Original subtitles

- Thanks for walking me home, Cole.

- Sure.

Thanks for saying you'd go to the dance with me tonight.

- Are you kidding?

It's all I've been thinking about ever since you asked me.

- I just asked you in your driveway.

- I know. 26 seconds ago.

27 now. 28, 29...

- [laughs]

Oh, I almost forgot.

Here, I got you this.

- How beautiful.

- The flower not you.

Not that you're not beautiful.

Okay, you talk now.

- I should get going. I'll see you tonight.

- In 3 hours, 10 seconds, and 25--okay, bye.

And that's how you talk to a boy.

Yow!

Hot, hot.

How did that happen?

- A dead flower?

- Cole gave it to me.

- Wow. He's a keeper.

- Cole didn't do this.

I accidentally burned it with my heat breath.

Isn't that weird?

- Yeah, but it happened to you,

so I don't care.

Now I care.

- Emergency family meeting!

- Everyone in the living room now.

- This is not a drill.

- He's fine.

I only buried him up to his neck.

- I wanted to know what a plant feels like.

- The Achilles comet is back.

- The Achilles comet? - That's terrible!

- Oh, no.

- You don't know what the Achilles comet is, do you?

- No idea. - Beats me.

- Not a clue.

- It's a comet that messes with the Earth's magnetic field

and causes our superpowers to go wonky.

- What does "wonky" mean?

Whoa!

Wonky. Got it.

[heroic theme]

- ♪ What you see is not what you get ♪

♪ Livin' our lives with a secret ♪

♪ We fit right in, bet you'll never guess ♪

♪ 'Cause we're livin' our lives just like all the rest ♪

♪ A picture-perfect family is what we try to be ♪

♪ The closer you might see ♪

♪ The crazy things we do ♪

♪ This isn't make believe ♪

♪ It's our reality ♪

♪ Just your average family ♪

♪ Just trying to be normal and stay out of trouble ♪

♪ Livin' a double life ♪

- Why do I have to stay like this?

My face is too close to Dad's butt cushion.

- How do you think the cushion feels?

- We just never know when your super speed might...

Do that.

- We could always put him back in the hole.

- There it is, the Achilles comet.

Its path is unpredictable, but now that it's close to Earth,

we can track it.

- Whoa, whoa, whoa. Hold on.

Is that a new remote?

- I just got it yesterday.

You can program it to run the DVD player or--

- Hank, can you play with your little toy later?

- It's not a toy.

Look how red and spongy the buttons are.

- I know. I just want to push them.

- Hello!

Giant comet speeding past Earth

doing weird things to our powers.

- No comet's gonna mess with my powers.

- Hot stuff. Here we go.

- I can't stop it!

- Hit the deck. - Duck!

- Ah, my foot!

Ah, my remote.

- Whoa, stop it!

- Max, freeze your sister!

- On it!

- Your other sister.

- Oh, right.

- Now thaw 'em out.

- Are you sure?

'Cause we kind of have our dream family.

- Fine.

- Let me guess.

Max said something about his dream family?

So how long is this wonky thing gonna last?

- We have to wait for the comet to pass to Earth.

That's what this clock is.

- Ten years?

- Ten hours.

- Oh.

Ten hours?

- Don't worry, Dad.

I'll keep everything under control at the dance tonight.

- There's a school dance tonight?

I don't think so, sweetie. Sorry.

- But Cole asked me to be his date.

- [gasps] He did?

Oh, that is so exciting.

What are you gonna wear?

- Pajamas, because you're not leaving this house.

- Aw. - Aw.

- But, Dad, I'm totally fine right now.

- It's the twin thing.

You two have to stay near each other.

The last time this happened,

we realized if we kept your cribs within three feet,

your powers didn't go off.

- I'm not buying that.

See? Nothing.

Three feet it is.

- I'm sorry.

I wish there was a way you could go,

but if you can't control your powers,

anything can happen, including being exposed.

- But...

School break starts tomorrow,

and Cole's going on vacation for two whole weeks.

- You know, Hank, if Max goes with Phoebe

and they stay within three feet of each other,

they'll be fine.

- And then I can go with Cole.

[both cheering]

- Yeah, I'm not going to some lame school dance.

