Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated:
1
00:00:04,136 --> 00:00:05,697
Ah, Christmas.
2
00:00:05,760 --> 00:00:07,897
It's a regular feast
for the senses.
3
00:00:08,000 --> 00:00:11,000
The smells, the sights,
the sounds...
4
00:00:11,113 --> 00:00:13,879
If that's those
charity wrapping paper kids again,
5
00:00:13,968 --> 00:00:16,560
they already hit us twice. They
keep changing hats and scarves,
6
00:00:16,697 --> 00:00:18,672
but I recognize 'em.
It's my parents.
7
00:00:18,777 --> 00:00:21,521
Guys!
Grandma and grandpa are here!
8
00:00:21,631 --> 00:00:22,929
What? Now?
9
00:00:23,009 --> 00:00:24,520
I thought they weren't coming
till Christmas.
10
00:00:24,601 --> 00:00:26,497
Mike, don't look surprised.
I told you about this.
11
00:00:26,576 --> 00:00:28,520
That was my mom.
12
00:00:28,592 --> 00:00:30,424
My parents are coming
a week early for Christmas.
13
00:00:30,553 --> 00:00:33,449
They'll be staying for 12 days.
That's cool with you, right?
14
00:00:33,545 --> 00:00:35,113
Yes, yes, yes, yes!
15
00:00:37,153 --> 00:00:39,128
You purposely told me
during a Colts game.
16
00:00:39,256 --> 00:00:41,632
All I know is that I heard "yes."
17
00:00:41,713 --> 00:00:43,528
Frankie, 12 days?
18
00:00:43,656 --> 00:00:45,601
Mike, I gotta let 'em in.
19
00:00:45,696 --> 00:00:47,561
Yeah, and you can,
in eight days.
20
00:00:47,672 --> 00:00:48,913
Christmas is about family...
21
00:00:48,992 --> 00:00:51,016
Family that's outside right now
getting very suspicious.
22
00:00:51,105 --> 00:00:53,952
Just relax. It's gonna be fun.
12 days?
23
00:00:54,065 --> 00:01:00,225
12 days is too long, Frankie.Nobody's fun
for 12... (Both) Merry Christmas!
24
00:01:03,225 --> 00:01:07,226
There's my big, gorgeous son-in-law!
Mwah! How are ya?
25
00:01:07,304 --> 00:01:08,320
Are we late?
26
00:01:08,417 --> 00:01:11,385
No, no. Uh, you're even earlier
than I expected.
27
00:01:11,464 --> 00:01:14,984
Oh, baby!
Hey! There they are!
28
00:01:15,065 --> 00:01:18,449
Hi, Suzy Q! Oh, look at you. Look at you.
Oh! You've grown. You've grown.
29
00:01:18,568 --> 00:01:22,913
I brought... Fudge.
30
00:01:23,049 --> 00:01:24,377
Awesome!
Thanks, grandma!
31
00:01:24,464 --> 00:01:26,856
Okay, guys, just a couple.
Oh, Frankie.
32
00:01:26,977 --> 00:01:29,552
It's fudge. It's Christmas.
33
00:01:29,633 --> 00:01:31,833
Oh, mom gets out-mommed
by grandma.
34
00:01:31,912 --> 00:01:33,625
Merry Christmas to me.
35
00:01:33,736 --> 00:01:36,745
Hey! Anybody notice
I grew antlers?
36
00:01:36,824 --> 00:01:40,464
I thought they'd be great
for the family skit this year.
37
00:01:40,561 --> 00:01:43,984
Got some for you, too.
Dad, you're finally doing the skit with us?
38
00:01:44,088 --> 00:01:47,289
Oh, don't worry, Sue.
We're gonna get him this year.
39
00:01:47,384 --> 00:01:50,320
Yeah, we've got 12 whole days
to work on ya.
40
00:01:50,417 --> 00:01:53,440
Oh-ho! Hey. Who's countin'?
41
00:01:55,704 --> 00:01:58,457
12 days, and he's already on me
about the skit.
42
00:01:58,568 --> 00:02:00,832
What kind of screwy family
has to do a skit
43
00:02:00,929 --> 00:02:03,849
in the family room every Christmas?
It just feels alien to you
44
00:02:03,952 --> 00:02:07,016
because your family's
not fun. We're fun.
45
00:02:07,113 --> 00:02:10,200
And you're a bunch of
walking corpses who drink.
46
00:02:10,305 --> 00:02:11,338
That's what I'm talking about.
47
00:02:11,416 --> 00:02:13,120
You know,
look at it this way...
48
00:02:13,200 --> 00:02:15,473
After tonight,
there's only 11 more days.
49
00:02:15,601 --> 00:02:17,872
Oh, no.
50
00:02:17,952 --> 00:02:20,097
I only have 11 days
until Christmas?
51
00:02:20,169 --> 00:02:22,824
I still have to shop for
presents and find the stockings
52
00:02:22,936 --> 00:02:25,120
and finish the tree.
Oh, my God!
53
00:02:25,225 --> 00:02:28,401
Oh, and if you go out, I need
a present this big for Sue.
54
00:02:28,496 --> 00:02:30,248
What are you looking for?
It doesn't matter.
55
00:02:30,321 --> 00:02:32,584
I got Axl and Brick something
this big, and it has to take up
56
00:02:32,681 --> 00:02:34,544
the same amount of floor space
so it doesn't look
57
00:02:34,665 --> 00:02:35,649
like we have favorites.
