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1
00:00:01,111 --> 00:00:03,813
Morning, Nikki. How you doin'?
2
00:00:05,654 --> 00:00:08,355
Come on. I didn't ask
for your whole life story.
3
00:00:09,815 --> 00:00:10,881
Oh, me?
4
00:00:10,864 --> 00:00:13,099
Oh, well... I still
don't have an assistant,
5
00:00:13,024 --> 00:00:15,392
so I had to come in early...
do my own filing.
6
00:00:15,311 --> 00:00:17,412
Takes a little longer,
7
00:00:17,343 --> 00:00:20,146
because I have to sing
the whole song.
8
00:00:22,839 --> 00:00:26,842
A-B-C-D...
9
00:00:26,683 --> 00:00:29,184
E-F-G...
10
00:00:29,098 --> 00:00:31,932
H-I-J-K...
11
00:00:31,829 --> 00:00:33,629
L-M-N-O...
12
00:00:33,576 --> 00:00:35,878
Payroll
13
00:00:38,278 --> 00:00:40,512
so, uh...
14
00:00:40,437 --> 00:00:44,707
About us, uh, everything...
everything cool?
15
00:00:47,997 --> 00:00:51,000
So, I guess I just file
your response under "f."
16
00:00:52,127 --> 00:00:53,494
Look, Nikki, look...
17
00:00:53,461 --> 00:00:56,397
we won't get anywhere
unless we communicate.
18
00:00:56,289 --> 00:00:59,391
You're the worst thing
that's ever happened to me.
19
00:01:00,896 --> 00:01:03,897
Now we're getting
somewhere.
20
00:01:03,785 --> 00:01:07,655
[ACOUSTIC GUITAR PLAYS]
21
00:01:29,930 --> 00:01:31,496
Beat you again, Mike.
22
00:01:31,454 --> 00:01:33,989
Yes, in spite of
your terrible hay fever.
23
00:01:33,901 --> 00:01:36,201
What are the odds
of you sneezing, "miss it!"
24
00:01:36,124 --> 00:01:37,658
Every single time I putted?
25
00:01:37,616 --> 00:01:40,885
I'll let you in
on my winning secret...
26
00:01:40,761 --> 00:01:45,332
treat the ball like your lady,
and she'll dance for you.
27
00:01:45,145 --> 00:01:49,081
Nobody treats their balls
better than you, sir.
28
00:01:52,260 --> 00:01:54,695
So the mayor's still
cheating at golf, huh?
29
00:01:54,612 --> 00:01:57,780
Yeah. Today I'm pretty sure
he even cheated at cheating.
30
00:01:57,660 --> 00:01:59,527
Right, right.
31
00:01:59,440 --> 00:02:00,440
Okay.
32
00:02:00,424 --> 00:02:02,259
Caitlin...
33
00:02:05,317 --> 00:02:08,819
Listen, uh, I don't mind
you using my office,
34
00:02:08,683 --> 00:02:12,319
but next time, just ask first
so I can say no.
35
00:02:12,178 --> 00:02:16,315
Great. High tea at the Plaza.
The mayor will be there.
36
00:02:16,149 --> 00:02:18,950
Okay. How many times
do I have to tell you
37
00:02:18,849 --> 00:02:20,616
to run things by me first?
38
00:02:20,564 --> 00:02:24,167
Let's see. I told you to mind
your own business eight times,
39
00:02:24,027 --> 00:02:25,627
so eight.
40
00:02:25,583 --> 00:02:28,051
Oh, wait...
mind your own business.
41
00:02:27,966 --> 00:02:29,966
Nine.
42
00:02:29,903 --> 00:02:32,605
See, you don't know the mayor
as well as I do.
43
00:02:32,508 --> 00:02:34,208
He can't have tea at the Plaza.
44
00:02:34,160 --> 00:02:35,293
Why?
45
00:02:35,272 --> 00:02:38,474
He can't help
referring to finger foods
46
00:02:38,353 --> 00:02:40,188
as "those little,
gay sandwiches."
47
00:02:40,164 --> 00:02:43,566
By the way, I really enjoyed
your doodle of "supermike"
48
00:02:43,435 --> 00:02:45,737
on the rocket-powered
skateboard.
49
00:02:47,725 --> 00:02:48,825
That's
"ultramike,"
50
00:02:48,804 --> 00:02:50,438
and it's a magic
snowboard,
51
00:02:50,392 --> 00:02:52,594
and, uh, you come by
anytime, okay?
52
00:02:52,521 --> 00:02:54,088
My door is always open.
53
00:02:56,936 --> 00:03:00,005
CARTER: That woman's not wasting
any time getting in your f ace.
54
00:02:59,890 --> 00:03:02,359
Yeah. She's making
her move, Mike.
55
00:03:02,274 --> 00:03:03,807
She's cagey.
56
00:03:03,765 --> 00:03:05,200
She's wily.
57
00:03:05,164 --> 00:03:06,530
She's...
