All language subtitles for Philadelphia s06e10 the Rats.eng

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Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:03,036 --> 00:00:05,256 [Mac] When you come face-to-face with something like that... 2 00:00:05,638 --> 00:00:07,388 what are you supposed to do? 3 00:00:07,707 --> 00:00:09,757 - [Groaning] - [Frank] You just have to laugh. 4 00:00:11,211 --> 00:00:12,961 - Hey, buddy. - Yeah, what's going on there, pal? 5 00:00:13,279 --> 00:00:15,389 Oh, my God. I just found a rat's nest. 6 00:00:15,749 --> 00:00:19,029 Slaughtered about 200 of 'em. 7 00:00:19,552 --> 00:00:21,332 Two-Two hundred? Couldn't be. That's... 8 00:00:21,654 --> 00:00:22,964 Jesus Christ. 9 00:00:23,223 --> 00:00:24,593 It's like... 10 00:00:24,858 --> 00:00:29,718 It's like whole generations of those things have died at my hands, and... 11 00:00:30,463 --> 00:00:33,273 mothers, fathers, grandfathers, little baby rats. 12 00:00:33,733 --> 00:00:35,133 - [Scoffs] - Oh, yeah. 13 00:00:35,402 --> 00:00:38,182 - Wow. - Well, you know, keep up the good work. 14 00:00:38,638 --> 00:00:40,368 Yeah. 15 00:00:40,673 --> 00:00:43,983 Sometimes I wonder though if... 16 00:00:44,511 --> 00:00:46,321 our lives are really more valuable than theirs. 17 00:00:46,646 --> 00:00:49,046 - You know what I mean? - Yeah. 18 00:00:49,449 --> 00:00:50,469 - They are. - Yeah. 19 00:00:50,683 --> 00:00:52,463 - Our lives are, definitely. Yeah. - Without a doubt. 20 00:00:52,786 --> 00:00:54,656 - Yeah. - Without a doubt. 21 00:00:54,988 --> 00:00:56,978 If that makes you feel any... 22 00:00:57,323 --> 00:00:58,693 - Yeah, well... - Mm-hmm. 23 00:00:58,958 --> 00:01:00,448 I suppose I oughta... 24 00:01:00,727 --> 00:01:02,597 Get back to it? 25 00:01:02,929 --> 00:01:04,599 - [Dee] Yep. - [Dennis] Jump right back in there, tiger. 26 00:01:04,898 --> 00:01:07,068 [Mac] Get on the horse, Charlie. Bash. Bash 'em up. 27 00:01:07,434 --> 00:01:09,574 - [Dennis] Do what you do best. - All right. Thanks, guys. 28 00:01:09,936 --> 00:01:12,656 - I just gotta go the bathroom. - Sure. Yeah, yeah, yeah. 29 00:01:13,106 --> 00:01:17,056 - All right, man. He touched me with it. - Ugh! God, what a life, huh? 30 00:01:17,677 --> 00:01:19,607 - Today's his birthday. - Are you kidding me? 31 00:01:19,946 --> 00:01:21,116 - Poor guy... on a day like this. - Oh, my God. 32 00:01:21,347 --> 00:01:22,607 We ought to do something nice for him. 33 00:01:22,849 --> 00:01:24,249 - Definitely. Yeah. Absolutely. - Mm-hmm. 34 00:01:24,517 --> 00:01:27,037 - Oh. You wanna get him a new rat stick? - That's a good idea. 35 00:01:27,454 --> 00:01:29,564 I was thinking maybe we should throw him a surprise party. 36 00:01:29,923 --> 00:01:31,883 He is really bummed. I guess we could do something nice for him. 37 00:01:32,225 --> 00:01:33,805 Definitely. For one day... 38 00:01:34,094 --> 00:01:35,844 let's make the poor bastard feel special. 39 00:01:36,162 --> 00:01:39,702 For one day, let's make this lowly rat killer feel like a king. 40 00:01:40,266 --> 00:01:41,256 Yes. 41 00:01:41,468 --> 00:01:43,108 In the simplest... 42 00:01:43,403 --> 00:01:44,693 - Easiest way. - easiest... 43 00:01:44,938 --> 00:01:46,488 I'm tired today, you know? 44 00:02:20,773 --> 00:02:22,613 [Frank] Here it is. I got it. 45 00:02:22,942 --> 00:02:26,892 I'm thinking we go with a Hawaiian trip-hop... 46 00:02:27,514 --> 00:02:29,064 - underground luau theme. - What? 47 00:02:29,349 --> 00:02:31,129 - Hmm? - What even is that? 48 00:02:31,451 --> 00:02:34,521 Charlie's been hanging around with this guy Duncan from under the bridge... 49 00:02:35,021 --> 00:02:36,921 and he runs with this rough crowd... 50 00:02:37,257 --> 00:02:40,507 and they're all into this Hawaiian underground shit, you know? 51 00:02:41,027 --> 00:02:45,127 And I made a little list of stuff that would really support that theme. 52 00:02:45,765 --> 00:02:47,955 "Fill bar with sand. Roast wild pig. 53 00:02:48,334 --> 00:02:49,644 Invite Duncan and crew." 54 00:02:49,903 --> 00:02:52,153 Ooh, this seems like a whole lot of work. 55 00:02:52,539 --> 00:02:56,049 - Does anybody really even like surprise parties anyway? - I don't. 56 00:02:56,609 --> 00:02:59,949 What the hell's the matter with you? How did you get so cynical? 57 00:03:00,480 --> 00:03:03,610 - Cynical? - You can't even get excited to give your friend a party. 58 00:03:04,117 --> 00:03:07,717 Giving somebody a birthday party... a surprise party... 