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Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:04,741 --> 00:00:06,968 _ 2 00:00:07,341 --> 00:00:10,509 (PHONE RINGING) 3 00:00:10,972 --> 00:00:14,974 Aw. Oh. 4 00:00:19,938 --> 00:00:21,747 (YAWNING): Hey. 5 00:00:21,772 --> 00:00:23,582 Hey, birthday girl. 6 00:00:23,607 --> 00:00:25,240 How's it feel to be 16? 7 00:00:25,242 --> 00:00:26,575 Oh, I must look terrible. 8 00:00:26,577 --> 00:00:27,976 I just woke up. 9 00:00:27,978 --> 00:00:30,379 Well, I made plans for us. Can I come over? 10 00:00:30,381 --> 00:00:32,347 (SIGHS) I wish, but I'm sure my parents 11 00:00:32,349 --> 00:00:34,082 already made plans for my birthday. 12 00:00:34,084 --> 00:00:36,218 They're so gay for me. 13 00:00:36,220 --> 00:00:37,386 Morning. 14 00:00:37,388 --> 00:00:39,655 There she is. Big day today. 15 00:00:39,657 --> 00:00:41,690 Oh, please don't make a big thing of it. 16 00:00:41,692 --> 00:00:43,158 Are you kidding? Come on! 17 00:00:43,160 --> 00:00:45,260 Battery recycling only comes once a year. 18 00:00:45,262 --> 00:00:46,769 Yeah. It's like Christmas, 19 00:00:46,794 --> 00:00:50,043 but instead of presents, you might get mercury poisoning. 20 00:00:50,519 --> 00:00:51,908 Tha-That's it? 21 00:00:51,933 --> 00:00:54,136 You don't have anything else to say to me? 22 00:00:54,138 --> 00:00:55,470 Yes. 23 00:00:55,472 --> 00:00:58,006 I need you to drag that duffel bag full of batteries 24 00:00:58,008 --> 00:00:59,675 down to the library. Okay? 25 00:00:59,677 --> 00:01:01,013 If it catches on fire on the way there, 26 00:01:01,038 --> 00:01:03,138 just throw it in someone else's garbage and run. 27 00:01:11,133 --> 00:01:12,521 (DOOR CLOSES) 28 00:01:12,523 --> 00:01:14,122 Okay, she's gone. She's gone. 29 00:01:14,124 --> 00:01:16,825 And she totally thinks that we forgot her birthday! 30 00:01:16,827 --> 00:01:18,794 (CHUCKLES) Look what I saved. 31 00:01:18,796 --> 00:01:20,028 This is a drawing 32 00:01:20,030 --> 00:01:21,563 that Sam did when she was eight 33 00:01:21,565 --> 00:01:24,278 of her dream sweet 16 party. 34 00:01:24,303 --> 00:01:26,268 We are gonna bring this to life. 35 00:01:26,270 --> 00:01:27,936 Does it seem like a giant misfire 36 00:01:27,938 --> 00:01:30,339 to give a 16-year-old an eight-year-old's birthday party? 37 00:01:30,341 --> 00:01:31,907 Oh, Tyler. Don't be a dum-dum dummy. 38 00:01:31,909 --> 00:01:33,976 Listen, I know this is silly. 39 00:01:33,978 --> 00:01:37,079 I just, I want Sam to know that her dreams can come true. 40 00:01:37,081 --> 00:01:39,248 Yeah, before she's old enough to realize they don't, 41 00:01:39,250 --> 00:01:42,150 which usually happens sometime after college. 42 00:01:42,152 --> 00:01:44,186 Was that some sort of dig at me? 43 00:01:49,393 --> 00:01:50,726 I'm Charlie. 44 00:01:50,728 --> 00:01:52,585 My mom left my dad 45 00:01:52,610 --> 00:01:54,810 and now I live in this hotel. 46 00:01:59,450 --> 00:02:00,869 Hey. 47 00:02:00,871 --> 00:02:02,237 Looks like there's a few birthday surprises 48 00:02:02,239 --> 00:02:03,805 at the bottom of the pool. 49 00:02:03,807 --> 00:02:08,087 What? Nobody has ever dropped things into water for me. 50 00:02:08,112 --> 00:02:09,845 - Aw. - (CHUCKLES) 51 00:02:13,417 --> 00:02:16,218 You think my dad's gonna come back? 52 00:02:20,024 --> 00:02:21,757 (CHUCKLES) What are these? 53 00:02:21,759 --> 00:02:23,125 Open them. 54 00:02:24,461 --> 00:02:26,995 "I." 55 00:02:28,730 --> 00:02:29,998 "You." 56 00:02:30,543 --> 00:02:33,018 - I don't get it. - CHARLIE: Mom! I found an egg 57 00:02:33,043 --> 00:02:34,894 with a necklace in it that says "love." 58 00:02:34,919 --> 00:02:37,420 Hey! That belongs to her! 59 00:02:38,137 --> 00:02:39,408 Love? 60 00:02:40,344 --> 00:02:41,376 You love me? 61 00:02:41,956 --> 00:02:43,890 Are you really gonna make me say it? 62 00:02:44,173 --> 00:02:47,095 Only if you want me to say it back. 63 00:02:48,439 --> 00:02:49,751 I love you. 64 00:02:49,753 --> 00:02:51,314 I love you, too. 65 00:02:54,258 --> 00:02:55,857 I'm going after my necklace. 