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1
00:00:00,440 --> 00:00:03,279
It seemed like slow motion.
I had time to answer questions.
2
00:00:03,280 --> 00:00:05,279
You looked the most relaxed I've seen.
3
00:00:05,280 --> 00:00:07,039
Yeah, and did you see it when he...
4
00:00:07,040 --> 00:00:09,639
Olly, did you see him
when I said your thing about,
5
00:00:09,640 --> 00:00:12,640
in the opposition's case,
home is where the heartlessness is?
6
00:00:13,000 --> 00:00:15,239
- Yeah.
- He looked almost hurt, I loved it.
7
00:00:15,240 --> 00:00:18,240
- He didn't even get it.
- No, he got it, he flinched, he was hating it.
8
00:00:18,800 --> 00:00:21,319
- He was fiddling with his catheter.
- Yeah.
9
00:00:21,320 --> 00:00:23,919
It was a very satisfactory report stage debate.
10
00:00:23,920 --> 00:00:26,920
- Only three amendments in the committee.
- How many did Doug's piece ofshit get?
11
00:00:28,080 --> 00:00:30,439
(Terri) Oh, God, at least 200 or something.
12
00:00:30,440 --> 00:00:33,440
He got fist-fucked in the Lords.
It was more amendment than ill.
13
00:00:33,800 --> 00:00:36,479
- (Terri) Did you say we'd do a press release?
- Yes.
14
00:00:36,480 --> 00:00:39,239
''"ollowing a successful report stage debate,
15
00:00:39,240 --> 00:00:42,240
''Secretary ofState for Social Affairs,
Hugh Abbot, today announced,
16
00:00:43,960 --> 00:00:45,999
'''I'm the fucking daddy'.''
17
00:00:46,000 --> 00:00:47,599
(Laughter)
18
00:00:47,600 --> 00:00:50,600
There was a smarmy piece in the Guardian,
though, did you see it?
19
00:00:51,080 --> 00:00:54,080
Dan fucking Miller. ''Oh, all the work I've done
on the Standing Committee...''
20
00:00:55,080 --> 00:00:58,080
Yeah, he's... My pie is extremely large,
you may have noticed.
21
00:00:58,520 --> 00:01:01,159
- (Terri) He's brilliant.
- Pie for all my friends.
22
00:01:01,160 --> 00:01:04,160
Yeah, my Jacuzzi is king-sized, and everybody
can park their arses on the bubble jets.
23
00:01:08,040 --> 00:01:09,799
(Terri) Was that from something?
24
00:01:09,800 --> 00:01:12,800
Dan Miller is a junior minister and he's not
done at all badly, he's just a bit green.
25
00:01:14,280 --> 00:01:17,280
You're turning a bit green
yourselfthere, Minister.
26
00:01:18,840 --> 00:01:21,799
What are you saying?
Are you saying I'm jealous ofDan...
27
00:01:21,800 --> 00:01:24,800
- No, it's just a little...
- Do you know the invisible line?
28
00:01:25,480 --> 00:01:27,719
- You just stepped over it.
Yeah, yeah.
29
00:01:27,720 --> 00:01:30,720
- That's the problem with it being invisible.
- Again...
30
00:01:31,080 --> 00:01:34,080
- I have just been invited to a...
- (Knock at door)
31
00:01:34,840 --> 00:01:37,119
(Glenn) Just a moment...
(Olly) Danny boy!
32
00:01:37,120 --> 00:01:39,439
(Terri) How lovely.
(Olly) Man ofthe hour.
33
00:01:39,440 --> 00:01:42,440
- I've been...
- That is gorgeous. Shake your little hand.
34
00:01:42,920 --> 00:01:45,119
- Lovely to see you.
- Mm!
35
00:01:45,120 --> 00:01:47,599
- Well done, you did so bloody well.
- Thank you.
36
00:01:47,600 --> 00:01:49,839
- You're looking well.
- It was fantastic.
37
00:01:49,840 --> 00:01:52,439
Could you do GMTV for me tomorrow?
38
00:01:52,440 --> 00:01:54,719
- I would love to do GMTV for you.
- Great.
39
00:01:54,720 --> 00:01:56,159
- Dan...
- Thank you.
40
00:01:56,160 --> 00:01:57,999
- Nice and early.
- I don't mind.
41
00:01:58,000 --> 00:02:00,959
- Thanks, that's fantastic.
- How you feeling, good?
42
00:02:00,960 --> 00:02:03,960
Well the debate did go very, very well
and the ill is going through, so...
43
00:02:05,160 --> 00:02:08,160
- Um, I've got some stuffI need to...
- "ine, fine. Carry on.
44
00:02:08,560 --> 00:02:10,959
- I have been invited...
- How are you, Glenn?
45
00:02:10,960 --> 00:02:13,960
Good, thank you. Actually, you were very
heavy-handed with the backbenchers.
46
00:02:15,000 --> 00:02:18,000
- There's no need for it in this day and age.
- Listen, Glenn.
47
00:02:18,080 --> 00:02:21,080
You know as well as I do,
ifyou're going to make an omelette,
48
00:02:21,160 --> 00:02:24,160
you're going to have to have some
frank and honest discussion with the eggs.
49
00:02:25,280 --> 00:02:28,280
- And that's all I was doing.
- (Phone)
50
00:02:29,480 --> 00:02:32,480
- Hello Malcolm.
- (Loudly Dan. How y lou doing.?
51
00:02:32,520 --> 00:02:34,279
(Dan) How y are lou, lou terrier.?
52
00:02:34,280 --> 00:02:36,479
Listen, I'm just calling because, erm...
53
00:02:36,480 --> 00:02:39,480
You're gathering
a lot of veryinfluential admirers.
54
00:02:39,600 --> 00:02:41,039
Oh, am I really?
55
00:02:41,040 --> 00:02:43,999
You're irresistible,
you know that, don't you? You are.
56
00:02:44,000 --> 00:02:46,719
I have a sort offeeling you're pulling my pisser.
57
00:02:46,720 --> 00:02:49,720
I wouldn't pull your pisser, pal,
I know where it's fucking been.
58
00:02:50,120 --> 00:02:51,159
(Dan laughs)
59
00:02:51,160 --> 00:02:54,160
oh, hang on, listen I've got to go,
I've got Tom on the otherline.
60
00:02:54,760 --> 00:02:57,760
OK, but, er, we'll talk soon.
Thanks for the DVDs, by the way.
61
00:02:58,400 --> 00:03:01,400
Oh, hey, listen, Malcolm,
before you go, can you...
62
00:03:02,120 --> 00:03:04,599
Did you get bumped
for someone more important?
63
00:03:04,600 --> 00:03:06,799
- He's always doing that.
- I've got to go.
64
00:03:06,800 --> 00:03:09,800
- I've got squash with Pete from the Treasury.
- (All) Ooh!
