Original subtitles

- Why Does Mr. Big Booty Look So Mad?

- It's Mr. Begbouday.

He Hates It When People Call Him "Big Booty."

[Objects Clatter]

But To Be Fair, That Is One Big Booty.

- Who's Making A Crack?

Is It Someone In The Rear?

[Laughter]

Oh, Laugh While You Can,

Because I've Graded Your Exams,

And Soon You'll Be The Butt Of The Joke.

- Max, What Is That?

- It's A Proton Particle Power Booster.

Made It With Spare Parts No One Was Using.

- Oh, Come On!

- This Is For Max Thunderman Day.

- Oh, Yeah, When Is That?

On The 12th Of Doesn't-Existuary?

- Snark Away, But After I Pull The Best Prank

This School Has Ever Seen,

There'll Be A Whole Day Named After Me.

Check It Out.

I'm Going To Clamp These Cables To A Giant Turkey--

- Okay, For Legal Reasons,

We Should Stop Listening To Him Now.

- Cherry, Here's Your Exam.

You Got 100%...

- [Happily] Oh! - Of The Answers Wrong.

- Oh.

- Miss Thunderman, B.

- Back Up, Big Booty.

Phoebe Is The Best Student In This Class.

She Studies Hard And Gets "A"S.

It's Her Thing.

- Cherry, Calm Down.

But She's Right; It's My Thing.

Sir.

- Max, What Is That?

- This? Just A Simple Machine I Made, Mr. Begbouday.

- Oh, Like The Simple Jalape�o Toilet Paper

You Made Last Week?

I'll Lock It In The Cabinet So No "Bouday" Gets Hurt.

- [Forced Laughing]

I Give That Joke An "A."

Speaking Of "A"S, Uh,

Shouldn't I Have Gotten One?

I Don't Think I Got Anything Wrong.

- You Didn't, But I Don't Give "A"S...

To Anyone, Ever.

It's My Thing.

- [Sighs]

- Phoebe, Looks Like We've Got A Big Big Booty Problem.

- It's Begbouday!

[Glass Shatters]

Both: Is It?

[Adventure Music]

- ? What You See Is Not What You Get ?

? Living Our Lives With A Secret ?

? We Fit Right In, Bet You Never Guessed ?

? 'Cause We're Living Our Lives Just Like All The Rest ?

? A Picture-Perfect Family Is What We Try To Be ?

? Look Closer, You Might See The Crazy Things We Do ?

? This Isn't Make-Believe ?

? It's Our Reality ?

? Just Your Average Family ?

? Trying To Be Normal Instead Of Trouble ?

? Living A Double Life ?

- A Teacher Who Doesn't Give "A"S?

That's Like A Cheeseburger Without Cheese,

A Pizza Without Cheese,

Nachos Without Cheese.

I Need "A"S Like Things Need Cheese.

- Is This About Your Awful Chemistry Teacher

With The Big...

Chip On His Shoulder?

- Yes, How Am I Supposed To Get Into Hero University

When I Have A Teacher Who Doesn't Give "A"S?

- I Have An Idea.

Why Don't You Go To...

[Yelling] Get Out Of The Way University?

- You Can Major In...

[Yelling] Move!

- All Right, Hold On.

Don't Worry.

Now, If My Baby Girl Says She Earned An "A,"

She's Gonna Get That "A."

I'm Going To Call Principal Bradford,

I'll Arrange A Little Parent-Teacher Conference,

And We Will Figure This Thing Out.

- That's A Great Idea.

Nobody Gets Anything Past Your Dad.

- Thanks, Dad. You Are The Best.

- [Chuckles]

Hey, Who Left The Back Door Open?

- Billy. - Nora.

Both: Max.

- [Laughing]

I Was Watching The Whole Time,

And I Still Don't Know How This Happened!

- [Grunting]

Come On.

- [Laughing]

- This Is For A Prank That's Gonna Be So Big,

The School's Going To Name An Entire Day After Me.

- Dancing Turkey Head Day?

- No, Max Thunderman Day.

You Know The Chemical In Turkeys

That You Make You Super Sleepy After You Eat 'Em?

- Of Course.

It's One Of The Top Ten Evil Chemicals,

Right After The Stuff In Asparagus

That Makes Your Tinkle Smell.

- Well, When I Steal My Machine Back,

I'm Going To Use It To Boost That Turkey Chemical

And Make Super Sleepy Sandwiches For All My Classmates.

- Then When They Fall Asleep,

You're Going To Draw Mustaches On Them, Right?

- I Am Now!

What Are You Doing Here?