66 00:02:56,569 --> 00:02:58,694 Hey, turd! Get over here. 67 00:02:58,696 --> 00:02:59,928 Aah! 68 00:03:02,766 --> 00:03:06,168 Spoiler alert: these things are full of newspapers. 69 00:03:06,170 --> 00:03:07,736 Candy costs extra. 70 00:03:07,738 --> 00:03:10,005 Yeah, but who doesn't want to take a baseball bat 71 00:03:10,007 --> 00:03:11,773 to the news these days? 72 00:03:11,775 --> 00:03:13,542 I thought the only thing that got smashed at these things 73 00:03:13,544 --> 00:03:14,843 was your dad. 74 00:03:14,845 --> 00:03:16,366 Oh, honey, can you believe this? 75 00:03:16,391 --> 00:03:18,023 Look it. We are giving our baby 76 00:03:18,048 --> 00:03:20,182 the sweet 16 of her dreams. 77 00:03:20,184 --> 00:03:22,517 Why do they call it "sweet 16"? 78 00:03:22,519 --> 00:03:25,729 I did the most dirty, horrible things when I was 16. 79 00:03:26,557 --> 00:03:28,357 Hi! Sorry we're late. 80 00:03:28,359 --> 00:03:29,758 We had to take the bus. 81 00:03:29,760 --> 00:03:32,227 Uh, related: I am sorry that I smell like pee. 82 00:03:32,229 --> 00:03:33,996 - Oh. Oh! - (DOOR CLOSES OUTSIDE) 83 00:03:33,998 --> 00:03:35,897 Okay, that's Samantha. That is definitely the car door slam 84 00:03:35,899 --> 00:03:37,947 of a teenage girl who thinks her family forgot her birthday. 85 00:03:37,972 --> 00:03:39,167 Everybody over here. Okay. 86 00:03:39,169 --> 00:03:41,003 Quiet, quiet, quiet. Will you guys get the lights? 87 00:03:41,005 --> 00:03:43,464 - MATT: Yeah, yeah. - Oh, she's gonna love this. 88 00:03:43,761 --> 00:03:45,939 My family's still not back. 89 00:03:45,964 --> 00:03:49,011 This morning that would've upset me, but now I'm glad. 90 00:03:49,013 --> 00:03:52,493 Really? Today was so special 91 00:03:52,782 --> 00:03:56,118 and I want to make it more special with you. 92 00:03:56,710 --> 00:03:58,476 What were you thinking? 93 00:03:58,501 --> 00:03:59,782 Let's go upstairs. 94 00:04:00,987 --> 00:04:03,464 I want you to be my first. 95 00:04:03,880 --> 00:04:05,980 Samantha! 96 00:04:06,130 --> 00:04:07,329 First what? 97 00:04:08,098 --> 00:04:10,732 - Surprise. - Surprise. 98 00:04:10,734 --> 00:04:12,401 Oh, my God! 99 00:04:15,978 --> 00:04:18,073 - (DOOR SLAMS) - I'm just gonna go... 100 00:04:18,075 --> 00:04:19,041 Nope! 101 00:04:19,043 --> 00:04:20,884 Okay. (CLEARS THROAT) 102 00:04:24,125 --> 00:04:25,985 _ 103 00:04:29,250 --> 00:04:30,552 South America. 104 00:04:30,554 --> 00:04:32,921 It has mystery; it's full of monkeys, 105 00:04:32,923 --> 00:04:35,671 and Loris can get us a great deal. 106 00:04:35,696 --> 00:04:39,461 Or we can rent an RV and drive around the country. 107 00:04:39,463 --> 00:04:40,896 We could shower at truck stops. 108 00:04:40,898 --> 00:04:42,397 You always wanted to do that. 109 00:04:42,399 --> 00:04:45,233 Oh, I hate for you to find out this way, dear, 110 00:04:45,235 --> 00:04:46,935 but I've already done that. 111 00:04:46,937 --> 00:04:47,805 Oh. 112 00:04:47,830 --> 00:04:50,839 John, I want a huge adventure. 113 00:04:50,841 --> 00:04:54,342 (WHISPERING): Let's get lost in the mystery of South America. 114 00:04:54,344 --> 00:04:57,212 WOMAN: Hola. �Como estas? Gracias por invitarme. 115 00:04:57,214 --> 00:05:01,083 Me llamo Lala y voy a ense�arles espa�ol. 116 00:05:01,085 --> 00:05:03,885 My name is Lala and I'm here to teach you Spanish. 117 00:05:04,291 --> 00:05:06,054 It's so sexy. 118 00:05:06,470 --> 00:05:08,159 �Como te llamas? 119 00:05:09,237 --> 00:05:13,626 El llama e Joan or Joanie. 120 00:05:13,651 --> 00:05:15,610 Excellent. Now you, John. 121 00:05:15,635 --> 00:05:16,767 What is your name? 122 00:05:16,792 --> 00:05:17,966 John. 123 00:05:17,968 --> 00:05:19,301 Okay. 124 00:05:19,303 --> 00:05:20,969 Please, Lala. 125 00:05:20,971 --> 00:05:24,206 Teach us everything we need to survive our adventure. 126 00:05:24,208 --> 00:05:27,175 Yeah, yeah. Uh, ethnic food doesn't always agree with us, 127 00:05:27,177 --> 00:05:30,812 so, uh, how do you say "bathroom"? 128 00:05:30,814 --> 00:05:32,914 Bathroom is ba�o. 129 00:05:32,916 --> 00:05:35,650 Say it with me. Ba�o. 130 00:05:35,652 --> 00:05:37,719 Ba�o. 131 00:05:37,721 --> 00:05:38,854 Now you, John. 132 00:05:39,144 --> 00:05:40,410 Bonbo. 