65
00:03:10,080 --> 00:03:13,080
- Pete from the Treasury?
- He cut us a fair bit ofslack,
66
00:03:13,400 --> 00:03:16,239
- so I offered a game to smooth things over.
- Good luck.
67
00:03:16,240 --> 00:03:18,439
- I've got an appointment myself.
- Cool.
68
00:03:18,440 --> 00:03:21,440
Yes, it's just supper with the prime minister.
Just the two ofus, it should be fun.
69
00:03:23,840 --> 00:03:26,840
- Oh, that's very impressive.
- No it isn't, it's just what we do, it's normal.
70
00:03:30,440 --> 00:03:32,079
Well, enjoy that, anyway, so...
71
00:03:32,080 --> 00:03:35,080
- Can you phone me about GMTV later?
- (Terri) Yes. See you. Well done.
72
00:03:35,840 --> 00:03:37,959
- Thanks. Thank you.
- Well done.
73
00:03:37,960 --> 00:03:40,439
- Well done you, well done everyone.
- ye-bye.
74
00:03:40,440 --> 00:03:41,919
(Terri) "antastic.
75
00:03:41,920 --> 00:03:44,119
I'm not complacent, Tom.
76
00:03:44,120 --> 00:03:47,120
Yeah I know we did take a hit over
the focus group thing, but it wasn't a big hit.
77
00:03:49,760 --> 00:03:52,639
Oh, yeah? Says who?
78
00:03:52,640 --> 00:03:55,119
Oh the prime minister told you that, huh?
79
00:03:55,120 --> 00:03:57,039
Well, get you.
80
00:03:57,040 --> 00:04:00,040
Look I can only cook with what I've been
given.
81
00:04:00,080 --> 00:04:02,119
You know, it's like Ready Steady Cook.
82
00:04:02,120 --> 00:04:04,999
You give me Hugh Abbot,
I'll give you bangers and mash.
83
00:04:05,000 --> 00:04:07,639
ut ifyou give me Gerry from the Home Office,
84
00:04:07,640 --> 00:04:10,640
well, then I can raise it to fucking risotto
and scallops, do you know what I mean?
85
00:04:11,880 --> 00:04:14,880
Yeah, yeah, OK, OK, bye.
86
00:04:15,280 --> 00:04:17,439
Sam?
87
00:04:17,440 --> 00:04:20,440
Can you get me Terri Coverley
and Glenn Cullen,
88
00:04:21,040 --> 00:04:23,679
make them an appointment to come over?
89
00:04:23,680 --> 00:04:26,680
I think I've got to shout at some people now.
90
00:04:26,760 --> 00:04:29,760
Oh, actually, get me John at Culture on the
phone. Think I'll have a bit ofa shout now.
91
00:04:35,080 --> 00:04:37,599
- Is this tie all right?
- It's fine.
92
00:04:37,600 --> 00:04:40,600
- I don't want to come across as some sort of...
- Sales rep.
93
00:04:40,640 --> 00:04:43,640
- What, do I look like a bloody sales rep?
- No, no, no, no, it's fine.
94
00:04:46,400 --> 00:04:49,400
What are those?
They're little hippos, aren't they?
95
00:04:49,880 --> 00:04:52,880
I don't know what they are, actually, I think
they're unidentified amusing creatures.
96
00:04:55,000 --> 00:04:58,000
I hate this, being called in for a bollocking from
Tucker, just cause he's been twatted by the PM.
97
00:05:01,080 --> 00:05:04,080
All he'll do is spread us all over the office a bit
and then we'll be off.
98
00:05:04,680 --> 00:05:07,639
Yes, and we've got every reason
to be very happy bunnies.
99
00:05:07,640 --> 00:05:10,640
Day three ofthe report stage
and it's all gone like a dream.
100
00:05:11,000 --> 00:05:14,000
A good dream, not one ofthose ones
where you can't move your legs.
101
00:05:14,360 --> 00:05:17,360
- Absolutely. Now...
- Are you sure about this tie?
102
00:05:18,440 --> 00:05:19,919
It's good, it's funny.
103
00:05:19,920 --> 00:05:21,959
- "unny? "ucking hell.
- Terri...
104
00:05:21,960 --> 00:05:24,199
- This is political breakthrough.
- No...
105
00:05:24,200 --> 00:05:27,200
- I don't want laughs offmy clothes.
- Not funny ha ha...
106
00:05:27,240 --> 00:05:30,240
- Maybe I should go without the tie.
- It's not a laugh, it's fine.
107
00:05:30,680 --> 00:05:33,680
"uck yes, wish me luck,
I'm going to go without the tie.
108
00:05:35,520 --> 00:05:37,319
- Right.
- I meant to ask you,
109
00:05:37,320 --> 00:05:39,239
did you stay in the flat last night?
110
00:05:39,240 --> 00:05:42,240
Yeah, for about a minute and a half.
Kate rang and Alicia had an ear infection.
111
00:05:43,360 --> 00:05:46,360
It's obviously a life and death situation,
an infected ear. Huge crisis.
112
00:05:47,680 --> 00:05:49,719
Hold the front page, shuttle disaster.
113
00:05:49,720 --> 00:05:52,720
So I had to drive 20 miles through the night, so
that I could be ten feet away from Alicia's ear,
114
00:05:54,920 --> 00:05:57,279
which, it turns out, wasn't infected anyway.
115
00:05:57,280 --> 00:06:00,079
And Malcolm's been on at me about the flat,
116
00:06:00,080 --> 00:06:03,080
he thinks there could be some problems
with the Housing ill.
117
00:06:03,280 --> 00:06:06,280
You having a flat in Notting Hill
and living within commuting distance?
118
00:06:07,000 --> 00:06:10,000
It is empty quite a lot ofthe time,
and with the key worker stuff...
119
00:06:10,400 --> 00:06:13,400
ut, I mean, I need...
I need to have a place in London.
120
00:06:14,040 --> 00:06:17,040
Everybody else important has got
a huge fuck-offgrace and favour pad.
121
00:06:17,760 --> 00:06:20,159
Why haven't I got one?
122
00:06:20,160 --> 00:06:23,119
I think I can sort this out for you
ifyou leave it to me.
123
00:06:23,120 --> 00:06:24,999
You know, we do what we said, yes?
124
00:06:25,000 --> 00:06:27,839
- The sale, but not a sale.
- Yeah, right, whatever.
125
00:06:27,840 --> 00:06:30,679
Well, er, I'll see you later then,
we're offthis way.
126
00:06:30,680 --> 00:06:32,639
- OK.
- Enjoy your supper.
127
00:06:32,640 --> 00:06:35,640
- Enjoy your bollocking.
- (Laughs)
128
00:06:36,840 --> 00:06:38,999
"or God's sake, I'm not going to kiss him.
129
00:06:39,000 --> 00:06:42,000
- Evening, Minister, ifyou'd step this way.
