All language subtitles for Spin City s01e08 The High And The Mighty.eng

oh, great. Must be 3:30,
5:30, 7:30, or 9:30 again.

Honey, it's not like
I want this.

I- I need it.
I- I need my sportscenter.

Hey, turn on mtv.

Got it.

Just look at Eddie vedder?

He's only a guy,
and then he starts singing.

I know what you mean, hon.

I feel the same
about Wayne gretzky.

Mike, I don't think
that's possible.

aah! Aah!
What are you doing?

Look at my hands, honey.
Turn it back on.

Honey, this is crazy.

We get one night a week to
spend real time together.

We shouldn't spend it
watching tv.

Yeah. Yeah.

ok, next. Minority
affairs. Carter.

The mayor's having dinner at the
asian alliance fund-raiser.

Play up his record in small
business loans, and bring a fork.

He's not too good
with the, uh...

Mike, I think we all
remember the Sushi incident.

Never thought you could break a
window with a piece of raw fish.

Well, you live, and you learn.

Ok, the next piece
of news. Very exciting.

According to this report,

the crime rate in the
city of new York-

that's here-
is down 30%.

Paul, spread the news.

Have no fear. Captain good news
is on the case.

You know, he's just
getting stranger.

Ok, next up,
the Sharon project.

Oh, no! Oh, no!

You're right.
Just because we were elected to serve

doesn't mean we have to worry

about a retirement center
going bankrupt.

Finally, you're coming around.

We've been trying to drum up support for
buying the Sharon project for weeks.

It's time to throw it away.

I don't throw things away.

That's not who I am.
That's not my style.

It's like with underwear.

It doesn't matter how
tattered or torn a pair get.

As long as that sucker
has a waistband in it,

it stays in the rotation.

It's time-10:00.
Donaldson's never late.

Ok, let's go.

Why are we rolling out the red
carpet for a real-estate developer?

He is the real-estate
developer.

The man is my hero.

You read his book Dan I am?
It's brilliant.

Except for the title,
which he clearly ripped off.

From who?

Think about it in your chair.
Think about it anywhere.

How do I look?

Way too excited.

Oh! Here he comes.
I think you should let me do the talking.

Oh, you do, do you?

Don't get me wrong.

Your "look at me,
I'm so charming" thing

works on most, but
donaldson's ruthless.

He's serious.
He's my people, Mike.

Flaherty, you and me, let's go.

Mr. Donaldson, I'm, uh, I'm pleased
to make your acquaintance.

mr. Donaldson, I'm
pleased to make your acquaintance.

No, actually, I think
Mike and I first met

at a $10,000-a-plate
charity dinner.

I would have bought
dinner, but I'd just

come from a $5,000-a-plate
charity lunch

and I was a little tapped out.

Dan, I'm sorry
to keep you waiting.

No problem, your honor.

Nikki, escort mr. Donaldson
to my office, please?

I'll catch up to you
in a moment.

Mike, I just got off the phone
with speaker rosen, he tells me

you won't get off his case
about this Sharon project.

Well, first off, sir-

I'm sympathetic, Mike, but come on.
You've read the budget.

You know, all my friends
told me that I should,

but I can never get past
the second chapter.

I know it's tough, but there
are bigger battles to be won.

Mr. Mayor, I convinced your yoga
instructor to see you at 5:00.

Yes!

Ok, Mike.

The press gods are restless.

They demand a sacrifice.

All right, if Paul's not
here in one minute,

James, you're going on
in his place.

Please, no, Mike. No, no.
I can't. I'm sorry.

That's ok, James...
Nikki, brief him.

No, no, no.

I can't get any air.

I know, honey.
Now, just try to pay attention.

Ok, home robbery is down 17%.

Car theft is down 28%.

I feel like
I'm being strangled.

Funny.
That's down 12%.

Hey, look who's here.
It's captain good news.

I just went out
to get my morning muffin.

Crime statistics, Paul.

Big news, banner day, safer streets.

I just got mugged.

Oh, my God.

He took everything.

He even took
my crime statistics.

Somewhere in this city,
there's a guy walking around

with my wallet, my cell phone,

and a big pie chart showing
how much crime has dropped.

I'm sure they're all getting
a big laugh out of that

back at the hideout.

