Original subtitles

- And...smile!

- Wait! Say something funny.

- I have a masters degree in fine arts,

and I take yearbook pictures for a living.

- [hysterical laughter]

I don't get it.

- Next!

- Hi, Phoebs!

You look totes fabs, ubes adorbs!

- Aw, thanks.

Is that good?

- Yeah.

- I'm actually really excited.

At my old school, our pictures were always a little...

formal.

- You had to wear a uniform?

- Something like that.

All I know is school pictures are forever,

and I want this one to be perfect.

- Perfect, huh?

You might wanna change...

into someone pretty.

- Nyaah! - Nyaah!

- Nyaah!

That's what you're wearing for picture day?

- I always wear what I want.

- Next. - Ooh!

- Besides, Phoebe, no one's gonna be looking at me.

- Why not?

- 'cause. They'll be looking at you.

- Huh?

Chocolate, Max?

- Next.

- What-- No, no, no!

You have to let me take it again.

That can't be my school picture.

- Fine. - [sighs]

- Smile.

- Wait, what? Now?

- Don't forget to say "Cheese."

- Cheese.

- Next.

[upbeat music]

- ♪ What you see is not what you get ♪

♪ living our lives with a secret ♪

♪ we fit right in, bet you'd never guess ♪

♪ 'cause we're living our lives just like all the rest ♪

♪ a picture perfect family is what we try to be ♪

♪ look closer, you might see ♪

♪ the crazy things we do ♪

♪ this isn't make believe, it's our reality ♪

♪ just your average family ♪

♪ trying to be normal and stay out of trouble ♪

♪ living a double life ♪

- I can't believe Max pranked me at our new school.

Did you get all the cheese out?

- Yep, got all the cheese out.

- What about the chocolate?

- Yep, got all the cheese out.

- I thought Max's back to school pranks

would've stopped when we moved here.

- Well, if it's any consolation,

your hair is really silky right now.

And your brother is in a lot of trouble.

- You're darn right he is. And he knows it, too.

That's why he's late. He's scared of me.

Max! - Not now, Hank-O.

- Yeah, he's petrified.

Check it out, pheebs.

The internet gave you a nickname.

"Fondue-Doo-Head." [laughing]

- Max, why would you dump chocolate and Cheese

all over your sister on picture day?

- Well, I was going to use chili but it's 12 bucks a gallon.

- Well, that does seem high. - Dad!

- What is the big deal?

It's not like I exposed my superpowers to anybody.

- but you're still in a lot of trouble.

Why would you do something like this?

- Because mischief and mayhem are what us supervillains do.

- [scoffs]

when we moved to hiddenville to have a normal life,

we were hoping this ridiculous supervillain phase of yours

was just going to end.

- Never!

One day, the league of master villains is gonna call, okay,

and I'll be there to pick up the phone

and say, "Hello, this is Max and I'm not going through a phase."

- Not if you don't have a phone.

- Dad!

- No. Two weeks, no phone,

and you apologize to your sister.

- [clears throat] fine.

I'm sorry.

Fondue-Doo-Head.

- Oh, that's it.

- Phoebe, put your brother down.

- Okay.

Max, your ears are too big for your head.

- Mehhh! - Mehhh!

- [clears throat]

- [sighs] all right.

- Ugh.

- Thank you.

Now, if you'll excuse me,

I'm suddenly in the mood for chili.

- Two weeks, no phone? That'll teach you.

- Please, I have phones planted everywhere.

- I'm so done with your pranks, Max.

You know what you need? A taste of your own medicine.

- What? You're gonna prank me?

Phoebe, you need a little dark side in you

to do that.

- I got plenty of dark side.

Who do you think puts the empty jar of peanut butter

back on the shelf? This gal!

- No, I do that.

- Well, stop it, that drives me crazy.

- Well, then mission accomplished.

Oh, come on, dad, that was my last phone.

- [laughing]

- [clicks Tongue]

- Hey, that's my pudding cup! You already had one.

- Sorry, but today feels like a two-cupper.

- Enjoy your pudding lava.

- Oh, that's hot!

- Instead of fighting,

can one of you take out the trash?

- It's Billy's turn.

- I did it last time.

- Well, I'm not doing it! - I'm double not doing it!

- I'm triple not doing it!

- I'm whatever's after triple not doing it!

- Hey!

Stop arguing and take out the trash!

- Hank, there's no reason to yell.

- We have four kids.

There's always a reason to yell.

- I know, but I'm reading this new Parenting book--

- Uh-Oh, another self-Help book?

The last time you read one of those,

we were vegans for a month.

- 30 days of broccoli.

- We won't go back! - Okay.

This one's different.

From conflict to non-Flict.

It says to let children solve their own problems.

- You've got to stop parenting from a book, Barb.

You need to open your mouth and let loud words fly out.

- Trust me, Hank, I got this.

All right, here's the deal, kids.

Whoever throws something away

that causes the trash to topple over

has to take the trash out.

- So we get to pile up the trash?