- Thank you.
130
00:06:43,040 --> 00:06:46,040
Excuses, excuses,
take your failure like a man, Olly.
131
00:06:46,400 --> 00:06:49,400
All right, but next time I want a rematch
and I'm going to take you down, motherfucker.
132
00:06:50,840 --> 00:06:53,359
- I'm gonna take you down.
- Where are you from?
133
00:06:53,360 --> 00:06:56,360
Lincolnshire, with all the windmills
and the potatoes and the shit.
134
00:06:56,920 --> 00:06:58,919
(Glenn) Are they...
(Hugh) An item?
135
00:06:58,920 --> 00:07:00,999
You need me to suck up to you, as a politician.
136
00:07:01,000 --> 00:07:04,000
He's made a pretty good job of, erm...made
a pretty good job ofshagging Angela Heaney.
137
00:07:06,040 --> 00:07:09,040
- He could be bi.
- A lot ofthem are, you know.
138
00:07:09,280 --> 00:07:12,280
It's just interesting,
seeing the dynamics play within the staff.
139
00:07:15,080 --> 00:07:17,599
- There we are, look.
- He's a cheeky...
140
00:07:17,600 --> 00:07:19,359
- (Hugh) He's seen us.
- See you...
141
00:07:19,360 --> 00:07:22,360
- I'm going back into the office.
- (Dan) The minister's ducking.
142
00:07:22,720 --> 00:07:24,919
He's actually ducked.
143
00:07:24,920 --> 00:07:27,920
So what time does
this Daily Mail hack get here?
144
00:07:28,160 --> 00:07:31,160
- Ten minutes. It's Angela Heaney.
- So she left the Standard?
145
00:07:31,520 --> 00:07:34,039
- That's right.
- Go on, ask me some questions.
146
00:07:34,040 --> 00:07:36,719
OK, I'll be Angela and ask you some questions...
147
00:07:36,720 --> 00:07:38,479
My God, that's uncanny.
148
00:07:38,480 --> 00:07:40,999
Mind you, your tits are a bit bigger than hers.
149
00:07:41,000 --> 00:07:44,000
Is it true that although this Housing ill went
through Parliament with incredible ease...
150
00:07:46,360 --> 00:07:49,360
Actually, can you just do it as yourself?
Sorry, it's just slightly unsettling.
151
00:07:51,280 --> 00:07:54,280
Right, erm... That you'll find
a lot ofdifficulty in the real world...
152
00:07:56,640 --> 00:07:59,640
On the contrary, this ill is going to do
an extraordinary amount ofgood
153
00:08:00,400 --> 00:08:02,879
for an extraordinarily large number ofpeople.
154
00:08:02,880 --> 00:08:05,880
Ordinary people, but ordinary people who
deserve a bit ofthe extraordinary in their lives.
155
00:08:08,480 --> 00:08:10,639
(Laughs) Perfect, that's brilliant.
156
00:08:10,640 --> 00:08:13,079
- It's a piece ofpiss.
- There you are, you see.
157
00:08:13,080 --> 00:08:14,559
Go on ask me something hard.
158
00:08:14,560 --> 00:08:16,879
Where's the Nazi gold, you donkey shagger?
159
00:08:16,880 --> 00:08:19,880
I'm very pleased you asked that, Angela,
because let me just say
160
00:08:20,120 --> 00:08:23,120
that this ill is going to do
an extraordinary amount ofgood...
161
00:08:23,520 --> 00:08:25,119
(Dan) I'm not gonna...
162
00:08:25,120 --> 00:08:27,479
- Oh, hello.
- You've showered off, have you?
163
00:08:27,480 --> 00:08:30,480
- Good morning. Showered off, yes.
- Yes, thanks, Glenn.
164
00:08:30,520 --> 00:08:33,520
- Have you been playing...
- An early morning game ofsquash, yeah.
165
00:08:34,000 --> 00:08:36,599
Very good, I love... Squash is a fabulous game.
166
00:08:36,600 --> 00:08:38,279
- Do you play?
- A lot ofluck...
167
00:08:38,280 --> 00:08:41,239
- I don't any more, I used to play...
- What, club level?
168
00:08:41,240 --> 00:08:44,240
- Yeah.
- Were you on a ladder?
169
00:08:45,200 --> 00:08:47,639
No.
170
00:08:47,640 --> 00:08:50,640
- Anyway...
- Time for us to go and meet Angela now.
171
00:08:51,400 --> 00:08:54,279
Thanks.
I hope she doesn't bounce me offthe walls.
172
00:08:54,280 --> 00:08:57,280
Anyway, great to have talked to you guys, and...
173
00:08:57,520 --> 00:09:00,520
- Did you know Angela was in the building?
- Er, yes.
174
00:09:00,720 --> 00:09:03,720
Will she be jealous?
175
00:09:03,880 --> 00:09:05,959
Hi, Tom. What can we do for you?
176
00:09:05,960 --> 00:09:08,599
Well, I didn't know
what he was doing with his flat.
177
00:09:08,600 --> 00:09:11,079
I told him, that fucking flat....
178
00:09:11,080 --> 00:09:13,119
Well, they're not running with this?
179
00:09:13,120 --> 00:09:16,120
No, well, I know he's got an interview now
with, erm...Angela Heaney,
180
00:09:17,240 --> 00:09:20,240
you know, that twat bubble from the Standard.
181
00:09:20,600 --> 00:09:22,959
"uck, she's just gone to the Mail.
182
00:09:22,960 --> 00:09:25,960
I'm onto it.
183
00:09:26,840 --> 00:09:29,840
I wish you'd ask me a bit more about the ill
because it is an extraordinary triumph.
184
00:09:31,960 --> 00:09:34,439
- I am asking you about the ill.
- Good, good.
185
00:09:34,440 --> 00:09:37,440
Specifically about the
empty house management orders....
186
00:09:39,760 --> 00:09:42,760
How do they square with the fact
that you have a second empty property
187
00:09:43,320 --> 00:09:46,039
- that you won't sell?
- It's not technically empty.
188
00:09:46,040 --> 00:09:49,040
I would have stayed there recently,
but my daughter was seriously ill.
189
00:09:49,960 --> 00:09:52,960
- I've spoken to an Asian...
- She's seven.
190
00:09:54,920 --> 00:09:57,920
I've spoken to an Asian family who say they've
put in four separate offers on your flat,
191
00:09:59,760 --> 00:10:02,119
had them all rejected with no explanation.
192
00:10:02,120 --> 00:10:05,120
Right, OK.
193
00:10:05,280 --> 00:10:06,359
Get out ofthe way.
194
00:10:06,360 --> 00:10:09,360
- Is it because they're Asian?
- No. No, God, no.
195
00:10:10,160 --> 00:10:12,279
- Where the fuck is he?
- (Olly) The goldfish bowl.