Did you get a look at him?
White guy? Black guy?

Big guy. Massive.
So big, he stood in front of me,

I thought it was an eclipse.

Did he have a gun?
No.

A knife?
No.

A comb?

He was just intimidating.

What did he say?

Well, he didn't speak English.

Hey, Paul, you think
there's an outside chance

this guy was just
asking for directions?

I know you guys are
just making jokes

to try and cheer me up,
but it's all right.

Don't you worry, because
I'm not going to be a victim.

Give me those statistics.
I'm going to blow this baby out of the water.

Attaboy, pauly.

Were you just trying
to cheer him up?

Eh!

I finished my coffee.

Good.

I finished my brownie, too.

You want another one?

Yeah. You got $9.00?

I love this place.
I get some of my best writing done here.

All right.

There you go.

"I'm bored. "

It's very creative.

I'm feeling
pretty good about it.

What do you want?

I want those 2
waitresses to huddle up

and tackle those 2 waitresses.

Honey, if you want
to go watch sports,

you can, you know?
Just go home.

It's a tough call.

Hey, mr. Donaldson.

Mike.

What are you doing here?

Me? I own this place.

Well, actually,
I own the whole chain.

Actually, I own a small
pharmaceutical firm

which recently purchased
parts of Colombia.

The big deal here is
that I get free coffee.

Samantha, could I have
a double mochaccino?

Throw some nutmeg
on top of there. Thank you.

Samantha, could I get
a pair of chinos?

Flaherty, I think
you just ordered pants.

Uh, decaf. No pleats.

This isn't really my type
of place, either, you know?

Sometimes I think I just buy
things because I'm bored.

No kidding.

Yeah.

Uh, sir, can you read this?

"I'm bored. "

I think I can help you out.

So let's hear it.

I'm giddy with excitement.

All right, sir.

This is an incredible
business opportunity.

Are you familiar with the
Sharon retirement center?

Yeah.

Ok, so what I'm
proposing is this:

You buy that facility...

And basically, that's
all I'm proposing.

That's a great pitch.

I can have it typed up for you.

How much?

4 million.

That's all?

Because, you know,
I probably got that on me.

Oh, don't tease, sir.

It's not a bad idea, Flaherty.

Fix the place up,
we hike the fees.

Well, no, see,
it would have to be

the same people living
there at the same cost.

Oh, great.

What you're telling me then is,

I basically take
a huge chunk of money

and flush it down the toilet.

I thought you would appreciate
me coming to you first.

I like you, Flaherty.

You, sir, are plucky.

What I want to know is,

what's the mayor's office
getting out of all this?

All right, all right.

We're trying to help people.

All right, I'll take it.

You're kidding.
Really?

Just like that?

Hey, thank you.
Thank you, sir.

Dan.

Dan. Sir Dan.
Like a knight.

I have no idea what I'm saying.

You did pretty good
for yourself, kid.

Pretty good?
I spun you like a top.

I figured it out.

The way to you is through
your heartstrings.

You people think that
rich guys have it so easy.

You go to the market.
At worst, you come home with extra cookies.

Me, I just impulse-bought
a retirement home.

Try explaining that
to the wife.

Thank you very much.

and there he is-

the young deputy mayor
out of fordham.

A victory on the Sharon
senior citizen project.

Tell us about it, Mike.

I just
want to thank the good lord

for giving me the ability
to play this game.

Well,
there you have it.

So donaldson just bought
the Sharon center

out of the goodness
of his heart?

Pretty much.

Well... talk about
your fallen idols.

Pauly, listen, good news
on those crime stats.

Front page of every paper.

I was robbed, Mike.

I know, Paul.
Quit milking it.

No. I mean
I was robbed again.

This time, he got my apartment.

For those of you
keeping score at home,

that's criminals 2, lassiter 0.

Wow. Robbed twice
in 2 days.

Wouldn't that be weird
if it were the same guy?

We live in a city of 8 million people.
Same guy. Right.

When you were mugged,
they got your wallet, right?

What was in there-
cash, credit cards,

maybe something with
your address on it?

My driver's license.
Terrible picture, though.

It was horrible.

What about your keys, Paul?

Well, yeah, but I used
my spare set.

My keys. Oh, my God,
he got my keys.

He knows where I live.
He got my keys.