58
00:02:37,160 --> 00:02:38,521
Hey. How's this?
59
00:02:39,769 --> 00:02:40,881
Oh, are you kidding?
60
00:02:40,977 --> 00:02:43,753
We got this stupid shower radio
for Axl last Christmas,
61
00:02:43,848 --> 00:02:45,576
and look.
He didn't even open it.
62
00:02:45,688 --> 00:02:47,369
Good. We'll give it to him
again. He won't remember.
63
00:02:47,473 --> 00:02:48,480
And this...
64
00:02:48,568 --> 00:02:50,656
I spent $20 for rush delivery
65
00:02:50,712 --> 00:02:51,968
so the kids could open it
Christmas morning
66
00:02:52,192 --> 00:02:56,208
only to have them dump it down here
Christmas night. Ugh. You ow what?
67
00:02:56,281 --> 00:02:58,600
Don't even tell me those things.
It makes me kind of mad. Me, too.
68
00:02:58,793 --> 00:03:01,056
I mean, I drive myself nuts
running around
69
00:03:01,136 --> 00:03:02,617
buyin' all this stuff for them,
70
00:03:02,689 --> 00:03:05,585
and for what, Mike? Really, for what?
Didn't you say you were looking for stockings?
71
00:03:05,672 --> 00:03:07,944
Yeah. Ahh.
Here they are, in the Easter box.
72
00:03:08,048 --> 00:03:10,113
What the hell is that?
73
00:03:12,377 --> 00:03:13,592
It's the orange...
74
00:03:13,697 --> 00:03:16,728
The orange I put in their
stocking every year, you know?
75
00:03:16,833 --> 00:03:19,472
'Cause during the depression,
the only thing that my grandma
76
00:03:19,586 --> 00:03:21,761
got in her stocking
was an orange,
77
00:03:21,856 --> 00:03:23,962
but she loved it
and it was enough.
78
00:03:24,048 --> 00:03:26,024
And that's why my mom put it
in my stocking,
79
00:03:26,144 --> 00:03:27,433
we put one in our kids',
80
00:03:27,568 --> 00:03:29,745
'cause I never want them
to forget to appreciate
81
00:03:29,840 --> 00:03:33,248
something as pure and simple
as an orange.
82
00:03:33,384 --> 00:03:35,744
Look, you're always complaining
about how hard Christmas is?
83
00:03:35,857 --> 00:03:39,064
What if we found a way to... to find
the true meaning of Christmas again?
84
00:03:39,192 --> 00:03:41,057
I-I was thinking
spend less money.
85
00:03:41,192 --> 00:03:42,337
But that'd work, too.
86
00:03:42,545 --> 00:03:44,952
87
00:03:45,232 --> 00:03:47,056
Listen, dad and I want to
talk to you about something.
88
00:03:47,209 --> 00:03:50,009
Mm. This can't be good.
Relax.
89
00:03:50,136 --> 00:03:51,464
We're doing a little
thinking about Christmas.
90
00:03:51,569 --> 00:03:53,609
It seems that we don't always
appreciate it the way we should.
91
00:03:53,696 --> 00:03:56,920
Oh, no, we appreciate it.
Mm, we totally appreciate it.
92
00:03:57,016 --> 00:03:58,096
Do you?
93
00:04:00,184 --> 00:04:01,256
Exhibit "a."
94
00:04:02,209 --> 00:04:05,088
Does anybody recognize that?
We'll give you a hint.
95
00:04:05,249 --> 00:04:07,360
One of you had to have it
just last .
96
00:04:07,476 --> 00:04:10,480
Well... it's lame,
so I'll go with Sue.
97
00:04:10,585 --> 00:04:13,272
Ooh! Sorry. We were looking
for "Axl."
98
00:04:13,392 --> 00:04:15,585
The correct answer
is "Axl."
99
00:04:15,712 --> 00:04:19,265
And it's not even opened.
Wow. That is unappreciative.
100
00:04:19,368 --> 00:04:22,001
Huh. That's funny
you should say that, Sue.
101
00:04:22,112 --> 00:04:22,856
Or should I say...
102
00:04:22,961 --> 00:04:24,920
Exhibit "b."
103
00:04:25,072 --> 00:04:28,856
Oh! Thank you!
I've been looking for this.
104
00:04:28,969 --> 00:04:30,217
Been in the middle
of the pool table all year,
105
00:04:30,304 --> 00:04:31,768
right next to...
106
00:04:31,897 --> 00:04:33,864
Exhibit "c"!
107
00:04:34,704 --> 00:04:37,073
A word-a-day calendar?
Well, you know that's not mine.
108
00:04:37,176 --> 00:04:39,664
Brick stopped using it
on January 2nd.
109
00:04:39,785 --> 00:04:42,152
"And coincidentally,
the word is irresponsible."
110
00:04:42,264 --> 00:04:44,362
This is why
your dad and I have decided
111
00:04:44,464 --> 00:04:46,264
to simplify things this year.
112
00:04:46,377 --> 00:04:47,816
What?
113
00:04:47,904 --> 00:04:49,161
Okay.
114
00:04:50,418 --> 00:04:51,249
Guys...