133 00:05:40,669 --> 00:05:42,657 Ba�o. 134 00:05:42,659 --> 00:05:44,159 That's what I said. 135 00:05:44,161 --> 00:05:46,094 Good... enough. 136 00:05:46,096 --> 00:05:49,203 So, um, where is the bathroom? 137 00:05:49,228 --> 00:05:52,687 �Donde esta el ba�o? 138 00:05:53,531 --> 00:05:57,250 Uh, where is bonbo? 139 00:06:00,145 --> 00:06:04,746 Hi, uh, Mom needs the balloons for Sam's birthday party. 140 00:06:04,748 --> 00:06:06,648 No, en espa�ol. 141 00:06:06,650 --> 00:06:09,351 We're studying for our aventura. 142 00:06:09,353 --> 00:06:10,730 (CHUCKLES) Sometimes if you just 143 00:06:10,755 --> 00:06:12,187 add flair it works. 144 00:06:12,189 --> 00:06:14,623 I haven't spoken Spanish since high school. 145 00:06:14,625 --> 00:06:17,692 Pero, uh, mi madre necessita los globos 146 00:06:17,694 --> 00:06:19,761 para la fiesta de Sam. 147 00:06:19,763 --> 00:06:24,211 Oh, my. Do all Spanish speakers speak that fast? 148 00:06:24,236 --> 00:06:25,700 You know, Mom-Mom, if you're having trouble, 149 00:06:25,702 --> 00:06:27,869 there are a few apps you can get at the app store 150 00:06:27,871 --> 00:06:30,005 - that can translate for you. - No, honey. 151 00:06:30,007 --> 00:06:32,240 I need to do things the authentic way. 152 00:06:32,242 --> 00:06:35,327 That's why we buy our tortillas from the lady in the wheelchair. 153 00:06:35,352 --> 00:06:37,118 She makes them with her feet. 154 00:06:38,282 --> 00:06:40,582 The best way to learn a foreign language 155 00:06:40,584 --> 00:06:42,517 is to totally immerse ourselves. 156 00:06:42,519 --> 00:06:44,019 That's what Lala said 157 00:06:44,021 --> 00:06:46,588 when she canceled our next six weeks of lessons. 158 00:06:46,590 --> 00:06:47,544 Oh. 159 00:06:47,569 --> 00:06:48,841 Gracias. 160 00:06:49,723 --> 00:06:50,759 Hola. 161 00:06:50,761 --> 00:06:51,826 Bienvenidos. 162 00:06:51,828 --> 00:06:53,695 Oh, I think he understood me. 163 00:06:53,697 --> 00:06:56,774 �Le gustar� comprar alguna de las frutas? 164 00:06:56,799 --> 00:06:59,201 Uh. �Esos? 165 00:06:59,203 --> 00:07:00,235 Ah, manzanas. 166 00:07:00,237 --> 00:07:02,370 Ah, las manzanas. 167 00:07:02,372 --> 00:07:03,371 S�, manzanas. 168 00:07:03,373 --> 00:07:05,273 Yeah. I'm in a groove. 169 00:07:05,275 --> 00:07:08,178 - You get the pi�atas for Sam's birthday. - Yeah. Yeah. 170 00:07:08,203 --> 00:07:09,811 Remember, Spanish only. 171 00:07:09,813 --> 00:07:11,479 Only Spanish. Yeah. 172 00:07:11,757 --> 00:07:13,724 Um. No... 173 00:07:13,749 --> 00:07:15,884 �Donde es were we? Uh... 174 00:07:15,886 --> 00:07:19,051 Lady, just tell me what you want. 175 00:07:19,076 --> 00:07:22,490 Espanola, uh, por favor. 176 00:07:22,492 --> 00:07:24,292 Quieres que te hablo en espa�ol. S�. 177 00:07:24,294 --> 00:07:28,842 Have you any, uh, Abuela Smiths? 178 00:07:33,606 --> 00:07:34,806 Hola. 179 00:07:34,831 --> 00:07:35,904 Hola, se�or. 180 00:07:35,906 --> 00:07:37,939 - Hola. - (CHUCKLES) Hola. 181 00:07:37,941 --> 00:07:40,408 Una pi�ata por favor. 182 00:07:40,410 --> 00:07:41,443 Ah, s�. 183 00:07:41,445 --> 00:07:43,078 �Cu�l quiere que le baje? 184 00:07:43,080 --> 00:07:44,849 Hola. 185 00:07:45,201 --> 00:07:46,348 Uh, hola. 186 00:07:46,350 --> 00:07:48,583 E, �que tipo? 187 00:07:48,585 --> 00:07:49,818 John. 188 00:07:49,820 --> 00:07:50,819 One. 189 00:07:50,821 --> 00:07:52,387 (CHUCKLES) "John Juan." 190 00:07:52,389 --> 00:07:56,658 E, �que tipo de pi�ata? 191 00:07:57,031 --> 00:07:58,764 Oh. Oh. 192 00:07:58,789 --> 00:08:01,696 My granddaughter is having a Princess and the Frog party. 193 00:08:01,698 --> 00:08:03,804 You got any frogs? 194 00:08:03,984 --> 00:08:04,803 �Fro...? 195 00:08:04,828 --> 00:08:06,334 Toads. 196 00:08:06,336 --> 00:08:07,617 Toad-o's? 197 00:08:07,851 --> 00:08:09,193 �Todas? 198 00:08:09,218 --> 00:08:11,006 S�, toad-a's. S�. 199 00:08:11,008 --> 00:08:13,003 No hay problema. Todas. 200 00:08:13,028 --> 00:08:13,842 (LAUGHS) 201 00:08:13,844 --> 00:08:16,077 (STAMMERS) 202 00:08:16,079 --> 00:08:17,946 Una mas, por favor. 203 00:08:17,948 --> 00:08:19,247 Um, um... 204 00:08:19,249 --> 00:08:20,849 Uh... Tiempo. 205 00:08:20,851 --> 00:08:23,467 (STAMMERS) �Tiempa? 