196
00:10:12,280 --> 00:10:13,319
"uck!
197
00:10:13,320 --> 00:10:16,320
No, no, I'm very glad you brought that up,
because that...that gives me the opportunity to...
198
00:10:20,240 --> 00:10:23,119
Sorry...I...
199
00:10:23,120 --> 00:10:25,879
Er...just mucking about. Erm...
200
00:10:25,880 --> 00:10:28,439
I have always maintained very clearly...
201
00:10:28,440 --> 00:10:31,440
Hi, Angela. Sorry,
can I just borrow the minister for one moment?
202
00:10:32,040 --> 00:10:35,040
Sure. Sorry, be right back with you.
203
00:10:43,200 --> 00:10:46,200
(Inaudible shouting)
204
00:10:46,600 --> 00:10:49,600
(Inaudible shouting)
205
00:10:50,720 --> 00:10:53,720
- You're a fucking prick!
- Angela, can I get you a fresh cup ofcoffee?
206
00:10:55,360 --> 00:10:58,360
- No, I'm fine thanks.
- Um, would you like some tea?
207
00:10:58,480 --> 00:11:00,679
- Nope, nope.
- ..the fuck...
208
00:11:00,680 --> 00:11:02,479
- No biscuits or anything?
- No.
209
00:11:02,480 --> 00:11:05,480
- Do let me know ifyou need anything else.
- I will. Thanks very much.
210
00:11:05,960 --> 00:11:08,960
Get back in there and wrap this bullshit up.
211
00:11:13,800 --> 00:11:16,800
Ah. Hah!
212
00:11:17,880 --> 00:11:20,399
- it ofa disagreement.
- limey.
213
00:11:20,400 --> 00:11:23,400
Yeah. Erm...could you...
I'm just curious, could you hear?
214
00:11:24,160 --> 00:11:27,160
ecause we were actually...
We can be quite brutal to each other,
215
00:11:28,040 --> 00:11:30,639
because we're actually very, very good friends.
216
00:11:30,640 --> 00:11:32,119
Right.
217
00:11:32,120 --> 00:11:34,239
- You haven't accepted any offers?
- No!
218
00:11:34,240 --> 00:11:36,079
- Jesus.
- That wasn't the point.
219
00:11:36,080 --> 00:11:39,080
The whole deal was, we put the flat
on the market so ifthe press ask,
220
00:11:39,520 --> 00:11:42,520
we say, ''"uck off, he's selling it,''
they go away and Hugh has a place in town.
221
00:11:43,480 --> 00:11:45,799
Why is your girlfriend hitting us with this?
222
00:11:45,800 --> 00:11:48,800
- She's not my girlfriend, so I've no idea.
- You won't mind ifI kill her, then, will you?
223
00:11:50,320 --> 00:11:52,479
It'd solve a lot ofissues for me.
224
00:11:52,480 --> 00:11:55,480
Hey, hey, ifyou could sweet-talk
that sour-faced bitch into dropping it....
225
00:11:56,680 --> 00:11:59,639
IfI could talk that sour-faced bitch
into anything,
226
00:11:59,640 --> 00:12:01,639
I would have had a better four months.
227
00:12:01,640 --> 00:12:04,640
- I'll just have to kill the both ofyou then.
- Yeah, well.
228
00:12:04,760 --> 00:12:07,079
That's a joke, by the way, not a very nice one,
229
00:12:07,080 --> 00:12:10,080
which masks a lot ofnegative feelings
about this fucking department.
230
00:12:10,680 --> 00:12:12,639
- (Phone)
- Oh, Jesus.
231
00:12:12,640 --> 00:12:15,640
Tom Davies. Tom? Hello, how are you? Yes.
232
00:12:16,080 --> 00:12:19,080
No, he was already there when I got there,
he was talking to her.
233
00:12:19,360 --> 00:12:21,599
What is happening? What the hell was that?
234
00:12:21,600 --> 00:12:24,600
That was supposed to be a nice interview.
235
00:12:24,640 --> 00:12:27,640
- What on earth did you say to her?
- I think I denied being a racist. I hope so.
236
00:12:28,720 --> 00:12:31,559
You didn't say you have lots ofblack friends...
237
00:12:31,560 --> 00:12:33,719
Ofcourse not. Well, I haven't got any.
238
00:12:33,720 --> 00:12:36,679
- What did you say about the offers?
- I said I wasn't...
239
00:12:36,680 --> 00:12:39,680
someone else was handling the sale
and I wasn't aware ofany offers.
240
00:12:40,280 --> 00:12:42,399
Hugh?
241
00:12:42,400 --> 00:12:44,119
Did you mention me by name?
242
00:12:44,120 --> 00:12:46,599
Erm, possibly... I don't think...
243
00:12:46,600 --> 00:12:49,600
I may, in between denying racism,
possibly have, yes.
244
00:12:50,560 --> 00:12:53,560
Thank you, thank you very much,
thanks a fucking bunch.
245
00:12:53,840 --> 00:12:56,840
- OK.
- OK, so what's the line on this then?
246
00:12:58,280 --> 00:13:01,239
- I don't know, what is the line on this?
- Jesus!
247
00:13:01,240 --> 00:13:04,079
- I don't know, don't look at me.
- We need a line on this.
248
00:13:04,080 --> 00:13:07,080
- OK, we got movement, we got a break.
- What? What? What?
249
00:13:08,400 --> 00:13:10,559
- The flat's sold....
- What?
250
00:13:10,560 --> 00:13:13,560
To the Asian family,
for 40 grand below the asking price.
251
00:13:14,160 --> 00:13:15,559
- ut it's OK.
- What is it?
252
00:13:15,560 --> 00:13:16,599
- Malcolm?
- Yeah?
253
00:13:16,600 --> 00:13:18,279
- We're too late.
- What?
254
00:13:18,280 --> 00:13:21,280
All the papers have got it,
the Express has been making offers on it,
255
00:13:21,840 --> 00:13:24,599
- at the asking price and also 30,000 more,
- Jesus.
256
00:13:24,600 --> 00:13:27,119
- Haven't been accepted.
- We've got to stall.
257
00:13:27,120 --> 00:13:30,120
This is madness, I just own a flat,
I haven't raped somebody.
258
00:13:31,040 --> 00:13:34,040
- Yeah. They're calling the scandal "latgate.
- Scandal?
259
00:13:34,320 --> 00:13:36,719
That's crap. It's a crap name for a scandal.
260
00:13:36,720 --> 00:13:39,359
They should call it Notting Hill Gate-gate.
261
00:13:39,360 --> 00:13:42,119
Can we at least stop calling it a scandal?
262
00:13:42,120 --> 00:13:44,559
Are you joking? Are you joking, now?
263
00:13:44,560 --> 00:13:46,799
- On my way to stall.
- Yeah, get stalling.
