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Ever since our move to California,
it's been one step forward, two steps back.
Take the Kicks.
After the whole club team fiasco,
I finally managed to get back in their good graces.
But that lasted a whole two minutes
before we lost our coach.
On the bright side,
I still have this to clear my mind.
And no one can take that away.
โช Five, six โช
โช Five, six, seven, eight โช
โชโช [rock]
Hey. So, this is what I love about living in SoCal.
Picking fruit off your own tree.
Tom, we don't have an orange tree.
Oh, that would explain the dirty look I got from the neighbor.
- I'll take a couple stolen oranges. - They're not stolen.
People here don't appreciate what they have.
They let fruit rot on the tree and fall right to the ground.
It's a good thing we came along. We give fruit purpose.
If you're done with your models,
I'm gonna make some orange juice.
Hey, Dev. Want some freshly squeezed O.J.?
Pass. I don't wanna be late for school.
My run went overtime.
Trying to make up for no soccer practice yesterday.
That's too bad about Coach Flores.
Yeah, it's a real bummer for the Kicks.
Pretty sure it's an even bigger bummer for Coach Flores.
Her mom's the one who got sick.
I know, and I feel really bad for her.
But I also feel bad for us.
We have a game against Glenview in four days,
and another one against La Salle next Saturday.
Well, this doesn't have to be a setback, Dev.
Dad, is this gonna be another hummus related story?
As a matter of fact, it is.
But it doesn't mean it's not relevant.
I had a dentist appointment.
I was gone all afternoon.
But things still got done. You know why?
Because when you have tahini and chickpeas, you can still make hummus.
I get what you're saying, Dad.
As long as you have a ball and a field, you can still practice.
- Exactly. - You got that from that?
So we just practice on our own until we get a new coach?
Exactly. We have everything we need.
Remember, I'm equipment manager?
Don't let that go to your head. It's just a title.
But if we don't have a coach,
who's gonna stop Mirabelle from making fun of me when I screw up?
How about I will, when you stop screwing up?
Trust me, it's gonna be a lot of fun.
Wait. Mr. Rivas, what's going on?
Principal Walker told me to lock up all the equipment.
But we need that stuff to practice.
I don't know what to tell you. I'm just doing my job.
So, what do we do now, equipment manager?
I'm sorry, but I can't give you access to the equipment without a coach.
Devin can make sure everything gets put back.
Yeah, she's our equipment manager.
Which is totally more than just a title.
Look, I appreciate your enthusiasm for soccer,
but it's not that simple.
Adult supervision is required
to practice on school property. It's the law.
- What about my-- - Your older sister? No.
And while we're on the subject, no parents, grand-parents,
nannies, or other caretakers. It has to be a school employee.
But we have two games coming up.
Sorry, but until I find a new coach, the Kicks are suspended.
- Hey, Mom. - Hi.
You're still unpacking boxes? Thought we were done.
These were in the garage, but this is the last of them.
We are now officially Californians.
Yep. There's no turning back now.
So how was your day?
Fine. Usual stuff.
Pop quiz, lunch, cut up a frog.
Oh, I got invited to a birthday party Friday after school.
It's at a laser tag place.
That's wonderful.
I mean, not about the chopped up frog.
I mean, I'm glad you're making friends.
You, Devin, Dad.
Yeah, well, I'm not going.
What? Why not?
I thought you loved laser tag.
Yes, when I was, like, seven.
Besides, this Lucas kid isn't interested in being friends.
He just wants presents.
I'm sure that's not true.
Really?
Because he sent everyone a link to his registry.
- Too slow! - Hey, what are you doing?
I need to kick the ball around with you guys.
- I'm going crazy. - Get your own practice.
That's the point, Steven. We can't practice
until the Principal finds a replacement for Coach Flores.
Yeah, I heard that. Ouch.
Tell me about it. We have two games coming up.
If we don't practice, we're gonna get killed.
You guys should be used to that by now.
- Hey! I wasn't ready. - [laughter]
So did Principal Walker say when you guys are getting a new coach?
No, but I'm sure a lot of people will be interested.
We have a girls' soccer team?
Do I get a better parking space?
- No. - Yeah, hard pass.
Seriously, how long have we had a girls' soccer team?
- Excuse me, Principal Walker? - Oh, hi, Devin.
What is it? A sub flaked out,
and I have 45 minutes to find a replacement.
