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We were sitting at the pool
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just sunbathing and talking.
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I was a young gay man who was
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questioning all kinds of things.
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We talked about being gay in Hollywood
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and how difficult
it was to have a career.
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And I asked him how he knew
that he was gonna make it,
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because I wasn't sure that I ever would.
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And he told me about a dream that he had.
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He dreamt that there was
a perfectly cut diamond
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sitting on velvet
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in a room that was lit with pin spots.
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And every one of the lights
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were pointed into the center
of the diamond.
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He thought he was the diamond.
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He said, "That's the dream
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"that made me believe
that I could do this.
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That's how I knew
I was gonna be a star."
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- Your name is Roy Fitzgerald?
- That's right.
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Well, come up on our stage, young man.
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This is your life!
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Come along here.
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Hey!
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You see, folks, this young man,
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whose name really is Roy Fitzgerald,
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is known to you and to movie
fans all over the world as...
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Rock Hudson.
Was he the cat's pajamas!
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Pleased to make your acquaintance, ma'am.
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Well, Rock was an icon.
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You couldn't take your eyes
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off Rock on the screen,
you really couldn't.
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Not only was he
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the biggest star at Universal,
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he was by far the
biggest star in Hollywood.
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There was that period
where he was the king.
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The Tom Cruise of his day.
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Women were swooning, men were swooning.
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Rock was everybody's type.
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You couldn't invent a name
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that was better for a heterosexual
leading man than Rock Hudson.
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Not only did women say,
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"That's the man I want to marry,"
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many men said, "That's
the man I'd like to be."
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He was like a granite facade,
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just impenetrable.
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He was a great performer,
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not only in acting, but in life.
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Why aren't you married, Jordan?
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He had more than one world.
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He had the studio world.
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He had this gay world.
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- You'll come?
- I'd be delighted.
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Well, good-o, sport!
54
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I thought I was
the last man in California
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to go to bed with Rock Hudson
when I finally did.
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He was a sort of sexual gladiator.
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The lash for you, betrayer of women.
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He was closeted,
59
00:03:05,727 --> 00:03:08,156
but there was every reason
to be closeted back then.
60
00:03:08,228 --> 00:03:11,691
If the truth had come out, that
would've been the end of his career.
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It's as simple as that.
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The public perception of Rock
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was so very masculine and straight.
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Privately, he was very free.
65
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- He loved to laugh.
- He was also a bit of a devil.
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The people that he had around him
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were very trusted friends.
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I think maybe that's the key.
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People loved him, you know?
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He was just a decent, wonderful guy.
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And that's unusual in Hollywood.
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I hate to say that, but it's true.
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He was a quiet man.
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I think the thing I most remember
him for were his silences.
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It was...
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00:03:56,820 --> 00:03:59,989
...as if he were always
listening to something inside.
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Some voice.
78
00:04:04,119 --> 00:04:06,830
He never talked about it, so...
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I never knew what it was.
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Oh, he was a good man.
81
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He lived as if he were a stranger here.
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I mean, he never let anything touch him.
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Became absorbed in things.
His job mostly.
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He worked hard, he...
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always a look around
his eyes as if he were
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trying to say something.
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I don't know what...
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00:04:33,690 --> 00:04:37,527
protest against what
he'd surrendered his life to.
89
00:04:39,738 --> 00:04:41,656
I never knew what he wanted...
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00:04:41,740 --> 00:04:44,826
...and I don't think
he ever knew.
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00:04:46,077 --> 00:04:48,246
Well, I...
92
00:04:48,288 --> 00:04:50,999
guess I can't tell you
much more. Enough?
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00:04:54,753 --> 00:04:56,588
Should be going.
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Rock Hudson died peacefully
in his sleep from AIDS,
95
00:05:02,761 --> 00:05:05,180
the first well-known person
to publicly acknowledge
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00:05:05,263 --> 00:05:07,025
his struggle with that fatal disease.
97
00:05:07,057 --> 00:05:10,852
He signaled this catastrophe called AIDS,
98
00:05:10,935 --> 00:05:13,563
but Rock was an activist
without knowing it.
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00:05:13,605 --> 00:05:16,358
Since AIDS is primarily a disease
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00:05:16,441 --> 00:05:17,859
associated with homosexuals,
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00:05:17,942 --> 00:05:20,695
talk of Hudson's lifestyle has surfaced.
102
00:05:20,779 --> 00:05:23,615
They needed someone
to say that he was gay,
103
00:05:23,698 --> 00:05:26,993
and the story would be told,
and I didn't want it to be told
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00:05:27,077 --> 00:05:30,955
in the way that the people
in Hollywood wanted it told.
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00:05:36,169 --> 00:05:38,797
This is an interview
with actor Rock Hudson
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taped in his home
in Beverly Hills, California,
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on August 24th, 1983.
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Well, I'm wondering, first of all,
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how an Illinois boy like yourself
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became interested in acting.
111
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I wanted to be an actor all my life.
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That has always hypnotized me.
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Did you have acting training as a boy?
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No. I could never freely say,
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00:06:03,822 --> 00:06:05,824
"I'm going to be an actor
when I grow up."
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00:06:05,865 --> 00:06:06,825
Yeah.
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Because that's sissy stuff.
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You oughta be a policeman or a fireman.
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So I never said anything.
Kept my mouth shut.
120
00:06:12,831 --> 00:06:15,522
Nor did I enter in the drama
society or anything like that.
121
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I had to work all the time,
so I couldn't do
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any form of extracurricular activity.
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00:06:19,838 --> 00:06:21,589
I had to make a living for myself.
124
00:06:21,673 --> 00:06:23,717
And then I went in the Navy
in World War II
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and went back home for a summer,
126
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and I thought, "This place is not for me.
127
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Now is the time
to do what I want to do."
128
00:06:33,727 --> 00:06:37,689
I did know one person in Los Angeles,
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my father.
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My parents divorced,
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00:06:39,733 --> 00:06:41,776
and so he was living out here.
132
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So I came out
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00:06:43,361 --> 00:06:44,738
and stayed with him.
134
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It was very difficult for me
to make friends out here.
135
00:06:47,657 --> 00:06:48,783
Then I got to know
136
00:06:48,867 --> 00:06:51,411
a guy who was an older brother
137
00:06:51,494 --> 00:06:54,247
of a guy I was overseas with.
138
00:06:54,330 --> 00:06:55,687
And it was one of those things,
139
00:06:55,707 --> 00:06:57,792
"If you're ever in Los Angeles,
look me up."
140
00:06:57,876 --> 00:06:59,461
So I called him and he said,
141
00:06:59,544 --> 00:07:00,900
"Come on up
for Sunday dinner."
142
00:07:00,920 --> 00:07:03,798
So I did, met his brother,
who lived in Long Beach,
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00:07:03,882 --> 00:07:06,718
who used to be a radio producer.
144
00:07:06,760 --> 00:07:08,219
He began inviting me down
145
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to his place down in Long Beach.
146
00:07:10,138 --> 00:07:12,349
We became best friends.
147
00:07:12,390 --> 00:07:14,976
Kenneth Hodge was my uncle.
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A man of the arts.
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Somebody that really loved
to help people.
150
00:07:20,106 --> 00:07:22,525
It was never, ever spoken of
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that, you know, he might be gay.
152
00:07:24,611 --> 00:07:27,781
I'd never heard that word
at that point in time.
153
00:07:27,864 --> 00:07:31,159
Being gay was considered,
you know, a neurosis.
154
00:07:31,242 --> 00:07:35,538
It was just a subject that,
uh, that was off the table.
155
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Rock was just getting out of the Navy
156
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and hadn't been into the pictures yet.
157
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So Kenneth was really enthralled with him
158
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and was sort of "love at
first sight," I think for, for Ken.
159
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They were very much lovers.
160
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Kenneth had a big Hollywood job.
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He was a director in radio,
and he had a good network.
162
00:07:57,519 --> 00:08:00,939
He had plenty of people
to introduce Rock to,
163
00:08:01,022 --> 00:08:06,111
and he helped facilitate
some of Rock's early career.
164
00:08:06,778 --> 00:08:09,739
He suggested that
I get some pictures taken
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and send them around to agents.
166
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I said, "What's an agent?"
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Now I'm Midwestern hick.
Please understand.
168
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Not knowing anything at all.
169
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Anyway, I had one response, that's all.
170
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And that was Henry Willson.
171
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Is that right?
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Rock was very ambitious.
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He got scooped up with a big-time agent
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00:08:30,969 --> 00:08:34,764
who really accelerated Rock's career.
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And from what I know is,
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he kind of dropped Ken on the spot.
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I think it ended really abruptly.
178
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I never really saw my uncle
in love again.
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00:08:51,698 --> 00:08:54,367
And I think Rock broke his heart.
180
00:08:59,456 --> 00:09:02,917
And the fella sitting next to
you in the audience down there,
181
00:09:03,001 --> 00:09:04,859
there's the man who gave you that name,
182
00:09:04,919 --> 00:09:07,586
your good friend and personal
manager, Mr. Henry Willson.
183
00:09:07,630 --> 00:09:10,300
Henry, stand up, please,
let the folks see you.
184
00:09:12,260 --> 00:09:15,180
Matter of fact, uh, Henry discovered Rock
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and fostered his rapid rise in pictures.
186
00:09:18,016 --> 00:09:19,216
Mm-hmm.
187
00:09:19,267 --> 00:09:21,936
In the '40s, Henry Willson went to work
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00:09:22,020 --> 00:09:24,564
for David O. Selznick
right after David O. Selznick
189
00:09:24,647 --> 00:09:26,691
finished
"Gone With the Wind."
190
00:09:26,733 --> 00:09:29,194
Henry and Rock met at a party
191
00:09:29,235 --> 00:09:34,532
that this boyfriend-agent
of Rock's took him to.
192
00:09:34,574 --> 00:09:37,160
Rock realized, "I'm going with the guy
193
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who's the head of talent
for Selznick Studios!"
194
00:09:40,705 --> 00:09:43,540
So Rock was one of his first clients,
195
00:09:43,583 --> 00:09:46,211
and there were dozens of other men
196
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who have been completely forgotten,
197
00:09:48,922 --> 00:09:52,759
who had crazy names
like "Race Gentry."
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00:09:52,842 --> 00:09:55,220
You only have to look
at the silent movies,
199
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where you would have
these men like Ramon Novarro
200
00:09:58,890 --> 00:10:00,767
or Rudolph Valentino.
201
00:10:00,850 --> 00:10:03,395
And they were considered
way too effeminate
202
00:10:03,478 --> 00:10:05,397
by the late '30s.
203
00:10:06,106 --> 00:10:08,566
As we come out of World War II,
204
00:10:08,650 --> 00:10:11,611
our icons, particularly in the movies,
205
00:10:11,695 --> 00:10:13,822
become more butch.
206
00:10:13,905 --> 00:10:16,157
A more masculine man
207
00:10:16,241 --> 00:10:19,369
in the stereotypical way took over.
208
00:10:19,411 --> 00:10:23,206
There were all these
photographs of soldiers and sailors.
209
00:10:23,248 --> 00:10:27,460
And so that kind of upped the ante of
210
00:10:27,544 --> 00:10:32,090
this macho quality that
people wanted in a movie star.
211
00:10:32,132 --> 00:10:36,636
And so the physique became more important
212
00:10:36,720 --> 00:10:41,141
and you had more taking off of the shirt.
213
00:10:42,142 --> 00:10:45,395
And that's where Henry
Willson really came in.
214
00:10:45,437 --> 00:10:48,481
He groomed the male stars
215
00:10:48,565 --> 00:10:51,776
to be more butch, frankly.
216
00:10:51,818 --> 00:10:53,486
And he did it with,
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00:10:53,570 --> 00:10:55,051
you know, a number of these guys
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00:10:55,071 --> 00:10:56,823
who were ex-soldiers and sailors,
219
00:10:56,906 --> 00:10:58,950
and Rock Hudson was one of them.
220
00:10:59,034 --> 00:11:01,619
- You are divine.
- I know, but I'm in training.
221
00:11:03,747 --> 00:11:05,123
So then I started
222
00:11:05,206 --> 00:11:06,980
going to class
and going to diction lessons,
223
00:11:07,000 --> 00:11:08,501
learning how to lower my voice,
224
00:11:08,585 --> 00:11:09,941
learning how to horseback ride,
225
00:11:09,961 --> 00:11:11,629
learning anything I could,
226
00:11:11,713 --> 00:11:16,801
'cause something within this
Midwestern hick stupidity of mine
227
00:11:16,843 --> 00:11:19,554
told me that if you're
gonna do something, do it,
228
00:11:19,637 --> 00:11:21,399
and do it the best you can and learn.
229
00:11:21,431 --> 00:11:23,433
I knew that, at least.
230
00:11:23,475 --> 00:11:27,354
Henry Willson was very shrewd in knowing
231
00:11:27,437 --> 00:11:30,273
that if there is even
a trace of effeminacy,
232
00:11:30,315 --> 00:11:32,817
whether it's a giggle or a flutter,
233
00:11:32,901 --> 00:11:34,944
that that's going to read on screen.
234
00:11:34,986 --> 00:11:37,864
He showed them how to do their hair,
235
00:11:37,947 --> 00:11:39,657
what to wear, all of that.
236
00:11:39,699 --> 00:11:42,660
You know, he was a real grooming school.
237
00:11:42,702 --> 00:11:46,706
He taught them how to be heterosexual.
238
00:11:53,838 --> 00:11:56,549
So, Kathleen, I wanted to begin by asking
239
00:11:56,633 --> 00:11:59,594
about the screen test
that you appeared in with Rock.
240
00:11:59,678 --> 00:12:01,179
Oh, yes.
241
00:12:01,221 --> 00:12:03,306
I was just wondering, had you met Rock
242
00:12:03,348 --> 00:12:05,558
prior to appearing in the test with him?
243
00:12:05,642 --> 00:12:07,185
No, I hadn't.
244
00:12:07,227 --> 00:12:09,479
What was your initial impression of him?
245
00:12:09,521 --> 00:12:12,190
Well, he was certainly very handsome...
246
00:12:12,232 --> 00:12:14,693
...no question of that.
247
00:12:14,776 --> 00:12:17,821
And he was very pleasant, very nice.
248
00:12:17,862 --> 00:12:19,552
Honey, I'm gonna tell you something.
249
00:12:19,572 --> 00:12:22,033
You can believe it or not,
but it's the truth.
250
00:12:22,075 --> 00:12:24,911
The last winter of the war
over in Germany...
251
00:12:24,994 --> 00:12:31,042
He did not appeal to me
as a man or as a date.
252
00:12:31,084 --> 00:12:36,047
He was very nice, but I...
there was no spark.
253
00:12:36,131 --> 00:12:39,092
Cut!
254
00:12:39,175 --> 00:12:42,387
I was under contract
with Universal Pictures.
255
00:12:42,429 --> 00:12:44,806
And then I was with them 17, 18 years.
256
00:12:44,848 --> 00:12:47,229
Universal in those days,
it was a wonderful studio.
257
00:12:47,267 --> 00:12:50,395
They took care of everything
for the actor.
258
00:12:50,478 --> 00:12:52,147
The house you live in,
259
00:12:52,230 --> 00:12:53,802
the shopping, your meals, a cook.
260
00:12:53,857 --> 00:12:56,568
It was all done for you.
261
00:12:56,651 --> 00:13:02,240
So that the only thing you had to be
concerned about was your performance.
262
00:13:03,867 --> 00:13:06,036
See that little glint of fear
263
00:13:06,077 --> 00:13:08,705
in his eyes, the insecurity?
264
00:13:08,747 --> 00:13:11,166
Rock and I had both been signed
265
00:13:11,249 --> 00:13:14,002
to be under contract to Universal.
266
00:13:14,085 --> 00:13:16,212
One of the things that we had to do
267
00:13:16,254 --> 00:13:18,298
after we were all under contract was
268
00:13:18,381 --> 00:13:21,259
be a part of a theatrical presentation
269
00:13:21,343 --> 00:13:26,264
for all the studio heads
and producers and agents.
270
00:13:27,098 --> 00:13:30,393
And he'd never been on the stage before.
271
00:13:30,435 --> 00:13:35,357
And, and I saw that he was
physically out of control.
272
00:13:35,440 --> 00:13:38,318
He was just, he
was very much like a child
273
00:13:38,401 --> 00:13:42,113
and just shaking visibly and perspiring
274
00:13:42,155 --> 00:13:45,492
and looked like he
couldn't stand on his feet.
275
00:13:45,575 --> 00:13:49,496
And I embraced him, and I
held him like I was his mother
276
00:13:49,579 --> 00:13:54,959
and tried to infuse
some strength in him, courage.
277
00:13:55,043 --> 00:13:57,128
But he was so frightened.
278
00:13:58,672 --> 00:14:01,424
My best friend at the time,
279
00:14:01,466 --> 00:14:04,636
who was also under contract, Susan Cabot.
280
00:14:04,719 --> 00:14:07,055
Well, she was always telling me
281
00:14:07,138 --> 00:14:09,224
how madly in love with him she was.
282
00:14:09,307 --> 00:14:14,354
And she told me that he took
her home to meet his mother once.
283
00:14:14,437 --> 00:14:18,358
She was really hoping to end up with him.
284
00:14:18,441 --> 00:14:22,487
And I had already heard that he was gay.
285
00:14:22,570 --> 00:14:27,409
And I said, "Um, I don't
think it's gonna happen."
286
00:14:27,492 --> 00:14:30,995
"Oh, yes, yes.
It's just got to happen."
287
00:14:31,079 --> 00:14:33,957
Well, it didn't happen.
288
00:14:33,998 --> 00:14:35,959
I can't marry you.
289
00:14:36,001 --> 00:14:38,878
Why not, darling?
Why not?
290
00:14:42,924 --> 00:14:46,386
For a moment, I, I forgot what I am.
291
00:14:50,265 --> 00:14:52,017
There's a womanizer
292
00:14:52,100 --> 00:14:53,977
and Henry Willson was a manizer.
293
00:14:54,019 --> 00:14:57,939
And he was pretty straightforward about,
294
00:14:58,023 --> 00:15:01,192
"Well, I'll sign you
and you'll sleep with me,"
295
00:15:01,234 --> 00:15:04,529
and there was even kind of
negotiations that went on,
296
00:15:04,612 --> 00:15:08,283
and he quickly
gained a reputation for it.
297
00:15:08,366 --> 00:15:12,454
And young, good-looking men went to him
298
00:15:12,537 --> 00:15:16,708
using their sex to be signed by him.
299
00:15:16,750 --> 00:15:18,376
They knew what they were doing.
300
00:15:18,460 --> 00:15:21,463
I don't think, when it came to sex,
301
00:15:21,546 --> 00:15:26,301
Rock was ever innocent by
the time he arrived in Hollywood.
302
00:15:26,384 --> 00:15:29,554
The next time we saw Roy
was over a week later,
303
00:15:29,596 --> 00:15:31,578
only you wouldn't know
it was the same man.
304
00:15:31,598 --> 00:15:32,891
Hello.
305
00:15:32,974 --> 00:15:35,226
In 1951, Henry Willson
306
00:15:35,310 --> 00:15:38,104
introduces his most
promising client, Rock Hudson,
307
00:15:38,188 --> 00:15:41,649
to an aspiring actor named Bob Preble.
308
00:15:42,525 --> 00:15:45,570
Soon these two eligible
bachelors are living together
309
00:15:45,653 --> 00:15:50,367
in a one-bedroom house
off Mulholland Drive.
310
00:15:52,243 --> 00:15:55,538
"Photoplay" magazine
publishes this article,
311
00:15:55,580 --> 00:15:58,165
and we're allowed
to peek through the window,
312
00:15:58,249 --> 00:16:02,921
as it were, into Rock
and Bob's private sanctuary.
313
00:16:05,006 --> 00:16:10,595
What's being depicted is almost
sort of like this marital intimacy.
314
00:16:10,679 --> 00:16:15,016
And yet every effort is made
to portray Rock and Bob as like
315
00:16:15,100 --> 00:16:17,352
wholesome all-American boys.
316
00:16:17,435 --> 00:16:20,271
Preble later admitted
to some quote, unquote,
317
00:16:20,313 --> 00:16:21,940
"experimenting" with Rock
318
00:16:21,981 --> 00:16:24,067
when they were roommates.
319
00:16:24,109 --> 00:16:25,715
But "Photoplay" magazine
would have us believe
320
00:16:25,735 --> 00:16:28,738
that the only reason these
two hunks are living together
321
00:16:28,780 --> 00:16:30,615
is to save a buck.
322
00:16:31,616 --> 00:16:34,994
Look, baby, there's no strings on me.
323
00:16:35,078 --> 00:16:36,913
I do what I like.
324
00:16:36,955 --> 00:16:39,249
And the same thing goes for you.
325
00:16:41,960 --> 00:16:43,628
And we got music.