59 00:03:08,288 --> 00:03:10,428 is one of the greatest things you can do for him. 60 00:03:10,790 --> 00:03:12,490 - Okay, Frank, all right, all right. - All right. 61 00:03:12,792 --> 00:03:15,312 Well, maybe we are being a little cynical. 62 00:03:15,728 --> 00:03:17,428 Clearly, this means a lot to you, so fine. 63 00:03:17,730 --> 00:03:19,430 - We'll jump on board with the party. What's the plan? - Okay. 64 00:03:19,732 --> 00:03:22,452 - The plan is you guys execute this list. - Mm-hmm. 65 00:03:22,902 --> 00:03:26,412 I am gonna take Charlie to the spa for a day to distract him. 66 00:03:26,973 --> 00:03:29,933 Hold on. Why do you get to spend the day at a spa while we do all the legwork? 67 00:03:30,410 --> 00:03:32,550 Because I got these two coupons in the mail. 68 00:03:32,912 --> 00:03:35,102 Okay, I'm pregnant, and you haven't offered me coupons... 69 00:03:35,481 --> 00:03:39,021 or spa days or roasted pigs or surprises or any of those fun things. 70 00:03:39,586 --> 00:03:42,686 Oh, oh, okay. Well, in the interest of not being cynical... 71 00:03:43,189 --> 00:03:44,939 and doing shit for other people... 72 00:03:45,258 --> 00:03:47,868 I'm gonna suggest that we give the two coupons to Dee... 73 00:03:48,294 --> 00:03:49,994 and she does the spa thing. 74 00:03:50,296 --> 00:03:52,876 - Surprise. - Perfect. Thank you. All right, cool. 75 00:03:53,299 --> 00:03:56,399 I will take this coupon and sneak out the back so Charlie doesn't see me. 76 00:03:56,903 --> 00:03:58,603 - Oh, wait, wait. What? What? - What? 77 00:03:58,905 --> 00:04:01,215 No, you have to take Charlie with you to the spa. 78 00:04:01,608 --> 00:04:05,238 - That's the whole thing. You have to distract him. That's... - Oh, shit. Yeah. 79 00:04:05,812 --> 00:04:08,002 Frank, you might be right about us getting cynical. 80 00:04:08,381 --> 00:04:10,341 I just... I just jumped straight to default... 81 00:04:10,683 --> 00:04:12,493 and was gonna throw this second coupon in the trash. 82 00:04:12,819 --> 00:04:14,989 - Right. - But the Charlie thing... We're doing the Charlie thing. 83 00:04:15,355 --> 00:04:17,315 Okay. I got it. I'm on it. 84 00:04:18,191 --> 00:04:19,531 Okay. 85 00:04:22,996 --> 00:04:24,286 Hey, Charlie! 86 00:04:24,530 --> 00:04:26,310 Hey, listen, uh, you've been really stressed... 87 00:04:26,633 --> 00:04:29,563 so I thought I would take you for a spa day, just you and me. 88 00:04:30,036 --> 00:04:31,676 A what day? 89 00:04:31,971 --> 00:04:33,521 - A spa day. - What is this word "spa"? 90 00:04:33,806 --> 00:04:36,266 I feel like you're starting to say a word and you're not finishing it. 91 00:04:36,676 --> 00:04:39,166 Are you trying to say "spaghetti"? Are you taking me for a spaghetti day? 92 00:04:39,579 --> 00:04:42,889 No, Charlie, I wasn't trying to take you for a spaghetti day. 93 00:04:43,416 --> 00:04:45,116 Oh, God, you know what? It doesn't matter. 94 00:04:45,418 --> 00:04:47,168 It's okay. That's all right. I'm doing something nice here. 95 00:04:47,487 --> 00:04:49,737 Tell you what. Let's go to a movie. Wanna go to a movie? 96 00:04:50,123 --> 00:04:53,663 Dee, I go to a movie or a spaghetti place with you, and out there, I'm the rat. 97 00:04:54,227 --> 00:04:57,007 What if I guarantee you that nobody out there will put you into a bag... 98 00:04:57,463 --> 00:04:58,983 and bash you against a telephone pole? 99 00:04:59,265 --> 00:05:00,555 Would that comfort you at all? 100 00:05:00,800 --> 00:05:02,610 No. That's a guarantee you can't make, Dee, all right? 101 00:05:02,935 --> 00:05:04,715 - I'll tell you what. - That's why I'm building this little puppy. 102 00:05:05,038 --> 00:05:06,998 - Yeah. Don't do... Okay. - And no one's getting bashed. 103 00:05:07,340 --> 00:05:09,390 If you don't come with me to the movie... 104 00:05:09,742 --> 00:05:12,522 I'm gonna take this raccoon of yours and bash it into a telephone pole. 105 00:05:12,979 --> 00:05:15,059 No! I can't take any more bashing today, all right? 106 00:05:15,415 --> 00:05:17,345 - Let's go. This will be fun. - All right, let's go. 107 00:05:21,354 --> 00:05:22,754 - [Mac] Dennis. - Yeah? 108 00:05:23,022 --> 00:05:25,452 Check that box of tiki torches. Start setting those up. 109 00:05:25,858 --> 00:05:28,518 - What, this? - Yeah, that box there. 110 00:05:28,961 --> 00:05:31,451 - What is this? We didn't put this in here. - Surprise! 