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Original subtitles

[]

[SPEAKING INDISTINCTLY]

[TYRES SCREECHING]

[EXPLODES]

[]

[BELL RINGING]

MAN: Merry Christmas.

Ho, ho, ho.

Merry Christmas.

Help the poor.

Pennies for the poor.

Help the needy.

Merry Christmas.

Ho, ho, ho.

I got it! I got it!

Nope. Come on, you can tell me.

It's only a couple days till Christmas.

There's nothing to tell, Starsk. Nothing to tell.

You really want me to believe you got me nothing for Christmas?

I didn't.

Hey, look, it's nothing personal.

It's just that this year, for the first time, I decided I was not gonna get caught up

in that phoney wave of euphoric sentimentalism

orchestrated by the clanging of cash registers.

Euphoric sentimentalism? That's right.

It's the principle of the thing.

You know, I get sick and tired of people walking up to me, people I don't even know,

and wishing me a Merry Christmas. Don't you?

No. Well, they don't mean it.

I mean, 51 weeks out of the year, they'd rather take your head off

or run you down with their cars, and then suddenly, one week before Christmas,

everybody's caught up in that phoney wave of...

Euphoric sentimentalism.

That's right. Well, not this kid. No, sir, not me.

I'm not gonna be any pinup boy for the Better Business Bureau.

A sweater. You got me a sweater.

The one I saw... Starsky, I did not get you a sweater.

Oh.

DISPATCHER: All units. All units in the vicinity

of 101 South Main, a 211 in progress.

This is Zebra 3. We are responding.

This time you're going to get it.

This time you're going to jail.

You called in an armed robbery on a kid?

Yeah. And what's wrong with being a kid?

You see what she is, huh? She hangs around and rips me off.

Cold cuts, peanuts... GIRL: He's a liar!

Don't you call me a liar. Liar, liar, liar!

Hey.

Hey!

[CLEARS THROAT]

What do you wanna do? What do you mean:

"What do you wanna do?" I'm telling you, she's been ripping me off.

And I'm not the only shopkeeper who will identify her.

You, stay out of this.

I'll take care of it.

You got anything to say?

Stick it in your ear!

Ow!

Why don't you handle this one, I took care of the last big bust.

You ever been busted before?

Do that again.

Coated tongue, huh?

Coated black.

My guess, it's either liquorice or the Black Plague.

We're gonna have to close you down, Mike.

Panic in the streets. Come on, Dillinger.

Congratulations, Mike. You'll get the Chamber of Commerce

Spirit of Christmas Award for this.

STARSKY: We give you the law in action! Hey, come back here!

[YELLING]

Come on, let me go!

Where you taking me, you gestapo creep?

Where else? The torture chamber.

[BOOING]

All right, break it up!

MAN: Break it up. Break it up.

All right, what's your name?

Hey, you play ball? Me too.

Now, what's that? Your Barnaby Jones act?

Don't try to con me, turkey.

Okay.

We'll take you home.

Where do you live?

Oh, come on. It's two days before Christmas. Nobody wants to lock you up.

Well, Starsk, I guess we'd better go on down to the station and book her.

I guess so.

560 South Main.

[]

Merry Christmas.

[STARSKY WHISTLES "WE WISH YOU A MERRY CHRISTMAS"]

Who do you live with? My dad.

He ain't gonna like you guys being here when he gets back.

Where is he?

Out looking for work. This late in the afternoon?

How old are you, anyway? Eleven? Twelve?

I'm almost a teenager.

Hey, what are you doing? This all the food you usually have?

Well, what do you expect in this neighbourhood?

A 20-pound turkey? I told you, he's out looking for work.

It's not like it looks.

He means to buy food.

Sometimes he forgets and he gets to drinking.

You a lefty?

Hey, some of the greatest ball players were lefty.

You know, you're really corny.

Oh. That's a nice glove. Can I see it?

Hey, you really got this thing broken in, huh?

You a lefty too? Yep.

"Molly. Pete."

You Molly?

Pete your boyfriend? I'm Pete.

Oh, I see. You're Molly or Pete.