115
00:04:51,353 --> 00:04:54,776
I just feel like we've lost
the meaning of Christmas.
116
00:04:54,864 --> 00:04:56,112
Now grandma and grandpa
are here.
117
00:04:56,216 --> 00:04:58,706
We have 11 more days.
Wouldn't it be great if we,
118
00:04:58,817 --> 00:05:02,528
as a family, could rethink
just doing what we always do
119
00:05:02,625 --> 00:05:05,432
and find a way to reclaim
Christmas... the good parts?
120
00:05:05,528 --> 00:05:07,834
To truly experience the orange.
121
00:05:07,920 --> 00:05:10,256
Oh, my God!
122
00:05:10,392 --> 00:05:11,713
They're not
getting us presents!
123
00:05:11,825 --> 00:05:13,528
What's the orange again?
124
00:05:13,641 --> 00:05:15,449
Is that true? Are you weenying
out on getting us presents?
125
00:05:15,561 --> 00:05:17,488
Calm down. Nobody's weenying
out of anything.
126
00:05:17,648 --> 00:05:20,708
There'll be presents, just maybe not so many.
All 'cause of an orange?
127
00:05:20,941 --> 00:05:23,653
What's the orange? You remember.
From our stockings.
128
00:05:23,748 --> 00:05:25,580
That stupid orange from when
mom used to live on the prairie
129
00:05:25,677 --> 00:05:28,804
and all she got for Christmas was an orange.
Uh, it wasn't frontier days,
130
00:05:28,901 --> 00:05:31,365
it's your great-grandmother
during the depression.
131
00:05:31,485 --> 00:05:34,429
- How old do you think I am? - God,
I don't know. I try not to think about you.
132
00:05:34,524 --> 00:05:38,068
Aah! Axl be quiet, and please
let our pretty young mother
133
00:05:38,132 --> 00:05:40,020
finish telling us
about the presents.
134
00:05:40,124 --> 00:05:41,292
Well, we thought
instead of going crazy
135
00:05:41,372 --> 00:05:42,676
buying piles of crap,
136
00:05:42,781 --> 00:05:44,428
we could give you just
a couple special things
137
00:05:44,525 --> 00:05:46,261
that would really mean
something to you.
138
00:05:46,429 --> 00:05:48,524
Yeah, and if you wanna get
something for each other
139
00:05:48,596 --> 00:05:50,853
or your friends,
you can earn the money.
140
00:05:50,949 --> 00:05:54,228
Or make something homemade,
from the heart.
141
00:05:54,429 --> 00:05:57,237
From the... heart? Where is this
coming from? It's Christmas!
142
00:05:57,357 --> 00:05:59,197
Maybe it wouldn't be so bad...
143
00:05:59,268 --> 00:06:01,749
Thinking of something special
we really want?
144
00:06:01,870 --> 00:06:02,782
Traitor!
Sue!
145
00:06:02,892 --> 00:06:04,380
It's kind of a nice thought.
146
00:06:04,485 --> 00:06:07,084
I know one thing
I would really like
147
00:06:07,198 --> 00:06:08,644
is a new diary.
148
00:06:10,853 --> 00:06:13,221
Oh, my God!
How did you know?
149
00:06:13,325 --> 00:06:15,812
We found it under a sweater
on Brick's train set.
150
00:06:15,990 --> 00:06:17,197
It's exhibit "d."
151
00:06:20,668 --> 00:06:21,788
Well, once they got used
to the idea,
152
00:06:21,916 --> 00:06:24,077
the "simple Christmas" thing
really took off.
153
00:06:24,220 --> 00:06:26,197
I had time to bake cookies
with my mom,
154
00:06:26,357 --> 00:06:28,477
and since Sue wanted to
buy gifts for everyone,
155
00:06:28,580 --> 00:06:32,413
she went out the next day and
got herself a job.
156
00:06:33,180 --> 00:06:34,372
Hey!
Sorry!
157
00:06:34,494 --> 00:06:36,653
Even Axl surprised us
and got into the spirit.
158
00:06:36,764 --> 00:06:39,150
So, since we're doing this
lame-o simple thing,
159
00:06:39,269 --> 00:06:41,822
and there's no way I'm
spending my own money on you,
160
00:06:41,932 --> 00:06:45,109
I'm giving you the most awesome
gift of all... the gift of me.
161
00:06:45,246 --> 00:06:47,772
Oh, but no hugging, no touching,
no contact of any kind,
162
00:06:47,861 --> 00:06:49,372
and you've gotta decide within
the next three seconds
163
00:06:49,461 --> 00:06:51,396
or the offer's void.
164
00:06:55,285 --> 00:06:56,173
What?
165
00:06:58,684 --> 00:07:00,140
I want you
to build me an igloo.
166
00:07:00,300 --> 00:07:02,534
Oh, whew. I thought you
were gonna... make me read.
167
00:07:02,668 --> 00:07:05,397
Yep, the simple Christmas
was bringing people together,
168
00:07:05,493 --> 00:07:08,468
even more together than
some people would have hoped.
169
00:07:08,596 --> 00:07:10,069
Heh! There you are!
170
00:07:10,260 --> 00:07:13,061
Hey, did I ever tell you
about my neighbor, Stan?
171
00:07:13,189 --> 00:07:16,405
Found a tumor behind his eyeball
big as a grapefruit.