111 00:05:31,864 --> 00:05:34,034 - What is that? What'd you do? - I got you a present, bro. 112 00:05:34,400 --> 00:05:37,940 I'm trying to be less cynical. And Frank is totally right. The surprise is the way to go. 113 00:05:38,504 --> 00:05:39,814 - So you got me a gift. - Yes. 114 00:05:40,073 --> 00:05:42,123 While we were picking up the decorations, I slipped out... 115 00:05:42,475 --> 00:05:44,205 and I got you something I think you're gonna like. 116 00:05:44,510 --> 00:05:47,530 - Okay, all right. [Muttering] - Okay. 117 00:05:48,014 --> 00:05:49,564 - Ah! - Oh! 118 00:05:49,849 --> 00:05:52,979 Oh! Shirt! I love this shirt. 119 00:05:53,486 --> 00:05:55,236 That's great, man. Thank you. 120 00:05:55,555 --> 00:05:57,895 - This isn't the shirt that I picked out. - Yeah. No. Well, no. 121 00:05:58,291 --> 00:06:00,781 - What is this? - It's the shirt that I... that I picked out. 122 00:06:01,194 --> 00:06:02,424 But that's cool. 123 00:06:02,662 --> 00:06:04,332 Here's the thing, man. I... [Chuckles] 124 00:06:04,630 --> 00:06:07,000 I got a little suspicious when you slipped out earlier... 125 00:06:07,400 --> 00:06:09,390 and so I followed you into the store... 126 00:06:09,736 --> 00:06:11,696 and I saw that you were about to make a really bad choice... 127 00:06:12,038 --> 00:06:13,998 and then you did make that choice and you bought that other shirt. 128 00:06:14,340 --> 00:06:16,860 It was a bad shirt. It was an ugly shirt... hideous really. 129 00:06:17,276 --> 00:06:19,416 So I grabbed that shirt out of the bag when you weren't looking... 130 00:06:19,779 --> 00:06:22,089 and I returned it and I bought myself this shirt, which isn't hideous. 131 00:06:22,482 --> 00:06:24,792 - And so, surprise. - That was a good shirt. 132 00:06:25,184 --> 00:06:26,324 No. 133 00:06:26,552 --> 00:06:28,602 This brings me no joy at all. 134 00:06:28,955 --> 00:06:30,265 I feel nothing. 135 00:06:30,523 --> 00:06:32,713 I feel like you just stole money from me... 136 00:06:33,092 --> 00:06:34,962 and then you bought yourself a... 137 00:06:35,294 --> 00:06:36,634 - shirt. - A shirt with your money. 138 00:06:36,896 --> 00:06:38,156 - Yeah. - Well, that is what happened. 139 00:06:38,398 --> 00:06:40,478 [Frank Shouting, Laughing] 140 00:06:40,833 --> 00:06:42,703 That is a ridiculous price, and you know it. 141 00:06:43,035 --> 00:06:46,465 Supposing I bought a pig unseasoned and dressed it myself? 142 00:06:47,006 --> 00:06:48,316 Then what? What then? 143 00:06:48,574 --> 00:06:52,854 Well, that's not what Jerry Carelli said, asshole. 144 00:06:53,513 --> 00:06:56,473 Ha! Pitting two pig dealers against each other. 145 00:06:56,949 --> 00:06:59,409 - Ah, sure. - Frank, are you sure about this luau thing? 146 00:06:59,819 --> 00:07:02,779 - It's a ton of work. - Yeah. Does Charlie even know what a luau is? 147 00:07:03,256 --> 00:07:05,306 I doubt Charlie can even say the word "luau." 148 00:07:05,658 --> 00:07:07,468 How do you know that this is what he wants? 149 00:07:07,794 --> 00:07:10,044 Well, because I read it in his dream book. 150 00:07:10,430 --> 00:07:12,710 - His what? His dream book? - Yeah. 151 00:07:13,099 --> 00:07:15,469 Charlie keeps a book of dreams and aspirations. 152 00:07:15,868 --> 00:07:18,208 They're mostly in pictures and symbols... 153 00:07:18,604 --> 00:07:21,124 but he has been obsessing about this luau thing... 154 00:07:21,541 --> 00:07:23,291 since we met Duncan under the bridge. 155 00:07:23,609 --> 00:07:25,449 Okay, now, my first instinct... 156 00:07:25,778 --> 00:07:27,478 when you say things about meeting people under bridges... 157 00:07:27,780 --> 00:07:30,330 is to berate you for hanging out with people under a bridge... 158 00:07:30,750 --> 00:07:33,120 and to say to you, "Why do you hang out with these people? 159 00:07:33,519 --> 00:07:34,889 You and Charlie shouldn't be asso..." 160 00:07:35,154 --> 00:07:37,844 But I'm not gonna say anything because I don't wanna be cynical anymore. 161 00:07:38,291 --> 00:07:40,161 I'm not gonna say anything. I'm... 162 00:07:40,493 --> 00:07:42,833 - Maybe the bridge is exciting. - The bridge is awesome. 163 00:07:43,229 --> 00:07:45,129 - Ooh. It's probably pretty cool. - [Grunts] 164 00:07:45,465 --> 00:07:47,275 - [Cell Phone Rings] - Ooh. Hold on a second. 165 00:07:47,600 --> 00:07:50,060 Hey. It's the other pig guy. 166 00:07:50,470 --> 00:07:55,480 Ha. So you come crawling back, you cheap sack of shit. 167 00:08:02,482 --> 00:08:04,472 You can't bring food into the theater. 168 00:08:04,817 --> 00:08:06,627 Hmm? Oh, no, I'm not. 169 00:08:06,953 --> 00:08:09,793 - I... I bought it over there with that food. - No, you didn't. 170 00:08:10,256 --> 00:08:11,566 How do you know that? 171 00:08:11,824 --> 00:08:13,524 Because we don't serve spaghetti... 