326
00:16:52,470 --> 00:16:56,975
In 1951, Rock meets
fellow actor George Nader
327
00:16:57,058 --> 00:17:02,689
and Nader's long-term partner,
Mark Miller.
328
00:17:02,772 --> 00:17:04,398
And for the next 34 years,
329
00:17:04,482 --> 00:17:07,609
this trio is virtually inseparable.
330
00:17:08,236 --> 00:17:11,196
The bond is forged through,
you know, things like
331
00:17:11,281 --> 00:17:13,366
a similar sense of humor
332
00:17:13,450 --> 00:17:16,286
and this tendency towards mischief.
333
00:17:16,327 --> 00:17:20,623
There's also this shared
misery of the closet.
334
00:17:20,665 --> 00:17:25,337
There are countless lovers,
short-term boyfriends,
335
00:17:25,420 --> 00:17:30,675
and weekend flings that pass
through Rock Hudson's life.
336
00:17:30,717 --> 00:17:35,138
But the friendship with Nader
and Miller endured.
337
00:17:37,515 --> 00:17:39,517
Ain't he the sweetest
player you ever saw?
338
00:17:39,559 --> 00:17:41,353
He is not.
339
00:17:42,020 --> 00:17:45,482
I think that Hudson was regarded
340
00:17:45,523 --> 00:17:49,486
as a big, strong, handsome guy.
341
00:17:49,527 --> 00:17:53,198
And the natural instinct was to put him
342
00:17:53,281 --> 00:17:56,951
in a lot of cheap adventure films.
343
00:17:57,035 --> 00:18:00,663
It took time for the studio to see
344
00:18:00,747 --> 00:18:04,209
that what they really had there
345
00:18:04,250 --> 00:18:05,960
was a subtler actor
346
00:18:06,044 --> 00:18:07,545
than they ever guessed.
347
00:18:07,962 --> 00:18:09,923
Johash! The horses!
348
00:18:14,052 --> 00:18:15,387
Yes, here they are,
349
00:18:15,428 --> 00:18:17,389
those wild and wonderful '20s,
350
00:18:17,472 --> 00:18:19,557
the years of speakeasies and hot jazz.
351
00:18:38,243 --> 00:18:40,684
- Will I see you tonight?
- You bet, Millie, 8 o'clock.
352
00:18:40,704 --> 00:18:42,686
- There's a good... Yes, sir.
- A double bromo.
353
00:18:42,706 --> 00:18:44,749
One double bromo.
There's a good movie...
354
00:18:44,791 --> 00:18:47,419
I personally felt
that part was beneath him.
355
00:18:47,502 --> 00:18:49,587
I thought he was miscast.
356
00:18:49,629 --> 00:18:53,091
You know, he was a 6'4" hunk,
357
00:18:53,174 --> 00:18:55,969
and to be playing lines
358
00:18:56,052 --> 00:18:58,555
that belonged in a teenager's mouth.
359
00:18:58,596 --> 00:19:01,099
Watch me!
One strawberry surprise.
360
00:19:01,766 --> 00:19:05,937
I just thought it was beneath
him, and he was a good sport.
361
00:19:06,438 --> 00:19:09,566
Did you know that
in the drugstore scenes, uh...
362
00:19:09,607 --> 00:19:11,443
Is it the young Jimmy Dean?
363
00:19:11,484 --> 00:19:13,341
Yeah, yeah. He was
sitting at the counter.
364
00:19:13,361 --> 00:19:15,864
Nobody paid any attention,
nobody knew him then.
365
00:19:15,947 --> 00:19:18,680
Two scoops of vanilla ice
cream, one mixed up with the rest.
366
00:19:18,700 --> 00:19:20,201
And, uh, one floating.
367
00:19:57,072 --> 00:19:58,948
Film producer Ross Hunter,
368
00:19:58,990 --> 00:20:01,848
who not only is one of the most
successful producers in town,
369
00:20:01,868 --> 00:20:03,787
but one of the best liked.
370
00:20:03,828 --> 00:20:07,103
I believe in, you know, authenticity,
real flowers and real paintings.
371
00:20:07,123 --> 00:20:10,210
And there's a million dollars'
worth of jewels here tonight.
372
00:20:10,835 --> 00:20:13,505
The studio asked,
"What would you like to do?"
373
00:20:13,546 --> 00:20:15,737
And I said, "Well,
I would like to do something
374
00:20:15,799 --> 00:20:18,301
"that I believe is very much
needed in this industry,
375
00:20:18,343 --> 00:20:19,658
and that is
to bring back glamor."
376
00:20:19,678 --> 00:20:22,347
So I said,
"Let's do some love stories."
377
00:20:31,606 --> 00:20:35,235
I only can say I smelled something
378
00:20:35,318 --> 00:20:37,696
interesting in the film.
379
00:20:37,737 --> 00:20:41,783
Something which
I would call metaphysical.
380
00:20:41,866 --> 00:20:45,203
You know, it's very strange
knowing you only like this.
381
00:20:45,245 --> 00:20:47,580
So well, it seems, and...
382
00:20:47,664 --> 00:20:49,457
and yet...
383
00:20:50,375 --> 00:20:52,419
I've never seen your face.
384
00:20:52,502 --> 00:20:55,296
The studio thought my ideas were crazy.
385
00:20:55,380 --> 00:20:57,340
I told them that I believe strongly
386
00:20:57,382 --> 00:20:59,175
in a man called Rock Hudson.
387
00:20:59,217 --> 00:21:01,886
And I would like to be able
388
00:21:01,928 --> 00:21:05,682
to use him as the young man
in "Magnificent Obsession."
389
00:21:05,724 --> 00:21:09,102
He's a good-looking, clean-cut man
390
00:21:09,185 --> 00:21:11,479
that young people all over the world
391
00:21:11,563 --> 00:21:13,356
will fantasize about.
392
00:21:14,649 --> 00:21:17,402
Oh, I'm so glad you're here.
393
00:21:17,444 --> 00:21:19,696
You must have known
how much I need you now.
394
00:21:19,738 --> 00:21:21,031
Darling.
395
00:21:21,072 --> 00:21:22,490
Ross Hunter is kind of
396
00:21:22,574 --> 00:21:24,409
the one that clues into the fact
397
00:21:24,451 --> 00:21:27,370
that Rock is Prince Charming.
398
00:21:27,412 --> 00:21:30,123
You know, let's put him in some
399
00:21:30,206 --> 00:21:32,876
glossy romantic melodramas.
400
00:21:32,917 --> 00:21:35,378
That proved to be the winning formula
401
00:21:35,420 --> 00:21:37,547
for the beginning of Rock's career.
402
00:21:37,589 --> 00:21:41,217
I love you, and I wanna marry you.
403
00:21:41,259 --> 00:21:43,261
Oh, the picture was probably
404
00:21:43,345 --> 00:21:44,888
one of the biggest moneymakers
405
00:21:44,971 --> 00:21:46,431
that Universal had ever had.
406
00:21:46,514 --> 00:21:49,434
Rock Hudson became a star,
407
00:21:49,517 --> 00:21:52,771
just on account of this film.
408
00:21:52,854 --> 00:21:57,108
Based on votes of moviegoers
all over the nation,
409
00:21:57,192 --> 00:21:58,693
most popular actor of the year.
410
00:22:00,612 --> 00:22:03,198
Rock, take another bow.
Take another bow.
411
00:22:03,281 --> 00:22:05,950
Take a bow, just take a bow.
412
00:22:09,245 --> 00:22:12,123
- Aren't you Mrs. Ricky Ricardo?
- Yeah... Yes.
413
00:22:12,207 --> 00:22:13,917
- Well, I'm Rock Hudson.
- Oh, yeah.
414
00:22:13,958 --> 00:22:16,544
Well, I know that.
415
00:22:16,628 --> 00:22:19,089
W ell, this is the second year in a row
416
00:22:19,130 --> 00:22:21,466
that Mr. Hudson has been
picked by "Modern Screen"
417
00:22:21,549 --> 00:22:23,593
as most popular actor.
418
00:22:23,635 --> 00:22:25,637
Top honors for a top star.
419
00:22:39,317 --> 00:22:42,529
But I'd be running away if I turn
my back on everything I've known.
420
00:22:42,612 --> 00:22:45,699
Ron. Isn't it enough
that we love each other?
421
00:22:47,992 --> 00:22:51,579
No, Cary, it isn't.
422
00:23:00,505 --> 00:23:02,340
Sirk is German.
423
00:23:02,382 --> 00:23:04,300
He's making these movies
424
00:23:04,342 --> 00:23:10,515
as an outsider about our American values
425
00:23:10,557 --> 00:23:13,018
and kind of poking holes in them.
426
00:23:13,101 --> 00:23:15,687
Their lives were worlds apart.
427
00:23:15,770 --> 00:23:18,732
Cary's world was bound
by the country club set,
428
00:23:18,815 --> 00:23:21,609
their smug pretensions
and their spiteful gossip.
429
00:23:21,693 --> 00:23:23,695
Ron's world was boundless.
430
00:23:23,737 --> 00:23:26,239
The great outdoors, the things that grow
431
00:23:26,322 --> 00:23:28,408
and real people who give and take
432
00:23:28,491 --> 00:23:29,659
all that heaven allows
433
00:23:29,701 --> 00:23:31,619
of love and happiness.
434
00:23:35,373 --> 00:23:39,085
Sirk created a signature style,
435
00:23:39,169 --> 00:23:41,379
which is, it's so beautiful,
436
00:23:41,421 --> 00:23:44,549
but if you look underneath the surface,
437
00:23:44,632 --> 00:23:46,801
under the white picket fences,
438
00:23:46,885 --> 00:23:51,890
you're gonna see how torrid
and ugly everything is.
439
00:23:51,973 --> 00:23:54,059
- Howard, you're drunk.
- Why, Cary!
440
00:23:54,100 --> 00:23:56,603
Isn't one man enough for you?
441
00:23:56,686 --> 00:23:59,230
Maybe you'd better stay
right where you are.
442
00:23:59,606 --> 00:24:01,733
Rock Hudson is just a...
443
00:24:01,816 --> 00:24:06,529
a perfect example of a male Adonis,
444
00:24:06,571 --> 00:24:11,242
but he's also sensitive,
well-rounded guy.
445
00:24:11,284 --> 00:24:16,081
You know, he's not strictly
a sex object for Jane Wyman.
446
00:24:16,790 --> 00:24:22,504
He was the perfect man
for women of that era
447
00:24:22,587 --> 00:24:26,424
that maybe were trapped
in lonely marriages
448
00:24:26,466 --> 00:24:30,303
with insensitive, unfeeling men.
449
00:24:30,762 --> 00:24:33,598
Look, Mick, I told her that I love her.
450
00:24:33,682 --> 00:24:35,682
I asked her to marry me.
I can't force her.
451
00:24:35,725 --> 00:24:37,207
She has to make up her own mind.
452
00:24:37,227 --> 00:24:40,397
She doesn't wanna make up
her own mind, no girl does.
453
00:24:40,438 --> 00:24:42,128
She wants you to make it up for her.
454
00:24:42,148 --> 00:24:43,817
Come on, let's go.
455
00:24:44,275 --> 00:24:51,032
Rock Hudson is playing
a man called Rock Hudson,
456
00:24:51,116 --> 00:24:57,288
who is the personification of Americana.
457
00:25:01,543 --> 00:25:04,254
The identity was given to him...
458
00:25:06,464 --> 00:25:10,802
...and he slipped into it and he
played it for the rest of his life.
459
00:25:20,145 --> 00:25:22,669
This is the biggest thing
that's ever happened to you.
460
00:25:22,731 --> 00:25:24,274
- Yeah?
- Yeah.
461
00:25:24,315 --> 00:25:26,631
That's why it was such a hurry
for me to get over here
462
00:25:26,651 --> 00:25:27,777
and clean up your image.
463
00:25:27,819 --> 00:25:29,821
What's wrong with my image?
464
00:25:29,863 --> 00:25:32,554
You make it sound like I've just
been named Leper of the Year.
465
00:25:32,574 --> 00:25:34,139
Well, you know
the mentality of that board,
466
00:25:34,159 --> 00:25:36,016
they're hipped on the idea
of a corporate image,
467
00:25:36,036 --> 00:25:38,913
solid American gentry,
family respectability.
468
00:25:38,997 --> 00:25:41,813
For their top executives, there are
not 10 commandments, only one:
469
00:25:41,833 --> 00:25:44,627
"Thou shalt be married,
happily and respectably married."
470
00:25:44,669 --> 00:25:46,693
- Whether you like it or not.
- That's right.
471
00:25:46,713 --> 00:25:48,361
From now on you're gonna have a new look.
472
00:25:48,381 --> 00:25:50,008
No more gay married bachelor.
473
00:25:50,091 --> 00:25:52,677
It's got to be Carter Harrison,
family man.
474
00:25:53,470 --> 00:25:55,680
♪ Maybe I'm right ♪
475
00:25:55,722 --> 00:25:59,351
♪ And maybe I'm wrong ♪
476
00:25:59,434 --> 00:26:01,811
♪ Maybe I'm weak ♪
477
00:26:01,853 --> 00:26:04,439
♪ And maybe I'm strong ♪
478
00:26:04,522 --> 00:26:06,733
♪ But nevertheless ♪
479
00:26:06,816 --> 00:26:09,861
♪ I'm in love... ♪
480
00:26:09,903 --> 00:26:12,322
By the late 1950s,
481
00:26:12,405 --> 00:26:14,741
Rock Hudson had really arrived.
482
00:26:14,824 --> 00:26:17,869
Rock's great popularity as a matinee idol
483
00:26:17,952 --> 00:26:20,205
poses this significant problem
484
00:26:20,246 --> 00:26:22,707
for his handlers and studio executives.
485
00:26:22,791 --> 00:26:25,335
On the screen, he's wooing women
486
00:26:25,377 --> 00:26:27,170
like Jane Wyman and Piper Laurie
487
00:26:27,212 --> 00:26:29,839
and the fans are really eating it up.
488
00:26:29,881 --> 00:26:32,050
But he's nearly 30 years old
489
00:26:32,133 --> 00:26:34,803
and he's sort of suspiciously unmarried.
490
00:26:34,886 --> 00:26:36,721
♪ ...with you ♪
491
00:26:36,805 --> 00:26:39,224
In the days when you
were working with Rock,
492
00:26:39,307 --> 00:26:41,539
the fan magazines like
"Photoplay" and "Modern Screen"
493
00:26:41,559 --> 00:26:42,759
started to print articles
494
00:26:42,811 --> 00:26:44,729
in which Betty Abbott was described
495
00:26:44,813 --> 00:26:46,481
as "Rock Hudson's best girl."
496
00:26:46,564 --> 00:26:47,691
Oh, I know.
497
00:26:47,732 --> 00:26:49,401
We would laugh our heads off.
498
00:26:49,442 --> 00:26:51,903
I mean, it was publicity.
499
00:26:51,986 --> 00:26:55,198
I mean, we knew
what they were trying to do
500
00:26:55,240 --> 00:26:56,991
and we'd sit there and laugh it off.
501
00:26:57,075 --> 00:26:59,077
♪ A life of regret... ♪
502
00:26:59,119 --> 00:27:02,580
No one cared what
you really did in Hollywood.
503
00:27:02,622 --> 00:27:05,917
It's just as long as you played along
504
00:27:05,959 --> 00:27:09,921
and you presented a facade to the public.
505
00:27:10,005 --> 00:27:14,884
So living with another man is
not kind of playing the game.
506
00:27:14,926 --> 00:27:18,221
Playing the game is getting married.
507
00:27:18,263 --> 00:27:20,724
♪ But nevertheless ♪
508
00:27:20,765 --> 00:27:23,476
♪ I'm in love ♪
509
00:27:23,560 --> 00:27:25,270
♪ With ♪
510
00:27:25,353 --> 00:27:29,107
♪ You ♪
511
00:27:29,149 --> 00:27:31,109
It's about time
you got hitched, isn't it?
512
00:27:33,236 --> 00:27:34,612
No, I...
513
00:27:34,654 --> 00:27:36,906
I have trouble enough finding oil.
514
00:27:37,949 --> 00:27:40,702
Enter Phyllis Gates.
515
00:27:40,785 --> 00:27:43,621
Not only is she
Henry Willson's secretary,
516
00:27:43,705 --> 00:27:45,957
but she's really heaven sent.
517
00:27:46,041 --> 00:27:48,460
It's like direct from central casting
518
00:27:48,543 --> 00:27:50,462
to play Mrs. Rock Hudson.
519
00:27:50,545 --> 00:27:53,423
In November of 1955,
520
00:27:53,465 --> 00:27:55,050
Rock and Phyllis are married
521
00:27:55,133 --> 00:27:57,802
at the Biltmore Hotel in Santa Barbara.
522
00:27:57,886 --> 00:28:00,764
The ceremony took place only eight days
523
00:28:00,805 --> 00:28:03,308
before Hudson's 30th birthday.
524
00:28:03,350 --> 00:28:05,935
And not surprisingly, Henry Willson,
525
00:28:05,977 --> 00:28:08,980
the omnipresent, tended to every detail.
526
00:28:09,022 --> 00:28:11,649
Though he does stop short
of joining the newlyweds
527
00:28:11,691 --> 00:28:13,943
when they honeymoon in the Caribbean.
528
00:28:13,985 --> 00:28:16,780
I tend to believe that it was arranged,
529
00:28:16,863 --> 00:28:20,158
that Henry Willson paired off
an essentially gay man
530
00:28:20,200 --> 00:28:23,995
and a woman rumored to be bi
or gay herself.
531
00:28:24,079 --> 00:28:26,456
Both participants may have
agreed to play house
532
00:28:26,498 --> 00:28:30,251
in the name of keeping
Hudson's career blazing.
533
00:28:30,335 --> 00:28:32,921
Oh, it was totally engineered by Henry.
534
00:28:32,962 --> 00:28:37,967
You know, and the, the thing
that was such a joke about it
535
00:28:38,009 --> 00:28:41,096
is that Rock didn't look any further
536
00:28:41,179 --> 00:28:43,139
than his agent's secretary.
537
00:28:44,182 --> 00:28:48,687
In some ways, Rock is
the most successful creation
538
00:28:48,770 --> 00:28:50,939
of that golden age of Hollywood,
539
00:28:51,022 --> 00:28:54,859
the last of those
really manufactured stars
540
00:28:54,943 --> 00:28:56,069
where every aspect
541
00:28:56,152 --> 00:28:59,739
of what we think to be their private life
542
00:28:59,823 --> 00:29:03,368
has been built by other people.
543
00:29:11,084 --> 00:29:13,753
I like to lean upon a director,
544
00:29:13,837 --> 00:29:17,841
and if I can't lean on him,
I'm rather lost.
545
00:29:17,882 --> 00:29:19,968
And I am forced to rely on myself.
546
00:29:20,051 --> 00:29:22,846
And that's not a comfortable feeling.
547
00:29:29,519 --> 00:29:32,230
When the opportunity came for you to work
548
00:29:32,272 --> 00:29:33,920
with George Stevens, what was your...?
549
00:29:33,940 --> 00:29:36,192
Oh, well, scrape me off the ceiling.
550
00:29:36,234 --> 00:29:38,403
I mean, the thrill of a lifetime for me.
551
00:29:38,486 --> 00:29:40,613
But it was really
true what everybody said,
552
00:29:40,697 --> 00:29:43,575
make yourself a piece of putty
and put yourself in his hands
553
00:29:43,616 --> 00:29:45,201
and rely on him.
554
00:29:46,119 --> 00:29:49,414
George Stevens is one of those classic
555
00:29:49,497 --> 00:29:51,249
American filmmakers,
556
00:29:51,332 --> 00:29:54,002
and no story I know is
as big as "Giant."
557
00:29:54,085 --> 00:29:56,171
It spans so many decades.
558
00:29:56,254 --> 00:29:59,299
It spans so many sensibilities.
559
00:29:59,382 --> 00:30:04,971
Just the photography alone
is so magnificent.
560
00:30:05,055 --> 00:30:08,892
I've probably seen "Giant"
hundreds of times.
561
00:30:09,434 --> 00:30:11,436
I lost one friend I had in this place
562
00:30:11,519 --> 00:30:13,104
and I know it too.
563
00:30:13,188 --> 00:30:15,315
So I quit. I'm dead quit.
564
00:30:15,398 --> 00:30:17,130
Don't have to say another word to me.
565
00:30:17,150 --> 00:30:18,735
Nobody's firing you, Jett.
566
00:30:18,777 --> 00:30:21,446
What kind of memories
do you have of James Dean?
567
00:30:21,488 --> 00:30:25,283
George used Jimmy because
Jimmy was new and hot.
568
00:30:25,367 --> 00:30:27,494
- Mm-hmm. Yes.
- Hot-hot.