172
00:07:16,534 --> 00:07:17,724
Big as a grapefruit.
173
00:07:17,821 --> 00:07:19,661
There you are!
174
00:07:21,245 --> 00:07:22,548
Oh, me, too.
I love the quiet.
175
00:07:22,669 --> 00:07:27,253
My favorite part
of being quiet is when
176
00:07:27,366 --> 00:07:28,454
two people get together...
177
00:07:28,580 --> 00:07:29,924
Hey! There you are!
178
00:07:30,052 --> 00:07:32,580
What's that,
snow you're shoveling there?
179
00:07:32,677 --> 00:07:35,420
You know, I knew three guys
died shoveling snow?
180
00:07:35,540 --> 00:07:40,668
Follow me in merry measure
181
00:07:42,159 --> 00:07:44,032
So, what do you think, huh?
182
00:07:44,134 --> 00:07:46,006
I thought we were doing
a second story.
183
00:07:47,776 --> 00:07:49,495
Where's the reading nook?
184
00:07:49,927 --> 00:07:53,527
I was hoping it'd be next to the hearth.
A hearth? Oh, my God.
185
00:07:53,647 --> 00:07:55,087
This is, like, the first thing
I've actually finished
186
00:07:55,191 --> 00:07:57,167
in my entire life, and you
don't even appreciate it?
187
00:07:57,302 --> 00:07:59,967
Not very orange-y of you,
is it, Brick?
188
00:08:00,095 --> 00:08:01,550
I'm gonna go inside
and get something to eat.
189
00:08:01,695 --> 00:08:04,752
If you built the kitchen
I asked for,
190
00:08:04,887 --> 00:08:06,312
you wouldn't have to go in.
191
00:08:12,599 --> 00:08:14,246
Hey, hey, hey, hey.
Axl, what are you doing?
192
00:08:14,335 --> 00:08:16,503
You're getting the floor all wet.
Are you on me, too? 'Cause I'm not
193
00:08:16,607 --> 00:08:18,992
a professional igloo builder.
I'm doing my best. Clean up your mess.
194
00:08:19,102 --> 00:08:22,400
It's just a little snow.
He's a teenager.
195
00:08:22,502 --> 00:08:23,576
That's what they do.
196
00:08:23,686 --> 00:08:26,200
Uh, what was that?
What was what?
197
00:08:26,294 --> 00:08:28,479
This. You waved me off.
198
00:08:28,648 --> 00:08:32,758
Don't be ridiculous, I did not.
Aah! There! You're doing it again!
199
00:08:32,888 --> 00:08:35,631
I'm his mom, and I need him
to clean up his mess.
200
00:08:35,807 --> 00:08:37,166
Okay, fine.
201
00:08:37,280 --> 00:08:41,286
Axl, listen to your mom
and clean up your mess.
202
00:08:42,735 --> 00:08:43,951
I saw that.
203
00:08:44,135 --> 00:08:46,360
What?
You winked. You just winked.
204
00:08:46,454 --> 00:08:48,935
Wh... there was something
in my eye.
205
00:08:49,047 --> 00:08:50,455
No, this is something
in your eye.
206
00:08:50,543 --> 00:08:52,823
This is a wink.
207
00:08:53,414 --> 00:08:54,608
I know what a wink is.
It means,
208
00:08:54,703 --> 00:08:58,015
"don't listen to your mom.
She's crazy." (Gasps) It does not.
209
00:08:58,127 --> 00:09:00,816
Oh, yes, it does. Janet and I
do it about you all the time.
210
00:09:06,816 --> 00:09:10,183
Just wipe up the floor, Axl,
before you leave the kitchen.
211
00:09:10,375 --> 00:09:12,215
You heard your mother.
212
00:09:16,031 --> 00:09:17,847
I'm already up.
I'll just do it.
213
00:09:18,659 --> 00:09:20,535
For seven days,
Mike put up with my dad.
214
00:09:20,758 --> 00:09:23,159
But on the eighth day,
he hid.
215
00:09:33,463 --> 00:09:34,623
There you are!
216
00:09:34,999 --> 00:09:36,134
Yeah! Just checkin' out
217
00:09:36,279 --> 00:09:38,398
the hot water heater.
It's been actin' funny.
218
00:09:38,575 --> 00:09:41,141
Maybe I can help you out.
Hey, did I ever tell you about
219
00:09:41,213 --> 00:09:43,845
the time I met the weatherman,
Storm McMartin?
220
00:09:43,991 --> 00:09:47,054
I mean, he was just walking along the
street like nothing... Oh! Hey, look at...
221
00:09:47,142 --> 00:09:49,399
Here it is. Yep.
That's the problem.
222
00:09:49,486 --> 00:09:51,478
Better go to the hardware store,
get another one of these.
223
00:09:51,582 --> 00:09:54,126
I'd ask you along, but...
Sure, I'll keep you company.
224
00:09:55,718 --> 00:09:58,350
Okay, kids.
What's up, grandma?
225
00:09:58,455 --> 00:10:01,301
Well, your grandpa and I were
chatting on the way down here,
226
00:10:01,430 --> 00:10:04,894
and we thought that we would
give you all a little something
227
00:10:04,959 --> 00:10:07,430
extra...
228
00:10:07,535 --> 00:10:09,399
It's not your Christmas.
229
00:10:09,494 --> 00:10:11,839
It's just... for...