58
00:03:06,498 --> 00:03:09,734
En fuego.
59
00:03:09,611 --> 00:03:12,312
Give her enough rope,
she will hang herself.
60
00:03:12,216 --> 00:03:15,685
Well, she can't do it
soon enough for me.
61
00:03:15,583 --> 00:03:16,983
Oh, come on, Paul.
62
00:03:16,948 --> 00:03:19,617
Yesterday you sucked up
to her so hard,
63
00:03:19,522 --> 00:03:22,324
she had to brace herself
in the doorframe.
64
00:03:22,222 --> 00:03:23,756
Nervous habit.
65
00:03:23,715 --> 00:03:25,315
Under control.
66
00:03:25,271 --> 00:03:28,173
Love
the tie.
67
00:03:28,067 --> 00:03:29,601
All right,
enough about Caitlin.
68
00:03:29,560 --> 00:03:31,461
James, how's that
hospital speech?
69
00:03:31,403 --> 00:03:33,003
Oh, Caitlin took it
away from me.
70
00:03:32,958 --> 00:03:35,260
W-what do you mean
Caitlin took it away from you?
71
00:03:35,182 --> 00:03:36,983
She walked over, took it,
72
00:03:36,929 --> 00:03:39,031
and said, "I'm gonna take
this away from you."
73
00:03:40,933 --> 00:03:43,034
Sir, sir...
74
00:03:44,617 --> 00:03:47,519
did you know that Caitlin
has taken it upon herself
75
00:03:47,412 --> 00:03:49,413
to rewrite
the hospital speech?
76
00:03:49,350 --> 00:03:51,985
She just finished
the first paragraph.
77
00:03:51,891 --> 00:03:52,757
It's so moving.
78
00:03:52,749 --> 00:03:55,885
Let's see...
79
00:03:55,767 --> 00:03:59,136
Cheap anecdote
about a handicapped student...
80
00:03:59,007 --> 00:04:00,475
blah, blah, blah...
81
00:04:00,437 --> 00:04:02,338
blind mother...
82
00:04:02,279 --> 00:04:06,382
yadda, yadda...
tiny wheelchair.
83
00:04:06,218 --> 00:04:07,986
She's a poet, Mike...
84
00:04:07,933 --> 00:04:10,134
A poet!
85
00:04:10,062 --> 00:04:12,296
But the point is,
this speech is city business.
86
00:04:12,222 --> 00:04:14,589
This has nothing to do
with the senate campaign.
87
00:04:14,509 --> 00:04:16,410
Sir, every issue
you talk about as mayor
88
00:04:16,351 --> 00:04:18,386
has the potential
to be a campaign issue.
89
00:04:18,321 --> 00:04:19,888
That's why
I would like to write
90
00:04:19,845 --> 00:04:21,680
all of your speeches
from now on.
91
00:04:21,624 --> 00:04:25,060
And I suppose, what,
we just fire James?
92
00:04:24,928 --> 00:04:28,097
I hate to say it,
but Mike is probably right.
93
00:04:27,978 --> 00:04:29,411
Just like that?
94
00:04:29,375 --> 00:04:30,576
Jeez, Mike!
95
00:04:30,550 --> 00:04:32,952
What do you have,
ice water in your veins?!
96
00:04:32,870 --> 00:04:36,239
Sir, James has really come
into his own.
97
00:04:36,110 --> 00:04:37,710
I'm not paying her
six figures a year
98
00:04:37,666 --> 00:04:39,601
to ignore her opinion.
99
00:04:39,541 --> 00:04:41,942
Sir, you're not paying
me six figures a year - -
100
00:04:41,860 --> 00:04:43,794
actually,
that's the whole sentence.
101
00:04:43,733 --> 00:04:47,403
James has no experience
on the national level.
102
00:04:47,229 --> 00:04:48,929
Well, neither do I.
103
00:04:50,754 --> 00:04:53,356
But let's keep the focus
on James.
104
00:04:53,263 --> 00:04:57,066
If Mike believes in James,
I think he deserves a chance.
105
00:04:56,916 --> 00:04:57,883
You won't be sorry.
106
00:04:57,870 --> 00:04:59,403
James will write a speech
107
00:04:59,362 --> 00:05:02,031
that will blow this one
out of the water.
108
00:05:03,810 --> 00:05:06,378
I just got to show him
what not to do.
109
00:05:11,000 --> 00:05:12,401
Good morning, everyone.
110
00:05:12,366 --> 00:05:14,768
Oh, Caitlin!
I got you some breakfast!
111
00:05:14,686 --> 00:05:16,086
Oh, that's okay, Paul.
112
00:05:16,051 --> 00:05:18,786
I'm on a high-protein...
No-teeth-marks diet.
113
00:05:18,688 --> 00:05:21,790
But your office is the one
on the corner, right?
114
00:05:21,674 --> 00:05:23,542
Correct as always.
115
00:05:23,484 --> 00:05:26,820
As smart
as she is beautiful...
