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1
00:00:53,000 --> 00:00:56,069
"Tenderloin
with lobster Risotto"?
2
00:00:56,103 --> 00:00:58,038
Rags loves
his surf and turf.
3
00:00:58,072 --> 00:01:00,040
Just look
at him light up!
4
00:01:02,243 --> 00:01:05,278
Carter, this stuff
is $15 a can!
5
00:01:05,313 --> 00:01:07,447
$15 a can?!
6
00:01:08,617 --> 00:01:09,917
For dog food?!
7
00:01:09,951 --> 00:01:13,520
Gee, I could buy
Claudia a dress with that!
8
00:01:13,555 --> 00:01:15,689
Well, rags is worth
every penny.
9
00:01:15,724 --> 00:01:19,025
Now, if you'll excuse me,
we're gonna go take a walk
10
00:01:19,060 --> 00:01:21,428
so he can generate
some saliva.
11
00:01:21,463 --> 00:01:23,263
15 bucks a can.
12
00:01:23,298 --> 00:01:28,669
What could possibly be worth
15 bucks a can?
13
00:01:31,105 --> 00:01:32,673
Wow.
14
00:01:32,707 --> 00:01:35,709
You can actually see
little bits of lobster.
15
00:01:56,313 --> 00:01:58,114
Might want to crack
an egg in there.
16
00:01:59,349 --> 00:02:01,984
Makes your coat
nice and shiny.
17
00:02:01,986 --> 00:02:03,552
[ACOUSTIC GUITAR PLAYS]
18
00:02:28,511 --> 00:02:30,679
Sir, you need to see
this new commercial
19
00:02:30,713 --> 00:02:32,581
from the
Michael lauman campaign.
20
00:02:32,615 --> 00:02:34,984
I gotta warn you...
you're not gonna like it,
21
00:02:35,018 --> 00:02:39,054
at least not as much
as "the real world uncensored."
22
00:02:40,189 --> 00:02:42,992
The alcoholic girl
takes her shirt off.
23
00:02:50,700 --> 00:02:53,568
[CROWD CHEER]
24
00:02:53,603 --> 00:02:57,139
MAN: Is this really who you wantrepresenting you in Washington?
25
00:02:57,174 --> 00:02:59,475
Paid for by the Michael laumnfor senate campaign.
26
00:02:59,509 --> 00:03:01,877
Of course,
they use the cotton candy.
27
00:03:01,912 --> 00:03:04,046
What about the hot dog,
the nachos?
28
00:03:04,080 --> 00:03:06,381
I ate those so well,
people cheered!
29
00:03:07,717 --> 00:03:09,051
They're gonna run the spot,
30
00:03:09,085 --> 00:03:11,087
so we gotta come up
with a response.
31
00:03:11,121 --> 00:03:13,289
Mike, this is my job,
and I will take care of it.
32
00:03:13,323 --> 00:03:15,891
I say we hit back hard and
below the belt where it counts.
33
00:03:15,925 --> 00:03:17,392
Again and again
and again!
34
00:03:18,728 --> 00:03:20,029
Don't you agree?
35
00:03:20,063 --> 00:03:22,398
I'm certainly
not gonna disagree.
36
00:03:26,470 --> 00:03:29,004
He really crossed a line
with this ad,
37
00:03:29,038 --> 00:03:32,241
and we have to respond with
something equally provocative.
38
00:03:32,275 --> 00:03:33,742
Here's an ad age article
39
00:03:33,776 --> 00:03:36,012
on the top 10
commercial directors.
40
00:03:36,046 --> 00:03:39,081
Wait a minute, why are the top
two on the list crossed off?
41
00:03:39,116 --> 00:03:41,517
Oh, well, trust me.
You can't get those guys.
42
00:03:41,551 --> 00:03:43,119
Ah ha.
I can get anyone.
43
00:03:43,153 --> 00:03:46,622
Well, that guy's dead.
44
00:03:46,656 --> 00:03:48,457
Okay, he could be tough.
45
00:03:48,492 --> 00:03:51,627
Well, what about this guy,
this Trevor wolf?
46
00:03:51,661 --> 00:03:54,330
Oh, no, no, not him.
We don't want him.
47
00:03:54,364 --> 00:03:55,564
Why not?
48
00:03:55,598 --> 00:03:57,333
Well, he's not right.
49
00:03:57,367 --> 00:03:59,668
He's... Way out of our league.
50
00:03:59,702 --> 00:04:02,604
Caitlin, you stilldon't understand
51
00:04:02,638 --> 00:04:05,640
how much power
I wield in this town.
