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1
00:00:01,491 --> 00:00:02,591
Jesus, Jim. Push it down!
2
00:00:02,592 --> 00:00:04,459
Billy, you're being a
pain in the ass today.
3
00:00:04,460 --> 00:00:06,762
I'm sorry, Jim, but you're
leaving and I can't move the
4
00:00:06,763 --> 00:00:08,897
pillow myself, so I want to make it right.
5
00:00:08,898 --> 00:00:09,464
I'm sorry.
6
00:00:09,465 --> 00:00:11,466
I know... I know this sucks for you.
7
00:00:11,467 --> 00:00:13,902
Gee, thanks, Jim. Thanks for
mentioning it, it does suck.
8
00:00:13,903 --> 00:00:15,136
Look, how is it now?
9
00:00:15,137 --> 00:00:15,970
It's good.
10
00:00:15,971 --> 00:00:17,406
I'm sorry for being a Dick.
11
00:00:17,407 --> 00:00:19,708
Where's Ramona, anyway?
She's never here anymore.
12
00:00:19,709 --> 00:00:21,610
Oh, I gave her the afternoon off.
13
00:00:21,611 --> 00:00:23,133
You know, she's still
dating that Eddie kid...
14
00:00:23,146 --> 00:00:24,679
you know, the personal trainer?
15
00:00:24,680 --> 00:00:25,781
Dude's like 300 pounds now.
16
00:00:25,782 --> 00:00:27,482
Do you ever picture them having sex?
17
00:00:27,483 --> 00:00:27,849
No!
18
00:00:27,850 --> 00:00:30,018
Like just two big blobs just
smashing into each other?
19
00:00:30,019 --> 00:00:30,552
Shut up.
20
00:00:30,553 --> 00:00:31,352
Who? Who's that?
21
00:00:31,353 --> 00:00:31,853
Ramona.
22
00:00:31,854 --> 00:00:32,987
And that fat shit, Eddie.
23
00:00:32,988 --> 00:00:34,389
Oh, my God! That's disgusting.
24
00:00:34,390 --> 00:00:36,257
That's like a mudslide
doing it with the shmoo.
25
00:00:36,258 --> 00:00:37,058
[ Doorbell rings ]
26
00:00:37,059 --> 00:00:37,959
What's the "shmoo"?
27
00:00:37,960 --> 00:00:38,894
You don't know the shmoo?
28
00:00:38,895 --> 00:00:39,561
[ Laughing ] No.
29
00:00:39,562 --> 00:00:42,063
Man, you guys missed out.
30
00:00:42,064 --> 00:00:42,798
Hello?
31
00:00:42,799 --> 00:00:44,499
Hi.
32
00:00:44,500 --> 00:00:45,567
Can I help you?
33
00:00:45,568 --> 00:00:48,236
Is this where Jim jefferies lives?
34
00:00:48,237 --> 00:00:50,004
[ Laughs ]
35
00:00:50,005 --> 00:00:51,239
Yes.
36
00:00:51,240 --> 00:00:52,106
Yes, he does.
37
00:00:52,107 --> 00:00:52,841
[ Laughs ]
38
00:00:52,842 --> 00:00:55,182
Wait, wait.
39
00:00:55,311 --> 00:00:57,111
Hi.
40
00:00:57,480 --> 00:00:58,547
Well...
41
00:00:58,548 --> 00:01:00,248
You know, I had a good run.
42
00:01:00,249 --> 00:01:02,751
This was... this was gonna
happen sooner or later.
43
00:01:02,752 --> 00:01:03,919
What?
44
00:01:03,920 --> 00:01:04,953
You're pregnant.
45
00:01:04,954 --> 00:01:06,421
Yes, I am.
46
00:01:06,422 --> 00:01:08,523
Yes, she is.
47
00:01:08,524 --> 00:01:09,925
Ah, look, I gotta be honest.
48
00:01:09,926 --> 00:01:11,993
I don't even really remember us having...
49
00:01:11,994 --> 00:01:15,430
I'm a blackout drunk, so I don't...
I don't remember us having sex.
50
00:01:15,431 --> 00:01:16,998
No, we never...
51
00:01:16,999 --> 00:01:18,166
[ Chuckling ] We never did.
52
00:01:18,167 --> 00:01:19,067
[ Snaps fingers ]
53
00:01:19,068 --> 00:01:19,734
It's Steve's!
54
00:01:19,735 --> 00:01:20,669
Uh, she's pretty hot.
55
00:01:20,670 --> 00:01:21,870
I think I'd remember doing that.
56
00:01:21,871 --> 00:01:22,370
Thanks!
57
00:01:22,371 --> 00:01:23,505
Besides, I had a vasectomy!
58
00:01:23,506 --> 00:01:25,106
How many times do I have to tell you this?
59
00:01:25,107 --> 00:01:26,274
He did. He's had a vasectomy.
60
00:01:26,275 --> 00:01:28,076
He hasn't had sex for like nine months!
61
00:01:28,077 --> 00:01:29,177
It's not his baby.
62
00:01:29,178 --> 00:01:30,679
What are you even here for?
63
00:01:30,680 --> 00:01:31,446
[ Gasps ]
64
00:01:31,447 --> 00:01:32,013
Wendy.
65
00:01:32,014 --> 00:01:32,914
Hi, Billy.
66
00:01:32,915 --> 00:01:34,048
Who's... Wendy?
67
00:01:34,049 --> 00:01:35,550
Who's... what's Wendy?
68
00:01:35,551 --> 00:01:37,218
Wendy's my first love from Vegas.
69
00:01:37,219 --> 00:01:38,119
[ Snaps fingers ]
70
00:01:38,120 --> 00:01:40,054
The Hooker from Vegas! Yes!
71
00:01:40,055 --> 00:01:41,990
I'm not a Hooker anymore.
72
00:01:41,991 --> 00:01:42,924
Well...
73
00:01:42,925 --> 00:01:44,125
Not like that, you can't.
74
00:01:44,126 --> 00:01:45,927
That would be paying for a threesome.
75
00:01:45,928 --> 00:01:46,461
Wait.
76
00:01:46,462 --> 00:01:48,997
What the hell are you doing here?
77
00:01:48,998 --> 00:01:51,938
Billy's the father.
78
00:01:54,871 --> 00:01:57,792
- Yeah?
- Yeah.
79
00:01:57,817 --> 00:02:01,699
Sync & corrections by No1
www.addic7ed.com
80
00:02:01,723 --> 00:02:03,323
Wendy.
81
00:02:05,455 --> 00:02:07,422
You having a hard time getting comfortable?
82
00:02:07,423 --> 00:02:08,523
Yeah.
83
00:02:08,524 --> 00:02:09,558
I'm just so big.
84
00:02:09,559 --> 00:02:10,626
Yeah, you are.
85
00:02:10,627 --> 00:02:13,495
I have a hard time getting
comfortable, too.
86
00:02:13,496 --> 00:02:14,563
Yeah, really? Why?
87
00:02:14,564 --> 00:02:15,731
Because I can't move.
88
00:02:15,732 --> 00:02:16,465
Oh, right.
89
00:02:16,466 --> 00:02:19,635
Okay, I have a few questions here
that just need to be answered.
90
00:02:19,636 --> 00:02:20,870
I want to hear the details.
91
00:02:20,871 --> 00:02:22,537
Okay, you only had a blowjob, right?
92
00:02:22,538 --> 00:02:24,339
She can't get pregnant from a blowjob!
93
00:02:24,340 --> 00:02:25,674
That's not all we did.
94
00:02:25,675 --> 00:02:26,842
Really? What else?
95
00:02:26,843 --> 00:02:28,644
And you didn't wear a condom?