206 00:08:23,492 --> 00:08:25,258 - �Tiempo? - JOHN: Joanie. 207 00:08:25,283 --> 00:08:28,484 Look what I got. I learned a new word: todos. 208 00:08:28,509 --> 00:08:29,858 It means "everything." 209 00:08:29,860 --> 00:08:31,626 - �Todos? - �Todos? 210 00:08:31,628 --> 00:08:33,628 O, S�. �Como no? 211 00:08:33,630 --> 00:08:35,730 - Todos... - No, no. No, n-no... 212 00:08:39,369 --> 00:08:41,002 That was awful. 213 00:08:41,004 --> 00:08:42,237 You know, I thought it was fun. 214 00:08:42,239 --> 00:08:44,739 I liked how tall I felt there. 215 00:08:44,741 --> 00:08:46,007 No, I don't know, John. 216 00:08:46,009 --> 00:08:49,033 How are we gonna survive another country 217 00:08:49,058 --> 00:08:52,574 when we can't even survive the farmers market in Burbank? 218 00:08:52,599 --> 00:08:54,198 Well, maybe Tyler was right. 219 00:08:54,223 --> 00:08:56,032 Maybe we should use our cell phones 220 00:08:56,057 --> 00:08:58,852 to translate, like everyone else. 221 00:08:58,877 --> 00:09:00,332 Yeah, but then, we'd have to learn 222 00:09:00,357 --> 00:09:02,391 how to use our cell phones. 223 00:09:02,416 --> 00:09:03,892 Well, I'm willing to do that. 224 00:09:03,894 --> 00:09:06,775 You know, it'd be an adventure, just like you want. 225 00:09:08,508 --> 00:09:10,065 All right. 226 00:09:10,067 --> 00:09:11,366 Okay, let's do it. 227 00:09:11,368 --> 00:09:13,422 Let's join the millennials. 228 00:09:13,837 --> 00:09:15,036 Get your coat. 229 00:09:15,038 --> 00:09:16,738 We're going to the app store. 230 00:09:16,740 --> 00:09:19,341 21st century, here we come. 231 00:09:19,366 --> 00:09:22,279 Boy, I hope they take checks. 232 00:09:26,177 --> 00:09:28,123 _ 233 00:09:29,193 --> 00:09:31,227 What is the deal? 234 00:09:31,229 --> 00:09:34,132 How long does it take to put our embryo in my sister's uterus? 235 00:09:34,157 --> 00:09:35,723 Well, if she parties like the rest of your family, 236 00:09:35,725 --> 00:09:37,091 she was probably hard to sedate. 237 00:09:37,093 --> 00:09:38,568 Look at this convertible. 238 00:09:38,593 --> 00:09:40,341 Ooh. I love that. Right? 239 00:09:40,366 --> 00:09:42,238 But there's no backseat for our new baby. 240 00:09:42,240 --> 00:09:44,863 And you know I need at least 20 cup holders. 241 00:09:44,888 --> 00:09:46,175 Hi. 242 00:09:46,177 --> 00:09:48,344 How'd it go? Is she pregnant? 243 00:09:48,346 --> 00:09:49,946 - She is. - Oh, I knew it! 244 00:09:49,948 --> 00:09:51,447 No. I mean, 245 00:09:51,449 --> 00:09:54,492 Rita was already pregnant when she came in today. 246 00:09:54,648 --> 00:09:55,818 - What? - What? 247 00:09:55,820 --> 00:09:57,753 Yes, I am so sorry. 248 00:09:57,755 --> 00:09:58,888 Um, she's still in the back, 249 00:09:58,890 --> 00:10:00,756 trying to figure out whose it is. 250 00:10:00,758 --> 00:10:02,458 You can see her if you want. 251 00:10:02,460 --> 00:10:04,293 I assume she's in a fragile state, 252 00:10:04,295 --> 00:10:06,529 and it would be wrong to yell at her? 253 00:10:06,531 --> 00:10:07,496 Yes. 254 00:10:07,498 --> 00:10:08,764 Then, no. 255 00:10:08,766 --> 00:10:10,099 I shouldn't see her right now. 256 00:10:10,101 --> 00:10:11,167 MATT: It's just that Rita 257 00:10:11,169 --> 00:10:12,835 was the only surrogate we could afford, 258 00:10:12,837 --> 00:10:15,004 because she was free, and she was down for whatever, 259 00:10:15,006 --> 00:10:17,406 which is probably how we ended up in this situation. 260 00:10:17,408 --> 00:10:19,442 You know what? I am gonna go yell at her. 261 00:10:19,444 --> 00:10:21,644 - It just feels like something I should do. - Yeah. 262 00:10:23,915 --> 00:10:25,047 You might want to close that door. 263 00:10:25,049 --> 00:10:26,875 COLLEEN: Rita! 264 00:10:26,900 --> 00:10:28,050 Too late. 265 00:10:31,101 --> 00:10:33,052 Maybe we should think about adoption. 266 00:10:33,077 --> 00:10:34,757 I don't know. I've just heard so many stories 267 00:10:34,759 --> 00:10:36,826 of last-minute disappointment. 268 00:10:36,828 --> 00:10:38,828 I don't think my heart could take it. 269 00:10:38,830 --> 00:10:41,530 Ugh. Okay, maybe we should just hit the pause button. 