- Dad's Having His Parent-Teacher Conference

With Mr. Begbouday.

[Gasps]

Oh, How Was Your Interview At Clown College?

- This Is My Camouflage Outfit.

I've Got Get Back In There And Get My Power Booster Back.

- [Sighs]

Good Luck, 'Cause He's Coming.

Sorry I Doubted Your Plan.

- Well, Turns Out Mr. Begbouday Has Hit Bottom

And Is Tired Of Turning The Other Cheek.

[Laughs]

The Point Is, He Quit.

- He Quit? But What About My Grade?

- You're Gonna Have To Ask Your New Chemistry Substitute.

- Will He Be Here Tomorrow?

- I Sure Will.

- Wait, Dad, You're Gonna Be Our New Chemistry Sub?

- Why Not, Right?

He Went To College, He's Got A License,

And He's A Scientific Genius.

What Did You Call Water Again?

- H2o.

- Stop Showing Off, Jimmy Neutron!

Hey, Come On. Let Me Show You Around.

Hey, You. Show This Guy Around.

- Dad Can't Be A Sub Here.

How Am I Going To Pull Off My Prank

With Thunderman Roaming The Halls?

- I Think It's Great.

He'll Right Wrongs, Stamp Out Injustice,

And Give Helpless Students The "A"S They Deserve.

- I'm Not Giving Up Yet.

As Long As No One Can See Me, This Isn't Over.

- Hi, Phoebs. Hey, Max.

- I'm A Locker!

- Let's Go, You Two!

Time For School!

Don't Forget To Close That Door.

- What Is The Big Deal About This Door?

- Yeah, What Are You Guys So Afraid Of?

[Squirrel Chattering] - Squirrel!

- Ah! The Outside Is Inside!

- Relax.

If Cartoons Have Taught Us Anything,

It's That Squirrels Are Loveable.

- [Hisses]

- Cartoons Lie!

[All Scream]

[School Bell Rings]

- [With German Accent] Hello, Future Scientists!

I Am Albert Einstein,

Und Velcome To Chemistry!

- What Have You Done?

- Hey, If Einstein Gets Me Into Hero University,

Then It's All Guten Tag.

- Phoebe, You Just Said, "Hello."

- Yeah, To An "A" In Chemistry.

What? What?

- Dad Will Not Ruin Max Thunderman Day.

I'm Getting My Power Booster Back.

[Dramatic Spy Music]

? ?

- Und Now, Because My Mustache Is Very Itchy,

I Present To You Your Real Substitute Teacher

And All-Around Cool Guy,

Hank Thunderman.

[Laughs] Thanks, Al.

Now, Class, I Know That You've Been Studying

Chemical Reactions.

So For Today's Experiment,

I Want You To Go Out, Find Items In The School,

Bring Them Back,

And Present Your Own Chemical Reactions.

Now, The Grade On This Experiment

Will Replace Your Last Exam Grade,

So Really Challenge Yourselves.

[Indistinct Chatter]

- Psst! Phoebe, Cover Me.

I'm Going To Melt This Lock With My Heat Breath.

- Psst, Max!

No.

Hey, Dad, Did You Say

You're Replacing The Exam Grades?

- Sure Did.

- Thunderman Wiping Out Injustice.

- Yikes. Are You Okay?

- That Was Just A Little Wink

To Let You Know I Appreciate It.

Come On, Max. We Got To Do Our Science Assignment.

- Uh, Just...

Getting Ready For Baseball Practice.

- With A Sledgehammer?

- Go Big Or Go Home.

- Have You Guys Caught The Squirrel Yet?

- Why Are You Wearing Max's Catcher's Outfit?

- Well, We Are Trying To Catch A Squirrel.

Plus, I Think It Looks Cute On Me.

[Squirrel Chattering] - Squirrel!

- Okay, All Right.

Everybody Just Stay Calm And--

[Screams]

[Glass Shatters]

- I'll Get It, Mom.

[Whooshing Noises]

And He's Safe.

- I Got This.

[Sizzling]

Well, At Least Now The Chair Matches The Tv.

- Hey, Maybe If We Open The Patio Doors,

He Might Run Out By Himself.

- Yeah, Yeah.

He's Called For Backup!

Save Yourselves!

[All Yelling]

- [Chuckles]

Thank You, Cliff.

Your Mint Candy-Soda Geyser Was Messy

But Well Worth It.

You Get An "A."

And You Get Towels.

All Right, Who's Next?

Hey, Buddy.

What You Doing Down There?

- You Know, Just Helping The Janitor

Look For His Keys.

- Oh.

- Found 'Em.

