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(eerie music playing)
2
00:00:29,878 --> 00:00:33,132
(theme from
( the twilight zoneplaying)
3
00:00:41,440 --> 00:00:44,059
(heartbeat)
4
00:00:59,525 --> 00:01:03,212
andrea moffatt
longs for true love.
5
00:01:03,212 --> 00:01:07,433
a man who is strong,
handsome and exotic.
6
00:01:07,433 --> 00:01:10,369
who desires her
above all other women.
7
00:01:10,369 --> 00:01:14,606
she is about to learn
that naivete has its price
8
00:01:14,606 --> 00:01:19,178
and that the universe has
a very curious sense of humor.
9
00:01:19,178 --> 00:01:22,815
do you have the key
for the other register?
10
00:01:22,815 --> 00:01:24,316
no, try the mouse.
11
00:01:24,316 --> 00:01:25,818
think she had it last.
12
00:01:25,818 --> 00:01:27,319
she's not a mouse.
13
00:01:27,319 --> 00:01:28,320
hamster?
14
00:01:28,320 --> 00:01:30,823
no, wait-- gerbil.
15
00:01:30,823 --> 00:01:31,890
cute and fuzzy?
16
00:01:31,890 --> 00:01:34,359
soft and squishy?
17
00:01:34,359 --> 00:01:37,246
you know, you're wasting
your time with her.
18
00:01:46,705 --> 00:01:47,956
hi.
19
00:01:47,956 --> 00:01:51,226
elaine said you had
the key for register two?
20
00:01:51,727 --> 00:01:53,228
oh, yes, i do.
21
00:01:53,228 --> 00:01:54,346
it's, um...
22
00:01:54,346 --> 00:01:55,514
it's over there.
23
00:01:55,514 --> 00:01:57,382
it's no problem.
24
00:01:59,268 --> 00:02:01,136
andy...
25
00:02:01,136 --> 00:02:04,273
i was wondering if
you're doing anything
26
00:02:04,273 --> 00:02:06,775
uh... after work tonight?
27
00:02:08,644 --> 00:02:11,580
that's nice of you
to ask me.
28
00:02:12,197 --> 00:02:13,899
um... yes, i am.
29
00:02:13,899 --> 00:02:15,150
i'm busy.
30
00:02:15,150 --> 00:02:17,469
but thank you.
31
00:02:23,542 --> 00:02:25,344
squeak, squeak.
32
00:02:28,580 --> 00:02:31,650
you know, you really
shouldn't pass up carl.
33
00:02:31,650 --> 00:02:33,535
he's not such a bad catch.
34
00:02:33,535 --> 00:02:36,655
someone like you
can't afford to be choosy.
35
00:02:36,655 --> 00:02:37,906
quiet, i mean.
36
00:02:37,906 --> 00:02:39,158
i know, but...
37
00:02:39,158 --> 00:02:41,660
he's no prince charming?
38
00:02:41,660 --> 00:02:43,962
honey, there
ain't no such animal.
39
00:02:43,962 --> 00:02:47,716
there are lots of
other kinds of animals.
40
00:02:47,716 --> 00:02:49,585
i can tell you
about them.
41
00:02:49,585 --> 00:02:52,721
there are the ones who would
rather chew their arms off
42
00:02:53,338 --> 00:02:54,590
than stay until morning.
43
00:02:54,590 --> 00:02:56,475
and then, of course,
there are the ones
44
00:02:57,092 --> 00:03:00,229
who expect you to make
breakfast for them as a reward
45
00:03:00,229 --> 00:03:00,896
for their performance.
46
00:03:00,896 --> 00:03:01,597
andrea:
elaine, you said you
47
00:03:02,181 --> 00:03:02,781
were going
to give up those downers.
48
00:03:03,382 --> 00:03:05,000
if they ever catch you...
49
00:03:05,000 --> 00:03:06,151
but they won't,
50
00:03:06,785 --> 00:03:07,970
'cause my dear
sweet friend andrea
51
00:03:07,970 --> 00:03:10,389
is going to watch out for me,
isn't she?
52
00:03:10,389 --> 00:03:12,991
one of these days, it's
going to catch up with you.
53
00:03:12,991 --> 00:03:15,143
if i didn't take these,
i couldn't sleep.
54
00:03:15,143 --> 00:03:16,895
if i couldn't sleep,
i couldn't work.
55
00:03:16,895 --> 00:03:18,680
we wouldn't me to lose
my job, would we?
