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1
00:00:02,033 --> 00:00:04,801
Just the man I want.
You went to catholic school.
2
00:00:04,868 --> 00:00:06,234
St. Mary's.
12 horrible years.
3
00:00:06,300 --> 00:00:08,234
I still have limited use
of my knuckles.
4
00:00:08,300 --> 00:00:10,067
Remember a sister Margaret?
5
00:00:10,133 --> 00:00:13,234
She was the ringleader.
Scary, awful, monster of a woman.
6
00:00:13,300 --> 00:00:15,801
Well, she speaks
highly of you, too, Paul.
7
00:00:15,868 --> 00:00:19,601
She's coming by here later.
She's having problems with her neighborhood.
8
00:00:19,667 --> 00:00:22,167
I said you would talk
to her about them.
9
00:00:22,234 --> 00:00:24,067
Never.
Not in a million years.
10
00:00:24,133 --> 00:00:26,133
Correct answer was
"yes, I'd love to,"
11
00:00:26,200 --> 00:00:28,334
and good morning, sister.
12
00:00:28,400 --> 00:00:29,868
Good morning, sister?
13
00:00:29,934 --> 00:00:31,167
Hello, Paul.
14
00:00:34,200 --> 00:00:37,400
morning. What could I do
for you, sister Margaret?
15
00:00:37,467 --> 00:00:40,167
Start by telling me why I never
see you at church anymore.
16
00:00:40,234 --> 00:00:43,434
I- I joined
a different parish.
17
00:00:43,501 --> 00:00:45,000
And who's your priest?
18
00:00:45,067 --> 00:00:46,901
Father
o'... Connor?
19
00:00:48,100 --> 00:00:49,801
O'leary?
20
00:00:49,868 --> 00:00:52,300
O'Cohen?
21
00:00:52,367 --> 00:00:53,534
Oh, my.
22
00:00:54,868 --> 00:00:55,834
You're lyin'.
23
00:00:55,901 --> 00:00:57,434
Oh, God.
24
00:00:57,501 --> 00:00:59,601
Now you've taken
the lord's name in vain.
25
00:00:59,667 --> 00:01:02,400
Oh, God, I'm sorry.
Oh, God! I did it again.
26
00:01:02,467 --> 00:01:03,534
Oh, God-
oh! I can't stop.
27
00:01:03,601 --> 00:01:07,334
Oh, God. I can't stop!
Oh, ga-ga-ga-God...
28
00:01:07,400 --> 00:01:09,834
Sister, I'll take
care of this for you.
29
00:01:26,834 --> 00:01:29,601
Hopefully, it's not too transparent
an attempt to attract voters.
30
00:01:29,667 --> 00:01:32,167
We got the go-ahead on that free
concert, Madison square garden.
31
00:01:32,234 --> 00:01:33,767
Maxwell, Travis and Johns
32
00:01:33,834 --> 00:01:36,067
are going to reunite
for one night only.
33
00:01:36,133 --> 00:01:37,567
Didn't they play at Woodstock?
34
00:01:37,634 --> 00:01:40,400
So what? They've gotta
be, like, 90 years old.
35
00:01:40,467 --> 00:01:43,601
Why don't we just reunite
the Andrew sisters?
36
00:01:43,667 --> 00:01:45,667
Hey, back off, man!
M.t. j. Rocks.
37
00:01:48,334 --> 00:01:50,334
When I was 15, my mom drove me
38
00:01:50,400 --> 00:01:52,234
to the concert in Madison.
Let me guess.
39
00:01:52,300 --> 00:01:55,267
You went to the concert,
the band "rocked,"
40
00:01:55,334 --> 00:01:59,267
you bought a $65 t-shirt,
and screamed like an idiot
41
00:01:59,334 --> 00:02:02,100
when the band said,
"hello, Wisconsin!"
42
00:02:02,167 --> 00:02:03,701
Were you there?
43
00:02:05,901 --> 00:02:07,534
Ok, then.
Meeting is adjourned.
44
00:02:09,000 --> 00:02:12,000
I say, meeting is adjourned.
45
00:02:12,067 --> 00:02:13,567
What?
46
00:02:13,634 --> 00:02:15,501
Are you going to
break up with Carrie?
47
00:02:15,567 --> 00:02:17,367
When did it become
office policy
48
00:02:17,434 --> 00:02:19,033
to review my personal life?
49
00:02:19,100 --> 00:02:21,167
You started it, Mike.
When you became single,
50
00:02:21,234 --> 00:02:25,300
all you wanted to do
was talk and talk and talk.
51
00:02:25,367 --> 00:02:27,367
It was kind of like
a soap opera.
52
00:02:27,434 --> 00:02:30,667
First it was really,
really irritating.
53
00:02:32,634 --> 00:02:34,567
But you listen to enough of it,
54
00:02:34,634 --> 00:02:37,267
and all of a sudden,
boom! You're hooked.