Whichever you wanna be, huh? Just Pete.

I'm telling you, you better get out of here.

If it's all the same to you, I think we'll just wait for your dad.

He isn't gonna like it.

[]

Keep your money right where it is, baby.

Hey. Hey, everybody, Roy. It's my party!

When we drink up everything that Roy has here,

we'll move on down the street.

Hey, Nick. Hey, man. What are you drinking?

Fix them up, Roy. Let's go to a booth, huh?

Duran.

Been a long time.

Hey, Flent.

Two years and six months, right?

We heard you was out, Nick.

Come on. The booth.

We been looking for you.

Yeah, well, I been looking for you guys too.

Couldn't have been looking too hard. You been out two months, huh?

Well, I got responsibilities.

You guys remember my daughter?

Guess you don't.

Yeah, you ought to see her. She's 12. Cute little thing. Tough.

Where are the stones, Nick?

First thing I did when I got out of the slammer

was to spring her from the foster home.

Now we're both out. I asked you about the diamonds, Nick.

We're supposed to split three ways.

Don't worry. They're just as safe as can be.

Except for that little itty-bitty one.

I have to have some walking-around money

so I fenced off that little bitty one.

It's your share.

Where are the other stones, Nick? Look, they're safe.

Let's go get them, hm?

Now? Now.

Yeah, well, guess there's no time like the present, as they always say.

Hey, everybody.

Keep feeding them, Roy. Hey, you guys, I'll be right back.

Don't go away. Keep drinking. MAN: Okay.

[]

You fool! What'd you have to shoot him for?

He doesn't have them on him. He doesn't have them on him!

Come on. Let's get out of here.

Oh, I like this guy. He's incredible.

[PHONE RINGS]

You ever see him pitch?

Hello.

Yes, Peggy?

I'll be right there.

That was my dad's girlfriend.

Something about he's hurt or something.

She give you an address?

Alley on Main between Third and Marshall.

[]

[SIREN WAILING]

What happened? Some bum.

Two shots in the back. Must have been killed instantly.

What was the hassle? Robbery? This part of town, who knows?

Unfortunately, except for her, who cares?

[]

[SIRENS WAIL]

You're invited too.

No, come on, Hutch. If the Williams aren't home,

they're probably away for the holidays. I have no choice.

Come on, Perkowitz, it's two days before Christmas.

Now, how can you put a kid like that into juvie?

What you're suggesting is highly irregular.

Well, so is being a little girl alone,

waiting for your father to come home.

What is it? Hot chocolate.

Come on. Take it. It's good for you.

Make a pitcher out of you.

Old Lady Perkowitz ain't having much luck farming me out.

Old Lady Perkowitz is trying to find the people who used to be your foster parents.

The Williams? Mm-hm.

I think she's wasting her time. Why is that?

After they lost me, they probably went back to their old line of business.

Which was? Running a concentration camp.

Couldn't have been as bad as all that.

You know, my dad was a good guy.

Yeah.

Get them? They're not at home.

Juvie, huh?

No, Molly, I'm afraid it's too late to get you booked into juvie tonight.

Officer Hutchinson has agreed to let you stay at his place.

Yeah?

Come on, Molly... Uh, Pete.

Okay. See you, tiger.

Yeah. That's what I like.

A man who's able to resist the euphoric sentimentalism of the season.

Okay, Perkowitz, what say we go "bah" a few humbugs together?

[GROWLS]

Oh!

Here, you can use this to sleep in, huh?

Follow me. I'll show you where the bathroom is.

Oh, you know what I forgot? I forgot your toothbrush.

We can pick up your gear tomorrow. Now, look, I got clean towels...

Hutch. What?

All that stuff about being too late for juvie,

Old Lady Perkowitz just said that, didn't she?

Yeah, I guess she did.

You know something, when I don't have a toothbrush, you know what I do?

Take a little toothpaste here on the tip of my finger and then:

Well, you do whatever you want to.

How come you did it? What?

Oh, uh...

I just thought that juvie was a pretty crummy place to have to stay.

Well, you don't even know me. What do you care for?

I don't know. It's Christmas.