172 00:08:13,826 --> 00:08:15,666 and I just watched you walk in with it. 173 00:08:15,995 --> 00:08:18,215 You called my bluff, sir. I shall dispose of this posthaste. 174 00:08:18,598 --> 00:08:20,588 A moment, please. 175 00:08:20,933 --> 00:08:22,603 Dee, pop this into your purse real quick. 176 00:08:22,902 --> 00:08:24,952 No. Absolutely not. No. Why did you have to bring spaghetti... 177 00:08:25,304 --> 00:08:27,054 You got me hankering for spaghetti and I want it. 178 00:08:27,373 --> 00:08:29,683 - Just eat it fast and we'll go. - No. I wanna enjoy it and watch the movie. 179 00:08:30,076 --> 00:08:31,476 - It's gonna make a mess in my purse. - I'm leaving... 180 00:08:31,744 --> 00:08:33,584 - because the spaghetti is the whole deal for me. - Goddamn it. 181 00:08:33,913 --> 00:08:36,463 Just put it in. Be careful. This is so stupid. 182 00:08:36,883 --> 00:08:39,573 - And there we go! Got rid of it. - Great. Thank you. 183 00:08:40,019 --> 00:08:42,679 Okay. Look at this place, Dee. Look at the size of this place. 184 00:08:45,324 --> 00:08:47,314 - What does 3-D even stand for? - Third dimension. 185 00:08:47,660 --> 00:08:48,950 Just... Please stop talking. 186 00:08:49,195 --> 00:08:51,535 Third dimen... What dimension are we in? 187 00:08:51,931 --> 00:08:53,241 Shh. Charlie, I don't know. 188 00:08:53,499 --> 00:08:55,809 Isn't stuff supposed to pop out at us? 189 00:08:56,202 --> 00:08:58,222 I don't know. I'm not sure. Let's watch and find out. 190 00:08:58,571 --> 00:08:59,911 - [High-pitched Whistle] - Whoa! - [Gasps] 191 00:09:00,172 --> 00:09:02,282 - Did you see that? - Yeah, I saw that. 192 00:09:02,642 --> 00:09:04,722 That came right at you. Is this safe? 193 00:09:05,077 --> 00:09:06,597 - Are you kidding me? - Well, I don't know. 194 00:09:06,879 --> 00:09:09,509 Take the glasses off if you're uncomfortable, okay? 195 00:09:09,949 --> 00:09:12,639 - But then everything's blurry. - Then put the glasses on and shut the hell up. 196 00:09:13,085 --> 00:09:14,135 - [Man] Shh. - You shh. 197 00:09:14,353 --> 00:09:17,193 See, stuff's not safe. Uh-oh. 198 00:09:17,657 --> 00:09:20,147 Whoa. What happened to my meatball? 199 00:09:20,560 --> 00:09:22,260 - [Man] Would you shut up? - Oh, no. 200 00:09:22,562 --> 00:09:25,052 - I bet it flew off when I... - Okay, you are a sleuth. 201 00:09:25,464 --> 00:09:27,304 You've gotten to the bottom of it. That's very exciting. 202 00:09:27,633 --> 00:09:29,383 - Now shut up. - Let me just find it. I'm sorry. 203 00:09:29,702 --> 00:09:31,372 - Charlie, sit down. - Did you see a meatball over here? 204 00:09:31,671 --> 00:09:33,811 If you don't sit down and shut up and watch the movie... 205 00:09:34,173 --> 00:09:35,373 I'm gonna attack you. 206 00:09:35,608 --> 00:09:37,338 I don't care how pregnant I am, I'm gonna attack you. 207 00:09:37,643 --> 00:09:40,273 - I got it. I got it. - You got it? Good. Sit down. 208 00:09:40,713 --> 00:09:41,973 - Got the meatball. - [Woman] Sit down! 209 00:09:42,214 --> 00:09:43,644 - [Man] Quiet down! - The movie's boring. 210 00:09:43,916 --> 00:09:46,956 You... How would you... You're not watching the movie. 211 00:09:47,453 --> 00:09:50,383 [Woman Speaking In Movie] 212 00:09:50,856 --> 00:09:52,606 [Groans] Uh-oh. 213 00:09:52,925 --> 00:09:54,625 - You're not gonna like this. - What happened? 214 00:09:54,927 --> 00:09:58,767 - Ah, nuts. Some spaghetti spilled in your purse a little bit. - Oh, shit. 215 00:09:59,365 --> 00:10:01,145 Want your spaghetti, Charlie? You want your spaghetti? 216 00:10:01,467 --> 00:10:03,987 - Here's your spaghetti. - Oh, don't dump it on the ground like that. 217 00:10:04,403 --> 00:10:06,513 - Shut up and watch the movie. - I don't wanna shut up and watch the movie. 218 00:10:06,872 --> 00:10:08,922 Can't eat spaghetti. Can't follow the movie. Doesn't make sense. 219 00:10:09,275 --> 00:10:11,235 - I'm going back to the bar. I'm taking the spaghetti. - Go to the bar. 220 00:10:11,577 --> 00:10:12,977 - Excuse me. - [Woman] Shut up! 221 00:10:13,245 --> 00:10:15,555 Are you kidding me? Are you kidding me? 222 00:10:17,617 --> 00:10:20,077 - [Grunts] - Dude, I just saw another rat. 223 00:10:20,486 --> 00:10:22,766 [Dennis] There's definitely a ton of rats in here, that's for sure. 224 00:10:23,155 --> 00:10:24,115 I see him. 225 00:10:24,323 --> 00:10:25,553 - Oh, shit. - We gotta distract him. 226 00:10:25,791 --> 00:10:27,901 - I'll tell him the keg exploded. - That's a stupid idea. 227 00:10:28,260 --> 00:10:30,810 - That's a stupid idea. We're going with the burst pipe. - I like the keg idea. 228 00:10:31,230 --> 00:10:32,980 Your ideas are so stupid. Go with the burst pipe. That would never happen. 