264
00:13:46,800 --> 00:13:48,679
Ohh.
265
00:13:48,680 --> 00:13:51,680
Maybe we can just blame it all on Terri.
266
00:13:52,440 --> 00:13:55,440
That is an option, isn't it?
267
00:13:55,640 --> 00:13:58,640
- It's a flat.
- It is a second home.
268
00:13:59,200 --> 00:14:02,200
In a borough with thousands ofhomeless
people, which you have kept empty for ages.
269
00:14:03,480 --> 00:14:05,999
Have you not read your own Housing ill?
270
00:14:06,000 --> 00:14:09,000
I only kept it empty for a little while
to see my bloody family.
271
00:14:09,640 --> 00:14:12,640
Obviously, on reflection, I should have filled it
with prostitutes and rent boys
272
00:14:14,120 --> 00:14:17,120
and crack cocaine pimp tattoo freaks.
273
00:14:17,280 --> 00:14:20,280
Thanks to Dan Miller and his like,
the Housing ill is a success,
274
00:14:21,120 --> 00:14:23,319
but this is burying the whole thing.
275
00:14:23,320 --> 00:14:26,320
Well, what do you want me to do? Resign?
276
00:14:26,360 --> 00:14:28,839
No, no, no, that is... I'm not going over this.
277
00:14:28,840 --> 00:14:31,840
- The way out ofthis is for you to...
- This is madness, this desire for perfection.
278
00:14:33,880 --> 00:14:36,880
I am not perfect, I am just a person, right,
279
00:14:37,200 --> 00:14:40,200
I need to sleep, I need to eat,
occasionally I need to take a dump.
280
00:14:41,640 --> 00:14:43,039
So what's next?
281
00:14:43,040 --> 00:14:46,040
Do we put that on the evening news,
on the front page?
282
00:14:46,280 --> 00:14:49,280
''Minister In Disgusting Defecation Outburst?''
283
00:14:49,520 --> 00:14:52,520
Molly Sugden at Number Ten.
''Enjoy your shit, Mr Abbot?''
284
00:14:52,840 --> 00:14:55,840
They should just clone ministers,
so we're born at 55
285
00:14:55,960 --> 00:14:58,960
with no past and no flats and no genitals.
286
00:14:59,600 --> 00:15:01,639
Just a world ofrobots in a sort of...
287
00:15:01,640 --> 00:15:04,359
It's like a futuristic film, and you'd enjoy that,
288
00:15:04,360 --> 00:15:07,360
you'd be in your little space station
surrounded by obedient androids,
289
00:15:09,440 --> 00:15:12,440
like that fucking brushed aluminium
Dan Miller cyberprick.
290
00:15:14,320 --> 00:15:17,320
It is possible
to have a good resignation, you know?
291
00:15:17,720 --> 00:15:20,720
A good resignation? Oh, I'm looking forward
to how you're going to sell this to me.
292
00:15:22,200 --> 00:15:25,200
Look, people really like it
when you go just a bit early,
293
00:15:25,600 --> 00:15:28,479
you know, steely-jawed,
faraway look in your eyes,
294
00:15:28,480 --> 00:15:31,480
before they get to sitting round in pubs
saying ''That fucker's got to go.''
295
00:15:32,360 --> 00:15:35,360
You surprise them.
''limey, he's gone, I didn't expect that.
296
00:15:35,800 --> 00:15:38,239
''Resigned? You don't see that much any more.
297
00:15:38,240 --> 00:15:41,240
''Old school, respect, I rather liked the guy,
he was hounded out by the fucking press.''
298
00:15:42,720 --> 00:15:44,799
How about that, huh?
299
00:15:44,800 --> 00:15:47,800
What a way to go, yeah?
300
00:15:48,280 --> 00:15:51,280
It's probably going to be...
it's going to be Hugh that has to go this time.
301
00:15:52,840 --> 00:15:55,840
Yeah. (Laughs)
302
00:15:57,800 --> 00:16:00,800
Yeah, it is, it's very sad, very sad.
303
00:16:02,120 --> 00:16:04,799
OK, Tom, yes, indeed, yes, indeed.
304
00:16:04,800 --> 00:16:07,519
Er, two minutes. Two minutes.
305
00:16:07,520 --> 00:16:10,520
That's Tom, he's finishing with the prime
minister. I'm going to go and join him.
306
00:16:12,160 --> 00:16:14,399
- You might as well stay here.
- Yeah.
307
00:16:14,400 --> 00:16:17,400
- I'll try and make it quick.
- Sure it wouldn't help ifI went in?
308
00:16:17,840 --> 00:16:20,599
No, no, I mean
we're going to be talking about you.
309
00:16:20,600 --> 00:16:22,559
- It would be awkward, yes?
- Yeah. Ofcourse.
310
00:16:22,560 --> 00:16:23,919
- Very awkward.
- Yup.
311
00:16:23,920 --> 00:16:26,920
You just relax,
help yourselfto a paper or something.
312
00:16:29,640 --> 00:16:32,640
It'll be fine in the end, we'll just
get another doomed middle-aged man in
313
00:16:34,480 --> 00:16:37,480
on Monday morning, come through the door,
stride about a bit,
314
00:16:38,040 --> 00:16:41,039
spunk offand I'll have to mop up the mess.
315
00:16:41,040 --> 00:16:44,040
It'll be business as usual.
316
00:17:08,480 --> 00:17:11,480
The whole heat could come out ofthis situation
ifI went.
317
00:17:12,560 --> 00:17:15,560
It's not come to
any kind ofresignation yet, surely?
318
00:17:15,600 --> 00:17:17,239
Do you know what pisses me off
319
00:17:17,240 --> 00:17:20,240
After 37 years, without a moment's thought,
he's prepared to drop me right in it.
320
00:17:23,080 --> 00:17:26,079
He just panicked.
Ifanyone's going to resign, I should.
321
00:17:26,080 --> 00:17:28,359
No, no, that's decent ofyou, but I'll go.
322
00:17:28,360 --> 00:17:29,759
You should stay, you know,
323
00:17:29,760 --> 00:17:32,760
any fucker can sit at the end ofa corridor
behind a pot plant.
324
00:17:33,200 --> 00:17:36,200
ut you're the man who stands behind his desk
making sure the pen works.
325
00:17:36,800 --> 00:17:39,800
So maybe you should go? Yeah.
326
00:17:39,920 --> 00:17:42,319
- Now, hang on.
- Yeah, you've convinced me.
327
00:17:42,320 --> 00:17:45,320
- I think it would be better.
- No, I'm just saying, in the scheme ofthings.
328
00:17:46,200 --> 00:17:49,039
- I'm not saying I should go.
- You just said you should.
329
00:17:49,040 --> 00:17:52,040
- I'm talking academically.
- You said... That wasn't academic talk.
330
00:17:52,880 --> 00:17:55,119
- It absolutely was academic.