569
00:30:27,577 --> 00:30:30,747
I didn't particularly
like him, personally.
570
00:30:30,789 --> 00:30:32,170
- Would you excuse me?
- Sure.
571
00:30:32,207 --> 00:30:34,017
I'm wanna go get a pack of cigarettes.
572
00:30:37,003 --> 00:30:38,505
According to some accounts,
573
00:30:38,588 --> 00:30:42,342
James Dean was
rather disdainful of Hudson.
574
00:30:42,884 --> 00:30:45,053
Dean considered it hypocritical
575
00:30:45,136 --> 00:30:48,640
that Rock was maintaining
this hetero facade in public
576
00:30:48,723 --> 00:30:51,059
while privately hitting on Dean,
577
00:30:51,142 --> 00:30:53,019
if we're to believe the rumor mill.
578
00:30:53,103 --> 00:30:56,690
Some might say that that's a case
of the pot calling the kettle black.
579
00:30:56,773 --> 00:31:00,402
You know, it's pretty well
documented that early in his career,
580
00:31:00,485 --> 00:31:04,030
James Dean was kept
by a gay radio executive
581
00:31:04,114 --> 00:31:07,575
who was indeed friends with
Rock's agent, Henry Willson.
582
00:31:07,659 --> 00:31:10,328
If you're talking
about shrouded sexuality,
583
00:31:10,412 --> 00:31:12,330
they weren't all that different.
584
00:31:12,372 --> 00:31:14,416
While we're talking about James Dean,
585
00:31:14,499 --> 00:31:16,690
I don't know whether you had
anything else you wanted to...
586
00:31:16,710 --> 00:31:19,713
As I say, I didn't like
the fella too much.
587
00:31:19,796 --> 00:31:22,132
I don't know as I should say any more.
588
00:31:22,173 --> 00:31:24,364
Uh, Jimmy was dead
before the picture was over.
589
00:31:24,384 --> 00:31:27,262
- Yes.
- I don't like to talk against anybody.
590
00:31:27,345 --> 00:31:29,305
And I don't like to talk
against the dead.
591
00:31:29,347 --> 00:31:31,516
- Mm-hmm.
- So I think I should shut up.
592
00:31:31,599 --> 00:31:33,351
Yeah, all right. Okay.
593
00:31:33,435 --> 00:31:35,979
Where do you think you're
going with my automobile?
594
00:31:36,021 --> 00:31:37,856
Just hold on.
595
00:31:37,939 --> 00:31:42,444
Hudson has definite negative
feelings about James Dean,
596
00:31:42,527 --> 00:31:45,363
but those feelings are sharply contrasted
597
00:31:45,447 --> 00:31:49,659
with how much he loved and
cherished leading lady Elizabeth Taylor.
598
00:31:49,701 --> 00:31:51,327
I'm a tough Texian.
599
00:31:51,369 --> 00:31:54,039
It never ceases to amaze me
about Rock Hudson,
600
00:31:54,122 --> 00:31:56,041
how fully he gives himself
601
00:31:56,082 --> 00:31:58,793
to these heterosexual romances.
602
00:32:00,670 --> 00:32:04,132
I mean, that scene when
they wake up on the train,
603
00:32:04,215 --> 00:32:07,218
they've been fucking from
Maryland all the way, you know,
604
00:32:07,302 --> 00:32:10,513
to Texas, and I believe it!
605
00:32:11,181 --> 00:32:12,974
What's that? A wolf?
606
00:32:13,516 --> 00:32:17,729
No, honey, just a little old coyote.
607
00:32:21,149 --> 00:32:23,860
It's no secret that
throughout her whole life,
608
00:32:23,902 --> 00:32:28,490
Elizabeth Taylor had many
close friendships with gay men.
609
00:32:29,240 --> 00:32:32,410
Echoing her role in "Giant,"
Taylor often gravitated
610
00:32:32,452 --> 00:32:35,872
toward social outcasts or misfits.
611
00:32:35,914 --> 00:32:38,083
We became close friends.
612
00:32:38,124 --> 00:32:39,584
We are close friends today,
613
00:32:39,626 --> 00:32:42,045
and I think she is
one of the best people.
614
00:32:42,712 --> 00:32:45,382
That kind of loving bond between them,
615
00:32:45,423 --> 00:32:47,217
the soulmate connection, if you will,
616
00:32:47,258 --> 00:32:50,595
becomes all the more important
later in life.
617
00:32:51,554 --> 00:32:55,558
George Stevens had complicated characters
618
00:32:55,600 --> 00:33:00,146
and he cared about those
characters within society
619
00:33:00,230 --> 00:33:02,982
in a way that's different
from how Sirk did.
620
00:33:03,900 --> 00:33:05,694
Now look here, Sarge.
621
00:33:05,777 --> 00:33:09,239
I'd sure appreciate it if you were
a little more polite to these people.
622
00:33:09,280 --> 00:33:11,199
Oh, you would, would you?
623
00:33:11,282 --> 00:33:12,951
By the end of that movie,
624
00:33:13,034 --> 00:33:15,036
Rock Hudson is our American hero
625
00:33:15,120 --> 00:33:19,290
because he's inclusive
and he's a feminist,
626
00:33:19,332 --> 00:33:22,127
and then he's got grandkids
that are mixed.
627
00:33:22,210 --> 00:33:24,879
Those kids in their infinite wisdom
628
00:33:24,963 --> 00:33:26,297
are smarter than we are.
629
00:33:26,381 --> 00:33:28,174
That's America, you know, to me.
630
00:33:28,258 --> 00:33:30,218
So he is America.
631
00:33:31,344 --> 00:33:33,805
Sure, even the calf's got my number.
632
00:33:35,724 --> 00:33:38,435
In Hollywood, a new high
for glamor is reached
633
00:33:38,476 --> 00:33:42,564
as Warner Bros. premieres
George Stevens' production, "Giant."
634
00:33:42,647 --> 00:33:44,649
Rock Hudson and his charming wife Phyllis
635
00:33:44,733 --> 00:33:47,777
expressed their happiness
about the brilliant premiere.
636
00:33:47,819 --> 00:33:49,362
- Hey, Sugar!
- Yes?
637
00:33:49,446 --> 00:33:51,636
Here is a guy that's
as big as Texas in "Giant."
638
00:33:51,656 --> 00:33:53,950
- It's such a performance.
- Rock Hudson.
639
00:33:53,992 --> 00:33:55,807
Hello. How are you?
Nice to see you again.
640
00:33:55,827 --> 00:33:58,496
- Nice to see you again.
- I wanna meet your wife. Hello.
641
00:33:58,538 --> 00:34:02,083
So nice to meet you, Phyllis.
You wanna step in here?
642
00:34:02,167 --> 00:34:03,960
I never heard such screams in my life
643
00:34:04,002 --> 00:34:05,837
as when you got outta the car tonight.
644
00:34:05,879 --> 00:34:07,422
Well, you received
645
00:34:07,505 --> 00:34:09,446
an Academy Award nomination for the film.
646
00:34:09,466 --> 00:34:11,009
Mm-hmm, so did Jimmy.
647
00:34:11,051 --> 00:34:12,969
Is that right? I'd forgotten.
648
00:34:13,011 --> 00:34:15,554
The nominees for best actor are:
649
00:34:15,638 --> 00:34:18,141
Yul Brynner in "The King and I,"
650
00:34:18,183 --> 00:34:20,310
Rock Hudson in "Giant,"
651
00:34:20,351 --> 00:34:22,437
James Dean in "Giant,"
652
00:34:22,520 --> 00:34:24,688
Kirk Douglas in "Lust for life,"
653
00:34:24,731 --> 00:34:28,735
and Sir Laurence Olivier
in "Richard III."
654
00:34:28,818 --> 00:34:32,697
The winner is Yul Brynner.
655
00:34:34,866 --> 00:34:40,871
Boy, it is really sad to me that he lost
656
00:34:40,914 --> 00:34:45,043
because it's such
a tour de force performance.
657
00:34:45,627 --> 00:34:49,672
When do you get that chance again?
658
00:34:49,714 --> 00:34:51,549
He did not.
659
00:34:55,553 --> 00:34:58,056
I wanted to be a Western movie actor.
660
00:34:58,139 --> 00:35:03,311
So I landed in Hollywood in 1961
661
00:35:03,395 --> 00:35:07,023
and realized that I was kind of pretty,
662
00:35:07,065 --> 00:35:09,359
but, uh, what I didn't realize was
663
00:35:09,401 --> 00:35:11,236
I didn't have any talent.
664
00:35:11,277 --> 00:35:15,365
Fortunately, when I
finally got with Rock,
665
00:35:15,407 --> 00:35:17,555
I realized I really
didn't want to be an actor.
666
00:35:17,575 --> 00:35:19,911
I didn't want any part of that business.
667
00:35:27,419 --> 00:35:30,213
Uh, yes.
I remember very well.
668
00:35:31,631 --> 00:35:35,093
I got a job at Universal Studios,
669
00:35:35,176 --> 00:35:37,721
and I wanted to see what he looked like.
670
00:35:37,762 --> 00:35:41,391
So I went over beside his cottage,
671
00:35:41,433 --> 00:35:45,437
and he walked out
and walked down the street,
672
00:35:45,478 --> 00:35:48,023
and he turned and looked back.
673
00:35:48,106 --> 00:35:50,525
And, of course, I was...
whew!
674
00:35:51,818 --> 00:35:53,611
He was incredible.
675
00:35:53,695 --> 00:35:58,158
He made a big splash,
let's put it that way.
676
00:35:58,783 --> 00:36:03,788
And I got a phone call
from someone on his staff.
677
00:36:03,830 --> 00:36:07,834
Did I want to come up
and visit with Rock Hudson?
678
00:36:07,917 --> 00:36:09,544
And...
679
00:36:10,378 --> 00:36:13,256
I wasn't gonna say no.
680
00:36:19,429 --> 00:36:21,765
What is there to talk
about, my dear husband?
681
00:36:21,806 --> 00:36:23,663
Judith, please.
You're in no condition...
682
00:36:23,683 --> 00:36:26,603
Divorce. That's what you
wanna talk about, isn't it?
683
00:36:26,644 --> 00:36:28,646
Well, let me tell you right now,
684
00:36:28,688 --> 00:36:31,983
my gallant, silent suffering
spouse, you'll never get one!
685
00:36:32,025 --> 00:36:35,111
Our marriage was a mistake.
Yours as well as mine.
686
00:36:35,153 --> 00:36:38,803
Was it? You didn't think so when you
thought I could make a gentleman out of you.
687
00:36:38,823 --> 00:36:42,786
Well, you married me and
you're going to stay married to me.
688
00:36:42,827 --> 00:36:45,997
So sneak around back alleys
if that's the kind of man you are.
689
00:36:46,039 --> 00:36:47,832
I doubt that I could stop you.
690
00:36:50,585 --> 00:36:52,462
When he was on location
691
00:36:52,504 --> 00:36:56,174
for the epic remake of
"A Farewell to Arms,"
692
00:36:56,257 --> 00:36:59,511
Rock's marriage
to Phyllis began to fall apart.
693
00:37:02,681 --> 00:37:04,474
You're going down to town tomorrow
694
00:37:04,516 --> 00:37:06,559
and find yourself
some gay young playmate.
695
00:37:06,643 --> 00:37:09,688
- I don't wanna be with anybody else, I tell you.
- Yes, you do.
696
00:37:10,355 --> 00:37:12,357
Three years after she exchanged
697
00:37:12,440 --> 00:37:14,192
marriage vows with Rock,
698
00:37:14,275 --> 00:37:16,528
Phyllis files for divorce.
699
00:37:16,569 --> 00:37:18,655
Phyllis complained
that he was always away.
700
00:37:18,697 --> 00:37:20,929
Well, hello. You're married
to a major movie star
701
00:37:20,949 --> 00:37:24,119
who's shooting films in exotic locations.
702
00:37:24,202 --> 00:37:27,539
She really took him to the
cleaners when she divorced him.
703
00:37:27,622 --> 00:37:29,374
He lost practically everything.
704
00:37:29,416 --> 00:37:32,544
He had a sailboat
that was his pride and joy,
705
00:37:32,585 --> 00:37:34,879
and he had to sell that to pay her off.
706
00:37:34,921 --> 00:37:37,632
And, uh, he was really angry about that.
707
00:37:37,716 --> 00:37:41,386
In a memoir published
two years after Rock's death,
708
00:37:41,469 --> 00:37:43,221
Phyllis claimed that
709
00:37:43,304 --> 00:37:45,223
she was entirely duped,
710
00:37:45,306 --> 00:37:47,350
manipulated into participating
711
00:37:47,392 --> 00:37:49,436
in this sham marriage with Rock.
712
00:37:49,519 --> 00:37:53,481
And she claims she had
no idea that Hudson is gay,
713
00:37:53,565 --> 00:37:56,067
which is really hard to swallow,
714
00:37:56,109 --> 00:38:00,071
given the fact that virtually
every bit player, makeup man,
715
00:38:00,113 --> 00:38:02,198
assistant gofer at Universal,
716
00:38:02,240 --> 00:38:05,368
knew the score about Rock Hudson.
717
00:38:05,410 --> 00:38:07,704
How did she possibly miss the memo?
718
00:38:07,746 --> 00:38:10,915
It's just kind of inconceivable.
719
00:38:22,218 --> 00:38:23,595
Colonel Farr.
720
00:38:23,636 --> 00:38:25,513
I thought we could get together,
721
00:38:25,597 --> 00:38:27,515
have a cup of coffee, maybe,
722
00:38:27,599 --> 00:38:29,184
uh, get acquainted.
723
00:38:29,267 --> 00:38:31,978
We might find we have a lot in common.
724
00:38:32,062 --> 00:38:33,438
I'm on my way.
725
00:38:37,525 --> 00:38:40,028
♪ Pillow talk ♪
726
00:38:40,111 --> 00:38:41,821
♪ Pillow talk ♪
727
00:38:41,905 --> 00:38:44,199
♪ Another night
I hear myself ♪
728
00:38:44,282 --> 00:38:45,533
♪ Talk, talk, talk, talk ♪
729
00:38:45,617 --> 00:38:47,702
Look, I don't know what's bothering you,
730
00:38:47,786 --> 00:38:50,121
but don't take your
bedroom problems out on me.
731
00:38:50,163 --> 00:38:51,664
I have no bedroom problems.
732
00:38:51,748 --> 00:38:54,125
There's nothing in my
bedroom that bothers me.
733
00:38:54,167 --> 00:38:56,252
Oh, that's too bad.
734
00:38:56,294 --> 00:38:57,879
"Pillow Talk" seems very tame now
735
00:38:57,962 --> 00:39:02,467
by comparison with, um,
today's more explicit standards.
736
00:39:02,509 --> 00:39:05,887
We almost didn't do it
because it was too dirty.
737
00:39:09,182 --> 00:39:12,477
So that's the other end
of your party line.
738
00:39:12,936 --> 00:39:15,814
It was fun and, and, and it was fluff,
739
00:39:15,897 --> 00:39:19,275
and it was wonderful
to look at, and you laughed.
740
00:39:19,317 --> 00:39:21,444
I'm so sick of seeing the ugliness.
741
00:39:21,486 --> 00:39:22,862
We all know it's there.
742
00:39:22,946 --> 00:39:24,469
I don't hide my head in the sand
743
00:39:24,489 --> 00:39:25,949
and say that it's not there.
744
00:39:25,990 --> 00:39:29,452
But I believe that motion
pictures are an escape.
745
00:39:32,414 --> 00:39:35,000
What a marvelous-looking man.
746
00:39:35,083 --> 00:39:37,794
I wonder if he's single.
747
00:39:39,421 --> 00:39:43,174
I don't know how long I can
get away with this act.
748
00:39:45,969 --> 00:39:48,471
You know, the deception
749
00:39:48,513 --> 00:39:51,474
is an interesting artifact of the times.
750
00:39:51,516 --> 00:39:55,854
You have a gay actor
playing a straight man
751
00:39:55,895 --> 00:39:58,481
impersonating a possibly gay man.
752
00:39:58,523 --> 00:39:59,649
It's a house of mirrors.
753
00:39:59,691 --> 00:40:01,860
Tell me about your job.
754
00:40:01,901 --> 00:40:04,362
Must be very exciting working with
755
00:40:04,404 --> 00:40:07,365
all them colors and fabrics and all.
756
00:40:09,617 --> 00:40:11,619
In those Doris Day movies,
757
00:40:11,703 --> 00:40:13,705
he's always pretending to be gay
758
00:40:13,788 --> 00:40:16,207
in order to get Doris into bed.
759
00:40:16,249 --> 00:40:18,460
That's the joke always.
760
00:40:18,543 --> 00:40:20,920
Why can't you get married?
761
00:40:21,755 --> 00:40:23,214
That's the sort of thing a man
762
00:40:23,256 --> 00:40:25,467
doesn't discuss with a nice woman.
763
00:40:25,550 --> 00:40:27,093
That was almost a device
764
00:40:27,177 --> 00:40:29,284
to keep anybody from asking
questions about him.
765
00:40:29,304 --> 00:40:31,514
Ye gods, you've got cold feet!
766
00:40:31,556 --> 00:40:33,767
Complaints, complaints,
nothing but complaints!
767
00:40:33,850 --> 00:40:36,019
It was kind of an evil gag, actually.
768
00:40:36,061 --> 00:40:39,814
And I hold Ross Hunter
largely responsible for that,
769
00:40:39,898 --> 00:40:41,399
the producer of those films.
770
00:40:41,483 --> 00:40:44,069
I know for a fact
that Ross Hunter was gay.
771
00:40:46,696 --> 00:40:48,323
Linus!
772
00:40:48,406 --> 00:40:50,575
What are you doing here?
773
00:40:51,076 --> 00:40:53,578
Where am I?
774
00:40:54,662 --> 00:40:57,707
Why, this is Jerry Webster's apartment!
775
00:40:57,749 --> 00:41:00,251
Nothing was ever talked about
776
00:41:00,335 --> 00:41:02,087
as far as his private life.
777
00:41:03,588 --> 00:41:06,466
Many, many people would ask me,
778
00:41:06,549 --> 00:41:08,927
you know,
"Is Rock Hudson really gay?"
779
00:41:08,968 --> 00:41:13,556
And I said, "It's something
that I will not discuss."
780
00:41:13,598 --> 00:41:17,811
I mean, first of all, I know
nothing about his private life.
781
00:41:17,894 --> 00:41:20,021
And if I did, I wouldn't discuss it.
782
00:41:20,105 --> 00:41:21,231
Look at me.
783
00:41:21,272 --> 00:41:24,984
I can't.
I'm too ashamed.
784
00:41:25,068 --> 00:41:26,653
Forget me, Carol.
785
00:41:26,736 --> 00:41:30,699
You deserve a man, not
a mass of neurotic doubts.
786
00:41:31,324 --> 00:41:35,328
So I can't tell you one thing about
him except that he is a nice man.
787
00:41:35,787 --> 00:41:37,580
You're tearing yourself apart!
788
00:41:37,622 --> 00:41:39,040
Mr. Allen.
789
00:41:39,124 --> 00:41:42,127
Let's try to be adult
about this and work out
790
00:41:42,168 --> 00:41:43,883
some sort of schedule where I can...
791
00:41:43,962 --> 00:41:46,172
It's funny when I see him
792
00:41:46,256 --> 00:41:47,507
smoking in that movie,
793
00:41:47,590 --> 00:41:49,801
it was so him, because he chain smoked.
794
00:41:49,843 --> 00:41:52,470
It's like he's not even acting.
795
00:41:55,807 --> 00:41:57,475
Mark and George were
796
00:41:57,559 --> 00:41:59,310
really good friends with me
797
00:41:59,394 --> 00:42:01,104
and my partner, Al Roberts,
798
00:42:01,146 --> 00:42:02,605
and that's how I met Rock.
799
00:42:02,647 --> 00:42:05,191
And we, we just really
800
00:42:05,275 --> 00:42:06,735
hit it off because
801
00:42:06,818 --> 00:42:09,195
I didn't treat him like a movie star.
802
00:42:09,279 --> 00:42:11,906
I... We were just cool friends.
803
00:42:12,824 --> 00:42:15,660
Our social life with him
was very private.
804
00:42:15,744 --> 00:42:18,663
I mean, we didn't go out to restaurants.
805
00:42:18,705 --> 00:42:20,832
We would go to Rock's house.
806
00:42:20,915 --> 00:42:23,418
It was called "The Castle."
807
00:42:23,501 --> 00:42:24,753
It was breathtaking.
808
00:42:24,836 --> 00:42:27,297
It looked like a hacienda.
809
00:42:27,339 --> 00:42:31,634
You just felt so welcome
when you came to that home.
810
00:42:31,676 --> 00:42:34,721
The house was very casual.
811
00:42:34,804 --> 00:42:38,308
It wasn't stiff.