229 00:10:33,299 --> 00:10:35,349 - Whatever. We gotta go. - [Dennis] A keg would never explode. 230 00:10:35,701 --> 00:10:38,161 Hey, Charlie! Charlie! Charlie boy! 231 00:10:38,571 --> 00:10:40,321 Hey, where'd you get those glasses, bud? 232 00:10:40,640 --> 00:10:43,710 Oh, these? They're just, like, third-dimension glasses, you know? 233 00:10:44,210 --> 00:10:45,990 Don't really work though, 'cause I feel like I'm still seeing stuff... 234 00:10:46,312 --> 00:10:48,092 in whatever dimension we live in. 235 00:10:48,414 --> 00:10:49,374 - Uh, right. - Yeah. 236 00:10:49,582 --> 00:10:51,422 You can't really go in the bar right now, bro. 237 00:10:51,751 --> 00:10:52,891 - Why not? - A keg exploded. 238 00:10:53,119 --> 00:10:53,989 - A pipe... - Yeah. 239 00:10:54,186 --> 00:10:55,386 Holy shit. Can that happen? 240 00:10:55,621 --> 00:10:58,081 A piece of metal flew off the keg and hit Dennis in the dick. 241 00:10:58,491 --> 00:11:00,071 Holy shit! Are you okay? 242 00:11:00,359 --> 00:11:03,019 Yeah. No, I-I'm fine. I got lucky. 243 00:11:03,462 --> 00:11:06,122 It mashed right into it. We all thought he was gonna lose it. 244 00:11:06,565 --> 00:11:09,085 Charlie, it lumped it up and mangled it like a chicken potpie down there. 245 00:11:09,502 --> 00:11:11,052 - Oh, God. - Dickless Dennis. 246 00:11:11,337 --> 00:11:13,237 - No. It's totally fine. - That's what we should call him... Dickless Dennis. 247 00:11:13,572 --> 00:11:15,912 [Laughing] 248 00:11:16,308 --> 00:11:18,998 Oh, Dickless Dennis. But it doesn't apply... 249 00:11:19,445 --> 00:11:21,935 because my dick totally went back to normal, and it's fine now. 250 00:11:22,348 --> 00:11:23,778 - I'll show it to you. - I don't wanna see it. 251 00:11:24,050 --> 00:11:26,540 - Moving on, how was the spa? - Spa? 252 00:11:26,952 --> 00:11:29,972 Sp... Uh... Oh, spaghetti. How's my spaghetti? Dee threw it on the floor. 253 00:11:30,456 --> 00:11:32,356 The spa. The spa that Dee took you to. 254 00:11:32,692 --> 00:11:34,182 Oh, no, she took me to a movie. 255 00:11:34,460 --> 00:11:37,150 Yeah, it was lame. I couldn't understand it. Made no sense. 256 00:11:38,330 --> 00:11:39,640 That cynical bitch. 257 00:11:42,401 --> 00:11:44,801 Hello. I would like to redeem this coupon. 258 00:11:45,204 --> 00:11:47,514 - Go ahead and toss this one in the trash for me. - [Dennis] Busted! See? 259 00:11:47,907 --> 00:11:50,127 - You're busted, Dee. - What? 260 00:11:50,509 --> 00:11:53,699 - What are you guys doing here? - I'm taking Charlie to the spa because he's stressed. 261 00:11:54,213 --> 00:11:56,323 A keg exploded in the bar. Blew Dennis's dick off. 262 00:11:56,682 --> 00:11:59,292 - No, no. My dick is fine, Dee. - It's a mess down there. It's a monster. 263 00:11:59,719 --> 00:12:02,379 - Let me have those coupons. - No. You said I could have them. 264 00:12:02,822 --> 00:12:04,162 Dee, you were supposed to take Charlie. 265 00:12:04,423 --> 00:12:06,263 I tried to take Charlie, but he refused to go. 266 00:12:06,592 --> 00:12:08,262 What is your spaghetti policy here? 267 00:12:08,561 --> 00:12:10,171 Are you hearing this? Are you hearing this? 268 00:12:10,463 --> 00:12:12,633 - He doesn't belong in a place like this. - All right, come on. 269 00:12:12,998 --> 00:12:14,198 We're wasting time. 270 00:12:14,433 --> 00:12:16,273 Go get Duncan and the bridge crew and bring them to the bar. 271 00:12:16,602 --> 00:12:18,502 - I'll occupy Charlie. - No. 272 00:12:18,838 --> 00:12:20,448 Where's the robes? 273 00:12:26,212 --> 00:12:27,962 [Mac] I think this is it, right here. 274 00:12:28,280 --> 00:12:30,620 - This is sketchy as hell. - [Exhales] Yeah. 275 00:12:31,016 --> 00:12:33,536 [Hawaiian] 276 00:12:35,921 --> 00:12:37,561 [Continues] 277 00:12:37,857 --> 00:12:39,727 Hey. Um, yeah, we're looking for Duncan. 278 00:12:42,828 --> 00:12:46,488 - Oh, let's go. - Oh, yeah, we should take that as a sign, right? 279 00:12:50,402 --> 00:12:51,712 Come on in. 280 00:12:51,971 --> 00:12:53,281 Yeah? 281 00:12:57,610 --> 00:12:58,980 [Woman Moans] 282 00:13:00,012 --> 00:13:01,532 You pregnant. 283 00:13:05,551 --> 00:13:07,921 - [Woman Moaning] - Come on now. 284 00:13:08,320 --> 00:13:11,250 - What is happening in here? - I don't know. 285 00:13:11,724 --> 00:13:13,474 - Come on now. - All right. 