96
00:02:28,645 --> 00:02:32,481
Well, Billy's so huge, the condom broke.
97
00:02:32,482 --> 00:02:33,215
Wow, Billy.
98
00:02:33,216 --> 00:02:35,017
You know, sex could have killed you.
99
00:02:35,018 --> 00:02:36,919
I told you I wanted to feel a vagina.
100
00:02:36,920 --> 00:02:37,753
Yeah, he did.
101
00:02:37,754 --> 00:02:39,588
And he's so huge.
102
00:02:39,589 --> 00:02:40,923
That's how I remember him.
103
00:02:40,924 --> 00:02:43,092
She remembered me because
I got a huge cock.
104
00:02:43,093 --> 00:02:44,260
Yes!
105
00:02:44,261 --> 00:02:45,394
I heard her, Billy.
106
00:02:45,395 --> 00:02:46,461
Hello! I'm here!
107
00:02:46,462 --> 00:02:47,496
Open up! It's me!
108
00:02:47,497 --> 00:02:48,230
Oh, God.
109
00:02:48,231 --> 00:02:49,064
[ Laughs ]
110
00:02:49,065 --> 00:02:50,565
Oh, great. Hi.
111
00:02:50,566 --> 00:02:53,969
Billy, I don't think I can pick up
these medical supplies anymore.
112
00:02:53,970 --> 00:02:57,439
Your father's back, and then my
Mother's getting sick, and...
113
00:02:57,440 --> 00:02:59,660
[ Laughs ]
114
00:03:00,143 --> 00:03:02,244
Ah! There is a God.
115
00:03:02,245 --> 00:03:03,879
Well, Jim...
116
00:03:03,880 --> 00:03:07,082
Oh, this is so unexpected.
117
00:03:07,083 --> 00:03:11,253
You know, with you throwing your seed
around like a farmer on a field.
118
00:03:11,254 --> 00:03:12,354
Oh, I'm so sorry.
119
00:03:12,355 --> 00:03:15,991
I don't mean to be inappropriate,
but congratulations.
120
00:03:15,992 --> 00:03:16,792
Thank you.
121
00:03:16,793 --> 00:03:18,227
Janice, I'm really happy...
122
00:03:18,228 --> 00:03:19,494
So am I.
123
00:03:19,495 --> 00:03:21,396
To tell you...
124
00:03:21,397 --> 00:03:23,565
It's not mine.
125
00:03:23,566 --> 00:03:26,601
Oh, my God. No, Steve!
126
00:03:26,602 --> 00:03:27,069
Mom!
127
00:03:27,070 --> 00:03:30,439
Well, you're gonna give me another
grandchild that I don't see?
128
00:03:30,440 --> 00:03:32,208
You are such an asshole!
129
00:03:32,209 --> 00:03:34,409
The baby is not mine.
130
00:03:34,410 --> 00:03:35,044
Rodney's?
131
00:03:35,045 --> 00:03:37,379
Yeah, it's mentally
challenged Rodney's baby.
132
00:03:37,380 --> 00:03:38,380
So disgusting.
133
00:03:38,381 --> 00:03:41,016
I know mentally challenged Rodney!
134
00:03:41,017 --> 00:03:42,918
You know Rodney?
135
00:03:42,919 --> 00:03:44,019
Yeah, he's really nice.
136
00:03:44,020 --> 00:03:46,155
[ Imitating Rodney ] I'm
gonna put it in ya!
137
00:03:46,156 --> 00:03:47,256
I'm gonna kill him.
138
00:03:47,257 --> 00:03:49,158
That's him!
139
00:03:49,159 --> 00:03:50,860
The baby's mine, Mom.
140
00:03:50,861 --> 00:03:52,561
[ Imitates explosion ]
141
00:03:52,562 --> 00:03:53,795
Billy!
142
00:03:53,796 --> 00:03:54,363
But...
143
00:03:54,364 --> 00:03:55,064
[ Laughs ]
144
00:03:55,065 --> 00:03:56,098
How did this happen?
145
00:03:56,099 --> 00:03:59,068
You know when you said it was a
bad idea for me and Steve to
146
00:03:59,069 --> 00:04:01,237
take Billy to Vegas to see a prostitute?
147
00:04:01,238 --> 00:04:03,339
Well, turns out you're right, grandma.
148
00:04:03,340 --> 00:04:04,073
Jim, stop it.
149
00:04:04,074 --> 00:04:04,606
Oh, God.
150
00:04:04,607 --> 00:04:05,841
You have to take some blame.
151
00:04:05,842 --> 00:04:09,311
None of this would have happened if Billy
died in Vegas like he said he would.
152
00:04:09,312 --> 00:04:10,645
Oh, my God.
153
00:04:10,646 --> 00:04:11,780
What did I do?
154
00:04:11,781 --> 00:04:13,548
[ Sobbing ] What did I do?
155
00:04:13,549 --> 00:04:15,889
[ Chuckles ]
156
00:04:18,889 --> 00:04:20,389
A Hooker-r-r-r!!
157
00:04:20,390 --> 00:04:21,656
[ Laughing ] That's Janice.
158
00:04:21,657 --> 00:04:23,692
She's available for
babysitting, so that's handy.
159
00:04:23,693 --> 00:04:24,894
You have someone in the area.
160
00:04:24,895 --> 00:04:26,461
You know, you can just drop him off.
161
00:04:26,462 --> 00:04:27,363
Whoa, whoa, whoa.
162
00:04:27,364 --> 00:04:29,365
What do you have to say
for yourself, Mister?
163
00:04:29,366 --> 00:04:30,032
Huh?
164
00:04:30,033 --> 00:04:32,001
I'm kind of excited.
165
00:04:32,002 --> 00:04:32,768
Really?
166
00:04:32,769 --> 00:04:33,302
Yes!
167
00:04:33,303 --> 00:04:35,771
A permanently disabled man and a Hooker?!
168
00:04:35,772 --> 00:04:36,305
Mom!
169
00:04:36,306 --> 00:04:37,572
Oh, shut up, Steve!
170
00:04:37,573 --> 00:04:40,142
And if you say anything,
I'm gonna slap you.
171
00:04:40,143 --> 00:04:41,877
I'm on your side!
172
00:04:41,878 --> 00:04:43,312
Look at the positives, okay?
173
00:04:43,313 --> 00:04:45,381
If it's a boy, you can give it a tent.
174
00:04:45,382 --> 00:04:46,181
Jim, don't.
175
00:04:46,182 --> 00:04:47,716
And if it's a girl...
176
00:04:47,717 --> 00:04:48,250
[ Slap ]
177
00:04:48,251 --> 00:04:48,984
Mom! Mom!
178
00:04:48,985 --> 00:04:49,518
Mom!
179
00:04:49,519 --> 00:04:50,652
Mom, Mom, Mom, Mom.
180
00:04:50,653 --> 00:04:51,586
Okay.
181
00:04:51,587 --> 00:04:52,254
Yeah.
182
00:04:52,255 --> 00:04:53,155
[ Laughs ]
183
00:04:53,156 --> 00:04:56,591
Oh, I've been wanting to
do that for years, Jim.
184
00:04:56,592 --> 00:04:58,160
Mother, please.
185
00:04:58,161 --> 00:04:59,361
Please what?!
186
00:04:59,362 --> 00:05:01,797
Who's gonna take care of this baby, huh?
187
00:05:01,798 --> 00:05:02,531
You?!
188
00:05:02,532 --> 00:05:03,665
Oh, and me.
189
00:05:03,666 --> 00:05:05,567
He can't even wipe his own ass!
190
00:05:05,568 --> 00:05:06,802
I don't really mind.