Seemed like a good idea at the time.

[]

Welcome.

[MOLLY CRYING SOFTLY]

[LAUGHING]

Tell me something.

Why'd you have to go and kill the guy, hm?

I wasn't trying to kill him. I was aiming at his legs.

You know something? You know everything about weapons

except how to shoot them. Hey, hey.

We'll find the stones.

He's got to have them in his room someplace.

As soon as it cools off, we can check it.

Patience.

Gotta have patience.

He kept... He kept talking about his daughter.

Sure, she'll know where they are.

Come on, man. Relax. We'll find them.

Sure. Sure. Relax, man.

We'll find them. Right?

Go on. Here.

We'll find them.

[]

[WHISTLING]

Come on, Molly. Cheer up, huh?

What's that? This?

It's a concoction I whip up every morning.

Hey, what do you want for breakfast, huh?

I have granola, and I have wheat germ, and I've got All-Bran,

and I got Coconut Stripes, and I...

And I got some Blackstrap Squares. Hm?

What's in that?

Most of the above, and some vitamins and minerals.

You're really weird, aren't you? You got any salami?

For breakfast? Yeah.

Oh, Molly, that stuff will kill you.

Here, have some of this stuff.

It's good for you.

[KNOCKING]

KIKO: Hey, Hutch! Hi, Kiko. Come on in. Door's open.

Say hello to Pete.

Pete?

Yeah, Pete.

Hi, Pete. Hi.

Want some breakfast? No, thanks.

Just had some huevos rancheros.

Oh, you play ball? No, I wear it to keep my hand warm.

Anyone tell you it's still football season?

Football stinks. You have to be a gorilla to play it.

[SINGING "DECK THE HALLS"]

Hey, you got a tree. Neat.

Yeah. Just the kind of thing you put presents under.

Not if there aren't any presents to put under it.

Yeah. Who cares?

Women. Who can understand them? Good point.

What's wrong with her?

Perkowitz called half an hour ago. Well, what'd she want?

Said she was wrong about the Williams being gone for the holidays.

They're coming back this afternoon. We're gonna have to take her over there.

Oh, that's too bad.

I thought we could have a party tomorrow morning.

Open up presents, you know?

I got a partial make on her father.

Ex-con, out two months. Spent most of his time in skid row bars.

As usual, nobody knows anything.

You didn't make her eat any of this stuff.

You're heartless.

Does she know anything? You sure?

Look, maybe she doesn't want to go to see her foster parents,

but it's a damn sight better than juvie.

We'll stop by the hotel and pick up her things, huh?

Hey, uh, you don't have any salami or something, huh?

When are they burying Edwards? This afternoon at 1.

Listen, his kid will be there. We ought to go down and try to get her.

[PHONE RINGS]

Yeah? MAN: Cops on the way back.

Cops. Come on!

[]

I got him!

Look out, Hutch!

Get a look at them? No.

Molly!

I should have brought flowers.

[ENGINE STARTS]

I won't go.

You have to, Molly. No.

Well, it's here with the Williams or back to juvie.

I hate them.

Why can't I stay with you, Hutch?

I wish you could, Molly. It's just not possible.

I'm a bachelor, and I'm hardly ever there.

You need a family, Molly. Someone to be there

when you get home, you know, and someone to...

cook for you.

Anyway, they wouldn't... They wouldn't allow it.

Who's "they"?

You know who they are.

Now, come on, huh?

Come on.

Hey.

What's that?

Call it euphoric sentimentalism.

Uh...

Well, buy yourself some candy canes.

Let's go.

[DOORBELL RINGS]

"Oh, Molly, my little lamby-pie. You're just as cute as a bug's ear."

Oh, Molly, my little lamby-pie.

I must say, we've been expecting you for hours.

The rest of us are already eating.

But you come in and sit down, and we'Il...

Come on, guys! We'll heat something up.

Isn't she as cute as a bug's ear?

Now, thank the nice policemen for bringing you home.

Why should I? Finks and traitors!

Pete, we'll come back and see you. Yeah, who cares?

Bye.

Boy, that was a rotten thing to do.