56
00:03:18,680 --> 00:03:20,299
hmm?
57
00:03:55,667 --> 00:03:57,436
(meow)
58
00:03:57,436 --> 00:03:59,938
oh, hello.
59
00:03:59,938 --> 00:04:01,807
hello, there.
60
00:04:01,807 --> 00:04:06,812
i haven't seen you
around here before.
61
00:04:06,812 --> 00:04:09,314
are you friendly?
62
00:04:09,314 --> 00:04:11,199
oh, you're a big one.
63
00:04:11,199 --> 00:04:13,068
let me see you.
64
00:04:13,068 --> 00:04:14,953
let me see you.
65
00:04:14,953 --> 00:04:16,788
oh, what's the matter?
66
00:04:16,788 --> 00:04:19,291
you don't have a collar, huh?
67
00:04:19,291 --> 00:04:21,627
didn't anyone buy you a collar?
68
00:04:21,627 --> 00:04:23,228
no?
69
00:04:23,228 --> 00:04:27,165
if somebody loved you,
they'd buy you a collar.
70
00:04:29,484 --> 00:04:31,987
there you go, big guy.
71
00:04:31,987 --> 00:04:33,872
like that?
72
00:04:33,872 --> 00:04:35,657
oh, you're thirsty.
73
00:04:35,657 --> 00:04:38,994
don't you make
a habit of it, though.
74
00:04:41,280 --> 00:04:43,782
(shower running)
75
00:04:56,828 --> 00:04:58,930
(meow)
76
00:05:03,085 --> 00:05:04,953
where's the..?
77
00:05:12,244 --> 00:05:14,746
scream if you must.
78
00:05:14,746 --> 00:05:16,982
i've checked out your place.
79
00:05:16,982 --> 00:05:20,485
you've gone to lot of trouble
to isolate yourself.
80
00:05:20,485 --> 00:05:21,903
to hide from the world.
81
00:05:21,903 --> 00:05:23,789
i'm calling the police.
82
00:05:23,789 --> 00:05:25,057
by all means.
83
00:05:26,274 --> 00:05:30,095
tell them that you've seen a man
turn into a cat.
84
00:05:44,109 --> 00:05:45,260
oh!
85
00:05:48,313 --> 00:05:52,501
you really must buy
a better brand of coffee.
86
00:05:52,501 --> 00:05:56,204
now, the turks,they
knew how to brew coffee
87
00:05:56,204 --> 00:05:58,774
even if they were barbarians.
88
00:05:58,774 --> 00:06:01,810
i won't hurt you.
89
00:06:01,810 --> 00:06:04,830
i came from provence
originally,
90
00:06:04,830 --> 00:06:07,065
a long time ago.
91
00:06:07,065 --> 00:06:09,818
i was called
92
00:06:09,818 --> 00:06:12,821
guillaume de marchaud.
93
00:06:12,821 --> 00:06:16,158
i had a great talent
for two things:
94
00:06:16,158 --> 00:06:20,212
singing and making love.
95
00:06:20,212 --> 00:06:24,299
one night, i was caught
making love
96
00:06:24,299 --> 00:06:25,867
to the wrong woman.
97
00:06:25,867 --> 00:06:29,571
or rather, the right woman
at the wrong time.
98
00:06:29,571 --> 00:06:36,778
her husband could do things
you call impossible today.
99
00:06:36,778 --> 00:06:42,167
he cursed me to remain forever
in the form of a cat
100
00:06:42,717 --> 00:06:46,171
only able to become
a man again at night.
101
00:06:46,171 --> 00:06:49,307
but it's not such a curse.
102
00:06:49,307 --> 00:06:53,061
i have spent centuries
loving women.
103
00:06:53,061 --> 00:06:57,349
showing women how to love.
104
00:06:57,349 --> 00:07:00,235
women like you.
105
00:07:03,271 --> 00:07:05,774
if you ask me to go,
106
00:07:05,774 --> 00:07:08,276
i will go.
107
00:07:08,276 --> 00:07:10,162
but i promise you,
108
00:07:10,162 --> 00:07:14,533
you will never see
my like again.
109
00:07:14,533 --> 00:07:22,507
never feel the things that
i alone can make you feel.
110
00:07:26,878 --> 00:07:29,381
this is a dream.
111
00:07:31,133 --> 00:07:34,269
it's a very
nice dream, yes?
112
00:07:34,269 --> 00:07:36,438
yes...