191
00:05:06,803 --> 00:05:08,137
I can help him with that.
192
00:05:08,138 --> 00:05:08,904
Helpful.
193
00:05:08,905 --> 00:05:10,372
Oh, God. Take me now.
194
00:05:10,373 --> 00:05:11,307
[ Laughs ]
195
00:05:11,308 --> 00:05:12,541
He's not gonna help you!
196
00:05:12,542 --> 00:05:16,211
Who's gonna pay for this baby...
her hooking?
197
00:05:16,212 --> 00:05:17,379
I can't! I quit.
198
00:05:17,380 --> 00:05:18,580
Billy could hook!
199
00:05:18,581 --> 00:05:21,150
He's on many people's bucket list.
200
00:05:21,151 --> 00:05:22,751
I've had this idea for years.
201
00:05:22,752 --> 00:05:23,986
"Bucket list hookers."
202
00:05:23,987 --> 00:05:24,886
[ Mutters ]
203
00:05:24,887 --> 00:05:27,489
Hey, Mom, Mom, Mom, Mom,
Mom, Mom, Mom, Mom!
204
00:05:27,490 --> 00:05:28,157
That's it.
205
00:05:28,158 --> 00:05:30,259
You better take a paternity test.
206
00:05:30,260 --> 00:05:32,995
Yeah, I've got two idiots as sons.
207
00:05:32,996 --> 00:05:35,797
And I have a husband who sleeps in a tent.
208
00:05:35,798 --> 00:05:37,866
Well, I think that idea's a winner.
209
00:05:37,867 --> 00:05:38,834
Wendy?
210
00:05:38,835 --> 00:05:39,701
Yeah?
211
00:05:39,702 --> 00:05:40,869
Can we have sex?
212
00:05:40,870 --> 00:05:41,503
Sure.
213
00:05:41,504 --> 00:05:42,471
Great idea.
214
00:05:42,472 --> 00:05:43,405
Yeah, it is.
215
00:05:43,406 --> 00:05:45,975
But you have to wear a condom this time.
216
00:05:45,976 --> 00:05:46,775
Why's that?
217
00:05:46,776 --> 00:05:48,743
Because I don't want twins, silly.
218
00:05:48,744 --> 00:05:50,946
See? Thoughtful.
219
00:05:50,947 --> 00:05:51,546
Billy.
220
00:05:51,547 --> 00:05:52,047
What?
221
00:05:52,048 --> 00:05:53,215
How's she look naked?
222
00:05:53,216 --> 00:05:54,049
Steve, stop it.
223
00:05:54,050 --> 00:05:55,050
[ Exhales deeply ]
224
00:05:55,051 --> 00:05:56,051
I love pregnant women.
225
00:05:56,052 --> 00:05:57,987
Okay, y-you're crossing into "creepy" now.
226
00:05:57,988 --> 00:05:59,855
Well, pregnant sex is awesome, isn't it?
227
00:05:59,856 --> 00:06:00,622
I don't know.
228
00:06:00,623 --> 00:06:01,390
I've never done it.
229
00:06:01,391 --> 00:06:03,592
Can you imagine Billy having
sex with her with his cock?
230
00:06:03,593 --> 00:06:05,094
That kid's head's gonna be smashed.
231
00:06:05,095 --> 00:06:06,061
[ Laughing ] Awesome.
232
00:06:06,062 --> 00:06:08,364
Yeah, I have to say it was pretty great.
233
00:06:08,365 --> 00:06:09,664
[ Exhales deeply ]
234
00:06:09,665 --> 00:06:12,134
I have to go to the bathroom all the time.
235
00:06:12,135 --> 00:06:13,768
Oh, wow.
236
00:06:13,769 --> 00:06:15,904
Jim, hit Steve.
237
00:06:15,905 --> 00:06:16,438
W-what?
238
00:06:16,439 --> 00:06:17,373
Stop it, creeper.
239
00:06:17,374 --> 00:06:18,307
You're getting weird.
240
00:06:18,308 --> 00:06:20,442
I think it's cute how he
likes pregnant ladies.
241
00:06:20,443 --> 00:06:21,943
Wanda wenderson?
242
00:06:21,944 --> 00:06:23,924
Wendy.
243
00:06:25,148 --> 00:06:27,116
Her name is Wanda.
244
00:06:27,117 --> 00:06:31,553
That's the greatest
white-trash name of them all.
245
00:06:31,554 --> 00:06:32,988
Do you...
246
00:06:32,989 --> 00:06:33,822
All need to be here?
247
00:06:33,823 --> 00:06:35,491
Well, we're all involved in this.
248
00:06:35,492 --> 00:06:38,560
Not physically, but, you
know, supporting...
249
00:06:38,561 --> 00:06:39,428
Takes a village.
250
00:06:39,429 --> 00:06:40,562
This okay with you?
251
00:06:40,563 --> 00:06:41,730
Oh, yeah. It's fine.
252
00:06:41,731 --> 00:06:42,498
All right.
253
00:06:42,499 --> 00:06:44,866
Let's get going.
254
00:06:44,867 --> 00:06:47,036
Whice of you would be the father?
255
00:06:47,037 --> 00:06:49,317
Oh, I am.
256
00:06:50,140 --> 00:06:50,705
Oh.
257
00:06:50,706 --> 00:06:51,907
[ Chuckles lightly ]
258
00:06:51,908 --> 00:06:52,607
Congrats.
259
00:06:52,608 --> 00:06:53,608
Thanks, man.
260
00:06:53,609 --> 00:06:56,245
And how many partners have you been with?
261
00:06:56,246 --> 00:06:56,978
Uh, three?
262
00:06:56,979 --> 00:06:58,080
I-I bought you three.
263
00:06:58,081 --> 00:07:00,049
I got you the blowjob on your birthday.
264
00:07:00,050 --> 00:07:00,549
Four.
265
00:07:00,550 --> 00:07:01,783
Oh, right, right, right.
266
00:07:01,784 --> 00:07:04,186
Four... uh, two blowjobs and two vaginals.
267
00:07:04,187 --> 00:07:04,886
Two vaginals?
268
00:07:04,887 --> 00:07:06,088
Billy, that's gonna kill you.
269
00:07:06,089 --> 00:07:08,957
That's true, so four blowjobs, two
vaginals, but four total people.
270
00:07:08,958 --> 00:07:09,658
Write that down.
271
00:07:09,659 --> 00:07:10,659
I want credit for that.
272
00:07:10,660 --> 00:07:11,927
Four blowjobs, two vaginals.
273
00:07:11,928 --> 00:07:13,128
And he gave him a hand-job.
274
00:07:13,129 --> 00:07:13,628
Well...
275
00:07:13,629 --> 00:07:14,596
That doesn't count.
276
00:07:14,597 --> 00:07:15,230
Mom walked in.
277
00:07:15,231 --> 00:07:15,597
Stop.
278
00:07:15,598 --> 00:07:16,465
Yeah, that was...
279
00:07:16,466 --> 00:07:17,666
Okay, we'll just say three.
280
00:07:17,667 --> 00:07:18,133
Okay.
281
00:07:18,134 --> 00:07:19,101
Collectively, three.
282
00:07:19,102 --> 00:07:19,535
Yeah.
283
00:07:19,536 --> 00:07:20,001
Cool.
284
00:07:20,002 --> 00:07:20,536
And Mom?
285
00:07:20,537 --> 00:07:22,438
Um, none in the last three months...
286
00:07:22,439 --> 00:07:23,172
Okay, none.
287
00:07:23,173 --> 00:07:25,006
But before that...
288
00:07:25,007 --> 00:07:29,311
Uh, four... a day, five times
a week, so that would be...