55
00:02:38,934 --> 00:02:39,934
So, today on
56
00:02:40,000 --> 00:02:42,767
"deputy mayor
in heat... "
57
00:02:45,234 --> 00:02:46,367
All right.
58
00:02:46,434 --> 00:02:48,567
I like Carrie a lot,
59
00:02:48,634 --> 00:02:50,834
but she walks that fine line
60
00:02:50,901 --> 00:02:53,234
between incredibly intense
61
00:02:53,300 --> 00:02:54,834
and borderline loopy.
62
00:02:56,300 --> 00:02:58,501
So I'm afraid tonight I'll
have to break up with her.
63
00:02:58,567 --> 00:03:01,300
Hold on a second.
Paul couldn't be here.
64
00:03:01,367 --> 00:03:02,934
He asked me to tape it.
65
00:03:06,467 --> 00:03:08,467
Ok. One last item:
66
00:03:08,534 --> 00:03:10,067
I'm having a secret meeting
67
00:03:10,133 --> 00:03:11,601
tomorrow morning
68
00:03:11,667 --> 00:03:13,367
without Paul.
69
00:03:13,434 --> 00:03:15,100
I'd like you all to show up
70
00:03:15,167 --> 00:03:16,601
around 5 a. m.
71
00:03:24,300 --> 00:03:26,467
4:30 is better
for me, Mike.
72
00:03:32,434 --> 00:03:35,234
That's you and me
at the duck pond.
73
00:03:35,300 --> 00:03:37,434
Don't we look happy?
74
00:03:37,501 --> 00:03:38,868
Oh, yeah. Very.
75
00:03:38,934 --> 00:03:40,801
Very happy. Happy.
76
00:03:40,868 --> 00:03:43,000
Happy us.
77
00:03:43,067 --> 00:03:44,567
What's going on with you, Mike?
78
00:03:44,634 --> 00:03:46,267
You're all nervous.
79
00:03:46,334 --> 00:03:47,267
No, no.
80
00:03:47,334 --> 00:03:48,901
Oh! Gosh.
Boo!
81
00:03:48,968 --> 00:03:51,367
See? Come on,
lighten up.
82
00:03:51,434 --> 00:03:52,701
I can hear your heart beating.
83
00:03:52,767 --> 00:03:54,934
I think my heart has stopped.
84
00:03:56,868 --> 00:03:59,601
ok. What did you
want to say?
85
00:03:59,667 --> 00:04:02,601
Ok. All right.
Here it goes.
86
00:04:02,667 --> 00:04:06,000
Carrie, I just,
I feel very strong-
87
00:04:06,067 --> 00:04:07,467
can we move that?
88
00:04:07,534 --> 00:04:09,501
The glare is really killing me.
89
00:04:11,601 --> 00:04:14,534
There, there.
All better.
90
00:04:14,601 --> 00:04:16,400
Ok. You were saying?
91
00:04:16,467 --> 00:04:18,501
Here it goes.
I think that...
92
00:04:18,567 --> 00:04:20,033
Ok, now it's just
staring at me.
93
00:04:21,634 --> 00:04:24,934
Ok. You're having trouble
with conversation starters.
94
00:04:25,000 --> 00:04:26,033
I've got one!
95
00:04:26,100 --> 00:04:27,801
I'm ready to have children,
96
00:04:27,868 --> 00:04:29,834
and I think you'd make
a great father.
97
00:04:33,000 --> 00:04:35,701
Questions? Comments?
98
00:04:35,767 --> 00:04:38,067
I've only known you
for 3 weeks.
99
00:04:38,133 --> 00:04:39,667
I mean, I...
100
00:04:39,734 --> 00:04:41,968
Normally I don't
discuss fatherhood
101
00:04:42,033 --> 00:04:45,000
or kids until...
102
00:04:45,067 --> 00:04:46,000
Never.
103
00:04:47,667 --> 00:04:50,701
I am too old to go down
a very long road with someone
104
00:04:50,767 --> 00:04:53,501
unless I am sure they're
going to the same place.
105
00:04:53,567 --> 00:04:55,234
W- w-what
if we're not?
106
00:04:57,667 --> 00:04:59,434
Well, then I guess
107
00:04:59,501 --> 00:05:01,701
I'd have to break up with you.
108
00:05:07,567 --> 00:05:10,467
Get outta town.
109
00:05:10,534 --> 00:05:11,868
Are you...
Are you serious?
110
00:05:11,934 --> 00:05:13,501
I am totally serious.
111
00:05:16,000 --> 00:05:18,167
Wow. Wow.
112
00:05:18,234 --> 00:05:20,067
Well, then I...
113
00:05:20,133 --> 00:05:22,167
I guess...
114
00:05:22,234 --> 00:05:23,334
I guess it's over.