52
00:04:05,675 --> 00:04:08,543
I want to get somethin' done,
it gets done,
53
00:04:08,578 --> 00:04:10,012
no questions asked.
54
00:04:10,046 --> 00:04:13,381
Janelle, get me Trevor wolf's
agent on the phone.
55
00:04:13,416 --> 00:04:14,383
Not now.
56
00:04:15,952 --> 00:04:17,986
I don't know.
57
00:04:18,021 --> 00:04:20,656
Can't you just call back?
58
00:04:20,690 --> 00:04:23,492
She's on a pay phone.
59
00:04:23,494 --> 00:04:25,727
Put her on hold.
60
00:04:25,762 --> 00:04:27,596
I could.
61
00:04:27,630 --> 00:04:31,099
Not going to.
62
00:04:31,133 --> 00:04:34,336
Okay, thanks.
Sorry, janelle.
63
00:04:34,371 --> 00:04:35,737
She's all over it.
64
00:04:39,309 --> 00:04:42,278
Hey, Nikki, listen... do I have
something on my cheek?
65
00:04:42,312 --> 00:04:44,913
I'm feeling some irritation,
some itchiness.
66
00:04:44,948 --> 00:04:47,682
Oh, yeah, it looks like some
kind of allergic reaction.
67
00:04:47,717 --> 00:04:50,518
Did you eat anything out
of the ordinary this morning?
68
00:04:50,553 --> 00:04:51,653
No.
69
00:04:51,687 --> 00:04:54,289
Oh, wait, wait.
Does dog food count?
70
00:04:54,323 --> 00:04:55,290
Paul!
71
00:04:55,324 --> 00:04:56,491
Oh, God.
72
00:04:56,525 --> 00:04:58,861
Oh, God,
is it getting worse?
73
00:04:58,895 --> 00:05:03,398
Oh, no,
but your breath is!
74
00:05:03,432 --> 00:05:06,534
Jeez, chew a milk-bone
or something, will you?
75
00:05:06,569 --> 00:05:08,003
Oh, God,
I can't have a rash.
76
00:05:08,037 --> 00:05:09,604
I'm going
on "the view" tomorrow
77
00:05:09,639 --> 00:05:11,606
to talk about
the campaign commercials.
78
00:05:11,641 --> 00:05:13,742
This is a glamour business!
79
00:05:13,777 --> 00:05:16,511
This face puts food
on my table!
80
00:05:16,546 --> 00:05:18,614
And then, it sucks it
right back up!
81
00:05:20,650 --> 00:05:21,650
Sorry I'm late.
82
00:05:21,685 --> 00:05:22,984
What happened?
83
00:05:23,019 --> 00:05:25,687
The ladder fell and you couldn't
get out of the bunk bed?
84
00:05:25,722 --> 00:05:28,157
No, no, no,
I have a slide now.
85
00:05:28,191 --> 00:05:29,791
I couldn't wake up.
86
00:05:29,825 --> 00:05:32,060
I was having
this incredibly vivid dream
87
00:05:32,094 --> 00:05:34,396
I was an astronaut
blasting off into space.
88
00:05:34,430 --> 00:05:36,431
You ever have
a dream like that?
89
00:05:36,465 --> 00:05:37,432
No.
90
00:05:37,466 --> 00:05:39,868
I don't have gay dreams.
91
00:05:39,902 --> 00:05:42,671
It wasn't a gay dream.
It was a space dream.
92
00:05:42,705 --> 00:05:44,072
James, think about it.
93
00:05:44,107 --> 00:05:46,809
You got into a rocket
filled with buff guys,
94
00:05:46,843 --> 00:05:50,078
and you went to the moon
so you could have hot man sex
95
00:05:50,113 --> 00:05:52,347
without your parents
finding out.
96
00:05:56,219 --> 00:05:58,387
Wait a minute, Stuart,
I'm not gay.
97
00:05:58,421 --> 00:06:01,223
Fine, why don't we do
a little psychological test?
98
00:06:01,258 --> 00:06:04,927
I say a word and you say the
first word that comes to mind.
99
00:06:04,961 --> 00:06:06,862
Okay.
100
00:06:06,896 --> 00:06:08,763
Super.
Man.
101
00:06:08,798 --> 00:06:09,698
Spider.
Man.
102
00:06:09,732 --> 00:06:10,865
Aqua.
Man.
103
00:06:16,939 --> 00:06:19,241
Mike, why are you going
through all this trouble?
104
00:06:19,276 --> 00:06:21,410
Because Caitlin said
I couldn't get this guy
105
00:06:21,444 --> 00:06:22,444
to do her commercial.
106
00:06:22,478 --> 00:06:23,845
You're always showing off.