289
00:07:29,312 --> 00:07:29,844
1, 2...
290
00:07:29,845 --> 00:07:33,482
I find it's easier if you carry
the one when I'm counting it out.
291
00:07:33,483 --> 00:07:34,183
Oh, okay.
292
00:07:34,184 --> 00:07:35,284
Figure a way to...
293
00:07:35,285 --> 00:07:37,119
Did you want me to go back further?
294
00:07:37,120 --> 00:07:38,587
No! No, I...
295
00:07:38,588 --> 00:07:40,556
Doctor, she's a prostitute.
296
00:07:40,557 --> 00:07:43,092
Yeah, I kind of gathered that.
297
00:07:43,093 --> 00:07:45,594
Okay, I'm gonna run some tests.
298
00:07:45,595 --> 00:07:46,928
Uh, what test?
299
00:07:46,929 --> 00:07:48,130
All of them.
300
00:07:48,131 --> 00:07:49,398
Probably wise.
301
00:07:49,399 --> 00:07:50,399
Come on, Janice.
302
00:07:50,400 --> 00:07:51,166
Steve sent me.
303
00:07:51,167 --> 00:07:53,001
Oh, of course he did.
304
00:07:53,002 --> 00:07:54,035
[ Chuckles ]
305
00:07:54,036 --> 00:07:55,237
Hey, Walter!
306
00:07:55,238 --> 00:07:59,678
You have raised such a pussy with Steve!
307
00:08:01,277 --> 00:08:02,578
Oh, hey, Jim.
308
00:08:02,579 --> 00:08:03,778
G'day, Walter.
309
00:08:03,779 --> 00:08:04,980
You want a beer?
310
00:08:04,981 --> 00:08:06,648
Yeah, yeah, I need a beer.
311
00:08:06,649 --> 00:08:07,782
Ah, put that back.
312
00:08:07,783 --> 00:08:09,485
I'm not taking your last beer.
313
00:08:09,486 --> 00:08:10,285
Suit yourself.
314
00:08:10,286 --> 00:08:10,986
Walter!
315
00:08:10,987 --> 00:08:11,520
Hmm?
316
00:08:11,521 --> 00:08:12,954
Billy's having a baby.
317
00:08:12,955 --> 00:08:13,788
My Billy?
318
00:08:13,789 --> 00:08:15,257
Yeah, wheelchair Billy.
319
00:08:15,258 --> 00:08:16,458
How'd that happen?
320
00:08:16,459 --> 00:08:17,659
With a prostitute.
321
00:08:17,660 --> 00:08:19,394
Having a baby with a prostitute.
322
00:08:19,395 --> 00:08:21,563
Well, there ya go.
323
00:08:21,564 --> 00:08:23,665
Who says you can't buy love, huh?
324
00:08:23,666 --> 00:08:24,366
[ Laughs ]
325
00:08:24,367 --> 00:08:25,033
Yeah.
326
00:08:25,034 --> 00:08:26,101
Does she know?
327
00:08:26,102 --> 00:08:26,735
Yeah.
328
00:08:26,736 --> 00:08:27,236
Yeah.
329
00:08:27,237 --> 00:08:29,104
That's why she's so pissed off.
330
00:08:29,105 --> 00:08:31,406
So I'm gonna go discuss this with Janice.
331
00:08:31,407 --> 00:08:34,767
You're a brave man, Jim.
332
00:08:34,877 --> 00:08:36,411
Good luck with that.
333
00:08:36,412 --> 00:08:38,480
Janice, it's your grandchild.
334
00:08:38,481 --> 00:08:39,448
Go away, Jim.
335
00:08:39,449 --> 00:08:40,982
One you can actually see.
336
00:08:40,983 --> 00:08:42,417
She's a nice girl, Janice.
337
00:08:42,418 --> 00:08:46,255
She's made a few mistakes in
her life, but we all have.
338
00:08:46,256 --> 00:08:48,690
You're gonna have to get along
with this girl if you're ever
339
00:08:48,691 --> 00:08:49,791
gonna see your grandchild.
340
00:08:49,792 --> 00:08:50,825
Look on the bright side.
341
00:08:50,826 --> 00:08:56,726
Even if it's a boy, you can dress
it like a girl like you did Steve.
342
00:08:57,634 --> 00:08:58,634
[ Birds of Tokyo's "lanterns"
343
00:08:58,635 --> 00:09:00,795
[ plays ]
344
00:09:09,045 --> 00:09:11,565
Go away, Jim.
345
00:09:16,852 --> 00:09:18,387
You can come out now, Walter.
346
00:09:18,388 --> 00:09:18,987
Uh-huh.
347
00:09:18,988 --> 00:09:21,490
She seems to have softened a bit.
348
00:09:21,491 --> 00:09:22,957
Thanks a lot, Jim.
349
00:09:22,958 --> 00:09:25,460
I've never seen her so mad.
350
00:09:25,461 --> 00:09:27,262
Could I see the ultrasound?
351
00:09:27,263 --> 00:09:28,096
Walter?
352
00:09:28,097 --> 00:09:31,132
Just, uh, pretend you can't hear her, Jim.
353
00:09:31,133 --> 00:09:32,000
Walter!!
354
00:09:32,001 --> 00:09:33,435
That's what I do.
355
00:09:33,436 --> 00:09:35,504
Oh, good-looking kid.
356
00:09:35,505 --> 00:09:36,938
Reminds me of my dad.
357
00:09:36,939 --> 00:09:37,772
Walter!
358
00:09:37,773 --> 00:09:38,674
[ Chuckles ]
359
00:09:38,675 --> 00:09:41,975
Mind if I hold onto it?
360
00:09:44,334 --> 00:09:46,945
- How about Alana?
- Well, I still like "Merlin".
361
00:09:47,116 --> 00:09:47,912
Me, too.
362
00:09:47,943 --> 00:09:48,910
"William Jr."
363
00:09:48,911 --> 00:09:50,645
Oh, hell, yeah.
364
00:09:50,646 --> 00:09:53,346
All right, stop.
365
00:09:53,348 --> 00:09:54,415
"Gout."
366
00:09:54,416 --> 00:09:55,149
What?
367
00:09:55,150 --> 00:09:56,651
Let it sit. Think about it.
368
00:09:56,652 --> 00:09:58,185
Gout nugent... he's a tough guy.
369
00:09:58,186 --> 00:09:58,953
[ Laughs ]
370
00:09:58,954 --> 00:10:01,689
You're not gonna pick a fight
with a guy called "gout."
371
00:10:01,690 --> 00:10:03,991
Gout's got a big Dick,
but he can fix things.
372
00:10:03,992 --> 00:10:05,392
He's a romantic, though.
373
00:10:05,393 --> 00:10:07,061
"Always buys flowers for girls"
374
00:10:07,062 --> 00:10:07,562
gout.
375
00:10:07,563 --> 00:10:11,943
There is my little baby carrier-r-r-r!
376
00:10:12,200 --> 00:10:12,834
Wow!
377
00:10:12,835 --> 00:10:13,501
Yeah.
378
00:10:13,502 --> 00:10:15,369
Thank you! They're so pretty.
379
00:10:15,370 --> 00:10:17,404
Oh, you're welcome.
380
00:10:17,405 --> 00:10:18,238
Baby carrier?
381
00:10:18,239 --> 00:10:18,906
Really, Mom?
382
00:10:18,907 --> 00:10:20,741
Well, she's carrying my grandchild.
383
00:10:20,742 --> 00:10:21,208
Yeah.
384
00:10:21,209 --> 00:10:22,944
So, is there anything that I can get you?
