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1
00:00:12,666 --> 00:00:16,067
- Phoebe, what do you think
of my painting of Max?
2
00:00:17,641 --> 00:00:20,476
- Clearly you've never
seen Max in a toga.
3
00:00:20,579 --> 00:00:22,414
- I have up here.
4
00:00:30,563 --> 00:00:31,931
- Late again?
5
00:00:32,032 --> 00:00:35,266
- Yeah, I have this thing
where I don't care.
6
00:00:35,370 --> 00:00:37,572
- Oh, Max, I meant to ask you.
7
00:00:37,675 --> 00:00:39,543
Which one of your masterpieces
8
00:00:39,645 --> 00:00:41,011
would you like to donate
9
00:00:41,113 --> 00:00:42,848
to tomorrow's
school art auction?
10
00:00:42,950 --> 00:00:44,584
- Gosh, Mrs. Matson,
I don't know.
11
00:00:44,686 --> 00:00:47,955
There's so many to choose from.
- Hmm.
12
00:00:48,059 --> 00:00:51,561
- [mocking] So many
to choose from.
13
00:00:51,665 --> 00:00:53,999
- Maybe I'll make a new one.
14
00:00:54,102 --> 00:00:55,803
- Well, whatever it is, Max,
I'm sure it will bring in
15
00:00:55,905 --> 00:00:57,973
a lot of money for the school.
16
00:00:58,075 --> 00:01:01,077
Phoebe, when are you going
to start your project?
17
00:01:01,181 --> 00:01:03,015
- Um, actually,
I just finished it.
18
00:01:03,117 --> 00:01:06,052
I call it... "Horse."
19
00:01:06,155 --> 00:01:08,696
-Looks like it was
made by a horse.
20
00:01:10,937 --> 00:01:12,838
- Max, funny and talented.
21
00:01:12,940 --> 00:01:15,975
And Phoebe... always on time.
22
00:01:18,149 --> 00:01:19,416
- I don't get it.
23
00:01:19,518 --> 00:01:21,719
Why is art so easy for you
and so hard for me?
24
00:01:21,821 --> 00:01:23,088
We're twins.
25
00:01:23,191 --> 00:01:25,492
- Let's ask your horse monster.
26
00:01:25,595 --> 00:01:28,363
Throw me in the garbage, Max!
27
00:01:28,466 --> 00:01:30,300
Neighhhh!
28
00:01:37,081 --> 00:01:38,848
- Max!
29
00:01:38,950 --> 00:01:41,385
- I'm sorry, Mrs. Matson,
I didn't see it there.
30
00:01:41,488 --> 00:01:45,123
- MRS. MATSON: It's beautiful.
31
00:01:45,227 --> 00:01:47,528
- What?
- What?
32
00:01:47,631 --> 00:01:51,801
- Even when you fall,
you create magic.
33
00:01:51,906 --> 00:01:55,073
Take it in, class.
34
00:01:55,177 --> 00:01:57,245
- I can do that, too, you know.
35
00:01:57,347 --> 00:02:03,484
Hmm...
- [splash]
36
00:02:03,591 --> 00:02:06,392
- I call this one
37
00:02:06,496 --> 00:02:09,405
"How much do I owe you
for those shoes?"
38
00:02:12,847 --> 00:02:15,215
- ♪
39
00:02:15,318 --> 00:02:18,219
- WOMAN: ♪ What you see
is not what you get ♪
40
00:02:18,322 --> 00:02:21,424
♪ Living our lives
with a secret ♪
41
00:02:21,528 --> 00:02:24,730
♪ We fit right in,
bet you never guessed ♪
42
00:02:24,834 --> 00:02:27,902
♪ Living our lives
just like all the rest ♪
43
00:02:28,006 --> 00:02:31,473
♪ A picture-perfect family
is what we try to be ♪
44
00:02:31,577 --> 00:02:34,879
♪ Look closer, you might
see the crazy things we do ♪
45
00:02:34,983 --> 00:02:37,919
♪ This isn't make-believe,
it's our reality ♪
46
00:02:38,023 --> 00:02:40,957
♪ Just your average family
trying to be normal ♪
47
00:02:41,060 --> 00:02:42,761
♪ And stay out of trouble ♪
48
00:02:42,863 --> 00:02:46,732
♪ Living a double life ♪
49
00:02:55,186 --> 00:02:56,289
- What?
50
00:02:56,292 --> 00:02:57,693
Another one?
51
00:02:57,794 --> 00:03:00,428
- I told you the costume
shop was having a sale.
52
00:03:02,402 --> 00:03:04,136
- Not your costume, Colosso.
53
00:03:04,238 --> 00:03:06,680
I just lost another
follower on Evilgram.
54
00:03:06,783 --> 00:03:08,751
Why do you think
I'm losing so many?