270 00:10:41,532 --> 00:10:43,065 Are you breaking up with me? 271 00:10:43,067 --> 00:10:44,767 What? No. 272 00:10:44,769 --> 00:10:47,436 No, I'm saying let's just take a moment for us. 273 00:10:47,438 --> 00:10:48,838 - Oh. - You know? 274 00:10:48,840 --> 00:10:50,906 Just really embrace the fact that, for right now, 275 00:10:50,908 --> 00:10:52,642 it's just you and me. 276 00:10:52,644 --> 00:10:53,976 And that we can use our experience 277 00:10:53,978 --> 00:10:56,012 to help other couples who are in the same position, 278 00:10:56,014 --> 00:10:58,381 and really focus and dedicate ourselves 279 00:10:58,383 --> 00:11:00,783 to philanthropy and giving back. 280 00:11:00,785 --> 00:11:03,552 I have to have this car, I don't care how much it costs. 281 00:11:03,554 --> 00:11:05,655 We're gonna look so hot in it. 282 00:11:05,657 --> 00:11:07,556 - Fun, right? - Yeah. 283 00:11:07,558 --> 00:11:09,058 Everyone wants one of these babies. 284 00:11:09,060 --> 00:11:10,493 Ooh. (CHUCKLES) 285 00:11:10,495 --> 00:11:11,661 Uh, it's just a car. 286 00:11:11,663 --> 00:11:13,462 Let's just call it a car. 287 00:11:13,464 --> 00:11:15,598 The fact is, it's not "just a car," 288 00:11:15,600 --> 00:11:18,401 because something like this brings out the kid in us. 289 00:11:18,403 --> 00:11:19,391 And let's be honest, 290 00:11:19,416 --> 00:11:21,280 we've all got a kid inside of us. 291 00:11:21,305 --> 00:11:22,538 Yeah, some people don't need a kid 292 00:11:22,540 --> 00:11:24,040 inside of them to feel whole. 293 00:11:24,042 --> 00:11:25,608 - That's right. - Excuse me. 294 00:11:25,610 --> 00:11:27,743 - I'm gonna go get another doughnut. - Okay. 295 00:11:27,745 --> 00:11:29,512 You know what? It's actually one per customer, 296 00:11:29,514 --> 00:11:31,747 but, uh, well, that'll count as yours. 297 00:11:31,749 --> 00:11:33,449 Yeah, uh, hey, listen, man. We're having some, um, 298 00:11:33,451 --> 00:11:35,918 baby trouble, so if you could just dance around 299 00:11:35,920 --> 00:11:37,853 - any sensitive subjects. - Yes. 300 00:11:37,855 --> 00:11:39,922 - Got it. Mum's the word. Oh. - Ooh. 301 00:11:39,924 --> 00:11:41,524 - But I'll-I'll do better. - Okay. 302 00:11:41,526 --> 00:11:43,025 - Yeah. - Hmm. 303 00:11:44,095 --> 00:11:45,161 Have a seat. 304 00:11:45,163 --> 00:11:46,929 Thank you. 305 00:11:47,856 --> 00:11:48,931 J.P.: Uhp. 306 00:11:48,933 --> 00:11:50,099 Uh... 307 00:11:50,101 --> 00:11:52,435 Ha. Yep. These, 308 00:11:52,437 --> 00:11:53,869 uh... 309 00:11:55,270 --> 00:11:58,074 The, uh, pictures that come with the frames. 310 00:11:58,076 --> 00:11:59,208 But you're in that one. 311 00:11:59,210 --> 00:12:00,509 Hmm? 312 00:12:00,511 --> 00:12:04,914 Oh. Well, I used to be a frame model. 313 00:12:04,916 --> 00:12:06,215 (SOFT LAUGHTER) 314 00:12:06,217 --> 00:12:08,818 You guys came to the right place, because this baby... 315 00:12:08,820 --> 00:12:10,425 I mean, car... 316 00:12:10,450 --> 00:12:13,022 goes zero to 60 in five seconds. 317 00:12:13,024 --> 00:12:14,625 Wow. And the handling 318 00:12:14,650 --> 00:12:19,024 is as smooth as a... full-grown adult's bottom, 319 00:12:19,049 --> 00:12:20,596 is what we like to say. 320 00:12:21,025 --> 00:12:24,800 So, uh, when do we talk about financing? 321 00:12:24,802 --> 00:12:26,702 Yes, financing, absolutely. Maria? 322 00:12:26,704 --> 00:12:28,898 - This is so exciting, right? - I know, it is. This really is. 323 00:12:28,923 --> 00:12:30,139 Time to talk numbers? 324 00:12:30,890 --> 00:12:32,068 Never mind. 325 00:12:32,093 --> 00:12:33,142 Hmm. 326 00:12:33,144 --> 00:12:35,111 (EXHALES) 327 00:12:35,113 --> 00:12:36,912 It's a gluten allergy. It's sad. 328 00:12:36,914 --> 00:12:37,947 Oh. 329 00:12:37,949 --> 00:12:39,115 (ENGINE STARTS) 330 00:12:39,117 --> 00:12:41,350 - All right, we did it. - Oh. 331 00:12:41,836 --> 00:12:43,606 Yeah. 332 00:12:44,288 --> 00:12:45,575 Here we go. 333 00:12:45,600 --> 00:12:47,890 Congratulations, you guys, you're looking good. 334 00:12:47,892 --> 00:12:49,225 Can't let you leave, though, 335 00:12:49,227 --> 00:12:51,060 without a picture for the website. 336 00:12:52,314 --> 00:12:53,863 - Okay. - Okay. 337 00:12:56,467 --> 00:12:58,000 All right. 