230
00:10:11,941 --> 00:10:13,255
A-fun.
231
00:10:13,630 --> 00:10:15,999
$100! Oh, my God!
232
00:10:16,111 --> 00:10:17,814
Aah!
Grandma, you're the best!
233
00:10:17,903 --> 00:10:20,879
My first Benjamin!
234
00:10:21,013 --> 00:10:23,262
Mom, that's an awful lot
of money.
235
00:10:23,398 --> 00:10:26,071
Oh, well, we can't
take it with us, right?
236
00:10:26,190 --> 00:10:27,335
Whoo-hoo!
237
00:10:27,430 --> 00:10:31,358
I am done spinning arrows. I'm rich!
Wait, wait, guys. Hang on.
238
00:10:31,430 --> 00:10:33,999
Sue, you're making your own
money. Doesn't that feel good?
239
00:10:34,110 --> 00:10:36,319
And, Brick, you were excited
about those coupons
240
00:10:36,407 --> 00:10:38,079
you were making for us.
Let's be honest.
241
00:10:38,182 --> 00:10:40,182
I was never really gonna
honor 'em, anyway.
242
00:10:41,911 --> 00:10:43,247
Mom...
Hmm?
243
00:10:43,367 --> 00:10:47,031
Listen, you didn't know this,
but Mike and I decided
244
00:10:47,087 --> 00:10:48,999
to do a more simple Christmas
this year...
245
00:10:49,151 --> 00:10:50,974
You know, not about stuff
and things, but more about
246
00:10:51,071 --> 00:10:55,622
family and being together. Oh.
I'm sorry. I... I-I didn't know.
247
00:10:55,774 --> 00:10:58,944
Okay, kids! Your mom wants you
to give the money back.
248
00:10:59,072 --> 00:11:02,129
What? Mom! No!
No, mom, I'm not giving this back!
249
00:11:02,241 --> 00:11:04,426
Mom, you can't do this to us!
Come on. You heard her. No money.
250
00:11:04,505 --> 00:11:07,664
No, no, no, no, no. You don't
have to give the money back.
251
00:11:07,809 --> 00:11:09,904
Why don't I put it
in your bank accounts,
252
00:11:10,010 --> 00:11:11,842
where it'll make a nice
half a percent?
253
00:11:12,002 --> 00:11:13,274
Ugh.
254
00:11:14,729 --> 00:11:18,072
Deck the halls
with boughs of holly
255
00:11:18,193 --> 00:11:21,281
da da-da da-da,
da-da da-da
256
00:11:21,576 --> 00:11:24,202
Ah, it feels good to sing.
Not do the skit, tag.
257
00:11:24,354 --> 00:11:25,562
Should we ask for help?
258
00:11:25,689 --> 00:11:29,978
You know what we could do? We could split up.
Excuse me, there... uh... Kevin. Hey, listen,
259
00:11:30,072 --> 00:11:31,977
would you help my son-in-law
out here?
260
00:11:32,065 --> 00:11:36,736
Don't be afraid
to ask for help.
261
00:11:36,834 --> 00:11:38,425
My friend, Cecil Maynard,
262
00:11:38,488 --> 00:11:41,210
wouldn't ask for help... guess
what happened to him? Choking.
263
00:11:41,354 --> 00:11:43,993
Bam! Face first, right in his soup.
264
00:11:44,145 --> 00:11:46,921
Help me, Kevin. Whoa. Never seen one
break like that through normal use.
265
00:11:47,024 --> 00:11:49,418
Unfortunately, we don't have
this part in stock right now,
266
00:11:49,466 --> 00:11:51,817
and we're not gonna get it in
until after the holidays.
267
00:11:51,938 --> 00:11:53,713
Sorry. You're looking at
some cold showers.
268
00:11:53,842 --> 00:11:56,970
I love a cold shower.
You know what? Well...
269
00:11:57,098 --> 00:12:00,065
Fa-la-la, la-la-la,
la-la-la
270
00:12:00,217 --> 00:12:01,850
He just keeps talking, Frankie.
271
00:12:01,945 --> 00:12:03,346
You know how I feel
about talking.
272
00:12:03,434 --> 00:12:05,961
And he won't give up
on that skit.
273
00:12:06,058 --> 00:12:08,169
You really should the skit.
What are you doing?
274
00:12:08,226 --> 00:12:10,497
Oh, Brick ate too much fudge.
275
00:12:10,593 --> 00:12:13,240
The poor kid just crawled behind
the chair like a cat and barfed.
276
00:12:13,345 --> 00:12:15,890
I told my mom to ease up on
the fudge. She wouldn't listen.
277
00:12:16,019 --> 00:12:18,225
Aha! She's gettin' to ya!
278
00:12:18,354 --> 00:12:20,506
12 days startin' to feel
a little long, Frankie?
279
00:12:20,601 --> 00:12:24,593
For your information, this is
the best Christmas of my life.
280
00:12:24,713 --> 00:12:27,816
Ugh!
How much fudge did he eat?
281
00:12:27,977 --> 00:12:30,904
Whatcha got there?
282
00:12:34,240 --> 00:12:35,161
Nothing.
283
00:12:35,258 --> 00:12:38,033
Really? It looks like an igloo.
Does it?
284
00:12:38,129 --> 00:12:40,690
Oh, yeah. Sort of. I-I guess.