I have to find a sub for a sub. It never ends.
Well, I was just wondering. Do you have any good news?
Actually, I do.
A parent donated an espresso machine for the teachers' lounge.
You know the one with the little pods?
This is great coffee.
Actually, I was talking about the coach situation.
Right. A coach for the girls' soccer team,
- I found some good candidates. - Fantastic.
It would be, if they wanted to do it.
- What do you mean? - It's a voluntary position,
and I had no takers.
Now, on the bright side,
everyone now knows we have a girls' soccer team.
But there's gotta be something you can do.
We're supposed to play Glenview in two days.
You're not gonna stop bothering me, are you?
Soccer means a lot to me...
to the team.
I can see that.
I have an idea.
We have to practice with the boys.
- That's totally lame. - Why?
They have a field, they have a coach.
Until Principal Walker finds a new coach,
I think this is a pretty good solution.
And they have plenty of soccer balls.
And their field is level, which is always good for playing soccer.
Mm-hmm.
Let's do it,
Heads up. Heads up. Cody, see your striker!
Thank you. Nice pass.
Now go to goal. Go to goal!
Talk to each other, D!
Nice shot! Let's do it again.
Yep. Pretty great solution.
I really have to use the bathroom,
but I don't wanna miss our chance to go in.
Coach: Nice, Cody!
At this rate, we may never get our turn.
Forget our turn.
At this rate, we'll have to forfeit Glenview.
Hey, do you mind?
Well, at least you got some practice in.
Coach: Let's do it again!
Well, that was a giganto waste of time.
I know! I held it in the whole time,
and we didn't even get to play.
I gotta go.
Well, I guess we're forfeiting the Glenview game.
What do we do now?
Wait, why are you asking her?
She's just like all the rest of us.
I mean, it's not like she has magic powers
to make things happen around here.
That was amazing.
Why are you spying on me?
How-- how do you know how to do that stuff?
It's not that hard.
All you need is a broom and a trash bin.
No, I mean all the soccer moves.
It was nothing. I was just trying to pass the time.
Really? 'Cause when I try to pass the time,
I just nap.
Usually in the middle of class.
Well, only the boring ones.
Mr. Rivas, you have some serious skills.
Maybe I played some soccer back in my country.
But everyone played in my country.
So now, if you will excuse me,
I have a lot of work to do.
- Hey, Dad. - Hey, buddy.
Hey. What's this?
Wait. Is this the Nikon AFVR lens?
I can't believe you actually picked up on my subtle hints.
Subtle? You sent us an email
along with a link and an online coupon.
Well, I'm just trying to save you guys money.
Mm-hm.
Anyway, no need for formality.
We're family. I'll just take it unwrapped.
Sorry, Bailey. I didn't buy you an expensive lens
for no reason at all.
This is something called the Perplexus Epic.
It was on Lucas' registry.
I told you I'm not going to his birthday.
Look, making new friends in a new place is hard.
Trust me, I know.
Your mom's right. But we all have to try.
I've gone out of my way to connect with my co-workers,
And your mom, well, she hung upside down in an aerial hoop class
just so she could meet new people.
And they seem nice.
I just was too dizzy to talk to anyone after.
I just think it's important to make new friends here.
I made a friend. Remember Max?
Right. With the fedora.
He's adorable, but this gives you a chance
to make a group of friends like you had in Connecticut.
A group of friends takes time.
And Lucas is not a frontrunner.
Just give Lucas a chance.
It's only a couple of hours.
And there's cake.
You make a very strong point.
[cell phone rings]
Hey, Dev. You busy?
Just doing my Spanish homework.
What's up?
Or should I say que pasa?
Hm. Very good.
Or should I say muy bueno?
I don't know. Should you? I'm having trouble.
Let's put that on hold. I have major news.
Do you know who Mr. Rivas is?
The head custodian at Kentville.
No, I mean do you know who he really is?
Or was. His full name is Pablo Rivas,
and he played professional soccer
for the Argentinean national team.
He even went to the World Cup.
Seriously? How did you find out?
I went to the library and looked it up in an encyclopedia.
Where do you think? I Googled it.
A professional soccer player.
It totally makes sense now.
Gosh, can you imagine if he was our new coach?
I mean, we could really go places.
Yeah. We might even be able to win a game.
Well, I-I was shooting a little higher,
but whatever.
Amazing detective work.
Hm. Thank you. Oh!