116
00:05:26,694 --> 00:05:27,961
And talented!
117
00:05:27,932 --> 00:05:29,432
The big three...
118
00:05:29,393 --> 00:05:32,429
smart... And beautiful...
119
00:05:32,316 --> 00:05:33,849
And talented!
120
00:05:36,921 --> 00:05:38,856
What?
121
00:05:38,796 --> 00:05:40,297
She walks pretty well
122
00:05:40,257 --> 00:05:43,026
for a woman with your head
up her butt.
123
00:05:42,926 --> 00:05:45,227
That's the way I speak,
all right?
124
00:05:45,149 --> 00:05:47,817
Some people have an accent...
I suck up.
125
00:05:47,722 --> 00:05:49,323
You're pathetic.
126
00:05:49,279 --> 00:05:50,579
Pathetic like a fox!
127
00:05:50,550 --> 00:05:52,818
You know,
they say talk is cheap.
128
00:05:52,741 --> 00:05:54,542
Well, I got news for you...
129
00:05:54,488 --> 00:05:57,089
it's free.
130
00:05:56,998 --> 00:05:59,266
All it costs
is your dignity.
131
00:05:59,189 --> 00:06:01,658
Exactly.
132
00:06:01,572 --> 00:06:03,206
She was asking
about your office
133
00:06:03,160 --> 00:06:04,894
because she's gonna take it
from you.
134
00:06:04,844 --> 00:06:07,111
Oh, God.
135
00:06:07,036 --> 00:06:09,471
Well, fasten
your seat belts, kids,
136
00:06:09,386 --> 00:06:13,155
'cause big daddy's about to make
the jump into hypersuck.
137
00:06:13,008 --> 00:06:15,443
[SUCKING NOISE]
138
00:06:16,311 --> 00:06:18,145
Carter, listen...
139
00:06:18,091 --> 00:06:21,327
I need you
to do me a favor.
140
00:06:21,204 --> 00:06:23,004
I need you
to talk to Nikki for me
141
00:06:22,951 --> 00:06:24,551
because she confides
in you.
142
00:06:24,507 --> 00:06:28,677
Not anymore. She's got some
crazy idea that I'm a gossip.
143
00:06:28,510 --> 00:06:29,577
Why?
144
00:06:29,558 --> 00:06:31,025
Well...
145
00:06:30,987 --> 00:06:33,222
I can tell you this.
146
00:06:33,147 --> 00:06:36,450
Who does she confide in now?
Janelle.
147
00:06:36,324 --> 00:06:38,459
Then I want you to talk
to janelle for me.
148
00:06:38,389 --> 00:06:41,558
You want me to ask janelle
to ask Nikki
149
00:06:41,438 --> 00:06:43,206
why she's mad at you?
150
00:06:43,154 --> 00:06:45,055
Yeah...
151
00:06:44,996 --> 00:06:48,099
Then, uh, meet me
back here at recess.
152
00:06:49,857 --> 00:06:51,390
James, James...
153
00:06:51,349 --> 00:06:53,984
Good news, buddy.
You are back on speech duty.
154
00:06:53,890 --> 00:06:55,625
I don't want to
pressure you,
155
00:06:55,575 --> 00:06:57,141
but write me
something amazing.
156
00:06:57,099 --> 00:06:58,366
You got it, Mike.
157
00:06:58,338 --> 00:07:00,206
No, no, James,
you don't understand.
158
00:07:00,149 --> 00:07:02,984
This has to be brilliant.
This has to be inspiring.
159
00:07:02,881 --> 00:07:04,515
I'll crank something out
by lunch.
160
00:07:04,469 --> 00:07:06,237
No...
161
00:07:06,184 --> 00:07:08,786
not with that
attitude you won't.
162
00:07:08,694 --> 00:07:10,695
Where are the nerves?
Where's the fear?
163
00:07:10,631 --> 00:07:13,432
Do you know what great athletes
do before the big game?
164
00:07:13,331 --> 00:07:15,966
Steroids?
165
00:07:15,872 --> 00:07:17,806
They throw up.
166
00:07:17,747 --> 00:07:19,681
Do you want me
to throw up, Mike?
167
00:07:19,620 --> 00:07:20,955
I want you to
care.
168
00:07:20,924 --> 00:07:23,425
Look at this.
Look at what Caitlin wrote.
169
00:07:26,000 --> 00:07:27,735
Huh.
170
00:07:27,684 --> 00:07:29,785
Oh, wow.
171
00:07:29,718 --> 00:07:33,687
[VOICE BREAKING]
Tell me she dances again.
172
00:07:33,530 --> 00:07:35,230
Hey, Paul.
173
00:07:35,181 --> 00:07:38,317
You seem chipper for a guy
who's about to lose his office.
174
00:07:38,199 --> 00:07:40,367
She won't want my office
after what I did.
175
00:07:40,296 --> 00:07:44,099
I trashed it.
I rock-star trashed it.
