ahhhhh, they found us!

- I thought I heard my little angels.

Oh, hello, officer. What's going on?

- It's all my fault!

We lied and stole Pete Fisher's toy then broke it.

- Then we fixed it. - Then we blew it up.

- Then we buried it out back.

- Please don't let him take us to kid jail.

- Billy and Nora, I can't believe you lied to me.

Officer, I am so sorry. - I'm sorry, too, ma'am.

- That you're not eating a hot dog!

- I know, I can expl--huh?

- I'm from the new restaurant Cop Dog

and I'm here to protect and serve you...

this coupon!

Have a hot doggity day.

- So, wonder who made this mess?

- I'm gonna win this one. - Yes.

No. - No, you're not.

Thank you. - Thanks.

Aw, they forgot the ice.

- Oh, I got this. [blowing frigid air]

- Thanks.

- PHOEBE: [laughing] - Just a little superpower fun.

- I never get to do stuff like this.

I always have to pretend to be normal when I'm out.

- I know. Normal's so boring.

My dad's a mattress salesman now.

He basically sleeps while he works.

- Oh, my dad's retired, so he basically

sleeps on the couch until it's time to go to bed.

- BOTH: [laughing]

- Are you worried about us getting caught together?

- Nah, if there's one thing my brother's good at--

it's lying to our parents.

- [heavy thud]

- And apparently to me.

- There they are! - I saw them first!

- So much in common.

- Oh! - Eeeh!

- Phoebe, you are in big trouble.

- And I explicitly forbid you

from seeing this good girl again.

- Why? Because of your issues?

We're not you. Why can't we hang out?

- Your daughter is manipulating my son.

- Oooh, hoo, hoo, hoo, hoo.

You're so lucky there's all these people around.

- Since when did I ever care about people?

Wear the tube, boob!

- Dad! No! - Don't!

- Don't do this, please! - Dad! Seriously?

- Food fight!

- Eat chicken, turkey face!

- [chicken thuds] - [high-pitched laughter]

- Hope you like cupcakes, cupcake!

- [cupcake thuds]

- [cackling laughter]

- Looks like it's nacho day!

- [nachos splat]

- [high-pitched laughter]

- I'm gonna knock your guac off.

- [guacamole splats]

- Enough! Stop behaving like children!

- BOTH: He started it!

- Do you guys realize how much you have in common?

You both hung up your capes.

You moved your families to the suburbs.

And you both sleep all day.

You're basically the same person.

- I have better hair.

- Well, I'm a beloved local TV celebrity.

- LINK & PHOEBE: Dad.

- Fine, but only because I hate wasting food.

- [sighing]

The fact that you're willing to put down your tube

makes me realize that...

you're defenseless!

Hasta la vista, baby! - PHOEBE: No!

- Ha, the weird kid got it!

- You finally noticed me?

- Look, Dad, I'm sorry I lied, but...

Link and I really like each other and you were

trying to keep us apart because of your past.

- You guys are right.

We should be apologizing to you.

You're not...us.

- Yeah, we're not even us any more.

Look at this.

We couldn't even destroy this tacky restaurant.

- Well, since you're old and sleepy,

how about you give me your ice base?

- Oh, I sold that to open up my mattress store.

- Mattresses aren't evil.

- Try lyin' on mine.

It's like a boulder with a sheet on it.

- Oh, you need a new mattress? You should come on by.

- Oooh.

- I will put you down on...

- BOTH: ♪ The most comfy mattress in town ♪

- [high-pitched laughter]

- Did we just end a lifelong feud?

- And it only cost you $372!

- Don't worry, ha, I got this.

My dad's wallet.

I'm a little evil.

- [laughing] We'll split it.

My brother's wallet.

- Ahhhh...

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