And that's how he was.
812
00:42:38,350 --> 00:42:40,352
He was very, very casual.
813
00:42:40,435 --> 00:42:44,356
And then, of course, when he'd come
to Laguna, it was really, really fun too.
814
00:42:45,106 --> 00:42:48,526
I think he could breathe
a lot easier in Laguna.
815
00:42:48,610 --> 00:42:53,365
And because Mark and George had
a home here, he did come down a lot.
816
00:42:54,157 --> 00:42:58,078
The gay beach was to the
left of the lifeguard tower.
817
00:42:58,161 --> 00:43:02,791
And it was magical because you
could play volleyball on the beach
818
00:43:02,874 --> 00:43:04,417
and just without a shirt on,
819
00:43:04,501 --> 00:43:06,169
just step up into the bar
820
00:43:06,211 --> 00:43:08,213
on a hot summer Sunday
821
00:43:08,254 --> 00:43:09,714
and have a beer,
822
00:43:09,756 --> 00:43:12,717
and it was very erotic.
823
00:43:12,801 --> 00:43:15,512
Yeah, I mean, like big time.
824
00:43:15,553 --> 00:43:16,753
Yeah.
825
00:43:20,183 --> 00:43:21,685
Do you love me, Mitch?
826
00:43:21,726 --> 00:43:23,269
Like a brother.
827
00:43:25,563 --> 00:43:27,440
I don't want you as a brother.
828
00:43:27,524 --> 00:43:29,901
Can't be any other way, Marylee.
829
00:43:32,404 --> 00:43:34,948
Don't... please don't...
830
00:43:35,031 --> 00:43:38,410
waste your life away waiting for me.
831
00:43:42,872 --> 00:43:45,125
You have the movie magazines
832
00:43:45,208 --> 00:43:46,751
propping up this fantasy
833
00:43:46,793 --> 00:43:49,963
that everyone is straight and
looking for love and marriage,
834
00:43:50,046 --> 00:43:53,717
while the tabloids are
obsessed with homosexuals
835
00:43:53,758 --> 00:43:57,303
and trying to dig up
as much dirt as they can.
836
00:43:57,387 --> 00:44:00,640
This, of course, was during
the era of J. Edgar Hoover.
837
00:44:00,724 --> 00:44:04,602
So there's an obsessive
interest in anything homosexual.
838
00:44:04,644 --> 00:44:06,604
Policy of the department is
839
00:44:06,688 --> 00:44:09,149
that we do not employ
homosexuals knowingly.
840
00:44:09,232 --> 00:44:12,736
And that if we discover homosexuals
in our department, we discharge them.
841
00:44:13,903 --> 00:44:17,490
Given all that was going on
in Rock Hudson's private life,
842
00:44:17,574 --> 00:44:22,370
it's not surprising that the
FBI was keeping a close watch.
843
00:44:22,454 --> 00:44:25,623
The lieutenant wants
to ask you some questions.
844
00:44:26,458 --> 00:44:29,085
Like where you've been
spending your evenings lately,
845
00:44:29,127 --> 00:44:31,318
staying out till three
and four in the morning.
846
00:44:33,631 --> 00:44:35,133
There was this catchphrase
847
00:44:35,216 --> 00:44:36,843
about "Confidential" magazine:
848
00:44:36,926 --> 00:44:40,722
"They trade in nymphos,
pinkos, winos and homos."
849
00:44:40,805 --> 00:44:42,599
And it's got a subscription base
850
00:44:42,640 --> 00:44:44,351
of three million at that point.
851
00:44:44,434 --> 00:44:46,227
It's got a huge readership.
852
00:44:46,311 --> 00:44:50,732
"Confidential" started
to move in on Rock Hudson
853
00:44:50,815 --> 00:44:53,818
and Henry Willson certainly
did not wanna lose
854
00:44:53,860 --> 00:44:55,111
this golden goose.
855
00:44:55,153 --> 00:44:57,238
They say that there was this tradeoff
856
00:44:57,322 --> 00:44:59,032
where Tab Hunter, who was indeed
857
00:44:59,115 --> 00:45:01,493
a Henry Willson client, was offered up
858
00:45:01,534 --> 00:45:02,869
sacrificially
859
00:45:02,952 --> 00:45:04,829
to save Rock Hudson.
860
00:45:04,913 --> 00:45:07,123
"Confidential" printed a story
861
00:45:07,165 --> 00:45:08,833
about Tab Hunter being arrested
862
00:45:08,875 --> 00:45:12,128
at what was called
an "all-male pajama party."
863
00:45:12,170 --> 00:45:14,214
That kind of salacious exposé
864
00:45:14,297 --> 00:45:17,092
could wipe out an entire career.
865
00:45:17,884 --> 00:45:19,678
We being followed?
866
00:45:19,719 --> 00:45:20,970
Probably not,
867
00:45:21,012 --> 00:45:23,348
but the general always
goes on that assumption.
868
00:45:24,057 --> 00:45:27,102
It really is a miracle that Rock Hudson
869
00:45:27,185 --> 00:45:30,480
never got caught by the tabloids.
870
00:45:33,566 --> 00:45:35,610
Well, you know, I never met Rock.
871
00:45:35,694 --> 00:45:37,987
Uh, he died in October of '85,
872
00:45:38,029 --> 00:45:41,241
and I came into Lee's life in May of '86.
873
00:45:41,324 --> 00:45:45,120
Rock took that photo in the early '70s.
874
00:45:45,203 --> 00:45:47,956
That's completely in a different era.
875
00:45:48,039 --> 00:45:51,876
We enjoyed traveling together.
876
00:45:55,463 --> 00:45:59,426
He drove the management
at Universal crazy
877
00:45:59,509 --> 00:46:02,429
by taking off, he and I,
878
00:46:02,512 --> 00:46:05,557
without telling them where he was going.
879
00:46:05,640 --> 00:46:08,184
And they really got upset,
880
00:46:08,226 --> 00:46:11,855
and he just said, "Screw it, I'm
gonna do what I'm gonna do."
881
00:46:20,780 --> 00:46:24,075
We spent some time in New Orleans
882
00:46:24,159 --> 00:46:27,037
and the Ford Motor Company lent him
883
00:46:27,078 --> 00:46:29,956
a brand-new convertible.
884
00:46:30,040 --> 00:46:32,417
And we had a blast in that car.
885
00:46:37,630 --> 00:46:40,008
We were in Pat O'Brien's
886
00:46:40,091 --> 00:46:43,303
where they have a special
drink, the Hurricane,
887
00:46:43,386 --> 00:46:48,099
and somebody came by
and snapped a picture of us.
888
00:46:49,601 --> 00:46:52,771
Then they offered the picture
for sale, of course,
889
00:46:52,812 --> 00:46:59,819
and we got it because this was
the only picture of both of us together.
890
00:46:59,903 --> 00:47:02,322
We were ordered by Henry Willson,
891
00:47:02,405 --> 00:47:04,783
that evil agent of his,
892
00:47:04,824 --> 00:47:07,952
never to have our picture taken together
893
00:47:08,036 --> 00:47:10,622
because somebody would see it
894
00:47:10,663 --> 00:47:14,334
and know that we were gay.
895
00:47:24,135 --> 00:47:26,471
Yes, that was a lot of sneaking around.
896
00:47:26,513 --> 00:47:28,306
We'd drive up to a motel.
897
00:47:28,348 --> 00:47:31,017
I would go in and ask
if there was any rooms.
898
00:47:31,101 --> 00:47:34,229
Did you get, let's say, two single beds
899
00:47:34,312 --> 00:47:37,649
or one... queen-size bed,
pardon the pun?
900
00:47:37,691 --> 00:47:39,234
Or...
901
00:47:39,317 --> 00:47:40,944
Don't remember.
902
00:47:40,985 --> 00:47:42,737
Uh, but, uh...
903
00:47:42,821 --> 00:47:46,074
it ended up by being one bed.
904
00:47:59,170 --> 00:48:03,216
There should have been, but there wasn't.
905
00:48:03,299 --> 00:48:07,137
There was a part of him
that was very straitlaced
906
00:48:07,178 --> 00:48:11,182
and understanding
of the previous generation.
907
00:48:11,266 --> 00:48:13,852
He never mentioned,
"Gee, wouldn't it be nice
908
00:48:13,935 --> 00:48:16,980
if we could just
hold hands in public?"
909
00:48:17,022 --> 00:48:21,776
He was so inured of, uh...
910
00:48:21,860 --> 00:48:23,987
being closeted
911
00:48:24,029 --> 00:48:26,698
that he never mentioned it.
912
00:48:29,576 --> 00:48:31,870
Forget for a moment that I'm your doctor
913
00:48:31,911 --> 00:48:34,789
and, uh, let me give you
some advice as a friend.
914
00:48:34,873 --> 00:48:36,666
Marry him.
915
00:48:37,208 --> 00:48:40,545
So, what good was your noble sacrifice?
916
00:48:40,587 --> 00:48:43,381
If you'd loved him,
you'd have gone to him.
917
00:48:43,465 --> 00:48:46,676
Let's face it, you were
ready for a love affair,
918
00:48:46,718 --> 00:48:48,553
but not for love.
919
00:49:01,900 --> 00:49:04,861
Oh, my darling!
Oh, my darling.
920
00:49:04,903 --> 00:49:06,488
Are you having another nightmare?
921
00:49:06,571 --> 00:49:07,822
Uh, no, I, I...
922
00:49:07,906 --> 00:49:09,449
I'm sort of, I don't know.
923
00:49:09,532 --> 00:49:12,243
We have to talk about
that thing called image, uh,
924
00:49:12,285 --> 00:49:14,204
whatever that is, uh...
925
00:49:14,245 --> 00:49:15,830
and I sort of represent
926
00:49:15,914 --> 00:49:17,499
a comedy image
927
00:49:17,582 --> 00:49:20,085
in dinner jacket or something, you know?
928
00:49:20,126 --> 00:49:21,983
It might be a lot of fun
to do a horror story.
929
00:49:22,003 --> 00:49:23,505
I'd love to.
930
00:49:25,090 --> 00:49:27,133
Bold.
931
00:49:27,759 --> 00:49:30,053
Bizarre.
932
00:49:31,137 --> 00:49:33,473
Terrifying.
933
00:49:35,308 --> 00:49:38,603
Rock Hudson, in
an astonishing change of pace,
934
00:49:38,645 --> 00:49:41,564
stars in "Seconds."
935
00:49:42,315 --> 00:49:46,277
It's certainly, uh,
a different type of picture
936
00:49:46,319 --> 00:49:49,656
and certainly a different role for me.
937
00:49:49,739 --> 00:49:52,033
It's almost a horror movie,
938
00:49:52,117 --> 00:49:54,202
certainly a suspenseful movie,
939
00:49:54,285 --> 00:49:56,579
and certainly very dramatic.
940
00:49:56,621 --> 00:50:01,084
Rock Hudson as a man who
buys for himself a totally new life,
941
00:50:01,126 --> 00:50:03,336
a chance to begin again.
942
00:50:03,420 --> 00:50:07,090
Every man's dream since time began.
943
00:50:07,132 --> 00:50:09,467
Bandages are removed.
944
00:50:09,509 --> 00:50:12,095
I think you'll be more than pleased.
945
00:50:12,137 --> 00:50:17,017
In fact, I expect you to be
prancing around here like a stud bull.
946
00:50:18,476 --> 00:50:19,894
Good work.
947
00:50:19,978 --> 00:50:22,564
Well, I tend to think
that Rock Hudson understood
948
00:50:22,647 --> 00:50:27,152
that in some ways this film was
reflecting the whole Hollywood star trip
949
00:50:27,235 --> 00:50:29,320
and how he had been
completely transformed
950
00:50:29,404 --> 00:50:31,489
and marketed for the public.
951
00:50:31,573 --> 00:50:34,200
Uh, that couldn't have been lost on him.
952
00:50:34,284 --> 00:50:38,496
There's never a time
that I don't feel at home
953
00:50:38,580 --> 00:50:43,668
in a performance by Rock Hudson
except "Seconds."
954
00:50:43,710 --> 00:50:45,337
All right, son.
955
00:50:45,378 --> 00:50:47,505
He's so uncomfortable.
956
00:50:47,589 --> 00:50:52,344
There is a real shadow side
here that he's playing.
957
00:50:54,679 --> 00:50:56,681
The years I've spent
958
00:50:56,765 --> 00:50:58,683
trying to get all the things
959
00:50:58,725 --> 00:51:01,895
I was told were important,
960
00:51:01,978 --> 00:51:05,940
that I was supposed to want...
961
00:51:06,024 --> 00:51:09,027
and California was the same.
962
00:51:09,110 --> 00:51:10,403
They...
963
00:51:10,487 --> 00:51:12,697
made the same decisions for me
964
00:51:12,781 --> 00:51:13,981
all over again.
965
00:51:14,032 --> 00:51:16,826
And they were the same things, really.
966
00:51:18,161 --> 00:51:21,956
Hey, John, why are they
staring at me like that?
967
00:51:22,040 --> 00:51:23,500
They know.
968
00:51:23,541 --> 00:51:27,337
They know what?
969
00:51:27,379 --> 00:51:30,006
They're like you.
970
00:51:30,048 --> 00:51:32,717
Oh, Nora!
971
00:51:33,343 --> 00:51:35,804
Hudson's performance is astonishing.
972
00:51:35,887 --> 00:51:40,016
Is Rock Hudson kind of
decoding himself on screen?
973
00:51:40,058 --> 00:51:42,185
Yeah, it certainly looks like it.
974
00:51:42,227 --> 00:51:46,564
It's a weird thing to make your living
975
00:51:46,648 --> 00:51:48,400
creating characters.
976
00:51:48,441 --> 00:51:51,736
It's weird from my side of the camera
977
00:51:51,820 --> 00:51:54,823
and it must be even weirder
on the other side
978
00:51:54,906 --> 00:51:57,909
because I think there is
always a sense of like,
979
00:51:57,992 --> 00:51:59,911
"Who am I really?" You know?
980
00:52:01,705 --> 00:52:03,915
Somewhere in the man,
981
00:52:03,957 --> 00:52:07,460
there is still a key unturned.
982
00:52:08,044 --> 00:52:10,630
In order to become Rock Hudson,
983
00:52:10,714 --> 00:52:15,301
he really had to destroy Roy Fitzgerald,
984
00:52:15,385 --> 00:52:19,764
the gay boy with an inferiority
complex from Winnetka.
985
00:52:19,806 --> 00:52:23,768
But even if millions of fans
are believing the lie,
986
00:52:23,852 --> 00:52:28,606
Roy Fitzgerald still knows
the truth about Rock Hudson.
987
00:52:28,690 --> 00:52:32,610
Wait a minute, what's happening?
988
00:52:32,652 --> 00:52:36,448
When "Seconds" first
came out, it was trashed.
989
00:52:36,531 --> 00:52:39,993
Nobody wanted to see
Rock Hudson depressed.
990
00:52:40,076 --> 00:52:42,287
What's really sad to me
about Rock's career
991
00:52:42,328 --> 00:52:43,580
is that the audiences
992
00:52:43,621 --> 00:52:46,249
don't like it when
Rock Hudson steps out of,
993
00:52:46,291 --> 00:52:48,918
kind of, the way
that they prefer to see him.
994
00:52:48,960 --> 00:52:52,756
They don't want to see him do
anything radically different.
995
00:52:59,012 --> 00:53:00,638
Being an actor,
996
00:53:00,680 --> 00:53:03,975
there are so many
disappointments and frustrations,
997
00:53:04,059 --> 00:53:06,895
and you think, "Hell,
what am I doing all this for?
998
00:53:06,978 --> 00:53:09,336
I'm gonna hop the next freight
out of town," or whatever.
999
00:53:09,356 --> 00:53:12,150
You get blue and you get whatever.
1000
00:53:12,233 --> 00:53:14,194
And I think that because of that,
1001
00:53:14,277 --> 00:53:17,447
I think "this too shall pass"
works for me.
1002
00:53:18,073 --> 00:53:21,618
"This too shall pass"
is a great consolation,
1003
00:53:21,659 --> 00:53:25,997
I mean, in terms of what, crises
or adverse reviews or anything?
1004
00:53:26,081 --> 00:53:29,459
Yes, anything negative.
Any, you know...
1005
00:53:33,171 --> 00:53:35,507
I was born in Iowa,
1006
00:53:35,548 --> 00:53:38,677
and then I came to
Los Angeles and never left.
1007
00:53:38,718 --> 00:53:39,969
Why?
1008
00:53:40,011 --> 00:53:42,555
Well, I went to my first gay bar.
1009
00:53:42,639 --> 00:53:46,393
It was in, uh, Long Beach at a drag bar.
1010
00:53:46,476 --> 00:53:49,145
I didn't particularly like
the drag queens,
1011
00:53:49,187 --> 00:53:53,900
but I sure liked the fact that
there was somebody in this world
1012
00:53:53,983 --> 00:53:55,360
that was gay besides me.
1013
00:53:57,445 --> 00:54:00,198
How did you meet Rock Hudson?
1014
00:54:00,281 --> 00:54:01,908
I don't know what year it was,
1015
00:54:01,991 --> 00:54:06,204
but one of my best friends
brought him over for dinner.
1016
00:54:06,246 --> 00:54:09,582
We played bridge all the time.
1017
00:54:09,666 --> 00:54:12,711
We, uh, did a lot of things together.
1018
00:54:12,794 --> 00:54:16,798
I took trips with him and we went skiing.
1019
00:54:16,881 --> 00:54:21,219
I watched "Giant" more times
than I care to remember.
1020
00:54:22,637 --> 00:54:26,349
Those were good times
that can't be repeated.
1021
00:54:26,391 --> 00:54:29,561
I felt closer to him than anybody else.
1022
00:54:29,644 --> 00:54:31,563
If you say,
"Who's your closest friend?"
1023
00:54:31,646 --> 00:54:34,941
I mean, his name would
come out first, I think.
1024
00:54:35,567 --> 00:54:37,902
Tab Hunter was a good friend of mine,
1025
00:54:37,944 --> 00:54:39,487
but he wasn't very social.
1026
00:54:39,571 --> 00:54:41,573
He didn't like a crowd,
1027
00:54:41,614 --> 00:54:43,908
but it didn't bother Rock.
1028
00:54:44,576 --> 00:54:47,287
At that time, nobody lived openly.
1029
00:54:47,370 --> 00:54:49,205
He wanted to.
1030
00:54:49,247 --> 00:54:52,417
I ran a hospital laboratory, you know.
1031
00:54:52,459 --> 00:54:55,545
I can walk into any place
and nobody knows who I am,
1032
00:54:55,587 --> 00:54:58,423
but he couldn't do any of that.
1033
00:54:58,506 --> 00:55:00,800
Yeah.
That bothered him.
1034
00:55:04,929 --> 00:55:06,264
Well, he had boyfriends.
1035
00:55:06,348 --> 00:55:10,185
They were mostly young and pretty,
1036
00:55:10,268 --> 00:55:13,938
and showed huge baskets.
1037
00:55:14,773 --> 00:55:18,401
I don't recall him ever
having a very long relationship
1038
00:55:18,443 --> 00:55:20,779
with anybody,
1039
00:55:20,862 --> 00:55:22,989
other than friends.
1040
00:55:25,700 --> 00:55:28,119
- Yeah.
- Oh, okay.
1041
00:55:28,203 --> 00:55:32,290
Rock had a sizable dick,
1042
00:55:32,374 --> 00:55:35,126
but he tried to put that thing up my ass
1043
00:55:35,210 --> 00:55:37,212
and I couldn't do it.
1044
00:55:40,757 --> 00:55:42,906
For a while, you had
the whole field to yourself.
1045
00:55:42,926 --> 00:55:44,886
- For a while you were the...
- I did?
1046
00:55:44,969 --> 00:55:46,169
- Oh, yes.
- Did I?
1047
00:55:46,221 --> 00:55:48,014
Oh, yes, yes.
Am I right?
1048
00:55:48,098 --> 00:55:50,642
There was only, you know,
Rock Hudson, pant-pant...
1049
00:55:50,725 --> 00:55:52,811
And a lot of "ugs."
1050
00:55:52,894 --> 00:55:55,752
You know, the Pacinos and the
strangies were coming up, and then...
1051
00:55:55,772 --> 00:55:58,108
Well, you know what I'm saying.
1052
00:55:58,149 --> 00:56:01,633
You don't say my, you know, "I wanna
be on a desert island with Al Pacino,"
1053
00:56:01,653 --> 00:56:03,822
you know, we'll talk, but, um...
1054
00:56:03,863 --> 00:56:07,054
Does it ever upset you when you're
in something like the "Enquirer"?
1055
00:56:07,075 --> 00:56:08,493
Uh, no.
I don't read it, so...
1056
00:56:08,535 --> 00:56:10,392
I read it all the time.
You're always in it.