107
00:06:23,880 --> 00:06:25,447
Like when you made
fun of her yoga,
108
00:06:25,482 --> 00:06:28,050
and she said, "you can't get
your legs behind your head."
109
00:06:28,084 --> 00:06:30,185
I did it, didn't I?
110
00:06:30,220 --> 00:06:32,554
Yes, and the paramedics
were very impressed.
111
00:06:34,557 --> 00:06:36,859
Carter, let me explain
something to you, okay?
112
00:06:36,893 --> 00:06:38,327
Right now, to Caitlin,
113
00:06:38,329 --> 00:06:40,862
I am just another
handsome, successful guy
114
00:06:40,897 --> 00:06:43,265
who can put his legs
behind his head.
115
00:06:43,300 --> 00:06:46,134
But if I get this Trevor
to do our commercial,
116
00:06:46,169 --> 00:06:48,269
well, then, hey,
I'm the man.
117
00:06:48,304 --> 00:06:49,938
Good luck dealing with him.
118
00:06:49,972 --> 00:06:51,807
He's supposed to be
a huge egomaniac.
119
00:06:51,841 --> 00:06:56,578
I can handle egomaniacs. All you
have to do is flatter them.
120
00:06:56,612 --> 00:07:00,182
That is so smart.
Brilliant, actually.
121
00:07:00,216 --> 00:07:03,551
See, you get me.
122
00:07:05,388 --> 00:07:08,056
[BRITISH ACCENT] I'm looking
for a Mike Flaherty.
123
00:07:08,090 --> 00:07:09,892
Hey, I'm a Mike Flaherty.
124
00:07:09,926 --> 00:07:11,826
How are you?
You must be Trevor.
125
00:07:11,861 --> 00:07:13,161
This is Carter Heywood.
126
00:07:13,196 --> 00:07:14,229
Oh, thank you.
127
00:07:14,264 --> 00:07:15,764
I'm sorry I'm late.
128
00:07:15,798 --> 00:07:18,400
Bloody hate this town.
It's a poor man's London.
129
00:07:18,435 --> 00:07:20,602
Well, you know,
Trevor, uh...
130
00:07:20,636 --> 00:07:23,572
Sometimes I bloody hate
this town, too.
131
00:07:23,606 --> 00:07:26,608
You know
what I bloody loved?
132
00:07:26,642 --> 00:07:29,010
Your Ty-d-bol commercial.
133
00:07:29,044 --> 00:07:31,346
Oh, I was a whore
to do that ad.
134
00:07:31,381 --> 00:07:33,715
No, my real passion's
my movies.
135
00:07:33,749 --> 00:07:36,184
Really? I haven't
seen any of those.
136
00:07:36,219 --> 00:07:39,421
Ah, it's because
they're all in my head.
137
00:07:39,455 --> 00:07:41,089
Really, you know,
138
00:07:41,124 --> 00:07:44,426
a lot of directors now are
putting their movies on film.
139
00:07:44,460 --> 00:07:46,461
My movies are
too insane for film!
140
00:07:46,495 --> 00:07:48,229
You know what
my problem is?
141
00:07:48,264 --> 00:07:50,732
Uh, crazy movies
in your head?
142
00:07:50,766 --> 00:07:54,536
No, I'm a genius, which means
people rarely understand me.
143
00:07:54,570 --> 00:07:55,971
Oh, I'm sure.
144
00:07:56,005 --> 00:07:58,340
But I must say,
for such a brilliant man,
145
00:07:58,374 --> 00:08:00,776
you really know how
to put people at ease.
146
00:08:00,810 --> 00:08:03,812
You know what?
You get me.
147
00:08:05,781 --> 00:08:09,685
James, you left
a message on my voice mail,
148
00:08:09,719 --> 00:08:12,220
something about being gay?
149
00:08:12,254 --> 00:08:14,723
Oh, false alarm.
I had one gay space dream.
150
00:08:14,757 --> 00:08:16,125
But last night, nothing.
151
00:08:16,159 --> 00:08:17,625
So, you know... straight.
152
00:08:17,660 --> 00:08:22,530
I'm here if you wanna talk
because, you know... gay.
153
00:08:22,565 --> 00:08:25,600
You're a good friend,
Carter.
154
00:08:27,470 --> 00:08:29,738
Aw, yeah!
155
00:08:31,307 --> 00:08:33,608
Whoa!
156
00:08:36,513 --> 00:08:38,480
Something the matter?
157
00:08:38,515 --> 00:08:41,550
I had a dream
where I kissed Carter.
158
00:08:41,584 --> 00:08:43,718
I'm starting to worry.
159
00:08:43,752 --> 00:08:47,122
You shou be worried.