113
00:07:36,438 --> 00:07:38,440
no...
114
00:07:38,440 --> 00:07:40,442
yes, it is.
115
00:07:40,442 --> 00:07:45,647
i just never thought
that it would happen to me.
116
00:07:45,647 --> 00:07:48,316
you are the one,
aren't you?
117
00:07:50,869 --> 00:07:52,404
am i?
118
00:07:53,939 --> 00:07:55,457
yes.
119
00:07:55,457 --> 00:07:57,826
oh, yes.
120
00:08:09,221 --> 00:08:11,223
andrea:
good morning, elaine.
121
00:08:11,223 --> 00:08:12,724
good morning, carl.
122
00:08:12,724 --> 00:08:14,226
elaine:
chipper?
123
00:08:14,226 --> 00:08:15,727
happy?
124
00:08:15,927 --> 00:08:16,995
perky?
125
00:08:16,995 --> 00:08:19,731
the end of the world
is upon us.
126
00:08:20,198 --> 00:08:23,201
have you been drinking
too much coffee again?
127
00:08:23,201 --> 00:08:25,687
nope. i just had a nice night.
128
00:08:25,687 --> 00:08:27,556
good morning, dr. wood.
129
00:09:01,339 --> 00:09:03,842
what's he going to do?
130
00:09:03,842 --> 00:09:06,094
meow at me?
131
00:09:19,174 --> 00:09:23,478
you sure you don't need
some of these?
132
00:09:23,478 --> 00:09:25,664
would you please
put them back?
133
00:09:25,664 --> 00:09:28,683
just trying
to be neighborly.
134
00:09:41,796 --> 00:09:44,282
inventory, carl, huh?
135
00:09:44,282 --> 00:09:46,051
mm-hmm.
136
00:10:12,177 --> 00:10:15,480
(purring)
137
00:10:59,357 --> 00:11:00,358
i am telling you...
138
00:11:00,358 --> 00:11:02,861
nobody changes
that much in a week
139
00:11:02,861 --> 00:11:05,363
unless there's
sex involved.
140
00:11:10,568 --> 00:11:12,937
that's $36.75.
141
00:11:14,572 --> 00:11:17,659
what i'd give to be
a fly on the wall.
142
00:11:17,659 --> 00:11:20,278
as opposed to
a bat in her belfry?
143
00:11:21,863 --> 00:11:24,366
was that a remark?
144
00:11:24,366 --> 00:11:26,668
hi.
145
00:11:26,768 --> 00:11:28,603
how are you?
146
00:11:28,603 --> 00:11:29,854
you know what?
147
00:11:29,854 --> 00:11:32,991
i have something for you.
148
00:11:32,991 --> 00:11:35,410
i have a present.
149
00:11:35,410 --> 00:11:37,278
here it is.
150
00:11:37,278 --> 00:11:39,731
(hissing)
151
00:11:46,821 --> 00:11:49,374
andrea, come here.
152
00:11:55,714 --> 00:11:58,166
what were you thinking of?
153
00:11:58,800 --> 00:12:01,169
what do you think
would have happened
154
00:12:01,169 --> 00:12:05,990
when i tried to become a man
withthisaround my neck?
155
00:12:05,990 --> 00:12:08,493
i'm sorry, guillaume.
156
00:12:09,994 --> 00:12:13,998
i just didn't want anyone
to pick you up as a stray
157
00:12:13,998 --> 00:12:15,500
during the day.
158
00:12:15,500 --> 00:12:17,001
i didn't think.
159
00:12:17,001 --> 00:12:18,636
i haven't survived this long
160
00:12:18,636 --> 00:12:22,857
by letting some fool of a woman
put a collar on me.
161
00:12:22,857 --> 00:12:25,527
no one owns
guillaume de marchaud...
162
00:12:25,527 --> 00:12:27,629
no one.
163
00:12:27,629 --> 00:12:30,281
do you hear?
164
00:12:33,368 --> 00:12:35,954
i'm sorry, guillaume.
165
00:12:37,839 --> 00:12:41,860
i bought some
other things for you.
166
00:12:41,860 --> 00:12:44,112
shirts.
167
00:12:44,112 --> 00:12:45,980
socks.
168
00:12:53,555 --> 00:13:00,345
next time, buy something
that i'll enjoy seeing on you--
169
00:13:00,345 --> 00:13:03,097
silk, satin,
black lace.
170
00:13:03,097 --> 00:13:05,233
you know what i want.