385
00:10:22,945 --> 00:10:23,978
Anything I can do for you?
386
00:10:23,979 --> 00:10:25,913
Uh, Steve, why don't you get her a pillow?
387
00:10:25,914 --> 00:10:27,348
I'm fine, Mrs. Nugent.
388
00:10:27,349 --> 00:10:29,817
Oh, you must call me "Mom."
389
00:10:29,818 --> 00:10:30,918
Wow, really?
390
00:10:30,919 --> 00:10:32,487
Yes, we're family now.
391
00:10:32,488 --> 00:10:33,354
[ Laughing ] I'm sorry.
392
00:10:33,355 --> 00:10:34,221
Who are you?
393
00:10:34,222 --> 00:10:35,389
What's happening, dude?
394
00:10:35,390 --> 00:10:36,657
[ Laughing ] I don't know.
395
00:10:36,658 --> 00:10:42,262
I-I just wanted to say that I'm
sorry for acting the way I did.
396
00:10:42,263 --> 00:10:44,164
I was just in shock with all the news.
397
00:10:44,165 --> 00:10:44,665
Wow.
398
00:10:44,666 --> 00:10:46,000
Do you have any family?
399
00:10:46,001 --> 00:10:47,368
No.
400
00:10:47,369 --> 00:10:48,369
You do now.
401
00:10:48,370 --> 00:10:49,303
[ Chuckles ]
402
00:10:49,304 --> 00:10:50,304
Oh, thanks.
403
00:10:50,305 --> 00:10:50,972
Okay.
404
00:10:50,973 --> 00:10:52,139
That's so nice.
405
00:10:52,140 --> 00:10:52,807
Okay.
406
00:10:52,808 --> 00:10:53,508
Okay.
407
00:10:53,509 --> 00:10:55,877
Do you know if it's a boy or girl?
408
00:10:55,878 --> 00:10:56,644
Oh, no.
409
00:10:56,645 --> 00:10:57,812
I'm old-fashioned.
410
00:10:57,813 --> 00:10:59,413
[ Laughs hysterically ]
411
00:10:59,414 --> 00:11:01,716
Oldest profession in the world.
412
00:11:01,717 --> 00:11:02,683
Really?
413
00:11:02,684 --> 00:11:03,551
It is!
414
00:11:03,552 --> 00:11:04,585
Oh, okay.
415
00:11:04,586 --> 00:11:07,688
We were just thinking of baby names.
416
00:11:07,689 --> 00:11:08,923
Oh, really?
417
00:11:08,924 --> 00:11:12,059
If it's a girl, "Molly,"
and it's a boy, "Merlin."
418
00:11:12,060 --> 00:11:13,127
That's right.
419
00:11:13,128 --> 00:11:15,295
How did you come up with "Merlin"?
420
00:11:15,296 --> 00:11:17,832
Merlin is the name of
Wendy's father, who died.
421
00:11:17,833 --> 00:11:18,733
Your father?
422
00:11:18,734 --> 00:11:19,567
Why not your father?
423
00:11:19,568 --> 00:11:22,202
Well, maybe because he lives in
a tent in his wife's backyard.
424
00:11:22,203 --> 00:11:23,470
Got a point.
425
00:11:23,471 --> 00:11:24,705
That is his choice!
426
00:11:24,706 --> 00:11:25,940
And he's not dead.
427
00:11:25,941 --> 00:11:27,474
Hey, what about my father?
428
00:11:27,475 --> 00:11:28,342
Is he dead?
429
00:11:28,343 --> 00:11:28,876
Yes!
430
00:11:28,877 --> 00:11:30,511
Your father isn't that great.
431
00:11:30,512 --> 00:11:31,078
Yeah.
432
00:11:31,079 --> 00:11:32,647
My father was a Saint!
433
00:11:32,648 --> 00:11:33,848
Aw, she's back.
434
00:11:33,849 --> 00:11:35,983
His name was Richard, mm-hmm.
435
00:11:35,984 --> 00:11:37,251
I do like that.
436
00:11:37,252 --> 00:11:37,885
Oh!
437
00:11:37,886 --> 00:11:38,953
I do, yeah.
438
00:11:38,954 --> 00:11:41,255
Yeah, Richard nugent.
439
00:11:41,256 --> 00:11:42,456
"Rick," maybe probably "Dick."
440
00:11:42,457 --> 00:11:43,624
Well, you'd call him "Dick,"
441
00:11:43,625 --> 00:11:44,258
wouldn't you?
442
00:11:44,259 --> 00:11:44,892
[ Laughs ]
443
00:11:44,893 --> 00:11:46,360
You'd be like, "where's Dick?"
444
00:11:46,361 --> 00:11:46,961
[ Chuckles ]
445
00:11:46,962 --> 00:11:48,462
"Did anyone see Dick the other day?"
446
00:11:48,463 --> 00:11:50,665
"Sometime when Dick's not
here, I think about Dick."
447
00:11:50,666 --> 00:11:52,366
I am not calling him "Merlin."
448
00:11:52,367 --> 00:11:53,534
Oh, that's all right.
449
00:11:53,535 --> 00:11:55,302
You can call him whatever you want.
450
00:11:55,303 --> 00:11:57,572
No, it's not okay, Mom.
451
00:11:57,573 --> 00:12:00,074
He will be named "Merlin," and
that's what you will call him.
452
00:12:00,075 --> 00:12:02,944
Look, you can't ever fold to her
or she will bully you, all right?
453
00:12:02,945 --> 00:12:05,379
You don't think the kids at
school are gonna tease her?
454
00:12:05,380 --> 00:12:06,914
"Oh, here comes Molly the Dolly."
455
00:12:06,915 --> 00:12:08,382
Better than "Janice the bitch."
456
00:12:08,383 --> 00:12:09,083
What did you say?
457
00:12:09,084 --> 00:12:11,251
He just said, "better
than Janice the bitch."
458
00:12:11,252 --> 00:12:12,152
[ Laughs ]
459
00:12:12,153 --> 00:12:13,487
Shut up, Ramona!
460
00:12:13,488 --> 00:12:16,757
Why don't we just table this whole
conversation for later, okay?
461
00:12:16,758 --> 00:12:20,360
And why don't we talk about
maybe having a shower?
462
00:12:20,361 --> 00:12:21,896
I would love one!
463
00:12:21,897 --> 00:12:22,329
Good.
464
00:12:22,330 --> 00:12:24,465
We should get one of those bouncy castles!
465
00:12:24,466 --> 00:12:25,566
Kids love those bouncy castles.
466
00:12:25,567 --> 00:12:28,168
No, I-I don't want kids there.
467
00:12:28,169 --> 00:12:29,770
You're gonna be a hell of a Mother.
468
00:12:29,771 --> 00:12:30,871
Hm.
469
00:12:30,872 --> 00:12:31,706
Thank you!
470
00:12:31,707 --> 00:12:32,773
Hey, everybody.
471
00:12:32,774 --> 00:12:33,908
Thanks for coming.
472
00:12:33,909 --> 00:12:37,578
Hey, Wendy, say hello to the fellas.
473
00:12:37,579 --> 00:12:38,479
I'm hitting that.
474
00:12:38,480 --> 00:12:40,447
I've been there and I've done that.
475
00:12:40,448 --> 00:12:42,316
Everybody's just standing around.
476
00:12:42,317 --> 00:12:43,484
Go do something funny.
477
00:12:43,485 --> 00:12:44,719
Hello, everyone.
478
00:12:44,720 --> 00:12:46,988
Uh, my name's Jim.
479
00:12:46,989 --> 00:12:50,057
I'm not actually, uh,
related to anybody here.