I also found out that in Argentina,
over 100 people are killed each year by crocodiles.
But that's probably not relevant to this case.
Yeah.
So how do you know he's the same guy?
How many Pablo Rivases could there be?
In Argentina, it's probably like John Smith.
Emma also found pictures. Show her.
This guy looks nothing like him.
She's right. Where's his bald spot?
No, no, no, you guys,
this is from 20 years ago.
He was younger and in shape.
Probably 'cause he was a champion soccer player.
Oh, hi, Mr. Rivas.
Spying on me again?
This time we actually were.
Look, we know who you are.
You're Pablo Rivas.
Yeah. So?
Everybody knows my name.
It's on my employee badge.
She means we know who you really are.
You played soccer for the Argentinean national team.
You even went to the World Cup in 1994.
And this is you when you had hair.
Or is it?
Yeah, okay. That's me.
I've put on a few pounds, huh?
See, I told-- Didn't I tell--
I told you. I told you guys.
The internet is never wrong.
So, uh, did you know that they're looking for someone
to coach the girls' soccer team?
I mean, you could be our coach.
Me? No.
Not interested in that.
But you're perfect for the job.
I have a job. And that job comes
with a lot of responsibilities.
See that?
That's a list of everything that I have to do.
That doesn't include turning this storage room into an office.
for Mr. Messler.
Apparently, he can't get along with his office mate.
Come on. We need a coach.
We just had to forfeit a game.
Yeah, and if we don't find a coach soon,
we're gonna have to forfeit next Saturday's game.
What can we do to change your mind?
Nothing.
But since you're here,
you mind holding that up so I can see it?
Out of the way.
[lasers firing]
Oh, that was the second time, buddy.
You get tagged a third time, you have to sit out this round,
so be careful out there, okay?
Got it.
[laser firing]
Oop. Got tagged a third time.
Guess I'm out.
Devin: Now will you agree to be our coach?
What's going on here? Who did this?
We did. All of us.
Except for her. She mostly played on her phone.
How many people does it take to clean up?
I don't understand. Why?
We looked at your "to do" list.
We figured if we helped you out,
you would have time to coach us.
The only thing we didn't do is add Freon to the HVAC system.
Mainly because we don't know what that is.
Well, um--
The place looks great.
Well, my mom and I watch a lot of HGTV together.
I am...
speechless.
You're a wonderful bunch of girls.
And you definitely deserve a new coach.
Fantastic. So you'll do it?
No.
All: What? Why?
Wait, that doesn't make any--
Sorry, but my soccer days are over.
It was a lifetime ago and I have no intention to go back to it.
Except for the full head of hair.
I wouldn't mind having that again.
So we did all this work for nothing?
Yeah, we wore rubber gloves and everything.
Really? We?
Look, we don't just play soccer to fill our time.
We're serious about it.
I mean, I-- I want to play professionally,
and maybe even go to the World Cup like you some day.
You know what happens after you make it to the World Cup?
You get cut because you had an injury,
and all of a sudden you're not good enough.
Next thing you know, you're playing Club soccer for Uruguay.
Uh, we're just trying to play in Saturday's game.
If we forfeit again, we'll be disqualified for the season.
I'm doing you a favor.
The answer is no.
Ooh, ooh, have you been to that, uh, new aerial hoop class?
Oh, yeah. That is an unbelievable work out.
- Isn't it, though? - Mm-hm.
Oh, I've been there, too.
- Ooh! - Some of those moves are killer.
Were you able to do the scissor ankle hang?
Uh, actually, I've only been once,
and I got dizzy. [laughs]
Oh! It's not for everyone, I guess.
But the smoothie place next door is really good.
Have you tried that?
- I'm lactose intolerant. - I don't do sugar.
Yeah, and those smoothies, they are loaded with calories
- despite what they say. - Yeah.
Well, calories aren't everything. [chuckles]
[crunching]
[whistle blows]
Cannon: Nice pass. Now go to goal. Go to goal.
Talk to each other, D!
So far, all I've gotten out of this practice
is a horrible shin guard tan.
All I've gotten is a whiff of your sweaty socks.
Come on. Let's be positive.
- [whistle blows] - [Zoe gasps]
Whistle. See? It's our turn.
Finally.
Cannon: McBride, what's with your shooting?
You're all over the place.
Try planting your foot a little closer to the ball.
Thanks. I'll try that next time.