115
00:05:24,767 --> 00:05:27,067
I can't believe
you did this to me.
116
00:05:28,767 --> 00:05:30,467
Oh, Mike, maybe we
should think about it.
117
00:05:30,534 --> 00:05:31,467
No, no, no, no...
No, no.
118
00:05:33,000 --> 00:05:35,634
No, no, no.
That wouldn't be fair to you,
119
00:05:35,701 --> 00:05:37,701
dragging it out like that.
120
00:05:37,767 --> 00:05:40,033
No, no, no.
No, you've got a schedule.
121
00:05:41,667 --> 00:05:43,267
This just happened so fast.
122
00:05:43,334 --> 00:05:45,834
I know. I just never
saw it comin'.
123
00:05:48,834 --> 00:05:49,767
Well, I gotta go.
124
00:05:51,033 --> 00:05:53,400
Wait! Mike...
125
00:05:54,834 --> 00:05:55,901
Just because
we're not gonna spend
126
00:05:55,968 --> 00:05:57,534
the rest of our lives together
127
00:05:57,601 --> 00:05:58,634
doesn't mean we can't have
128
00:05:58,701 --> 00:06:01,567
one more night together.
129
00:06:02,934 --> 00:06:04,300
Wait. Wait.
130
00:06:04,367 --> 00:06:05,567
You just broke up with me,
131
00:06:05,634 --> 00:06:08,300
and now you want to...
132
00:06:08,367 --> 00:06:09,334
What are you, a guy?
133
00:06:14,868 --> 00:06:16,300
Wait a minute.
134
00:06:16,367 --> 00:06:18,634
You dumped her and slept
with her on the same night?
135
00:06:20,100 --> 00:06:21,634
I mean, you're like James Bond.
136
00:06:23,334 --> 00:06:25,334
Congratulations, Mike.
137
00:06:25,400 --> 00:06:28,100
Yeah, we're so proud of you.
138
00:06:28,167 --> 00:06:32,801
I was in a very vulnerable
place last night, ok?
139
00:06:32,868 --> 00:06:34,801
I'm ashamed of myself.
140
00:06:39,300 --> 00:06:41,968
You just pulled down
your own rebound, Mike.
141
00:06:42,033 --> 00:06:43,434
Very few guys in our league
142
00:06:43,501 --> 00:06:44,868
can score on a play like that.
143
00:06:44,934 --> 00:06:46,200
I got a question.
144
00:06:46,267 --> 00:06:49,467
Did you have sex before
or after you broke up?
145
00:06:49,534 --> 00:06:50,467
After.
146
00:06:50,534 --> 00:06:51,834
I've got news for you, honey.
147
00:06:51,901 --> 00:06:53,534
You didn't break up.
148
00:06:54,734 --> 00:06:55,834
What's she talking about?
149
00:06:55,901 --> 00:06:58,634
Any sex within 24 hours
after the break-up
150
00:06:58,701 --> 00:06:59,934
is technically
make-up sex.
151
00:07:00,000 --> 00:07:01,601
Technically, you made up.
152
00:07:05,234 --> 00:07:06,501
No.
153
00:07:07,934 --> 00:07:10,601
aw, I'm so glad
that I was informed.
154
00:07:10,667 --> 00:07:12,667
I wish somebody
would just write down
155
00:07:12,734 --> 00:07:14,100
all these rules for me.
156
00:07:14,167 --> 00:07:15,234
I'll give you one.
157
00:07:15,300 --> 00:07:17,267
Next time you want
to end a relationship,
158
00:07:17,334 --> 00:07:19,300
try letting the woman
shake your hand.
159
00:07:23,400 --> 00:07:27,033
Hey, Paulie. What's up?
You look like hell.
160
00:07:27,100 --> 00:07:30,601
There was no secret
meeting, was there, Mike?
161
00:07:36,300 --> 00:07:37,701
'Fraid not, Paulie.
162
00:07:37,767 --> 00:07:39,033
Sorry about that.
163
00:07:40,667 --> 00:07:42,100
it's tomorrow.
164
00:07:48,167 --> 00:07:51,033
Sorry to keep
you dudes waiting.
165
00:07:51,100 --> 00:07:52,701
No problem,
mr. Mayor.
166
00:07:52,767 --> 00:07:55,100
This is wonderful tea.
167
00:07:55,167 --> 00:07:56,601
Well, thank you.
Thank you.
168
00:07:56,667 --> 00:07:59,167
That's a rock 'n roll thing?
That's good for the voice?
169
00:07:59,234 --> 00:08:01,934
It keeps me regular.
170
00:08:03,000 --> 00:08:04,501
Ok. Rock on.
171
00:08:05,801 --> 00:08:07,400
I hope you
don't mind me asking,
172
00:08:07,467 --> 00:08:10,133
but why did you fellas break
up in the first place?