1057
00:56:10,412 --> 00:56:12,247
- Am I?
- Yeah.
1058
00:56:12,330 --> 00:56:14,020
First, I had asked him whether the press
1059
00:56:14,040 --> 00:56:17,085
had ever really hurt him,
and it was interesting.
1060
00:56:17,168 --> 00:56:19,818
He said, "Yes, it was a terrible
review I received in London."
1061
00:56:19,838 --> 00:56:22,257
I said, "You mean
that was the worst thing
1062
00:56:22,340 --> 00:56:24,843
that the press has
ever done to you, Rock?"
1063
00:56:24,926 --> 00:56:26,845
And he said, "Yes," and I remember
1064
00:56:26,928 --> 00:56:30,473
it was very difficult for me
to face, look into his eyes.
1065
00:56:30,515 --> 00:56:34,602
And I said, "Could you explain to us
1066
00:56:34,686 --> 00:56:38,690
what happened between you
and Mr. Jim Nabors?"
1067
00:56:39,524 --> 00:56:42,235
In 1971,
1068
00:56:42,318 --> 00:56:43,820
a couple of gay guys said,
1069
00:56:43,862 --> 00:56:48,366
"Wouldn't it be fun if
we sent out these invitations
1070
00:56:48,450 --> 00:56:50,535
"to a fabricated wedding
1071
00:56:50,577 --> 00:56:54,789
between Rock and 'Gomer
Pyle' star Jim Nabors?"
1072
00:56:54,873 --> 00:56:59,002
And the tipoff that this is like
an over-the-top gay Fantasia
1073
00:56:59,044 --> 00:57:02,547
is that Truman Capote
would be officiating
1074
00:57:02,630 --> 00:57:04,674
and Liberace would be providing
1075
00:57:04,716 --> 00:57:06,760
the musical accompaniment.
1076
00:57:06,843 --> 00:57:09,929
And the story starts
to spread like wildfire.
1077
00:57:10,013 --> 00:57:12,807
The story lands on the front page
1078
00:57:12,891 --> 00:57:14,893
of the "National Examiner."
1079
00:57:14,976 --> 00:57:16,624
Now I've read some pretty
weird things about you
1080
00:57:16,644 --> 00:57:18,563
in the fan magazines.
1081
00:57:18,646 --> 00:57:21,441
Uh, have you ever filed
a libel suit for anything
1082
00:57:21,524 --> 00:57:24,861
that's ever been written or said
about you? Have you wanted to?
1083
00:57:25,945 --> 00:57:28,073
And why didn't you?
I've always wondered.
1084
00:57:28,114 --> 00:57:30,825
Because it calls attention
to it and only makes it worse.
1085
00:57:30,909 --> 00:57:34,496
Aside from the McCarthy era
nonsense that went on in the '50s,
1086
00:57:34,579 --> 00:57:37,457
I think that this was
one of the worst stories
1087
00:57:37,540 --> 00:57:39,793
that ever emanated from a community.
1088
00:57:39,876 --> 00:57:42,921
He has never done a bad thing to anyone.
1089
00:57:42,962 --> 00:57:45,590
It would be terrific to say the guy is
1090
00:57:45,674 --> 00:57:47,926
"you know what," but he is not.
1091
00:57:48,760 --> 00:57:51,846
What's funny is tabloids
aren't leaking a story
1092
00:57:51,930 --> 00:57:55,100
about one of Rock's
real gay relationships.
1093
00:57:55,141 --> 00:57:58,561
They're leaking it
about a completely fabricated
1094
00:57:58,603 --> 00:58:01,398
and fantasized one.
1095
00:58:01,439 --> 00:58:04,526
March 1st, 1974.
1096
00:58:04,609 --> 00:58:06,945
- Rock, how are you?
- I'm fine.
1097
00:58:06,986 --> 00:58:08,927
Haven't talked to you
in a very long time.
1098
00:58:08,947 --> 00:58:10,615
I know it. I know it.
1099
00:58:10,657 --> 00:58:12,659
- And you've been busy.
- Yeah.
1100
00:58:12,742 --> 00:58:16,329
My friend would like very much
to meet you one of these days
1101
00:58:16,413 --> 00:58:17,699
if you have some free time.
1102
00:58:17,747 --> 00:58:19,207
Tell me about him.
1103
00:58:19,290 --> 00:58:21,876
He works at Paramount and he's, uh...
1104
00:58:21,960 --> 00:58:25,088
- oh, 6'2", I guess, something like that.
- Yeah.
1105
00:58:25,171 --> 00:58:28,258
And he works out, just an
all-round good boy, you know?
1106
00:58:28,299 --> 00:58:31,928
- Uh-huh.
- So I just thought I'd drop you the note
1107
00:58:31,970 --> 00:58:34,973
and see if you did want to
say hello to him, because, uh...
1108
00:58:35,056 --> 00:58:39,144
- Yeah. Well...
- He's just a damn fun boy, you know?
1109
00:58:39,185 --> 00:58:40,520
Mm-hmm.
1110
00:58:40,603 --> 00:58:42,605
Uh-huh.
1111
00:58:42,647 --> 00:58:44,983
How's the equipment?
1112
00:58:45,025 --> 00:58:47,485
Well, the equipment is about, oh,
1113
00:58:47,527 --> 00:58:49,195
about nine inches, I guess.
1114
00:58:49,279 --> 00:58:52,365
And he's, he's, uh, very good
1115
00:58:52,449 --> 00:58:55,493
- in that department too.
- Yeah.
1116
00:58:55,577 --> 00:58:58,663
- When's coming some free time for you?
- Well, most any day.
1117
00:58:58,747 --> 00:59:01,875
Well, my friend, I'll get on the
horn and give him your number.
1118
00:59:01,958 --> 00:59:03,960
Okey-doke.
And nice talking to you.
1119
00:59:04,002 --> 00:59:05,628
- All right, thank you.
- Bye-Bye.
1120
00:59:07,380 --> 00:59:09,924
Mr. Maupin, you are, um,
1121
00:59:10,008 --> 00:59:13,053
a well-known writer here
in this, uh, Bay Area.
1122
00:59:13,136 --> 00:59:16,681
You have written, um, regular
columns for the newspapers.
1123
00:59:16,765 --> 00:59:18,516
Your books have been published.
1124
00:59:18,600 --> 00:59:20,727
I guess you'd call yourself a gay writer.
1125
00:59:20,810 --> 00:59:22,771
I'm a writer who is gay.
1126
00:59:22,854 --> 00:59:25,190
My ability to write, for instance,
1127
00:59:25,231 --> 00:59:26,504
about a heterosexual romance
1128
00:59:26,524 --> 00:59:29,986
increased considerably after
I was willing to acknowledge
1129
00:59:30,028 --> 00:59:32,947
the nature of my romantic involvements.
1130
00:59:33,031 --> 00:59:35,367
I met Rock when he came to San Francisco.
1131
00:59:37,077 --> 00:59:39,458
He was up doing something
with "McMillan & Wife:...
1132
00:59:44,834 --> 00:59:46,753
...and he invited
a bunch of us
1133
00:59:46,836 --> 00:59:48,922
to come up to his suite at the hotel.
1134
00:59:49,005 --> 00:59:52,509
And at a certain point, he rose and said,
1135
00:59:52,550 --> 00:59:54,199
"I have a little reading
I want to do."
1136
00:59:54,219 --> 00:59:58,139
And he read the first chapter
of "Tales of the City"
1137
00:59:58,223 --> 01:00:00,725
to the assembled crowd.
1138
01:00:00,767 --> 01:00:03,978
It was Mary Ann, the newcomer in town,
1139
01:00:04,062 --> 01:00:06,872
telling her mother that she
was gonna live in San Francisco.
1140
01:00:06,898 --> 01:00:09,150
And her mother freaks out and says,
1141
01:00:09,234 --> 01:00:10,924
"Well, you can't, but I was just watching
1142
01:00:10,944 --> 01:00:12,404
"'McMillan & Wife' last night,
1143
01:00:12,445 --> 01:00:15,407
and the place is running over
with serial killers."
1144
01:00:16,241 --> 01:00:18,827
- You all right, Commissioner?
- Yeah, I'm fine.
1145
01:00:20,286 --> 01:00:21,413
Is this the gun he used?
1146
01:00:21,454 --> 01:00:23,039
That was so bizarre.
1147
01:00:23,081 --> 01:00:27,002
You can imagine, McMillan
himself was reading this to me.
1148
01:00:27,085 --> 01:00:29,379
You know, he could have been
a little less drunk
1149
01:00:29,421 --> 01:00:30,621
when he read the thing,
1150
01:00:30,672 --> 01:00:33,174
but, uh, he was somewhat slurred,
1151
01:00:33,258 --> 01:00:37,846
but it was Rock Hudson reading my work.
1152
01:00:37,929 --> 01:00:40,807
I think he sort of expected it
to charm the pants off of me.
1153
01:00:40,890 --> 01:00:43,685
And, uh, it more or less did.
1154
01:00:45,437 --> 01:00:48,940
We got up to the Fairmont
Hotel, the Diplomat Suite,
1155
01:00:49,024 --> 01:00:52,777
and Rock led me into the living room
1156
01:00:52,861 --> 01:00:55,196
and we're sort of
at each other right away.
1157
01:00:55,280 --> 01:01:00,076
And, uh, every movie I'd ever seen
him in was playing before my eyes.
1158
01:01:00,118 --> 01:01:04,748
You know, I really
was not up to the task.
1159
01:01:04,789 --> 01:01:06,750
I think that's the best way to put it.
1160
01:01:06,791 --> 01:01:09,627
In an effort to console me, he said,
1161
01:01:09,711 --> 01:01:12,380
"You know, I'm just
a normal guy like you."
1162
01:01:12,422 --> 01:01:14,966
And I said,
"And I'm Doris Day."
1163
01:01:15,050 --> 01:01:17,927
I saw him off and on after that
1164
01:01:17,969 --> 01:01:21,139
from times he would come
and visit in San Francisco,
1165
01:01:21,222 --> 01:01:23,975
or he'd invite me down to
"The Castle," as they called it.
1166
01:01:24,059 --> 01:01:26,353
And, uh, the friendship kind of grew
1167
01:01:26,436 --> 01:01:28,855
over that period of time.
1168
01:01:28,938 --> 01:01:31,816
But I never considered him
boyfriend material
1169
01:01:31,858 --> 01:01:33,693
or he me, for that matter.
1170
01:01:33,777 --> 01:01:35,445
We were playmates.
1171
01:01:35,487 --> 01:01:38,448
And that was fine with me,
just the way that worked.
1172
01:01:40,658 --> 01:01:42,420
I had a bee in my bonnet at the time.
1173
01:01:42,452 --> 01:01:44,829
I said, "You need
to come out of the closet,
1174
01:01:44,871 --> 01:01:46,603
and I'm the guy that can help
you with that.
1175
01:01:46,623 --> 01:01:50,752
I'll know how to do that,
not in a sensationalist way."
1176
01:01:50,835 --> 01:01:54,673
And Rock listened.
He was really listening to me.
1177
01:01:54,714 --> 01:01:57,842
Um, but...
1178
01:01:57,926 --> 01:02:00,470
Tom, his partner at the time,
1179
01:02:00,512 --> 01:02:03,431
said,
"Not until my mother dies."
1180
01:02:04,099 --> 01:02:07,560
Um... and I thought,
"What an odd thing to say."
1181
01:02:07,644 --> 01:02:09,354
If I was fucking Rock Hudson,
1182
01:02:09,437 --> 01:02:12,691
I would want my mother
to know immediately.
1183
01:02:12,732 --> 01:02:16,611
Oh, it's you!
I, I wasn't sure.
1184
01:02:16,695 --> 01:02:20,073
Hiding in closets
isn't going to cure you.
1185
01:02:22,283 --> 01:02:24,202
Mark and George and Rock,
1186
01:02:24,244 --> 01:02:27,664
and Tom I guess, they were
slightly ridiculous to me.
1187
01:02:27,706 --> 01:02:30,834
The pride they took in hiding.
1188
01:02:30,875 --> 01:02:35,088
I felt like I was a member of a new
generation that wanted to show them,
1189
01:02:35,171 --> 01:02:37,716
it doesn't have to be that way.
1190
01:02:39,426 --> 01:02:42,762
In the book, I depicted a guy
that was kind of fascinated
1191
01:02:42,846 --> 01:02:44,431
by the idea of gay liberation,
1192
01:02:44,514 --> 01:02:46,037
but couldn't quite do it himself.
1193
01:02:46,057 --> 01:02:48,727
I tried to capture his humanity,
1194
01:02:48,810 --> 01:02:51,521
his big, sweet, loving heart.
1195
01:02:51,563 --> 01:02:53,106
And I think I did.
1196
01:02:53,189 --> 01:02:55,296
I often did that, uh,
with "Tales of the City."
1197
01:02:55,316 --> 01:02:59,029
I sometimes put real people
into it with their permission.
1198
01:02:59,070 --> 01:03:01,656
I knew he wasn't
gonna give me my permission,
1199
01:03:01,740 --> 01:03:04,367
so I just did it and blanked out the name
1200
01:03:04,451 --> 01:03:06,244
in the Victorian tradition.
1201
01:03:06,578 --> 01:03:08,788
I'm so glad I did, actually,
1202
01:03:08,872 --> 01:03:12,292
because I established
that character in the books
1203
01:03:12,375 --> 01:03:17,088
before Rock died,
saying, this person exists,
1204
01:03:17,130 --> 01:03:19,257
but he can't show you who he is
1205
01:03:19,299 --> 01:03:22,093
because his life is shut off in this way.
1206
01:03:22,177 --> 01:03:26,264
Hey, Freddy, you're really
gonna love San Francisco.
1207
01:03:26,306 --> 01:03:27,557
Yeah?
1208
01:03:27,599 --> 01:03:30,518
I want you to know you can
change your mind at any time.
1209
01:03:30,602 --> 01:03:32,354
Ah, don't worry about me, baby.
1210
01:03:32,437 --> 01:03:35,190
I've been missing the ring.
I'm ready for a little action.
1211
01:03:35,273 --> 01:03:37,233
That about does it, Commissioner.
1212
01:03:37,275 --> 01:03:39,944
Yeah, sure does.
1213
01:03:39,986 --> 01:03:42,447
- Thanks.
- You're welcome, sir.
1214
01:03:42,489 --> 01:03:45,450
- See you in the shower.
- Okay, baby.
1215
01:03:55,210 --> 01:03:57,754
I probably wasn't wearing a bathing suit.
1216
01:03:59,255 --> 01:04:02,550
I was working a lot all through the '70s
1217
01:04:02,634 --> 01:04:04,719
in various gay rights issues.
1218
01:04:04,803 --> 01:04:06,846
And I was the point person
1219
01:04:06,930 --> 01:04:08,620
for international and national media
1220
01:04:08,640 --> 01:04:14,104
who came to San Francisco
to do stories about gay rights.
1221
01:04:15,146 --> 01:04:19,192
Fairly early on in having
met Rock, I suggested that,
1222
01:04:19,275 --> 01:04:23,988
"Maybe you'd like to go out
and to a sex club."
1223
01:04:24,030 --> 01:04:25,949
"Oh, well, of course."
1224
01:04:25,990 --> 01:04:27,325
There was no hesitation.
1225
01:04:27,367 --> 01:04:30,495
Like, "Are you sure?
No, I shouldn't..." No.
1226
01:04:30,537 --> 01:04:33,498
So there was this place
down on Sixth Street
1227
01:04:33,581 --> 01:04:34,916
called The Glory Holes.
1228
01:04:35,000 --> 01:04:37,752
And so we go in and we walk around
1229
01:04:37,794 --> 01:04:40,672
and sort of explain how it all works.
1230
01:04:40,714 --> 01:04:43,174
And there was a balcony
1231
01:04:43,258 --> 01:04:45,760
that you could go up above
1232
01:04:45,844 --> 01:04:49,014
and look out over the whole enterprise.
1233
01:04:49,097 --> 01:04:52,517
You can see all the traffic
around the aisleways.
1234
01:04:52,559 --> 01:04:57,689
And so we watched Rock
walk around and go in a booth
1235
01:04:57,772 --> 01:04:59,858
and you could hear this scream,
1236
01:04:59,941 --> 01:05:02,360
"Oh, my God,
it's Rock Hudson!"
1237
01:05:02,444 --> 01:05:04,946
And it went all throughout the place.
1238
01:05:04,988 --> 01:05:07,512
It obviously didn't bother him
because we didn't leave,
1239
01:05:07,532 --> 01:05:10,577
and we stayed, stayed quite a while.
1240
01:05:11,578 --> 01:05:16,958
I think he became so
comfortable with the dual life,
1241
01:05:17,042 --> 01:05:20,712
but I think that he found a way
to be comfortable with both lives.
1242
01:05:20,754 --> 01:05:23,882
- You've gotta tell them the truth.
- Do you know what'll happen?
1243
01:05:23,923 --> 01:05:25,842
I know it'll mean you'll lose your job
1244
01:05:25,884 --> 01:05:27,574
and your customers and everything, but...
1245
01:05:27,594 --> 01:05:28,970
you've got to do that.
1246
01:05:29,054 --> 01:05:30,869
Once you start fooling people,
you have to go on
1247
01:05:30,889 --> 01:05:33,266
and keep on fooling them and, and...
1248
01:05:33,350 --> 01:05:37,562
you're too nice a guy
to, to, to be a phony
1249
01:05:37,604 --> 01:05:39,898
and keep on being a phony.
1250
01:05:42,650 --> 01:05:45,258
You know, Hollywood at night
can be a fascinating place,
1251
01:05:45,278 --> 01:05:48,448
but Hollywood in the daytime
can be a lot of fun too.
1252
01:05:48,531 --> 01:05:51,368
Come on, follow me
and I'll show you what I mean.
1253
01:05:52,327 --> 01:05:54,537
Rock had a contact.
1254
01:05:54,579 --> 01:05:56,790
Somebody in West Hollywood
that could round up
1255
01:05:56,873 --> 01:05:59,751
gorgeous men at a moment's notice.
1256
01:05:59,834 --> 01:06:02,837
I knew a lot of folks in the community.
1257
01:06:02,921 --> 01:06:04,130
I had a lot of friends.
1258
01:06:04,214 --> 01:06:05,737
And so I would just call up, you know,
1259
01:06:05,757 --> 01:06:08,343
whoever I'd get my hands on
that was available
1260
01:06:08,426 --> 01:06:10,325
and say, "Here's the deal,
here's the address,
1261
01:06:10,345 --> 01:06:12,013
"show up, it'll be a lovely time,
1262
01:06:12,097 --> 01:06:14,954
"and you can have a nice day
swimming and carrying on with drinks,
1263
01:06:14,974 --> 01:06:16,935
and you'd get to meet Rock."
1264
01:06:17,018 --> 01:06:20,563
Then it would just be chaise lounges
1265
01:06:20,605 --> 01:06:23,149
and boys in the pool.
1266
01:06:23,233 --> 01:06:25,443
It was clothing optional.
1267
01:06:25,485 --> 01:06:28,947
And a lot of 'em, fortunately,
did take the option.
1268
01:06:30,490 --> 01:06:34,285
You know, even for
an ordinary gay man like me,
1269
01:06:34,327 --> 01:06:36,204
that was an amazing thing to see
1270
01:06:36,287 --> 01:06:37,936
all these beauties
gathered around the pool.
1271
01:06:37,956 --> 01:06:40,397
If you're gonna have a party
with a bunch of young men,
1272
01:06:40,417 --> 01:06:42,440
you want to bring up
the eye candy, if you will.
1273
01:06:42,460 --> 01:06:45,547
It was a lot of beefcake,
1274
01:06:45,630 --> 01:06:48,550
and it would last all afternoon.
1275
01:06:48,633 --> 01:06:51,177
Endless, you know, food and drink,
1276
01:06:51,261 --> 01:06:55,098
and Rock sort of just strolling through.
1277
01:06:55,140 --> 01:06:56,340
It was theater.
1278
01:07:06,151 --> 01:07:10,864
In 1976, I was cast in a play
called "John Brown's Body."
1279
01:07:10,947 --> 01:07:14,784
It starred Rock Hudson,
Claire Trevor, and Leif Erickson.
1280
01:07:14,826 --> 01:07:20,665
It was a really beautiful mix
of music and dance and vocal.
1281
01:07:20,707 --> 01:07:24,544
So that's, you know, that's
how I came to meet Rock Hudson.
1282
01:07:24,627 --> 01:07:28,465
Armies of shadows and the shadow-sound.
1283
01:07:28,506 --> 01:07:32,177
♪ Captain Ball
was a Yankee slaver ♪
1284
01:07:32,260 --> 01:07:33,553
♪ Blow, blow... ♪
1285
01:07:33,636 --> 01:07:38,183
He really showed
a lot of people something new,
1286
01:07:38,224 --> 01:07:42,020
and it felt good to him
as a performer on stage.