Well, look at it this way. At least with Mrs. Williams, she'll get a decent breakfast.

That's not even funny. Don't worry. She'll be fine.

We can come back and see her, right? Sure.

Take her to the movies, the zoo. She'd probably rather go to the fights.

Let's grab her. I told you.

Patience is a virtue. We need time to prepare.

Tomorrow morning will be soon enough.

[]

[DOORBELL RINGS]

Yes? Good morning, dear lady.

My name is Reverend Jonas from the Gospel Mission.

Yes?

The late Mr. Edwards was a member of our congregation,

and he wanted so much for his daughter to be in our Christmas pageant.

Oh, yes. Well, please, come in.

STARSKY: Right like that. That's great. HUTCH: What's happening?

Oh, welcome to euphoric sentimentalism at its grossest.

Yeah, well, uh, listen, I don't want to panic anybody, but I think I saw Captain Dobey in the hallway.

What? Oh, jeez.

Hey, hey. Come here. What?

He was in the elevator, going down.

You really do have a cruel streak in you, don't you?

Mind your own business. What'd you get on Molly's father?

Nicholas Alan Edwards. Smalltime muscle.

Got three years for knocking off a jewellery salesman.

$125,000 worth of diamonds, never recovered.

You call that smalltime?

Well, there were two other guys in on the robbery, and they were never caught.

Same two guys tearing his room apart yesterday.

If they were Molly's dad's partners, she might be able to identify them.

Did you ever think about going into police work as a career?

[STARSKY SINGING " RUDOLPH THE RED-NOSED REINDEER"]

Hey, here's one for you. What?

You know the name of the 12 reindeer that Santa had?

What? Well, how about two?

Oh, I don't know. Donder, Blitzkrieg, Spritzen?

Forget it.

You ought to be ashamed of yourself.

Oh, good morning, gentlemen. Good morning, Mrs. Williams.

Yes, we'd like to see Molly.

Oh, what a shame. She's not here right now.

Oh, well, when will she be back? Probably not until lunchtime.

She just left a few minutes ago.

She's going to be in a children's Christmas pageant.

A friend of her late father came by. He wanted her to be in it so much.

What? Yes. A man of the cloth.

He said his name was Jones, something like that,

and Mr. Edwards was a member of his church, the Gospel Mission.

Which gospel mission?

Oh, isn't that funny? I never thought to ask.

Who ever heard of a children's Christmas pageant

at a gospel mission?

Have faith, my son.

HUTCH: This is Zebra 3. I want an APB out on Molly Edwards, age 12.

Dressed in a blue denim jacket and pants, wearing a baseball cap,

carrying a baseball glove.

Last seen in the Corbin Lake district,

but could be anywhere.

Zebra 3 out.

Don't worry.

We'll find her.

I'm a very patient man, Molly.

I waited a long time for your father to get out of prison.

And now I've waited to get a chance to talk to you.

I want those diamonds.

You can have them.

I don't want them.

Just, please, leave me alone.

[]

Stop! Thief! She robbed the poor box!

She could be anyplace.

We'd better make some more phone calls. Let's go back to the foster home.

We're doing everything we can. We got every cop in the city looking for her.

I know that.

DISPATCHER: Zebra 3. Zebra 3. See the girl at 10271/2 Ocean.

Hey, that's my place.

This is Zebra 3. We read you. We're on our way.

[TIRES SCREECH] [SIREN WAILS]

Molly.

Hi, Hutch. Hi, Starsky.

Kiko. Molly.

Molly. Hey!

"Hey, hey," is that all you can say? You know half the city is out looking for you.

What do you want me to say? I called you.

Yeah.

You okay? Of course I'm all right.

Who was that man that picked you up?

I don't know. Some phoney preacher.

You ever see him before? No.

He's after the diamonds, huh?

Molly.

Do you know where those diamonds are?

No. Would you tell us if you did?

No. I mean I don't know anything about any diamonds...

Molly. Molly, listen.

That phoney preacher who grabbed you may be the same man who killed your father.

Now, if you know anything about those diamonds, you'd better tell us.

I told you, I don't.