173
00:08:10,200 --> 00:08:12,667
That may be thin ice, sir.
What?
174
00:08:12,734 --> 00:08:14,200
That's all right.
Uh...
175
00:08:14,267 --> 00:08:16,868
We just lost sight
of why we played music.
176
00:08:16,934 --> 00:08:18,501
It became all about money.
177
00:08:19,968 --> 00:08:21,234
So, you boys got
those contracts?
178
00:08:21,300 --> 00:08:22,267
Yeah.
179
00:08:25,534 --> 00:08:28,701
Put your herbie
hancocks right there.
180
00:08:28,767 --> 00:08:32,100
Herbie hancocks.
That's a little rock 'n roll humor.
181
00:08:32,167 --> 00:08:33,767
yeah.
It's a good one.
182
00:08:35,334 --> 00:08:36,968
You see, I thought you broke up
183
00:08:37,033 --> 00:08:39,200
because you, Kevin,
write all the music
184
00:08:39,267 --> 00:08:43,501
and the lyrics, but Johnny seems
to get all the attention.
185
00:08:43,567 --> 00:08:46,634
Yeah, always did have a knack for
sticking' his face out front.
186
00:08:46,701 --> 00:08:48,801
I don't deserve
a little recognition?
187
00:08:48,868 --> 00:08:49,934
Tell you what-
188
00:08:50,000 --> 00:08:51,968
let's play "first one
to sign the contract
189
00:08:52,033 --> 00:08:56,300
gets a free picture of the
mayor on his vacation. "
190
00:08:56,367 --> 00:08:57,400
Oh, look, Johnny.
191
00:08:57,467 --> 00:08:58,634
It's the same Island
192
00:08:58,701 --> 00:09:00,467
you and your bimbo
girlfriend stayed on
193
00:09:00,534 --> 00:09:03,133
while I was holed up in the
studio writing our last album.
194
00:09:03,200 --> 00:09:04,701
I should have renamed that one
195
00:09:04,767 --> 00:09:07,300
bite me, you ungrateful,
self-centered jerk.
196
00:09:08,767 --> 00:09:09,801
Well, hey, now,
197
00:09:09,868 --> 00:09:10,801
we both know that wouldn't sell
198
00:09:10,868 --> 00:09:12,501
a million copies.
199
00:09:12,567 --> 00:09:13,968
I'm outta here.
200
00:09:18,667 --> 00:09:20,801
Way to go with
the picture, Mike.
201
00:09:25,868 --> 00:09:27,601
Care for a cup of coffee, sister?
202
00:09:27,667 --> 00:09:30,234
I take my strength
from the lord, Paul,
203
00:09:30,300 --> 00:09:33,100
not from some popular narcotic.
204
00:09:36,501 --> 00:09:39,667
Now, tomorrow I'm coming
with the entire parish
205
00:09:39,734 --> 00:09:41,801
to talk about
our security issues.
206
00:09:41,868 --> 00:09:43,834
I want a plan for
keeping those hooligans
207
00:09:43,901 --> 00:09:44,934
off the property.
208
00:09:45,000 --> 00:09:46,834
You could put a big picture
209
00:09:46,901 --> 00:09:48,834
of yourself out front.
210
00:09:48,901 --> 00:09:51,434
That might do the trick.
211
00:09:58,000 --> 00:09:58,934
Carrie's here.
212
00:09:59,000 --> 00:10:00,901
Oh! Just a minute,
janelle.
213
00:10:04,868 --> 00:10:06,000
Mike?
214
00:10:08,634 --> 00:10:10,133
You look terrible.
215
00:10:10,200 --> 00:10:12,033
There are going
to be good days,
216
00:10:12,100 --> 00:10:14,634
and there are going to be bad.
217
00:10:14,701 --> 00:10:16,400
Why did you want to see me?
218
00:10:16,467 --> 00:10:19,000
I guess I just...
I had to know for sure
219
00:10:19,067 --> 00:10:21,801
that it...
It was really over.
220
00:10:23,667 --> 00:10:25,067
I'm sorry, Mike.
It is.
221
00:10:28,501 --> 00:10:31,534
Well, that's ok.
I just had to know...
222
00:10:31,601 --> 00:10:32,534
For sure.
223
00:10:34,467 --> 00:10:35,434
Shake?
224
00:10:40,801 --> 00:10:43,434
You know, it's been
tough on me, too.
225
00:10:43,501 --> 00:10:45,334
I mean, I sat there last night.
226
00:10:45,400 --> 00:10:47,133
I laid in bed all night
227
00:10:47,200 --> 00:10:49,467
hearing nothing
but the sound of that clock
228
00:10:49,534 --> 00:10:52,868
next to my bed,
counting away my life.
229
00:10:52,934 --> 00:10:56,234
Tick, tick, tick.