480
00:12:50,058 --> 00:12:53,728
I just have a fondness for
prostitutes and disabled people.
481
00:12:53,729 --> 00:12:55,129
[ Laughs ]
482
00:12:55,130 --> 00:12:57,898
Jesus, I'm dying, Steve.
483
00:12:57,899 --> 00:12:59,634
This is Steve.
484
00:12:59,635 --> 00:13:01,102
This is Billy's brother, Steve.
485
00:13:01,103 --> 00:13:03,237
You know, all relationships start out good.
486
00:13:03,238 --> 00:13:05,506
You know, before you
know it, there she goes.
487
00:13:05,507 --> 00:13:08,676
Off with the kid off to Cincinnati
with some Dick named Todd.
488
00:13:08,677 --> 00:13:09,443
Everybody loves Todd!!
489
00:13:09,444 --> 00:13:09,977
Steve.
490
00:13:09,978 --> 00:13:10,878
Yeah, we miss Todd!
491
00:13:10,879 --> 00:13:11,679
Where's Todd today?!
492
00:13:11,680 --> 00:13:12,479
Steve, thank you.
493
00:13:12,480 --> 00:13:12,980
Thank you.
494
00:13:12,981 --> 00:13:13,547
That was good.
495
00:13:13,548 --> 00:13:15,683
Okay, Walter, please say
something about marriage...
496
00:13:15,684 --> 00:13:16,283
Something.
497
00:13:16,284 --> 00:13:17,151
Oh, no, no, no.
498
00:13:17,152 --> 00:13:18,653
Yeah, sure, uh...
499
00:13:18,654 --> 00:13:19,486
Marriage.
500
00:13:19,487 --> 00:13:23,658
As we all know, it's a sacred
institution, but, uh, I'll tell
501
00:13:23,659 --> 00:13:26,360
ya, there's nothing wrong with hookers.
502
00:13:26,361 --> 00:13:27,862
[ Indistinct conversations ]
503
00:13:27,863 --> 00:13:29,783
Uh...
504
00:13:29,931 --> 00:13:32,566
Hey, Ms. Peggy!
505
00:13:32,567 --> 00:13:33,768
What's Peggy doing here?
506
00:13:33,769 --> 00:13:34,535
I don't know.
507
00:13:34,536 --> 00:13:35,670
Mom must have invited her.
508
00:13:35,671 --> 00:13:37,237
She looks good.
509
00:13:37,238 --> 00:13:38,639
Yeah, she does.
510
00:13:38,640 --> 00:13:39,807
You messed up.
511
00:13:39,808 --> 00:13:40,941
Hi! Thank you for coming.
512
00:13:40,942 --> 00:13:41,341
Hi.
513
00:13:41,342 --> 00:13:41,809
Congrats.
514
00:13:41,810 --> 00:13:42,743
Thank you so much.
515
00:13:42,744 --> 00:13:43,911
We're really happy.
516
00:13:43,912 --> 00:13:44,812
Hi.
517
00:13:44,813 --> 00:13:45,813
Okay.
518
00:13:45,814 --> 00:13:47,214
Oh, I hate happiness.
519
00:13:47,215 --> 00:13:48,315
We could, uh...
520
00:13:48,316 --> 00:13:49,449
[ Clears throat ]
521
00:13:49,450 --> 00:13:51,919
Maybe slip off to a motel later on, and...
522
00:13:51,920 --> 00:13:53,921
We're pretty expensive, is the thing.
523
00:13:53,922 --> 00:13:59,202
I got an old pool table
I'll swap you, but, uh...
524
00:13:59,260 --> 00:14:00,427
Good to see you, Clay.
525
00:14:00,428 --> 00:14:01,461
It's a stupid name.
526
00:14:01,462 --> 00:14:02,196
I mean, "Merlin"?
527
00:14:02,197 --> 00:14:03,164
Are you kidding me?
528
00:14:03,165 --> 00:14:04,464
Who names their child "Merlin"?
529
00:14:04,465 --> 00:14:05,833
What is it, a wizard?
530
00:14:05,834 --> 00:14:07,267
I do love Hogwarts.
531
00:14:07,268 --> 00:14:08,035
Me too.
532
00:14:08,036 --> 00:14:10,616
H.R. pufnstuf.
533
00:14:11,673 --> 00:14:13,007
Oh, forget it.
534
00:14:13,008 --> 00:14:14,909
It's time to party!
535
00:14:14,910 --> 00:14:18,212
[ Upbeat dance music plays ]
536
00:14:18,213 --> 00:14:19,213
Woo-hoo!
537
00:14:19,214 --> 00:14:22,214
What a wicked party!
538
00:14:22,851 --> 00:14:25,191
[ Cheering ]
539
00:14:25,887 --> 00:14:27,154
Together: Two words.
540
00:14:27,155 --> 00:14:28,055
Old bitch!
541
00:14:28,056 --> 00:14:28,655
[ Laughs ]
542
00:14:28,656 --> 00:14:29,489
All right, son.
543
00:14:29,490 --> 00:14:30,290
Okay, that was funny.
544
00:14:30,291 --> 00:14:32,426
I could take you out in the woodshed.
545
00:14:32,427 --> 00:14:33,627
You want to get out of here?
546
00:14:33,628 --> 00:14:34,328
Okay, cutie.
547
00:14:34,329 --> 00:14:35,329
Where do you want to go?
548
00:14:35,330 --> 00:14:36,964
The bathroom.
549
00:14:36,965 --> 00:14:37,497
Okay.
550
00:14:37,498 --> 00:14:38,298
Get up here.
551
00:14:38,299 --> 00:14:39,433
Jesus don't like ugly!
552
00:14:39,434 --> 00:14:42,554
Get your ass up here!
553
00:14:43,038 --> 00:14:44,839
This child could be named "Merlin."
554
00:14:44,840 --> 00:14:46,907
That is the stupidest name I've ever heard!
555
00:14:46,908 --> 00:14:49,076
Well, he might become a magician.
556
00:14:49,077 --> 00:14:54,115
I gotta tell you, mate, maybe she's a
prostitute, but she's really nice.
557
00:14:54,116 --> 00:14:55,515
She's pretty great.
558
00:14:55,516 --> 00:14:56,751
Okay, everybody.
559
00:14:56,752 --> 00:15:01,355
Let's all open the presents you
got for Wendy and for Richard.
560
00:15:01,356 --> 00:15:02,957
It's "Merlin."
561
00:15:02,958 --> 00:15:04,291
[ All sigh ]
562
00:15:04,292 --> 00:15:07,661
Look at the little baby-whore costume.
563
00:15:07,662 --> 00:15:08,229
[ Laughs ]
564
00:15:08,230 --> 00:15:10,497
It's a little nurse outfit!
565
00:15:10,498 --> 00:15:11,398
Oh, look!
566
00:15:11,399 --> 00:15:12,532
Slutty baby nurse!
567
00:15:12,533 --> 00:15:13,700
Shut up, Steve!
568
00:15:13,701 --> 00:15:15,269
Okay, enough. All right.
569
00:15:15,270 --> 00:15:16,470
He's my brother.
570
00:15:16,471 --> 00:15:18,072
I'll put it on.
571
00:15:18,073 --> 00:15:18,873
Oh!
572
00:15:18,874 --> 00:15:20,307
Hey, get him off her!
573
00:15:20,308 --> 00:15:22,409
All right, all right, come on.
574
00:15:22,410 --> 00:15:23,610
Aw, I'm no fun!
575
00:15:23,611 --> 00:15:27,014
Wendy and Richard thank you
very much for your gifts.
576
00:15:27,015 --> 00:15:28,015
It's "Merlin."