Dad, come on. You got to shut this down.

- Actually, it's not a bad idea.

- Why do you hate me?

- The only reason you don't want to go

is because that girl Cortni you've been crushing on

said no when you asked her.

- She did not say no.

- No.

- No? - No.

- A lot of things were said. I can't remember.

The point is, I'm staying here.

Nothing will change my mind.

- Great.

Then you can both hang here with us.

I just got a great new 3-D puzzle of the Titanic;

you two, me, and 5,000 pieces of oceanic history.

- So you're gonna be ready by 7:00?

- We could leave now if you want.

- ♪ Ah, ah, ah, show me a new light ♪

♪ I need a man who's on the same side ♪

♪ To lift me up and show me real life ♪

- You look great tonight, Phoebe.

- Thanks.

- I can't believe we're finally have our first date together.

- Hey, guys. What are we doing next?

- We have to be within three feet of each other,

not three inches.

- Oh, hey, Cole, I think you got the last slider.

Splitsies, right?

I'll have the first half.

Mm.

- Uh, is he gonna be hanging around us all night?

- Uh, yeah.

It's his first dance. He's kind of shy.

- Oh, yeah, you're gonna like that.

- And kind of gross.

- Hi, Max.

You look so handsome tonight.

Want to dance?

- Uh, maybe later, Sarah.

I just ate.

And you know the rule.

You got to wait 20 minutes.

- Right.

I'll see you in 20.

- I'll be here.

All right, we got 20 minutes to get out of here.

- No, you promised you'd stay.

There's rumors about mini tacos later.

- I do like tiny foods.

- Hey, let's get a picture.

We can capture this night forever.

- I may vomit.

- Stop it. Cole's just being sweet.

- No, I think there was something wrong

with that slider.

[shutter clicking]

- Isn't this great?

- Yeah, I'm really glad I asked

you and your brother to the dance.

- Don't worry. We can just crop him out.

- Yeah, just crop me out.

- Or you can just get out.

- Or I'll just get out.

- Huh. Weird.

Would you excuse me for a sec? Thanks.

- Max, you can't get that far away from me.

Did you see what happened to the camera?

Max!

Oh, Cortni's here. - Uh-huh.

- And she brought a friend,

a really good friend.

- But she... But...

But I...

Huh?

- Look, I'm sorry, Max, really.

But I need you to come back with me to Cole now.

Come on. Come on.

- Dance clock's ticking.

Tick-tock, tick-tock, tick-tock.

- You wouldn't happen to be affected by a comet, would you?

- A little glue, and we are back in business.

- This swing is the coolest thing ever!

- We got it when you were a baby to keep you in place.

It's made out of super strong metal alloys

reinforced with interlocking coils for maximum stability.

- And it's super bouncy!

Whee!

Whoo-hoo!

Yeah!

Yeah--

- We also got that when you were a baby.

- Here we are. Nora is laser-proof.

- You look like a bug.

- Mother, will you please take me over

so I can be closer to my dear Billy?

- No, Mom, it's a trap!

- Ow!

- How about we do some yoga together?

You know, your father and I learned

that if we stay calm and relaxed,

it helps keep our powers from going off.

- Eating ice cream helps too.

Of course, the last time the comet was here,

I gained 30 pounds.

- The comet was only here for about ten hours.

- It was the comet. - Okay, Hank.

Calm down. Go back to your puzzle.

- Nora, let's get to that yoga.

Tree pose. There you go.

Nice and relaxing.

Cramp. Cramp!

All right, who wants some ice cream?

- Way ahead of you.

[dance music playing]

♪ ♪

- Can you believe Cortni chose that guy over me?

- You mean she didn't chose the annoying dude

with no sense of personal space?

- Great; now there's a third guy who likes her?

- Hey there, Footloose.

- Not now, screw loose.

- Max, you're too far.

You might want to stay away from the air vents.

- Wait, are you following your brother again?

- No, just going where the music takes me.

- Oh, sorry. Hey, Cortni.

What's up?

- Hi, Max.

- So I thought you didn't want to go to the dance.

- Oh, it's not that.

I just didn't want to go to the dance with you.

- Well, who's that?