160
00:08:47,156 --> 00:08:50,658
Worried about
making me jealous.
161
00:08:54,096 --> 00:08:57,266
Okay, two dreams
doesn't mean I'm gay.
162
00:08:57,300 --> 00:09:00,302
That's what you think,
sugar lips.
163
00:09:03,806 --> 00:09:06,908
I'm gay.
164
00:09:08,110 --> 00:09:10,312
Whoa, whoa, whoa,
easy with that stuff.
165
00:09:10,346 --> 00:09:12,781
I can't believe I let you
talk me into this.
166
00:09:12,815 --> 00:09:14,816
Technically, you begged me.
167
00:09:14,850 --> 00:09:17,653
I asked you if there was
any skin-colored cream
168
00:09:17,687 --> 00:09:20,088
or powder
to disguise facial blemishes.
169
00:09:20,122 --> 00:09:22,491
You're the one
who took it to makeup.
170
00:09:22,525 --> 00:09:25,327
There, pretty as a...
171
00:09:25,362 --> 00:09:26,995
Done.
172
00:09:27,029 --> 00:09:30,733
Oh, I can't wear makeup.
173
00:09:30,767 --> 00:09:32,835
Better wash this off.
174
00:09:32,869 --> 00:09:34,636
Hey, Paul,
you look great.
175
00:09:34,670 --> 00:09:36,204
Did you lose some weight?
176
00:09:36,239 --> 00:09:38,640
Yes.
177
00:09:38,674 --> 00:09:41,309
Yes, I did.
178
00:09:41,344 --> 00:09:45,514
Five minutes, my office...
bring the blush.
179
00:09:45,548 --> 00:09:46,849
You just sign here...
180
00:09:46,883 --> 00:09:49,284
Trevor wolf,
the ungettable director...
181
00:09:49,319 --> 00:09:51,387
[CHUCKLES]
182
00:09:51,421 --> 00:09:53,221
...and I will sign here...
183
00:09:53,255 --> 00:09:56,725
Mike Flaherty,
the guy who got him.
184
00:09:56,760 --> 00:10:00,128
Get Caitlin, the woman who's
gonna be incredibly impressed.
185
00:10:02,064 --> 00:10:03,899
Caitlin Moore's
our campaign manager.
186
00:10:03,933 --> 00:10:06,368
Caitlin Moore is
running this campaign?
187
00:10:06,402 --> 00:10:07,436
Yeah, you know her?
188
00:10:07,470 --> 00:10:09,538
I should say so.
189
00:10:09,572 --> 00:10:10,873
We were married.
190
00:10:10,907 --> 00:10:15,010
You... you were married?
191
00:10:15,044 --> 00:10:16,244
Hitched!
192
00:10:16,278 --> 00:10:18,179
Yes, we had a whole
ball and chain.
193
00:10:18,214 --> 00:10:19,748
We were knocking boots.
194
00:10:19,782 --> 00:10:21,483
It was all legal, baby.
195
00:10:23,887 --> 00:10:25,721
Caitie!
196
00:10:25,755 --> 00:10:26,889
Trevor!
197
00:10:26,923 --> 00:10:28,490
[LAUGHS]
198
00:10:30,226 --> 00:10:31,993
Can you hold this?
199
00:10:32,027 --> 00:10:35,830
I'm just gonna put my legs
behind my head.
200
00:10:48,510 --> 00:10:50,411
Can't wait
to get started.
201
00:10:50,446 --> 00:10:52,280
Oh, this is unbelievable.
202
00:10:52,315 --> 00:10:54,415
I am so excited
about this.
203
00:10:54,450 --> 00:10:55,617
Oh, you're great.
204
00:10:55,652 --> 00:10:57,786
No, you're great.
205
00:11:01,290 --> 00:11:04,292
You idiot!
206
00:11:04,327 --> 00:11:05,627
What?!
207
00:11:05,661 --> 00:11:07,595
How could you hire
my ex-husband?!
208
00:11:07,629 --> 00:11:10,431
Oh, I'm sorry. I forgot to ask
that standard question...
209
00:11:10,466 --> 00:11:14,236
"have you ever been married
to our campaign manager?"
210
00:11:14,270 --> 00:11:16,671
I'm hiring a new custodian
this afternoon.
211
00:11:16,705 --> 00:11:18,974
You got anything
you wanna get off your chest?
212
00:11:19,008 --> 00:11:21,042
What are youso upset about?
213
00:11:21,077 --> 00:11:24,445
How could you not tell me
that you were married?
214
00:11:24,480 --> 00:11:26,681
Since when are we sharing
our personal lives?