I got a better idea.
Why don't we try it right now?
[whistle blows]
Let's go.
Go for another goal.
Sorry, ladies.
We'll switch out after this.
This is insane.
Excuse me, Coach Cannon.
Yeah. What is it?
It's just-- Practice is almost over,
and all we've done today are a bunch of agility drills.
Drills are an important part of practice.
But it's not actual practice.
And we have a game Saturday.
You're not the only one with a game coming up.
The boys also have a game.
Listen, I'm sorry you don't have a coach anymore,
but it's my job to lead these boys to victory,
and that's my only job.
But the girls want a chance to win, too.
Well, I've seen you play.
I wouldn't count on a trophy in your future.
Excuse me, but you don't play soccer just for the trophy.
Really? Why else would you do it?
That's why my boys are 5 and 0.
You do it for the love of the game.
That's how you become great.
Then you win championships.
That's very clever.
And you are?
I'm the girls' new coach.
And I'm also the head custodian,
which you would know if you ever turned around
to see who cleans up the mud you track in after practice.
I-- I don't get it.
What made you change your mind?
In my country we have a name
for guys like Coach Cannon:
dictators. Look, I don't know
if you'll get to the World Cup,
but you definitely won't get there without a coach.
Glad you changed your mind, Mr. Rivas.
We will Google how to take care of that Freon for you.
Please stay away from the AC unit.
- [laughter] - Okay.
And I think you can all start
- calling me Coach now. - Coach.
[chatter]
Okay. Let's see what I'm working with.
Okay.
What are you doing sitting out here?
I got tagged out of this round,
so can we just leave?
But they haven't even brought out the cake yet.
I heard it's dairy-free, sugar-free,
and gluten-free. I might as well eat cardboard.
I thought this would be more fun--
you know, a chance for me to make new friends.
Wait.
You wanted me to come to this party
so you could meet new friends?
You're completely using me.
What?
That is-- [scoff] That's crazy.
In fact, I'm upgrading you to ludicrous.
Okay, fine. I did use you.
I'm not proud of it, but there it is.
It's just been difficult for me.
You and Devin have school all day,
and Dad's been busy with his new job,
and I guess I've been feeling a little--
Lonely?
Yeah.
I know it's silly,
but I miss my friends in Connecticut.
It's not silly. I miss my friends, too.
You do?
Of course.
We moved 3,000 miles away.
It's normal.
You just can't force a friendship.
Yeah. [chuckle]
I'm learning that.
And definitely not by dragging your kid
to some party where the cake isn't even edible.
I know. I'm sorry.
I really do feel bad about that.
Well, you could always make it up to me--
You're not getting that photo lens.
Darn it.
But we can leave now
and go get a couple smoothies.
You had me at we could leave now.
[chuckle]
[whistle blows]
You, who never picks up her pudding cups,
let's get you to left forward.
New girl, you're speedy. You go center midfield.
Tweedle Dum and Tweedle Dee, we need to separate you two.
But we're friends.
That's good for you.
Now who's the coach?
Separate.
Sharon?
Kate, hi.
Bailey, this is Cody McBride's mom.
Remember I told you we met
when I was handing out my business cards?
I had no idea you worked here.
Actually, I'm the owner.
- Oh. - It used to be a cupcake shop
until everyone turned on gluten.
Oh. I love your smoothies.
I'm actually addicted to your Razzle Dazzle Raspberry.
I'm a traditionalist.
Strawberry, banana,
maybe some kiwi if I'm feeling adventurous.
[chuckle]
So how are you liking California so far?
It's nice, good.
The weather's always great,
and there's, uh, lots of predictability,
lots of sun.
It's okay. It took me a couple of years
to get used to it, too.
I'm from Minneapolis.
Us transplants, we got to stick together.
- I know. We do. - Mm-hmm.
I'm going to go get some water.
You two take this opportunity to chat,
get to know each other.
Okay.
[Rivas whistling]
So what did you think?
You girls need a lot of work.
But I also see a lot of potential.
Devin, narrating: Finally,
we were a legitimate team with a legitimate coach.
This time it seemed like it was one step forward
and no steps back.
And it felt good.
Unfortunately, I also see some weak links.
So, if I'm going to coach this team,
changes have to be made.
See you tomorrow.
Don't forget to pick up your trash.
Uh-oh.
Maybe I spoke too soon.
โชโช
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