55
00:03:08,853 --> 00:03:10,720
- 'Cause moving here
made you soft.
56
00:03:10,822 --> 00:03:12,222
You used to post
pics of yourself
57
00:03:12,325 --> 00:03:14,092
firing rockets at satellites.
58
00:03:14,194 --> 00:03:17,263
Now you're just waiting for me
to sit on a whoopee cushion.
59
00:03:17,367 --> 00:03:19,568
- [farting sound]
60
00:03:19,670 --> 00:03:22,105
- [laughs] That's funny--
I gotta post that.
61
00:03:22,208 --> 00:03:23,508
- No, you don't.
62
00:03:23,610 --> 00:03:27,946
Hi-yaaaah!
63
00:03:28,051 --> 00:03:30,719
Waaaaaa...
64
00:03:30,822 --> 00:03:34,291
I just saved you from losing
more followers!
65
00:03:34,395 --> 00:03:35,729
- You're right.
66
00:03:35,831 --> 00:03:38,065
I gotta get my edge back.
67
00:03:38,168 --> 00:03:40,904
Let's get a picture
of me taking out a satellite.
68
00:03:41,007 --> 00:03:42,607
- COLOSSO: Attaboy.
69
00:03:42,709 --> 00:03:46,111
- [laughs]
70
00:03:46,215 --> 00:03:48,650
- Now what are we
going to do next time?
71
00:03:50,489 --> 00:03:53,657
- Take the selfie before
I light the fuse.
72
00:03:53,760 --> 00:03:56,128
- Yes, grasshopper.
73
00:04:01,240 --> 00:04:03,875
- Oh... you found
the art supplies.
74
00:04:06,055 --> 00:04:08,123
- Yeah, weird, they were
in the back of the garage
75
00:04:08,225 --> 00:04:11,794
under the power tools in this
box labeled "Keep Out."
76
00:04:11,898 --> 00:04:13,031
- Uhh...
- Really?
77
00:04:13,133 --> 00:04:14,634
- Weird!
- Anyway...
78
00:04:14,736 --> 00:04:16,837
now with a little hard
work, my art can earn
79
00:04:16,939 --> 00:04:18,773
more money at
the auction than Max's.
80
00:04:18,875 --> 00:04:20,143
- That's the spirit, Phoebe!
81
00:04:20,245 --> 00:04:21,879
Keep reaching for the stars!
82
00:04:21,981 --> 00:04:24,750
Just don't paint them.
- [laughs]
83
00:04:24,853 --> 00:04:26,553
- Hey, hey, you two--let's...
84
00:04:26,656 --> 00:04:27,856
- I'm sorry.
85
00:04:27,958 --> 00:04:30,560
It's just she keep ruining
the refrigerator for me.
86
00:04:34,569 --> 00:04:37,003
- Nothing can ruin
the refrigerator for you, Dad.
87
00:04:41,814 --> 00:04:43,916
- Listen, we're gonna
support Phoebe, all right?
88
00:04:44,018 --> 00:04:46,319
That's why I signed your dad
up to be the auctioneer
89
00:04:46,422 --> 00:04:48,223
at the art fundraiser.
90
00:04:48,325 --> 00:04:50,993
- Why, because I'm loud,
boisterous, and in your face?
91
00:04:51,096 --> 00:04:52,297
- Mm-hmm.
- [shouting] Sold to my wife
92
00:04:52,399 --> 00:04:54,833
who knows me so well!
93
00:04:54,936 --> 00:04:57,838
- [shouting] Why are we yelling?
94
00:04:57,941 --> 00:05:01,377
- That's how auctioneers
get people to pay for art.
95
00:05:01,481 --> 00:05:03,882
- You have to get people
to pay for Phoebe's art?
96
00:05:03,985 --> 00:05:06,392
- [shouting] You're gonna
need a lot more than yelling!
97
00:05:19,116 --> 00:05:20,384
- I see you found
the 10-foot-pole
98
00:05:20,486 --> 00:05:21,987
girls won't go near you with.
99
00:05:22,089 --> 00:05:24,223
Whoa!
100
00:05:24,325 --> 00:05:27,360
- No, I'm going to vault myself
into the Hiddenville Zoo
101
00:05:27,464 --> 00:05:29,999
and then recruit a gorilla army.
102
00:05:30,102 --> 00:05:32,536
I'll have my Evilgram
followers back by midnight.
103
00:05:32,639 --> 00:05:35,508
- [crash]
104
00:05:35,611 --> 00:05:37,912
- Ooh...
105
00:05:38,015 --> 00:05:40,649
Mom's gonna be mad
at you for that!
106
00:05:42,522 --> 00:05:45,391
- And you're gonna be
mad at me for doing this.
107
00:05:45,495 --> 00:05:47,796
- [crash]
- MAX: Ow!