286 00:13:13,793 --> 00:13:15,663 Mr. Duncan, we were wondering if we could talk to you about... 287 00:13:15,995 --> 00:13:19,425 I ain't no Duncan. It's this nigga right here about to go level three and shit. 288 00:13:19,965 --> 00:13:21,515 - What's up? - [Dennis] Oh, you're Duncan. 289 00:13:21,801 --> 00:13:24,611 Mr. Duncan, we were wondering if you could come to a surprise party for Charlie. 290 00:13:25,070 --> 00:13:25,940 Who? 291 00:13:26,138 --> 00:13:27,398 Charlie. He's Frank's friend. 292 00:13:27,640 --> 00:13:29,950 You guys have all been hanging out under a bridge. 293 00:13:30,342 --> 00:13:32,242 Oh, yeah. Frank. I know that bitch. 294 00:13:32,578 --> 00:13:34,478 Okay. Hey, listen. Frank mentioned that you might be willing... 295 00:13:34,814 --> 00:13:37,214 Oh, shit! Level three, son! 296 00:13:37,616 --> 00:13:38,846 Yo! Level three! 297 00:13:39,084 --> 00:13:42,104 Guys, come over here. This is bizarre, okay? 298 00:13:42,588 --> 00:13:45,338 Charlie should not have anything to do with these people. They are deranged. 299 00:13:45,791 --> 00:13:48,221 Frank has too much influence over this whole thing, all right? 300 00:13:48,627 --> 00:13:51,027 - I think we gotta stop and think about what Charlie wants. - Yeah. 301 00:13:51,430 --> 00:13:53,130 We need to get our hands on Charlie's dream book... 302 00:13:53,432 --> 00:13:55,072 and figure out what that kid wants ourselves. 303 00:13:55,367 --> 00:13:56,597 [Moaning Continues] 304 00:13:56,836 --> 00:13:59,936 - Mother pus bucket! - You piece of shit! You broke my wall! 305 00:14:00,439 --> 00:14:03,539 What I tell you? Huh, son? 306 00:14:04,043 --> 00:14:06,093 - [Mac] Should we call the police? - No, no. Let's just go. 307 00:14:06,445 --> 00:14:08,555 - Let's get the hell out of here. - All right. 308 00:14:12,451 --> 00:14:14,591 Charlie, let's go. Get in here. 309 00:14:14,954 --> 00:14:16,684 - Oh! Ooh! - Whew! 310 00:14:16,989 --> 00:14:19,539 Hey, guys, the management needs everybody to get out... 311 00:14:19,959 --> 00:14:21,739 because they caught a guy jerking off in here... 312 00:14:22,061 --> 00:14:23,901 and they're gonna send in a crew to wipe down the loads. 313 00:14:24,230 --> 00:14:26,130 Go ahead. Go on. Let's go. 314 00:14:26,465 --> 00:14:28,835 God, it's terrible. It's really disgusting. 315 00:14:29,235 --> 00:14:31,375 Ah. Okay. 316 00:14:31,737 --> 00:14:34,397 Get rid of all the strange dongs. [Laughs] 317 00:14:34,840 --> 00:14:35,830 - Oh. - Yeah. 318 00:14:36,041 --> 00:14:38,031 - [Coughs] A little bit. - I don't get it, man. 319 00:14:38,377 --> 00:14:40,897 What's so relaxing about sitting around in a hot, wet room? 320 00:14:41,313 --> 00:14:43,333 It's all about opening up your pores, Charlie. 321 00:14:43,682 --> 00:14:45,082 - Yeah. - Take your robe off. 322 00:14:45,351 --> 00:14:47,521 Yeah. That's it. 323 00:14:47,887 --> 00:14:50,027 You got your clothes on. You gotta take your clothes off. 324 00:14:50,389 --> 00:14:52,609 What? No way, dude. I'm not getting naked in public. 325 00:14:52,992 --> 00:14:55,682 [Sighs] Suit yourself, all right? 326 00:14:56,128 --> 00:14:58,588 - I am going to roast like a pig. - All right. 327 00:14:58,998 --> 00:15:01,518 - I'm gonna eat spaghetti. - [Sighs] 328 00:15:01,934 --> 00:15:03,164 Oh, God. 329 00:15:04,370 --> 00:15:05,770 [Dennis] Whoa. Hey, guys, guys, guys. 330 00:15:06,038 --> 00:15:09,518 I bet you this is it. "Dram... Dram bach." I bet that means "dream book." 331 00:15:10,075 --> 00:15:12,185 Yeah. Look at this... pictures and symbols. 332 00:15:12,544 --> 00:15:16,054 I don't see anything about our stupid luau, but, uh, this looks weird. 333 00:15:16,615 --> 00:15:20,425 - What do you make of that, guys? - That looks like a drawing of a pair of jeans. 334 00:15:21,020 --> 00:15:23,740 A plus sign and a chicken. 335 00:15:24,189 --> 00:15:25,589 "Denim chicken." 336 00:15:25,858 --> 00:15:27,468 Denim chicken. 337 00:15:27,760 --> 00:15:30,750 Okay, guys, my gut is telling me to throw this book in the trash. 338 00:15:31,230 --> 00:15:32,600 - Well, yeah. - It's absolute nonsense. 339 00:15:32,865 --> 00:15:35,525 We're all feeling the same things, but we need to fight that instinct. 340 00:15:35,968 --> 00:15:37,748 We have to throw a party for Charlie. It's so simple. 341 00:15:38,070 --> 00:15:39,770 - If we can't do that, what does that say about us? - You're right. 