- Uh, You Can Help Me Open Up The Lab Cabinet

And Get The Cleaning Solution.

- I Love You, Dad.

- Max.

We Are At School.

It's "I Love You, Mr. Thunderman."

All Right.

Oh, Phoebe, You're Up.

- [Sighs]

Okay, Everyone.

My Experiment's Called--

Whoa!

Oops, I Accidentally Spilled Ink On You.

- Oh, No, My Lab Coat.

But I Was On My Way To A Science Party.

Now What Do I Do?

- Fix It With Chemistry.

[Applause]

That Ink Was Really An Acid-Based Liquid

That Disappears When Mixed With Carbon Dioxide.

Have Fun At Your Party.

- I Will...Now That I Know All That Stuff You Said.

[Applause]

- Well, Phoebe,

It Seems Everyone Enjoyed Your Show.

And Your Grade Is...

- Here Comes Your "A." [Giggles]

- A "D."

[Class Gasps]

- A--A "D"?

How Could You, Dad?

- Phoebe, We're At School.

It's "How Could You, Mr. Thunderman?"

- Hey, Phoebe. How Was School?

- Great. [Laughs]

I Laughed. I Learned.

Oh, And I Got A D In Chemistry From My Own Dad.

- Phoebe, I Told Everyone To Challenge Themselves.

You Didn't.

You Did The Same Disappearing Ink Bit

Back In Metroburg When You Were In The Seventh Grade.

- And I Got An "A"!

Come On, Dad.

You Were Supposed To Stamp Out Injustice

And Give Me The Grade I Deserve.

We Talked About This.

- Oh, I Don't Remember Talking About That.

- Do You Remember This?

- Ugh!

No One Can Ever Forget That. - [Sighs]

- I'm Sorry, Phoebe, But Your Grade Stands.

- I'm So Upset, I Can't Even Talk To You Right Now.

I'm Going To Cherry's.

- Need A Ride To Cherry's?

- So You're Not Going To Tell Dad We Left The Door Open

And The House Is Filled With Squirrels?

- I Don't Think I'll Have To

Now That We Took Care Of The Damage.

It's Like The Squirrel Smackdown Never Happened.

Max, You Want To Explain All Those Sandwiches?

- Not Really.

Do You Want To Explain All Those Blankets?

- Not Really.

- Then We Understand Each Other.

- Hi, Honey.

- Hey, Dad. - What Blankets?

- So How Was Your First Day?

- Well, I'm Pretty Sure Phoebe Hates Me--

- Fantastic! We Should Celebrate.

Let's Go Out To Dinner.

- Squirrel! - What?

- Oh. Mwah!

- All Right, Let's Go Eat.

- What Were You Guys Doing With These Blankets?

- Taking A Nap. - Making A Fort.

- What Blankets?

- Dad, I Had A Hard Time Sleeping Last Night,

Mostly Because I Thought I Kept Seeing Squirrels, But...

Also Because I Was Thinking About

How Unfairly You Treated Me.

So I've Decided To...

Transfer Out Of Your Class. - Transfer Out Of My Class.

- Wait, How Did You Already Know?

- I Just Got The Email From The Principal.

That, And I Read Your 500-Word Essay On Why.

- I Spent A Lot Of Time On It.

Did You Give It A D?

- Phoebe...

- Oh, Come On, Dad.

You're Just Being Hard On Me Because I'm Your Daughter.

- No, I'm Being Hard On You

Because You Are A Superhero.

And Grades Or No Grades,

Superheroes Don't Take The Easy Way Out,

Like Repeating An Old Assignment.

They Rise To The Challenge.

That's What I Was Trying To Teach You.

So You Still Want To Transfer, I'm Not Going To Stop You,

But Right Now, I Got To Get Ready.

- Get Ready? For What?

- Well, Because Of Someone's Transfer Request,

Principal Bradford's Coming To Evaluate My Class.

I Have To Prove I'm A Good Teacher,

Or I Lose My Job.

- But You Are A Good Teacher.

All The Kids Love You.

Well, Most Of Them.

- Oh, I'm Not Worried.

I Like Teaching.

I'm Totally Going To Ace This Evalu--

[Snores]

- Phoebe, I Think Dad Found My Sleepy Sandwiches

And Brought Them For Lunch.

- [Snoring]

- Yup, He Found 'Em.

- Wake Him Up, Max.

- I Can't.

And If I'm Being Honest,

I'm Fighting The Urge To Draw A Mustache On His Face.

- [Sighs] We've Got To Do Something.

He's About To Get Evaluated By Bradford.