108
00:05:50,870 --> 00:05:52,671
- Come on, Phoebe, you can make
something better than Max
109
00:05:52,773 --> 00:05:54,273
for the art auction!
110
00:05:54,376 --> 00:05:56,411
Art powers, activate!
111
00:05:56,513 --> 00:06:01,515
- [classical music]
112
00:06:27,204 --> 00:06:28,470
- I've done it!
113
00:06:28,572 --> 00:06:31,541
I knew if I just put my heart
into it, I could create...
114
00:06:31,644 --> 00:06:33,545
Mt. Suckamanjaro.
115
00:06:36,119 --> 00:06:38,020
No one's gonna
pay money for this.
116
00:06:38,123 --> 00:06:40,224
They'll be too busy throwing up.
117
00:06:41,929 --> 00:06:45,463
- [panting]
118
00:06:47,739 --> 00:06:50,740
I feel like your
art project looks.
119
00:06:50,843 --> 00:06:53,144
- Uh, rough night at the zoo?
120
00:06:55,418 --> 00:06:57,453
- Turns out gorillas
really like playing
121
00:06:57,555 --> 00:06:59,456
Max in the Middle.
122
00:07:06,576 --> 00:07:08,277
Not giving up yet, Colosso.
123
00:07:08,379 --> 00:07:12,716
I will post something devious to
prove that I am not going soft.
124
00:07:12,821 --> 00:07:15,222
- Will that be before or after
125
00:07:15,325 --> 00:07:18,293
your lilac-scented bubble bath?
126
00:07:18,396 --> 00:07:20,297
- Oh, I'm sorry,
did the gorillas
127
00:07:20,399 --> 00:07:24,235
use you as a soccer ball or me?
128
00:07:24,340 --> 00:07:27,507
- Max, you've gotta tell me
how do you get your art ideas?
129
00:07:27,611 --> 00:07:28,912
Do you think about them?
130
00:07:29,013 --> 00:07:30,081
DO you not think about them?
131
00:07:30,183 --> 00:07:33,585
Do you take bubble baths
in front of Colosso?
132
00:07:33,689 --> 00:07:35,990
- Phoebe, my artistic brilliance
133
00:07:36,092 --> 00:07:37,860
is not something
that can be taught.
134
00:07:37,963 --> 00:07:41,798
My art projects come from
a place deep within my soul.
135
00:07:41,902 --> 00:07:43,136
- [zooming sound]
136
00:07:43,238 --> 00:07:46,874
- Here's your
latest art project, Max.
137
00:07:46,978 --> 00:07:50,412
- I think Billy has
keys to your soul.
138
00:07:50,517 --> 00:07:52,451
I can't believe you've been
using him to fetch art for you
139
00:07:52,553 --> 00:07:53,920
from around the world.
140
00:07:54,022 --> 00:07:55,390
- Actually, I get
them from a dumpster
141
00:07:55,492 --> 00:07:59,127
behind the art
school across town.
142
00:07:59,231 --> 00:08:02,966
- You're not an artist
at all--you're a trash man.
143
00:08:03,070 --> 00:08:05,038
- Hey, Billy's a trash man.
144
00:08:05,141 --> 00:08:07,082
I'm the guy that's gonna
make more money than you
145
00:08:07,184 --> 00:08:08,518
at the art auction.
146
00:08:08,620 --> 00:08:10,721
- How lazy, how despicable...
147
00:08:10,823 --> 00:08:14,059
how quickly can you get me
something better than Max's?
148
00:08:14,163 --> 00:08:15,330
- Don't do it, Billy.
149
00:08:15,431 --> 00:08:17,098
- [sighs] Sorry,
Phoebe, I work for Max.
150
00:08:17,201 --> 00:08:19,369
- Here's 20 bucks.
- Sorry, Max, I work for Phoebe.
151
00:08:19,472 --> 00:08:22,139
- [zooming sound]
152
00:08:27,185 --> 00:08:29,786
- Wow, Max, that's
a beautiful painting.
153
00:08:29,889 --> 00:08:33,057
It really shows your
sweet, sensitive side.
154
00:08:33,161 --> 00:08:35,696
- That's a problem--I'll fix it.
155
00:08:39,338 --> 00:08:42,640
- [scoffs] So you
like girls with goatees.
156
00:08:42,744 --> 00:08:45,545
♪ Noted ♪
157
00:08:48,220 --> 00:08:50,454
- Oh, Phoebe, take Max's vase
158
00:08:50,557 --> 00:08:52,725
over to the masterpiece corner.
159
00:08:52,827 --> 00:08:55,329
- Um, actually, Ms.
Matson, I made this.
160
00:08:55,432 --> 00:08:57,933
- Really? It's stunning.