215
00:11:26,715 --> 00:11:28,883
I tell you everythingabout my personal life!
216
00:11:28,918 --> 00:11:31,653
Mike, you don't
have a personal life.
217
00:11:31,687 --> 00:11:33,488
Hey, I went out last Friday.
218
00:11:33,523 --> 00:11:34,222
With Carter.
219
00:11:34,257 --> 00:11:36,591
And his mom.
220
00:11:36,625 --> 00:11:39,627
How can you be married
to this guy?
221
00:11:39,662 --> 00:11:41,129
I mean, he is such a...
222
00:11:41,164 --> 00:11:43,465
he's a... he is a...
he's a...
223
00:11:43,499 --> 00:11:46,567
he's a tool.
224
00:11:46,602 --> 00:11:48,002
I was young.
225
00:11:48,037 --> 00:11:50,638
I was working in London,
and he swept me off my feet.
226
00:11:50,672 --> 00:11:53,241
Oh, this is gonna be
so awkward for me!
227
00:11:53,276 --> 00:11:56,077
Tell you what...
I'm just gonna fire him.
228
00:11:56,112 --> 00:11:57,879
No, no, no, no.
You can't do that.
229
00:11:57,914 --> 00:11:59,180
I'll be fine.
230
00:11:59,215 --> 00:12:01,149
I'll keep things
professional this time.
231
00:12:01,183 --> 00:12:03,818
What do you mean,
"this time"?
232
00:12:03,852 --> 00:12:06,388
Well, the last time
we saw each other,
233
00:12:06,589 --> 00:12:07,922
we kind of... you know.
234
00:12:07,957 --> 00:12:10,058
Eww!
235
00:12:14,530 --> 00:12:16,497
Oh, where'd you
get that stuff?
236
00:12:16,532 --> 00:12:18,666
Macy's.
237
00:12:20,403 --> 00:12:24,005
How can I bring out
my eyes more?
238
00:12:24,040 --> 00:12:26,007
Well, women
use eyeliner for that.
239
00:12:26,042 --> 00:12:28,443
Cough it up.
240
00:12:28,477 --> 00:12:32,481
I said, "womenuse eyeliner for that."
241
00:12:32,515 --> 00:12:34,983
You can't believe
the compliments I'm getting.
242
00:12:35,017 --> 00:12:36,351
When I'm on "the view" today,
243
00:12:36,386 --> 00:12:38,720
I'm gonna have those women
eating out of my...
244
00:12:38,754 --> 00:12:40,155
Dog dish?
245
00:12:42,591 --> 00:12:45,394
Hey, Paul, did you hear?
246
00:12:46,729 --> 00:12:49,597
I'm gay.
247
00:12:49,631 --> 00:12:53,501
Am I the only real man
left in this office?
248
00:12:57,640 --> 00:13:00,274
James?
What's with the shirt?
249
00:13:00,309 --> 00:13:02,210
Oh, haven't you heard?
250
00:13:02,244 --> 00:13:04,479
I'm out!
Queer and here, fella!
251
00:13:04,514 --> 00:13:07,081
Two dreams,
I'm as gay as they get.
252
00:13:07,116 --> 00:13:09,083
No, you're not.
253
00:13:09,118 --> 00:13:12,086
Oh, yeah? Then why did
I shave my chest this morning?
254
00:13:12,121 --> 00:13:14,689
I don't know.
255
00:13:14,723 --> 00:13:18,760
James... This is Robert
from accounting.
256
00:13:18,794 --> 00:13:20,862
I thought you two might...
257
00:13:23,065 --> 00:13:24,766
...hit it off.
258
00:13:24,800 --> 00:13:27,636
Robert from accounting,
I hope you play for our team,
259
00:13:27,670 --> 00:13:29,737
because the field
has just been mowed.
260
00:13:33,009 --> 00:13:34,476
Do you hate New York?
261
00:13:34,510 --> 00:13:37,045
Drugs dealers
put me in Washington.
262
00:13:37,079 --> 00:13:39,181
Cut!!
263
00:13:40,616 --> 00:13:43,752
Where the pause lands
is quite critical.
264
00:13:43,786 --> 00:13:46,988
It's, "do you hate
New York drug dealers?
265
00:13:47,023 --> 00:13:48,856
Put in Washington."
266
00:13:51,793 --> 00:13:54,262
That's good, too.
267
00:13:55,898 --> 00:13:58,199
Carter. Mike.
268
00:13:58,234 --> 00:13:59,967
Caitlin.
269
00:14:00,002 --> 00:14:02,704
You look... Beautiful,
elegant.
270
00:14:02,738 --> 00:14:03,605
Why?