- As high as we want?

- And whichever fool knocks it over has to take it out?

Both: Cool!

- All right, Mr. Supervillain,

you think pranks are so much fun,

let's see if you like wiping out on your greasy slide.

Oh, hey, Nora, I was just--

- Greasing Max's slide? I'm in.

- Billy in the hole!

- Billy, no!

- Whooaaahh!

Waaahhhhh!

Whoa.

Billy in the wall.

- What happened to knocking?

I was about to get in the shower.

- Billy!

You ruined my dark mayhem poster.

- Thanks, I'm fine.

- Billy!

That prank was meant for maaaaa...

...gic shows are fun.

I think I'll go see one now.

- This was your big prank, Phoebe?

Turning our little brother into a torpedo?

- It was supposed to be you.

I would never endanger our siblings.

- Whoooaaahhh!

Hey, guys.

What'd I miss?

- Lame, Phoebe. Lame.

- [scoffs]

Just you wait!

I am going to come up with the best prank ever,

even if it takes me all night!

- Morning, Sunshine. So I gave you all night.

Did you come up with that best prank ever yet?

'cause I did.

[bell ringing]

- Oh, I am so getting you back for this.

- Sorry, I don't speak morning breath.

- I think you're going to be late for biology.

- [exhales] Ready to save the day, Electress?

- You know it, Thunder Man.

- Hi-Yah! Take that!

- Ki-Ya! - foot to your ninja face!

- Ki-Ya!

- A thousand daggers of pain!

Hi-Yah, Phoebe. - Hi, sweetie.

- is this what you do when we're not home?

- We will ask the questions here, Missy.

Why aren't you at school? - Yeah.

Nice save.

- Because Max pranked me again.

And I'm really, really mad.

And so is Mr. Grumbles.

- Sounds like it's time I drop the thunder on that boy.

- No, hang on, Hank.

According to chapter six of my book,

"Letting your teenagers work their issues out on their own,"

you should let your teenagers work their issues out

on their own.

- What's chapter seven called,

"You wasted 22.95 on this book, sucka"?

- Phoebe, I think you should respond

however you think is necessary.

- Good, then I'm going to take

this pranks thing to the next level

and really hit Max where it hurts!

- Well, no. Hol--

- Thanks, mom!

- [frantic yelling] boom!

- No fair. I wasn't ready.

- I know, that's why I started.

What's your book say about that, sucka?

[grunts]

[standoff music]

- Go ahead. Throw yours away first.

- You go first.

- You're closer. You go.

- Fine.

- Mess up! Mess up! Mess up!

- Not cool.

- Only one rule in trash wars.

Win.

Also, recycle.

- ♪ She'll be coming 'round the mountain ♪

♪ when she comes, when she comes ♪

♪ she'll be coming 'round the mountain when she... ♪

ahhh!

You startled me.

- What are you doing?

- Taking a shower.

You think this lustrous, shiny fur just happens?

- Poor Phoebe.

Waking up in school in front of all those kids.

I feel bad for her.

[laughter]

- [evil voice] Max thunderman.

This is dark mayhem of the league of master villains.

- Yeah, right. Nice prank, Phoebe.

- This is not a prank, and I am not Phoebe!

Do you think your sister is capable

of hacking your computer?

- Nora, maybe. But Phoebe, definitely not.

Wow! Dark mayhem. You're so cool.

If I could be any supervillain when I grow up, I--

I'd wanna be you.

- If your dark side is half as good

as your Butt kissing, you're well on your way.

You have real supervillain potential.

- Oh, my gosh, that's so cool! I always knew it!

I mean, thanks, man.

- Smooooth.

- So, what's first?

Do we jump right into world domination

or start with a meet and greet breakfast?

Or brunch? It depends on your schedule.

- Silence!

Before you are accepted into the league of master villains,

we need you to pass a test,

one that will prove you will do anything we tell you.

Anything. No questions asked.

- So when do we start?

- that was a question!

- Sorry, sorry, sir.

- Now, listen carefully.

- You can do this, Max. You can do this.

[phone ringing]

- Max Thunderman.

Did you follow my orders?

- Yes, sir.

League of master villains, here I come.

- Congratulations, Max. You are now officially...

- Pranked!

- Phoebe?

- Aloha, girlfriend.

- Nice try.

Too bad everyone's still in class, ha.

- Are they?

[bell ringing]

- [laughing nervously]

How you doing?

What's up?

Mahalo.

- Oh, come on, Cherry.

I wouldn't call it the best prank ever.

No, you're right, it was awesome!

Okay, talk to you later. Bye.

What are you doing with my stuff?

- What are you still doing here?

I thought you'd be halfway to mexico by now.

- Why? - Max is coming for you...

as soon as he figures out how to get that bra off.

- Please, I think Max Has learned his lesson.

- Have you met the guy?

[alarm blaring]

Female computer voice: Alert. Alert.

Non-Supe approaching.

- I'll get that.

- I'll get it.

I'm expecting some deliveries.