161
00:08:58,036 --> 00:08:59,737
Well, I take back everything
I was saying about you
162
00:08:59,839 --> 00:09:02,040
in the teacher's lounge.
- Ha!
163
00:09:05,549 --> 00:09:09,657
- You might be giving
Max a run for his money.
164
00:09:09,762 --> 00:09:13,398
- Well, I gave
somebody money to run.
165
00:09:13,502 --> 00:09:15,169
- [in country accent]
Going once, twice,
166
00:09:15,271 --> 00:09:17,906
sold to Principal Bradford!
167
00:09:18,009 --> 00:09:20,644
That's my cowboy
auctioneer voice.
168
00:09:20,747 --> 00:09:23,148
[in British accent] I can also
do a fancy-pants auctioneer
169
00:09:23,251 --> 00:09:26,553
if it pleases the principal.
170
00:09:26,657 --> 00:09:28,358
- It doesn't.
171
00:09:28,460 --> 00:09:29,527
I'll be over there...
172
00:09:29,630 --> 00:09:32,464
talking to the single moms.
173
00:09:32,567 --> 00:09:35,536
Joyce, is that a new sweater?
174
00:09:35,639 --> 00:09:37,306
Whaaat?
175
00:09:40,981 --> 00:09:42,582
- Something wrong, Max?
176
00:09:42,683 --> 00:09:44,817
- I'm just losing
followers on Evilgram.
177
00:09:44,921 --> 00:09:46,956
- Aww, well, you've
got lots of friends.
178
00:09:47,059 --> 00:09:50,360
Sarah likes you.
179
00:09:50,463 --> 00:09:54,231
What's that on her face?
180
00:09:54,336 --> 00:09:56,905
- Whole lot of crazy.
181
00:10:02,317 --> 00:10:03,985
- Thanks for the vase, Billy.
182
00:10:04,087 --> 00:10:06,428
Sorry, Max, guess there's a new
fake artist in the family.
183
00:10:06,531 --> 00:10:09,332
- It's dumpster art--
don't be too proud.
184
00:10:09,435 --> 00:10:12,503
- Actually, Phoebe's
is from the museum.
185
00:10:12,607 --> 00:10:14,942
Which reminds me, I gotta
return it before they close.
186
00:10:15,045 --> 00:10:17,513
- That's a funny joke, Billy.
187
00:10:17,616 --> 00:10:20,484
Please tell me
that's a joke, Billy.
188
00:10:20,587 --> 00:10:22,588
- You said you wanted
something better than Max,
189
00:10:22,690 --> 00:10:24,624
so I went to the Hiddenville
Art Museum.
190
00:10:24,727 --> 00:10:26,328
- BOTH: What?!
191
00:10:26,430 --> 00:10:28,598
- Billy, you stole
it from the museum?
192
00:10:28,701 --> 00:10:30,735
- Relax, Phoebe,
it's not worth much.
193
00:10:30,838 --> 00:10:32,806
The sign said it's priceless.
194
00:10:39,919 --> 00:10:41,520
- [smirking] What's priceless
195
00:10:41,622 --> 00:10:44,957
is the look on
Phoebe's face right now.
196
00:10:45,061 --> 00:10:48,830
- Billy, "priceless" means
it's really expensive.
197
00:10:48,934 --> 00:10:52,103
- Where do these
words come from?
198
00:10:52,207 --> 00:10:53,941
- We could go
to jail for stealing.
199
00:10:54,043 --> 00:10:55,811
We've gotta get it back
before the auction starts.
200
00:10:55,913 --> 00:10:56,779
- [gavel raps]
201
00:10:56,881 --> 00:10:58,416
- Let's get
this auction started.
202
00:10:58,517 --> 00:11:00,984
- Yee-hoo!
203
00:11:09,210 --> 00:11:10,944
- We can't let
anybody buy that vase.
204
00:11:11,046 --> 00:11:11,512
How are we gonna fix this?
- We?
205
00:11:11,513 --> 00:11:13,081
This is a you problem,
206
00:11:13,183 --> 00:11:15,717
as in you an art thief, girl.
207
00:11:20,696 --> 00:11:22,097
- All right, Billy,
it's up to us.
208
00:11:22,199 --> 00:11:23,766
As soon as I get
that vase, you take it
209
00:11:23,868 --> 00:11:25,369
and return it to the museum.
210
00:11:25,470 --> 00:11:27,872
- Good evening, parents,
students...
211
00:11:27,975 --> 00:11:30,209
Joyce.
212
00:11:30,312 --> 00:11:32,213
I'd like to introduce
the only parent
213
00:11:32,315 --> 00:11:34,283
who would agree
to be the auctioneer,
214
00:11:34,386 --> 00:11:36,520
Hank Thunderman.