230
00:10:56,300 --> 00:10:59,400
And then I realized
what I need to do.
231
00:10:59,467 --> 00:11:01,767
Get a digital clock?
232
00:11:03,133 --> 00:11:05,534
I can't wait any longer,
233
00:11:05,601 --> 00:11:08,534
so I'm just gonna go ahead
and have a baby on my own.
234
00:11:08,601 --> 00:11:09,767
That's great.
235
00:11:09,834 --> 00:11:11,634
Me? I'm gonna
go out and have
236
00:11:11,701 --> 00:11:14,400
a couple of beers
with the guys, but...
237
00:11:14,467 --> 00:11:17,133
We all handle grief
in our own ways.
238
00:11:17,200 --> 00:11:22,267
See? Your sense of humor.
That's such a wonderful trait.
239
00:11:22,334 --> 00:11:25,701
Ahh, that's why I'm so happy
I'm having your baby.
240
00:11:34,501 --> 00:11:36,601
Are you telling me
that you're pregnant?
241
00:11:36,667 --> 00:11:40,400
Nope. But I will be,
thanks to you.
242
00:11:40,467 --> 00:11:42,400
Wait, am I missing a step here,
243
00:11:42,467 --> 00:11:46,934
because if you're talking
about last night,
244
00:11:47,000 --> 00:11:48,634
I took precautions-
245
00:11:48,701 --> 00:11:50,234
we took precautions.
246
00:11:50,300 --> 00:11:52,367
Let's just say
I'm the kind of girl
247
00:11:52,434 --> 00:11:55,167
that never throws
anything away.
248
00:12:01,234 --> 00:12:03,400
I put it in the freezer.
249
00:12:03,467 --> 00:12:05,968
You froze my guys?!
250
00:12:08,100 --> 00:12:09,767
I'm just here
to get your blessing.
251
00:12:09,834 --> 00:12:12,567
What am I, the pope?!
252
00:12:12,634 --> 00:12:16,334
Don't yell at me. Those are my guys!
I want them back!
253
00:12:16,400 --> 00:12:18,567
All right, look, if you're
gonna be all weird about this,
254
00:12:18,634 --> 00:12:20,801
I'm just gonna leave.
You can't do this!
255
00:12:23,534 --> 00:12:25,801
Give me back my sperm!
256
00:12:30,934 --> 00:12:32,667
How you guys doin'?
257
00:12:39,567 --> 00:12:41,067
Crucified in the press.
258
00:12:41,133 --> 00:12:44,567
My approval ratings
have dropped overnight.
259
00:12:44,634 --> 00:12:46,701
Get that band back
together again.
260
00:12:46,767 --> 00:12:48,767
My first priority, sir.
261
00:12:48,834 --> 00:12:52,133
Ok. Mike's fertility
clinic open for business.
262
00:12:53,801 --> 00:12:55,734
Nikki. Medical. Go.
263
00:12:55,801 --> 00:12:58,734
This particular insemination
method can work,
264
00:12:58,801 --> 00:13:02,033
although obviously it isn't
popular amongst most women.
265
00:13:03,601 --> 00:13:06,133
For one, they don't get
dinner and cab fare home.
266
00:13:07,467 --> 00:13:08,634
All right. Legal.
267
00:13:08,701 --> 00:13:11,267
Basically, the rulings
are confusing
268
00:13:11,334 --> 00:13:13,067
and arbitrary,
269
00:13:13,133 --> 00:13:17,601
referring to...
lots of cases in books I couldn't find.
270
00:13:22,167 --> 00:13:24,300
Keep in mind I'm not a lawyer.
271
00:13:24,367 --> 00:13:26,067
Mike, that's Carrie on line 2.
272
00:13:27,434 --> 00:13:28,501
Uh, Carrie. Hi.
273
00:13:28,567 --> 00:13:31,033
Uh, yeah.
Listen, uh... uh...
274
00:13:31,100 --> 00:13:33,067
Put her on-put her-
what? What?
275
00:13:33,133 --> 00:13:34,567
Put her on hold!
Trust me.
276
00:13:34,634 --> 00:13:36,968
Put her on.
Put her on hold.
277
00:13:37,033 --> 00:13:39,667
Carrie, I'm just
gonna put you on hold.
278
00:13:39,734 --> 00:13:43,300
Mike, I was this close
from getting into the CIA.
279
00:13:43,367 --> 00:13:45,267
Trust me, we gotta treat this
280
00:13:45,334 --> 00:13:47,701
like a hostage situation.
281
00:13:49,834 --> 00:13:50,767
Lassiter here.
282
00:13:52,200 --> 00:13:55,100
Yes, I am fully apprised
of the situation.
283
00:13:55,167 --> 00:13:57,267
Now, before we can even
begin to talk,
284
00:13:57,334 --> 00:13:59,100
as a show of good faith,
285
00:13:59,167 --> 00:14:00,567
you have to release 1,
286
00:14:00,634 --> 00:14:02,901
maybe 2 million
of the hostages.