271
00:14:03,639 --> 00:14:06,107
What are you
talking about?
272
00:14:06,142 --> 00:14:07,375
Well, look at you.
273
00:14:07,410 --> 00:14:09,277
The dress, the shoes,
your...
274
00:14:09,312 --> 00:14:12,146
your hair is up.
You nev wear your hair up.
275
00:14:12,181 --> 00:14:13,415
I do!
276
00:14:13,483 --> 00:14:15,083
You always
wear it straight.
277
00:14:15,117 --> 00:14:16,451
Sometimes you pull it back
278
00:14:16,486 --> 00:14:18,520
with the little red
scrunchie thing,
279
00:14:18,554 --> 00:14:20,522
a-and last Wednesday...
280
00:14:20,556 --> 00:14:24,625
I have a phenomenal memory
for hair.
281
00:14:24,660 --> 00:14:26,461
Carter?
282
00:14:26,495 --> 00:14:28,430
Bald.
283
00:14:28,464 --> 00:14:30,498
Mike, I know
what you're thinking,
284
00:14:30,533 --> 00:14:32,534
and I did not do thisfor Trevor.
285
00:14:32,568 --> 00:14:35,437
Caitlin, I love it
when you wear your hair up.
286
00:14:35,471 --> 00:14:37,772
Live and learn.
287
00:14:37,806 --> 00:14:40,007
I thought you and I
might grab a bite later
288
00:14:40,042 --> 00:14:42,210
if there's an opening
in your "shedule."
289
00:14:42,244 --> 00:14:43,844
"Shedule."
290
00:14:43,879 --> 00:14:45,413
Schedule.
291
00:14:45,448 --> 00:14:48,383
You could show me what
new yorkers do for "lesure."
292
00:14:48,417 --> 00:14:50,518
Leisure.
293
00:14:50,553 --> 00:14:53,921
It's a hard "e"
this side of the pond, Ringo.
294
00:14:53,956 --> 00:14:56,524
Michael...
295
00:14:56,559 --> 00:14:58,193
It might interest you
to know
296
00:14:58,227 --> 00:14:59,995
that we invented
the language.
297
00:15:00,029 --> 00:15:03,498
Although, to be fair,
you did give us pac-man.
298
00:15:03,533 --> 00:15:06,167
And we can
take that back, pal!
299
00:15:06,201 --> 00:15:07,802
I'm probably crazy,
300
00:15:07,836 --> 00:15:10,672
but do you think
there's a chance
301
00:15:10,706 --> 00:15:13,007
she's fallin' for him again?
302
00:15:13,041 --> 00:15:14,075
I don't know.
303
00:15:14,109 --> 00:15:17,512
Think there's a chance
I'm black?
304
00:15:17,546 --> 00:15:19,481
I'm serious.
305
00:15:19,515 --> 00:15:22,817
I'm picking up
kind of a vibe here.
306
00:15:22,851 --> 00:15:26,288
Yeah, it's called
"raw animal lust."
307
00:15:26,322 --> 00:15:28,990
Remember when I said
that somewhere out there
308
00:15:29,024 --> 00:15:30,492
is a guy just for you?
309
00:15:30,526 --> 00:15:33,428
That's the kind of bull
I'm lookin' for right now!
310
00:15:35,397 --> 00:15:38,032
How'd your date
with Robert go?
311
00:15:38,067 --> 00:15:39,233
I'm not gay.
312
00:15:40,969 --> 00:15:42,870
Hey, uh, trev...
313
00:15:42,905 --> 00:15:48,276
What do you think of this
commercial we're making?
314
00:15:48,310 --> 00:15:50,111
It's a bit
of a "how-do-you-do."
315
00:15:50,145 --> 00:15:52,948
Exactly! It should be
more of a...
316
00:15:52,982 --> 00:15:54,316
a "what's all that, then?"
317
00:15:54,350 --> 00:15:56,050
Exactly.
318
00:15:56,085 --> 00:15:58,553
You know what?
319
00:15:58,588 --> 00:16:00,589
I'm not gonna
handcuff you anymore.
320
00:16:00,623 --> 00:16:03,492
You know those insane movies
you have in your head?
321
00:16:03,526 --> 00:16:05,527
Let's see some of thatin the commercial.
322
00:16:05,561 --> 00:16:06,794
Carte blanche?
323
00:16:06,828 --> 00:16:09,063
Yes. Go nuts. Make art.
324
00:16:09,097 --> 00:16:12,467
If I understand it,
well, then, hey, you failed.
325
00:16:12,501 --> 00:16:14,869
Mike, I think
I've misjudged you.
326
00:16:14,904 --> 00:16:18,640
Do you think the mayor
will do full frontal nudity?