- [cheering]
215
00:11:36,622 --> 00:11:38,623
- Ha, that's my wife.
[chuckles]
216
00:11:38,726 --> 00:11:42,395
- I'm as surprised
as everyone else.
217
00:11:42,499 --> 00:11:46,267
- All right, let's get
the evening started with...
218
00:11:46,371 --> 00:11:48,006
- Not the vase, not the vase!
219
00:11:48,108 --> 00:11:50,542
- ...this beautiful vase,
220
00:11:50,646 --> 00:11:53,414
which is made by...
Phoebe Thunderman?
221
00:11:53,517 --> 00:11:56,819
Is there another Phoebe
Thunderman at this school?
222
00:11:56,923 --> 00:11:58,524
- Max, did you help
her with that?
223
00:11:58,626 --> 00:12:00,727
- Nope, she stole
it from a museum.
224
00:12:00,830 --> 00:12:05,205
- Oh, silly,
don't be so jealous.
225
00:12:05,310 --> 00:12:08,479
- Okay, let's get
the bidding started at $25.
226
00:12:08,583 --> 00:12:10,917
Do I hear $25--$25.
227
00:12:11,020 --> 00:12:12,788
Thank you, ma'am.
- This is good.
228
00:12:12,890 --> 00:12:15,091
When Mom buys the vase, we can
trick her into giving it to me.
229
00:12:15,193 --> 00:12:17,995
- Fifty dollars.
- What?
230
00:12:18,099 --> 00:12:19,866
- Seventy dollars.
231
00:12:19,968 --> 00:12:22,369
My daughter made that
vase, so you understand.
232
00:12:22,472 --> 00:12:24,173
- I totally get it.
233
00:12:24,275 --> 00:12:27,111
Eighty dollars.
234
00:12:27,214 --> 00:12:29,315
- Oh, it's gonna be like that.
235
00:12:29,418 --> 00:12:30,819
One hundred dollars.
236
00:12:31,172 --> 00:12:32,839
- Okay, could I get $120
237
00:12:32,941 --> 00:12:35,676
from someone I do not
share a bank account with.
238
00:12:38,249 --> 00:12:40,718
One-twenty... anyone?
239
00:12:40,821 --> 00:12:42,322
- Yes, over here.
240
00:12:42,424 --> 00:12:44,492
I can't raise my hand.
241
00:12:44,594 --> 00:12:46,128
- Flapping counts.
242
00:12:46,230 --> 00:12:47,363
- Does it, Hank?
243
00:12:47,464 --> 00:12:50,733
Does it?
244
00:12:50,837 --> 00:12:52,571
- Well, I mean, according
to the auctioneer's handbook--
245
00:12:52,673 --> 00:12:54,874
- Hank!
- Sold to my wife
246
00:12:54,977 --> 00:12:57,212
who is clearly the boss of me.
247
00:12:57,315 --> 00:12:59,817
- [applause]
248
00:13:02,323 --> 00:13:03,590
- Mom, you won my vase.
249
00:13:03,692 --> 00:13:04,999
Here, let me get
it wrapped for you.
250
00:13:05,101 --> 00:13:06,669
Take this to the museum--
I'll handle Mom.
251
00:13:06,770 --> 00:13:08,904
- Okay.
252
00:13:09,008 --> 00:13:11,109
- [vase shatters]
253
00:13:11,212 --> 00:13:13,880
- Oh, no, my masterpiece.
254
00:13:13,983 --> 00:13:15,684
- Phoebe, what happened?
255
00:13:15,786 --> 00:13:17,420
I don't know--it just slipped,
256
00:13:17,522 --> 00:13:19,390
but I will make you
another one, I promise.
257
00:13:19,492 --> 00:13:21,126
In fact, I'll go
do that right now.
258
00:13:21,228 --> 00:13:22,629
- Aww, that's too bad.
259
00:13:22,731 --> 00:13:24,999
Yeah... make sure she pays.
260
00:13:30,056 --> 00:13:31,591
- What's going on?
261
00:13:31,693 --> 00:13:32,826
Why are you smiling?
262
00:13:32,927 --> 00:13:34,828
- Just taking care of problems.
263
00:13:34,932 --> 00:13:38,734
- I was too late--
the museum's closed.
264
00:13:38,838 --> 00:13:40,405
- Why are you still smiling?
265
00:13:40,507 --> 00:13:43,909
- 'Cause my face
freezes when I freak out.
266
00:13:44,013 --> 00:13:45,314
- It's okay, Phoebe.
267
00:13:45,416 --> 00:13:48,851
I hear we get pudding in jail.
268
00:13:48,955 --> 00:13:50,723
- No one's going to jail.
269
00:13:50,825 --> 00:13:52,059
We are still gonna
return the vase.
270
00:13:52,161 --> 00:13:54,762
We just have to sneak in after
hours without permission.