287
00:14:13,934 --> 00:14:16,000
Kevin, I was hoping it
wouldn't have to come to this,
288
00:14:16,067 --> 00:14:19,701
but I got some photographs
of you and Elton John.
289
00:14:21,067 --> 00:14:23,367
I think you might
want them back.
290
00:14:23,434 --> 00:14:26,200
I used those as
Christmas cards in '84.
291
00:14:28,000 --> 00:14:30,400
All right. That
was my best shot.
292
00:14:30,467 --> 00:14:31,934
Look, you gotta understand.
293
00:14:32,000 --> 00:14:34,701
I got a lot going on right now.
294
00:14:34,767 --> 00:14:36,467
I...
295
00:14:36,534 --> 00:14:41,067
I had sex with
this woman... Kevin...
296
00:14:41,133 --> 00:14:42,667
And she wants to get pregnant.
297
00:14:44,133 --> 00:14:45,634
She kidnapped my guys.
298
00:14:47,334 --> 00:14:49,667
And she put 'em in the freezer.
299
00:14:49,734 --> 00:14:51,033
That old story.
300
00:14:52,501 --> 00:14:57,000
Oh, uh, James.
Kevin Travis, this is James hobert.
301
00:14:57,067 --> 00:14:58,634
He's the mayor's speech writer.
302
00:14:58,701 --> 00:14:59,667
Hi.
303
00:14:59,734 --> 00:15:01,167
I'm your... uh...
304
00:15:02,434 --> 00:15:05,167
Yours... All your albums...
I...
305
00:15:06,234 --> 00:15:08,167
Anyway, if you're
going to say no,
306
00:15:08,234 --> 00:15:10,100
I dare ya.
Say no to him.
307
00:15:12,434 --> 00:15:14,200
* baby, baby *
308
00:15:14,267 --> 00:15:16,000
* I love ya, baby **
309
00:15:17,300 --> 00:15:19,501
that song changed my life.
310
00:15:19,567 --> 00:15:20,767
Mine, too.
311
00:15:20,834 --> 00:15:22,701
Went double platinum.
I bought an Island.
312
00:15:25,200 --> 00:15:27,400
I'm your biggest fan.
I bought the vest
313
00:15:27,467 --> 00:15:29,300
you wore on your
first tour for $1,000.
314
00:15:29,367 --> 00:15:31,534
Never worn a vest in my life.
315
00:15:33,834 --> 00:15:35,100
Oh, God.
316
00:15:39,834 --> 00:15:42,334
You're meeting with the
lesbian activists tonight.
317
00:15:42,400 --> 00:15:45,434
I've got sister Margaret,
so I was wondering,
318
00:15:45,501 --> 00:15:48,467
what do you say
we trade? Ok?
319
00:15:48,534 --> 00:15:51,167
My nuns for your lesbians.
320
00:15:51,234 --> 00:15:53,734
They're not baseball
cards, Paul.
321
00:15:53,801 --> 00:15:56,467
And besides, what do you
know about lesbians?
322
00:15:56,534 --> 00:15:58,734
What do lesbians know about me?
323
00:15:58,801 --> 00:16:02,000
This could be
a fabulous opportunity.
324
00:16:02,067 --> 00:16:04,067
To remind them
why they're lesbians?
325
00:16:07,868 --> 00:16:11,100
Carrie's on her way. I gotta go.
You all know your assignments.
326
00:16:11,167 --> 00:16:13,834
Carter, Stuart, you're with me.
While I break into her apartment,
327
00:16:13,901 --> 00:16:15,434
you hold the cab,
you the elevator.
328
00:16:15,501 --> 00:16:19,300
Nikki, you are plan "b. "
distract Carrie with these.
329
00:16:19,367 --> 00:16:20,968
Sperm bank pamphlets?
330
00:16:21,033 --> 00:16:23,133
Yeah. It's a list
of donors.
331
00:16:23,200 --> 00:16:25,634
A fool's errand, but see
if you can find somebody
332
00:16:25,701 --> 00:16:27,667
who's got somethin' I don't.
333
00:16:28,934 --> 00:16:30,501
Mike, I didn't get
an assignment.
334
00:16:30,567 --> 00:16:33,400
Yours is the most
important job of all.
335
00:16:33,467 --> 00:16:35,567
You stay here
and look busy. Ok?
336
00:16:37,000 --> 00:16:39,100
I gotta get going.
By my precise calculations,
337
00:16:39,167 --> 00:16:40,767
she should be here
in 5 minutes.
338
00:16:40,834 --> 00:16:42,033
Hi, dad.
339
00:16:42,100 --> 00:16:43,501
Damn this watch.