176
00:07:43,949 --> 00:07:46,484
You got to get up pretty early
in the morning
177
00:07:46,394 --> 00:07:48,595
to get the best
of Paul lassiter.
178
00:07:48,523 --> 00:07:51,058
Hey, Caitlin, listen.
Look at my office.
179
00:07:50,969 --> 00:07:53,137
If you like it,
you can have it.
180
00:07:53,065 --> 00:07:55,867
Paul, you are such
a gentleman.
181
00:07:55,766 --> 00:07:58,467
Well, it takes one
to know one.
182
00:07:58,371 --> 00:08:00,639
I got to warn you, though...
183
00:08:00,562 --> 00:08:02,596
I'm a bit of a pack r...
184
00:08:02,531 --> 00:08:03,999
[CLASSICAL MUSIC PLAYS]
185
00:08:03,931 --> 00:08:06,265
Stuart!
186
00:08:06,185 --> 00:08:07,485
I'll take it.
187
00:08:07,455 --> 00:08:09,690
Yes. And well you should.
188
00:08:09,616 --> 00:08:11,750
But I-I must warn you...
189
00:08:11,680 --> 00:08:12,981
it's haunted.
190
00:08:12,951 --> 00:08:14,418
Ohh! Ohh! Ohh!
191
00:08:14,381 --> 00:08:15,614
Aah! Aah! Aah!
192
00:08:15,587 --> 00:08:18,690
Aah! Aah! Aah! Aah!
[GLASS BREAKING]
193
00:08:18,574 --> 00:08:19,874
Mike...
194
00:08:19,844 --> 00:08:22,646
You know about the evil presence
in my office, right?
195
00:08:22,544 --> 00:08:24,479
Of course. She's standing
next to you.
196
00:08:25,562 --> 00:08:27,330
Boo-yah!
197
00:08:30,772 --> 00:08:33,006
Oh, janelle...
198
00:08:32,932 --> 00:08:37,702
Here. I snagged you
the last glazed.
199
00:08:37,507 --> 00:08:38,807
Let me guess...
200
00:08:38,777 --> 00:08:41,145
Mike asked you
to talk to me about Nikki.
201
00:08:41,064 --> 00:08:44,133
Yeah. They're both acting
like such children.
202
00:08:44,018 --> 00:08:47,621
Both?! She didn't have
a sleepover with a supermodel.
203
00:08:47,450 --> 00:08:48,750
Well, he
didn't freeze her out
204
00:08:48,720 --> 00:08:50,554
before giving her
a chance to explain.
205
00:08:50,499 --> 00:08:52,199
You mean a chance to ? lie.
206
00:08:52,150 --> 00:08:54,285
Are you calling my man
a liar?
207
00:08:55,263 --> 00:08:57,231
Maybe I ought to tell him
you said that.
208
00:08:57,169 --> 00:08:58,869
I'm surprised you kept
it in this long,
209
00:08:58,821 --> 00:09:01,657
you gossip!
210
00:09:01,553 --> 00:09:05,222
People in glass houses
shouldn't sleep with mayors.
211
00:09:07,240 --> 00:09:11,743
At least I've hada boyfriend this year.
212
00:09:11,559 --> 00:09:14,628
I don't think it's
gonna work out with us.
213
00:09:14,513 --> 00:09:17,282
Maybe you should take
your doughnut back.
214
00:09:18,007 --> 00:09:19,108
The press conference
215
00:09:19,088 --> 00:09:21,223
is supposed to start
any minute, Mike.
216
00:09:21,153 --> 00:09:23,621
Where's your boy?
217
00:09:23,535 --> 00:09:26,437
Well, first of all,
he's not a boy.
218
00:09:26,330 --> 00:09:30,801
It's just that...
He's a very old virgin.
219
00:09:30,619 --> 00:09:33,154
This may fly
in small-time, local politics...
220
00:09:33,064 --> 00:09:36,233
ha ha! New York City...
it's real small-time.
221
00:09:36,114 --> 00:09:39,317
[SOUTHERN ACCENT] The mayor
runs the filling station.
222
00:09:39,195 --> 00:09:41,630
Look, Mike, I'm sorry
if this offends you,
223
00:09:41,547 --> 00:09:44,916
but to do my job effectively,
I need complete control.
224
00:09:44,787 --> 00:09:48,190
Caitlin, that is an ugly,
small-minded attitude,
225
00:09:48,059 --> 00:09:50,127
and I've got dibs on it.
226
00:09:51,777 --> 00:09:52,810
Hot crowd! Hot crowd!
227
00:09:52,793 --> 00:09:54,227
These people are excited
228
00:09:54,190 --> 00:09:56,692
to hear my thoughts
on healthcare...
229
00:09:56,574 --> 00:09:59,041
As am I.
230
00:09:59,685 --> 00:10:01,019
There he is.
231
00:10:00,957 --> 00:10:02,390
There's my mvp.