338 00:12:58,002 --> 00:12:59,828 Ho-ho, looking good. 339 00:12:59,853 --> 00:13:00,636 (CAMERA PHONE CLICKS) 340 00:13:00,638 --> 00:13:01,837 I'll tell you what, I think you got 341 00:13:01,839 --> 00:13:03,105 a really good deal on this car. 342 00:13:03,107 --> 00:13:04,473 And our policy is, 343 00:13:04,475 --> 00:13:06,695 if you find a better price in nine months, 344 00:13:06,720 --> 00:13:08,219 th-then... ugh. 345 00:13:08,244 --> 00:13:09,345 Just... 346 00:13:09,347 --> 00:13:11,914 enjoy the car, and we'll see you for your first service, 347 00:13:11,916 --> 00:13:16,064 which includes labor and delivery... oh, my God! 348 00:13:18,198 --> 00:13:20,956 (SIGHS) 349 00:13:22,207 --> 00:13:24,002 I wish we had a baby. 350 00:13:24,742 --> 00:13:26,323 I know. Me, too. 351 00:13:27,299 --> 00:13:28,597 You know what? What are we doing here? 352 00:13:28,599 --> 00:13:31,961 This car isn't gonna make us feel any better. 353 00:13:33,343 --> 00:13:36,071 You know what? We'll find something that will. 354 00:13:36,468 --> 00:13:38,941 In the meantime, we're gonna give back this stupid car, 355 00:13:38,943 --> 00:13:40,342 because unless you've driven it off the lot, 356 00:13:40,344 --> 00:13:41,744 you don't have to pay for it, okay? 357 00:13:41,746 --> 00:13:43,750 - Okay. I love... - I love you so much. 358 00:13:43,775 --> 00:13:44,908 - Okay. - We're gonna be fine. 359 00:13:44,933 --> 00:13:46,115 - We're gonna be just fine. - Yeah. 360 00:13:46,117 --> 00:13:47,616 (TIRES SCREECHING) 361 00:13:47,618 --> 00:13:50,719 (ALARM BEEPING) 362 00:13:52,316 --> 00:13:54,623 Well, technically, we didn't drive it off the lot, 363 00:13:54,625 --> 00:13:56,929 so it's not really on us. 364 00:14:02,116 --> 00:14:04,128 _ 365 00:14:04,427 --> 00:14:06,260 GREG: Yeah, sure. Yeah. 366 00:14:06,285 --> 00:14:08,785 I-I love you, too. Bye. 367 00:14:08,810 --> 00:14:11,211 Um, okay, that was Heather. 368 00:14:13,136 --> 00:14:14,927 Matt and Colleen lost their surrogate. 369 00:14:14,952 --> 00:14:15,770 No. 370 00:14:15,813 --> 00:14:16,679 Yeah. 371 00:14:16,681 --> 00:14:17,947 Oh, that's so awful. 372 00:14:17,949 --> 00:14:20,616 - I feel so bad for them. - Yeah. 373 00:14:20,618 --> 00:14:22,318 Ugh, and I'm sure the last thing they want to hear 374 00:14:22,320 --> 00:14:23,386 is that I'm pregnant. 375 00:14:23,388 --> 00:14:25,506 Yeah. I mean, you know, 376 00:14:25,531 --> 00:14:27,531 Matt looks up to me so much as a little brother. 377 00:14:27,533 --> 00:14:31,368 When he finds out how potent I am, it will destroy him. 378 00:14:32,255 --> 00:14:34,771 - Yeah, that's gonna be a tough blow. - Well... 379 00:14:34,773 --> 00:14:37,441 Okay, you know what, let's just keep this a secret for now. 380 00:14:37,443 --> 00:14:41,645 Just... no one can know that I'm having a baby. 381 00:14:42,162 --> 00:14:45,029 Mommy, you're having a baby? 382 00:14:46,763 --> 00:14:49,831 Um... Lark, honey, what are you doing out of bed? 383 00:14:50,177 --> 00:14:53,135 Mommy, do you have a baby in your tummy? 384 00:14:55,749 --> 00:14:58,390 - You... Come here, sweetie. - (SIGHS) 385 00:14:59,531 --> 00:15:01,264 - Yeah. - (STRAINED GRUNT) 386 00:15:02,062 --> 00:15:04,350 So, um, yes. 387 00:15:04,375 --> 00:15:06,600 Mommy has a baby in her tummy. 388 00:15:06,625 --> 00:15:08,739 (LAUGHS) Ooh! Isn't that exciting? 389 00:15:08,741 --> 00:15:11,708 You are gonna be a big sister. Doesn't that sound like fun? 390 00:15:11,710 --> 00:15:13,443 No. 391 00:15:13,997 --> 00:15:15,345 But you don't think it would be fun 392 00:15:15,347 --> 00:15:16,980 to have a-a brother or sister 393 00:15:16,982 --> 00:15:19,149 so you don't, you know, end up weird? 394 00:15:19,174 --> 00:15:20,373 No. 395 00:15:21,941 --> 00:15:23,787 Wow, we're 0-for-2. 396 00:15:23,789 --> 00:15:26,189 Well, we've got some time to warm up to the idea. 397 00:15:26,191 --> 00:15:28,058 - Mm-hmm. - For now, honey, hey, 398 00:15:28,060 --> 00:15:29,359 let's just keep it a secret, right? 399 00:15:29,361 --> 00:15:31,028 'Cause we have Sam's party. 400 00:15:31,030 --> 00:15:33,997 Oh, yeah. Do you know what a secret is? 401 00:15:33,999 --> 00:15:38,258 Like when you forgot me in the car and said not to tell Mommy. 