- It wasn't.
331
00:17:55,120 --> 00:17:57,799
- I'll write it down...
- That's real virtual talk.
332
00:17:57,800 --> 00:18:00,800
- I'm having an academic discussion.
- No. I'm having a real discussion with you.
333
00:18:02,160 --> 00:18:05,119
- We can reset for a real discussion...
- Resign now,
334
00:18:05,120 --> 00:18:07,519
and I'll put the letter on Hugh's desk.
335
00:18:07,520 --> 00:18:10,159
Well I could very easily say the same thing. I...
336
00:18:10,160 --> 00:18:12,319
- I'm not doing that.
- Why the fuck not?
337
00:18:12,320 --> 00:18:15,320
Hugh's my friend. I won't do that for him.
I'll stay and stand behind him.
338
00:18:16,160 --> 00:18:19,160
I'm just the counter man in McDonald's.
You're the clown running the shop.
339
00:18:20,520 --> 00:18:23,520
You're the one who they want to see
strung up from a lamppost by his fucking wig.
340
00:18:25,040 --> 00:18:27,439
- What does that make me?
- Ronald McDonald.
341
00:18:27,440 --> 00:18:29,959
Well, fuck off.
342
00:18:29,960 --> 00:18:32,879
- I'm not going, mate.
- No, neither am I.
343
00:18:32,880 --> 00:18:35,880
So, what did the PM say?
344
00:18:37,560 --> 00:18:39,359
There's going to be an inquiry.
345
00:18:39,360 --> 00:18:40,959
(Sighs)
346
00:18:40,960 --> 00:18:43,119
Oh, yes, oh, yes.
347
00:18:43,120 --> 00:18:45,679
- Thank you, you're a fucking star.
- No problem.
348
00:18:45,680 --> 00:18:48,680
Sam. Yeah, ofcourse.
Hugh, Hugh. It's the prime minister. Could you...
349
00:18:50,920 --> 00:18:53,920
Whoo!
350
00:18:54,080 --> 00:18:57,080
(Sighs)
351
00:19:06,520 --> 00:19:08,359
- Mmm.
- Hello.
352
00:19:08,360 --> 00:19:10,479
Oh! Hello.
353
00:19:10,480 --> 00:19:12,959
- Is everything all right, Minister?
- Mmm.
354
00:19:12,960 --> 00:19:15,839
- These weren't special biscuits, were they?
- No, no.
355
00:19:15,840 --> 00:19:17,159
- Good.
- How are you?
356
00:19:17,160 --> 00:19:20,160
Well I've been better to be honest, but there's
going to be an inquiry so, fingers crossed.
357
00:19:22,480 --> 00:19:25,480
- Right, well we're all rooting for you.
- Oh! Thank you very much.
358
00:19:28,080 --> 00:19:31,080
Can I get you a chair?
Would you like to sit down?
359
00:19:32,000 --> 00:19:35,000
- Yes, please.
- OK.
360
00:19:38,880 --> 00:19:41,519
- y the biscuits.
- Thank you.
361
00:19:41,520 --> 00:19:44,520
All right?
362
00:19:51,800 --> 00:19:54,800
Erm, can I get you some more biscuits
or a coffee?
363
00:19:56,200 --> 00:19:59,200
- Yes, please.
- OK.
364
00:20:02,040 --> 00:20:03,079
(Phone)
365
00:20:03,080 --> 00:20:04,639
- Olly Reeder.
- What?
366
00:20:04,640 --> 00:20:07,359
- Put me on the speakerphone.
- It's the minister.
367
00:20:07,360 --> 00:20:10,360
- Thel're going to have an inquiry.
- Where are you?
368
00:20:10,560 --> 00:20:13,560
I'm still at Number Ten,
they're going to have an inquiry.
369
00:20:13,720 --> 00:20:15,879
- Yes!
- Great.
370
00:20:15,880 --> 00:20:17,439
Who are thelgoing to have.?
371
00:20:17,440 --> 00:20:20,440
I don't know, I don't know
whether we get any say in it.
372
00:20:20,600 --> 00:20:23,199
ut, I mean, Lord Hibbert's very nice.
373
00:20:23,200 --> 00:20:26,200
I was with him at the "A Cup semifinal last year
374
00:20:26,680 --> 00:20:29,680
and we were both trying to make out
we had a clue what was going on.
375
00:20:30,360 --> 00:20:33,360
We've talked before about
the ideal person to head an inquiry.
376
00:20:33,840 --> 00:20:36,679
It was a tie between
Eamonn Holmes and Alan enett.
377
00:20:36,680 --> 00:20:39,639
(Glenn) I tell lou w yho'd be good,
Lord Monckton.
378
00:20:39,640 --> 00:20:41,439
- Lord Monckton?
- (Glenn) Yeah.
379
00:20:41,440 --> 00:20:44,440
Oh, Lord Monckton certainly
is in the frame here at Number Ten.
380
00:20:45,240 --> 00:20:48,240
- (Glenn) Uh-huh.?
- Yeah. I'm with the PM's people now.
381
00:20:48,880 --> 00:20:51,880
- Hugh?
- Oh, Malcolm's just joined us.
382
00:20:52,480 --> 00:20:53,999
Right Hugh, good news.
383
00:20:54,000 --> 00:20:57,000
The PM's asking the Right Honourable Lord
Monckton ofCheshunt to head the inquiry.
384
00:20:58,640 --> 00:21:01,640
- Good, it is Monckton.
- (Glenn) Yes! Hugh!
385
00:21:02,080 --> 00:21:05,079
All right, fuck off.
You've got a department to run.
386
00:21:05,080 --> 00:21:06,839
- Thanks, Malcolm.
- Yeah, yeah.
387
00:21:06,840 --> 00:21:08,279
Thanks, yeah.
388
00:21:08,280 --> 00:21:11,280
Look at this one.
''PM Just Can't Kick The Abbot.''
389
00:21:11,800 --> 00:21:14,800
- Dreadful picture. You look like a sales rep.
- They've Photoshopped that.
390
00:21:16,160 --> 00:21:19,160
Surprising they haven't got anything better
to write about after, what? "our, five days now?
391
00:21:21,040 --> 00:21:24,040
Until Monckton reports,
they're going to stay on this. They want blood.
392
00:21:24,760 --> 00:21:26,279
- (Phone)
- Oh, hang on.
393
00:21:26,280 --> 00:21:28,119
Good morning, Malcolm.
394
00:21:28,120 --> 00:21:31,039
I want you, Terri and Olly over here right now.
395
00:21:31,040 --> 00:21:34,040
Not Hugh,
do not bring Hugh to Downing Street.
396
00:21:34,160 --> 00:21:36,559
- Put him on for me for a minute.
- Yes, hang on.
397
00:21:36,560 --> 00:21:39,560
- It's Malcolm. He wants to speak to you.
- Go on.