171
00:13:06,951 --> 00:13:08,620
good.
172
00:13:08,620 --> 00:13:10,488
until then,
173
00:13:10,622 --> 00:13:14,225
we shall simply
have to do without.
174
00:13:23,067 --> 00:13:24,319
long lunch.
175
00:13:24,319 --> 00:13:27,438
you've been late
yourself sometimes.
176
00:13:27,438 --> 00:13:29,324
what have we got here?
177
00:13:30,692 --> 00:13:32,193
oh!
178
00:13:32,594 --> 00:13:35,029
who is this for?
179
00:13:35,413 --> 00:13:37,999
is this
for carl baby?
180
00:13:39,651 --> 00:13:42,704
no, carl baby's jaw
is on the floor.
181
00:13:42,704 --> 00:13:45,206
come on, andy,
kiss and tell.
182
00:13:45,206 --> 00:13:47,659
just put it back, please.
183
00:13:56,701 --> 00:13:59,404
i think it's about time
184
00:13:59,404 --> 00:14:04,092
a certain fly made an appearance
on a certain wall.
185
00:14:11,799 --> 00:14:13,668
your coffee.
186
00:14:15,553 --> 00:14:18,673
i have a surprise
for you.
187
00:14:22,977 --> 00:14:26,064
yes, it's very nice.
188
00:14:34,188 --> 00:14:38,576
how many times have i asked you
for one simple thing?
189
00:14:38,576 --> 00:14:42,330
i want something that
a man can stand to drink--
190
00:14:42,330 --> 00:14:45,450
not this sewage water
that you keep serving me.
191
00:14:45,450 --> 00:14:47,335
i'll get some tomorrow.
192
00:14:49,203 --> 00:14:53,207
you will go now...
193
00:14:53,207 --> 00:14:56,961
or i will leave...
194
00:14:56,961 --> 00:14:58,713
for good.
195
00:15:37,819 --> 00:15:38,903
hi.
196
00:15:38,903 --> 00:15:40,922
i'm a friend of andy's.
197
00:15:40,922 --> 00:15:42,423
can i come in?
198
00:15:45,176 --> 00:15:47,545
lately, andy's been so, uh...
199
00:15:47,545 --> 00:15:48,796
tense at work.
200
00:15:48,796 --> 00:15:52,417
i just thought i'd
stop in and see who...
201
00:15:52,417 --> 00:15:55,336
i mean, how she
was getting on.
202
00:15:57,221 --> 00:15:59,641
i've heard
a lot about you.
203
00:15:59,641 --> 00:16:00,758
oh?
204
00:16:00,758 --> 00:16:03,177
nothing bad, i hope.
205
00:16:03,177 --> 00:16:06,197
that depends on what
one means by bad,
206
00:16:06,197 --> 00:16:07,732
does it not?
207
00:16:07,732 --> 00:16:08,983
hmm.
208
00:16:08,983 --> 00:16:13,154
we have 20 minutes
to become acquainted.
209
00:16:16,374 --> 00:16:18,259
(door opening)
210
00:16:20,678 --> 00:16:25,550
elaine:
i think we have to do
this again real soon.
211
00:16:25,550 --> 00:16:28,052
guillaume:
yes.
212
00:16:36,694 --> 00:16:40,365
(car door closes,
engine starts)
213
00:16:47,405 --> 00:16:49,907
you just missed
your friend, elaine.
214
00:16:49,907 --> 00:16:52,860
i know what kind
of a friend she is.
215
00:16:52,860 --> 00:16:53,861
how could you?
216
00:16:53,861 --> 00:16:55,396
i thought you loved me.
217
00:16:55,396 --> 00:16:57,532
spare me the cliches.
218
00:16:57,532 --> 00:17:00,535
this isn't a scene from
one of your silly books.
219
00:17:00,535 --> 00:17:02,253
i've been here too long.
220
00:17:02,253 --> 00:17:03,504
it's time i left.
221
00:17:03,504 --> 00:17:05,390
no, guillaume,
you can't!
222
00:17:05,390 --> 00:17:05,990
i love you.
223
00:17:05,990 --> 00:17:09,093
it is the way of the tomcat.
224
00:17:09,093 --> 00:17:11,713
i've had my fun
and so have you.
225
00:17:11,713 --> 00:17:14,782
love had nothing
to do with it.
226
00:17:16,034 --> 00:17:19,103
you're going to her,
aren't you?
227
00:17:21,422 --> 00:17:23,174
yes.