285
00:12:43,345 --> 00:12:45,057
Axl! Glossners!
286
00:12:45,240 --> 00:12:46,170
Wh-what happened?
287
00:12:46,273 --> 00:12:48,018
They looked at the igloo
and smiled!
288
00:12:48,090 --> 00:12:50,073
Dude, you left it alone? They're
gonna try and destroy it!
289
00:12:50,169 --> 00:12:52,426
Get a rope, tennis racket,
shovel, bicycle chain,
290
00:12:52,521 --> 00:12:54,811
and a frying pan!
It's all in there!
291
00:12:54,914 --> 00:12:58,601
Good news. Found a replacement
part in Terra Haute.
292
00:12:58,682 --> 00:12:59,922
Tag's on his power walk.
293
00:13:00,017 --> 00:13:01,833
If you wait till he gets back,
he can go with you.
294
00:13:03,793 --> 00:13:05,897
Can't. Store's closing.
Gotta go.
295
00:13:09,032 --> 00:13:10,904
Hi, dad. We're gonna kill
the glossners.
296
00:13:11,010 --> 00:13:11,824
Okay! Have fun!
297
00:13:14,889 --> 00:13:15,568
Ahh.
298
00:13:18,082 --> 00:13:19,185
Oh, come on.
299
00:13:28,825 --> 00:13:30,944
Uhh!
300
00:13:34,009 --> 00:13:34,625
Come on!
301
00:13:40,466 --> 00:13:41,777
Come on!
302
00:13:47,209 --> 00:13:48,360
There you are!
Aah!
303
00:13:48,466 --> 00:13:52,041
(Laughs) Whew.
Thought you were gonna leave without me.
304
00:13:52,185 --> 00:13:53,753
So did I.
305
00:13:59,026 --> 00:14:00,674
It was the night before Christmas,
306
00:14:00,827 --> 00:14:03,650
and mom was in her kerchief,
and I was in my cap,
307
00:14:03,739 --> 00:14:05,435
and the kids were in the igloo
308
00:14:05,523 --> 00:14:07,355
trying to figure out
how to kill the glossners.
309
00:14:07,771 --> 00:14:08,867
Glossners are hiding
in the bushes.
310
00:14:08,987 --> 00:14:11,907
I saw them when grandma took
fudge over to the Donahues.
311
00:14:12,050 --> 00:14:16,546
I used her as a human shield. I'm cold.
I told you we needed a fireplace.
312
00:14:16,666 --> 00:14:18,402
You can't put a fireplace
in an igloo!
313
00:14:18,475 --> 00:14:20,387
The eskimos do it all the time.
314
00:14:20,475 --> 00:14:22,595
Oh, my God, Brick.
Eskimos aren't even real.
315
00:14:22,674 --> 00:14:24,794
They're just in stories
like leprechauns and trolls.
316
00:14:24,882 --> 00:14:27,402
Would you two stop fighting?
Look at us.
317
00:14:27,499 --> 00:14:29,089
We're fighting with each other.
318
00:14:29,187 --> 00:14:30,683
We're fighting
with our neighbors.
319
00:14:30,787 --> 00:14:34,371
Christmas is supposed to be
a time of peace and joy,
320
00:14:34,466 --> 00:14:38,147
good will toward men...
Even Glossners.
321
00:14:38,243 --> 00:14:40,338
Somebody has to make
the first gesture.
322
00:14:40,435 --> 00:14:42,506
I'm going out there!
323
00:14:43,395 --> 00:14:45,129
What are you doing?
Don't, Sue, no!
324
00:14:50,523 --> 00:14:52,858
Lu lu lu lu
325
00:14:52,962 --> 00:14:53,834
lu...
326
00:15:02,626 --> 00:15:04,130
After Sue crawled to safety
under the car,
327
00:15:04,242 --> 00:15:06,411
I called a truce
and sent the Glossners home
328
00:15:06,515 --> 00:15:07,779
and my kids to bed.
329
00:15:07,915 --> 00:15:11,435
After all, it was the eve
of our first simple Christmas,
330
00:15:11,555 --> 00:15:12,987
and it was perfect.
331
00:15:13,427 --> 00:15:15,746
We did it.
We didn't go overboard.
332
00:15:15,899 --> 00:15:17,834
Sue's getting the iPod
she wanted,
333
00:15:17,931 --> 00:15:20,395
Brick's talking globe,
Axl a new amp.
334
00:15:20,499 --> 00:15:23,435
You know what we filled
this house with? Hmm?
335
00:15:23,531 --> 00:15:26,410
Instead of gifts,
we filled it with love.
336
00:15:26,555 --> 00:15:28,179
Does that make you feel good?
337
00:15:28,282 --> 00:15:31,706
Yep. One more day.
338
00:15:32,052 --> 00:15:34,098
Fa-la-la-la,
la-la, la-la
339
00:15:35,219 --> 00:15:37,011
fast away the old year passes,
fa-la-la, la-la, la-la, la-la
340
00:15:38,867 --> 00:15:40,259
What the hell?
341
00:15:40,458 --> 00:15:45,555
No. Those are Santa gifts
Santa? Over there.
342
00:15:45,674 --> 00:15:46,690
I don't know what these are.
343
00:15:49,217 --> 00:15:55,186
From grandma and grandpa.