271
00:13:54,865 --> 00:13:57,399
- You mean break in?
272
00:13:57,502 --> 00:13:59,270
- Don't put Max
words in my mouth.
273
00:13:59,372 --> 00:14:01,741
You make it sound so...
- Evil?
274
00:14:01,844 --> 00:14:03,144
Because it is.
275
00:14:03,245 --> 00:14:05,687
In fact, a break-in selfie
is just what I need
276
00:14:05,790 --> 00:14:07,791
to get my followers
back on Evilgram.
277
00:14:07,894 --> 00:14:10,695
- Ugh, I'm so gonna regret this,
but I could use your help.
278
00:14:10,798 --> 00:14:13,433
Nora, Mom and Dad can't
find out that we're...
279
00:14:13,536 --> 00:14:16,537
- ...breaking into a museum.
280
00:14:16,641 --> 00:14:18,042
- Yeah, sure, what he said.
281
00:14:18,143 --> 00:14:20,144
Just keep the auction
going until we get back.
282
00:14:20,247 --> 00:14:21,348
- ...from breaking
into a museum.
283
00:14:21,449 --> 00:14:23,817
- Stop it!
284
00:14:23,920 --> 00:14:29,056
- [suspense music]
285
00:14:29,162 --> 00:14:32,197
- [whistling]
286
00:14:47,526 --> 00:14:49,126
- Okay, we're in.
287
00:14:49,229 --> 00:14:50,396
We just gotta make this quick.
288
00:14:50,497 --> 00:14:53,466
I don't want to know what
jail pudding tastes like.
289
00:14:53,570 --> 00:14:56,371
- Phoebe, relax--I disabled
the security cameras.
290
00:14:56,474 --> 00:14:59,342
- And I found a free
King Tut lollipop.
291
00:14:59,446 --> 00:15:01,614
Mmm... history.
292
00:15:03,319 --> 00:15:06,160
- Art thief action selfie.
293
00:15:07,866 --> 00:15:09,200
- GUARD: [whistling]
- Oh, no.
294
00:15:09,302 --> 00:15:10,537
- Somebody's coming and
we're gonna get caught
295
00:15:10,638 --> 00:15:12,139
and I can't stop smiling again
because I'm freaking out.
296
00:15:12,241 --> 00:15:14,242
What are we gonna do?
- Phoebe!
297
00:15:14,345 --> 00:15:16,446
Stop smiling and hide!
298
00:15:23,159 --> 00:15:26,461
- [whistling]
299
00:15:31,339 --> 00:15:34,074
- [sighs] This
pitcher's getting heavy.
300
00:15:34,177 --> 00:15:36,344
- Technically the Egyptians
called that a ewer.
301
00:15:36,447 --> 00:15:38,015
- Technically it's gonna
make the same noise
302
00:15:38,117 --> 00:15:41,586
when it hits the floor.
303
00:15:41,690 --> 00:15:44,892
- Hang in there, guys,
he'll be gone soon.
304
00:15:44,996 --> 00:15:48,398
- Time for my nightly break.
305
00:15:48,502 --> 00:15:50,836
My nightly dance break.
306
00:15:50,939 --> 00:15:54,241
[beatboxing]
307
00:15:59,485 --> 00:16:01,420
- I don't know who
looks more ridiculous...
308
00:16:01,523 --> 00:16:03,457
us or him.
309
00:16:05,062 --> 00:16:07,270
I'm gonna go with him.
- Yeah, definitely him.
310
00:16:11,781 --> 00:16:14,915
- Okay, folks, we are
down to our last item.
311
00:16:15,019 --> 00:16:17,320
- Last item... oh, no.
312
00:16:17,423 --> 00:16:19,191
- Oh, that must be
Max's painting.
313
00:16:19,293 --> 00:16:20,559
Where is he, anyway?
314
00:16:20,661 --> 00:16:21,596
- With Phoebe.
- Where's Phoebe?
315
00:16:21,697 --> 00:16:22,598
- With Billy.
- Where's Billy?
316
00:16:22,699 --> 00:16:23,632
- With Max.
- Where's--
317
00:16:23,733 --> 00:16:26,101
- Shh... the auction's starting.
318
00:16:26,204 --> 00:16:27,838
- Who wants to start the bidding
319
00:16:27,940 --> 00:16:30,609
on my son's one-of-a-kind...
320
00:16:30,712 --> 00:16:33,279
bearded girl?
321
00:16:33,382 --> 00:16:36,451
Um, who would like to start
the bidding at $25.
322
00:16:36,555 --> 00:16:37,755
- Twenty-five!
323
00:16:37,857 --> 00:16:39,925
- I've got $25 from
the girl I keep telling
324
00:16:40,028 --> 00:16:42,629
to stay out of my yard.