402 00:15:52,092 --> 00:15:53,383 Ooh. Hi. 403 00:15:53,385 --> 00:15:56,787 - Hi. I heard the news. - Huh? 404 00:15:56,789 --> 00:15:59,668 It's so exciting! Oh! Mwah! 405 00:15:59,693 --> 00:16:02,125 No, Mom. I think she knows. 406 00:16:02,127 --> 00:16:04,628 Yeah. Okay, Mom. Who told you? 407 00:16:04,630 --> 00:16:07,560 Lark. We were coloring together. 408 00:16:07,904 --> 00:16:09,699 It's a little disturbing. 409 00:16:09,701 --> 00:16:13,370 It started out as a heart, and then, you know, it... 410 00:16:13,948 --> 00:16:16,284 went off the rails there. 411 00:16:16,331 --> 00:16:18,010 Where is Lark? 412 00:16:21,862 --> 00:16:23,253 Honey, we just want to make sure 413 00:16:23,278 --> 00:16:24,944 that you're ready and that you're safe. 414 00:16:24,969 --> 00:16:27,219 Okay, you can get diseases. You could get pregnant. 415 00:16:27,244 --> 00:16:28,385 You could fall in love. 416 00:16:28,387 --> 00:16:31,288 And isn't that the scariest thing of all, Samantha? 417 00:16:31,290 --> 00:16:33,251 Wh-What are you doing, Tim? 418 00:16:33,276 --> 00:16:35,153 Trying to keep her a virgin. 419 00:16:35,178 --> 00:16:39,062 What? What's this? Some kind of weird sex toy? 420 00:16:39,064 --> 00:16:41,965 Dad! We've been dating for a year, 421 00:16:41,967 --> 00:16:43,767 and we're already in love. 422 00:16:43,769 --> 00:16:45,001 Just because you're in love, 423 00:16:45,003 --> 00:16:46,603 that doesn't mean that you're ready. 424 00:16:46,605 --> 00:16:49,473 Okay, I thought I was ready my first time. I wasn't. 425 00:16:49,475 --> 00:16:50,941 It's my decision. 426 00:16:50,943 --> 00:16:53,283 And I promise I'm not gonna get pregnant. 427 00:16:53,308 --> 00:16:54,945 LARK: Guess what. 428 00:16:54,947 --> 00:16:57,147 My mommy's pregnant. 429 00:16:59,066 --> 00:17:00,586 She calls the nanny "Mommy". 430 00:17:00,611 --> 00:17:02,087 Yeah. I'm fine with it. 431 00:17:07,026 --> 00:17:09,587 Ugh. She is a ticking time bomb. 432 00:17:09,612 --> 00:17:11,145 We have to keep her from saying anything. 433 00:17:11,147 --> 00:17:13,847 Okay. Okay. Um... Ooh, yeah. 434 00:17:14,085 --> 00:17:15,618 Come over here, kiddo. 435 00:17:15,643 --> 00:17:17,885 I want you to get on here and pedal around, 436 00:17:17,910 --> 00:17:20,644 silently, and remember our secret. 437 00:17:24,927 --> 00:17:25,993 Hi. 438 00:17:25,995 --> 00:17:28,595 - Guess what. - Wha...? 439 00:17:30,199 --> 00:17:31,895 Keep pedaling. 440 00:17:33,489 --> 00:17:37,270 You know, after two, baby fat's just fat. 441 00:17:37,907 --> 00:17:40,395 All right. Come on. Feel the burn. 442 00:17:44,780 --> 00:17:46,719 Okay. We just have to keep her eating 443 00:17:46,744 --> 00:17:48,615 - so she doesn't speak. - Mm-hmm. 444 00:17:48,617 --> 00:17:52,419 Mmm, this cake is so yummy. Huh? That's why we eat more and more. 445 00:17:52,421 --> 00:17:56,290 Yeah, we just stuff it in our cute little mouths all the time. 446 00:17:56,292 --> 00:17:57,991 - Mmm. - Mmm. 447 00:17:57,993 --> 00:18:00,094 He's really sending her mixed messages. 448 00:18:00,096 --> 00:18:01,695 - Mmm. - Mmm. 449 00:18:01,697 --> 00:18:02,629 (DOORBELL RINGS) 450 00:18:02,631 --> 00:18:04,631 Oh. I got it. 451 00:18:04,633 --> 00:18:07,501 No, no, no. I got it. Uh, excuse me. 452 00:18:08,938 --> 00:18:12,439 Hi, guys. I think that it's pretty obvious 453 00:18:12,441 --> 00:18:13,941 that there's something that everybody knows 454 00:18:13,943 --> 00:18:15,642 but no one is talking about. 455 00:18:15,644 --> 00:18:18,145 Uh, but Matt and I feel that having a baby is 456 00:18:18,147 --> 00:18:19,580 a really big decision 457 00:18:19,582 --> 00:18:22,058 that affects everyone in the family. 458 00:18:22,083 --> 00:18:24,618 We want to be open and honest. 459 00:18:25,393 --> 00:18:28,655 So that's why we wanted to share with you the exciting news 460 00:18:28,657 --> 00:18:30,090 that we are adopting. 461 00:18:30,092 --> 00:18:33,260 (CHEERING) 462 00:18:33,262 --> 00:18:35,188 - Wonderful! - Congratulations. 463 00:18:35,213 --> 00:18:36,530 Great. 