232
00:10:02,354 --> 00:10:04,055
I know you wanted this
to be perfect,
233
00:10:04,007 --> 00:10:05,373
and now it
is perfect...
234
00:10:05,340 --> 00:10:07,407
That's what
we're looking for.
235
00:10:07,342 --> 00:10:09,443
...although there is
one point on page two
236
00:10:09,374 --> 00:10:10,741
that doesn't quite land.
237
00:10:10,708 --> 00:10:11,942
Almost perfect. Hey.
238
00:10:11,915 --> 00:10:13,683
Good enough.
239
00:10:13,631 --> 00:10:16,133
The sandcastle
metaphor... might be confusing.
240
00:10:16,045 --> 00:10:17,846
Hey, we're at the beach.
241
00:10:17,792 --> 00:10:19,060
I'm digging it.
242
00:10:19,031 --> 00:10:21,366
Let's have a press conference.
243
00:10:21,287 --> 00:10:25,157
Uh, no. It's bad. I'm
bad. Damn my badness!
244
00:10:26,655 --> 00:10:28,522
[SNIFFING]
245
00:10:28,466 --> 00:10:31,101
Did somebody throw up?
246
00:10:37,073 --> 00:10:39,640
JANELLE: He has no idea
he's about to get the ax.
247
00:10:39,551 --> 00:10:42,419
PAUL: Poor guy always
was out of the loop.
248
00:10:42,314 --> 00:10:44,548
Naive bastard.
249
00:10:42,500 --> 00:10:44,534
How could you guys know
already?
250
00:10:44,469 --> 00:10:46,336
Body language.
251
00:10:46,280 --> 00:10:47,680
Paul...
252
00:10:47,645 --> 00:10:50,113
Heating vent.
253
00:10:50,028 --> 00:10:52,930
So, why haven't you pulled
the trigger yet, big guy?
254
00:10:52,823 --> 00:10:54,691
Oh, come on, Stuart.
255
00:10:54,634 --> 00:10:56,535
Firing somebody is not easy.
256
00:10:56,476 --> 00:10:57,576
Huh.
257
00:10:57,557 --> 00:10:59,190
Just make a joke out of it.
258
00:10:59,145 --> 00:11:01,313
"Hey, James,
knock, knock."
259
00:11:01,241 --> 00:11:02,441
"Who's there?"
260
00:11:02,417 --> 00:11:03,850
"You're fired."
261
00:11:05,244 --> 00:11:07,712
"Why did the chicken
cross the road?
262
00:11:07,626 --> 00:11:10,262
To tell you
that you're fired."
263
00:11:10,168 --> 00:11:14,138
Or, "the pope, Jesus, and
a rabbi are in a rowboat.
264
00:11:13,979 --> 00:11:15,880
You're fired."
265
00:11:15,823 --> 00:11:18,057
You know what, Stuart?
266
00:11:17,982 --> 00:11:20,718
You are gonna be
the life...
267
00:11:20,619 --> 00:11:22,086
Of hell.
268
00:11:23,763 --> 00:11:26,765
Listen, James...
[CLEARS THROAT]
269
00:11:26,654 --> 00:11:29,089
Information travels
pretty fast around here,
270
00:11:29,004 --> 00:11:31,472
so I'm gonna assume
you've heard the rumors.
271
00:11:31,387 --> 00:11:32,821
Then it's true?
272
00:11:32,785 --> 00:11:34,786
Yeah, it is.
273
00:11:34,723 --> 00:11:36,890
I'm sorry, buddy.
274
00:11:36,819 --> 00:11:38,220
You gonna be okay?
275
00:11:38,186 --> 00:11:41,921
Me? Paul's the one
with the haunted office.
276
00:11:43,204 --> 00:11:46,606
All right, let's...
let's try this again.
277
00:11:49,843 --> 00:11:52,778
Knock, knock.
278
00:11:52,671 --> 00:11:54,605
Who's there?
279
00:11:54,545 --> 00:11:56,046
Nobody. Never mind.
280
00:11:56,007 --> 00:11:58,441
Man, this is so much harder
than I thought!
281
00:11:58,357 --> 00:11:59,757
"Nobody. Never mind.
282
00:11:59,723 --> 00:12:02,858
Man, this is so much harder
than I thought" who?
283
00:12:09,062 --> 00:12:10,262
Couldn't do it, could you?
284
00:12:10,237 --> 00:12:12,405
If I fired everyone
who couldn't do their jobs,
285
00:12:12,333 --> 00:12:14,101
there'd be no one left
but me.
286
00:12:14,049 --> 00:12:16,050
And you, because
you're within earshot.
287
00:12:15,986 --> 00:12:18,488
How are you gonna get this
past Caitlin?
288
00:12:18,401 --> 00:12:20,569
Well, I've got
some gossip for you.
289
00:12:20,498 --> 00:12:21,965
There's a little-known law
290
00:12:21,927 --> 00:12:24,262
that prohibits
private campaign workers
291
00:12:24,182 --> 00:12:26,951
from using public resources
like Paul's office.