342 00:15:40,072 --> 00:15:42,322 This isn't about us. Let's not be cynical. Let's do what the kid wants. 343 00:15:42,708 --> 00:15:45,368 If he wants a werm... hat... 344 00:15:45,811 --> 00:15:47,301 - [Dee] Worm hat. - [Dennis] Worm hat. 345 00:15:47,579 --> 00:15:49,419 How do we get him a worm hat? I don't know what that is. 346 00:15:49,748 --> 00:15:52,028 - Maybe there's a drawing or... What is that? - That's a bird with teeth. 347 00:15:52,418 --> 00:15:53,708 [Dennis] It sure is. 348 00:15:53,953 --> 00:15:56,093 We don't have a lot of time. Let's figure out the best we can do. 349 00:15:56,455 --> 00:15:58,205 - We can do it. - We'll do these things. We'll do these things. 350 00:15:58,524 --> 00:15:59,814 - Okay. - Let's go. Okay. 351 00:16:05,431 --> 00:16:07,861 Dude, how much longer do we have to stay in here? 352 00:16:08,267 --> 00:16:10,317 Come on. Just relax. Take your clothes off. 353 00:16:10,669 --> 00:16:12,509 I feel trapped in here, Frank. 354 00:16:12,838 --> 00:16:14,978 [Panting] I'm trapped like a rat. 355 00:16:15,341 --> 00:16:17,621 Holy shit, I'm trapped like a rat, aren't I? 356 00:16:18,010 --> 00:16:19,530 - No, you're not, Charlie. - I'm a rat in here! 357 00:16:19,812 --> 00:16:22,062 I'm a rat! [Panting] I'm trapped like a... 358 00:16:22,448 --> 00:16:24,698 - [Screams] I gotta get out of here. - Calm down, Charlie. 359 00:16:25,084 --> 00:16:27,424 I'm tired of being in weird places, Frank, 'cause I'm trapped like a rat. 360 00:16:27,820 --> 00:16:30,070 Calm down, Charlie. Calm down. Relax. All right, all right. 361 00:16:30,456 --> 00:16:31,686 - I gotta get out of here! - Now calm down. 362 00:16:31,924 --> 00:16:34,324 - How do I get this off? [Screaming] - Take it easy. 363 00:16:34,727 --> 00:16:36,017 - [Hysterical Laughter] - Charlie. 364 00:16:36,261 --> 00:16:38,311 - Take it easy. - Just bash me, Frank. 365 00:16:38,664 --> 00:16:41,294 - I'm not gonna bash you, Charlie. - Just bash me like a rat! 366 00:16:41,734 --> 00:16:43,464 Bash me like a rat and get it over with! 367 00:16:44,970 --> 00:16:46,260 Oh. Sorry, guys. 368 00:16:46,505 --> 00:16:48,255 Just let me know when you're done. 369 00:16:48,574 --> 00:16:50,324 I'm the guy who wipes down the loads. 370 00:16:51,577 --> 00:16:52,887 [Groans] 371 00:16:57,016 --> 00:16:58,216 Hurry up. 372 00:16:58,450 --> 00:17:00,910 - I'm not wearing this stupid thing, and that's it. - It's a lei. 373 00:17:01,320 --> 00:17:03,310 [All] Surprise! 374 00:17:03,655 --> 00:17:05,935 What the shit is this? Where's my luau? 375 00:17:06,325 --> 00:17:07,695 - We went around you, Frank. - Yeah. 376 00:17:07,960 --> 00:17:09,450 - Happy birthday, Charlie. - Happy birthday. 377 00:17:09,728 --> 00:17:11,458 Happy birthday? Oh. 378 00:17:11,764 --> 00:17:14,604 Is that why you guys were doing all that weird shit with me today? 379 00:17:15,067 --> 00:17:17,057 Yeah. We were trying to distract you so we could plan your party. 380 00:17:17,403 --> 00:17:19,513 Thanks, guys. Yeah. It's not my birthday though. 381 00:17:19,872 --> 00:17:21,182 - Hmm? - It's not your birthday? 382 00:17:21,440 --> 00:17:24,190 - [Charlie] No. - No, dicks. It's my birthday. 383 00:17:24,643 --> 00:17:26,163 - Wha... - Are you kidding me? 384 00:17:26,445 --> 00:17:28,815 - No, I'm not kidding you. - Wait a second. 385 00:17:29,214 --> 00:17:31,524 Were you trying to get us to plan your surprise party? 386 00:17:31,917 --> 00:17:33,667 Why wouldn't you just plan it yourself? 387 00:17:33,986 --> 00:17:35,356 Well, that's lame. 388 00:17:35,621 --> 00:17:38,431 This way I get my surprise party... 389 00:17:38,891 --> 00:17:41,911 and I give you the satisfaction of doing something nice for somebody. 390 00:17:42,394 --> 00:17:44,264 - Oh, my God. - That is not doing something nice. That is tricking us. 391 00:17:44,596 --> 00:17:46,406 - Son of a bitch. - Where's Duncan? 392 00:17:46,732 --> 00:17:48,192 You should not be hanging out with Duncan. 393 00:17:48,467 --> 00:17:49,957 You should not be associating with people like that. 394 00:17:50,235 --> 00:17:51,905 I'm saying it. I don't care. It's coming out of my mouth. 395 00:17:52,204 --> 00:17:54,014 Those weird bridge people that are like... 396 00:17:54,339 --> 00:17:55,449 - Yeah. - Yeah. 397 00:17:55,674 --> 00:17:56,844 All that "hawwoowin lauow"? 398 00:17:57,076 --> 00:17:59,006 - I knew he couldn't say it. - Luau. Luau. 399 00:17:59,344 --> 00:18:01,124 - What is it? Hello. - [Dennis] Luau. Luau. 400 00:18:01,447 --> 00:18:03,057 - It's not a word. - Huh? 401 00:18:03,348 --> 00:18:05,398 What do we got going on over here, guys? 402 00:18:05,751 --> 00:18:07,921 Well, Charlie, when we thought it was your birthday... 