464 00:18:36,532 --> 00:18:37,765 All right, uh, everyone, 465 00:18:37,767 --> 00:18:40,234 I would like for you all to meet Anthony. 466 00:18:42,569 --> 00:18:43,869 Hi. 467 00:18:44,926 --> 00:18:46,206 Oh, well, 468 00:18:46,208 --> 00:18:49,190 welcome to the family, dear. 469 00:18:49,215 --> 00:18:50,144 Welcome. 470 00:18:50,146 --> 00:18:52,546 Welcome to the family. 471 00:18:53,290 --> 00:18:55,734 Oh, I'm just the adoption agent, 472 00:18:55,759 --> 00:18:57,611 - and I'm 26. - ALL: Oh. 473 00:18:57,636 --> 00:18:59,720 Yeah, he's just here to confirm that we're a good family 474 00:18:59,722 --> 00:19:01,955 so he can match us with a baby that needs a home. 475 00:19:01,957 --> 00:19:04,858 Why don't you just take Mommy's baby? 476 00:19:05,661 --> 00:19:06,693 What? 477 00:19:09,507 --> 00:19:10,998 You're pregnant?! 478 00:19:11,000 --> 00:19:13,500 I am outraged! Whose is it? 479 00:19:13,502 --> 00:19:14,501 Greg. 480 00:19:14,991 --> 00:19:16,804 Yeah, okay. Um... 481 00:19:17,035 --> 00:19:19,039 We are pregnant. (CHUCKLES) 482 00:19:19,041 --> 00:19:21,690 - That's fantastic! - Babies for everyone. 483 00:19:21,715 --> 00:19:23,844 (CHEERING) 484 00:19:23,846 --> 00:19:25,979 I'm really sorry, Matt. I mean, we weren't even trying, 485 00:19:25,981 --> 00:19:28,882 like, at all, but... one time, so... 486 00:19:28,884 --> 00:19:30,978 That-That's really great, man. Congratulations. 487 00:19:31,003 --> 00:19:33,587 But you couldn't even let us have, like, one moment? 488 00:19:33,589 --> 00:19:35,189 Hey, man, listen. This isn't our fault. 489 00:19:35,191 --> 00:19:37,181 Lark wasn't supposed to tell anybody. 490 00:19:37,611 --> 00:19:38,425 MATT: Yeah, right. 491 00:19:38,427 --> 00:19:39,660 You totally put her up to it. 492 00:19:39,662 --> 00:19:40,690 You had her hold onto it 493 00:19:40,715 --> 00:19:41,823 until we had some good news, 494 00:19:41,848 --> 00:19:43,707 - then you told her to one-up us. - Oh, come on. 495 00:19:43,732 --> 00:19:46,066 You came here on a bus, and you smell like urine. 496 00:19:46,068 --> 00:19:49,613 How could I assume that that was gonna be followed by good news? 497 00:19:50,406 --> 00:19:52,238 - Wait. - What? 498 00:19:52,324 --> 00:19:53,207 Where's Sam and Ryan? 499 00:19:53,209 --> 00:19:54,141 (HEATHER GASPS) 500 00:19:54,143 --> 00:19:55,709 They're upstairs, unsupervised. 501 00:19:55,711 --> 00:19:57,744 Tim, how could you let this happen? 502 00:19:59,685 --> 00:20:01,619 It's like I don't even exist. 503 00:20:02,082 --> 00:20:04,284 Don't worry. This is a very loving 504 00:20:04,286 --> 00:20:06,687 - and supportive family. - Mm-hmm. 505 00:20:06,689 --> 00:20:08,522 Would you like to hear a song about our journey? 506 00:20:08,524 --> 00:20:09,923 CLEMENTINE: Oh, yeah. Good idea. 507 00:20:09,925 --> 00:20:11,425 Let's do it. 508 00:20:11,427 --> 00:20:12,695 Oh, boy. Okay. 509 00:20:12,720 --> 00:20:14,394 (OVERLAPPING CHATTER) 510 00:20:14,396 --> 00:20:17,130 - Hey. Sorry about that, man. - No, I'm sorry. 511 00:20:17,132 --> 00:20:19,566 ("LISTEN TO THE MUSIC" BY THE DOOBIE BROTHERS PLAYING) 512 00:20:21,971 --> 00:20:23,837 Hey... 513 00:20:24,203 --> 00:20:27,674 Why are we searching for adventure out in the world... 514 00:20:27,676 --> 00:20:31,678 when we have all the adventure we need right here? 515 00:20:31,680 --> 00:20:33,515 They're gone, they're gone, they're gone. They took off! 516 00:20:33,540 --> 00:20:35,558 Check the tiny house. Check the tiny house. 517 00:20:35,583 --> 00:20:36,950 It's a palace of lust. 518 00:20:36,952 --> 00:20:39,238 - Let's go. This way! - Yeah. 519 00:20:39,263 --> 00:20:41,397 ? Some are happy... ? 520 00:20:41,422 --> 00:20:44,943 Siri, how do you say "I love my wife" in Spanish? 521 00:20:44,968 --> 00:20:45,734 (CHIME) 522 00:20:45,759 --> 00:20:47,895 SIRI: Turn right on Mills Boulevard. 523 00:20:47,897 --> 00:20:48,996 (BOTH LAUGH) 524 00:20:48,998 --> 00:20:52,437 ? Oh... listen to the music. ? 525 00:20:52,461 --> 00:20:53,761 Synced and corrected by Octavia - www.addic7ed.com - 526 00:20:53,811 --> 00:20:58,361 Repair and Synchronization by Easy Subtitles Synchronizer 1.0.0.0 36663

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