292
00:12:26,851 --> 00:12:29,620
I slipped that information
to some reporters,
293
00:12:29,519 --> 00:12:31,988
and right now
they are peppering her
294
00:12:31,902 --> 00:12:34,337
with some
very difficult questions.
295
00:12:34,253 --> 00:12:36,020
Mike,
for future reference,
296
00:12:35,968 --> 00:12:38,703
gossip is supposed to be
interesting.
297
00:12:38,604 --> 00:12:40,271
Caitlin is goin'
down.
298
00:12:40,224 --> 00:12:43,126
Caitlin, you're goin'
straight to the top!
299
00:12:43,019 --> 00:12:44,687
I have never seen
a standing ovation
300
00:12:44,640 --> 00:12:47,275
at a press conference before.
301
00:12:47,181 --> 00:12:51,251
Obviously, some idiot leaked
incorrect information.
302
00:12:51,088 --> 00:12:52,588
MIKE: Hey!
303
00:12:52,550 --> 00:12:55,819
Don't call that person
an idiot.
304
00:12:55,694 --> 00:12:58,997
See? Now,
this is interesting.
305
00:12:58,871 --> 00:13:00,104
Hey, Betty!
306
00:13:00,077 --> 00:13:02,746
To be safe, I shouldn't
take Paul's office.
307
00:13:02,651 --> 00:13:05,186
I'll just have a phone
put in somewhere.
308
00:13:05,097 --> 00:13:08,466
I got a lot of work done
this morning at Mike's desk.
309
00:13:08,337 --> 00:13:10,404
You want to put a phone
in my office?
310
00:13:10,338 --> 00:13:13,507
Why, thank you, Mike!
I'll take you up on that.
311
00:13:13,388 --> 00:13:17,992
You can have your number-one and
number-two people in the same place.
312
00:13:17,803 --> 00:13:19,704
No, no. Your number one...
your number on e
313
00:13:19,646 --> 00:13:23,415
and your number-two people
need their own private domains.
314
00:13:23,268 --> 00:13:24,868
Mike, some advice...
315
00:13:24,824 --> 00:13:26,858
keep your friends close...
316
00:13:26,793 --> 00:13:28,727
And your enemies closer.
317
00:13:28,667 --> 00:13:31,302
No, that makes my advice
so sinister.
318
00:13:33,432 --> 00:13:36,268
Caitlin...
319
00:13:36,164 --> 00:13:39,800
Listen, I know you think youhave all the answers,
320
00:13:39,659 --> 00:13:43,094
but believe me,
you need what I have up here.
321
00:13:42,962 --> 00:13:46,465
What?
Half a bottle of mousse?
322
00:13:46,330 --> 00:13:47,596
Fine, fine.
323
00:13:47,568 --> 00:13:49,603
But you're gonna learn
this sooner or later...
324
00:13:49,537 --> 00:13:51,739
nothing happens around here
without me.
325
00:13:51,666 --> 00:13:53,968
I fired James.
326
00:13:56,019 --> 00:13:58,653
Touche.
327
00:14:00,535 --> 00:14:02,135
Poor James.
328
00:14:02,091 --> 00:14:05,126
Look at his little desk.
329
00:14:05,013 --> 00:14:07,315
I still expect him
to be there.
330
00:14:07,238 --> 00:14:08,738
He is still there.
331
00:14:08,698 --> 00:14:10,032
James?
332
00:14:10,001 --> 00:14:11,768
JAMES: Yeah, Mike?
333
00:14:14,035 --> 00:14:15,869
Come on out.
334
00:14:15,814 --> 00:14:18,282
I, uh, found a quarter.
335
00:14:18,196 --> 00:14:21,666
Guess I'm gonna need it,
huh?
336
00:14:23,438 --> 00:14:25,839
[VOICE BREAKING]
What am I gonna do, Mike?
337
00:14:25,757 --> 00:14:27,891
Can't go back to the farm.
338
00:14:27,821 --> 00:14:30,456
They'll make me
a scarecrow again.
339
00:14:31,952 --> 00:14:35,154
Crows aren't scared
of me, Mike.
340
00:14:35,032 --> 00:14:38,334
In fact,
they find me delicious.
341
00:14:38,208 --> 00:14:41,077
Look, y-you're not fired.
342
00:14:40,973 --> 00:14:43,874
In fact,
y-you're promoted...
343
00:14:43,767 --> 00:14:48,171
To, uh, to deputy...
344
00:14:47,993 --> 00:14:51,395
Deputy mayor.
345
00:14:51,265 --> 00:14:53,298
Deputy deputy mayor!
346
00:14:54,537 --> 00:14:56,872
Mike, w-what is that
exactly?
347
00:14:56,793 --> 00:14:58,760
Well...
348
00:15:00,986 --> 00:15:02,285
Uh...
349
00:15:02,256 --> 00:15:05,392
Deputy deputy mayor,
uh, uh, uh,
350
00:15:05,274 --> 00:15:07,442
answers my phones, and...