398
00:21:40,320 --> 00:21:43,320
Right Hugh, I've seen Monckton's report.
It's not good.
399
00:21:43,400 --> 00:21:46,400
- OK.
- He's talked to that driver you got rid of.
400
00:21:46,480 --> 00:21:49,480
Oh my God. I never liked him,
I told Glenn I didn't liked him.
401
00:21:49,760 --> 00:21:52,639
The driver. He was a smirky bastard.
402
00:21:52,640 --> 00:21:55,640
He told them he heard lou and Glenn talking about
putting lourflat on the market
403
00:21:56,800 --> 00:21:58,439
but not accepting anl offers.
404
00:21:58,440 --> 00:22:01,440
In passing,
it was just mentioned in passing, just words.
405
00:22:01,640 --> 00:22:04,599
It's not as though we were
plotting like Guy "awkes,
406
00:22:04,600 --> 00:22:07,600
concocting our evil master plan
to not sell a two-bedroom flat.
407
00:22:08,000 --> 00:22:10,199
I didn't know Glenn had gone ahead.
408
00:22:10,200 --> 00:22:13,200
I'm just tired, Malcolm, is that a crime now?
"eeling shattered?
409
00:22:14,200 --> 00:22:17,200
That is not going to be the headline,
the headline is going to be, you have lied.
410
00:22:18,840 --> 00:22:21,840
Right, look, I w yant lourguls overhere,
but not lou, understand.? Not lou.
411
00:22:23,520 --> 00:22:26,520
Would it help ifI was there?
Or will you all be talking about me?
412
00:22:26,960 --> 00:22:29,960
We'll all be talking about you.
413
00:22:30,800 --> 00:22:33,800
Right, I'll ring for a cab.
It's quicker than calling one ofthe cars up. OK?
414
00:22:35,440 --> 00:22:37,639
- (All) OK.
- Right, well let's get going.
415
00:22:37,640 --> 00:22:40,319
- Yeah.
- Ah, Hugh, bye.
416
00:22:40,320 --> 00:22:42,159
- OK. Yep.
- Yep. See you later.
417
00:22:42,160 --> 00:22:45,160
- OK.
- Probably, anyway.
418
00:22:45,640 --> 00:22:48,640
(Hugh whistles)
419
00:22:49,320 --> 00:22:52,320
Hugh. I mean, with the other two,
it's just another day, isn't it?
420
00:22:53,520 --> 00:22:56,520
- I know, I know.
- I want you to know I'm on your side.
421
00:22:56,800 --> 00:22:59,800
You know? I wouldn't...
422
00:23:01,240 --> 00:23:04,240
- We'll ride again.
- OK.
423
00:23:14,600 --> 00:23:17,600
Department ofSocial Affairs. Department
offucking, shocking, shitty, charlatan shits.
424
00:23:20,840 --> 00:23:23,840
That's what...
"eet offthe furniture, you Oxbridge twat.
425
00:23:24,280 --> 00:23:26,479
You're not in a punt now.
426
00:23:26,480 --> 00:23:29,480
Yeah.
427
00:23:32,120 --> 00:23:35,120
Yes! I am king
ofremembering my own password.
428
00:23:35,160 --> 00:23:37,359
- (Knock at door)
- Yep?
429
00:23:37,360 --> 00:23:40,159
- Hello, Dan.
- Hi Hugh. Is Olly about? I need him...
430
00:23:40,160 --> 00:23:43,160
- No, he's with Tucker. Well, they all are.
- Is something up?
431
00:23:44,000 --> 00:23:47,000
No, they're just talking about...
A directive came from one ofthe think-tanks
432
00:23:48,960 --> 00:23:51,960
about how the press secretaries should
minute meetings with lobbyists and, erm...
433
00:23:53,600 --> 00:23:56,600
- Right.
- So they're just talking about how fucked I am.
434
00:23:58,680 --> 00:24:00,119
Oh, the report?
435
00:24:00,120 --> 00:24:03,119
Yeah. It's like Monkton
sat in front ofthe word processor
436
00:24:03,120 --> 00:24:06,120
and let the righteous anger
ofthe independent judiciary flow out.
437
00:24:06,800 --> 00:24:09,800
It's such a something and nothing issue
to get crucified over.
438
00:24:10,160 --> 00:24:11,839
- Isn't it?
- It's just a flat.
439
00:24:11,840 --> 00:24:14,840
Precisely, just because I'm not some
brushed aluminium cyberprick like, er...
440
00:24:17,680 --> 00:24:20,680
- Like, er...
- Like Olly.
441
00:24:20,880 --> 00:24:22,439
Yeah. ut, anyway,
442
00:24:22,440 --> 00:24:25,440
- I've missed my ideal resigning point.
- Yes.
443
00:24:25,720 --> 00:24:28,720
With every day I delay,
it's another year before I can get back again.
444
00:24:30,360 --> 00:24:33,279
- Mm.
- IfI had resigned the day I was appointed,
445
00:24:33,280 --> 00:24:36,280
I'd actually be prime minister by now.
446
00:24:36,560 --> 00:24:39,560
The line is that we don't throw a good man out
to the wolves over one single little fuck-up.
447
00:24:41,400 --> 00:24:43,879
- So Hugh's staying?
- Yeah.
448
00:24:43,880 --> 00:24:46,519
- We tell the wolves to fuck off.
- Not exactly.
449
00:24:46,520 --> 00:24:49,520
- They need a blood sacrifice.
- Indeed they do, they want a head on a plate.
450
00:24:51,280 --> 00:24:54,280
We've got to give them head,
is that what you're saying?
451
00:24:56,080 --> 00:24:59,080
You're clever aren't you? Very, very clever.
452
00:24:59,680 --> 00:25:02,680
How much does your head weigh?
I don't know. Eight pounds?
453
00:25:03,320 --> 00:25:05,999
Maybe more.
454
00:25:06,000 --> 00:25:08,799
- Mm.
- It's not my head. I've only got halfa head.
455
00:25:08,800 --> 00:25:10,919
I'm a half-head.
456
00:25:10,920 --> 00:25:12,799
- One ofyou's got to decide.
- Jesus Christ.
457
00:25:12,800 --> 00:25:14,799
Which ofyou will do the decent thing?
458
00:25:14,800 --> 00:25:17,800
We've been through this.
Apparently I'm Ronald fucking McDonald.
459
00:25:18,320 --> 00:25:21,320
Hang on, why are you not included in this?
Why is it one ofus two?
460
00:25:21,680 --> 00:25:24,319
IfI've got to resign, then you've got to resign.
461
00:25:24,320 --> 00:25:27,320
- ''IfI've got to resign...''
- I answer to you on matters ofpolicy.
462
00:25:27,680 --> 00:25:30,559
In which case, he's got to go,
because I answer to him.
463
00:25:30,560 --> 00:25:33,560
- So we've all got to go now, eh?