577
00:15:28,016 --> 00:15:30,818
And in just a moment, we
will be doing the pi?ata.
578
00:15:30,819 --> 00:15:31,685
[ Applause ]
579
00:15:31,686 --> 00:15:33,287
Billy, I need to talk to you.
580
00:15:33,288 --> 00:15:35,289
I'm not changing the damn name.
581
00:15:35,290 --> 00:15:36,791
No, it isn't about that.
582
00:15:36,792 --> 00:15:37,391
What?
583
00:15:37,392 --> 00:15:38,358
What now, Mom?
584
00:15:38,359 --> 00:15:40,861
I do not want to have a bastard grandchild.
585
00:15:40,862 --> 00:15:43,264
Mom, would you stop calling
the baby a "bastard"?
586
00:15:43,265 --> 00:15:45,332
You're upsetting the prostitutes.
587
00:15:45,333 --> 00:15:46,867
I want you to get married.
588
00:15:46,868 --> 00:15:47,935
[ Laughing ] No way!
589
00:15:47,936 --> 00:15:52,273
Billy, there is a beautiful girl
out there who is scared and
590
00:15:52,274 --> 00:15:54,474
vulnerable and having your baby.
591
00:15:54,475 --> 00:16:00,055
I want you to roll on out
there, and I want you to...
592
00:16:00,982 --> 00:16:02,382
Give her this ring.
593
00:16:02,383 --> 00:16:03,483
Where'd you get that?
594
00:16:03,484 --> 00:16:05,719
Your grandmother.
595
00:16:05,720 --> 00:16:08,789
Come on. It's very special.
596
00:16:08,790 --> 00:16:10,390
You won't regret it.
597
00:16:10,391 --> 00:16:14,061
It's gonna be a beautiful wedding.
598
00:16:14,062 --> 00:16:15,629
Look, I gotta go to the bathroom.
599
00:16:15,630 --> 00:16:19,633
I promise you won't be disappointed.
600
00:16:19,634 --> 00:16:21,335
Hey, bro!
601
00:16:21,336 --> 00:16:23,304
You ready to be a daddy?
602
00:16:23,305 --> 00:16:24,872
I guess.
603
00:16:24,873 --> 00:16:26,440
You'll be fine.
604
00:16:26,441 --> 00:16:27,441
Hey, Steve.
605
00:16:27,442 --> 00:16:28,976
What?
606
00:16:28,977 --> 00:16:30,211
Should I get married?
607
00:16:30,212 --> 00:16:33,932
Brother, I'd marry that chick.
608
00:16:34,415 --> 00:16:35,649
Come on, Billy!
609
00:16:35,650 --> 00:16:37,384
We're about to do the pi?ata!
610
00:16:37,385 --> 00:16:39,186
Okay, I'll be right there.
611
00:16:39,187 --> 00:16:40,921
Did you see those jugs?
612
00:16:40,922 --> 00:16:43,423
Hey, hold on, pregnant chick!
613
00:16:43,424 --> 00:16:48,662
A pi?ata of a boy in a
wheelchair at a baby shower.
614
00:16:48,663 --> 00:16:52,563
That's about as bad as it gets.
615
00:16:52,667 --> 00:16:54,887
Mom. Mom!
616
00:16:55,337 --> 00:16:55,903
What?
617
00:16:55,904 --> 00:16:56,937
I'm gonna do it.
618
00:16:56,938 --> 00:16:58,438
I'm gonna ask her to marry me.
619
00:16:58,439 --> 00:17:02,042
Oh, honey, I am so proud of you!
620
00:17:02,043 --> 00:17:04,683
There's a man!
621
00:17:06,248 --> 00:17:08,228
What?!
622
00:17:08,283 --> 00:17:10,563
[ Screams ]
623
00:17:11,889 --> 00:17:14,229
[ Cheering ]
624
00:17:14,591 --> 00:17:15,224
Everybody!
625
00:17:15,225 --> 00:17:18,394
Billy, here, has an announcement to make.
626
00:17:18,395 --> 00:17:20,429
Wendy, there's something I want to ask you.
627
00:17:20,430 --> 00:17:22,164
Oh, do you want to have sex again?
628
00:17:22,165 --> 00:17:23,365
Oh, she's a keeper, son.
629
00:17:23,366 --> 00:17:24,133
She's a keeper.
630
00:17:24,134 --> 00:17:27,202
Yes, of course I want to have sex with you.
631
00:17:27,203 --> 00:17:30,172
But it's more important than sex.
632
00:17:30,173 --> 00:17:30,773
Wendy...
633
00:17:30,774 --> 00:17:32,341
Get your drunk ass back here now!
634
00:17:32,342 --> 00:17:33,009
Will you...
635
00:17:33,010 --> 00:17:34,410
I'll get it!
636
00:17:34,411 --> 00:17:35,244
Ahh!
637
00:17:35,245 --> 00:17:36,211
Oh, my God!
638
00:17:36,212 --> 00:17:38,612
[ Screaming ]
639
00:17:42,352 --> 00:17:43,586
I'll bring the car around.
640
00:17:43,587 --> 00:17:44,453
Get her out back.
641
00:17:44,454 --> 00:17:45,154
I'm driving!
642
00:17:45,155 --> 00:17:45,988
I'm coming, baby!
643
00:17:45,989 --> 00:17:47,122
Move out of the way, Rodney!
644
00:17:47,123 --> 00:17:48,658
You know the breathing technique.
645
00:17:48,659 --> 00:17:50,292
You've learned it from the doctor.
646
00:17:50,293 --> 00:17:52,327
Just in and out, in and out, okay?
647
00:17:52,328 --> 00:17:54,830
Little, tiny breaths.
648
00:17:54,831 --> 00:17:56,198
It's gonna be fine.
649
00:17:56,199 --> 00:17:57,332
Steve's got us.
650
00:17:57,333 --> 00:17:58,701
Wanda wenderson?
651
00:17:58,702 --> 00:18:00,570
Yeah, yeah. That's us.
652
00:18:00,571 --> 00:18:01,203
Come with me.
653
00:18:01,204 --> 00:18:04,264
All right. Let's go.
654
00:18:04,274 --> 00:18:08,811
You look like Michael
Jackson's son, blanket.
655
00:18:08,812 --> 00:18:10,046
I know.
656
00:18:10,047 --> 00:18:11,447
You're doing good! Doing good!
657
00:18:11,448 --> 00:18:12,414
[ Straining ]
658
00:18:12,415 --> 00:18:13,515
You're doing great, honey.
659
00:18:13,516 --> 00:18:14,617
Okay, it's crowning!
660
00:18:14,618 --> 00:18:16,285
It's crowning!
661
00:18:16,286 --> 00:18:17,019
You've got this.
662
00:18:17,020 --> 00:18:17,753
One more push.
663
00:18:17,754 --> 00:18:19,488
Come on, one more!
664
00:18:19,489 --> 00:18:21,889
[ Screaming ]
665
00:18:21,959 --> 00:18:22,692
Is it a boy?
666
00:18:22,693 --> 00:18:25,327
I think you'll find
that's an offensive term.
667
00:18:25,328 --> 00:18:26,862
[ Baby cries ]
668
00:18:26,863 --> 00:18:27,897
It's black!
669
00:18:27,898 --> 00:18:28,898
It's black.
670
00:18:28,899 --> 00:18:29,999
It's black!!
671
00:18:30,000 --> 00:18:31,233
It's black, Steve!
672
00:18:31,234 --> 00:18:32,267
It's bla-a-a-a-ck!
673
00:18:32,268 --> 00:18:33,102
Billy, it's black!
674
00:18:33,103 --> 00:18:34,003
Walter, it's black!
