Original subtitles

- Here is your blanket, father.

- And a pillow for your head, papa.

- Ooh, thank you.

Oh, the remote.

Ugh, I can't reach it.

If only there was someone who cared for me.

- Here you go.

And remember, I love you way more than Phoebe does.

- That's not what it says on this mug I made you.

- Oh!

Phoebe loves me most.

Mugs don't lie, Max.

See, Barb, I told you having kids

would eventually come in handy.

- Totally worth the wait.

Hank, you know they're just buttering you up for money.

- No way! - What's money?

- I know what they're doing, Barb.

Listen, kids, if you want something,

you know you can always come to me.

BOTH: I need money for a new phone!

- Absolutely not. Never come to me again.

- You both have perfectly good phones.

- These are not phones.

All we can do is talk on them.

- The mephone has apps that'll help me

finish my homework quicker, a holographic keyboard.

- A laser pointer for messing with cats.

- [chuckles] Cats are funny.

- And all it costs is $199.

[laughter]

- There's no way both of you are getting $200.

- It's cheaper than those shoes you have on.

- Ah, you save the world,

you can spend as much as you want on shoes.

- Look, you guys are old enough

to pay for your own phones.

- That's so much money!

I mean, it's not that much money.

- Maybe it's time you guys

do what typical, non-supe teenagers do.

- Take money out of your wallet when you're not looking?

- No, get jobs.

And give me my wallet back.

- Come on, dad. I just clipped your toenails.

- And I froze off your plantar's wart.

- Sorry, kids. You got played.

Oh, you have got to see my feet, Barb.

These kids are gifted.

[dramatic music]

- ♪ What you see is not what you get ♪

♪ Livin' our lives with a secret ♪

♪ We fit right in ♪

♪ Bet you never guess ♪

♪ 'cause we're livin' our lives ♪

♪ Just like all the rest ♪

♪ A picture-perfect family ♪

♪ Is what we try to be ♪

♪ Look closer you might see ♪

♪ The crazy things we do ♪

♪ This isn't make believe ♪

♪ It's our reality ♪

♪ Just your average family ♪

♪ Trying to be normal and stay out of trouble ♪

♪ Livin' a double life ♪

- [British accent] Observe the nerd

In her natural habitat.

We can only hope she migrates south

and stays there.

- [British accent] Observe the jealous brother--

[normal voice] Ugh, I don't have time for goofy accents.

I'm going to work.

- [normal voice] Wait, you already got a job?

- Mm-hmm.

Well, I will after my interview at Wong's Pizza Palace.

Which means I'm closer to finding a job than you are.

Unless the couch is hiring.

Max?

Max!

BOTH: Hello, I'd like to apply for the job!

- Wait, you're Mrs. Wong, right?

- No, I just bought this T-shirt

because it matches my face.

Of course I'm Mrs. Wong!

Wait here.

I have two job openings

and three dummies to interview.

- Wait, three?

- You two and bobblehead over there.

- Tyler?

- You guys are applying for jobs together?

All you ever do is argue.

- No, we don't. - Yes, we do.

- No, we don't! Stop it--what are you--

- ugh!

- But don't worry about working together,

'cause there's only room for one of you.

Oh, and just so we're clear.

What I meant was I'm getting the other job.

- Yeah. - Yeah, we got it.

- Well, looks like this job is mine.

I'm better than you at everything,

and Tyler's never getting all this under a hairnet.

- Please, if anyone's getting this job, it's me.

I'm dressed for success,

and you look like you buy your clothes

at the bus station lost and found.

- Easy fix.

Ah.

- Looks a little tight.

- Thanks, I've been working out.

- So, Phoebe, what would make you

a good pizza palace employee?

- I think this 45-minute digital presentation

speaks for itself.

Could you get the lights?

- So you don't have any work experience?

- Why would you assume that?

- Because under "work experience"

you put, "yes, please."

- I have a lot of experience in the canine ambulatory sector.

- Dumb it down, toots.

- I walk dogs.

- The job starts at minimum wage.

You okay with that?

- Interesting offer.

I have a counterproposal.

Bam!

- [laughs]

How would you improve this restaurant?

- Mechanical bull.

- Hmm.

Go on.

Quite frankly, I don't want

to spend time with any of you.

But I need cooks,

so, Phoebe and Tyler, you got it.

- Whoo-hoo! Yes! Thank you so much.

I won't disappoint you.

- Yeah, me neither.

[sneezes]

- You're fired.

Job is yours, mark.

- Max. - You want the job or not?

- Mark it is.

[sobs]

- Are you crying? It's just a job.

- No, it's the jacket. It's just so tight.

- On your mark, get set,

go!

- Done, coach.

- Half a second?

You're slacking, kid.

Do a lap!

- Paris is lovely this time of year.

- Hey, guys.

What are you up to?

- Sport stacking.

You up-stack the cups,

and then you down-stack 'em.

- Is this a game or a chore?

- It's just a game.

We're not playing it for any reason.

- I thought we were gonna win

some sweet, sweet cash in the tournament.

- Remember what I said after I explained the plan?