He Could Lose His Job.

- But Then We'll Get A New Sub,

And That D Will Drop Off Your Record.

- [Sighs]

No, Max, Not This Time.

I'm A Superhero,

And Superheroes Always Rise To The Challenge.

- Well, This Supervillain Has A Legendary Prank To Pull.

See Ya.

Come On, Max.

Not Even The Most Evil Supervillain

Sacrifices His Own Father For A Stupid High School Stunt.

- But I Need It For Max Thunderman Day!

[Sighs] Fine, I'll Help.

But First...

The 'Stache.

- Clearly, We're No Match For These Squirrels.

We Need A Pro To Take Care Of This.

Can You Help Us Out?

- No Problem.

Go Wait In The Kitchen.

Show Yourself, Squirrel!

[High-Pitched Yelling]

Oh! There You Are, Tree Rat.

Listen, This Is My Turf.

You And Your Buddies Need To Move Along.

- [Chattering]

- Hey, There's No Reason To Bring My Mother Into This.

- [Chattering]

- Oh, That's It.

You Just Opened Up Yourself A Can Of Hippity Hop.

Whaaa!

[Ripping Noises]

[Squirrel Chattering, Dr. Colosso Yelling]

- Well?

- So The Squirrels Are Gonna Stay.

But, Uh...

Good News.

They've Agreed To Live In The Walls.

[Squirrel Chattering]

Correction:

We Have To Live In The Walls.

- Okay, He's Ready.

- He Looks Bananas.

- At Least You Can't Tell He's Asleep.

[Farts]

- My Childhood Is Officially Over.

- Come On, Max.

Let's Get Him Carefully Over To His Stool.

Come On.

More Carefully Than That.

[Sighs]

[School Bell Rings]

- Showtime.

- Well, Hank, You'd Better Wow Me.

I Don't Want To Have To Find Another Sub.

That Would Take Time, Effort,

A Respectable Work Ethic.

And I Have None Of Those.

- [Laughs Nervously]

Time To Take Your Seat, Mr. Bradford.

[Clears Throat]

Okay, Everybody.

Mr. Thunderman Would Like To Welcome You All

To Today's Lesson,

"The Magic Of Chemistry."

[Upbeat Music]

? ?

[Applause]

Thud! [Students Gasp]

- Why Are You Doing That?

- 'Cause We Can.

- Okay, Okay, Back To The Experiments.

[Crowd Gasps]

[Applause]

? ?

- Oh!

Wow!

[Laughs]

Wow, This Guy's Great.

The Lights, The Dancing--

That's Private School Stuff, People.

Where'd He Go?

- To...The Bathroom.

- Oh, Man.

I Am So Sore.

- [Laughs]

Oh, Tmi, Big Guy.

- Uh, Dad, I Think Your Evaluation Went Great.

"Chemistry Is Magic" Was A Fantastic Idea.

Very Powerful.

- Thank You, Phoebe.

Looks Like I Really Rose To The Challenge

With These Experiments.

- Thanks, Dad.

For Being So Awesome!

- You Guys Are A Weird Family.

But I've Seen All I Need To See.

Hank, You're Keeping Your Job. - [Laughs]

- Wait, So Can I Transfer Back Into Mr. Thunderman's Class?

- Ugh! You Are Nothing But Paperwork, Phoebe.

Hank, Just A Reminder.

I Still Need A Copy Of Your License.

- Oh! Copy It Right Now.

- This Is Your Driver's License. - Mm-Hmm.

- You're Not A Licensed Teacher, Are You?

- What? You Need A License To Teach?

- If Anyone Asks, You Never Taught Here.

Anyone Record This?

- Caught Every Second. - Ah.

Just--Oh, Look At That!

You'll Get This Back When You Graduate.

- But That Might Never Happen!

- Come On, Hank! We're Sitting Down To Eat.

- Coming!

- I Think Dad's Nose Pooped On His Lip.

- That's Not How The Body Works, Billy.

- Ah, I Tell You,

Wouldn't Mind Getting Back In The Classroom

With My Favorite Twins.

I Wish There Was A Way.

- Dad, You Could Go Back To School

And Get Your Teaching License.

- Yup, Sure Wish There Was A Way.

- Well, We Were Lucky To Have You As A Sub.

You Really Were A Great Teacher.

- Oh, Everybodies Wuves Each Other!

If You Don't Mind,

I'm Trying To Eat My Din--

[Snoring]

- What's Wrong With Max?

- [Laughs]

He's Just Getting A Lesson In Payback.

We Each Get Two Minutes To Draw On Max's Face.

[All Cheer]

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