403 00:18:08,287 --> 00:18:11,657 we went through your dream book and we tried to re-create some of the stuff we found in there. 404 00:18:12,191 --> 00:18:14,681 Yes, that's okay. Um... 405 00:18:15,094 --> 00:18:16,524 - Denim chicken? - [All] Yes! 406 00:18:16,795 --> 00:18:18,105 - Yeah, denim chicken. - [Laughs] 407 00:18:18,363 --> 00:18:20,883 - Now I got to reroute the pig delivery. - Nobody gives a shit. 408 00:18:21,300 --> 00:18:24,230 - So we also have the bird, with teeth. - Yep. 409 00:18:24,703 --> 00:18:26,893 Wow! Okay. 410 00:18:27,272 --> 00:18:29,852 And I'm assuming the teeth are fake, yes? 411 00:18:30,275 --> 00:18:33,315 Yes. Well, they're not real human teeth, if that's what you're asking me. 412 00:18:33,812 --> 00:18:37,092 No, did you discover a bird with teeth in this fashion? 413 00:18:37,616 --> 00:18:39,316 - That does not exist in nature. - Okay. 414 00:18:39,618 --> 00:18:42,488 I'm not sure about that, but either way, good glue work. 415 00:18:42,955 --> 00:18:45,415 Do any of you assholes wanna know how old I am? 416 00:18:45,824 --> 00:18:47,134 - Whatever, Frank. - Nobody... 417 00:18:47,392 --> 00:18:49,442 - All right, so... - Charlie, this is my favorite part. 418 00:18:49,795 --> 00:18:52,165 We weren't quite sure what a worm hat was, right? 419 00:18:52,564 --> 00:18:54,264 So we made a few of 'em. This is the first one. 420 00:18:54,566 --> 00:18:56,296 It's a hat made of worms, okay? 421 00:18:56,602 --> 00:18:59,212 And then option number two is a hat that you put on. 422 00:18:59,638 --> 00:19:01,888 And when you do that, you look like maybe you're a worm. 423 00:19:02,274 --> 00:19:04,884 - Like a worm, yeah. - And then the third one... and this is the best one... 424 00:19:05,310 --> 00:19:07,530 is a hat for your worm. 425 00:19:07,913 --> 00:19:09,873 Your teeny tiny little worm gets a teeny tiny little hat. 426 00:19:10,215 --> 00:19:11,525 If you want him to be fancy. 427 00:19:11,783 --> 00:19:13,653 - So which one is it? - Which one were you talking about? 428 00:19:13,986 --> 00:19:16,206 Well, I don't recall ever writing "worm hat." 429 00:19:16,588 --> 00:19:18,638 Yeah, yeah, yeah. It was in your dream book. Your... 430 00:19:18,991 --> 00:19:20,511 Oh! [German Accent] "Wermhat." 431 00:19:20,792 --> 00:19:24,602 That's a German guy. His name's Hans Wermhat. He appears in my dreams. 432 00:19:25,197 --> 00:19:27,977 He drives a biplane and he shoots it at me, and I run through a field. 433 00:19:28,433 --> 00:19:31,363 You know what? You guys blow. I'm gonna go find Duncan. 434 00:19:31,837 --> 00:19:33,947 - [All] Go! Go! - Get lost! Wow! Guys! 435 00:19:34,306 --> 00:19:38,026 Wow! The denim chicken, the bird with teeth, Wermhat's worm hat. 436 00:19:38,610 --> 00:19:41,830 I don't know what to say, man. This is just what I needed today. 437 00:19:42,347 --> 00:19:44,307 Guess what, buddy. There's one more thing. 438 00:19:47,085 --> 00:19:48,835 Is that what I think it is? 439 00:19:49,154 --> 00:19:51,174 - That's a new rat stick, dude. [Laughs] - Yeah. 440 00:19:51,523 --> 00:19:53,453 And you can bash up a whole bunch of rats with one quick strike... 441 00:19:53,792 --> 00:19:55,282 - so it's more humane. - Yeah? 442 00:19:57,629 --> 00:19:59,029 Oh, man. 443 00:19:59,298 --> 00:20:00,878 - What do you think? - Oh, you like it? 444 00:20:02,134 --> 00:20:04,184 - I love it. I mean... - [Dee] Aw. 445 00:20:04,536 --> 00:20:07,256 I don't know what to say 'cause no one's ever really, um... 446 00:20:07,706 --> 00:20:09,546 I don't know what to say, guys. 447 00:20:09,875 --> 00:20:11,455 You don't have to say anything, man. 448 00:20:11,743 --> 00:20:13,613 Maybe I could give it a quick whirl in the basement... 449 00:20:13,946 --> 00:20:16,136 and see if I could kill a couple rats. 450 00:20:16,515 --> 00:20:17,775 - Absolutely. You've earned it. - You should. 451 00:20:18,016 --> 00:20:19,476 Go bash 'em up, buddy. 452 00:20:21,153 --> 00:20:23,173 [Laughs] Whoo! 453 00:20:23,522 --> 00:20:25,542 [All Sigh] 454 00:20:25,891 --> 00:20:27,591 - What a life. - Yeah. 455 00:21:04,930 --> 00:21:07,510 [Voices Speaking Backwards] 456 00:21:12,738 --> 00:21:13,608 English - US - SDH 457 00:21:13,658 --> 00:21:18,208 Repair and Synchronization by Easy Subtitles Synchronizer 1.0.0.0 38778

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