Can you believe this?
344
00:15:55,305 --> 00:15:56,698
Can you believe that
she would do this?
345
00:15:56,793 --> 00:16:00,202
I told her that we were
doing a simple Christmas!
346
00:16:00,297 --> 00:16:03,553
Okay. Well, she's not
gettin' away with this.
347
00:16:03,706 --> 00:16:06,402
What happened to "be patient"
and "Christmas is about family"?
348
00:16:06,514 --> 00:16:08,897
Oh, screw that.
Look at all these presents!
349
00:16:08,994 --> 00:16:09,898
You know what this is?
350
00:16:09,978 --> 00:16:13,066
This is a big winking
wave-off from my mom.
351
00:16:13,185 --> 00:16:15,914
Yeah, well, I am the mom
in this house,
352
00:16:15,985 --> 00:16:18,234
and what I say goes!
What are you doing?
353
00:16:18,338 --> 00:16:21,227
Gettin' these in the garage
before the kids wake up!
354
00:16:21,284 --> 00:16:23,274
Me on!
Stuff some in a bag.
355
00:16:23,345 --> 00:16:25,034
Ugh.
356
00:16:29,890 --> 00:16:31,872
Mom...
357
00:16:32,233 --> 00:16:35,362
Why are you taking our presents?
Why?
358
00:16:35,506 --> 00:16:37,409
Uh...
359
00:16:38,346 --> 00:16:39,698
See, the thing is, Brick...
360
00:16:39,809 --> 00:16:42,490
Frankie, what on earth
are you doing?
361
00:16:42,609 --> 00:16:45,194
Presents! Sweet!
362
00:16:45,305 --> 00:16:47,409
There's a kazillion
presents over there!
363
00:16:47,545 --> 00:16:49,586
No, no, no! Hey! Hey...
364
00:16:49,673 --> 00:16:51,009
Guys, there's more of them over here!
365
00:16:51,098 --> 00:16:53,394
No...
Take it over there.
366
00:16:53,481 --> 00:16:56,098
Guys, guys! Did anybody look
in their stocking
367
00:16:56,169 --> 00:16:58,754
and find a refreshing treat?
368
00:16:58,906 --> 00:17:02,617
Hey, stop it. Guys, stop!
369
00:17:02,770 --> 00:17:03,546
Stop it!
370
00:17:03,657 --> 00:17:05,754
Frankie, why don't you let 'em
open their presents?
371
00:17:05,842 --> 00:17:09,248
Because I told you we were
doing a simple Christmas!
372
00:17:09,362 --> 00:17:12,474
Well, I didn't think
you meant us, too.
373
00:17:12,585 --> 00:17:15,953
Oh, you knew I meant you, too,
and you ignored me!
374
00:17:16,058 --> 00:17:18,722
You've been winking and waving
at me all over the place
375
00:17:18,818 --> 00:17:21,554
since you got here!
Well, I am sorry, Frankie,
376
00:17:21,633 --> 00:17:24,914
but there is no way I was
participating in that insanity.
377
00:17:25,010 --> 00:17:28,033
A simple Christmas is just
really a lame idea.
378
00:17:28,137 --> 00:17:29,906
I told you not to tell her that.
379
00:17:30,033 --> 00:17:33,698
Well, you don't cut back
at Christmas. It's Christmas!
380
00:17:33,817 --> 00:17:35,930
Who are you people?
381
00:17:36,114 --> 00:17:36,889
When I was a kid,
382
00:17:37,003 --> 00:17:40,577
for my allowance, I got one cent
for every year of my life.
383
00:17:40,658 --> 00:17:44,169
That means when I was 12,
I got 12 pennies, mom.
384
00:17:44,298 --> 00:17:45,274
12 pennies!
385
00:17:45,377 --> 00:17:48,178
Well, back then, we were
parents. Now we're grandparents.
386
00:17:48,242 --> 00:17:50,922
We have to be grand.
It's in the title!
387
00:17:51,002 --> 00:17:52,265
There ain't no pockets
in heaven.
388
00:17:52,321 --> 00:17:57,026
Talking globe?!
Thanks, grandma and grandpa!
389
00:17:57,121 --> 00:17:59,194
You got him the talking globe?!
390
00:17:59,298 --> 00:18:03,169
Yes, I did, and I would do it
again! The only good thing
391
00:18:03,275 --> 00:18:05,562
about getting older
is you get to be popular.
392
00:18:05,665 --> 00:18:08,466
If I have to buy
those kids' love, I will.
393
00:18:08,561 --> 00:18:10,650
Let's get that straight
right now.
394
00:18:10,745 --> 00:18:13,266
We were trying
to learn a lesson!
395
00:18:13,345 --> 00:18:15,690
We were all gonna be better people!
Yeah?
396
00:18:15,737 --> 00:18:17,850
Well, I didn't drive 140 miles
397
00:18:17,945 --> 00:18:20,417
to watch my grandkids
learn a lesson.
398
00:18:20,498 --> 00:18:23,745
What, did you read an article
or something?
399
00:18:23,850 --> 00:18:26,433
Relax! Your kids
are gonna be fine!
400
00:18:26,625 --> 00:18:29,658
I just wanted them
to have a heartfelt Christmas,
401
00:18:29,714 --> 00:18:32,162
you know,
to appreciate the orange.