228
00:17:25,059 --> 00:17:26,828
no.
229
00:17:27,462 --> 00:17:28,713
oh, guillaume,
230
00:17:28,713 --> 00:17:30,581
please...
231
00:17:30,581 --> 00:17:32,400
don't go.
232
00:17:32,400 --> 00:17:33,935
just one more night.
233
00:17:33,935 --> 00:17:35,803
that's all i ask.
234
00:17:35,803 --> 00:17:37,055
please.
235
00:17:43,644 --> 00:17:45,513
all right.
236
00:17:47,148 --> 00:17:49,033
one more night.
237
00:17:50,902 --> 00:17:53,371
i'll make some coffee.
238
00:18:05,233 --> 00:18:08,820
you can't buy me back
with coffee, andrea.
239
00:18:08,820 --> 00:18:11,873
after tonight,
it's over.
240
00:18:16,244 --> 00:18:18,312
yes...
241
00:18:18,312 --> 00:18:20,331
it's over.
242
00:18:23,835 --> 00:18:26,104
your coffee.
243
00:18:51,612 --> 00:18:54,115
strong and bitter...
244
00:18:54,115 --> 00:18:56,767
as i like it.
245
00:18:56,767 --> 00:18:59,770
i'm glad that you like it.
246
00:19:00,271 --> 00:19:03,774
i picked it especially for you.
247
00:19:06,444 --> 00:19:08,613
(phone rings)
248
00:19:10,431 --> 00:19:12,183
hello?
249
00:19:12,183 --> 00:19:14,318
hi, carl.
250
00:19:14,318 --> 00:19:15,820
no, it's okay.
251
00:19:15,820 --> 00:19:18,389
don't worry
about it.
252
00:19:18,389 --> 00:19:20,091
yeah, well, uh...
253
00:19:20,091 --> 00:19:23,094
elaine does things like that.
254
00:19:23,094 --> 00:19:26,831
i haven't seen
a movie in ages.
255
00:19:26,831 --> 00:19:30,268
yeah, friday night,
that would be fine.
256
00:19:30,268 --> 00:19:32,854
sure.
257
00:19:32,854 --> 00:19:34,188
yeah.
258
00:19:34,188 --> 00:19:36,207
i'll see you tomorrow.
259
00:19:36,207 --> 00:19:38,743
yeah, me, too.
260
00:19:38,743 --> 00:19:40,278
bye.
261
00:19:45,833 --> 00:19:48,653
poor andrea...
262
00:19:48,653 --> 00:19:51,155
the injured innocent.
263
00:19:51,155 --> 00:19:55,526
you are no better than
any other woman i've ever known.
264
00:19:55,526 --> 00:19:58,229
you never learn.
265
00:20:00,398 --> 00:20:02,099
you...
266
00:20:05,987 --> 00:20:07,405
you...
267
00:20:27,408 --> 00:20:29,911
oh, but
i did learn.
268
00:20:29,911 --> 00:20:32,013
i won't be weak anymore.
269
00:20:32,013 --> 00:20:34,148
that's the best lesson of all.
270
00:20:34,148 --> 00:20:36,701
i want you to remember that
271
00:20:36,701 --> 00:20:41,239
in case you ever think
of coming back here again.
272
00:20:46,794 --> 00:20:49,080
woman:
have you been
here before?
273
00:20:49,080 --> 00:20:50,331
andrea:
no, i haven't
been here before.
274
00:20:50,331 --> 00:20:52,133
sex?
275
00:20:52,133 --> 00:20:53,251
male.
276
00:20:53,251 --> 00:20:55,403
he's a tomcat.
277
00:20:55,403 --> 00:20:58,105
well then, what can we
do for you today?
278
00:20:59,607 --> 00:21:01,609
i'd like to have him fixed.
279
00:21:01,609 --> 00:21:02,693
(hissing, snarling)
280
00:21:02,693 --> 00:21:06,264
a lesson on
romance versus reality
281
00:21:06,264 --> 00:21:09,650
with a word of warning for
those who want to mix the two--
282
00:21:09,650 --> 00:21:10,901
don't.
283
00:21:10,901 --> 00:21:13,237
or you may find
your head in the clouds,
284
00:21:13,237 --> 00:21:14,488
your feet on the ground,
285
00:21:14,488 --> 00:21:18,242
and the rest of you somewhere
inthe twilight zone.
286
00:21:19,242 --> 00:21:29,242
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