- That's Jacob.

He's a senior.

- Yeah, citizen.

- Hey, what do you think you're doing?

- Hey, relax, man. I'm just talking.

- Talk to someone else, freshman.

- Look, Max, you're cute and all.

It's just, I'm with Jacob.

He has a car.

- Yeah, well, you would've loved our walks.

- Why are you still here?

- Relax, bro. I'm just dancing, okay?

- Oh, you call that dancing?

- Uh, as a matter of fact, I do.

- Oh, so you think you're a big shot.

Well, bring it on, freshman.

- Huh. Oh, I'll bring it.

It'll be bringed--branged--brunged--

you know what I mean.

- Well, it seems like your brother's got over his shyness.

Want to get out of here and grab a pizza?

- Hey, Phoebe, you got to stay here!

I'm about to show this Jacob guy up.

- Phoebe, you coming?

I get the feeling you don't want to hang with me.

- No, I do. - Then let's go.

- Look, more than three feet.

- [sighs]

I'm sorry, Cole. I can't.

- That's what I thought.

- But, Cole!

A broken heart?

Oh, come on, comet. Now you're just mocking me.

- I can't believe it's over with Cole.

And it's all your fault.

You knew this night was important to me.

- It's important to me too.

I'm about to have a dance-off with a guy I've never met before

over a girl who wants nothing to do with me.

- Yeah, it'll probably take you minutes to get over this.

- Hey, I've been following you around all night.

It's your turn to follow me.

Now, if you don't mind,

I have to dance.

- I heard you're in a dance-off.

Be careful.

- So I've only seen this in movies.

Who goes first?

Eenie, meenie, miney, mo?

Coin flip? Rock, paper, scissors?

- Stop talking.

[dance music plays]

- ♪ So if you want it ♪

♪ And if you need it ♪

♪ And you won't bring me down ♪

♪ If you believe it ♪

♪ Then you got to shout out ♪

♪ Scream it loud ♪

♪ Tell 'em what it's all about ♪

- Go, Max. Go, Max.

Go, Max. Go, Max...

- Back, Max. Back, Max, back, Max.

- Watch how it's done.

- ♪ What's that sound coming up from the ground ♪

♪ And put my toes to my head ♪

[cheers and applause]

- Wow, he's really good.

I don't know if I can top that.

- Please. You can take him.

Just try something like this.

- ♪ Take a deep breath ♪

♪ What comes next ♪

♪ And from the start to the end ♪

♪ You'll be my best friend ♪

♪ I'm looking all of this up ♪

- Okay, there's no way I'm doing that.

- Fine, just take out the spin, street it up,

and throw in your triple maximus.

- Yeah, my triple maximus.

Wait, how'd you know about my secret move?

- Dr. Colosso has been posting videos of you dancing for weeks.

- 2 million hits.

Take that, stupid talking animals.

[laughing]

Wait a minute.

- Just go dance.

And take him down.

One of us needs to win tonight.

- ♪ Tell us what it's all about ♪

♪ Bring it ♪

♪ Don't wait another minute ♪

♪ You could lose it all ♪

♪ Push it to the limit ♪

♪ Yeah, you got to shout out ♪

♪ Scream it loud ♪

♪ Tell 'em what it's all about ♪

♪ We got to shake the roof off ♪

♪ We got to scream it loud ♪

♪ We'll make you roll, make you rock ♪

♪ We got to shout it out ♪

♪ We got to shout it out ♪

[cheers and applause]

- Wait, you're leaving me?

But I'm a senior. I have a car.

- Then drive yourself home.

You looked really great out there, Max.

- What, so now you want me?

'Cause I showed off my sweet dance moves?

- Isn't that the point of a dance-off?

- Is there ever really a point to a dance-off?

Well, maybe now you'll realize what you missed out on.

- Okay, so what?

Am I supposed to win a dance-off for you?

- Well, since you offered,

oh, Sarah!

- You're going down!

- Oh.

- Man, thanks for those moves back there.

- Yeah, glad somebody's night wasn't a total disaster.

- Oh, right. Cole, my slider buddy.

I'm sorry, phoebes.

Is there anything I can do?

- I doubt it.

Cole hates me.