327
00:16:18,674 --> 00:16:21,509
Couldn't hurt to ask.
328
00:16:33,522 --> 00:16:36,625
Welcome back. We are talking
with Paul lassiter,
329
00:16:36,659 --> 00:16:38,459
press secretary
to the mayor of New York.
330
00:16:38,494 --> 00:16:39,727
Paul, thanks for coming.
331
00:16:39,762 --> 00:16:41,730
Thank you for having me.
332
00:16:41,764 --> 00:16:44,866
And may I say that
from where I sit...
333
00:16:44,901 --> 00:16:46,835
The view is just fine.
334
00:16:46,936 --> 00:16:48,335
[LAUGHTER]
335
00:16:48,370 --> 00:16:50,605
Have you seen
these cotton-candy commercials
336
00:16:50,640 --> 00:16:51,873
Michael lauman is running?
337
00:16:51,908 --> 00:16:53,641
What'll the mayor do about that?
338
00:16:53,675 --> 00:16:55,176
The mayor and I feel
339
00:16:55,211 --> 00:16:57,178
that we're not gonna
reduce this campaign
340
00:16:57,212 --> 00:16:58,613
to petty mudslinging.
341
00:16:58,648 --> 00:17:03,317
What we want to do is deal
with the important issues...
342
00:17:03,352 --> 00:17:06,654
how do you get your eyelashes
so full?
343
00:17:06,689 --> 00:17:09,357
Just the way I was born.
344
00:17:09,391 --> 00:17:11,292
Gotcha.
We'll talk later.
345
00:17:11,327 --> 00:17:14,062
I think that the mayor
ought to strike back
346
00:17:14,096 --> 00:17:17,165
at this lauman character.
347
00:17:17,200 --> 00:17:18,733
To do nothing
makes him look wimpy.
348
00:17:18,768 --> 00:17:23,704
And I think someone is wearing
a little too much Rouge.
349
00:17:23,739 --> 00:17:25,373
What?!
350
00:17:25,408 --> 00:17:26,708
We'll talk later.
351
00:17:27,843 --> 00:17:31,079
You seem
preoccupied with makeup.
352
00:17:31,113 --> 00:17:33,348
[LAUGHS]
That's ridiculous!
353
00:17:33,382 --> 00:17:35,183
[LAUGHING]
354
00:17:35,217 --> 00:17:38,420
Are you wearin'...
he's wearin' eyeliner!
355
00:17:38,454 --> 00:17:40,422
And you have mascara on!
356
00:17:40,456 --> 00:17:42,190
No, no, no!
No, I'm not!
357
00:17:42,224 --> 00:17:44,725
All right, I am!
I'm wearing makeup!
358
00:17:44,760 --> 00:17:47,295
Lots of it!
Why shouldn't I?!
359
00:17:47,329 --> 00:17:50,565
Is it so wrong for a man
360
00:17:50,599 --> 00:17:52,933
to want to accent
his cheekbones,
361
00:17:52,968 --> 00:17:54,735
maybe hide some laugh lines,
362
00:17:54,769 --> 00:17:56,204
and, yes... look sexy?
363
00:17:56,238 --> 00:17:58,072
[APPLAUSE]
364
00:17:58,107 --> 00:17:59,807
Thank you! Thank you!
365
00:17:59,841 --> 00:18:02,243
Why should makeup
only be for women?!
366
00:18:02,277 --> 00:18:04,212
Right! Right!
367
00:18:04,246 --> 00:18:06,781
Why should dog food
only be for dogs?!
368
00:18:08,617 --> 00:18:10,385
Okay, we'll be back
369
00:18:10,419 --> 00:18:13,921
with some home makeover tips
right after this.
370
00:18:13,955 --> 00:18:15,490
Can I stay?
No.
371
00:18:22,064 --> 00:18:23,264
[CLEARS THROAT]
372
00:18:23,298 --> 00:18:25,132
The following
is Trevor wolf's first...
373
00:18:25,167 --> 00:18:27,001
and, I certainly hope,
not only...
374
00:18:27,035 --> 00:18:29,571
campaign commercial
for the mayor's senate run.
375
00:18:29,605 --> 00:18:30,939
Oh, I should say
376
00:18:30,973 --> 00:18:33,508
Trevor had complete
creative control on this,
377
00:18:33,542 --> 00:18:35,810
so what you're about to see
is a window
378
00:18:35,845 --> 00:18:38,112
into his talented,
talented mind.
379
00:18:40,983 --> 00:18:42,517
[INDUSTRIAL MUSIC PLAYS]
380
00:18:42,551 --> 00:18:44,552
MAN: Washington.