340
00:16:44,701 --> 00:16:47,767
Hi. Carrie, please,
right this way.
341
00:16:47,834 --> 00:16:49,901
Carter, Stuart, I have
to take this meeting,
342
00:16:49,968 --> 00:16:52,100
so I can't take
the other meeting.
343
00:16:52,167 --> 00:16:55,167
Could you take
that meeting for me?
344
00:16:55,234 --> 00:16:57,834
What meeting? I thought you were
breaking into the apartment.
345
00:16:57,901 --> 00:16:59,801
Now you understand why
your role in the mission
346
00:16:59,868 --> 00:17:01,934
is to stay here and look busy.
347
00:17:02,000 --> 00:17:04,567
Carter, before you go,
348
00:17:04,634 --> 00:17:08,100
I'm begging you, switch with me.
Please! I'll do anything.
349
00:17:10,133 --> 00:17:11,901
I can't believe
you'd rather commit a felony
350
00:17:11,968 --> 00:17:13,567
than talk to some nuns.
351
00:17:13,634 --> 00:17:15,467
Just stand there
while I get my bearings.
352
00:17:15,534 --> 00:17:17,067
I have a very keen
night vision.
353
00:17:17,133 --> 00:17:18,868
In few moments,
it's going to seem
354
00:17:18,934 --> 00:17:20,501
like broad daylight in here.
355
00:17:20,567 --> 00:17:21,667
Does this help?
356
00:17:21,734 --> 00:17:23,501
Ow. Ow.
357
00:17:23,567 --> 00:17:27,067
Ouch. No, my pupils
were fully dilated.
358
00:17:27,133 --> 00:17:29,667
I still can't get over
that outfit.
359
00:17:29,734 --> 00:17:32,334
You can stand and laugh, but when
we're fleeing from the police,
360
00:17:32,400 --> 00:17:34,801
which one of us
will they notice first?
361
00:17:34,868 --> 00:17:37,634
I'm guessin' the guy that looks
like catwoman on steroids.
362
00:17:40,367 --> 00:17:43,601
Come on. Let's get going.
Watch out for your fingerprints.
363
00:17:43,667 --> 00:17:46,434
Don't touch anything.
Just unplug the refrigerator.
364
00:17:46,501 --> 00:17:48,734
When she figures out what
happened, it'll be too late.
365
00:17:48,801 --> 00:17:50,133
I think I got it.
I got it.
366
00:17:53,067 --> 00:17:54,701
Oh. That's not it.
367
00:17:54,767 --> 00:17:56,000
Grab the stuff and let's go.
368
00:17:56,067 --> 00:17:57,868
You grab the stuff.
I paid for the cab.
369
00:17:57,934 --> 00:17:58,868
I picked the lock.
370
00:17:58,934 --> 00:18:00,634
I broke the toaster!
371
00:18:00,701 --> 00:18:02,934
oh, my God.
We're gonna get caught.
372
00:18:03,000 --> 00:18:05,701
Oh, God. I'll never see
the light of day again.
373
00:18:05,767 --> 00:18:06,767
Get the package.
374
00:18:06,834 --> 00:18:07,968
What package?
375
00:18:08,033 --> 00:18:09,968
Aaah! I'm panicking!
376
00:18:10,033 --> 00:18:11,367
Every man for himself!
377
00:18:21,200 --> 00:18:22,968
how'd it go, guys?
378
00:18:23,033 --> 00:18:23,968
Tell him, Paul.
379
00:18:24,033 --> 00:18:25,501
Tell him how you saved the day.
380
00:18:25,567 --> 00:18:27,167
Is this it?
381
00:18:27,234 --> 00:18:29,400
Welcome home, fellas.
382
00:18:29,467 --> 00:18:32,033
Mike, that's frozen yogurt.
383
00:18:33,934 --> 00:18:35,467
Mike, you gotta understand.
384
00:18:35,534 --> 00:18:38,067
Mike, the bad news is you're
going to be a father.
385
00:18:39,834 --> 00:18:42,100
The good news is
we saved you a teaspoon
386
00:18:42,167 --> 00:18:44,367
of this fat-free
frozen dessert treat.
387
00:18:45,701 --> 00:18:46,834
Mike, please.
388
00:18:46,901 --> 00:18:48,033
Understand.
There were sirens
389
00:18:48,100 --> 00:18:50,434
and they kept getting
closer and closer-
390
00:18:50,501 --> 00:18:51,868
and then what happened, Paul?
391
00:18:51,934 --> 00:18:55,000
They kept getting
farther and farther away.
392
00:18:55,067 --> 00:18:58,467
All of you failed
at your assignments.
393
00:18:58,534 --> 00:19:00,467
No, no, no, Mike. Not me.
I'm busy. Busy-busy.