- Uh, don't tell mom and dad.

- Billy, meet mom and dad.

- Kiss that tournament good-bye.

You can't use your powers to win.

- There goes my pet monkey.

- This looks like fun, Hank.

Let's, uh-- let's give it a shot.

- You're on.

Now I'll warn you, I'm pretty great at everything.

So don't be too hard on yourself.

- On your mark, get set, go.

Done! How'd you do, Hank?

- This game's stupid.

- Right, uh, who wants to race mommy?

- Sorry, but if you think it's cool,

it's probably not anymore.

- You guys are looking at the two newest pizza artists

at Wong's pizza palace.

- Congratulations!

- You both got a job at the same place?

- Yeah, until Max gets fired.

- How do I put this?

You two are like peanut butter and tuna,

great individually,

but together, ugh, not so much.

- Actually, Barb, pb&ts are--

- making a point, Hank.

- We'll be fine, mom.

- Oh, uh, kids, is there--

- yes, dad, there's a family discount.

- That's not what I was gonna say!

But it's what I wanted to hear.

- And this is my prized possession,

the wong-za 4000.

Makes a perfect pizza.

Unlike my four lazy sons.

"ooh, we wanna be doctors."

Ugh, losers.

- Whoa, does this thing make pizzas or scan luggage?

- Yes.

Now pay attention.

- Is there gonna be a quiz?

- Of course.

The first question is: No questions!

Now running a kitchen is like a symphony,

and all my employees must play in perfect harmony.

Let's start with the medium pizza.

First we pound it.

This is important because it opens up the crust

so love can get in.

- That's beautiful.

- By love, I mean expired tomato sauce.

Next, Max spreads the sauce.

Then Phoebe sprinkles on the cheese.

And finally Max puts on the toppings.

Perfect harmony. Got it?

- Yeah, you're not really paying us enough

to memorize things.

- Pound, sauce, cheese, toppings, got it.

- Good.

Now make me a medium pizza

with pepperoni, mushrooms, and black olives.

I'll be right back.

And remember, harmony!

- Wait, what do I do next?

- You do toppings.

You can't just be throwing pepperoni all willy-nilly.

- [Italian accent] Hey, I'Ma trying to make a pizza here!

- Give me that.

- No, Phoebe, give me that.

It's my pizza. I was making--

- what are you doing?

- [Italian accent] Now look at what'a happened?

- Hey, Barb.

- Not doing anything.

- I saw you. You're good.

You should sign up for this tourney

that Billy was gonna do.

It says "all ages."

It is kinda fun!

- That's the spirit.

Haven't seen this look in your eye

since our superhero days.

Ooh, I'll be your coach.

- Okay, thanks, Hank.

- Let's get to work, rookie!

- Now?

- Less talky, more stacky.

- Okay, I was just gonna make us some lunch.

- Ooh, PB&Ts?

I cannot stop thinking about those.

- Clearly we can't work together,

but with me here and you there,

this is working out great.

- Well, at least this way

no one's gonna be dropping pizzas.

[loud crash]

But they will be dropping plates.

- What is this cart doing here?

- I moved a few things so that Max and I could work separately.

- Separately?

That makes for bad pizza harmony.

Where is my chopping block?

- Uh, right here.

- Good.

Now I can put your head on it.

- Don't. Don't worry, Mrs. Wong.

Unlike Phoebe's bad idea, I had a good one.

- Ugh. - Where's the manager?

- Promise me you didn't do something stupid.

- I don't make promises, Phoebe.

I make pizzas.

- Is there a problem sir?

- I found this fortune in the crust.

- "Some stuff will happen."

that's your great idea, lame fortunes in pizzas?

- To be fair, those things are harder to write than you think.

- Well, here's your fortune. You're fired!

- Looks like only one of us is getting a new phone.

- Ring, ring.

Pick up, it's for you.

- Hello.

- You're fired too!

- Oh!

I knew I shouldn't have answered it.

- Wait, miss Wong, please don't fire us.

- Too late! Have a nice life!

- But you already trained us.

It'll take a whole day to find someone new and train them.

- Phoebe's right. We're already here.

And we're super afraid of you now.

- Hmm, I do like fear.

Okay, one more chance.

But you have to do it my way, together.

Harmony!

How many times do I have to yell it?

Ow!

Ugh!

- I think she's warming up to us.

- Look at all these people.

Every one of them a potential loser.

- All right, Billy, we need to ditch them

before they start their synchronized squat thrusting.

- Too late.

- Which of you two is stacking?

- Oh, that would be me.

- Aren't you kind of old for everything?

- Oh, aren't you cute?

What's your name, sweetie?

- If you wanna know my name so bad,

check last year's trophy.

- It's Avery. Her name's Avery, Barb.

- Hey, is that your mom going up against my brother?

I'll be my allowance she's gonna lose.

- Oh, really?

Then show me the green, prep school.

[horn sounds]

- Whoo!

I just won my first round!

- Ooh, yeah!

What are you gonna do

when Barb stacks cups on you?

- Ah!

- Cough it up.

- I'd do what she says.

Don't let the flower fool you.