I'm not going back to Mrs. Williams', either.

She's not. She told me that before you guys came.

Wouldn't be safe for her anyway. I'm not.

Okay.

Hey, tomorrow is Christmas Eve.

Maybe we ought to have that party again, huh?

I mean, if it wouldn't get in the way of your principles

against the Better Bureau of Business.

I guess not, but I'll tell you one thing. If you're gonna hang around here, there's one thing you're gonna do.

What's that?

[CHUCKLES]

Use soap!

I am.

Wash your face! I am.

Hey, Molly, when you're finished in there,

uh, we'Il... Go Christmas shopping.

We'll go Christmas shopping.

I don't wanna go Christmas shopping. Shh!

I thought that pink dress was very nice.

Pink dresses stink. That's what you said

about the green ones and the red ones and the blue ones.

Molly, we've been to three dress shops already.

Just what is it that you do want?

You really wanna know? Really.

Really, really? Really, really.

Truly, truly? Truly, truly.

[HUMMING]

You know something? We're worse off than when we started.

Got us a miniature Marine.

Will you stop it with that boom, boom, boom.

God!

FLENT: You and your bright ideas.

That suit of yours makes me nervous.

Yeah, well, it didn't make that kid nervous.

Do you think she really knows where those stones are?

She's got to know.

We'll find her. We'll find her.

I'm not kidding. These are the greatest tacos I ever ate.

You never had handmade tortillas before?

No. The ones downtown are crummy.

My mom makes her own tortillas and her own refried beans.

[SPEAKS IN SPANISH]

Now, you try them on, no?

Hey, great!

I don't know if I can shorten that jacket, you know?

No, it's okay. I like the jacket just the way it is. Thanks.

How about another taco, Pete? No, I'd better get on back to Hutch's.

Well, bye, Mrs. Ramos. Bye, Kiko. Bye.

She hasn't got anyone, Mom.

[SPEAKS IN SPANISH]

CAPTAIN: You two gotta do better! I hear you loud and clear, captain.

You don't have to repeat yourself. Right.

I got it. Roger, Wilco, all that jazz. Will do.

Foster home called Dobey and raised hell.

We gotta report to Perkowitz that we got Molly again.

How'd he like his present?

Well, he wasn't too excited with that, either.

[MOLLY CLEARS THROAT]

Look at this. Look at this.

[HUTCH WHISTLES]

Hey, you're gonna pass inspection. Semper fi.

Look at that. Semper fi. Kiko's mom fixed them for me.

She's great, huh? Yeah. Makes the greatest tacos.

You ought to try her enchiladas.

I'm gonna go look at this in a mirror. Yeah, take a look, Pete.

You know, I got a feeling that if she doesn't know where the diamonds are,

somebody might think she does.

Well, we can't keep her with us all the time.

You got any leads on the preacher yet?

Uh, don't you worry about that. We'll find him.

Well, you look worried. Worried?

Look, uh, Pete, Starsky and I have to take off.

So why don't you go on over to Kiko's until we get back, huh? Please?

Yeah, okay. Attakid.

You gonna be okay? Yeah.

Okay.

[]

It's not fair.

It's not fair if they kill my dad.

Yeah, I guess tomorrow would've been a special day for you.

Just probably would've been drunk again.

Well...

he may have had some trouble with his drinking,

but I'm sure he loved you.

No, he didn't.

You've been more of a father to me than he ever was.

Christmas joy.

Hey, Kiko. I need your help. Could you stay at Hutch's house for me?

Why? Where are you going? Fishing.

Without a pole?

What I'm fishing for, all you need is the bait, and that's me.

So Edwards only fenced the one stone.

Mm-hm.

[MUMBLING]

Huggy, what kind of an informer are you with your grunts and your groans?

Give me a straight answer, huh? Let him swallow first.

Just one small stone. But there was these two other dudes

who came into the fence a couple days before Edwards.

Yeah, what did they want? They wanted Edwards.

They told the fence, if Edwards came in, to call.

Did you get a number?

Did I get a number?

Here. The Singapore Bar.

There's nothing on this paper, Huggy.

Thank you.