- He does not hate you.

Trust me, he totally likes you.

- How do you know?

- Because I'm a guy.

And because I was within three feet of you two all night.

Most of the night.

- Well, if Cole still likes me,

then he must've left thinking I don't like him.

I can't let him leave for two weeks thinking that.

I have to fix this.

[loud thud]

We have to fix this.

- Om.

- Ga-boinga-boinga-boinga...

- Ah-ah-ah-ah-ah-ah...

- One last piece.

There she is, the RMS Titanic.

See, kids.

We're staying calm, and our powers are in check.

- Alert, alert.

One hour until Achilles Comet passes.

- One hour. Yes!

- Whoa!

- What's going on?

Uh-oh.

- Ah! My puzzle.

Ah! My remote!

- Oh, Hank, I'm so sorry.

- It's okay. These things happen.

I'm not gonna let a few slip-ups set off my superpowers.

[ice cream truck twinkling]

Ice cream truck.

Ah!

[door bell rings]

Sorry. Just my ringtone.

- Mm-hmm.

- Just a word of warning.

There's a slight chance Cole might've moved on

to a girl with a car.

- I thought you were over Cortni.

- So did I.

- Okay, relax, Phoebe.

You know he likes you, so just tell him how you feel.

- That's lame. Guys don't want to hear that.

- Well, then, what do I say?

- It's so easy. Just say--

- Too late. He's coming.

Hide!

Hi, Cole. - Hey, Phoebe.

What are you doing here?

- I just wanted to tell you before you leave

that I really like you.

And not just, like, like, but, like, like-like.

I mean, you can even say that I like-like-like you.

Wait, that's too many likes.

That sounded weird. Am I still talking?

- Unfortunately.

- What do I do?

- How should I know?

- Oh, not you, Cole. - You're messing it up.

- You're not helping. - What do you need help with?

- Uh, nothing, Cole. I mean...

- I messed up big-time.

- I just--oh, what did you do?

- No, no, to him. Say you messed up big-time.

- Oh, right. I messed up big-time.

- It was an off-night, you know?

- It was an off-night, you know?

- Like in a game when you go up to block a shot

and get called for a foul in the paint.

- Like in a game when you go up to block a shot

and get called for a foul in the paint.

- Know what I'm saying?

- Know what I'm saying?

Do I know what I'm saying?

- I think I know what you're saying.

- It's working. What's next.

- I just want to say one more thing.

- I just want to say one more thing.

- Oh, no. Please go away.

- Please go away.

- What?

- Wait, no, no. Don't go away, Cole.

- You forgot about our dance.

- Uh, but there's no music.

- Let danger be our music.

Hold me! - Ah!

- Is there something in the bushes?

- I don't see anything.

- What is going on?

- Um, where I come from,

we throw pine cones for good luck.

- Okay, okay, I'm back.

Just go for it. Short and sweet.

- Got it.

Cole, I'm sorry about tonight.

I hope we're cool and we can try this again sometime.

- You're losing him.

- That was really nice.

Of course we're cool.

- And that's how you talk to a boy.

- And I promise, when I get back,

we'll have a real date.

- I can't wait.

- Me either.

Thanks for the pine cones.

Good night, Max.

- [chortles]

Night, Cole.

- [squeals]

Thanks for coming tonight.

- We're even.

Now give me a five-minute head start

and defrost that.

- Max, we're not supposed to be apart.

Oops.

He went that way.

- All right, thanks to my advanced puzzle skills

and this super-strength glue,

I have once again fixed the remote.

Now let's see where this comet is.

- Oh, good.

You guys are right in time to see the comet pass.

- There it is.

- Three, two, one!

[all cheering]

- Finally. - Finally.

- Okay, now, now, kids, be careful.

There still might be some after effects from the comet.

- Ow!

- Was that an after effect.

- Yeah, let's go with that.

- Okay, kids, time for bed.

Um, you want to change out of that diaper thing?

- No, not really.

- Well, I'm gonna stay as far away from you as I can.

- If I can hear you, it's not far enough.

- Then what are you still doing here?

- I was gonna watch a movie.

- No, I'm gonna watch a movie.

What the...

- Is this glue?

- No! - No!

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