394
00:19:07,400 --> 00:19:08,834
Ok. Now, I know
395
00:19:08,901 --> 00:19:11,000
that you really want to
have a baby with someone,
396
00:19:11,067 --> 00:19:13,901
and I know that you're afraid
you won't find that person.
397
00:19:13,968 --> 00:19:17,000
Hey, I'm afraid, too, but
believe me when I tell you
398
00:19:17,067 --> 00:19:18,801
one day you will,
and you're gonna be
399
00:19:18,868 --> 00:19:22,601
so, so happy that you waited.
400
00:19:28,434 --> 00:19:30,534
Blah, blah, blah.
401
00:19:30,601 --> 00:19:32,133
Blah, blah, blah, blah.
402
00:19:32,200 --> 00:19:33,801
Ok, you're nuts.
403
00:19:40,501 --> 00:19:43,400
you padlocked the freezer.
404
00:19:43,467 --> 00:19:47,133
Fine. I'm taking the
whole thing with me.
405
00:19:53,567 --> 00:19:55,334
could you hold the door for me?
406
00:20:00,434 --> 00:20:03,100
Well, we did it.
407
00:20:03,167 --> 00:20:04,834
How'd we do it?
408
00:20:04,901 --> 00:20:07,567
Sir, he's got a daughter
applying to colleges,
409
00:20:07,634 --> 00:20:09,901
and once he found out my
father was president of Yale,
410
00:20:09,968 --> 00:20:11,901
things just fell into place.
411
00:20:11,968 --> 00:20:14,400
I thought your father
was a pharmacist.
412
00:20:14,467 --> 00:20:16,734
Sir, with all due respect,
do you wanna rock, or what?
413
00:20:19,634 --> 00:20:21,334
Hey, Mike, how'd it go?
414
00:20:21,400 --> 00:20:23,334
Just call me pops.
415
00:20:24,467 --> 00:20:26,334
Can't you feel
the excitement, Mike?
416
00:20:26,400 --> 00:20:29,667
Oh, yeah, sir. A couple of hippies
stumble out of retirement
417
00:20:29,734 --> 00:20:32,234
and pad their investment portfolios.
418
00:20:32,300 --> 00:20:33,968
Whoopee, sir.
419
00:20:34,033 --> 00:20:36,100
This is more than
some old hippies, Mike.
420
00:20:36,167 --> 00:20:37,734
This is Clark,
prado, and Conrad!
421
00:20:37,801 --> 00:20:41,234
No. Those are
your attorneys, sir.
422
00:20:42,934 --> 00:20:46,467
new York city knows
how to rock 'n roll!
423
00:20:46,534 --> 00:20:48,000
And as a thank-you
to our fans,
424
00:20:48,067 --> 00:20:50,367
get ready for the biggest
rock band in history
425
00:20:50,434 --> 00:20:53,634
to give you the biggest light
show in the history of rockdom!
426
00:20:53,701 --> 00:20:55,100
Let's rock!
427
00:20:55,167 --> 00:20:56,567
***
428
00:21:05,133 --> 00:21:09,000
you're not supposed to hold the
lighter up till the end of the show.
429
00:21:09,067 --> 00:21:10,868
That is the end
of the show, sir.
430
00:21:10,934 --> 00:21:12,801
Power's out all over the city.
431
00:21:12,868 --> 00:21:15,133
Everywhere?
It's a tragedy.
432
00:21:15,200 --> 00:21:16,667
I mean, the city can't exist
433
00:21:16,734 --> 00:21:19,501
without its subways and
its traffic lights, its...
434
00:21:19,567 --> 00:21:20,501
Refrigerators.
435
00:21:31,601 --> 00:21:34,334
We've got bigger problems
than melting ice cream, Mike.
436
00:21:35,667 --> 00:21:37,033
I don't, sir.
437
00:21:43,968 --> 00:21:45,767
The power
will be off for a while,
438
00:21:45,834 --> 00:21:47,267
so we should get started.
439
00:21:47,334 --> 00:21:49,567
This administration
is very proud
440
00:21:49,634 --> 00:21:52,634
of its open attitude
towards alternative lifestyles.
441
00:21:52,701 --> 00:21:54,667
Who you choose to share
your bed with
442
00:21:54,734 --> 00:21:56,901
or who you choose
to shower with
443
00:21:56,968 --> 00:22:00,300
or whatever
is entirely your choice.
444
00:22:00,367 --> 00:22:02,767
Consensual sex
is entirely that.
445
00:22:02,834 --> 00:22:05,133
Consensual.
So, enjoy.
446
00:22:07,901 --> 00:22:08,834
Uhh.
447
00:22:10,968 --> 00:22:12,667
I'm sorry.
448
00:22:12,734 --> 00:22:15,000
It's the wrong room.
449
00:22:15,067 --> 00:22:17,634
Sit, ubu, sit.
Good dog.
450
00:22:17,684 --> 00:22:22,234
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