325
00:16:42,732 --> 00:16:45,033
Do I have $30... anyone?
326
00:16:45,136 --> 00:16:46,670
Anybody?
327
00:16:46,772 --> 00:16:49,674
- You gonna bid on Max's
painting, Mom?
328
00:16:49,777 --> 00:16:53,646
That? Looks like it
came from a dumpster.
329
00:16:53,751 --> 00:16:56,618
- I get it--you love
Phoebe the most.
330
00:16:56,721 --> 00:16:59,757
- That's not true.
331
00:16:59,861 --> 00:17:02,595
- If only there was a way
for you to prove it.
332
00:17:02,699 --> 00:17:04,900
- HANK: Twenty-five going
once, going twice...
333
00:17:05,003 --> 00:17:06,444
- [shouting] Twenty-six dollars.
334
00:17:06,545 --> 00:17:09,146
I love my son!
335
00:17:09,249 --> 00:17:12,984
- Twenty-seven...
I love your son more.
336
00:17:13,089 --> 00:17:14,590
- Twenty-eight dollars.
- Twenty-nine.
337
00:17:14,692 --> 00:17:16,293
- Thirty!
338
00:17:22,539 --> 00:17:24,106
- [clang]
339
00:17:24,208 --> 00:17:27,309
- [techno music from headphones]
340
00:17:31,758 --> 00:17:34,459
- This is not the kind
of evil I was hoping for.
341
00:17:34,562 --> 00:17:35,896
- I know, all this gold
342
00:17:35,998 --> 00:17:38,633
is giving me a kink in my neck.
343
00:17:38,736 --> 00:17:40,937
- That's what
you're thinking about?
344
00:17:41,040 --> 00:17:43,441
- Well, that and I
shouldn't care so much
345
00:17:43,544 --> 00:17:44,979
about competing with you.
346
00:17:45,081 --> 00:17:46,482
- Phoebe, it's not a
competition.
347
00:17:46,583 --> 00:17:48,784
We're on a team--
I'm the captain,
348
00:17:48,887 --> 00:17:51,688
you're the weird bus driver
that takes us to away games.
349
00:17:51,791 --> 00:17:56,127
- I am not Bus Driver Sally.
350
00:17:56,232 --> 00:17:58,066
- BILLY: Uh-oh, bad news, guys!
351
00:17:58,169 --> 00:17:59,637
- Oh, do you have to go
to the bathroom?
352
00:17:59,738 --> 00:18:02,372
- Well, I do now.
353
00:18:02,475 --> 00:18:04,376
I was talking about the guard.
354
00:18:04,479 --> 00:18:07,455
He knows the vase is missing.
355
00:18:07,558 --> 00:18:10,459
- Joe... Joe, you
gotta get down here.
356
00:18:10,563 --> 00:18:12,430
The bird vase is missing.
357
00:18:12,532 --> 00:18:15,368
[laughs] No, I wasn't dancing!
358
00:18:18,873 --> 00:18:20,341
- Billy, his back
is turned--go now.
359
00:18:20,443 --> 00:18:22,977
- You want me to go to
the bathroom in the ewer.
360
00:18:23,080 --> 00:18:24,948
Okay...
- PHOEBE: No!
361
00:18:25,050 --> 00:18:26,818
Go put the bird vase back!
362
00:18:26,921 --> 00:18:28,622
- Oh, right.
363
00:18:32,696 --> 00:18:34,264
- Good job, Billy.
364
00:18:34,366 --> 00:18:36,835
Max?
365
00:18:36,938 --> 00:18:38,839
Yeah, I snuck in here,
366
00:18:38,941 --> 00:18:41,575
but don't tell your mummy.
367
00:18:43,849 --> 00:18:45,783
- This isn't happening!
368
00:18:45,885 --> 00:18:47,519
Get back here, Max!
369
00:18:55,836 --> 00:18:58,004
- Wait...
370
00:18:58,106 --> 00:19:00,707
something's not
right here, either.
371
00:19:02,613 --> 00:19:05,815
- All right, what's
going on, Happy Feet?
372
00:19:05,919 --> 00:19:08,327
- I was patrolling, not dancing,
373
00:19:08,430 --> 00:19:10,331
when I noticed
the bird vase was gone.
374
00:19:13,405 --> 00:19:16,741
- What are you talking
about--it's right there.
375
00:19:16,845 --> 00:19:18,546
- [clank echoes from far away]
376
00:19:22,186 --> 00:19:24,355
- You want to explain that?
377
00:19:28,497 --> 00:19:30,765
- I am not a good guard, am I?
378
00:19:35,208 --> 00:19:38,110
- Escape selfie.
379
00:19:41,586 --> 00:19:43,353
- One-hundred and forty.
- Hundred and forty-one.