- Well, I am going nowhere.
464
00:25:33,600 --> 00:25:35,679
I didn't do anything, I did nothing.
465
00:25:35,680 --> 00:25:38,119
- I am as clean as a whistle.
- Oh, Terri, grow up.
466
00:25:38,120 --> 00:25:40,519
Don't give me that pile offucking bollocks.
467
00:25:40,520 --> 00:25:43,520
Just because you're a civil servant,
don't think your shit doesn't smell.
468
00:25:44,400 --> 00:25:46,239
- I know things about you.
- What?
469
00:25:46,240 --> 00:25:48,399
- What do you know?
- Yeah, we know things.
470
00:25:48,400 --> 00:25:51,079
- Oh, knob off. You know bugger all.
- (Terri) What?
471
00:25:51,080 --> 00:25:54,039
All you know is how to suck up
to the new kid on the block.
472
00:25:54,040 --> 00:25:56,879
- (Camply) ''Oooh, what a lovely backhand.''
- "uck off.
473
00:25:56,880 --> 00:25:59,880
- ''Oooh, my stroke is so hard.''
- You're so fucking repressed!
474
00:26:00,120 --> 00:26:02,999
- I was just playing squash.
- Glenn, what do you know?
475
00:26:03,000 --> 00:26:04,959
- What do you think you know?
- I know.
476
00:26:04,960 --> 00:26:07,519
- What is it?
- I'm going to go and see Tucker.
477
00:26:07,520 --> 00:26:09,759
- I'm going to resign.
- You don't need to.
478
00:26:09,760 --> 00:26:11,799
- Yeah, I know.
- Then don't, Hugh.
479
00:26:11,800 --> 00:26:14,559
No, I've been thinking,
it will be very, very good.
480
00:26:14,560 --> 00:26:17,560
The report isn't out for three days
and, er...I can leave before it with dignity.
481
00:26:19,800 --> 00:26:21,639
I'll be seen as an honourable man.
482
00:26:21,640 --> 00:26:24,640
I'll be in government in two years
with a clean slate and a fresh tie.
483
00:26:25,200 --> 00:26:28,200
And I'll be shot ofthis fucking department.
It takes four days to get a memo through.
484
00:26:29,520 --> 00:26:32,520
Social Affairs. What the fuck
does that actually mean? It's so vague.
485
00:26:34,680 --> 00:26:37,680
You know, ''Hello, I'm Hugh Abbot,
the Minister for, I don't know, stuff.''
486
00:26:38,680 --> 00:26:41,680
Look at these civil servants here. You wouldn't
get these dweebs at the "oreign Office.
487
00:26:43,480 --> 00:26:46,480
This place is packed to the gills with dreck....
488
00:26:47,280 --> 00:26:50,279
No offence.
489
00:26:50,280 --> 00:26:51,679
Well, I accept it.
490
00:26:51,680 --> 00:26:54,680
On behalfofthe PM, I accept your resignation.
As you've worked out, it's probably for the best.
491
00:26:56,720 --> 00:26:58,959
- Can I help?
- Just going to see Mr Tucker.
492
00:26:58,960 --> 00:27:01,960
- He has someone with him.
- It won't take long, it's quite urgent.
493
00:27:02,560 --> 00:27:05,560
- I'm sorry, you'll have to wait.
- Right.
494
00:27:07,720 --> 00:27:10,720
- (Sighs)
- Can I get you a biscuit?
495
00:27:10,800 --> 00:27:13,439
No, thank you.
496
00:27:13,440 --> 00:27:16,440
You won't regret this, Dan.
Trust me, you won't.
497
00:27:16,520 --> 00:27:19,039
- Yeah, let's hope not.
- (Laughs)
498
00:27:19,040 --> 00:27:22,040
- Hey, you must be gutted.
- Yeah. Yeah.
499
00:27:26,320 --> 00:27:28,599
- Hi.
- Dan.
500
00:27:28,600 --> 00:27:30,999
- Oh, you're seeing Malcolm, are you?
- Yep.
501
00:27:31,000 --> 00:27:34,000
- Thank you.
- Thank you, Susan. That was fine.
502
00:27:34,720 --> 00:27:37,720
Malcolm, I've made a decision.
503
00:27:38,080 --> 00:27:41,080
Do you know, what I said about memos
in the department,
504
00:27:41,560 --> 00:27:44,279
I mean, that's sortable, we can just sort it,
505
00:27:44,280 --> 00:27:46,439
you know, it's just an admin thing...
506
00:27:46,440 --> 00:27:49,199
- Don't worry, we understand.
- (Glenn) No one's...
507
00:27:49,200 --> 00:27:52,039
- Lovely new memo on urban renewal.
- Oh, good.
508
00:27:52,040 --> 00:27:55,040
You see, here's a memo
and it's only taken me a day to get...
509
00:27:55,240 --> 00:27:57,799
to get to me, so things are looking up already.
510
00:27:57,800 --> 00:28:00,800
Dan really did himself
some favours there, you know.
511
00:28:00,960 --> 00:28:03,519
Would you like to hear what our leader thinks?
512
00:28:03,520 --> 00:28:06,519
This is the PM's reply to his resignation letter.
513
00:28:06,520 --> 00:28:08,999
''You are a dazzlingly bright, talented,
514
00:28:09,000 --> 00:28:12,000
committed and honourable new force
in ritish politics.
515
00:28:12,520 --> 00:28:14,359
''I am immensely sorry to lose you,
516
00:28:14,360 --> 00:28:17,360
''but I predict you will one day
find yourselfin very high office indeed.''
517
00:28:20,240 --> 00:28:23,240
Well that's just easy, though.
Resigning's just...that's cheap and lazy.
518
00:28:24,360 --> 00:28:27,360
(Glenn) Yeah.
(Terri) He's a little shit anyway, Dan Miller.
519
00:28:27,560 --> 00:28:30,560
- (Olly) I never liked him.
- I never liked him, I never ever liked him.
520
00:28:31,440 --> 00:28:33,319
(Olly) It's really late, let's...
521
00:28:33,320 --> 00:28:35,919
- Come on, Glenn, time to go home.
- (Glenn) Coming.
522
00:28:35,920 --> 00:28:37,439
(Hugh) I thought Dan was good.
523
00:28:37,440 --> 00:28:39,279
(Olly) See you.
(Terri) Night.
524
00:28:39,280 --> 00:28:40,719
(Glenn) Good night, Hugh.
525
00:28:40,720 --> 00:28:43,720
(Hugh) Oh, God.
526
00:28:44,920 --> 00:28:47,920
(Sighs)
527
00:28:48,680 --> 00:28:51,680
Actually, can I stay on your sofa tonight?
528
00:28:53,640 --> 00:28:56,640
- Yep.
- Thanks.
529
00:28:56,690 --> 00:29:01,240
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