My bike! My bike!
My bike!

I thought we were going to
watch the game together.

That's what we're doing, honey.

You're in the kitchen.

Anytime anything
exciting happens,

they play it again
in slow-motion.

When that happens, you tell me,

and I'll run right over
to that couch and watch it.

No. You can't watch
a game like that.

You got to sit down.
You got to focus.

Ok.

Hey, did I tell you that my
sister, she's changing-

shh, shh.

There's no-
there's no talking.

But it's a commercial.

Yeah, but I could just tell

you had more than 30 seconds
worth of conversation.

So who are we
voting for-

the blue guys or the red guys?

Well, it's a hockey game,

so it's probably not going
to be decided by a vote.

We-we are,
however, rooting

for the blue guys.

Gotcha.

Ahem.

Hey, you want another beer?

No, I'm ok.

Wait a minute.

How come you can get up, walk
around, and talk and I can't?

Because I'm getting a beer.

Ah, the rules don't apply
when you're getting a beer.

Or food.

So no walking or talking

unless food and/or beer are involved.

I got it.

Oh, boy.

This is great.
I got my beer.

I got my game.
I got my girl.

Couldn't be happier.

Good. I'm so glad.

What are you doing?

Well, I'm sitting here
next to you

watching the game
and not talking.

Besides that.

Paying Bills.

All right, see, ok, this is why

I can't watch a game with you.

Because I'm paying Bills?

You don't even care what's
happening in the game.

It makes no difference
to you who wins or loses.

You have no personal
investment in the outcome.

You know, Mike, I think
the red guys just scored.

No!

You can't tell me you don't
have your own office

because I've seen
pictures of it.

It's much nicer than mine,
it's got a better view,

and the golf course
is magnificent.

This is nice, too, Mike.

What do you call this,
anyway- deputy mayor chic?

What is this, a social call?

Oh, no, no,
much more than that.

Now that
I own the Sharon center,

it's time for a celebration.

To the Sharon center.

To new friends.

To generosity.

To the library annex.

To the empire state building.

I'm not following you.

The new public library annex, Mike-

I'd really like the construction
contract on that.

Well, I can't wait
to get your bid.

Oh. Ha ha!
Oh, that's the thing.

You see, I was kind of
hoping that you'd wait

till all the other bids came in

and you'd let me know
which one was lowest,

and that way I could slide
right in underneath.

I'm-I'm sorry.

I don't-
I don't do, uh...

I can do "safe. "

I can do
"touchdown. "

I can even do
that guy in the box.

Yeah, but if I get
this contract,

I'll have an in for future city
work, and I really want that.

Dan, you know,
I'm not comfortable

making those kinds of deals.

Uh, even for a new friend?

Uh, I'm sorry.
My hands are, uh...

Uh...

Look, you got to do what
you're comfortable with.

After all, you know, comfort's
what it's all about.

For example, I don't really
know how comfortable I am

owning
an old-age home.

I may be a little more comfortable...

Owning a-
I don't know-

minimall...

A vacant lot, perhaps.

So that's what this
has all been about.

Oh, no, no, no, Mike.

This has been a romance.

You're the son I've never had.

Just imagine my surprise to learn
that you were the deputy mayor.

All right, get the
hell out of my office

and take your cheap-
you own a vineyard?

Mike, if I don't get
this contract from you,

I'm going to go right down the
line until somebody else bites,

and in the meantime,
I own this retirement home.

Now, have you ever heard the
sound of a wrecking ball?

Boom!

Gives me goose bumps.

You're a son of a
bitch, you know that?

Guess you didn't play me like
a top after all, did you?

Not many people do.

I can't believe I let
that guy beat me.

You know what, Mike?

Maybe we can find some
dirt on this guy.

Oh, he loves hot dogs.

I always see him
buying them outside.

Well, we've got him,
then, don't we?

Well, it's a starting
point, all right?

Don't you people realize
what you're up against?

Finding dirt won't do any good.

His dirt
just makes him stronger.

Sorry, but it's survival
of the fittest out there.

If we were stranded alone
on a desert Island...

You would eat me.

I like to think so.

Buck up, Mike.

We're the dream team, remember, huh?

We're unbeatable.

Did you really just
tell me to buck up?

Sure did.