1287
01:07:42,103 --> 01:07:44,981
He was really happy.
1288
01:07:45,023 --> 01:07:48,318
It was supposed to be
a fabulous big tour,
1289
01:07:48,360 --> 01:07:52,197
and we had a lot of cities set,
1290
01:07:52,280 --> 01:07:57,744
but, um, some people started
to cancel the production.
1291
01:07:57,827 --> 01:08:01,414
I think the people that
wanted to see Rock Hudson
1292
01:08:01,498 --> 01:08:04,751
wanted to see "McMillan"
or "Pillow Talk,"
1293
01:08:04,834 --> 01:08:08,713
and the people that wanted
to see "John Brown's Body,"
1294
01:08:08,755 --> 01:08:12,801
because it was so lyrical in its speech,
1295
01:08:12,884 --> 01:08:15,220
wanted Laurence Olivier.
1296
01:08:16,763 --> 01:08:20,392
We remained friends
for several years afterwards.
1297
01:08:20,433 --> 01:08:22,560
He helped me start a television career
1298
01:08:22,644 --> 01:08:27,357
on the last season of "McMillan" in 1976
1299
01:08:27,399 --> 01:08:30,026
and changed the trajectory of my life.
1300
01:08:30,068 --> 01:08:32,112
You got Big Smokey there?
1301
01:08:32,194 --> 01:08:34,072
Uh, here beside me.
1302
01:08:34,154 --> 01:08:35,740
"Big Smokey"?
1303
01:08:35,823 --> 01:08:37,742
That's you, sir.
It's CB talk.
1304
01:08:37,826 --> 01:08:41,287
And he didn't cast me
from a casting couch.
1305
01:08:41,371 --> 01:08:43,915
There was only one time that he ever,
1306
01:08:43,997 --> 01:08:47,585
um, asked me to possibly be intimate.
1307
01:08:47,627 --> 01:08:52,006
And I, I chose, um, the different path.
1308
01:08:54,050 --> 01:08:57,429
I was 23 and a lot cuter.
1309
01:08:58,971 --> 01:09:01,265
He was fun and then he was elegant,
1310
01:09:01,349 --> 01:09:07,063
and, you know, I only saw him
pee in the bushes once.
1311
01:09:11,151 --> 01:09:14,738
Hey! What's going on here?
1312
01:09:16,613 --> 01:09:18,116
Observe.
1313
01:09:18,198 --> 01:09:20,743
Hmmph!
1314
01:09:22,620 --> 01:09:26,875
I was one of the members
of the last dying gasp
1315
01:09:26,957 --> 01:09:28,335
of the studio system,
1316
01:09:28,417 --> 01:09:30,377
which was Universal Studios.
1317
01:09:30,462 --> 01:09:33,548
I'll never forget this great
head of the talent department.
1318
01:09:33,631 --> 01:09:37,301
She's on the phone, "Darling,
are you sitting down?"
1319
01:09:37,385 --> 01:09:39,679
And I said,
"Yes, I'm sitting down."
1320
01:09:39,763 --> 01:09:44,309
She says, "Rock Hudson,
you're going to be playing his son."
1321
01:09:47,645 --> 01:09:50,774
It was a 10-hour epic mini-series
1322
01:09:50,814 --> 01:09:53,484
that they were doing
tons of at that time.
1323
01:09:53,568 --> 01:09:57,197
And Rock plays a designer
of automobiles in Detroit.
1324
01:09:57,280 --> 01:09:59,616
Dad, I'm telling you,
I can handle this by myself.
1325
01:09:59,657 --> 01:10:01,076
I know you can.
1326
01:10:01,159 --> 01:10:02,494
I'm proud that you want to.
1327
01:10:02,535 --> 01:10:04,746
Even though you knew the rumors,
1328
01:10:04,829 --> 01:10:08,541
you still couldn't
erase the false narrative
1329
01:10:08,625 --> 01:10:10,460
of that straight leading man.
1330
01:10:10,502 --> 01:10:13,421
That was the message
that was given to all of us
1331
01:10:13,505 --> 01:10:15,048
growing up in that time,
1332
01:10:15,131 --> 01:10:19,302
young men, and certainly young
men who aspired to be actors.
1333
01:10:19,344 --> 01:10:21,346
For gay men like me,
1334
01:10:21,429 --> 01:10:25,350
there was absolutely
zero permission to be gay.
1335
01:10:25,392 --> 01:10:27,936
It was just not going to be allowed.
1336
01:10:28,019 --> 01:10:30,480
So I carried that with me.
1337
01:10:32,399 --> 01:10:35,777
Well, the time has come.
You've seen the map.
1338
01:10:35,860 --> 01:10:38,363
Reagan is our projected winner.
1339
01:10:38,405 --> 01:10:41,074
A sports announcer, a film actor,
1340
01:10:41,157 --> 01:10:42,575
a governor of California.
1341
01:10:42,659 --> 01:10:45,328
We have projected
Ronald Reagan the winner.
1342
01:10:45,370 --> 01:10:47,831
Did you ever think a few years ago
1343
01:10:47,872 --> 01:10:50,500
that Ronald Reagan, fellow
actor, would be president?
1344
01:10:50,542 --> 01:10:52,544
I mean, is that,
an actor being president?
1345
01:10:52,585 --> 01:10:54,671
- No, I, I didn't.
- Pretty amazing, huh?
1346
01:10:54,713 --> 01:10:56,798
Yeah, it's terrific, as a matter of fact.
1347
01:10:56,881 --> 01:10:58,758
Well, Rock was a Republican.
1348
01:10:58,842 --> 01:11:00,802
I can't believe it, but he was.
1349
01:11:00,885 --> 01:11:03,722
Yeah, but that was a different
generation Republican.
1350
01:11:03,763 --> 01:11:05,223
Yes.
1351
01:11:05,306 --> 01:11:08,601
Uh, he was a Republican primarily because
1352
01:11:08,685 --> 01:11:11,062
he was friends with Nancy Reagan.
1353
01:11:11,146 --> 01:11:12,939
Apparently pretty close friends.
1354
01:11:13,023 --> 01:11:17,777
But she couldn't get Reagan
to say anything about AIDS
1355
01:11:17,861 --> 01:11:22,782
until finally at one point he gave in.
1356
01:11:22,866 --> 01:11:24,743
But that was after...
1357
01:11:24,826 --> 01:11:28,204
- That was after he died, I think, right?
- After he died.
1358
01:11:28,246 --> 01:11:29,723
The Centers for Disease Control
1359
01:11:29,748 --> 01:11:32,125
reports that six gay men in Los Angeles
1360
01:11:32,208 --> 01:11:35,086
have fallen ill from a strange
and mysterious pneumonia.
1361
01:11:35,128 --> 01:11:39,174
Scientists at the National Centers
for Disease Control in Atlanta today
1362
01:11:39,257 --> 01:11:40,884
released the results of a study,
1363
01:11:40,925 --> 01:11:44,763
which shows that the lifestyle
of some male homosexuals
1364
01:11:44,804 --> 01:11:47,807
has triggered an epidemic
of a rare form of cancer.
1365
01:11:47,891 --> 01:11:49,642
Researchers are now studying
1366
01:11:49,726 --> 01:11:51,416
blood and other samples from the victims,
1367
01:11:51,436 --> 01:11:53,418
trying to learn
what is causing the disease.
1368
01:11:53,438 --> 01:11:55,774
So far, they have had no luck.
1369
01:11:55,815 --> 01:11:58,530
Rock, can you believe the
things that are happening today?
1370
01:11:58,568 --> 01:12:00,653
Oh, it's pretty crazy, all right.
1371
01:12:00,737 --> 01:12:03,865
I mean, the way everyone
dresses, the lifestyles,
1372
01:12:03,948 --> 01:12:05,200
the, the new morality.
1373
01:12:05,283 --> 01:12:07,577
Yeah. Maybe we're
getting old.
1374
01:12:07,619 --> 01:12:10,288
Look, Rock, if you can't
say anything constructive...
1375
01:12:10,372 --> 01:12:12,665
Okay...
1376
01:12:12,749 --> 01:12:13,541
I'm getting old.
1377
01:12:13,625 --> 01:12:14,959
That's constructive.
1378
01:12:16,920 --> 01:12:20,715
When you consider Rock Hudson's
1379
01:12:20,799 --> 01:12:23,968
overwork, stress, chain smoking,
1380
01:12:24,052 --> 01:12:25,428
the alcohol intake...
1381
01:12:25,470 --> 01:12:27,430
- You wanna smoke a cigarette?
- Yes.
1382
01:12:27,472 --> 01:12:29,120
Why do you wanna smoke a cigarette?
1383
01:12:29,140 --> 01:12:31,617
It's not good for you, but
you can smoke a cigarette.
1384
01:12:31,643 --> 01:12:32,874
- You want a lecture?
- Yeah.
1385
01:12:32,894 --> 01:12:35,271
- Okay. You got it.
- I'm thinking of quitting.
1386
01:12:35,313 --> 01:12:37,045
- And then you'll do it?
- I have to quit.
1387
01:12:37,065 --> 01:12:41,027
All of that results
in quintuple bypass surgery
1388
01:12:41,111 --> 01:12:42,821
in 1981.
1389
01:12:42,862 --> 01:12:45,136
I don't know if I could ask
everybody to let us see your scar.
1390
01:12:45,156 --> 01:12:47,867
But I don't think that's
the right thing to do.
1391
01:12:47,951 --> 01:12:50,517
You're looking really terrific.
When are you going back to work?
1392
01:12:50,537 --> 01:12:52,330
I think around mid-January.
1393
01:12:52,831 --> 01:12:55,041
By 1982,
1394
01:12:55,125 --> 01:12:56,626
we saw how devastating
1395
01:12:56,668 --> 01:12:58,837
AIDS could be for a person,
1396
01:12:58,920 --> 01:13:00,130
how people developed
1397
01:13:00,171 --> 01:13:03,049
one infection after another
1398
01:13:03,133 --> 01:13:05,260
and kind of just wasted away,
1399
01:13:05,343 --> 01:13:06,761
in front of us.
1400
01:13:06,845 --> 01:13:08,555
And it was very frightening.
1401
01:13:08,638 --> 01:13:10,265
There was little happening
1402
01:13:10,348 --> 01:13:12,434
in the way of a public response.
1403
01:13:12,517 --> 01:13:15,812
There was no money available
to do research.
1404
01:13:15,854 --> 01:13:18,148
You are raising the possibility
1405
01:13:18,231 --> 01:13:21,631
that people are dismissing it because
it strikes mostly the gay community?
1406
01:13:21,651 --> 01:13:24,779
There is no question in my mind,
if this were happening to you
1407
01:13:24,863 --> 01:13:27,012
and the white, straight,
middle-class community,
1408
01:13:27,032 --> 01:13:29,784
it would've been
attended to a long time ago.
1409
01:13:29,868 --> 01:13:34,164
There was all this conservative
religious overtones
1410
01:13:34,205 --> 01:13:35,540
in the Reagan administration
1411
01:13:35,623 --> 01:13:39,544
where evangelicals
had elected Ronald Reagan
1412
01:13:39,627 --> 01:13:42,130
and in his cabinet were people
1413
01:13:42,213 --> 01:13:43,923
who essentially said,
1414
01:13:44,007 --> 01:13:45,550
"Do nothing."
1415
01:13:48,303 --> 01:13:51,014
By this time, Rock
had made a lot of money
1416
01:13:51,056 --> 01:13:52,557
working in television.
1417
01:13:52,599 --> 01:13:54,476
He was loaded.
1418
01:13:54,559 --> 01:13:57,771
But old friends Mark
and George, not so much.
1419
01:13:57,854 --> 01:14:00,899
George Nader had glaucoma
and had stopped acting.
1420
01:14:00,982 --> 01:14:04,903
So Rock hired Mark Miller
to be his personal secretary.
1421
01:14:04,986 --> 01:14:07,489
That not only rescued
Nader and Miller financially,
1422
01:14:07,572 --> 01:14:12,911
but it would also guarantee that his
closest friends would remain close.
1423
01:14:12,952 --> 01:14:16,581
And of course, through all of
this, Nader is keeping his diaries,
1424
01:14:16,664 --> 01:14:19,084
which are a veritable gold mine
1425
01:14:19,167 --> 01:14:22,796
of eyewitness accounts.
1426
01:14:22,879 --> 01:14:27,133
Thursday, May 31st, 1984.
1427
01:14:27,217 --> 01:14:29,260
Mark called at 7 a.m.
1428
01:14:29,344 --> 01:14:30,845
Something seriously wrong!
1429
01:14:30,929 --> 01:14:33,264
Nancy Reagan sent photos
from the dinner party
1430
01:14:33,348 --> 01:14:35,975
with a note saying that
Rock must have that pimple
1431
01:14:36,059 --> 01:14:37,477
on his neck checked.
1432
01:14:37,560 --> 01:14:39,104
It showed up in the photos.
1433
01:14:39,187 --> 01:14:41,773
Otherwise, the photos
are great of Nancy, Ronnie,
1434
01:14:41,815 --> 01:14:43,316
and Rock at the dinner.
1435
01:14:43,400 --> 01:14:45,402
Rock back to Beverly Hills.
1436
01:14:45,443 --> 01:14:46,903
Mark insisted that Rock
1437
01:14:46,945 --> 01:14:48,947
go to see the doctor immediately.
1438
01:14:48,988 --> 01:14:51,741
He agreed.
Mark made an appointment.
1439
01:14:51,783 --> 01:14:54,432
Let me begin with the latest
figures from Los Angeles County.
1440
01:14:54,452 --> 01:14:57,706
Today they show 56 new cases of AIDS
1441
01:14:57,789 --> 01:14:59,874
diagnosed here locally last month.
1442
01:14:59,958 --> 01:15:03,420
That brings the national total
now to about 10,000 cases
1443
01:15:03,461 --> 01:15:05,672
cases of AIDS.
1444
01:15:05,755 --> 01:15:08,842
Tuesday, June 5th, 1984.
1445
01:15:08,925 --> 01:15:12,554
Mark called and asked me
to note the time and date
1446
01:15:12,637 --> 01:15:14,305
of all of the following:
1447
01:15:14,389 --> 01:15:18,476
At 2:25 p.m., driving Rock
home from the doctor's,
1448
01:15:18,518 --> 01:15:23,773
he was told by Rock that Rock
has AIDS and possible cancer.
1449
01:15:23,815 --> 01:15:27,569
A lymph gland in his neck
had just been removed.
1450
01:15:27,652 --> 01:15:29,821
Around 6:30 p.m.-ish,
1451
01:15:29,863 --> 01:15:31,990
I dialed Rock at The Castle and said,
1452
01:15:32,073 --> 01:15:35,118
if there was anything at all,
let me know.
1453
01:15:35,160 --> 01:15:38,079
He said, the only thing was silence.
1454
01:15:38,163 --> 01:15:40,999
I said, "Of course," and thought,
1455
01:15:41,082 --> 01:15:43,523
"Who in the hell am I gonna
call and talk about it to?'"
1456
01:15:43,543 --> 01:15:46,588
Are you the big macho type
that nothing's gonna get?
1457
01:15:46,671 --> 01:15:48,298
No, not at all.
Not at all.
1458
01:15:48,340 --> 01:15:52,385
I am, I have, like everybody
else, weaknesses and strengths.
1459
01:15:52,469 --> 01:15:54,179
But...
1460
01:15:54,262 --> 01:15:58,683
one of the strengths,
I suppose, perhaps stupidly so,
1461
01:15:58,767 --> 01:16:01,102
is that I will not be sick.
1462
01:16:01,186 --> 01:16:03,730
I will not be dependent
upon anybody else,
1463
01:16:03,813 --> 01:16:06,358
and I simply won't have it.
1464
01:16:06,399 --> 01:16:08,443
In 1984,
1465
01:16:08,526 --> 01:16:10,195
I was asked to see
1466
01:16:10,278 --> 01:16:12,072
a celebrity patient,
1467
01:16:12,155 --> 01:16:16,034
Rock Hudson, and determined
in fact that he did have AIDS.
1468
01:16:16,076 --> 01:16:20,580
I guided him as best I could
and sent him to France
1469
01:16:20,663 --> 01:16:24,709
to participate in a clinical
trial of an antiviral drug.
1470
01:16:26,836 --> 01:16:30,131
Most people are born gulls
and judge a man by his dress.
1471
01:16:30,215 --> 01:16:32,550
We live in a world of phantasmagoria,
1472
01:16:32,634 --> 01:16:34,678
false forms and false faces.
1473
01:16:34,719 --> 01:16:37,389
Each man wears a mask
against his fellows.
1474
01:16:37,472 --> 01:16:39,432
Well, have you nothing to say?
1475
01:16:39,516 --> 01:16:41,685
Aye, gimme a light.
1476
01:16:42,102 --> 01:16:45,563
Rock Hudson was in a different league.
1477
01:16:45,605 --> 01:16:48,233
I always liked him.
1478
01:16:48,316 --> 01:16:52,445
He seemed to fulfill all
the dreams that, you know,
1479
01:16:52,529 --> 01:16:55,490
I would have for a star.
1480
01:16:55,573 --> 01:16:57,742
When the time came to find
1481
01:16:57,826 --> 01:17:00,912
a person to play opposite Linda Evans,
1482
01:17:00,954 --> 01:17:03,081
I thought about Rock Hudson.
1483
01:17:03,123 --> 01:17:08,503
So I and my publicist,
we flew to Paris to meet him.
1484
01:17:08,586 --> 01:17:11,006
I hadn't seen him for a few years.
1485
01:17:11,089 --> 01:17:13,925
He might have been five
pounds thinner, I don't know.
1486
01:17:13,967 --> 01:17:17,095
But he seemed incredible.
1487
01:17:17,137 --> 01:17:21,224
When he turns on that smile,
it's unbelievable.
1488
01:17:21,933 --> 01:17:24,769
He met us and I had the script.
1489
01:17:24,811 --> 01:17:27,731
I just wanted him to read
the script and say yes.
1490
01:17:27,772 --> 01:17:31,568
And then he said, "Well, why don't
we have dinner?" So I said, "Okay."
1491
01:17:31,609 --> 01:17:33,278
So we went with him,
1492
01:17:33,319 --> 01:17:35,989
and it was the most marvelous night.
1493
01:17:36,072 --> 01:17:39,951
He was so energetic
and he went from restaurant
1494
01:17:39,993 --> 01:17:41,911
to bar to restaurant.
1495
01:17:41,953 --> 01:17:44,122
He kept drinking more and more vodka
1496
01:17:44,164 --> 01:17:46,458
and he got bawdier and bawdier.
1497
01:17:46,541 --> 01:17:49,586
And I thought, "Oh, my God,
is this ever gonna end?"
1498
01:17:49,627 --> 01:17:51,880
He held out that whole night.
1499
01:17:51,963 --> 01:17:54,674
I mean, you have no idea
what it was like.
1500
01:17:55,884 --> 01:17:58,887
And at 2:30 in the morning,
he said,
1501
01:17:58,970 --> 01:18:02,265
"I read the script and I
loved it and I will do it."
1502
01:18:02,766 --> 01:18:07,187
This winter finds Hudson on
location with ABC's "Dynasty."
1503
01:18:07,270 --> 01:18:10,032
You've said before that you
really didn't have any interest
1504
01:18:10,106 --> 01:18:12,150
in coming back to doing
series television.
1505
01:18:12,233 --> 01:18:15,028
What did "Dynasty" offer
that made you reconsider that?
1506
01:18:15,111 --> 01:18:17,072
Well, I'm not on every week,
1507
01:18:17,155 --> 01:18:20,408
and, uh, uh...
1508
01:18:20,492 --> 01:18:22,160
it's a good show, obviously.
1509
01:18:22,202 --> 01:18:26,373
I mean, it's, uh, very popular
all over the world,
1510
01:18:26,456 --> 01:18:30,168
so why not to do six or so shows?
1511
01:18:30,251 --> 01:18:34,339
So, for six or so shows,
nobody's saying exactly how many,
1512
01:18:34,381 --> 01:18:37,050
Rock Hudson is playing
the role of Daniel Reece,
1513
01:18:37,133 --> 01:18:39,844
a sophisticated horse breeder
with romantic designs
1514
01:18:39,886 --> 01:18:41,554
on Krystle Carrington.
1515
01:18:41,638 --> 01:18:43,515
I think he's a divine actor.
1516
01:18:43,556 --> 01:18:45,350
He's wonderfully romantic.
1517
01:18:45,433 --> 01:18:47,185
He's a lovely man.
1518
01:18:47,769 --> 01:18:49,979
Well, they told us they had
1519
01:18:50,021 --> 01:18:53,692
some superstars they were
gonna have on the show,
1520
01:18:53,775 --> 01:18:57,862
which we thought, great, this is fun.