351
00:15:07,371 --> 00:15:08,738
and sets my schedule,
352
00:15:08,705 --> 00:15:10,973
and runs
personal errands for me.
353
00:15:10,896 --> 00:15:12,997
How is that different
from an assistant?
354
00:15:12,930 --> 00:15:14,396
Well, if you have to ask,
355
00:15:14,359 --> 00:15:15,793
maybe you're not ready.
356
00:15:15,756 --> 00:15:16,990
N-no, I-I am!
357
00:15:16,964 --> 00:15:19,666
Deputy deputy mayor James hobert
at your service!
358
00:15:19,568 --> 00:15:20,969
All right. Hey!
359
00:15:20,934 --> 00:15:23,636
The city is depending
on you.
360
00:15:23,539 --> 00:15:26,775
Get me a cup of coffee?
361
00:15:26,652 --> 00:15:29,821
Yeah, I'd like
the biggest bouquet you have
362
00:15:29,702 --> 00:15:32,304
sent to Caitlin Moore
at city hall.
363
00:15:32,211 --> 00:15:33,778
Ooh!
364
00:15:33,736 --> 00:15:37,204
And money
is a gigantic o bject.
365
00:15:37,071 --> 00:15:39,572
Paul, the only way you're gonna
get to keep your office
366
00:15:41,169 --> 00:15:43,671
is if you put Caitlin
in her place.
367
00:15:43,583 --> 00:15:45,017
Gladly...
368
00:15:44,981 --> 00:15:48,016
That backstabbing,
opportunistic hussy!
369
00:15:47,904 --> 00:15:49,337
I mean to her face.
370
00:15:49,301 --> 00:15:51,736
What are you, crazy?
371
00:15:51,652 --> 00:15:53,787
[SINGSONG VOICE]
Good afternoon!
372
00:15:53,717 --> 00:15:55,718
Well, now that
you're here it is.
373
00:15:57,307 --> 00:16:00,442
But you know what would
make it even better?
374
00:16:00,324 --> 00:16:01,625
If you were dead.
375
00:16:04,517 --> 00:16:08,821
I suck up to you
until I'm out of suck...
376
00:16:08,647 --> 00:16:10,114
And I'm out of
up,
377
00:16:10,076 --> 00:16:11,343
and what do you do?
378
00:16:11,316 --> 00:16:13,584
You come in,
you take my office!
379
00:16:13,507 --> 00:16:16,008
Well, what do you say
we switch roles
380
00:16:15,921 --> 00:16:17,288
for a minute, okay?
381
00:16:17,256 --> 00:16:19,890
How about you kiss
my ass for a while?
382
00:16:23,735 --> 00:16:26,737
Paul, I'm not taking
your office.
383
00:16:26,626 --> 00:16:28,694
I'm gonna share Mike's.
384
00:16:33,297 --> 00:16:35,932
Did I forget
to mention that?
385
00:16:38,983 --> 00:16:40,451
What are you doing?
386
00:16:40,413 --> 00:16:41,814
Rummaging around my office.
387
00:16:41,779 --> 00:16:43,980
You're rummaging
around Caitlin's desk.
388
00:16:43,907 --> 00:16:45,441
Which is in my office.
389
00:16:45,400 --> 00:16:48,569
She's made such a mess,
I can't find my sunglasses.
390
00:16:48,450 --> 00:16:52,553
Maybe they're on her hard drive.
391
00:16:52,389 --> 00:16:55,024
Mike, I don't care what
that woman has done to you.
392
00:16:54,930 --> 00:16:57,998
There is no justifying
this invasion of her privacy.
393
00:16:57,883 --> 00:17:00,652
Come on. She fired James.
You could be next.
394
00:17:00,553 --> 00:17:02,086
Let's fire that baby up.
395
00:17:02,045 --> 00:17:03,513
Oh, no. Look at this...
396
00:17:03,475 --> 00:17:06,177
she entered the mayor in
a celebrity golf tournament.
397
00:17:06,080 --> 00:17:08,514
He "cheats" off in an hour.
398
00:17:10,209 --> 00:17:12,610
You don't think he'd know
better in a tournament?
399
00:17:12,528 --> 00:17:14,496
You haven't played
with the man!
400
00:17:14,433 --> 00:17:16,735
He has lost all concept
of right and wrong.
401
00:17:16,658 --> 00:17:18,058
Oh, look, her journal.
402
00:17:18,024 --> 00:17:20,359
Ooh.
403
00:17:24,504 --> 00:17:26,973
[SCATTERED APPLAUSE]
404
00:17:27,798 --> 00:17:29,799
Excuse me.
Thank God I'm not too late.
405
00:17:29,735 --> 00:17:31,135
We've got a caddy, Mike.
406
00:17:32,086 --> 00:17:34,454
I have a feeling I'm gonna win.
407
00:17:34,373 --> 00:17:37,409
There's a very good reason
you should not play.