Because if you'd added
the words "little camper,"

you'd be fired.

Look. Look at me.
I've been robbed twice in 2 days.

I'm a one-man
crime wave,

but nothing is going to stop
me from feeling like a winner.

Paychecks, everyone!

Oh, goody. You see, now, I'm
going to take that money,

and use it to buy maybe some
furniture, a new coat...

Mama needs a manicure,
pedicure, wax, and facial.

Ok, mama needs to keep
that stuff to herself.

Thanks.

Woo hoo! I can buy...

Nothing good.

Ah.

Excuse me. Excuse me.
You skipped me.

Uh, no, you already got yours.

I did not.
I was standing over there.

No, no, earlier.

Earlier when?

Well, like, about an hour ago.

You were wearing a suit and
a hat with the ear flaps.

You don't remember that?

Oh, yeah, that's right.
I got the check,

went out, cashed it, bought
a new suit, had it altered,

came back here-
all within an hour.

The guy that mugged you,
robbed your apartment,

also picked up your paycheck.

Wow! Ok, you see?
Hey, score one for the criminal, huh?

Ha ha!
Guy's killing me.

I wanted to thank you.

It's always nice when
you get knocked down

to have someone on your
team stand on your neck.

Mike, if it makes you feel any
better, no one expected you to win.

I'm thrilled, stu.
Why don't we go out and get a beer?

If you can't handle it,

maybe you should take
a couple of days off.

I can take care of things.

Boys, what's all the ruckus?

As a taxpayer, I like to think

there are more productive ways

for the mayor's staff
to spend their time.

I say that every day,
mr. Donaldson.

No one can talk and kiss ass
at the same time like you.

I bet you can do it
drinking a glass of water.

Ouch.

That was harsh.

Stuey, you've been dissed.

It's time you and I
took a little walk,

had a nice little talk,

get to know one another.

I really don't like
to be called stuey.

Stuey's fine.

Stuey, do you like
to read books?

You asked to see me?

Uh, yeah. Come in.

Awfully dark in here,
isn't it, Flaherty?

Ha ha ha!
I get it.

You've read chapter 4
of my book:

"How to take control
of a meeting. "

I have no idea

what you're talking about.

Please.
You're backlit.

You've got the letter opener

aimed directly at my heart.

Your hands are
in the power tepee.

You've arranged everything in this
room to make you appear to be

the biggest and most
dominant thing in it.

Ha ha! I did
nothing of the sort.

Comfy?

Yes,
and thoroughly intimidated,

but, you know, I've already
won, so why am I here?

I wanted to give you
a last chance.

To do what, gloat?

To do the right thing.

Are you still
with the old people?

Mike, that ship has sailed.

Those old people are out on a
deck playing shuffleboard.

All right, look-

no, you look, ok?
I don't have time to play with you anymore.

They're awarding that
contract in half an hour.

I think I'm going to
be the lucky one.

Hello, everybody.

Ok, I get it.

We're all playing "let's
hate the billionaire. "

Afternoon, your honor.

Stuart.

What's going on here?

Aha!

What the hell is that?

It's a tape of our little talk.

Dan, if I didn't know
you were the kind of guy

who'd rescue a retirement center
out of the goodness of his heart,

I might have to listen
to this little tape...

Maybe along with some
of our mutual friends...

Or the attorney general, huh?

Ha ha! Yeah.
Have a good day.

I suppose this is where
you say, "touche. "

Well, I don't speak french.

I do speak a little Italian.

Oh!

If any job opportunities
open up,

please keep me in mind, sir.

You're quite an actor, stu.

I mean, you were
very convincing

as the angry, underling
with delusions of grandeur.

A bit of a stretch
for you there.

I did a little theater
in High school-

Caesar...

Guard number 4.

So that was all acting?

I was in the moment.

You're out of it now.

didn't hurt.

Isn't this the same sportscenter
you were watching a few hours ago?

Yeah.

But emotionally I'm in a
completely different place now.

What are you listening to?
Rancid?

Smashing pumpkins?

Rancid pumpkins?

Yeah, that's it.

You know, this is great.

We're doing our own thing,

but we're together.

Yeah. It's called
compromise.

Only one thing would
make it perfect, though.

Please? Ready?

1, 2, 3.

Sit, ubu, sit.
Good dog.

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