- All right, we have to work together to get this baby.

Remember, there's no "me" in mephone.

Well, okay, there is, but you know what I mean.

- You quit yammering, I'll get to hammering.

- Don't do that.

We can't get caught using superpowers.

If we find a way to work in harmony,

then we don't need our powers to be super.

- Wow, and I thought these pizzas were cheesy.

- Bump it, Max.

Bump it.

Great, start 'er up.

- Pound.

- Sauce.

- Cheese.

- And toppings.

Yes!

♪ Pizza ♪

- ♪ Pizza ♪

- ♪ No, this is my note, not yours ♪

- ♪ No, you're supposed to be down here ♪

- ♪ No, I'm here, you're supposed to be here ♪

♪ Would you stop arguing with me all the time ♪

- ♪ You're the one who started it ♪

- ♪ No, I wasn't ♪

[phone rings]

- Wong's pizza palace, no order's too big.

150 pizzas?

That order's way too big.

- Hold please.

- Max, I don't know what you're up to,

but we should wait for miss Wong

to get back from her deliveries.

- Phoebe, if we take this order,

we can make all our phone money in one shot.

And it's so long, Wong.

- The cooks don't get the money, Max.

- These cooks will.

Hello, this is Max, the manager.

Oh, and we can do 150 pizzas.

We just need to tack on our P.A.F.,

pizza artist fee.

Yeah, $400.

Seriously, you'll pay it?

I mean, uh, great.

See you in 30 minutes.

- You are totally getting us fired.

- Oh, come on, Phoebe. We're team Thunderman.

We'll turn this wong-za up and crank these pizzas out.

Bump it, Phoebe.

Bump it.

Oh, yeah!

[whistle blows] - Yes!

- You're in the finals, Barb.

- I can't believe this.

Thank you so much for pushing me to do this.

I'm having so much fun.

- So are we. We're totally cleaning up.

- The tables over there,

'cause Billy made a mess.

- A mess of money.

- Just stop talking!

- Here comes Avery.

Just be cool. Be cool, Barb.

What up, a-dog?

- Hi, Avery.

Looks like we're in the finals.

- I'm in the finals. You're in my way.

- Let me at her.

- Okay, now hold on, Hank.

Avery, I am in the finals for a reason.

You're looking at the knick-knack stack attack.

- Oh, careful of that hip.

- Okay, I don't think I like her very much.

- Listen, Barb, you're a superhero.

You've saved the world from the worst villains out there.

You just think of her as a smaller version of them.

- You know, you're right, Hank.

- Of course I am. Squash her like a bug.

- You're right about me being a superhero,

and superheroes help people.

And I'm gonna help that little girl

be the best that she can be.

- Hey, grandma, cup up.

- That's it, she's going down!

- Go, Barb!

Make the streets run salty with her tears!

Too much? I'll take it down a notch.

[horn sounds]

- Boo-yah!

Two-time champ!

Whoo-hoo!

- Well, I gave it my best. Right, Hank?

Hank?

- Hank Thunderman.

Hey, a-dog, with my coaching,

I think we could really take this--

okay.

- All right, just heightened the torque,

so should make it faster.

Start it up.

150 pizzas. Let's do it.

- All right, here they come.

- Pound.

- Sauce.

- Cheese.

- Toppings.

Ah-ha, we're doing it.

- See, I told you we'd be fine.

- Did this thing just speed up?

- We're in the pizza zone, Phoebe.

Ride the wave.

- I'm trying.

- Okay, here we go. I got it.

Oh, gosh.

- Ahh! It's too fast, Max.

Slow it down!

- It won't stop.

- Ahh!

Ah!

There's too many! Don't let them hit the floor.

- Okay.

- Ahh!

- Ahh!

- No! Aghh!

I've got an idea!

That should hold it.

- Good thinking.

[alarm sounds]

[rumbling]

- Oh, no.

[Italian accent] It'sa gonna blow!

- I'm back.

[loud rumbling]

Uh-oh.

[loud bang]

Phoebe, Max, where are you?

- Right here, Mrs. Wong.

- Oh, there you are.

You're fired!

- I have a counterproposal.

- Get out!

- Fair enough!

- Well, we got fired twice.

- Blew up a kitchen.

- And covered an angry woman in dough.

- Guess you could say we make a pretty good team.

- I know.

These phones are cray-cray.

Am I right?

- Totes.

It sounds like you're right next to me.

- How did you guys get new mephones?

- Hold on.

Do you mind? I'm on a call.

- Where'd you guys get the money for those?

Mom and dad give it to you?

- Uh, sorta.

- Are we really gonna bet all this money on mom?

- No way. Avery's gonna cream her.

- Good. We're on the same page.

- We're letting it ride on the little girl!

- Who's got action?

[overlapping shouting]

- Wait, you guys won those betting on sport stacking?

I'm not sure mom and dad would approve.

- I think we'll just hold on to these for you.

- You know, so mom and dad don't find out.

- If we can't have them...

Then no one can.

- Come on, Nora. Let's go monkey shopping.

Repair and Synchronization by Easy Subtitles Synchronizer 1.0.0.0