381
00:18:45,754 --> 00:18:48,789
Hut! Hut! Hut! Hut!Hut! Hut! Hu!
382
00:18:48,824 --> 00:18:51,392
Hut! Hut! Hu!
383
00:18:54,663 --> 00:18:56,797
[MEOWS]
384
00:18:56,832 --> 00:18:59,133
[WOMAN LAUGH]
385
00:18:59,168 --> 00:19:02,270
Cat got your tongue?
386
00:19:15,617 --> 00:19:19,987
Well, it looks like
the cat has all our tongues.
387
00:19:20,021 --> 00:19:21,389
Two paws up.
388
00:19:21,423 --> 00:19:25,092
Good job, Trevor!
Loved it.
389
00:19:25,126 --> 00:19:26,494
Fire him.
390
00:19:26,528 --> 00:19:29,364
Trevor, uh, this is
the part of the job
391
00:19:29,398 --> 00:19:30,932
that's really tough.
392
00:19:30,966 --> 00:19:33,601
Well, for you.
You're fired.
393
00:19:33,635 --> 00:19:35,870
Fired?
394
00:19:35,904 --> 00:19:40,074
Yeah, fired.
I'm, uh... Sacking you.
395
00:19:40,109 --> 00:19:44,278
Well... Your tea is weak!
396
00:19:46,048 --> 00:19:47,815
You deliberately set him up
397
00:19:47,850 --> 00:19:49,984
just so you could
get rid of him!
398
00:19:50,019 --> 00:19:53,287
Hey, all I do
is give them enough rope.
399
00:19:53,321 --> 00:19:55,256
He tied a clown to it.
400
00:20:05,234 --> 00:20:06,667
How you doin'?
401
00:20:06,702 --> 00:20:09,170
Oh, great.
402
00:20:11,107 --> 00:20:15,910
So, um... You wanna talk about
this whole Caitlin thing?
403
00:20:15,945 --> 00:20:18,979
Wouldn't that...
Be kind of weird?
404
00:20:19,014 --> 00:20:21,215
It's okay, Mike.
We're over.
405
00:20:21,249 --> 00:20:24,786
I've slept with, like,
20 guys since we broke up.
406
00:20:26,188 --> 00:20:28,389
I'm kidding.
407
00:20:28,423 --> 00:20:30,825
[LAUGHS]
408
00:20:30,860 --> 00:20:34,262
That's really...
409
00:20:34,296 --> 00:20:36,931
by how much
are you kidding?
410
00:20:36,965 --> 00:20:39,834
It's so obvious
you have a thing for Caitlin.
411
00:20:39,869 --> 00:20:43,738
You know me
better than anyone else.
412
00:20:43,773 --> 00:20:45,273
I just don't know
what to do.
413
00:20:45,307 --> 00:20:47,441
[SIGHS]
414
00:20:47,476 --> 00:20:48,777
You know, Mike?
415
00:20:48,811 --> 00:20:51,179
Part of the reason
that you and I didn't work out
416
00:20:51,213 --> 00:20:53,614
is because you're always
protecting yourself.
417
00:20:53,649 --> 00:20:55,549
We knew each other
for three years
418
00:20:55,584 --> 00:20:57,285
before you even kissed me.
419
00:20:59,488 --> 00:21:02,356
Just waiting
for the perfect moment.
420
00:21:02,391 --> 00:21:03,591
No such thing.
421
00:21:03,625 --> 00:21:06,194
If you want
the perfect moment,
422
00:21:06,228 --> 00:21:07,862
you got to create it.
423
00:21:07,897 --> 00:21:11,465
I just wouldn't
wait that long with Caitlin.
424
00:21:17,807 --> 00:21:19,874
Thanks, Nik.
425
00:21:31,153 --> 00:21:32,654
I'll give her
another year.
426
00:21:42,397 --> 00:21:43,898
Hey, Stuart.
427
00:21:43,932 --> 00:21:47,234
I think I figured out why
you played that trick on James.
428
00:21:47,269 --> 00:21:48,936
Because
I'm a heartless bastard
429
00:21:48,971 --> 00:21:51,105
who revels
in the misery of innocence?
430
00:21:51,140 --> 00:21:55,175
Maybe you're suppressing certain
gay urges within yourself?
431
00:21:55,210 --> 00:21:57,912
Oh, Carter, shut up.
432
00:21:57,946 --> 00:22:00,014
And kiss me.
433
00:22:05,454 --> 00:22:07,955
MAN: Sit, ubu, sit.
Good dog.
434
00:22:07,989 --> 00:22:09,023
(Barking)
435
00:22:09,073 --> 00:22:13,623
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