1521
01:18:57,946 --> 01:18:59,864
I, of course, was thrilled
1522
01:18:59,948 --> 01:19:02,283
because I did
a "McMillan & Wife."
1523
01:19:02,367 --> 01:19:04,369
Aquarius.
How do you do, Commissioner?
1524
01:19:04,452 --> 01:19:05,787
Nicole, what a lovely name.
1525
01:19:05,870 --> 01:19:08,498
And I thought, how fantastic
1526
01:19:08,581 --> 01:19:11,376
to be able to work with him again.
1527
01:19:11,418 --> 01:19:13,128
But he was so much thinner
1528
01:19:13,211 --> 01:19:16,881
and didn't look like he felt good.
1529
01:19:16,965 --> 01:19:20,010
I think he even said
he'd been traveling a lot
1530
01:19:20,051 --> 01:19:22,095
and he inferred that, you know,
1531
01:19:22,178 --> 01:19:23,847
"We've all been away on a trip
1532
01:19:23,888 --> 01:19:25,807
and caught something
somewhere."
1533
01:19:25,849 --> 01:19:29,394
So I went, "Oh, you know,
life does that to us."
1534
01:19:29,477 --> 01:19:33,815
And, uh, that's about as much
as I thought about it.
1535
01:19:35,650 --> 01:19:38,903
Wednesday, December 19th, 1984.
1536
01:19:38,945 --> 01:19:41,489
"Dynasty." Rock's debut.
1537
01:19:41,573 --> 01:19:44,534
Merry Christmas, Krystie,
it's good to see you.
1538
01:19:44,576 --> 01:19:46,995
Did well, but looked bad,
1539
01:19:47,078 --> 01:19:48,788
very bad in a couple of shots.
1540
01:19:48,872 --> 01:19:50,915
I'm here to return this.
1541
01:19:52,459 --> 01:19:56,087
How dare you come back
into my life after what you did.
1542
01:19:57,088 --> 01:19:59,674
Cameraman could have helped
more with lighting,
1543
01:19:59,758 --> 01:20:02,427
I think, but perhaps no time.
1544
01:20:09,934 --> 01:20:13,480
Tuesday, February 5th, 1985.
1545
01:20:13,563 --> 01:20:15,023
Tonight "Dynasty,"
1546
01:20:15,106 --> 01:20:18,193
and we get to watch Rock
give Linda Evans a dose
1547
01:20:18,276 --> 01:20:20,945
of some virus in a kissing scene.
1548
01:20:21,029 --> 01:20:22,947
I will tape the fateful footage,
1549
01:20:22,989 --> 01:20:25,116
if not too frozen in horror,
1550
01:20:25,200 --> 01:20:28,058
akin to watching someone
receive a possible lethal injection.
1551
01:20:28,119 --> 01:20:29,601
You look more frightened than I was...
1552
01:20:29,621 --> 01:20:32,582
Morally, how guilty are we
1553
01:20:32,624 --> 01:20:37,212
for not having said something
to someone, anyone?
1554
01:20:39,798 --> 01:20:42,467
Rock returned from work the
day they shot the kiss scene
1555
01:20:42,509 --> 01:20:45,637
and said to Mark, "This has
been the worst day of my life.
1556
01:20:45,679 --> 01:20:49,474
"I used every possible type
of mouthwash known to man.
1557
01:20:49,516 --> 01:20:51,142
An awful day.'
1558
01:20:51,226 --> 01:20:55,522
He also said, "I kept my
mouth closed and so did she."
1559
01:20:56,564 --> 01:21:01,027
When we had that scene
we had to do with the kiss,
1560
01:21:01,111 --> 01:21:03,196
that was a pivotal moment.
1561
01:21:03,279 --> 01:21:06,491
We showed up that day and shot that scene
1562
01:21:06,574 --> 01:21:10,161
and it didn't turn out like they wanted.
1563
01:21:10,203 --> 01:21:14,165
Nobody quite knew what to do.
1564
01:21:14,207 --> 01:21:17,168
I mean, I knew he could
deliver that kiss.
1565
01:21:17,252 --> 01:21:19,713
It's not up to me to say anything.
1566
01:21:19,796 --> 01:21:22,298
And I let the director handle it,
1567
01:21:22,340 --> 01:21:24,592
and we did it over and we did it over.
1568
01:21:24,676 --> 01:21:27,887
And he did it consistently.
1569
01:21:30,765 --> 01:21:35,812
It makes me cry because
I know he was protecting me.
1570
01:21:35,854 --> 01:21:37,897
I mean, I didn't know that at the time.
1571
01:21:37,981 --> 01:21:39,983
I was confused at the time.
1572
01:21:40,025 --> 01:21:41,860
But in thinking back,
1573
01:21:41,901 --> 01:21:45,405
part of the reason that I get so upset
1574
01:21:45,488 --> 01:21:50,035
is that he was doing
everything he could do
1575
01:21:50,118 --> 01:21:52,037
to make it all right for me, in case.
1576
01:21:52,120 --> 01:21:55,498
'Cause nobody knew
in those days about that.
1577
01:21:55,540 --> 01:21:57,292
Touches my heart.
1578
01:21:57,375 --> 01:21:59,461
Even now, when I think about it.
1579
01:22:01,421 --> 01:22:04,466
Saturday, April 6th, 1985.
1580
01:22:04,549 --> 01:22:07,218
The three of us drove through Joshua Tree
1581
01:22:07,302 --> 01:22:09,596
where Rock had never been before.
1582
01:22:09,679 --> 01:22:13,308
On the way there, the old
song "Mockin' Bird Hill" came on.
1583
01:22:13,433 --> 01:22:17,312
♪ Tra-la-la twittle-dee-dee-dee,
it gives me... ♪
1584
01:22:17,395 --> 01:22:19,189
We all roared with laughter.
1585
01:22:19,230 --> 01:22:22,442
Thirty years before, the
song had been our favorite,
1586
01:22:22,525 --> 01:22:25,111
and we sang it in unison
with the singer on the radio.
1587
01:22:25,195 --> 01:22:27,739
♪ Tra-la-la
twittle-dee-dee-dee ♪
1588
01:22:27,822 --> 01:22:30,408
♪ There's peace
and goodwill ♪
1589
01:22:30,450 --> 01:22:33,328
♪ You're welcome
as the flowers ♪
1590
01:22:33,411 --> 01:22:36,539
♪ On Mockin' Bird Hill... ♪
1591
01:22:36,581 --> 01:22:38,583
By the time we finished the song,
1592
01:22:38,625 --> 01:22:39,751
we were all in tears.
1593
01:22:39,834 --> 01:22:41,628
Mark and I knew for sure
1594
01:22:41,711 --> 01:22:46,049
Rock had come down to the
desert on Easter to say goodbye.
1595
01:22:46,091 --> 01:22:49,469
Even if we see him again,
this is still it.
1596
01:22:49,552 --> 01:22:51,388
A farewell.
1597
01:22:56,935 --> 01:22:58,395
Hello.
1598
01:22:58,436 --> 01:22:59,813
I love my roses!
1599
01:22:59,896 --> 01:23:01,231
Well, hiya.
1600
01:23:01,272 --> 01:23:04,109
I am thrilled that you
are gonna do my show.
1601
01:23:04,192 --> 01:23:06,277
- I am too.
- You're my first guest.
1602
01:23:06,319 --> 01:23:08,113
- Is that right?
- Very first one.
1603
01:23:08,196 --> 01:23:09,803
'Cause you're a very special guest.
1604
01:23:09,823 --> 01:23:11,616
Well, I am delighted about that.
1605
01:23:12,951 --> 01:23:14,911
The public started seeing
1606
01:23:14,953 --> 01:23:18,540
a major decline in his appearance.
1607
01:23:18,623 --> 01:23:22,919
That's when we began
to understand what it was.
1608
01:23:22,961 --> 01:23:25,422
Even we thought it was AIDS.
1609
01:23:25,714 --> 01:23:27,674
All right, how did you know?
1610
01:23:27,757 --> 01:23:29,592
I saw his hand.
1611
01:23:30,218 --> 01:23:32,887
- What did you see?
- The beginning of a lesion.
1612
01:23:32,971 --> 01:23:34,536
Discoloration.
Softness of tissue.
1613
01:23:34,556 --> 01:23:37,100
That could have been
anything... yaws, psoriasis,
1614
01:23:37,142 --> 01:23:39,310
the beginning of any ordinary skin rash.
1615
01:23:39,394 --> 01:23:41,104
What made you so certain?
1616
01:23:41,146 --> 01:23:43,148
I just knew, that's all.
1617
01:23:43,231 --> 01:23:46,651
- You mean you guessed.
- No, I knew.
1618
01:23:46,735 --> 01:23:48,111
Hmm.
1619
01:23:48,153 --> 01:23:51,531
Thursday, July 18th, 1985.
1620
01:23:51,614 --> 01:23:55,994
Rock exhausted and
really downhill and a mess.
1621
01:23:56,036 --> 01:23:57,871
"He looks awful," Mark says.
1622
01:23:57,954 --> 01:23:59,831
Mark broached subject of Paris,
1623
01:23:59,873 --> 01:24:01,875
got Rock to listen.
1624
01:24:01,958 --> 01:24:03,543
Rock heaved a sigh and said,
1625
01:24:03,626 --> 01:24:07,172
"Well, okay, I guess I'd
better go back over there."
1626
01:24:07,255 --> 01:24:09,507
Just what is wrong with Rock Hudson?
1627
01:24:09,549 --> 01:24:11,384
Tonight, the 59-year-old actor
1628
01:24:11,468 --> 01:24:13,720
remains in a Paris hospital
undergoing tests,
1629
01:24:13,803 --> 01:24:16,306
but the nature of his illness
has become clouded
1630
01:24:16,348 --> 01:24:17,932
in mystery and confusion.
1631
01:24:17,974 --> 01:24:19,456
Yesterday, it was reported that Hudson
1632
01:24:19,476 --> 01:24:21,394
had liver cancer and possibly AIDS,
1633
01:24:21,478 --> 01:24:24,105
but today the hospital
denied the cancer story
1634
01:24:24,189 --> 01:24:26,358
and said nothing about the AIDS rumor.
1635
01:24:26,399 --> 01:24:28,651
A spokesman just said Hudson was tired.
1636
01:24:29,444 --> 01:24:31,363
At that point, I don't know what degree
1637
01:24:31,446 --> 01:24:33,907
Rock was actually making decisions,
1638
01:24:33,990 --> 01:24:37,369
but Ross Hunter was still saying
1639
01:24:37,410 --> 01:24:42,499
Rock had anorexia
and a lot of feeble excuses.
1640
01:24:44,000 --> 01:24:46,419
After collapsing at the Ritz,
1641
01:24:46,503 --> 01:24:49,964
Hudson is rushed to the
American Hospital of Paris.
1642
01:24:50,048 --> 01:24:52,509
And at that point, it's determined
1643
01:24:52,550 --> 01:24:54,469
that Hudson could be better cared for
1644
01:24:54,552 --> 01:24:57,180
at a nearby military hospital.
1645
01:24:57,263 --> 01:25:00,141
So Rock's publicist, Dale
Olson, sends a telegram
1646
01:25:00,225 --> 01:25:01,893
to Reagan's press secretary,
1647
01:25:01,976 --> 01:25:05,313
in which he explains that
time is running out for Rock.
1648
01:25:05,397 --> 01:25:08,274
And Percy Hospital will not admit him
1649
01:25:08,358 --> 01:25:10,777
because Hudson isn't a French citizen.
1650
01:25:10,860 --> 01:25:14,906
Would the White House
be willing to intervene?
1651
01:25:14,948 --> 01:25:17,242
Nancy Reagan declines.
1652
01:25:18,576 --> 01:25:21,204
You know, I think that non-responsiveness
1653
01:25:21,246 --> 01:25:23,540
to the personal plea from the publicist
1654
01:25:23,581 --> 01:25:27,085
encapsulates the entire
Reagan administration's
1655
01:25:27,127 --> 01:25:29,796
non-responsiveness to the epidemic.
1656
01:25:29,879 --> 01:25:34,926
His hands will be stained
forever with innocent blood.
1657
01:25:39,723 --> 01:25:42,100
Nothing. He looks wonderful,
I must say.
1658
01:25:42,183 --> 01:25:43,893
- Did he talk to you?
- Yes, he did.
1659
01:25:43,935 --> 01:25:46,521
- What did he say?
- He said, "How are you?"
1660
01:25:46,604 --> 01:25:48,773
I said, "I'm fine."
1661
01:25:49,315 --> 01:25:53,028
Thursday, July 25th, 1985.
1662
01:25:53,111 --> 01:25:55,780
Big day in Paris, France.
1663
01:25:55,822 --> 01:25:59,617
The orchestrated ruination
of Rock Hudson's life.
1664
01:26:02,037 --> 01:26:03,872
I was sent to his room
1665
01:26:03,955 --> 01:26:06,207
to read the statement
and have his approval.
1666
01:26:06,291 --> 01:26:10,128
And that's one of the
weirdest things I did in my life,
1667
01:26:10,170 --> 01:26:14,007
because I know that if Rock
would've been strong enough
1668
01:26:14,090 --> 01:26:17,886
to decide not to tell the world
that he had AIDS, he would do it.
1669
01:26:18,595 --> 01:26:23,975
He looked at my eyes and, uh, he say,
1670
01:26:24,017 --> 01:26:25,643
"That's what they want, Yanou.
1671
01:26:25,685 --> 01:26:28,480
Go and give that
to the dogs."
1672
01:26:28,521 --> 01:26:32,484
Mr. Rock Hudson has Acquired
1673
01:26:32,567 --> 01:26:35,028
Immunodeficiency Syndrome...
1674
01:26:36,404 --> 01:26:38,656
...which was diagnosed
1675
01:26:38,740 --> 01:26:40,784
over a year ago
1676
01:26:40,825 --> 01:26:42,452
in the United States.
1677
01:26:42,535 --> 01:26:45,330
Mark watched and listened from a lounge
1678
01:26:45,413 --> 01:26:48,500
and sobbed all the way
through Yanou's statement.
1679
01:26:48,541 --> 01:26:52,128
When it was over,
he went up and told Rock.
1680
01:26:52,212 --> 01:26:56,007
Rock said, "God, what a way
to end a life."
1681
01:26:56,758 --> 01:26:59,094
Is this what you call news?
1682
01:26:59,177 --> 01:27:01,179
You know what I call it?
1683
01:27:01,221 --> 01:27:03,390
I call it the dead facts.
1684
01:27:03,473 --> 01:27:05,266
The dead facts strung together
1685
01:27:05,350 --> 01:27:07,769
by a deaf-dumb-blind editor!
1686
01:27:07,852 --> 01:27:09,521
After three days of confusion
1687
01:27:09,604 --> 01:27:11,481
at the American Hospital in Paris,
1688
01:27:11,523 --> 01:27:14,025
a spokesperson for Rock Hudson...
1689
01:27:14,067 --> 01:27:15,735
...American actor
Rock Hudson...
1690
01:27:15,819 --> 01:27:18,321
...American Hospital
in Paris, France,
1691
01:27:18,363 --> 01:27:20,657
for treatment of
an inoperable liver cancer...
1692
01:27:20,699 --> 01:27:24,369
I've got the story.
I've got it in my aching heart,
1693
01:27:24,411 --> 01:27:26,371
and you want to know how I got it?
1694
01:27:26,413 --> 01:27:29,749
By crawling through dirt and filth
1695
01:27:29,833 --> 01:27:31,543
and muck and smut.
1696
01:27:31,584 --> 01:27:33,211
By finding truth and beauty
1697
01:27:33,294 --> 01:27:35,130
where you'd never expect to find it.
1698
01:27:35,213 --> 01:27:36,820
Another case of AIDS has been confirmed,
1699
01:27:36,840 --> 01:27:39,175
affecting the most well-known victim yet.
1700
01:27:39,217 --> 01:27:41,344
He forsook all earthbound vanities,
1701
01:27:41,386 --> 01:27:43,972
home, family and love.
1702
01:27:44,055 --> 01:27:45,255
Why?
1703
01:27:45,306 --> 01:27:47,392
Because deep down he knew
1704
01:27:47,475 --> 01:27:49,394
that a man without blood in his veins
1705
01:27:49,436 --> 01:27:52,480
has got to fall down sooner or later.
1706
01:27:52,564 --> 01:27:54,524
Actor Rock Hudson has AIDS,
1707
01:27:54,566 --> 01:27:56,735
Acquired Immunodeficiency Syndrome.
1708
01:27:57,944 --> 01:27:59,571
I feel empty.
1709
01:28:00,905 --> 01:28:02,105
Dead.
1710
01:28:02,157 --> 01:28:03,700
I just feel dirty.
1711
01:28:03,742 --> 01:28:04,942
I feel unclean.
1712
01:28:06,161 --> 01:28:08,705
Filthy business we're in.
1713
01:28:11,041 --> 01:28:13,043
Time will wash it clean.
1714
01:28:13,626 --> 01:28:15,962
Who knows how much time there is left?
1715
01:28:18,757 --> 01:28:21,718
I do remember, uh, when
I first came to New York,
1716
01:28:21,760 --> 01:28:23,928
I was walking through Greenwich Village
1717
01:28:24,012 --> 01:28:27,390
and I passed a newsstand
and the headline said,
1718
01:28:27,432 --> 01:28:29,392
"Rock Hudson has AIDS."
1719
01:28:29,434 --> 01:28:33,313
And it... I absolutely,
I stopped breathing.
1720
01:28:33,396 --> 01:28:36,358
I will never, ever,
ever forget that moment
1721
01:28:36,441 --> 01:28:39,819
of just, this can't be.
1722
01:28:39,903 --> 01:28:43,490
It was everything
kind of wrapped up in one.
1723
01:28:43,573 --> 01:28:46,117
It was Hollywood and the closet
1724
01:28:46,201 --> 01:28:48,286
and the fact that Rock
1725
01:28:48,370 --> 01:28:50,288
had lived his life not able
1726
01:28:50,330 --> 01:28:52,374
to express who he was.
1727
01:28:52,457 --> 01:28:53,792
And it had come to that.
1728
01:28:53,875 --> 01:28:56,252
It scared the shit out of me.
1729
01:28:56,294 --> 01:28:58,755
It made me terrified
1730
01:28:58,797 --> 01:29:02,926
of contemplating
being out in the gay world,
1731
01:29:02,967 --> 01:29:09,724
and, um, that, I think,
delayed my coming out.
1732
01:29:09,808 --> 01:29:11,851
What's the shocking reason
1733
01:29:11,935 --> 01:29:13,812
Rock Hudson hid his tragic illness?
1734
01:29:13,853 --> 01:29:16,314
Why has the news terrified
his "Dynasty" costars?
1735
01:29:16,398 --> 01:29:18,692
- Inquiring minds want to know.
- I want to know.
1736
01:29:20,110 --> 01:29:23,446
There were, to my shock,
1737
01:29:23,488 --> 01:29:25,323
people on the set
1738
01:29:25,365 --> 01:29:28,493
who wouldn't come into the
makeup room when I was there.
1739
01:29:28,576 --> 01:29:29,953
There were people
1740
01:29:29,994 --> 01:29:31,496
who wouldn't work with me,
1741
01:29:31,579 --> 01:29:33,373
and so they had to change scenes
1742
01:29:33,456 --> 01:29:36,126
because I might have AIDS.
1743
01:29:37,168 --> 01:29:39,754
I had personal friends
1744
01:29:39,838 --> 01:29:42,257
who wouldn't come over to dinner.
1745
01:29:42,340 --> 01:29:44,426
I mean, people went into fear.
1746
01:29:44,509 --> 01:29:46,594
Tremendous fear.
1747
01:29:46,678 --> 01:29:48,680
I was never afraid I would have AIDS,
1748
01:29:48,722 --> 01:29:52,017
no matter what they printed,
what science they told me.
1749
01:29:52,058 --> 01:29:55,186
I thought, "Where's your humanity
or where's your compassion?
1750
01:29:55,270 --> 01:29:58,189
You know, what's wrong
with this world right now?"
1751
01:30:09,826 --> 01:30:12,162
The moment it was announced
1752
01:30:12,203 --> 01:30:13,913
that Rock had AIDS,
1753
01:30:13,997 --> 01:30:17,250
the hospital had only one concern:
1754
01:30:17,334 --> 01:30:19,711
get him out of the hospital.
1755
01:30:19,794 --> 01:30:23,131
They didn't want to have any
connection, the hospital, with AIDS.
1756
01:30:23,214 --> 01:30:24,841
It was terrible, you know.
1757
01:30:24,883 --> 01:30:28,720
The only concern was,
"He must go out of here."
1758
01:30:29,387 --> 01:30:32,307
And I start to call the airline
1759
01:30:32,390 --> 01:30:34,225
to book to fly back to LA.