402
00:18:32,273 --> 00:18:34,993
What's the orange?
403
00:18:35,122 --> 00:18:37,986
The orange in the stocking!
404
00:18:38,097 --> 00:18:39,585
Depression?
405
00:18:39,690 --> 00:18:42,465
Your mom got an orange?
She was really grateful?
406
00:18:42,601 --> 00:18:44,474
Oh, God, that?
407
00:18:44,593 --> 00:18:48,097
You get oranges year-round now.
Who cares?
408
00:18:48,202 --> 00:18:50,970
I care! I care!
I care!
409
00:18:53,329 --> 00:18:55,041
She always flips out
at Christmas.
410
00:18:55,179 --> 00:18:57,626
I think she gets too excited.
Oh, no, no, no, no, no.
411
00:18:57,721 --> 00:18:59,466
Don't you look at Mike
like I'm the crazy one.
412
00:18:59,569 --> 00:19:02,226
He is right in there with me.
You're driving him nuts!
413
00:19:02,305 --> 00:19:04,642
He hates it how you follow him
all over the place,
414
00:19:04,761 --> 00:19:07,209
tellin' him all your stories!
He hates it!
415
00:19:07,361 --> 00:19:09,417
He hates it to himself,
but he hates it!
416
00:19:15,794 --> 00:19:18,881
I told you
to give Mike some space.
417
00:19:21,994 --> 00:19:22,994
Hey, crazy.
418
00:19:23,242 --> 00:19:25,617
I'm a horrible,
horrible person.
419
00:19:25,817 --> 00:19:29,217
It's Christmas,
and I yelled at my parents!
420
00:19:29,434 --> 00:19:31,193
Frankie, I told you,
421
00:19:31,369 --> 00:19:34,433
nobody should have their family
in their house for 12 days.
422
00:19:35,345 --> 00:19:36,522
It goes against nature.
423
00:19:37,114 --> 00:19:39,289
It's why animals in the wild
don't come home for Christmas.
424
00:19:40,001 --> 00:19:42,801
You're right. It's too long.
425
00:19:42,938 --> 00:19:46,074
I just wanted everyone to
remember this year as special,
426
00:19:46,178 --> 00:19:47,570
and now
all they're gonna remember
427
00:19:47,689 --> 00:19:50,553
is that I got all grinchy
and tried to steal the presents
428
00:19:50,682 --> 00:19:52,458
and went off on my mom.
429
00:19:52,553 --> 00:19:56,001
They're not gonna remember it for that.
Yes, they will.
430
00:19:56,123 --> 00:19:58,058
No, they won't.How do you know?
431
00:19:58,137 --> 00:20:00,642
'Cause they're gonna remember it
for something else.
432
00:20:01,530 --> 00:20:04,366
Eight maids a-milking
seven swans a-swimmin'
433
00:20:04,502 --> 00:20:06,446
six geese a-layin'
434
00:20:06,701 --> 00:20:09,046
five golden rings
435
00:20:09,534 --> 00:20:12,798
four calling birds
three French hens
436
00:20:12,926 --> 00:20:14,166
two turtledoves
437
00:20:14,310 --> 00:20:17,486
and a partridge
in a pear tree
438
00:20:17,590 --> 00:20:19,798
It turned out to be one
of our best Christmases yet.
439
00:20:19,901 --> 00:20:21,678
Everyone remembered it
as the year
440
00:20:21,750 --> 00:20:24,630
Mike finally did the skit,
and the kids finally learned
441
00:20:24,741 --> 00:20:26,102
to appreciate the oranges.
442
00:20:31,262 --> 00:20:33,582
And as for my parents and me?
We're fine.
443
00:20:33,686 --> 00:20:35,709
'Cause we know that no matter
what gets said,
444
00:20:35,822 --> 00:20:38,270
we love each other,
and after all,
445
00:20:38,398 --> 00:20:41,390
Christmas is about family.
It's as simple as that.
446
00:20:41,749 --> 00:20:46,950
And a partridge
in a pear tree
447
00:20:47,000 --> 00:20:51,550
Repair and Synchronization by
Easy Subtitles Synchronizer 1.0.0.0
35384
Can't find what you're looking for?
Get subtitles in any language from opensubtitles.com, and translate them here.
Afrikaans
Albanian
Amharic
Arabic
Armenian
Azerbaijani
Basque
Belarusian
Bengali
Bosnian
Bulgarian
Catalan
Cebuano
Chichewa
Chinese (Simplified)
Chinese (Traditional)
Corsican
Croatian
Czech
Danish
English
Esperanto
Estonian
Finnish
French
Frisian
Galician
Georgian
German
Greek
Gujarati
Haitian Creole
Hawaiian
Hungarian
Icelandic
Indonesian
Irish
Italian
Japanese
Kazakh
Khmer
Korean
Kurdish (Kurmanji)
Kyrgyz
Lao
Latvian
Lithuanian
Luxembourgish
Macedonian
Malagasy
Malay
Maltese
Maori
Mongolian
Myanmar (Burmese)
Nepali
Norwegian
Pashto
Polish
Portuguese
Romanian
Russian
Samoan
Serbian
Sesotho
Shona
Sinhala
Slovak
Slovenian
Somali
Spanish
Swahili
Swedish
Tajik
Thai
Turkish
Ukrainian
Urdu
Uzbek
Vietnamese