380
00:19:43,455 --> 00:19:45,323
- One-hundred and forty-two.
- One-hundred forty-three.
381
00:19:45,426 --> 00:19:47,694
- One-hundred forty-four.
- Two hundred dollars.
382
00:19:47,796 --> 00:19:50,197
[gasps] I don't
have that much money.
383
00:19:50,300 --> 00:19:53,002
- [gasps] Then I guess ya lose.
384
00:19:54,774 --> 00:19:56,308
- This doesn't
have to end, Sarah.
385
00:19:56,410 --> 00:19:58,111
You can borrow money
from your parents,
386
00:19:58,213 --> 00:20:01,415
skip college, get
a small business loan.
387
00:20:01,519 --> 00:20:03,186
- Or...
388
00:20:05,158 --> 00:20:07,166
I win, suckas!
389
00:20:07,269 --> 00:20:09,836
[laughs maniacally]
390
00:20:09,939 --> 00:20:12,308
- Never bet on crazy.
391
00:20:12,410 --> 00:20:14,811
- Well, that's it, folks.
392
00:20:14,914 --> 00:20:16,982
As they say
in the auction game,
393
00:20:17,085 --> 00:20:18,786
I bid you farewell.
394
00:20:18,888 --> 00:20:20,889
- Go home, Hank.
395
00:20:20,991 --> 00:20:22,792
In fact, let's
all get out of here.
396
00:20:22,894 --> 00:20:25,161
Joyce, you with me?
397
00:20:25,265 --> 00:20:27,933
Where's Joyce?
398
00:20:28,036 --> 00:20:31,238
I hate this school.
399
00:20:31,342 --> 00:20:33,510
- So you're probably
still wondering
400
00:20:33,613 --> 00:20:35,580
where Max, Phoebe,
and Billy are.
401
00:20:35,682 --> 00:20:37,250
Don't get mad, but they're--
402
00:20:37,352 --> 00:20:40,420
- They're right here.
403
00:20:40,525 --> 00:20:43,126
- And Phoebe didn't
make you a new vase.
404
00:20:43,229 --> 00:20:45,363
Maybe you're right
to love Max more.
405
00:20:45,465 --> 00:20:47,733
- [scoffs] Guys,
I want to talk to you
406
00:20:47,836 --> 00:20:49,237
about something Nora said.
407
00:20:49,339 --> 00:20:52,041
- Nora's a liar!
408
00:20:52,144 --> 00:20:53,610
- [sighs]
409
00:20:53,712 --> 00:20:55,613
- She's just confused.
410
00:20:55,716 --> 00:20:58,151
I don't love Phoebe
more than you.
411
00:20:58,254 --> 00:21:01,055
I love you both equally.
412
00:21:01,158 --> 00:21:03,893
- [whispers loudly]
I don't think she knows.
413
00:21:03,997 --> 00:21:05,831
- BARB: Knows what?
414
00:21:05,933 --> 00:21:11,776
- That we love you...
more than Dad?
415
00:21:11,883 --> 00:21:14,651
- Awww... you know,
I always suspected it,
416
00:21:14,754 --> 00:21:17,189
but it's just nice to hear.
417
00:21:17,292 --> 00:21:18,526
Shh.
418
00:21:25,672 --> 00:21:28,107
- [phone jingles]
- Haha!
419
00:21:28,210 --> 00:21:30,911
Thanks to my museum break-in,
my followers are coming back.
420
00:21:31,015 --> 00:21:33,183
- It wasn't a break-in.
421
00:21:33,285 --> 00:21:36,120
I left admission fees
on one of the displays.
422
00:21:36,224 --> 00:21:39,392
- You mean the money I took
to pay for this ice cream?
423
00:21:39,495 --> 00:21:42,197
- Well, it's fine, 'cause
I took the money from you.
424
00:21:44,371 --> 00:21:46,405
I do have one question, though.
425
00:21:46,507 --> 00:21:48,075
Do you have Billy steal your
artwork 'cause you're lazy
426
00:21:48,177 --> 00:21:49,911
or 'cause you're just
horrible at art like me.
427
00:21:50,013 --> 00:21:50,428
- It's 'cause I'm lazy.
428
00:21:50,529 --> 00:21:52,196
I'm actually really good at art.
429
00:21:52,298 --> 00:21:54,164
Here, check this out.
430
00:21:56,436 --> 00:21:58,136
- Wow, that's amazing.
431
00:21:58,238 --> 00:22:01,138
- Yeah, something I threw
together this morning.
432
00:22:01,241 --> 00:22:02,774
- Wait a minute, wasn't
that in the museum?
433
00:22:03,666 --> 00:22:05,806
- Yes, I'm back!
434
00:22:11,406 --> 00:22:15,740
- ♪
435
00:22:15,790 --> 00:22:20,340
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