- Got a delivery for Max thunderman.

- That's me.

And hopefully I ordered some of those fancy shorts, too.

- Yeah, that's always funny.

1,000 live crickets, six sledgehammers,

three gallons of itching powder,

and one barrel of radioactive waste.

Sign here.

- You can still make that last bus to Tijuana.

[jazzy music]

♪ ♪

- So, Barb, you want to admit you failed

before the seagulls show up?

- Stop exaggerating, Hank.

[seagulls cawing]

I still stand by my book.

- Knock, knock, who's there?

Not the man taking out the trash.

Bam!

- How many girls does it take to knock over the trash?

None! Bam!

- Aww, your book is helping us raise trash talkers.

Literally trash talkers.

Literally.

- Oh, okay, Hank. I get it.

- All right, Max, I can't take it anymore.

It's over.

Let's just call a truce and walk away.

Deal?

[buzzing] ow!

- It's not over until I say it's over.

And believe me, it's not over.

- Yeah, well, I'm not gonna give you the satisfaction.

If you won't end your pranks, then I will.

Oh, are these all your little prank Buttons?

- Phoebe, just step away from my desk, all right?

- Ohhh, am I getting warmer?

[gasps] what's this big red button?

This looks important.

- Do not press that.

- So you don't want me to press the big red button?

Okay.

Oops.

- You just pushed the self-destruct button!

- Yeah, right.

Male computer voice: You just pushed

the self-destruct button.

Lair will self-destruct in ten minutes.

- Ooh, fancy light show and talking computer.

Someone spent their whole allowance on a prank.

- No, Phoebe, my prank was not pranking you

and just watching you break down.

Which was really fun until now!

- Oh, please!

If this place were really self-destructing,

Dr. Colosso would be freaking out.

- I'm freaking out! Ahhhh!

Aghhhh!

- [humming]

Mm. [sniffs]

what's that smell?

[sniffs] No.

[sniffs] No.

[sniffs] No.

[sniffs] still No.

Ahh! BOTH: Shh!

- [whispering] We need to talk quietly

or we might cause a trash-alanche.

- [whispering] so what's the plan?

- [whispering] I think we should slowly back away...

and then move to a new house.

- That's it. Stupid book.

- Barb, we're trying to keep quiet...

and then we're going to move to a new house.

- [whispering] okay, I got it.

Both: Trash-Alanche!

- Barb, look out!

Uh-Oh.

Why are there diapers in here?

We don't even have babies.

- glad you're okay, Dad.

- and we definitely learned our lesson.

- See ya.

- No, no! Get back here and clean this mess up!

Yeah, it feels good to yell.

- Your powers are useless, Phoebe.

The only chance we have is if I can override the system.

- Lair will self-destruct in five minutes.

I hope your affairs are in order.

- Ooh, uh, maybe this button will help us.

- Shortcut activated.

Lair will self-destruct in 90 seconds.

- Quit touching stuff, handsy.

- if you had just stopped pranking me,

none of this would've happened.

Is this supervillain thing really worth it?

- Absolutely!

We get cool costumes, awesome hideouts, and goatees.

It's a lot of fun.

- Total annihilation in 60 seconds.

- Okay, maybe not.

- Then why, Max?

Why all this supervillain stuff?

You're in a family of superheroes.

- Exactly.

How else am I going to stand out?

Look at you, you've always been so great at being good.

Everyone thinks you're going to be, like,

one of the best superheroes ever one day.

- Really?

- No gloating. We're on me now.

So what were my choices, huh?

Be second best at being good, or be the best at being bad.

And I wanna be the best.

So if you think about it, this is all your fault.

- Well, I'm glad you shared that with me.

Too bad it had to happen

30 seconds before we're blown to bits!

- Goodbye, my Max. I've always loved you!

- There must be something in all this prank stuff

you had ordered that can help us.

- Complete obliteration in 20 seconds.

- Forget it, Phoebe. We're done.

Game over, history, toast, kicked the bucket, kaput,

bought the farm, roll the credits, it's over!

- It's not over till I say it's over.

- Self-Destruct in five, four, three,

twooooo... [computer shutting down]

[cheers and applause]

- Now it's over.

So about that truce? We good?

- Yes, ma'am.

- Good.

- How about that "I love you" prank of mine, huh?

Funny stuff we're never going to talk about, right?

- Thanks to Billy,

you have Belgian waffles from Belgium...

- Fresh Maple syrup from Vermont...

- And hot coffee from...

over there.

- if you think this makes up

for being buried by a wall of trash, you got--

Ooh, is that churned butter?

- I told you he was a sucker for butter.

- I got the idea for an apology breakfast

from my new book, "Tips for a happy hubby."

- Another self-help book? - Mm-hmm.

- Can I see that?

Anyone for a tall glass of stupid words?

- Morning, everybody. All: Morning!

- Are you guys done pranking yet?

- Yep. That stuff is completely behind us.

- I wouldn't say "Completely."

Completely behind us.

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