What was supposed to happen there?

Well, the fence was just supposed to call The Singapore

and tell the bartender that the trick had arrived.

You know the Singapore Bar is about a half a block away from where Edwards was killed?

That's right. Thanks, Hug.

Have a little something extra for your Christmas stocking.

My man. Merry Christmas, Hug.

You didn't have to tip the help. Oh, bah, humbug.

[]

Merry Christmas, J.J.

How you doing, kid? Okay.

This is J.J. Over at the hotel.

You said you wanted to know when that kid came back.

[PHONE HANGS UP]

Yeah, what'll it be?

Uh, a little information on a dead man.

One you helped put away.

You fingered Edwards.

To who?

Oh, man. Come on. Will you, please? I haven't fingered anybody.

Get out of here!

Let go.

See what I mean? Who were those two guys?

I don't know their names.

I got a number. What's the number?

It's an apartment building over on Innes.

What's the number? 1403.

Don't go away.

[]

I am not a man who likes to play games.

Now, you've already stretched my patience.

Okay. Now, we're gonna go to our place

because we got all kinds of ways there to make little girls talk.

Okay, okay. I'll take you where they are. Just let me go.

It wouldn't be smart for you to try and trick me again.

I won't, but you'll have to drive me, way out on Ocean.

Come on. Let's go. Let's go!

Hey, you. Who lives here? The guy that has the diamonds.

Go get the key, Kiko. What?

I think Hutch has it. Oh, yeah, yeah. Okay.

Hey, wait. Wait a minute.

Hey, who was that kid? A friend of the guy who lives here.

Look, forget the key.

Where? The ice trays in the refrigerator.

[BEEPS]

DISPATCHER: Zebra 3, Zebra 3. Come in, please.

Zebra 3. Go ahead.

I have an emergency patch-through for you from someone named Kik o.

Go ahead, please. KIKO: Hutch?

Yeah, Kiko? Pete's in trouble at your place.

We're on our way.

[]

[SIREN WAILING]

I warned you about playing games!

There's that kid. Get her in the car. Let's get out of here.

It's flat! Come on, let's get out.

Forget it! No! No!

You want the diamonds? This time, really. Here.

STARSKY: Where you going?

Come on, up you go. Let's go for a walk.

Merry Christmas, Sid.

You know something, Molly? That was a good stall.

Are you all right?

Yeah.

But it wasn't a stall. What?

They're really in here. Hold out your hand.

Look at that. They were my dad's.

The only thing he had left.

You know something?

You saved my life.

Yeah, that's what happens sometimes when people get carried away

with euphoric sentimentalism.

I asked for that one, didn't I?

Between the eyes.

[SINGING "WE WISH YOU A MERRY CHRISTMAS"]

KIKO: Merry Christmas, Hutch.

Oh, that's beautiful, Kiko. Beautiful.

It eats bugs.

Why do I get the feeling the two of you went shopping together?

Well, see, we figured it would be just the thing

to go along with the ant farm Starsky gave you.

You know, in case of an earthquake or something like that,

and the ants got all over your apartment.

This one's for you. What is it?

Well, how you gonna know unless you open it?

See, that one there is Captain Dobey. Yeah.

[HUTCH WHISTLES]

Kind of icky, huh? Yeah.

But I guess it wouldn't hurt to try it on.

Hey, Kiko. If I can really arrange it,

how are you gonna like having Molly for a sister?

I guess a sister's okay. I always wanted a brother, though.

But Pete... I mean, Molly's close enough.

Let's see.

This one's for you.

Me? Yeah.

From Hutch.

Really? Yeah.

I knew it. You know, for a while there, you had me going.

For a while, I thought you really weren't gonna get me anything.

Well, it's not really much, Starsk. I tried to stick to my principles.

Yeah, you old devil.

You know what this is?

This happens to be a clue.

It's gonna tell me where my new caboose to my train set is.

Starsk, before you open it,

merry Christmas, pal.

Merry Christmas.

"A tree has been planted in your name in Westside Park."

Uh-huh. They say it's only about 50 yards from the horseshoe pitch.

That nice?

[]

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