675
00:18:34,004 --> 00:18:35,370
It's black, it's black, it's black!
676
00:18:35,371 --> 00:18:35,905
I'll say.
677
00:18:35,906 --> 00:18:37,039
Buh-buh-buh-buh buh-buh .
678
00:18:37,040 --> 00:18:38,007
Black!
679
00:18:38,008 --> 00:18:40,977
Oh, Mum, it's black.
680
00:18:40,978 --> 00:18:42,612
It's...
681
00:18:42,613 --> 00:18:45,014
A beautiful black baby.
682
00:18:45,015 --> 00:18:45,615
It's just...
683
00:18:45,616 --> 00:18:46,983
Could have been happy with any...
684
00:18:46,984 --> 00:18:47,583
[ Door slams ]
685
00:18:47,584 --> 00:18:49,351
Could have been an Asian.
686
00:18:49,352 --> 00:18:50,219
You know?
687
00:18:50,220 --> 00:18:53,055
Could have been hispanic or
"Latino," I think the term is.
688
00:18:53,056 --> 00:18:56,592
I don't even know what they
like to be called, but the most
689
00:18:56,593 --> 00:19:00,973
important thing is, it's not his, so...
690
00:19:02,032 --> 00:19:04,012
Black.
691
00:19:06,770 --> 00:19:08,504
It's black!
692
00:19:08,505 --> 00:19:10,905
It's black!
693
00:19:11,407 --> 00:19:14,107
You okay, honey?
694
00:19:14,711 --> 00:19:17,546
Well, at least I don't
have to take care of it.
695
00:19:17,547 --> 00:19:18,814
It's a boy!
696
00:19:18,815 --> 00:19:20,116
It's a boy!
697
00:19:20,117 --> 00:19:21,316
Yay!
698
00:19:21,317 --> 00:19:22,885
It's a boy!
699
00:19:22,886 --> 00:19:24,086
It's... it's black!
700
00:19:24,087 --> 00:19:24,654
Yes!
701
00:19:24,655 --> 00:19:26,055
Yes! Then it's not mine!
702
00:19:26,056 --> 00:19:28,891
[ Chanting ] Black, black,
black, black, black, black...
703
00:19:28,892 --> 00:19:30,526
Thunder's gone, Jim.
704
00:19:30,527 --> 00:19:33,167
Thunder's gone.
705
00:19:33,363 --> 00:19:36,723
Billy, how are you doing?
706
00:19:37,300 --> 00:19:39,769
I'm good, dad.
707
00:19:39,770 --> 00:19:44,140
Um, do you guys mind if
we have a moment alone?
708
00:19:44,141 --> 00:19:45,340
[ Birds of Tokyo's "lanterns"
709
00:19:45,341 --> 00:19:46,341
[ plays ]
710
00:19:46,342 --> 00:19:47,442
I'm sorry, Billy.
711
00:19:47,443 --> 00:19:48,477
[ Door closes ]
712
00:19:48,478 --> 00:19:50,980
I really thought he was yours.
713
00:19:50,981 --> 00:19:52,148
I know.
714
00:19:52,149 --> 00:19:53,315
It's fine.
715
00:19:53,316 --> 00:19:55,484
When I start to think aloud.
716
00:19:55,485 --> 00:19:59,188
Any idea whose baby it could be?
717
00:19:59,189 --> 00:20:01,490
I guess it could be my boyfriend, Cedric.
718
00:20:01,491 --> 00:20:02,257
Cedric.
719
00:20:02,258 --> 00:20:04,526
In darkness I leave .
720
00:20:04,527 --> 00:20:07,462
For a place I've never seen .
721
00:20:07,463 --> 00:20:10,332
It's been calling out to me .
722
00:20:10,333 --> 00:20:11,767
That is where I should be .
723
00:20:11,768 --> 00:20:14,228
I should go.
724
00:20:15,005 --> 00:20:19,085
We never carried days on our own...
725
00:20:19,776 --> 00:20:21,711
Bye, Billy.
726
00:20:21,712 --> 00:20:22,544
Bye.
727
00:20:22,545 --> 00:20:24,980
Up to us to know .
728
00:20:24,981 --> 00:20:28,884
I guess it's just me and you now, Merlin...
729
00:20:28,885 --> 00:20:30,319
Maybe "Cedric."
730
00:20:30,320 --> 00:20:31,721
I really didn't want a child.
731
00:20:31,722 --> 00:20:34,489
I mean, I'm too old for all of
that, and have to deal with it.
732
00:20:34,490 --> 00:20:37,226
I mean, I've got two sons who
are like babies anyway, so I've
733
00:20:37,227 --> 00:20:39,962
got plenty to deal with, believe
me, and then there's you.
734
00:20:39,963 --> 00:20:44,700
I don't need a baby, and I don't need to
take care of anything else but myself.
735
00:20:44,701 --> 00:20:47,669
We will light our way .
736
00:20:47,670 --> 00:20:49,504
With our lanterns on .
737
00:20:49,505 --> 00:20:51,207
You really wanted that baby, didn't you?
738
00:20:51,208 --> 00:20:53,109
On we march .
739
00:20:53,110 --> 00:20:54,276
Till we meet the dawn .
740
00:20:54,277 --> 00:20:56,317
I did.
741
00:20:56,546 --> 00:20:57,246
Me too.
742
00:20:57,247 --> 00:20:58,881
We will light our way .
743
00:20:58,882 --> 00:21:02,002
With our lanterns on .
744
00:21:02,652 --> 00:21:04,820
As we walk out .
745
00:21:04,821 --> 00:21:07,689
Without question, without, doubt.
746
00:21:07,690 --> 00:21:11,426
In the light that we have
found it is finally clear .
747
00:21:11,427 --> 00:21:15,697
Billy... you can always get
another girl pregnant.
748
00:21:15,698 --> 00:21:17,833
You're right. I know.
749
00:21:17,834 --> 00:21:19,068
It's fine.
750
00:21:19,069 --> 00:21:21,237
We are ready, we are young.
751
00:21:21,238 --> 00:21:25,107
You can always get another girl pregnant.
752
00:21:25,108 --> 00:21:26,675
I know.
753
00:21:26,676 --> 00:21:30,636
We never carried days on our own.
754
00:21:31,248 --> 00:21:32,714
Walter?
755
00:21:32,715 --> 00:21:34,216
Hm?
756
00:21:34,217 --> 00:21:38,587
If I cleaned up the house, would
you be willing to move back in?
757
00:21:38,588 --> 00:21:40,322
Well...
758
00:21:40,323 --> 00:21:43,458
Uh, yeah, I'd love to.
759
00:21:43,459 --> 00:21:46,695
You know, I was looking forward
to taking little Merlin fishing.
760
00:21:46,696 --> 00:21:48,831
No, it's not "Merlin," it's "Richard."
761
00:21:48,832 --> 00:21:50,299
"Richard" is a good, solid name.
762
00:21:50,300 --> 00:21:51,200
Oh, come on.
763
00:21:51,201 --> 00:21:53,435
Everybody would be calling him "Dick."
764
00:21:53,436 --> 00:21:55,137
"Hey, where's Dick?"
765
00:21:55,138 --> 00:21:56,872
"Where's my Dick?"
766
00:21:56,873 --> 00:21:58,139
"Hey, look! A Dick!"
767
00:21:58,140 --> 00:21:59,942
"I'm holding on to my Dick!"
768
00:21:59,943 --> 00:22:00,810
Richard!
769
00:22:00,811 --> 00:22:04,351
That is where I should be .
770
00:22:04,376 --> 00:22:12,000
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771
00:22:12,050 --> 00:22:16,600
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