1760
01:30:34,309 --> 01:30:37,979
And as soon I was giving
the name of the traveler,
1761
01:30:38,063 --> 01:30:41,983
the answer was, "We don't
take AIDS people on board."
1762
01:30:42,067 --> 01:30:46,154
And that's why I had to rent a plane,
1763
01:30:46,237 --> 01:30:50,450
a 747, for $250,000.
1764
01:30:50,533 --> 01:30:55,663
It was his money, and it was the
only way to bring him back home.
1765
01:30:57,415 --> 01:31:01,961
I was made so aware of the silence,
1766
01:31:02,045 --> 01:31:05,882
this huge, loud silence regarding AIDS,
1767
01:31:05,924 --> 01:31:07,717
how no one wanted to talk about it,
1768
01:31:07,759 --> 01:31:10,011
no one wanted to become involved.
1769
01:31:10,095 --> 01:31:14,182
Uh, certainly no one wanted
to give money or support.
1770
01:31:14,265 --> 01:31:20,146
And it so angered me that
I finally thought to myself,
1771
01:31:20,230 --> 01:31:23,233
"Bitch, do something yourself."
1772
01:31:24,150 --> 01:31:28,363
I started work with Elizabeth
in June of 1985
1773
01:31:28,446 --> 01:31:30,490
for the Commitment to Life event.
1774
01:31:30,573 --> 01:31:32,784
When Rock Hudson announced his illness,
1775
01:31:32,826 --> 01:31:35,036
the demand for tickets
1776
01:31:35,120 --> 01:31:36,329
skyrocketed.
1777
01:31:36,413 --> 01:31:37,664
He made
1778
01:31:37,747 --> 01:31:40,625
an incredible difference
1779
01:31:40,667 --> 01:31:42,210
in our ability to raise money.
1780
01:31:42,293 --> 01:31:44,129
Once his condition became public,
1781
01:31:44,212 --> 01:31:46,798
the Hollywood community
rallied around one of their own
1782
01:31:46,840 --> 01:31:49,134
and they turned out
for a benefit to raise money
1783
01:31:49,175 --> 01:31:50,468
with which to combat AIDS.
1784
01:31:50,552 --> 01:31:52,410
A personal message from Hudson was read
1785
01:31:52,470 --> 01:31:53,805
by actor Burt Lancaster.
1786
01:31:53,847 --> 01:31:56,975
"I'm not happy that I have AIDS,
1787
01:31:57,017 --> 01:31:59,144
"but if that is helping others,
1788
01:31:59,185 --> 01:32:01,896
"I can at least know
that my own misfortune
1789
01:32:01,980 --> 01:32:04,649
has had some positive worth."
1790
01:32:05,150 --> 01:32:07,819
Just last week,
Hudson himself contributed
1791
01:32:07,861 --> 01:32:10,155
$250,000 of his own money
1792
01:32:10,196 --> 01:32:12,244
to start a new foundation
for AIDS research.
1793
01:32:12,323 --> 01:32:15,660
It's tragic when anybody gets sick,
1794
01:32:15,702 --> 01:32:17,662
but his announcement was
1795
01:32:17,704 --> 01:32:19,956
the most profound thing
1796
01:32:19,998 --> 01:32:22,500
that had happened at that point.
1797
01:32:22,584 --> 01:32:25,253
He put a face to it.
1798
01:32:25,295 --> 01:32:27,630
He made a lot of people realize
1799
01:32:27,672 --> 01:32:29,883
that anybody could get this.
1800
01:32:29,966 --> 01:32:32,344
It helped destigmatize a disease.
1801
01:32:32,427 --> 01:32:33,845
It's hard to say
1802
01:32:33,887 --> 01:32:37,599
that he saved anyone
because no one was saved.
1803
01:32:37,682 --> 01:32:39,851
Everybody died.
1804
01:32:39,893 --> 01:32:42,645
I'll tell you one thing Rock
Hudson's announcement did do,
1805
01:32:42,687 --> 01:32:44,439
it gave people hope.
1806
01:32:44,522 --> 01:32:47,359
Because they were hopeless.
1807
01:32:53,531 --> 01:32:55,784
He got the diagnosis.
1808
01:32:55,867 --> 01:32:58,203
I was totally shocked.
1809
01:32:58,286 --> 01:33:01,581
Famous people don't get sick,
1810
01:33:01,664 --> 01:33:06,878
uh, in my world of fantasy.
1811
01:33:09,881 --> 01:33:11,800
I called up there and said,
1812
01:33:11,883 --> 01:33:15,679
"I want to come see Rock
before he passes."
1813
01:33:15,720 --> 01:33:18,723
And I was told, uh,
1814
01:33:18,765 --> 01:33:23,687
"Rock is not capable
of knowing who you are
1815
01:33:23,728 --> 01:33:27,232
"and you are better remembering him
1816
01:33:27,273 --> 01:33:29,234
in a better time."
1817
01:33:30,402 --> 01:33:32,904
And in a sense, that was true.
1818
01:33:42,747 --> 01:33:47,293
So I did not go see him, uh...
1819
01:33:47,377 --> 01:33:50,046
And I wish I had.
1820
01:33:50,088 --> 01:33:53,425
I feel very guilty for not going up
1821
01:33:53,508 --> 01:33:57,220
and holding his hand one last time.
1822
01:34:02,767 --> 01:34:05,228
What is it you think we saw, Captain?
1823
01:34:05,270 --> 01:34:10,358
The face of the devil?
A lost soul? The sinner?
1824
01:34:10,442 --> 01:34:12,235
That's the word, isn't it?
1825
01:34:12,277 --> 01:34:13,611
No, I didn't mean that.
1826
01:34:13,653 --> 01:34:14,904
Why not?
1827
01:34:14,946 --> 01:34:16,990
Let's call a sinner a sinner.
1828
01:34:17,073 --> 01:34:19,451
We're all sinners, aren't we, Captain?
1829
01:34:19,534 --> 01:34:22,203
Sinner or saint, isn't that the choice?
1830
01:34:24,706 --> 01:34:26,833
AIDS is primarily a disease
1831
01:34:26,916 --> 01:34:28,418
associated with homosexuals.
1832
01:34:28,460 --> 01:34:29,753
Talk of Hudson's lifestyle
1833
01:34:29,794 --> 01:34:31,129
has surfaced.
1834
01:34:31,171 --> 01:34:32,964
Hollywood columnist Rona Barrett.
1835
01:34:33,006 --> 01:34:34,883
At no time did Rock Hudson
1836
01:34:34,966 --> 01:34:38,845
ever flaunt his alleged homosexuality.
1837
01:34:41,806 --> 01:34:43,266
Rock was going
1838
01:34:43,308 --> 01:34:44,768
to die of AIDS, and then
1839
01:34:44,809 --> 01:34:46,478
the story would be told,
1840
01:34:46,519 --> 01:34:47,812
and I didn't want it
1841
01:34:47,854 --> 01:34:50,648
to be told in the way that the...
1842
01:34:50,732 --> 01:34:53,485
the people in Hollywood wanted it told.
1843
01:34:53,985 --> 01:34:56,488
So they think I'm a traitor.
1844
01:34:56,571 --> 01:34:58,907
I told you I'd be better off dead.
1845
01:34:58,990 --> 01:35:02,577
No man is better off dead, my friend.
1846
01:35:02,660 --> 01:35:05,455
They needed someone
to say that he was gay.
1847
01:35:05,497 --> 01:35:07,707
Nobody would say he was gay,
1848
01:35:07,791 --> 01:35:09,125
which was interpreted
1849
01:35:09,167 --> 01:35:11,044
at the time, amongst gay men,
1850
01:35:11,127 --> 01:35:12,921
as a sign of loyalty to someone.
1851
01:35:13,004 --> 01:35:14,756
But it wasn't for me.
1852
01:35:14,798 --> 01:35:18,093
I had to make the decision
at that point in my life.
1853
01:35:18,176 --> 01:35:21,471
Uh, I'm supposed
to tell the truth about this.
1854
01:35:21,513 --> 01:35:24,432
So I did an interview saying,
1855
01:35:24,516 --> 01:35:25,684
"Of course, he was gay.
1856
01:35:25,725 --> 01:35:27,435
"Everybody in Hollywood knew it
1857
01:35:27,519 --> 01:35:29,604
"and it has to be said.
1858
01:35:29,688 --> 01:35:31,314
And he was a lovely guy."
1859
01:35:31,356 --> 01:35:33,608
I stressed that.
1860
01:35:33,692 --> 01:35:36,528
"And anybody who acts shocked by this
1861
01:35:36,569 --> 01:35:38,405
"should just get over themselves
1862
01:35:38,488 --> 01:35:41,282
"because many, many people
have died already
1863
01:35:41,366 --> 01:35:42,701
who were lovely guys."
1864
01:35:43,368 --> 01:35:46,246
Everybody had to learn
at that point in history.
1865
01:35:46,329 --> 01:35:48,806
People had to learn how
to behave about this subject.
1866
01:35:48,832 --> 01:35:50,834
Like grownups, you know.
1867
01:35:52,377 --> 01:35:54,462
This lamp isn't working now.
1868
01:35:54,546 --> 01:35:56,589
It's cold and it's dark.
1869
01:35:56,673 --> 01:35:57,799
All the parts are there.
1870
01:35:57,882 --> 01:35:59,300
It's a perfect light, but...
1871
01:35:59,384 --> 01:36:00,802
It's just not turned on.
1872
01:36:00,844 --> 01:36:05,306
Right. But if I turn the switch
and establish contact,
1873
01:36:05,390 --> 01:36:08,268
the bulb will draw power from
the powerhouse down at the dam
1874
01:36:08,351 --> 01:36:11,312
and it'll do what it was meant
to do, which is to make light.
1875
01:36:11,396 --> 01:36:14,899
All right, so you're saying that
people have a sort of powerhouse too.
1876
01:36:14,983 --> 01:36:17,048
Right. And when you establish
contact with that,
1877
01:36:17,068 --> 01:36:18,675
you can do what you're meant to do.
1878
01:36:18,695 --> 01:36:20,697
You can fulfill your destiny.
1879
01:36:21,573 --> 01:36:25,076
The knowledge that this man,
this beautiful, handsome man
1880
01:36:25,118 --> 01:36:28,079
that everyone had loved, had AIDS,
1881
01:36:28,163 --> 01:36:29,914
changed things completely.
1882
01:36:29,998 --> 01:36:33,001
It's when I approached him
about coming out, uh,
1883
01:36:33,084 --> 01:36:35,628
six or seven years earlier,
1884
01:36:35,712 --> 01:36:39,924
I said, "You'll make a difference in
how people perceive gay people."
1885
01:36:41,384 --> 01:36:44,304
Well, goodbye, and thanks for everything.
1886
01:36:53,730 --> 01:36:56,816
Actor Rock Hudson died today at age 59
1887
01:36:56,900 --> 01:36:59,361
after a year's struggle
against AIDS disease.
1888
01:36:59,444 --> 01:37:02,030
His staff said he passed away
peacefully in his sleep
1889
01:37:02,113 --> 01:37:04,282
at his home in Beverly Hills.
1890
01:37:05,283 --> 01:37:06,451
So he's dead.
1891
01:37:06,493 --> 01:37:08,953
Yes, we tried everything.
1892
01:37:15,126 --> 01:37:17,629
It's just a very sad day.
1893
01:37:17,712 --> 01:37:20,632
Don't be afraid.
1894
01:37:21,257 --> 01:37:23,885
Think of life as a shadowy place,
1895
01:37:23,968 --> 01:37:27,055
crowded with people who
can't see each other very well.
1896
01:37:27,138 --> 01:37:29,412
Don't block this. Get
outta here. Get outta here.
1897
01:37:29,432 --> 01:37:31,289
Get outta here.
What kind of people are you?
1898
01:37:31,309 --> 01:37:33,228
Don't you have family that you love?
1899
01:37:33,311 --> 01:37:35,627
Would you like this to happen
to them or to you? Get outta here.
1900
01:37:35,647 --> 01:37:38,983
Think also of a door, just beyond.
1901
01:37:40,568 --> 01:37:42,362
When that door opens...
1902
01:37:43,738 --> 01:37:45,031
we pass through
1903
01:37:45,115 --> 01:37:48,201
into a wonderful brightness.
1904
01:37:49,202 --> 01:37:50,662
When did he go, roughly?
1905
01:37:50,704 --> 01:37:51,904
Early this morning.
1906
01:37:51,955 --> 01:37:53,665
I'd say about 8:30,
9 o'clock.
1907
01:37:53,748 --> 01:37:55,834
I've gotta go.
Please let me go.
1908
01:37:55,917 --> 01:37:59,004
Just a gentle step
from darkness to light.
1909
01:38:00,088 --> 01:38:03,008
From darkness to light.
1910
01:38:04,634 --> 01:38:08,471
Have you anything to say for the fans?
1911
01:38:08,513 --> 01:38:11,558
Just that he was the best
friend I ever had in the world
1912
01:38:11,641 --> 01:38:14,602
and we sort of grew up
in this business together.
1913
01:38:15,478 --> 01:38:16,855
He... I can't.
1914
01:38:16,896 --> 01:38:18,690
Oh, it's very important, sir.
1915
01:38:23,361 --> 01:38:26,031
And the wind came from the wilderness...
1916
01:38:28,033 --> 01:38:33,955
and it carried me where man
can never reach alone.
1917
01:38:46,885 --> 01:38:48,762
We lost a lot of friends.
1918
01:38:48,845 --> 01:38:51,139
I would say 150,
1919
01:38:51,222 --> 01:38:53,058
200, um, friends.
1920
01:38:53,099 --> 01:38:55,352
It was horrifying.
1921
01:38:55,393 --> 01:38:58,104
Oh, it was terrible.
1922
01:38:59,439 --> 01:39:03,568
All we did do is go
to funerals and fundraisers.
1923
01:39:06,196 --> 01:39:08,073
Government funding of AIDS research
1924
01:39:08,114 --> 01:39:09,824
has increased $70 million
1925
01:39:09,908 --> 01:39:11,993
in the year since Hudson's death
1926
01:39:12,035 --> 01:39:14,829
and private fundraising
for all AIDS organizations
1927
01:39:14,913 --> 01:39:16,706
has tripled.
1928
01:39:19,125 --> 01:39:23,088
His passing was
incredibly profound for me.
1929
01:39:23,129 --> 01:39:25,924
And when I got home to LA,
1930
01:39:25,965 --> 01:39:29,094
I went to the Gay Men's Health Clinic
1931
01:39:29,177 --> 01:39:31,971
and I tested positive.
1932
01:39:33,014 --> 01:39:36,559
I was alone
1933
01:39:36,601 --> 01:39:38,228
and scared
1934
01:39:38,269 --> 01:39:41,106
and didn't know how to process it,
1935
01:39:41,189 --> 01:39:46,027
in 1985 when everybody,
1936
01:39:46,111 --> 01:39:48,363
all of my peers, you know,
1937
01:39:48,446 --> 01:39:51,282
people were passing constantly,
1938
01:39:51,366 --> 01:39:57,747
and of course I felt like
I was going to pass as well.
1939
01:39:57,831 --> 01:40:02,627
But I started to live my life in a way
1940
01:40:02,669 --> 01:40:06,256
that I would say...
1941
01:40:07,966 --> 01:40:11,219
live life as fully as possible.
1942
01:40:11,302 --> 01:40:14,222
And I don't know how
I survived or why I've survived.
1943
01:40:14,305 --> 01:40:16,808
And I keep asking God
every day, you know,
1944
01:40:16,850 --> 01:40:18,101
what do you want me to do?
1945
01:40:18,143 --> 01:40:21,938
What, what is there left
for me to do before I leave?
1946
01:40:21,980 --> 01:40:25,650
And I'm waiting to find out.
1947
01:40:27,652 --> 01:40:30,947
Is there anything you fear
in this life at all?
1948
01:40:30,989 --> 01:40:34,117
Or the next one, I suppose?
1949
01:40:36,202 --> 01:40:38,246
I don't think so.
1950
01:40:41,041 --> 01:40:43,126
I used to, but I don't anymore.
1951
01:40:43,168 --> 01:40:48,173
And it's a very comforting
feeling to not be afraid.
1952
01:40:49,758 --> 01:40:52,302
He died the death of a hero
1953
01:40:52,344 --> 01:40:55,055
and he deserves our tears.
1954
01:40:56,014 --> 01:40:59,684
So throw the dirt gently into his grave.
1955
01:41:01,603 --> 01:41:03,271
Take off your hat,
1956
01:41:04,189 --> 01:41:05,815
bow your head...
1957
01:41:07,108 --> 01:41:10,695
and read kindly his epitaph.
1958
01:41:14,574 --> 01:41:18,161
He was seen as the All-American boy.
1959
01:41:18,203 --> 01:41:19,893
When the All-American boy gets AIDS,
1960
01:41:19,913 --> 01:41:22,665
it's really changed
a lot of people's attitudes.
1961
01:41:22,707 --> 01:41:25,794
When he died, longtime
friend Elizabeth Taylor prayed
1962
01:41:25,877 --> 01:41:28,171
that he had not died in vain.
1963
01:41:28,713 --> 01:41:32,258
Art lives on forever.
1964
01:41:32,342 --> 01:41:36,096
Unless we find a cure for AIDS,
1965
01:41:36,179 --> 01:41:39,766
there will be no forever.
1966
01:41:39,849 --> 01:41:41,393
And we will find it.
1967
01:41:41,476 --> 01:41:44,145
We will find it together.
1968
01:41:46,064 --> 01:41:48,900
He pretty much did change the
course of history around AIDS.
1969
01:41:48,942 --> 01:41:50,652
He didn't intentionally do it,
1970
01:41:50,735 --> 01:41:55,115
but there was no other star that
made that kind of impact before.
1971
01:41:55,198 --> 01:41:57,742
There hasn't been one since, really.
1972
01:42:00,078 --> 01:42:04,624
It is beyond your power
to change the face of destiny.
1973
01:42:04,708 --> 01:42:07,711
Outside this place, there's a great evil.
1974
01:42:07,752 --> 01:42:11,756
Men speak of hatred
and sharpen the knives.
1975
01:42:11,840 --> 01:42:14,384
I will make you well
1976
01:42:14,426 --> 01:42:18,221
and perhaps your life
will find a new sweetness.
1977
01:42:20,015 --> 01:42:23,977
You don't have to prove anything anymore.
1978
01:42:24,060 --> 01:42:28,189
You are accepted.
1979
01:42:28,273 --> 01:42:32,986
You will be in your own new dimension.
1980
01:42:35,447 --> 01:42:39,034
You'll have to go on asking yourself,
1981
01:42:39,117 --> 01:42:40,869
what's your dream?
1982
01:42:42,746 --> 01:42:44,873
What's your dream today?
1983
01:42:48,376 --> 01:42:50,211
There's an old saying:
1984
01:42:50,295 --> 01:42:53,423
"Nobody really dies
till he's forgotten."
1985
01:43:06,728 --> 01:43:09,898
♪ Barry McGuire
playing "So Long, Stay Well" ♪
1986
01:43:13,943 --> 01:43:17,989
♪ Little boy, go ride
the pale horse in the park ♪
1987
01:43:18,073 --> 01:43:19,550
♪ Count
the golden butterflies ♪
1988
01:43:19,574 --> 01:43:21,409
♪ Stay out till dark ♪
1989
01:43:21,493 --> 01:43:25,163
♪ Never mind the grownups
who sing their old song ♪
1990
01:43:25,246 --> 01:43:26,998
♪ So long ♪
1991
01:43:27,040 --> 01:43:29,292
♪ Stay well ♪
1992
01:43:29,334 --> 01:43:32,337
♪ Love was here ♪
1993
01:43:32,379 --> 01:43:36,007
♪ And gone ♪
1994
01:43:36,091 --> 01:43:39,928
♪ Little boy, you're older,
keep life while you can ♪
1995
01:43:40,011 --> 01:43:43,848
♪ Happy days and holidays
so soon escape man ♪
1996
01:43:43,890 --> 01:43:47,352
♪ Soon you'll be a grownup
and sing your own song ♪
1997
01:43:47,394 --> 01:43:49,312
♪ So long ♪
1998
01:43:49,354 --> 01:43:51,272
♪ Stay well ♪
1999
01:43:51,356 --> 01:43:54,818
♪ Love was here ♪
2000
01:43:54,859 --> 01:43:58,029
♪ And gone ♪
2001
01:43:58,071 --> 01:44:02,450
♪ Some other autumn
will right all the wrongs ♪
2002
01:44:02,534 --> 01:44:05,912
♪ So long ♪
2003
01:44:05,995 --> 01:44:09,958
♪ Stay well ♪
2004
01:44:10,041 --> 01:44:13,336
♪ Love was here ♪
2005
01:44:13,378 --> 01:44:15,213
♪ And gone ♪
153595
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