408
00:17:37,296 --> 00:17:40,264
I think I can hold my own
against nipsey Russell.
409
00:17:40,155 --> 00:17:42,189
I'm not gonna try to be
delicate about this.
410
00:17:42,124 --> 00:17:43,557
You cheat.
411
00:17:43,522 --> 00:17:45,356
That's absurd!
412
00:17:45,300 --> 00:17:47,435
Sir...
413
00:17:50,193 --> 00:17:53,128
Maybe I should go make
an excuse to the organizers.
414
00:17:53,020 --> 00:17:56,189
No, no, no,
I'd still like to play.
415
00:17:56,069 --> 00:17:57,135
Who knows?
416
00:17:57,118 --> 00:17:58,652
Maybe I'm good.
417
00:17:58,610 --> 00:18:01,913
I want to see your score card
before you sign it, sir,
418
00:18:01,787 --> 00:18:03,855
and no running
with the ball.
419
00:18:03,788 --> 00:18:06,389
That could have been
really bad.
420
00:18:06,297 --> 00:18:08,966
Caitlin, I know the mayor
better than anyone else.
421
00:18:08,870 --> 00:18:11,139
He gets testy
in the afternoon,
422
00:18:11,063 --> 00:18:13,731
he has never seen
the second act of a play...
423
00:18:13,636 --> 00:18:16,238
Son of a...
424
00:18:18,051 --> 00:18:20,353
...and he's
an extremely sore loser.
425
00:18:20,275 --> 00:18:22,677
Andthen he cheats.
426
00:18:22,594 --> 00:18:24,027
Even nipsey knows.
427
00:18:25,517 --> 00:18:28,252
Mike...
Nikki.
428
00:18:28,153 --> 00:18:31,989
Apparently, you told Carter
to tell James to tell Paul
429
00:18:31,838 --> 00:18:34,739
to tell janelle
to tell me something?
430
00:18:36,095 --> 00:18:38,296
By the time your message
got back around to me,
431
00:18:38,222 --> 00:18:40,090
here's what
it had been twisted into...
432
00:18:40,034 --> 00:18:41,400
you don't think we broke up.
433
00:18:41,368 --> 00:18:42,902
Wow.
434
00:18:42,861 --> 00:18:46,631
Can you tell janelle
to tell Paul to tell Carter
435
00:18:46,482 --> 00:18:49,217
to tell James, "good job"?
436
00:18:51,057 --> 00:18:53,725
How can you think
that we're not broken up?
437
00:18:53,629 --> 00:18:56,031
Look, about Heidi,
like I said,
438
00:18:55,948 --> 00:18:57,282
I-I can explain.
439
00:18:57,251 --> 00:18:59,920
I-I don't want
to hear it, Mike!
440
00:18:59,824 --> 00:19:03,760
You know, you're so adept
at spinning scenarios
441
00:19:03,604 --> 00:19:05,438
and sounding sincere,
442
00:19:05,383 --> 00:19:06,850
you just naturally go there.
443
00:19:06,812 --> 00:19:09,348
It's gotten to the point
where I never even know
444
00:19:09,259 --> 00:19:10,859
what to believe from you.
445
00:19:10,815 --> 00:19:14,017
I know it seems
like I do that a lot.
446
00:19:15,866 --> 00:19:19,602
But I can explain.
447
00:19:19,455 --> 00:19:22,791
You are impossible.
448
00:19:24,696 --> 00:19:27,231
Mike, uh,
Nikki wants me to tell you
449
00:19:27,142 --> 00:19:28,509
she broke your cup.
450
00:19:30,795 --> 00:19:39,937
Knock, knock.
451
00:19:39,531 --> 00:19:41,332
Caitlin, I just wanted
to apologize.
452
00:19:41,279 --> 00:19:43,446
Oh, no need
to apologize, Paul.
453
00:19:43,375 --> 00:19:45,842
In fact, I much prefer
someone who will tell me
454
00:19:45,757 --> 00:19:47,325
what's on his mind
to a suck-up.
455
00:19:47,283 --> 00:19:50,218
Just when I thought
there was nothing more
456
00:19:50,237 --> 00:19:51,537
to admire about you.
457
00:19:51,508 --> 00:19:57,112
My point, Paul, is...
You don't need to suck up.
458
00:19:56,876 --> 00:20:00,111
That is great advice.
459
00:19:59,989 --> 00:20:03,324
Paul, really, stop.
460
00:20:03,197 --> 00:20:06,032
[LAUGHING]
I don't think I can.
461
00:20:05,928 --> 00:20:09,398
You'll just end up
alienating me.
462
00:20:09,265 --> 00:20:12,666
I'm aware of the irony.
463
00:20:12,536 --> 00:20:16,339
Love your hair color!
464
00:20:16,189 --> 00:20:18,825
MAN: Sit, ubu, sit.
Good dog.
465
00:20:18,731 --> 00:20:19,964
(BARKING)
466
00:20:20,014 --> 00:20:24,564
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